Chapter 260 As If It Had Been A Lifetime


    At that time, James couldn''t show a happy face. Because all these things made him rather feel


    extremely heavy. If it weren''t for his elder brother, he would have jumped into the sea without second


    thoughts, wanting desperately to end his miserable life at once.


    "After she died, I traveled to the seaside at one time. I vaguely recalled whether I was drunk that day. I


    only knew that the more I thought about it, the angrier I became. And when I finally found myself at the


    seaside, I started yelling crazily. And I didn''t know for how long I had been standing by the sea when a


    sudden urge hit me making me want to jump down directly."


    James sadly reminisced that fateful day. If it weren''t for the two strong men who suddenly sprang up


    out of nowhere, he might have surely died.


    "But I had no idea why I was suddenly hit by someone before I passed out. When I regained my


    consciousness, I was in the hospital. My elder brother was silently sitting in front of my bed. But I will


    always remember what he said. And it was what motivated me to live until today,"


    James continued. He squinted his eyes slightly reflecting that he only admired a few people in his life,


    and his elder brother was indeed one of them.


    "He firmly said that I had died once. And since he saved my life, he now had the right to decide


    whether I stayed alive or not in the future. And that he wouldn''t let me decide on my own. Now it all


    seemed to me that my brother truly saved me. Although I couldn''t help feeling lonely all the time, I


    could still say that I had a lot of fun in my life."


    Eventually, at that exact moment, James felt relieved from the tight-knot feeling gnawing him soon after


    realizing he didn''t have to live life like the way he used to. And this was way much easier than he could


    surmise. And for this reason, he came to an understanding of what he should do.


    He joined his elder brother''spany shortly. By then, not a single soul knew how powerful he


    naturally was. But even so, he earnestly showed a willingness to start from the bottom up,


    contemting that what he needed the most in his present circumstances was to change his attitude


    towards life.


    From then on, no matter how excellent and suitable those girls appeared around him and no matter


    how much they hinted or flirted with him, he just pretended to ignore them. So as time went by, no one


    dared show any affection towards him.


    In his heart and soul, the only one he truly loved was gone. He could no longer open his heart and let


    himself fall in love again with others.


    "Later, I joined the group. And I started from the lowest position, then ascended slowly to the deputy


    CEO. Sometimes, my brother made fun of me, teasing me that maybe the CEO position should be


    given to me. But I never had that desire. What I merely nned was to work hard to divert my


    attention,"


    James went on as heughed at himself, realizing how amusing histe brother was. He considered


    him such a smart person who knew even these things. So, even if his brother offered him the position,


    James would probably not ept it.


    He had learned a lesson the hard way from his previous experiences, which subsequently led him to


    have had a change of mind. Now, he no longer gave a damn about the so-called fame and fortune in


    the world. In the past, James always felt that he couldn''t slow down to rx. It was not until his beloved


    woman''s death when a realization suddenly hit him that what he couldn''t understand was his heart.


    Now that seemingly only a handful of words could easily describe what had happened in decades, a


    long sigh of relief escaped his lips. But it didn''t mean his heart was already healed.


    For a day, his heart incessantly beat faster, making him feel ufortable until his heart gradually


    became numb. He came to a point where he no longer knew what pain was and what love was.


    "Till now, every time I try to recall what transpired in the past, I always feel like it was a dream.


    Especially yesterday when my elder brother died, Ipletely thought it was only a dream. I didn''t


    expect that he would depart before me. I''ve been wondering over the years about how I would die in


    the future, but I have never realized it until now."


    Death for James was something not to be frightened of during those times. What he was more afraid of


    was the notion of having someone, who he loved deeply, forget him after his death. He was scared too


    that he would still be alone after his passing.


    It resembled a spell that continuously weighed him down, making him feel he could not escape. If it


    weren''t for his innate willfulness, he wouldn''t have been so helpless today.


    Now his only elder brother had left them. To a certain extent, James was as sad as Jacob, but he didn''t


    want to express it. If he said it out, it could sound and be construed as a joke.


    Certainly, Jacob wouldn''tugh at him just because of this, but others might do so. Besides, kindness,


    as perceived by many, is not that imperative in the world we live in.


    At that time, however, James had a clear understanding of what was going on. So he never brought


    himself to utter anything about his happiness, anger, or sorrow. No matter how excited or sad he felt at


    the spur of the moment, he would merely grab hold of these emotions and tuck them in effortlessly into


    his heart.


    He believed then that no one would sympathize with someone who didn''t know how to cherish others.


    So whatever came his way, he openly epted it, thinking he deserved it anyway.


    "I thought a lot after my brother died yesterday. Although my brother''s life is cut short, I think his life is


    more meaningful than mine. At least when he had everything, he always took time to cherish them. He


    is not like me. I only have a few things, but all I have in mind is to casually squander them as I like."


    A bitter smile now etched on his face, but ironically, he kept his emotion well hidden. He silently vowed


    that in the days toe, he would fully take up the responsibility of histe brother and continue


    supporting Jacob to move forward.


    At any rate, his life had been mapped out for him. And no matter how hard he tried, he wanted nothing


    but to strive to be happy for himself. Considerably, Jacob''s life was different. He was young and had a


    lot of opportunities.


    And even if the time came when he wouldn''t be able to help Jacob, still, he would certainly try his best


    to extend his utmost assistance to Jacob in any way he could. He would generously do this to thank his


    elder brother for saving his life and for apanying him through the years.


    Living together with his elder brother for most of his life made them equally dependent on each other.


    And it was the onlyfort James had at that time when he felt down and low. At least he had a family


    who always got his back and chose to stay with him at his darkest moment. Even though this family


    member had no blood rtionship with him, he remainedmitted and did not give up on him.


    Listening intently to James''s words, Jacob kept silent. Now, he finally understood James and where his


    gamut of emotions wasing from. And he perceived that it was somehow disgraceful to speak these


    things. Especially in today''s society, James might be regarded and perceived as a bad guy.


    But at present, there was no clear distinction between good people and bad people, so Jacob didn''t


    think that there was anything wrong with his Uncle James. On the contrary, he merely assumed that


    James was just doing what he wanted to do.


    At the very least, he was much better than a lot of people. Many people were forced to do what they


    didn''t like, but they kept themselves mum about it. Some people didn''t even dare to admit that they


    didn''t like their way of life, but oddly, they even dared to im that they lived a decent and upright life.


    Needless to say, many people acted the way they did because of their perception of the so-called life.


    They also believed that no one would listen to what life forced them to do.


    "Uncle, have you been regretting what you have done for so many years?" After a moment of


    reflection, Jacob raised his head and casually asked. He could imagine how miserable James felt. If he


    encountered such a thing, he was totally unsure that he would do better than James.


    After all, people were not born saints. And such a mistake might not be avoided in the first ce.


    "You can say that. But I gradually figured it out. Everyone has their own lives and choices, and


    sometimes the past has no redemption. So now, I can only look forward to the future. When my brother


    made that choice yesterday, I wanted to stop him at all costs. Butter, I thought that as long as he was


    happy, everything would be fine."


    Unbeknownst to Jacob, James knew that even if his elder brother had deliberately decided for it, he


    might not be happy. But in hindsight, his choice must be his real urgent thought. It was not terrible to


    die an easy death. What was appalling was that he had to make the people around him worry about


    him.


    With all the years they spent together, James grew quite familiar with his brother''s mood, so he didn''t


    stop him. Knowing that there would be some arrangements left unfinished, James spoke for his brother


    when thetter wanted to exin to him about these arrangements specifically.


    Now when he thought about it, James regretted it a little. He should have pretended not to know


    anything so that he could give some time to his brother to speak more, but he couldn''t bear to see his


    brother suffer.


    N?velDrama.Org owns this.


    So without an ounce of reluctance, James expressed those words. Now, as he pondered about it,


    maybe he was right.


    As his emotions turned heavy, Jacob found himself taking a sip of water. Indeed, it was not easy for


    everyone, and no one was easier than himself. James felt regret, and Jacob was clear about it too.


    James focused his gaze outside the window and noticed the sky was already bright. James let out a


    soft sigh as he said, "Spring ising."


    Jacob couldn''t help sighing as well. He had always hoped that the winter would soon pass. Many


    things had happened this winter. And they all felt like that they were only dreaming.


    But in reality, it was more than that. Jacob felt as if it had been a lifetime. If so many things hadn''t


    happened, he wouldn''t have left any marks on this winter.