I leaned back and the soft seat I was in allowed me to recline almost entirely. One hand separated my soft vulva and fingers explored the wet area between. Two fingers explored the entrance to my vagina. I fucked myself slowly and then dragged the moisture over my distended clit.


    It felt so good I couldn’t help myself, a moan slipped out and I heard Rose shift on the bed. The lust cooled some and I waited for her to either awaken or fall back to sleep. Her breathing stayed slow and deep, so I continued to y.


    Ever so slowly I rubbed my slick clit. The protruding nub gotrger as I stroked it. Images filled my head, but they were no longer ones I’d seen. Now it was my imagination and my game as I yed with myself.


    In my mind, I stood over Damien with thesh in my hand. His cries of want and frustration were music to my ears. With each stroke of my fingers I brought the flogger down over him. I warmed his chest and upper thighs, but I came just as the strips of leather pped his erect cock.


    The power felt so good as Iy recovering on the soft chair. I’d forgotten how wonderful it felt to be in charge. It had been so long since I’d been in charge of anything. Now my body, my mind, my sexual needs, and all my other needs were mine to control. I decided to test out what I could do for myself.


    I tried again to find a family that I could have some fun with. For some reason, I didn’t want to ask any of my friends. Ratru and his Brothers were cute, but asking them for sex felt wrong. Armant and his Brothers were too old and they were coworkers. Arik and his family didn’t appeal to me “that way”. Instead I introduced myself to other men, most just didn’t understand what I wanted.


    One family of men understood my overtures. They offered to mate with me for fun. I walked with them to their rooms before I decided against it. Feeling like a real human woman, I feigned a headache and left. The next day I heard they’d just found another willing partner.


    No one in the camp begrudged me my choices. The men and women here just trusted that left on my own, I’d do what was best. It was my life and I was allowed to live it how I wanted.


    I needed time to think when I wasn’t surrounded by my talkative campmates. That was hard to do in what was essentially amune. I did find one ce that I could work and think.


    There were things the men grew that tended to do better wild. Arik and his Brothers had spread berry seeds in nooks and crannies all over the protected area in front of the camp. I wandered the mountainside in the afternoon plucking the wild berries inside the defensive barrier. It gave me a chance to think without interruption.Exclusive content from N?velDrama.Org.


    I walked the sunny slope finding the elusive fruit and pondering my circumstance. This wasn’t a job the other men in the camp liked, although they liked the berries. Everyone was perfectly happy to let me have my afternoons to myself if this was my preferred activity. It gave me time.


    There were things I did like about Damien’s family. When I met other men I alwayspared them to the men I knew best. Everyone always came upcking. They didn’t have Christof’s gentleness, Kein’s fierceness, or Evan’s sense of humor. I appreciated Damien’s forthrightmand and Bane’s quiet strength. To me, Damien’s family was the perfect blend.


    There were other things, too, that I found I liked. Damien and his Brothers had tried to change when it became apparent they should. The novelty of the situation was just something they weren’t prepared for. Even now they were struggling to let go of their old teaching. The beliefs they had were deeply ingrained.


    Change was difficult for everyone on Pateria. At least Damien and his Brothers had made an attempt. The men in the camp couldn’t seem to let go of their old thinking about vers. They didn’t even give the new men a chance. Damien’s ability to adapt was unique.


    It struck me that my own actions may have made the situation worse. Damien and his Brothers had quickly trained me to do what they wanted and let them provide. Even after they had freed me I’d maintained that out of habit.


    When I thought back on it, I’d rarely been forceful in helping to lead the family. The times I was persistent, they took my feelings into ount. Honestly, I was rarely forceful with them. More than once, I’d just blithely assumed they would care for me.


    In truth, I’d known I was not taking any contraception when I’d be pregnant with Jonathan. Instead of demanding the men discuss it with me, I’d just let it continue. I’d allowed them to care for me entirely. I’d followed the ve training and not thought about the responsibilities of a free Sister.


    I sat with my basket of berries and looked up into the sunlight. In the distance I could hear men talking andughing. Birds and other creatures called out into the bright afternoon. There was no gloom here, except in my thoughts.


    Perhaps I could have told them how much they hurt me when they punished me. The morning after I had expressed some of it, but I’d buried most of it. I’d kept the dreams a secret and not really helped them understand the psychological damage they had inflicted on our rtionship.


    While I could not have stopped the corporal punishment, I could have helped them understand it was a mistake. If I’d really been honest about how scarring that experience was, they might have listened. Instead I had buried my feelings and let things go on. It was a ve’s reaction to ept their will without question. I should not have done that.


    At the end of the day, the issue was clear. I loved Damien and his Brothers, despite their past mistakes. They had forced me into performing sexually for them, but they’d never asked that Ie to love them. In the beginning I don’t think they’d even been aware I could feel this way about them. Now everything about this situation was my choice.


    There were two options really. I could ignore the way I felt and let it fade into a memory. We would share offspring, but be no closer than a divorced couple in a simr circumstance. The second option to offer Damien and his Brothers real forgiveness and a chance to do right. If I really had it in me to pardon them for their past crimes and failures we could try again. Neither option was without ws and I risked something either way.


    Several dayster, I went to the giant bathing cave in the early morning and sat beside the dryer on a warm stone. Men’s clothing was there, so I was sure Damien and his Brothers were in here somewhere.


    After many moments Damien and his Brothers moved into the light. They looked pained as they filed out of the water. I watched stoically as they dried themselves and sat in a semi-circle around me. We didn’t speak and merely sat quietly with one another.


    “You made mistakes,” I told them after a while. “I won’t tolerate those mistakes again. No one is going to beat me or force me to do things. I won’t be tricked or trained anymore. Our rtionship must be as open as the one you share with each other.”


    “We talk to Kennedy and Hannah,” Christof said softly. “They help us understand things. My Brothers and I acted dishonorably many times. We know that things are different here from what we were taught. We are learning to think differently.”


    “Pain is not a tool we should use,” Kein said bluntly. “Bringing pain is a way to train someone. We are all intelligent. If we are taught we can learn to change without pain. My Brothers and I don’t need pain, neither do you. What we did to you never should have been done, especially after we called you family.”


    “Thank you,” I said epting his understanding. “I am not as physically strong as you, but that does not give you the right to dominate me. I demand your respect and consideration in all things.”


    “We believed you weak, Sister,” Evan said solemnly. “We thought we had to protect you, but the things we did were wrong. Even if it brought you pain, you deserved the truth as we knew it. My Brothers and I were so desperate to keep you, we pushed you away.”


    I nodded and knew they were learning, finally.


    “We apologize,” Damien said, “for our wrongdoing, all of it. We wish to change and learn the new ways. All of us want you in our life, we are lonely without you.”


    Heads bowed with left arm crossing each chest the men waited for my decision.


    It was a huge choice and turning point for me and I chose to stay. My men had made mistakes, loads of them, but they were willing to change. I wanted to be with them for that. Somehow I knew I would treasure this about them as time went on.


    “Promise to respect me,” I whispered getting down on my knees in front of Damien, “and I will promise you the same.”


    I didn’t bathe with the men that morning. We hugged and kissed, promising to meet like this every day. We were family and family does not separate.


    Over the next moon, my men learned and the rtionship changed, which was good, because all sorts of things were happening.


    Rose and I both got callouses on our fingers from the hard work with Armant’s family and the time we spent outside working. The rough patches on our hands were a point of concern at first. Our families realized the patches weren’t hurting us and it was normal.


    As time went on we got more callouses, so it was good the men understood. Hannah, when she was around, insisted we be proficient with weapons. Rose and I carried our swords and were taught to use them. Much like the rest of the camp, we would be responsible for ourselves in case of attack.