“I love you, Fuyuki. I’ve always loved you!” My cheeks were flushed under the sunset. We were under the swings on the playground where we first met.


    “I’m really sorry Chizuru-chan but I can’t accept your confession. I’ve always seen you as my best friend, someone whom I can confide with, but never in that way. I’m really flattered that you’ve always been into me, and I really do love you, just not in the way you want me to like you. I’m so sorry…“


    It was like my world crashed down in that moment. I kept my composure and faced her head on. “I understand. You’re into someone else, right?”


    Her cheeks were as red as a tomato. “Uhhh…”


    I couldn’t help but chuckle. I never thought that I’d see the day where Fuyuki would act like a teen in love.


    If Fuyuki likes someone else, then I’d like to support her.


    I struggled to suppress the tears that gathered in my eyes but I stood there with all my might and said, “Can we still be friends, Fuyuki.”


    I felt her warm arms being wrapped around my body. I leaned closer to her touch. “Of couse, I got scared that this would be the end, but I’m glad that you still want to be friends.” Her comforting embrace got even tighter before facing me with a warm smile. “Thanks Fuyuki, for everything…”


    And that was how my first love came to a tragic end.


    ???


    I was all alone in my room. This place that was normally a place of comfort now felt like a harsh asylum. All my suppressed emotions earlier all came crashing down. I decided to call Kashiwagi-san.


    ???


    Inside the pastel blue room was me trying to take my nightly selfies to show to my beloved Instagram followers. I became more and more frustrated when I couldn’t get my selfie to be perfect. “Ugh, my bust looks too small here! And the frills are not properly emphasized!” I took a couple more selfies that didn’t meet my standards. I then received a LINE notification. My heart skipped a beat when I read the name.


    Chizuru: “Kashiwagi-san, Fuyuki rejected me”


    My heart couldn’t help but leap in joy.


    Akane, you shouldn’t be happy about this. Your crush just got rejected. You should empathize with her instead of being happy. Now is not the time to act like a maiden in love!


    Akane: “Really?? But Fuyuki seemed to like you back… Well anyways, I’m always here for you, Takahashi-san. Whenever you need a shoulder to cry on, I’ll be there”


    I then received a notification that caught me off guard.


    Chizuru: “Can I come to your place right now???”


    My heart did a little dance. I didn’t hesitate to say yes.


    Now that Fuyuki-chan is out of the way, I don’t have to play cupid, I don’t have to help her be with someone else, I have a chance now!


    My thoughts were disrupted by a LINE message.


    Chizuru: “I’m here”


    I rushed outside. When I opened the door, there was a girl whose eyes were all puffed up. Her hair was disheveled. She was still wearing our uniform. I couldn’t help but be washed by guilt.


    Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.


    I’m being selfish again… How could you be so heartless, Akane. She clearly got rejected and all you thought about is yourself… Now be a proper friend and be there for her, don''t take advantage of her, got it?


    I didn’t know what to do so I decided to just hug her. My pajamas became damp. It didn’t ease my guilt.


    “You can stay here as long as you like. Both my parents are on a business trip.”, I comforted.


    I then ran my fingers through her hair. Her body leaned closer to me.


    Now I’m truly in heaven… Here we go again, Akane. Your role is to comfort her, not act like an idiot!


    My heart still couldn’t help but palpitate. I internally sighed. As much as I hated it, I pulled away. “We should go inside. It’s pretty chilly…”


    The selfie was completely forgotten.


    Author’s note: RIP Akane’s 100k followers


    ???


    I was inside my room feeling guilty.


    All this time, Chizuru-chan liked me and I can’t even make myself like her back despite always being there for me… I’m so selfish! Now, I’ve hurt her… Why can’t I just like her romantically? That way, she wouldn’t have gotten hurt… Is it too late to accept it?


    I took out my phone and texted Kanade. Just the thought of her made my heart warm.


    Fuyuki: “Kanade-san, can I tell you something?”


    Her reply came instantly.


    Kanade: “What’s up?”


    Fuyuki: “It’s just that my childhood best friend confessed to me. I don’t really like her back but I just feel so guilty because she’s apparently liked me for a really long time and I can’t even make myself like her back. She’s the one who’s always been there for me. Should I have just accepted her confession?”


    Kanade: “This girl I swear-”


    Her reply was immediately deleted. I felt even more guilty. Tears then started to fall. Suddenly, she sent another message


    Kanade: “Sorry about that, I was supposed to send that to my friend… I’m really sorry about that??”


    Kanade: “Anyways, there’s nothin to feel guilty with. You can’t choose who you love, and besides accepting it would break her heart more. Trust me”


    Her response gave a sense of relief. I was glad I made the right decision.


    Fuyuki: “I’m relieved. You’re right, accepting it would’ve made things way way worse. But yeah, I just wish I could reciprocate it, and not just see her as my bestie”


    Kanade: “Man you can’t do anything about that part. If anyone could just choose who they love, abusive relationships probably wouldn''t have existed because they could just stop loving someone. You also wouldn’t see people getting heartbroken”


    Fuyuki: “Thanks Kanade-san, talking to you always makes me feel better”


    Kanade: “Anytime bro. I’m just one press away, y’know?”


    I couldn’t help but chuckle at her remark. I could feel the blood rushing through my cheeks.


    Fuyuki: “Tysm, I really owe you for this”


    Kanade: “Bro you gotta stop thanking me all the time”


    Gosh I’m gonna fall for her even more…


    My cheeks were probably as red as a tomato, but I didn’t mind.


    Fuyuki: “You’re just that amazing”


    Kanade: “I don’t need flatteries, just you being okay’s enough”


    Fuyuki: “Okay I’ll stop, but seriously though, you don’t have to make that much time for me, I know you still have your manga and stuff”


    Kanade: “You mean band practice? Nah I’m free rn”


    I couldn’t help but be disappointed.


    Right… Koto-chan’s gone…


    Fuyuki: “OH MY GOSH I''M SO SORRY ABOUT THE MIX UP”


    Kanade: “Nah I don’t mind. I’m just about to sleep but it’s no big deal really. Don’t even think about apologizing a million times”


    Fuyuki: “Ah I see. Good night Kanade-san”


    Kanade: “Gn Fuyuki”


    I let out a deep sigh. I walked towards my study table and took the keychain. I held it to my chest.


    Koto-chan, wherever you are right now, I just hope you’re doing well. You may not be physically here anymore, but you’re always here inside my heart. And Kanade-san… she just looks so much like you…


    The blood came rushing again in my head.


    I wasn’t able to get a wink of sleep from thinking about me and Kanade-san’s conversation.