“Mama,” she said watching the door early one morning, “can I go outside while you finish?”


    She was growing and her needs were changing. I swallowed the lump in my throat and told her to enjoy herself.


    “You get too cold outside,Mama. I can juste back here when I get hungry,” she offered politely.


    “Go, Baby,” I smiled, e back when you need to. I’ll be here.”


    She was off in a sh.


    I cleaned the bathroom like I was trying to take the stone off the walls. My hands got raw and I scrapped the flesh off my fingertips. It burned and stung, but no more than the pain I felt inside.


    Once her teeth came in, she would not need me anymore. The wild world would call to her and she would have to answer. It was a truth I couldn’t stand to face.


    She came back after I’d wrapped my hands. For some reason I couldn’t find that miraculous cream my men had. They had tucked it away somewhere.


    “What did you do to your hands,Mama?” she asked crawling onto myp.


    I sighed theatrically, “That tub in the bathroom, I’ve been trying to get it cleaner and I’m just not having any luck. I was so vicious with it this morning I cut my hands. Come eat, it’s not bad. I’ll heal.”


    She curled into myp as I held her and she took her meal quietly. Once I was drained, I could see her anxiously eyeing the door.


    “Go,” I said swatting her bottom, “stay out of the mines.”


    She was gone and I tried to clean, but it wasn’t working. I ended up just sitting and staring into the fire. It wasing so quickly, I just wasn’t prepared.


    If I’d had my wits about me I would have spent the time looking for that cream.


    “What happened?!” was what roared out of Damien’s mouth after he removed the bandages and saw my raw fingertips.


    He was furious and demanded to know what happened. Evan wanted to go tell Nu-reeh I couldn’t clean anymore. Even Kein and Christof were upset. Bane marched into the bathroom like he was going to dismantle it.


    “It’s not the bathroom’s fault,” I said exasperated at their overreaction. “I just… I just realized how fast Hannah is growing. Once her teethe in, she won’t need me anymore,” thest of iting out as a whisper as I slumped over. “She’ll be gone very soon.”


    Bane walked back out of the bathroom with the healing cream looking confused. They all appeared confused. All eyes turned to Christof and I saw him ept the responsibility to deal with this.


    “We don’t understand,” he said simply sitting beside me, “please exin.”


    I took a shuddering breath and allowed Bane to put the healing cream on them.


    “In my home world,” I exined as he worked, “a child stays with it’s mother for eighteen cycles of the sun.”


    They looked quizzically at me. That wasn’t how they tracked time. I tried a second time.All content is ? N0velDrama.Org.


    “Six of your moons cycles repeated eighteen times,” I said.


    It wasn’t exact, but it was near the right amount of time.


    “That is a really long time,” Keinmented settling on a chair.


    I nodded and continued. “I know Hannah doesn’t need that long. She would feel cramped and contained if I tried to keep her like that. It just feels so wrong to me to be preparing her to leave me now. Selfishly, I know I will miss her. To raise a child and then to never see her again…” my voice broke and I dropped my head in my hands.


    It was Christof that held me as I cried, but I felt the love from the rest of them. They did not understand, but they knew I was hurting.


    “Mama, you make too many assumptions,” the tiny voice said from the doorway. “You keep saying I have to leave you and I always said I wouldn’t.”


    I wiped my tears and tried to sit up as Hannah came to stand in front of me. “Baby, you have to go out and explore. It is what women do. They know the entire world. It isn’t right to keep you with me.”


    She stood stubbornly gazing at me. “I don’t care. I’m not really Paterian anyway. My memories are of Earth. It’s not like I’ll fit in on this even if I do go fly around,” she said gesturing flippantly. “I’d rather stay with you.”


    My maternal instincts reared their head and thetearswere gone. Hannah could not stay with me. It wasn’t appropriate and it would kill her wild spirit. I spoke with conviction.


    “The reason you don’t feel that you belong here is because you haven’t experienced enough. Nu-reeh gave me stories. This is a very interesting. You have to travel around, find Sisters, and when you are much older maybe acquire some men-”


    Hannah cut me off with a loud hiss. “I – don’t – like – men,” she said simply letting her eyes rest squarely on Damien.


    “And right now, I’m d for that, you are too young to like men,” I told her. “It’s what you’ll do, though. It is what we all do. We gather experience, build a family, and continue the species-”


    “Maybe I’m alesbian,” she interrupted, blendingEnglishand Paterian perfectly.


    She had caught me off guard and my men all looked confused at the word.


    “I don’t think they have that here…” I mused getting mired on the minor point.


    “You didn’t do that,” she insisted. “You were taken from your home and sold at a ve auction. You do not learn and grow anymore. I have your memories, Mama. This is not who you were before. On Earth, you were strong and independent. These men still keep you like apetafter they trained you like adog.”


    “No, Baby Girl,” I soothed, “this is family now. They care for me and I care for them.”


    Hannahughed a short, mirthless sound. Sharp eyes scanned the men present before settling back on me.


    “This isn’t a family the way you knew it on Earth,” she said maliciously. “These are nothusbandsorboyfriendsyou chose. You are not an equal, building a life with them. You have nowhere else to go and could not leave even if you wanted to.”


    “No, Hannah,” I argued, putting my hands up in a gesture meant to stop her, “you don’t understand-”


    “We both know what very is. For now you are fun, but what happens when their attention wanes? What would you be if they no longer wanted you? How many men did yourMomgo through?”


    In my head I counted through the stream of men that had been in my mother’s life. I never got attached to any of her boyfriends, because they came and went so quickly What would happen to me if Damien and his Brothers wanted a fresh face?


    “Mama, they think they care for you now, but we both know that could change. You live, breath, and eat at their discretion. We both know what it means to wear the status of ve. You will exist until they tire of you and then they can sell you or kill you!”


    My men all stiffened at thatment, but it didn’t stop Hannah. She was on a roll. I saw her temper start to re out of control and she spoke faster.


    “That’s why you’ve been so good to them. You’ve always acted good, so they keep you. Find what they want and provide it, right, Mama? What happens when they don’t want you anymore?! They will destroy you and I can’t stop it! How can I protect you if I’m not here?!” she screamed.


    The pain of thatst statement stopped me. All her anger, all her frustration was not directed at my men; it was directed at herself. Hannah had internalized all the fears I had, but she could escape them. I could never get away and she thought she was powerless to help me.