chapter 43


    As the sun is beaming in my eyes, I have no way of escaping it. Ie to the exception that it is just


    time to wake up. As I sit up in bed and I reached my arms out to stretch. I then notice Landon is still


    sleeping. I''m surprised that he stayed over. I can''t help but stare at him, he is so handsome. I want to


    just snuggle into his smoking hot body, but I decide to get a shower instead. I Want to look my best


    when he wakes up.


    I try to get out of bed as discreetly as possible, so I do not wake him. I tiptoe to the bathroom, trying not


    to make a lot of noise. I then shut the bathroom door, letting out a breath, knowing I can breathe now.


    Landon has been so stressed out with all that has been happening, allowing him to rest awhile longer


    won''t hurt anything.


    I then walk over to the shower and turn the water on until I get it to the perfect temperature. I then begin


    to undress as I look in the mirror. I see my growing stomach realizing I''m going to be a mother soon. I


    am terrified that I''m going to be a terrible mother. I even forget I''m pregnant sometimes, how am I going


    to be able to take care of a baby. I''m not sure how everything is going to even work out.


    I never wanted to be a mother this young, but sometimes you''re not given the option of what you want.


    I just hope that I don''t suck at it. I am scared that I won''t be as great as my mother was. She was so


    amazing and always knew what to do, what to say.


    As steam begins to cover the mirror, I then remember I came in here to shower. I got lost in my


    thoughts, worrying, will I be good enough? I know that there are going to be challenges, hoping I will be


    able to conquer them alone? Will I be able to put my child first no matter the cost?


    As I go to turn around, I jump as I see Landon standing in the doorway. “You are so beautiful, Lilly, I


    wish you could see what I see when I look at you.”


    As I''m standing there naked, I can''t help but feel a little insecure. Landon''s body is like a brick of


    muscle, he is so sexy, way better looking than me. I smiled at him, “you scared me, would you like to


    join me for a shower."


    “There''s nothing more that I would want to do, but I have to go check on Jayden. I left him with my


    housekeeper, she said she''d watch him for the night, but I think it''s time for me to go,, will youe


    overter.”?


    “Of course I will get a shower and I wille over, maybe you can make me some breakfast.”


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    “I would love to make you breakfast, what would you like?"


    “I don''t care what you make, but I would love some bacon, anything with bacon sounds awesome.”


    “Alright, that sounds great, let''s say I will see you in an hour.”


    “Perfect, that gives me plenty of time to get a shower and to get ready. I will see you soon.”


    As he walks over to me, I be nervous being all naked in front of him. He then puts his lips gently


    against mine as he kisses me. I then feel his hand travel down my body as he grips on to my ass. My


    body begins to go crazy for him. As I watch him walk out the door, I want to stop him. So, I can have


    him fuck me hard. Give me exactly what he has made me crave.


    As I watch him shut the door I''m disappointed, but wanting to be satisfied I begin to think of him as my


    hands travel over my body. I grab my breast with one hand as I begin touching my pussy with the other.


    I begin letting soft moans out, not being able to stop myself from wanting the pleasure I desire. As I


    imagine all the things that I desire Landon to do to me as I''m getting ready to cum I scream out “Yes


    Ivan yes, please don''t stop.”


    I instantly stop and don''t even get my release what the fuck I said, Ivan no. I don''t love him, I don''t want


    to be with him. Why would I scream out his name, fuck? I be frustrated and I finish washing


    myself. As I finish up, I rinse off and then shut the water off. I step out, grab my towel to dry myself, I


    be angry at myself. Why must Ivane into my head, damn it?


    I hear a voice and realize it''s star. “Lilly, he is our mate, you can''t help the feeling that you feel for him, it


    justes natural.”


    “Star, I don''t love him like I love Landon. I don''t want to be with Ivan, I want to be with Landon.”


    “That maybe so, but you have a child with Ivan, and he is your mate. So, Ivan will always be there.”


    Damn it, I know that Star is right, but I don''t know what to do. I will settle this another time right now. I


    need to get dressed, and before I''mte for breakfast with Landon and Jayden.


    “Lilly, I know that you don''t want to think about it, but you''re going to have to. In the next 2 months, you


    be a mother. For some reason, we are connected to both Ivan and Landon. I am connected to


    their wolf, and you are connected to their human. No matter our decision, we''re going to be hurt.”


    I want to ignore Star, but I know she''s right. I don''t respond to her, I just don''t want to think about it. I go


    into my closet and I pick out clothes to wear. A pick out a pair of blue jeans and a purple T-shirt. When I


    go to put the jeans on, I realize that they are too small. As I look through the closet to find something,


    all I can find is a pair of leggings. They are tight, but they will do it for now.


    As I look into the mirror and I see my belly hanging over my pants, I hate it. There is no hiding this


    pregnancy any longer. I sigh in irritation now, just feeling h and not looking forward to breakfast. I


    hurry and put my shoes on and rush out the door.


    Finding it odd that there are no pack members out and about. Shocked how things have changed so


    much since the attack. Wondering how long will it take for things to get back to normal? Hoping


    someday there will be joy once again.


    As I get to Landon''s house I knock and Jaydenes running up to me as he puts his little arms


    around me, “I missed you so much Lilly, I was so excited when daddy said you wereing over for


    breakfast.”


    “I missed you too, Jayden.”


    ''Lilly, I hope your hungry daddy has been cooking all morning.”


    “Well, it smells delicious in here. Why don''t we go and see if your daddy needs any help.”


    Jaydenes over and grabs my hand, and we walk to the kitchen together. I can''t believe all the


    trouble that Landon has gone through making us breakfast. As we approach the kitchen and I see


    Landon, he seems to be different, he actually looks happy.


    “Hey you everything smells delicious. You really have been busy, would you like some help."


    “Hey wow you''re a little early no you don''t need to help, why don''t you and Jayden go hang out for a


    little and I will yell when it''s done.”


    “Ok, well, if you need anything, just let me know.”


    I then look at Jayden and ask him, “what would you like to do until breakfast is done.”?


    Before Jayden can even respond to our surprise, Landones out, “alright breakfast is ready you


    guys can get seated.”


    As we both walk in the dining room to find our seats. I watch as Landon is serving breakfast. As he


    serves us the food, it looks so delicious as I took my first bite I''m surprised wow it''s incredible. As we all


    began to eat.


    He then pauses and looks up at me. I can see the concern on his face, knowing whatever he is about


    to say is not going to be good. Then the words that I dreade out of his mouth, “Lilly, we need to


    talk.”