For the first time in a long time, I visit a temple in the south. I''m looking for answers, whether they are in the form of prayer or somewhere in their small library. I need to find more affirmation on why Xanlos has a hold on the gods from intervening. Maybe there is a book I have yet to find the information in. If there isn''t one, I might have to summon the Three Lights.


    The temple has a strict rule of antitheft. Accessing the library requires an assistant to follow me around. I tell him to the back end of the library that focuses on Kromagia''s ancient history.


    "These are our new editions written by the churches in our kingdom," he says. "Is there anything particular you''re looking for besides our history?" The spines of the books are engraved with a swirling gold pattern. Each book is wrapped in dark brown leather, and the pages are made of thin metal sheets.


    "I''m trying to figure out Xanlos''s way of thinking."


    "On what?"


    "Something that''s probably not well known."


    "Oh?"


    "I want to know what he thinks about his gods," I say, gently opening to the first page.


    "Ah!" He says, pointing his finger to the ceiling. "His pantheon of female deities."


    "His what?" I say a bit too loud. My voice echoes in the room. "What are you talking about?"


    "You don''t know? Wait here." He walks past me and goes around the corner to the other side of the bookshelves. "Here it is! Come here!" I rush to the other side and find him halfway down the aisle, holding a book. He gently flips through some pages before stopping on the second chapter. The page has a colorful and detailed illustration of ten women around a man.


    "Is this all of them?"


    "No. There are a lot more. These are just a few well-known ones." I recognize Coretha. She''s the only one on the page who has two different skin tones of different colors.


    "What about these women?"


    "They are called The Three Lights. Stra-"


    "Stratus, Sinara, and Anasha. I''ve met them."


    While he''s looking at me weirdly, I flip through the book and skim for anything that stands out. The next two chapters focus on Coretha''s purpose and her interactions within the lower realm. It mentions the former goddess of peace, Phopasis. Just like the beginning of the second chapter, this chapter has a depiction. But this one is special. Phopasis stands next to an unusual-looking Zadione. They''re twins. Zadione looks nothing like herself. Her hair is black, long, and curly, and her eyes are black. Her sister is blonde yet taller. She has curly hair too, but yellow eyes.


    "You look bothered, sir. Is everything all right?" The assistant says.


    "I''m fine," I say and smile. "I just need to study a lot of history."


    The assistant entrusts me to handle the books with care while I spend hours examining Kromagian history. The day turns into night. Most of the worshippers are gone. The people who tend to the cleaning or maintenance of the church begin their night shift. I let myself out so I won''t get in their way. As I''m walking out of the door, three women in the middle of the street wearing black cloaks approach me. I reach for my dagger, thinking I''m about to get attacked, when the shortest one pulls her head down.


    "We come in peace, Kaioson!" Anasha says.


    "Anasha?" I say, then look at my surroundings. The world isn''t frozen. People continue walking,g and the ambient night remains undisturbed. "What are you ladies doing here?"


    "We''ve come to talk," Sinara says.


    "In private," Stratus talks softly. "Do you know a place we can conversate?" The first thing that comes to mind is my home but that''s too far.


    "Follow me." I take them to an inn, Ulrika, and I are staying in. She''s sitting at a table with her head down next to two steaming bowls of soup. The sound of boards creaking under me makes her jump.


    "Just in time," Ulrika says and yawns. "I just finished cooking."


    "Smells good," Anasha says.


    "Who was that?" I step inside and hold the door open for the women to come in. "Oh, it''s you three," she says like she''s not surprised but a bit annoyed. "Is this why you were gone for so many hours, Kaio?"


    "No. I was reading," I say. She doesn''t look too happy about my response. "What?"


    "Eat," she says and slides my chair out with her foot. "What are you three doing here? Are you trying to convince my man to do something?"


    "Nothing of the sort," Stratus says.


    "Uh-huh," she says, looking at me briefly.


    "May we sit?" Ulrika doesn''t say anything. She quietly sips on her soup.


    "Please," I say, directing Stratus to take the open seat across from me. Sinara pulls out the last seat for Anasha to sit in. She levitates beside her with her legs crisscrossed. "It''s been a while since we last spoke. Why are you all here?"


    "My sister says you''ve been reading a lot of history," Sinara says with her right hand open, aiming at Anasha. "You seek specific answers, yes?"


    "That''s correct." She slowly looks over her left shoulder where the door is. It unlocks without anyone touching it. Ulrika jumps out of her seat and pulls her dagger out. I react the same way the moment I see hands wrap around the door. The door stops short.


    "Who goes there?" Ulrika says.


    "Everyone, calm down," Sinara says. "Why are you two so jumpy?" Ulrika doesn''t let her guard down. When the door opens further, she tenses more.


    "Forgive me, child," a woman with a calming voice says. "I didn''t mean to startle you so greatly."


    "Who are you?" Ulrika says as the air in the room starts to rile up.


    "I am Phopasis," she says. She swings the door open wide enough for me to see her. She''s a damn near spitting resemblance to Zadione just like the book''s depiction.


    This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.


    "Hello, sister!" Anasha says. Phopasis leans around the door and waves at her. "I''m glad you came."


    "May I come in?"


    "No," Ulrika says as I say yes.


    "Ulrika?" I say.


    "She looks exactly like Zadione! What if she''s lying? What if she-"


    "I am not my sister," Phopasis says and steps inside the room. She stands straight. The bottom of her chin is higher than the door frame. I have to tilt my head back to see her face.


    "I don''t believe you."


    "Ulrika," Stratus sighs. "That''s Zadione sister."


    "Prove it."


    "How can she?" Ulrika examines Phopasis and the checks around the room. "With that." She points her head at our swords. I immediately know what she wants to see.


    "How does a pile of swords prove I''m not her?" Phopasis says. My sword floats to her by a mental command. Ulrika tells her to wield the sword. Phopasis doesn''t grab it. Ulrika sternly advises her to take the sword. Phopasis carefully draws my sword with her left hand and points it to the ground.


    "Now what?"


    "Squeeze the blade." All of the sisters gasp and tell Phopasis not to hurt herself. "If she doesn''t, then she can leave."


    "Do you want me to cut myself?" We remain silent. "This is barbaric. There must be another way that doesn''t involve hurting myself."


    "You must do it," I say. "Squeeze the blade."


    "I hope your magic is good in this realm. I hate feeling pain." It takes her five attempts to touch the blade. The moment she does, she says, "It''s dull." She taps the top of the blade with her finger, including the tip. "You want me to squeeze this dull blade?"


    "You passed," Ulrika says, taking my sword away from her then comes close to me. "Do you trust her?" She whispers. I nod.


    "Passed what exactly?"


    "Never mind that. I do have questions. A lot of them," I say.


    "So, ask away," Sinara says.


    There''s one big question I have. After seeing Phopasis, I''m curious to know the aftermath of Zadione''s fall from grace. If I recall, they lost their roles. Yet she''s the one who remains in the higher realm. The more I ponder, the more questions I add. I need answers before I overwhelm my mind with too many queries.


    "What happened after Zadione was banished?" I say. Phopasis looks directly at Sinara. "Excuse me," I say, cutting off Sinara from answering. "I want to hear it from Phopasis."


    "Um," Phopasis says, soothing her arm. "Sister caused an uproar after she left."


    "A very big one," Anasha says.


    "A strict rule was enacted. Any mishap in our roles, we were removed and replaced." Sinara, Stratus, and Anasha shake their heads. The mood I''m getting from them isn''t a good one. They''re all showing some sort of disdain or sadness.


    "One error and you are fired?" Ulrika says. Everyone nods. "You''re gods. How can you screw up?" I don''t say anything, but I''m curious to know the answer. These beings are revered more than Kromagians. There are countless statues, churches, books, and songs praising them.


    "We are not flawless," Anasha says.


    "Have there been others who lost their roles since the new rule?" I say.


    "One," she says, holding one finger up. "Coretha."


    "Sounds to me like you all have been flawless." Sinara disagrees. When Ulrika challenges her, Sinara becomes tight-lipped. "What''s wrong? Am I right?" Anasha puts her hand over her lips to soften her words. She admits to being faithful to Xanlos''s order but finds it hard to stand aside while Zadione wages war on us. Many goddesses want to lend their aid, but the rule keeps them back.


    "The ones that are afraid need to be courageous," I say. "We are losing here."


    "Do you know what will happen if they do?" Sinara says.


    "Same thing that happened with Coretha?"


    "Yes," she nods. "We were created to manage everyone in this realm. Can you imagine losing your purpose? It is a severe punishment."


    "Coretha seemed to be doing well," Ulrika says nonchalantly. "I think this so-called punishment isn''t the worst thing he can do."


    "Imagine if you will," Phopasis says, approaching Ulrika with her palms out to her.


    The example Phopasis provides is about a warrior family. All the father wants from his son is to be a warrior like him. He worships his father and obeys everything he asks of him. Every day the boy trains and fights. But one day he skips a day or two. When the father gets word of his son''s inconsistencies, he stops his training and doesn''t take him out to fight. The boy has become unless in the father''s eyes.


    "The standards are high," I say.


    "I think it''s worth it," Ulrika says. "All of you are about to lose the world you help maintain." Everyone goes silent. They can''t even look at her as they ponder. Ulrika looks at me, rolls her eyes, and resumes eating her dinner.


    "Child, what is your name?" Phopasis asks gently.


    "Ulrika," she says while eating.


    "Ulrika, I think it is worth it too. What say you, sisters?" Anasha and Stratus simultaneously look at Stratus.


    "I..." Stratus says as a war horn rattles the room.


    "Uh no... Kaio?" Ulrika says.


    "Let me listen," I say. The code pattern signifies the northern tribes are at war. After the code ends, three more come. My heart sinks into my stomach. I feel suddenly ill and on the verge of a panic attack.


    "Kaio, what''s happening?"


    "All sides of Kromagia are being attacked."


    "Oh no!" Phopasis says. "What are we going to do?"


    "First, we need to head back to the high realm," Sinara says.


    "But I said I would help them."


    "Now is not the time," she says, standing out from levitating. "Sisters," she says sternly. "Leave." Stratus is the first person to vanish. Anasha doesn''t at first. She shakes her head, refusing to leave. "Please," she says and then whispers something in her ear. Anasha disappears after giving me a worried gaze. "Phopasis, come. Don''t make me force you."


    "Why are you abandoning us again?" Ulrika says.


    "We are not," she says slowly as if trying to keep from yelling. "We can''t be here for too long."


    "Some help you are," she mumbles, crossing her arms. "The gods are nothing but cowards." Sinara and Phopasis return to the higher realm without saying a word. "Unbelievable."


    "You took the words right out of my mouth."


    "What are we going to do?"


    "The thing we''ve planned to do."


    "Right now?"


    "No," I say, looking at my bowl of food. I cup my hands around it to warm it up again. "We''re not soldiers, my love," I say, cracking a smirk. "No one is calling us to serve but us."


    "That''s true."


    "I won''t fight them until we''re ready."


    "You shouldn''t wait on me," she says, smirking. "I''ve prepared myself mentally for anything to come."


    "I don''t believe you." The moment her smile goes away, I say, "You loathe it." She looks at her bowl, scoffs, and eats all her food.


    "I''m going to meditate." Her words don''t dawn on me until after she''s gone to the bedroom and I finish my food. She isn''t known to meditate. I''m the one who does it, but it has been a while. This war nearly makes it impossible to relax. Not even sleeping works.


    I stay in the kitchen to meditate alone. The peaceful world within my mindscape is a sight for sore eyes. I miss seeing the open grasslands. For once in a long time, I feel calm. Some time goes by when a sudden disturbance nearly takes me out of reality. I open my eyes and look to my left. There''s no one there. The sensation doesn''t go away. I close my eyes and open them to reality. Ulrika is watching me from the bedroom doorway.


    "Are you going to sit there all night?" Ulrika says.


    "No. I''m done. Do you need something?" She curls her index finger, inviting me to something she won''t say. I accept her invitation. The second I get in arm''s reach, she puts her hand down.


    "I''ve been thinking," she whispers, holding herself. "About what could come after us in this shitty war."


    "What''s that?"


    "If one of us..."


    "It won''t."


    "We have been cutting it too close, my love," she says, gnawing her teeth. "I don''t think I can take this shit anymore."


    "Stay strong."


    "Not tonight," she says as she takes a step back, shaking her head. "I need you to do something for me before we go to battle."


    "What''s that?"


    "Make love with me without our promised restriction."


    "Ulrika... No... We promised after the war ended we would-" Her silence and dead-like stare tells me there is a deep concern I need to focus on. She presses her lips in her mouth and aggressively soothes them. "What if we make it out fine? Remember what you told me?"


    "About?"


    "If you were with child, you wouldn''t be able to be by my side."


    "What am I supposed to do?" She says, resting her head on my chest.


    "Continue to be patient."


    "I can''t." Out of desperation, she strips nude. It''s messy, frantic, and uncontrolled.


    "Ulrika, stop."


    "Has war desensitized you? Does my husband no longer hunger for my body?" When I try to push her back, she puts my hand on her breast. It is extremely alarming to see her so desperate to mate. I keep my hand soft and still. "Grip it, my love," she whispers as she presses my hand. "Kaioson... please..."


    "No. I will not do this out of fear. Only out of love." My decree begins to fight within her. She stares silently. After a few seconds, she backs away and looks at the ground, frowning. I don''t want to see her sad, so I prepare myself for bed. She snaps out of her frozen state and walks over to me once I am stripped to my underwear. "Hey," I say, catching her waist as she passes me. "We''ll be okay. I made you a promise, remember?"


    "I know," she says, then moves out of my reach. She takes the side of the bed I''m usually sleeping on. I don''t question why. The night has brought too much turmoil, and I rather smother the tension between us until tomorrow.