Chapter 10.5: It Appeared V
Should<em>i</em>he<em>i</em>fail to show up, that would mean
I<em>i</em>mean, what the hell was I thinking sticking my neck out for?
Was<em>i</em>I worried about him? About that guy?
He<em>i</em>didnt strike me as a bad guy but he was only a stranger to me. For me, right it was none of my concern.
Besides, he stepped into the sea of trees voluntarily. No way I would have agreed to such an unreasonable request out of nowhere. I<em>i</em>was right to refuse.
I<em>i</em>felt pity for the young man, however, I had my own life to lead equally. Besides, if I was aware of the danger, I didnt want to be subjected to it.
On<em>i</em>top of that, the young man epted the situation.
Yeah, it<em>i</em>was fine, it was all good. I didnt particrly care.
I<em>i</em>lit up<em>i</em>my third cigarette. Regardless of how much time psed, though, my mood didnt improve. On the contrary, I was still feeling hazy. Once I started mulling over it, there was no stopping it.
<em>No, dont think about it, forget about it,</em> I tried to tell myself, but it was no use, I was bothered by it.
Damn!
I<em>i</em>pushed my cigarette into the ashtray and stuck my head to the edge of the window.
<em>Ah</em>, he<em>i</em>said, but how could he be safe?
Even<em>i</em>if his body was still alive, he was a human being in the sea of trees, and he was severely wounded. How could he return unscathed without any assistance? Whatever he was trying to do was not clear to me but he was genuinely seeking help from me. That much I could understand.
And<em>i</em>against that, I
Nheless, I couldnt deny what I had uttered. Even I was frightened.
Truth<em>i</em>be told, Icked confidence that I could offer that much help, andtely, I had be somewhat cowardly. That did not imply, though, that I did not feel more than a little sorry for letting the young man simply walk away like that.
Had<em>i</em>I been more rxed andpetent like Takenaka, I might have been able to say, Alright, Ill save you, but the fact that he sought my help was a mistake in the first ce. I figured thinking that way would alleviate some of the uneasiness I was feeling but<em>i</em>it didnt. Conversely, a twinge<em>i</em>of guilt began to re up within my chest.
[I am sorry but dont get me embroiled in anything strange.]
What<em>i</em>a jerk I was
Even<em>i</em>though I was calm andposed, I could have said something more witty to the guy who was teetering on the brink of life and<em>i</em>death. I should have done<em>i</em>so.
This<em>i</em>was no different than what I said to that person at the time The same words I spat at Hyuga when I pushed her away
Should<em>i</em>he not turn up at the convenience store tomorrow night, perhaps it would be my fault
Because<em>i</em>I didnt save him and abandoned him.
<em>Abandon.</em>
Right, of course I did.
I<em>i</em>told the guy who came to me for help to disappear and abandoned him. I only wanted to avoid getting myself in a nasty predicament.
A<em>i</em>person, I abandoned a person Just like I did with Hyuga.
She<em>i</em>asked me to believe in her, and I pushed her away. I abandoned<em>i</em>her.
The<em>i</em>same thing, it was the same turn<em>i</em>of events
The<em>i</em>words that Hyuga spewed in my dream began to circte in my mind. Did that young man bear a grudge against me too? For not trying to save<em>i</em>him.
A<em>i</em>sickening sensation, not nausea, swirled in my chest. I should have given this more<em>i</em>thought.
My<em>i</em>confusion was partly to me, so my judgment was<em>i</em>poor.
I<em>i</em>should think about it properly, no matter how perilous it may be, no matter how much I didnt want to go there.
A<em>i</em>persons life was at stake.
That<em>i</em>guy said I was the only one he could count on.
Then, if I didnt lend him a helping hand, he would
Even<em>i</em>if he was aplete stranger, dying was too grave. If I found a report on the morning news a few dayster that a body had been discovered with a familiar photo, I would be traumatized for the rest of my life. I looked at the clock and got up. It was almost midnight, and there was no time to<em>i</em>dawdle. The<em>i</em>sooner the better, no<em>i</em>doubt.
Justice<em>i</em>was<em>i</em>not something I possessed. The only thing I knew was that this wasnt something I could ignore.
Despite<em>i</em>myck of willingness to help him, I had had enough of people perishing as a result of my one remark. The image of the young man who was trapped under arge tree and desperately clinging to life shed through my mind.
Wait<em>i</em>for me
Right<em>i</em>now, I wasing to you, I!
Really! Sonny!!
In<em>i</em>any case, I needed to get a shlight, and as soon as I did, the young man, hanging upside-down from the ceiling, materialized right in front of my eyes.
Duoooooooooooooooooooooooo!?
It<em>i</em>was the customary pattern.
Hakamadaaaaaaaaaa!? Shut uppppppppppppppppp!!
After finally bowing many times to thendlord, who came upstairs again and raised their metallic voice despite it being the middle of the night, they finally let me go.
Needless<em>i</em>to say, I red at the young man who was seated around the top of my futon with his legs crumpled in a heap. Thanks to this guy, my heart nearly stopped beating over and over again.
Whats<em>i</em>going on? Exin it. I thought you were gone.
Well, I figured there might be a chance for me to be helped out, so Ive been waiting for you secretly, out of your sight.
When<em>i</em>he said, Sonny seems like a nice guy, I wished I could strangle him, but that would be impractical since he would likely slip through my fingers even if I attempted to do so now. Even though he was in a state of astral projection, he was enjoying the feeling of being a specter under these circumstances.
Now, I have<em>i</em>to ask you, are you certain you want to do this?
What?2sq
Are<em>i</em>you really going to lend me, aplete stranger, your strength? the young man asked with his arms crossed behind his head. Sonny, Im sure you understand but the sea of trees is very dangerous for ordinary people and that ce carries an aura that can bring adverse influences to people, so you might be exposed to danger. It is me who requested help, but I dont want to force you to do something you dont want to<em>i</em>do.
Youve<em>i</em>been so desperate for me to do this and now you want me to back off?
I<em>i</em>dont want to involve any ordinary people in this.
So<em>i</em>youre not an ordinary person?
From<em>i</em>all appearances, you seemed to be just like any other young man in the neighborhood.
Ill exin<em>i</em>thatter.
What<em>i</em>the hell was that?
For<em>i</em>my part, Im overly grateful, but its just too risky, you know?
Hey, we<em>i</em>dont have time to waste on this, so why dont we move on a second sooner thanter?
Thats true<em>i</em>but
What<em>i</em>was up with this guy? I told him I wasing, yet he still seemed to have something else to say.
In<em>i</em>all honesty, let me tell you the truth. I dont want to go, I desperately dont want to go. I dont want to be in the sea of trees. I would consider it if you gave me a million yen, but I doubt youd offer me a million yen, and I feel like Id be a total idiot and a loss if I did what you said. I really dont think I should go that far for aplete stranger.
Thats<em>i</em>a reasonable opinion.
But even though youre a stranger, if I dont help you, you might die, right? If I dont rescue you and you die, I will feel rather bad. Youre acting all rxed, but death is a heavy subject. Since you called out to me, your death will be an unconditional burden on me as<em>i</em>well.
Not<em>i</em>that I was afraid of being resented.
Rather, the<em>i</em>fear was that I would repeat the same mistake again.
When<em>i</em>the weight of two deaths, that of Hyuga and that of this stranger, overwhelmed me, what should I do?
S-So, you<em>i</em>were thinking so deeply Somehow, I am sorry
Dont apologize after barging in on me, damn it.
MmmNot shared on aggregator sites
I know<em>i</em>that I probably wont be much of a help, but if I find your body, I can at least call for an ambnce, thats really all I can do.
It was<em>i</em>your total mistake to show up at my doorstep because I was useless.
Even<em>i</em>so, take me with you, Im going to reopen the door now, this month is that one, you know, the month when things get strange. Enough I give up already.
Sonny!
The<em>i</em>young mans long bangs and sharply angled eyes, which were so moist that they were sickening, peered out after I heaved a heavy sigh.
What<em>i</em>a benevolent person you are! I-I am infatuated with your generosity and manliness!
Generosity? Manliness? Huh, no, I just gave it all up.
Really, youre going to search for my body together with me?
He<em>i</em>leaned forward gleefully and asked me many times, which infuriated me to the point that I struck him in the face, but he still slipped through.
Eek, so<em>i</em>it passed through you after all, huh.
Having<em>i</em>someone who is willing to help me is reassuring! Thanks a lot! Sonny! Ill never forget this favor!
The<em>i</em>young man repeated joyfully.
Perhaps<em>i</em>he<em>i</em>had been feeling hopeless. Was he intentionally concealing it with his foolish smile?
Alright! Ill entrust my<em>i</em>life to you!
Hey, hang<em>i</em>on a minute! Those<em>i</em>words were too severe! Dont entrust such a grave thing to me!
But Ill guarantee your safety! I swear<em>i</em>it!
Guarantee? You<em>i</em>cant do anything while youre in the astral projection state.
Well, basically, but Im still useful.
What? Trantor: MadHatter
Especially since youre going into the sea of trees, you probably wont make it out without me.
I<em>i</em>wondered what he was on about but we had no time for idle chitchat. Despite my deep reluctance, I had no choice but to step into the sea of trees to save a life.
After<em>i</em>a quick change of clothes, I decided to pack what I could carry in my bag. I wrapped two rolls of vinyl strings since no rope was avable and packed water, matches, and some canned goods from the cupboard as well.
A<em>i</empass, which I was pretty convinced would screw things up though my house had never been equipped with anything useful in the<em>i</em>first ce.
I<em>i</em>brought a pair of gloves, insect repellent, and, what else, a pair of shoes for ease of movement?
Its not<em>i</em>a field trip activity, you know
I<em>i</em>was already conscious of this. That<em>i</em>I was throwing myself into a lot of hassle. The more I reflected on it, the more my face scrunched up.
Oh, yeah. A<em>i</em>shlight, where was the shlight?
With<em>i</em>shaky<em>i</em>hands, I searched through the closet but couldnt find the all-important shlight.
Wasnt it in our house? A shlight.
By<em>i</em>the way, I havent heard your name yet, but whats your name?
I<em>i</em>turned<em>i</em>around and asked the young man who was lying on the futon waiting for me to get ready.
How long<em>i</em>was I going to call you you?
The<em>i</em>fact that I met you here was a coincidence. It<em>i</em>would be fine to at least ask him for his name.
When<em>i</em>I<em>i</em>said this, he nodded and got up.
It<em>i</em>was<em>i</em>at this point that he introduced himself for the first time. With<em>i</em>his mouth upturned and a grin on his face, he said
I<em>i</em>am<em>i</em>Yagumo Akane. My<em>i</em>job is exterminating evil spirits.
<em>Takeicare of me from now on. Sonny</em>
One<em>i</em>transparent arm was offered before me.
And<em>i</em>so began<em>i</em>the worst night of my life.