Chapter 112


    Being home had been the best thing for me. Back in LA, I felt so suffocated and restricted.


    We had been home all of two weeks and I could sort of feel myselfing back to normal. My body


    was still healing from the miscarriage and I was in no hurry to speed up the process.


    My therapist told me that I just needed to move with the motions of it all. There was no race for me to


    get better and I just needed to be gentle. And so I decided to be kinder to myself.


    I sat by the pool with my feet dipped in the water The warm sun beamed down on my face, warming my


    skin. I tilted my head upward to feel more of its warmth when a shadow was cast over my face.


    1 peered through my sses and saw my husband with my daily green juice that he had been making


    for me. He had be obsessed with finding natural remedies to help my body through the process. I


    hated the taste but he drank it with me so I was not too opposed to it.


    He leaned down and kissed my lips softly beforeing to sit next to me, handing me the cup, and


    clinking the sses,


    I made a face when I saw the little concoction with the froth at the top. “How many more days are we


    going to be drinking this gunk?”


    “It’s not gunk, it’s health juice. I need to make sure that you’re getting all your nutrients in, baby. So


    drink up.”


    I pinched my nose and downed the thing. He followed suit, finishing his in less than ten seconds. When


    I was done I went to get up and get something to wash out the taste but he was already holding a piece


    of gum out to me.


    “Always prepared,” I popped into my mouth with a smile. “Thank you.”


    I leaned my head on his shoulder and allowed the calm of the surroundings to wash over me. There


    was not a moment I had been here had I ever felt the roar of the storm I had left behind.


    I remember my grandmother once said that if you change the environment the flower is in you may see


    it blossom. And I think the same could be said for humans. You cannot heal from the same ce that


    poisoned you. You need to get into cleaner air so you breathe better. And I was.


    I could finally breathe and the hurt didn’t feel sopounded anymore.


    “Penny for your thoughts?” his gentle voice brushed past my cars.


    I lifted my head and ced my chin on his shoulder peering up at him. “I just feel so at peace here. I


    feel like myself again or at least a more stable version of myself.”


    “That’s good, baby.” He threaded his fingers through mine. “That’s all I ever wanted for you.”


    There was a heaviness that passed between us and I knew what it was and we needed to address it.


    We needed to clear everyst thing between us before we fully moved on.


    “I’m sorry,” this was a long overdue apology.


    “For what?”


    “For asking too much of you. I asked you to move halfway across the country and to drop everything


    and follow me to LA.”


    “I wanted to.”


    I knew he would say that.


    “Because that’s how selfless you are when ites to me. You are the same man that waited decades


    for me to finally see him, to finally see what we could be. You have always been patient with me. You


    always ced my needs above your own which meant you had to sacrifice a lot.”


    The more I spoke the more my heart drummed harder in my chest.


    “Im sorry you had to give up so much of yourself for me.”


    A loud silence covered us. Our eyes still held each other in deadlock stare but neither one of us spoke.


    I owed him this and so much more. He never deserved the way that I treated him. He never deserved


    to be uprooted the way he had. And all the other little things that followed. Us moving to LA had almost


    been our ruin and I had risked losing the most precious thing to me just so I could chase a childish


    fantasy.


    “You don’t need to apologize, baby. I wanted to do all those things and if I could go back in time I would


    do it all over again for you because that is how much you mean to me. You are worth every single


    sacrifice, Adide. I would burn this whole world down if it meant that I got to see you smile.”


    He brushed his knuckles on my cheek and yet another flurry of butterflies filled my stomach.


    “So don’t apologize for that. I would do LA a thousand times over for you because that is where you are


    meant to be for


    work.”


    Chapter !!!


    “But as “”


    He arched an eyebrow in question


    I let out a heavy breath all the pondering I had been doing over thest few days had led me to this


    thinking “I don’t know if LA is what I want anymore I don’t know if it’s something that will be good for me


    I know I have the movie but…


    “You don’t want to do the movie anymore


    “I don’t know”


    The thought of returning back to LA sent me into a frenzy. The ustrophobia and the constant


    cameras. And now with us louing the baby just as we had announced we were expecting was too much


    for me to bear


    I knew that people wanted ament my publicist had been holding me to say something or at the


    very least post something but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I wanted to stay in this little safe


    haven a little while longer. I didn’t want to have to rejoin the real world just yet


    “You don’t have to decade now you guys are on production break and you have your leave days, just


    take the time to decide. and if you need me to get you out of that contract I will have mywyers on it in


    two seconds t. You just decide what is best for you and I follow you wherever you


    “Really!”


    1 didn’t deserve this man


    “Yes baby” he cupped the side of my face and leaned in to kiss my lips softly “Even if you take us to the


    deepest pits of hell I will be right there holding your hand”


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    hips found each other again and I melted into him. Our mouths molded with each other, the fire that


    was all but a gentle me a few seconds ago igruted to a dangerously hot inferno


    He lifted me up so I sat in hasp, my hands finding their way into his hair I threaded my fingers


    through the soft locks gently pulling on them


    We were so lost in each other that we lost our bnce and fell into the pool. The cold water pulled our


    lips apart but his arms stayed safely around me. We surfaced gasping for air andughing at the same


    time.


    “That’s one way to cool me off. Adie” My husband pulled me toward him, his hands safely secure on


    my waist


    “Me That was all your fault, you were the one who put me in yourp


    “I didn’t hear youining a few seconds ago.”


    1 yfully pped his shoulder “Whatever”


    He pressed lips against mune as he held me in the water. When he pulled apart I could see all the love


    and tenderness in has face. I had always known it but in that moment it became only more apparent to


    me just how much of a light he was. I knew that as long as I had him. I would be able to face the


    roughest of storms and brave through the hardest of fires.


    “Forever and always?” I stared into his eyes.


    “Forever and always


    I didn’t know what the future held for us and I wasn’t sure if all our troubles were behind us. What I did


    know was that no matter what, we would make it through this one way or another