Chapter 86: Gratitude


    How dismal...


    All of my memories of Garett are from my first life, and not one of them are flowery.


    My memories with Garett from my first life consist of mostly our arguments, him ying pranks on me,


    stomping on my feet to near destruction, and screaming insults at me with spit flying into my face.


    ording to the nurse, she said that this Garett has been by my side the longest, so an investigation


    was needed in order to recover my lost memories.


    Charlotte and Grace picked me up from the hospital when it came to discharging me.


    Both of them were so very helpful. They told me about the sses I had been taking and gave me my


    well written notes whenever I needed a refresh on my studies. When it came to swordsmanship


    studies, I was surprised by my own strength and got a little too excited and waved the sword all over


    the ce so much that others thought of me as a human windmill and unintentionally created a new fad


    of moving the arms like windmill as new way to stretch.


    I thought that I would struggle at having conversations with my ssmates the most...


    When a girl in front of me dropped her handkerchief, I picked it up and dusted it off before handing it


    back to her.


    "Lady Arielle picked up my handkerchief for me!" the girl squealed.


    "Keep it as an ancestral item!" her friend said.


    I could only smile in return.


    It was then that I learned that the present me was apparently an idol of worship...


    I received special treatment when I became Queen but never anything of this scale. Even the usually


    stiff environment in the school suddenly started appearing warmer and more colorful than my memories


    of where everyone was mindful of each other and just thought about themselves. I never thought that I


    would see other people willing to help others even though they would receive no benefit in return.


    It was as if everyone began rxing...


    Did me staying by Garett''s side make me and the past change this much?


    When I arrived at my dorm room for the very first time since my release from the hospital, I had all the


    answers I needed. My room was filled with various soft toys and gifts that I would never buy myself


    because I always tried to maintain a Noble image of myself. I could just tell that not one of those gifts


    were from Erik himself. As I was surrounded with items from Garett, I felt a hole in my heart slowly


    growing bigger.


    For whatever reason, I kept looking for him almost as if I was chasing after his ghost. It was then I


    realized that I could never probably find him because he was most likely avoiding me.


    It soon came to Graduation Day for the graduating seniors. The ceremony was held outside


    underneath the blooming cherry blossoms and scattering petals.


    The teachers all wore ck robes while the graduating ss wore bright red robes and hats. It was a


    mandatory event, so every graduating student had to attend. I sat with Charlotte and Grace on the cold


    stone steps with the other families who were all here to celebrate the graduating ss.


    It did not even take me more than one minute to find him since he was the one giving out a speech as


    ss valedictorian with a golden tassel and white sash around his neck.


    The scene was different. In my past memories, it was supposed to be Erik standing there and giving a


    speech. I always wondered why Erik was ss valedictorian even though Garett clearly had higher


    intelligence in every way that Erik did not have. Despite the strange situation, the scene felt oddly right


    when he stood there and gave a speech with a clear and beautiful voice as if that spot was meant to be


    owned by him.


    After the speech, everyone including the graduating ss was allowed to move about.


    I ambushed Garett with a bouquet of flowers when he came down from the stage.


    "Pink roses?" Garett said with widened surprised eyes.


    I chose pink roses because they expressed ''gratitude'' in thenguage of flowers. I figured that these


    would be better than saying ''I''m sorry'' all of the time.


    "...Congrattions on graduating," I said awkwardly.


    "...You have caught me," he said with an awkward smile as he epted the roses.


    He did not seem to be angry or panicked that I caught him as he was leaving the stage, rather he


    seemed glum and a little skinnier than before. Even his hair was different. The long hair that trailed


    down the back of his neck was cut short and revealed his pale neck.


    I felt restless seeing his neck because it reminded me of that day when his neck was not connected...


    Garett and I went to a nearby bench to sit in the Academy square that was empty from all of the


    students being at Graduation with their friends and family.


    "Is it alright to be with me rather than with your family?" I asked.


    "I heard that you do not remember me...It seems that you still do not have any memories of me," Garett


    said.


    "Did I say something wrong?" I asked.


    "No, it is not your fault that you do not remember...I don''t have any parents or family that care for me,"


    Garett said with a solemn gaze.


    ...I identally stepped on a touchy subject.


    Wait...Garett is Prince Erik''s cousin.


    Why would he say that he does not have family that cares for him?


    "Garett...I am sorry about that day in the hospital," I apologized.


    "I already heard your apology before. If it bothered me, I would have said so," Garett said frigidly.


    "...I called you a fake and an imposter," I said.


    How can you be fine with what I said?


    "Yeah...but that is not a lie," Garett said.


    "Pardon?" I said.


    "I am a fake and imposter as you have said, so there is no need for an apology. If that is all, then I am


    leaving," Garett said as he shuffled his robes and stood up.


    I stood up and grabbed his wrist.


    "Answer me truthfully then...What am I to you?" I asked.


    "We were lovers," Garett said in a small voice.


    My heart thumped a little faster. It almost seemed as if that was the answer I was looking for.


    "...Lovers?"


    "Let me say it again. We were lovers," Garett said with a slightly pricklier tone.


    I soon felt an unkind gaze on me.


    "Why..."


    Why is he ring at me?


    "Not once but many times...you have chosen someone else over me," Garett said coldly.


    Someone else?


    Erik''s face popped into my mind.


    "That is..."


    "What? Cat got your tongue? You cannot deny that I was always your second priority. What we had


    was indeed a rtionship, but it was all fake. You suggested that we be fake lovers so that you


    could tease your fiancé. By making me your fake lover, you could drive your fiancé mad with jealousy


    and make himpletely yours," Garett said.


    "Why would I do such a thing?" I asked.


    "Who knows? The you right now is much better than the selfish girl you were before," Garett said.


    "If I was such a selfish person, why did you agree to be my fake lover?" I asked.


    "We both had something we wanted. You wanted a fake lover who could drive your fiancé mad with


    jealousy, and I agreed because I hopelessly liked a selfish girl like you," Garett said.


    "What merit is there to follow the whims of a selfish girl who does not love you?" I asked.


    "...I could be near you. You, who had a fiancé, let me be near you because I could serve a purpose for


    you. It took me so long for me to realize that I was foolish. I hoped that you would turn towards me, but


    you never once did," Garett said coldly.


    "...Was our rtionship really that superficial?" I asked.


    "I can show you proof right now," Garett said.


    "What proof?" I asked.


    Content bel0ngs to N?vel(D)r/a/ma.Org.


    "...You have never once told me those three simple words," Garett said.


    He did not seem like he was lying, nor did my body seem to believe that it was a lie either.


    I never once told this person that I loved him.


    Even if I could say the words right now, it would not feel right since I do not have any memories of the


    current Garett.


    "I like you...I love you...I want to be with you..."


    Such happy words sound so sad when they areing out from his mouth.


    "Why do you sound so sad?" I asked.


    "...These are now all words that I havee to hate because of you. All of what I have once felt for you


    before has equally turned into hate...Now, I can barely stand to look at you," Garett said cruelly.


    My heart felt like paper that was slowly being ripped into several pieces every time he sent me daggers


    with his words.


    "Stop..."


    I do not want to hear the rest...


    "Let''s make it simple and clean for the both of us before we make things more difficult and...breakup,"


    Garett said.


    Those were oddly the words that I wanted to hear the least.


    As I stood there trying to collect my thoughts, I realized that...I had been dumped.