Dear diary,


    This magic stick is really handy.


    It took care of the octopi infestation in the toilet like a professional grade flame thrower. I just point it at stuff that I don''t want to see and boom! They turn into a pile of ashes. And it somehow doesn''t burn the house down!A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    I love this stick.


    Of course I love you too. In fact I love you more than this magic stick could ever hope to be loved.


    Well... We fixed that window but those octopi left a bunch of slime and slobber all over the walls. I think we should probably clean that before everyone gets back home. They might slip and hit their heads. Then I won''t have people to cook me food!


    That would be a disaster.


    Love,


    Tina