Chapter 354 Despair


    Sara moved out of her sitting position andshed out at him. "What? Did I do something wrong to you?"


    Jacob was quite determined to grab the pillow from her arms, but she quickly swept his hands away.


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    He was embarrassed with how that attempt ended up, and said, "Sara, I have something to tell you.


    But promise me you won''t be angry. I need you to promise me that first."


    She felt it was something serious upon hearing him beg like that. ''What did he mean by that, some kind


    of imparity use? Now I have to be the one to promise something first?'' she thought. Her expression


    changed into a strangely aggrieved demeanor.


    "Whatever you say. I can''t promise you anything if I don''t know what you''re going to say in the first


    ce. You know what, I don''t care. But, Jacob, what''s the matter with you today? Tell me."


    She clenched her fists, and some hints of anger crept up in her. But her curiosity ovepped above all


    the faculties of her human emotion. It could be observed clearly that even Jacob was afraid and unsure


    of what he was about to say.


    However, he knew that it would take a very specific thing to make someone like Sara angry. Either way,


    she could not figure out what he was referring to. The uncertainty clouded all her suspicions and left


    her in the dark. She started to feel infuriated by that notion.


    There was something out there that she should know about, but it was annoying for her to think that it


    was nowpletely out of her control. Jacob stared at her for a good while with his usual empty eyes.


    It almost looked as if he was lost in her eyes.


    "Sara, something happened. It''s about Alice," he finally uttered. He lost his confidence almost


    immediately after observing her take a rather tough stance. He was really different now—so different


    that his most beloved woman had be his weakness.


    Back then, he could just simply ignore her feelings and do whatever he wanted to do. But he found


    himself head over heels with this woman that he''d be willing to protect her from anything that might hurt


    her.


    Perhaps this was the difference between love and being an empty shell of a man. He didn''t have time


    to heave a sigh, and he just wanted to settle this matter as soon as he could. But it seemed too difficult


    even for him.


    "What''s the matter?" Sara felt that it seemed to be something exploding in her mind all at once. The


    ringing of metaphorical tinnitus was still lingering in her ears. She slowly looked up, and keenly studied


    his face.


    He felt an ache in his heart as he saw the wary look on Sara''s face. He hadn''t seen such an expression


    from her for such a long time. At the same time, a hint of guilt rose into his heart. He was reluctant to


    tell her what exactly happened because he loved her too much to share that much burden to her. He


    couldn''t bear risking breaking her heart again.


    "Today, Alice gave me a call to tell me that she''s pregnant." He looked straight at her with a pair of


    determined eyes. He waited for her reaction.


    She stood up and angrily threw the pillow she was tightly holding in her hand. She turned to leave


    without a word. ''How could I miss something big of a news like that?'' she thought. If anything, she was


    angrier at herself. This meant that the photos that Alice had sent her before were true all along; which


    meant that Jacob not only cheated on her, but lied on her face for a long time.


    ''This was all a lie!'' she thought out loud. She felt that her head would explode in anger at any given


    moment.


    ''How could he do something like this over and over again, just to get away with it every single time?!'' At


    this point, if anyone would tell her that her life had always been a joke, she would believe them. She


    was about reaching her threshold in dealing with his mess.


    He stood up as well and ran after her and hugged her from behind. Sheshed out and tried to break


    free from his grasp, but to no avail.


    He didn''t dare to let her go.


    "Listen to me, Sara. Don''t act on impulse. I was afraid that you would get angry, so I didn''t bother telling


    you about it. But please calm down."


    He felt that his initial idea that he could manage to persuade her to calm down seemed to have been


    proven impossible now.


    "Let go of me! Are you trying to put the me on me, now?! Jacob, you have to start learning how to


    take responsibility for your own actions! I don''t care, and I don''t have to care! Either way, we still


    haven''t officiated our marriage yet, so you two can be together again."


    Her statement was covered with a sly tone of her voice. She felt disgusted by the news. Hell, she felt


    disgusted even picturing Alice in her head. To make matters worse, Alice was pregnant with his child


    now. Of course, he didn''t tell her that.


    ''You think I''m stupid or something?!'' she thought. She had seen the photos that Alice sent her before.


    No matter how Jacob kept insisting that he remembered nothing about that night, it didn''t mean that


    nothing actually happened, and that they could just forget about it and move on.


    Her mind was in total mess. If she couldn''t be with Jacob, then she''d be left with a meaningless life.


    ''Didn''t God help people achieve happiness? Howe I''ve only received pain and suffering?'' Her


    thoughts wandered off on and on.


    The anger she feltpelled her to push him away as best as she could. She would never let herself


    get dragged into this mess. No matter in what approach he chose to tell her about it, she was nothing


    but an observer, and that meant she was more or less a powerless individual.


    She was nothing but an angry bystander, and this fact was more than enough to crush her heart. Did


    this mean she deserved to be deliberately hurt?


    Such a notionpletely changed Sara. Although her life seemed to be nothing of significant now, she


    must try all she could to make it count, at the very least.


    However, she knew the peace she would have could notst long. The past would always find its way


    to resurface in the future, haunting her like a ghost creeping in the dark.


    Jacob tried his best to say the news in a gentle way. "I really have no idea what happened that day,


    Sara," he exined further. "I remember absolutely nothing after she drugged me. So, please calm


    down. We can talk about it."


    She looked at him with a rather cold and intimidating eyes. However, her face was now calm. "That''s it.


    I have nothing to say to you. Do whatever you want. If you can''t handle it well on your own, don''t go


    bothering me about it."


    He was emotionally smart enough to understand the deep despair she felt in her heart. However, he


    could never fathom the exact depth of that despair.


    After experiencing so much emotional baggage herself, Sara had thought that the bitterness would


    come to an end, but she had no idea what was about toe to her life. Everything was only the


    beginning.


    "Sara… Can''t you just please calm down? Didn''t you know how much I care about you from the bottom


    of my heart? Sara, I need you to tell me what you think about me. Can''t you feel my love for you?"


    He couldn''t help but reciprocate her intimidating response when he heard her talk back to him in that


    manner. Meanwhile, James was in his bedroom when he heard themotion outside between the


    two. Despite that, he didn''t bother opening the door to see what was going on.


    Jacob finally let go of Sara to question her himself. It was such a bold action, but he just wanted to


    cover up his fear by increasing his voice. Almost like he did it out of reflex.


    "Jacob, a louder voice won''t solve your problem. Let me ask you, what are you going to do with this


    matter? If it''s proven that the child is yours, what are you going to do?"


    She looked straight at him with her bright, spiteful eyes. For a moment there, he was frozen in ce.


    He just wanted to have a fruitful talk with her, but it seemed that there was no way back once she


    started firing her flurry of words at him.


    He thought initially that he could somehow convince her to have a discussion as soon as they both


    calmed down. But now it seemed impossible, and he just couldn''t find a room for negotiation.


    "Sara, trust me. I would willingly ept the responsibility. And if it was proven to be indeed mine, we


    can just ask Alice to have it aborted. If she insists on raising the child, I will only pay for child support."


    He rested his hands on his pockets, and he was now back to his usual calm andposed self.


    However, his reply only further infuriated her.


    "Abortion? What are you talking about? Did you alsoe up with that idea before? Jacob, how


    heartless can you be? The child didn''t do something wrong to deserve such a fate! If you don''t want a


    kid, then you should''ve thought about being more careful before!"


    She caressed her belly unconsciously as tears started streaming down her face. ''Did he think of the


    same thing when he pushed me down the stairs?'' she thought.