Aster stepped into an entrance to the Depths that she’d chosen strategically. She stepped further into the darkness until she was enshrouded in it. She checked her surroundings, shining her light around. “Hello?”


    Her voice echoed back to her alone, and this was a less-used entrance, so she thought it was probably safe enough. She covered her lantern with a thick shade cloth. “Okay, you can come out now.”


    A moment later, a shadowy substance spilled from the mark on Aster’s leg and formed into a vaguely humanoid shape, like before. This time, though, the shape continued to fill out and refine, resolving into a Shade that appeared common to around the third or fourth level of the Depths.


    Tune sighed contentedly, settling back in the more complete form. “Thaaat’s better. Thank you, Aster.” Their voice had a light husky quality to it. They stretched, then climbed to their feet and dusted themself off.


    Aster held out the clothes they’d requested from their old room, and she also handed them a large translucent shade cloth, which they accepted. Aster looked away by instinct as they dressed, then looked back as they draped the shade cloth over themself. They wore a light green sweater with something like a shawl over it, with a light-to-dark purple background and yellow and white sun and star patterns dotting it. Their eyes still had dark sclera and pupils, but now their irises had some color back, one eye purple and the other a mix of yellow and green. “So, you alright with me following you to the rest of your group?”


    “Should be fine. Let me know if you notice anything potentially hazardous.”


    “Will do.”


    They set off, with Aster warning them whenever they approached an area with an opening to the sky or an abundance of other light, and with Tune lagging behind a few paces to stay mostly out of the reach of her lantern’s light. Tune periodically scanned their surroundings, their vision piercing far further into the dark than Aster’s could. As much as they knew they’d lost, there were things they’d gained too. They didn’t really want it to turn out that they preferred this state to their previous life, though. Oddly, they found themself wanting to have lost a lot, because that meant they could search for it.


    If, after finding everything they could, they still had this gnawing emptiness, what options would that leave them with?


    “How familiar are you with the ground level of the Depths?” Aster asked.


    “Not as familiar as I probably used to be. It’s not the safest place for a Shade. More natural light than most levels, and too many Lanterns.”


    Aster nodded. Her long, fluffy pale golden hair ruffled and flowed as she moved, brushing the hem of her long cloak. Tune chuckled softly, watching how it moved. It seemed awfully impractical to have that much hair, but it was likely a safety measure in how Lucenari stored light in their hair. There were the stars on their skin, of course, not to mention their stella veins, but hair this long added a lot of volume to potential storage. It probably helped with staying warm too.


    Tune felt a stab of loss and longing as they thought about it. Not about having that much hair - they weren’t sure they could stand it, even with its benefits - but… the light. They couldn’t really remember what it had been like to use and shape the light, but they at least knew they missed it. They weren’t entirely sure why.


    Well, they knew there was more they could learn about their newfound abilities as a Shade. That was a world that was much less explored, as far as they knew. It was exciting to think of exploring uncharted territory, it just… stung that they’d never had a choice in it.


    Eventually, a good way into their journey, they passed their first echo crystal. Those were less common on the levels nearer the surface, especially with how they were frequently harvested, but they did keep appearing. This one didn’t react to Tune, of course. The vast majority didn’t. They skirted around the sphere of its light.


    “How far did you guys get before you fell into the swallowrock?”


    Aster glanced at them, her eyes slightly narrowed. “How long were you watching me before you made your move?”


    Tune scratched their cheek absently, sheepish. “Uhh… I’ve seen you in the Depths a few times. I knew I might not get another shot at it if I messed things up the first time, so I watched several Lanterns and waited for an opportunity. There were many Lanterns I wouldn’t have risked, for various reasons.” They tapped their fingers together nervously as they walked, a little uncomfortable to be openly discussing what they’d done, even though they understood it. “You were one I was willing to try because… you don’t seem to default to killing, even when you’re afraid. From what I could tell, you watch and assess before acting. You don’t want to eradicate every creature from the Depths, at least.”


    Aster stopped in her tracks, her expression unclear. Tune stopped walking in turn, but continued talking. “Correct me if I’m wrong, of course, about any of this. I am sorry that the good I saw from you is what made you more vulnerable to my influence, and the problems it caused for you. I hope it doesn’t undercut how I see that as…” They hesitated. I don’t know her that well. “Well, it’s why I was willing to trust you at all, with such unstable circumstances. I hope you can see that as some good you did, even though it kind of hurt you.”


    Aster seemed deep in thought for a moment, then chuckled. “It’s strange. I… wish you hadn’t had to take control of me to do what you needed to, and maybe there were better ways, but… I’m glad you could see something like that in me.” She hesitated, and apparently thought better of whatever she was thinking of saying. Tune itched with curiosity about that, but it didn’t seem like a good time to try prying.


    “Well, good job if you’ve somehow managed to keep your ideals and actions aligned.” Tune chuckled dryly. “That’s, ah… quite rare.”


    Aster winced visibly. “I… try to. I can’t say I’m perfect either.”


    “S’okay, no one ever is.” Tune started moving again to signal to Aster to do the same.


    “Oh. Uh, sorry.” She kept walking.


    “So uh. To answer your question,” Tune began again, “I was watching you since you came in the entrance this time, though I had watched you before. I paid special attention because you came with more people than usual, and appeared outfitted for an extended journey. It looked like the chance I’d been waiting for.” They blew air up towards their face in a mildly cathartic exhale. They resisted the urge to clear their throat, not wanting to show too much awkwardness. “So yeah, it probably wouldn’t um, be inaccurate to say I was stalking you, but please don’t take it out of context. I never intended to hurt you, and I wasn’t trying to keep control of you long-term.” They swallowed. Because I’m not skilled enough to do that. Would I have done it if I could’ve? What does it mean that I’m not even sure of my own answer to that?


    Aster nodded, then abruptly burst out laughing. “Uh, sorry, I just - ‘yes, I was stalking you, just don’t take it out of context’? I get it, I understand, it’s just-” She chuckled again and cleared her throat. “Yeah, um. It’s an odd situation. I appreciate the honesty, at least, though it also… well, seeming honest would suit you whether you were genuine or not, y’know? But I’m glad you’re trying to explain.”


    Tune nodded, but she wouldn’t be able to see from in front of them. “Mhm, I see.”


    Aster paused, stepping over a small puddle and splashing through the next she couldn''t easily avoid. “So... how long have you been down here?”


    Tune sighed softly. “It''s not easy to tell time down here. I''m sure you know that, but you''re used to at least having your clock. It doesn''t tell you what day it is, though. Months and years are... harder to determine. I only started trying to keep time a few... months, maybe? Into being here. I''ve had to abandon places I took refuge in, though, which left behind notes I''d kept. I think I''ve been here for at least four years.”


    “Have you been alone all that time?”


    Tune hummed briefly. “Kinda. I see plenty of Lanterns, plenty of Shades like me, plenty of other creatures in the Depths. They tend to either ignore me or try to kill me, though, so it''s not exactly... heartening.” They let out a breath. “Look, Aster, with all due respect, you don''t have to understand me. You just need to know enough to judge whether I''m a threat to you or your group.”


    It took Aster a moment to respond. “I suppose that part is up to you. I prefer to have more information, and I’d rather know how to help you, but you don’t have to tell me.”


    There was a stretch where they walked in silence. It was a bit uncomfortable for Tune, but less uncomfortable than self-disclosure, at least. It’s not like I even have much to hide. Right? There were probably people out there that knew much more about Tune than they themself did. They couldn’t know how much they might have to hide.


    “Aster… before we find the others, I should clarify something.” Aster glanced back at them, so they continued. “You''ve… lost people to the Darkening, haven’t you?” Tune didn’t wait for a response. “I need you to understand that this new information - me being sapient and alive, and all that implies - it doesn’t necessarily mean any of them are alive. It just means they aren’t confirmed dead.” They paused briefly. “Just… don’t get your hopes up too high, okay?”


    Aster was quiet for a while. “I know.” Another pause. “Thank you for telling me.”


    Given the solemnity in her voice, she definitely had lost people, or at least knew people that had. Would she still look for them, now that she had reason to believe there was hope? Would Tune even stop her if they could, if that was what she wanted to do?


    Were Tune’s efforts really any less foolhardy?


    Tune hummed. Hopefully Aster wouldn’t find it creepy. They probably would’ve done it anyway, but it’d be good to know. Aster didn’t seem the type to answer honestly if she did find it creepy, though. Probably no point in asking.


    After a silence, Aster glanced back. “Hey, um,” she began. Even higher levels of hesitance, impressive. Always a good start. “Stop me if any of my questions feel invasive, but I forgot to ask, uh, can Shades have a sense of gender like Lucenari?”


    Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.


    Tune looked at her for a moment. “I don''t know. Probably. Maybe? That part seems to depend on having some kind of organized society, which I’m not aware of if we have it. I dunno whether we experience any of it the same as Lucenari. At least some of us used to be Lucenari, so it’d probably make sense if not much changed there, but it could’ve, I guess. I haven’t exactly met many other friendly Shades, and I’ve got bigger concerns at the moment.”


    “Ah. That, yeah, that makes sense. So, do you have a preference on how you’re seen?”


    “Me?” Tune let out a breath. “Honestly, I’d rather opt out of the whole gender thing much of the time, but I also don’t really care how I’m seen that way.” They shrugged. “Just, I guess I’m not a fan of being called an ‘it’. It depends on how people use the word, but Shades are frequently dehumanized, so I’d rather not be put in the same category as inanimate objects, even though sometimes they mean it more as for a creature.”


    “Understandable. That, ah, makes me wonder how many creatures we’re wrong about, in a similar way.”


    Tune glanced at her, peering around her to try to read her expression. She seemed pensive. “Yeah, could be more than we think,” they said.


    “Does that... not bother you?”


    “It does, to some extent. I just don’t have the time or energy to worry about it too much.”


    Aster briefly clenched her fists, and just as quickly relaxed them. Tune raised their eyebrows. “Y’know, even if I care too little, that doesn’t mean caring too much is necessarily better.”


    Aster stopped in her tracks and turned around abruptly. “But if at least I don’t err on the side of caution that way-!” She stopped herself, realizing she’d raised her voice. She took a breath and halfway managed to steady her voice. “Then... who will?” She looked them in the eyes, and Tune could sense that the blend of emotions in her eyes was more complicated than they could easily read. That brought up a sense of intense curiosity in them, but they instinctively pushed it away. I’ll probably never get to see or unravel any of whatever that is. Aster tried to take a few deep breaths quickly, which didn’t really work, but she managed to calm herself down a bit. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m not mad at you. At least not specifically. Uh..” She rearranged her cloak nervously. “I just...” Tune could almost see the gears turning, watch her grasping at straws. She appeared surprised and ashamed at her own outburst.


    “Look,” Tune resisted a sigh. “You don’t have to explain it to me. Thanks for trying to make sure it didn’t bother me. Just... You can’t carry the world on your shoulders. I’m sure you know that. So... why try to?” C’mon, don’t bother with unsolicited advice. People don’t usually like it anyway, even if they might need it.


    “Because I want to believe that I can. Or at least that someone can, or that collectively maybe we can all do it together. So I prete-... I do what I can.”


    “But if you crush yourself under the weight, you won’t be able to help anyone anyway.” Tune paused, trying to let it sink in a bit, then sighed. “Do you ever talk about this with someone that actually knows you?”


    “Um...”


    “Please do that.”


    “Wish me luck,” Aster said with a sarcastic edge to her voice.


    “Mm, good luck, but don’t wait around for luck. You can’t count on it. Sometimes you’ve gotta concoct it yourself.”


    “Got a recipe?”


    “It’s a work in progress.” Tune hesitated. “Let’s keep going.”


    “Right.” Aster sighed softly and they continued walking.


    Every now and then, they would pass through a cavern with small round lights floating languidly through the air. They didn''t produce enough light to be much help to the Lucenari, nor much harm to Shades and co. It was still unclear to the Lucenari what they were or what they did, so Aster defaulted to avoiding them. That was probably smart.


    Tune wasn''t alone anymore, though. At least, not for now. They had a fail-safe in Aster, for the moment. So, naturally, they smiled mischievously and swiped at one of the lights.


    It was just high enough to be out of their reach, so they glanced at Aster to keep themself walking in approximately the right direction and took a slight detour of a few steps to the side.


    They snatched a little floating light out of the air. It was soft and sort of squishy, like some sort of rice confection. Well, less heavy and dense than that though. A rice confection made out of cotton? Or maybe just a cotton ball. Tune may have just been trying to mentally defend their initial urge to eat it.


    It burned their skin slightly to touch it, so they wrapped their hand in dimming cloth so they could hold it. It was... Warm, comfortably so as long as they didn''t let it touch their skin directly.


    They started walking again, having subconsciously stopped to marvel at the phenomenon. Aster had noticed their pause and turned to look, though.


    “Uh, what are you doing?”


    “What does it look like I''m doing?” Tune smiled, bouncing the near-weightless floating light on their covered palm. “I''m not alone right now, so I figured a bit of experimentation was in order.”


    “Experimen-... Tune. That seems less like rigorous testing and more like playing with something you''re curious about.”


    Tune shrugged, allowing themself to grin a little wider as they bounced it from hand to hand. “The line between the two is fuzzy at best. Just like these lights. Well okay, they''re not quite fuzzy per se, but almost.”


    “O...kay, I''ll accept that, but what about the potential danger?”


    “I''ve got you for that.”


    “What if it affected me too?”


    “What are the chances of that, when Lanterns have a history of traveling past them without incident?”


    Aster massaged her temples. “Is this what having a younger sibling is like?”


    “No idea. I mean, uh, heey, you don''t even know if you''re older than me!” Tune chuckled and caught the light in the shade cloak, bundling it along with them. They could just barely see its dimmed light through the fabric as long as they didn''t let it overlap. “See, no harm done! I''m taking it with me, but I''ll let it go if it seems dangerous. Let me know if you ever wanna poke it. I wanna see how it interacts with Lucenari.”


    Aster sighed. “Aalrighty then. Just keep an eye on it. On we go.” They kept walking.


    “So, are you sure of the route they took after you fell?” Tune looked at her.


    “I''m not fully certain, but if all went well, I know where they should be.”


    “Ah. Comforting.”


    “Look, I have maps for a good section of the journey. Even if they couldn''t use the route for whatever reason, we talked briefly about backup routes. We''ll find them.”


    “Sounds decidedly better than it could be.”


    “That statement is impressively ambiguous.” Aster glanced back at them, raising her eyebrows.


    “Yep, I was wondering if you’d notice.”


    Every so often, they passed motes of green light floating around moss or vines. Those seemed similar to the other lights, but after Tune brushed their hand through a few, they simply scattered at their touch, then drifted lazily back toward their greenery. They didn’t give off much if any heat, and felt kinda like room-temperature flakes of snow.


    They passed patches of translucent vines. Tune reached out to compare them against their fingertips, looking at the cave wall through both of them layered against each other.


    “How common are these in this area?”


    Aster kept up her steady pace as she responded. “Those tend to be more common deeper down, but they aren’t unheard of once you’ve gotten deep enough into the surface level. It cuts through the mountains, so... I assume that eventually we’ll be beyond any of the openings to the sky.” She glanced back at them slightly. “So you... really don’t know anything about the Darkening?”


    “Not much. I highly doubt I’d know more than you, since I lost my memory of what it was like. I can confirm, at least, that the pitch-black substance you call the Dark is distinct from the actual darkness here, though regular ol’ darkness and shadows are relevant to Shades in some ways. The regular darkness itself doesn’t progress the Darkening, does it?”


    “Not... exactly. We’d need to do more formal research, but it seems like it doesn’t progress the Darkening itself, but it does allow the inkblood to spread, which seems to expand the reach of the light sensitivity and other symptoms, depending on what stage of Darkening the person is in.”


    Tune rubbed their chin absently. “Interesting. Well... we can both do some tests, if you think we’ll have time. See what we can find out about the Dark before we bring your Tainted allies further into its domain.”


    Aster’s shoulders tensed slightly at that. Ah. Maybe not the best word choice.


    She stopped suddenly in front of them, though. Tune slowed to a stop in turn. “What?”


    Aster stepped out of the way, shielding her lantern so it didn’t shine on them. In front of her, a patch of the rock was partially translucent.


    Tune edged up as close as they could get without risking the light, examining the stone. The patch wasn’t all that deep, so all they could see behind it was more rock. They tried touching it, and their hand went through about a finger length of the rock before the rest felt more solid. It was somehow softer than usual, more malleable, though prodding it further didn’t actually deform the rock. “Huh.”


    “Have you seen this before?”


    “Nope.” As they prodded around inside the outside of the rock, their fingers started tingling with a deep, pervasive coldness, delving straight to their bones. They withdrew. “It’s... cold, after a few seconds. The intangible portion especially.” They shook their hand, a little concerned the sensation wouldn’t go away, but they did feel it start to fade.


    Aster stared at the rock, her eyebrows furrowed.


    Tune looked at it again, examining its shape, and noticed a piece jutting out. Like a... crystal.


    They grabbed the crystal and it broke off soundlessly. It didn’t respond to their touch at all beyond that. On further inspection, it definitely looked like an echo crystal, just... silent and colorless and empty.


    The coldness started to affect their bare hand again, so they dropped the echo crystal in a pouch at their side for later examination.


    “Did you uh... sense anything from it?”


    “Nothing. Even less than regular crystals.”


    “That’s... really strange. All of it.” Aster bit her lip, almost glaring at the patch of translucent rock. “I don’t know when this started. We’ll have to keep an eye on anything that seems related.” She let out a breath. “Including the pouch you stored it in. We don’t know what it might do. Please be careful, Tune.”


    “I know, I know.”


    Aster raised her eyebrows.


    “Look, ignorance can be just as dangerous as trying to find out new things. I’ll try to be smart about it.”


    “Be smart about your flagrant recklessness?”


    “Mhm, you get it.”


    Finally, they heard voices echoing ahead. Aster sped up, maybe unconsciously, then slowed down as they got closer to the voices, straining to hear.


    Tune closed their eyes briefly, trying to make out the voices. They didn’t know the voices nearly as well as Aster did, though, so they’d let her make the final call.


    “It’s them,” she said softly, visibly relaxing. She sped up a little again, but took more care than she had before. Probably thinking of the fall earlier.


    Tune followed her like a shadow, apprehensive now that they were actually getting close. Vague, unbidden images flashed through their mind of different ways they could end up being attacked by coming with her.


    I already weighed this. The potential benefits outweigh the likely risks.


    That didn’t completely stave off their urge to run.


    “Dad!” Aster rushed toward him. Fennel turned, his expression first one of surprise, then relief. He moved to meet her and pulled her into a hug, which she returned. There was a pause.


    "I''m sorry, I''m so so-"


    Fennel let out a held breath. "That''s not what I named you."


    "Wh- ''Sorry''?" She pulled back, incredulous, then let out a short laugh.


    He smiled. “You’re here now. That’s what matters.”


    “Yeah... Okay.” Aster didn’t look quite as comforted as she wanted to be by that, but she turned back toward Tune while  addressing the group. “Okay, um... just, hear me out before you make any judgements, okay?”


    Tune held their breath.


    “I... met a Shade that’s willing and able to negotiate. They seem just as much a person as any of us.”


    Tune raised a hand. “Yeah, that’s me. I call myself Tune.”