Warmth. So warm and peaceful.
Light. Blinding, shining light.
I feel the light on my eyelids, daring me to stay asleep. The warmth I feel on my face and body feels nice but the light is killing my sleep.
“Uhhhhhh…..go away sun………..I want to sleep..……..please, I’m tired.”
The light didn''t move. If anything it got brighter.
‘tch, I thought I left the blinds closed’
I tried to hit the light away or to hit the blinds closed with my hand. It didn''t work. My eyes were still closed. I started to scrunch them trying to get away from the light. I roll over to my other side so the light is no longer on my eyes but now warming my back. I thought that would solve the situation but it only made it worse. It seems something else is trying to wake me up. My front is now being hit with a cold wind.
‘uhhhhh….I just want to sleep...Did I leave the window open too?.....I had better not have turned the ac on last night…………….uhhh fine! I’m up you happy now?’
I open my eyes expecting to see the inside of my room, but instead I see a vast forest. My view uninterrupted for hundreds of miles. Just below my body is pure forests of green with the sun’s rays gently resting over the treetops. I open my eyes wider as the smell of the forest enters my nostrils. The view takes my breath away.
“Wow….that''s beautiful...what a nice dream…………...wait….WHAT?!?”
Without moving my body I hear rocks falling down below me. I turn my head a little and look down and I see a massive drop. I was on the edge of a cliff.
“Well….that''s new…”
I look down as the rocks from under the ledge fall to the forest below.
“Oh cool. I’m on a ledge…...wait….ledge?!”
I jump back to not fall over the edge. I whip my head around rapidly trying to see where I am and make sense of what I’m doing here. The sleep is now completely out of my system.
“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!!!??!!”
I sit up on my butt and look around me. I realize, I’m not in my room.(duh) I was now on a peninsula of rock jutting out of a mountainside with no path or road leading to it, just a jut of rock.
“WHAT THE HELL!?!?”
Then the memories start to flow in like a tsunami, crushing my mind for a few moments.
I remember everything that happened to me, all the pain, the suffering, the anger, the promise, and the time after death/or with death.
“WHAT THE FUCK DEATH!! NOT COOL!! HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO GET DOWN FROM HERE?!?”
I swear I could hear his loud annoying laughter in the back of my mind.
“I am going to kill him! I’m going to kill him. I don''t care if he is death! I’m going to kill him! This is SO not cool!!!”
I look at the mountain above me, towering like a skyscraper. It was so large and foreboding. To my left the sun was barely up above the horizon. It''s soft rays of sunlight warming my cold skin.
‘Wait…..cold skin?’
I look down at my body. I was still naked.
“REALLY!?!?!? YOU COULDN''T AT LEAST GIVE ME SOME GOD DAMN CLOTHES!! YOU JACKASS!!! THIS ISN''T FUNNY!!!”
I start to stand up and peer out over the ledges, looking for a way down. There was none. I was stuck up here, naked, and cold.
A loud grumbling echos over the trees.
“SHUT UP STOMACH!! YOU HAVE THE WORST TIMING!! UHHH!!! DEATH!! YOU LAZY ASSHOLE!!!!”
<<Yeeeeees? What’s wrong? >>Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.
“Eh?”
‘Did I just hear correctly? No must be my imagination. It must be the altitude. I’m hearing things.’
“Great. Just great! Now I’m hearing that bastard in my head when he’s not here!”
<<Well fine then. Don''t talk to me. Here I was going to help you because of a little slip up, but nooooooo. Someone likes to be a naked pervert and stranded on the side of a clif!>>
“What?!..wait...Death?!?”
<<Yo.>>
I whip my head around me looking for the source of the voice. I look down over the edge of the cliff to my right. There, appearing over the cliff, an man-ish looking thing made of and covered in darkness in the shadow of the cliffside. It was floating just off of the cliff. I couldn''t see any facial features or hair or anything. The darkness covered it''s body. The darkness almost looked like it was pulsing in him. It had arms, hands, legs, and a head but nothing else. I raised it''s hand in a waving way at me. It didn''t have a mouth but I knew it was smiling.
“WHAT THE HELL?!?! Why did you put me on the side of a cliff Death!? And WHY am I still naked?!?”
<<GOD DAMN IT!! WILL YOU PLEASE STOP SHOUTING!!! I’M RIGHT HERE YOU GOD DAMN JACKASS!!! My poor ears…..>>
This time it was my turn to hold my ears closed with my hands. His yelling was just too loud!
I start to calm down and try to talk calmly with, what I presume to be, some kind of avatar of deaths.
“uhhhh...fine...I’m sorry. Ok? I’m sorry for yelling at you when you are just trying to help me.”
In a sarcastically high pitched tone death talks back to me.
<<Awe! That''s sooo sweet! I just have to forgive you now. I mean, I don''t eve get a thank you or anything; you loud cursing, naked, perverted idiot!?>>
I roll my eyes at his stupidity.
“...uh, ya. Ok. Thank you. So can you please tell me why I am on the side of a cliff and buck naked?”
<<What? You don''t like being naked? It''s very refreshing.>>
“DEATH!!”
<<Ok. OK! Fine. Jeez. So….don''t be mad ok.>>
Death clears his throat.
<<I may have, sort of, kind of, well, acciiiidentallllllyyyy……. dropped you in the wrong spot by accident. Don''t worry thought I am here to help!>>
Death took a victory pose. I could definitely tell he was smiling.
“WHAT?!? Oh sorry. No wait I’m not sorry! How the hell did you accidentally drop me in the wrong spot?!? Does that mean I made it here? And why am I still naked?!?!”
<<Yes you did make it! Welcome to your new world! Aren''t I amazing, and it only took me a few years.>>
“Death! One thing at a time! You said you dropped me in the wrong spot but we made it to the correct world. What do you mean?!?!”
I was massaging my temples at this point of frustration.
<<oh..well….haha...You’ll laugh about this later but uh...hmmmm...well, you were naked see and I was carrying you over with a physical manifestation of a body, which you can see right now...and uhh...I was taking you over to a nice spot in the woods that I picked out with great views, nice cold water, an abundance of fruit, and leaves for shelter over there. Aren’t I nice?>>
Silence.
Death coughed into his hand.
<<And well, on the way…..I uhhh….well, my hand accidentally slipped carrying your body and hit your junk. Which was super weird by the way! And, in shock, I kind of….well dropped you. BUUUUUT look on the bright side! Good thing this ledge was here or you might have died again. Haha!>>
I try my hardest not to jump off of the ledge right then and there and punch Death in the face. Controlling my anger, I took a deep breath and I worded my words very carefully. My body physically shaking now in anger.
“Death. Just wondering.”
My anger boiling in my mind but I wasn''t letting it into my voice.
“Why didn’t you give me clothes before you carried my unconscious body over to the spot you wanted to place me at?”
<<...........................>>
A silent wind passes between us on the ledge.
<<......huh...uhhh...well….I’ve never worn clothes before so I didn''t think about that. Hahaha!>>
Death took another victory pose with his body made of darkness.
Veins started popping out of my forehead in anger, but I smile and keep a calm voice.
“So your plan was, just so I know, to leave me, in the forest, alone, unconscious, and naked.”
<<.......Well when you put it like that it does sound weird, BUT that place has all the things living people need; food, water and shelter.>>
I try to keep my tone polite.
“....Death...”
<<yes?>>
“GIVE ME SOME GODDAMN CLOTHES!!!!”
<<Owwwwww! Ok okokok! Let me get you some your majesty. Jeez. Do mortals really care that much about the way they look? It''s not like you going to keep your clothes when you die! And stop shouting at me!>>
After a few moments, the black sworling body of darkness pulled a black shirt, black pants, black socks, black boots, and a black overcoat from inside of it. Death then threw them on the ledge next to me.
<<Don''t ask me for undergarments. I am not going to give you any. You can buy some at a store in a human town later if you need them.>>
As I put the clothes on I begin to feel much more comfortable on the ledge. The clothes actually fit surprisingly well. The boots were sturdy and they had a good cushion in them for my feet. The shirt fit snugly against my body. The pants were just the right size for all my dimensions. The overcoat was lightweight but kept out the wind and the cold. All in all they were a great set of clothes. Not to mention I looked pretty good in them.
<<You done admiring yourself your majesty?>>
“You done being a jackass your deathyness?”
The sarcasm was thick between us.
<<Do you want to get down or not?>>
“Sure. Now that I am wearing clothes my junk is protected from your aggressive mid air groping.”
<<I’m leaving you up here.>>
The darkness starts to disappear from the air.
“Wait! Don''t go! I was joking! Have a sense of humor Death! How the hell am I supposed to get down from here!”
<<JUMP! Maybe your flappy junk will break the fall! I’m not even supposed to be here. I was supposed to drop you and leave. It''s out of the kindness of my heart that I was helping you at all!>>
“Oh come on! I’m sorry. I didn''t mean it. Please help me.”
<<No. This should be good for you to build up your strength. People have climbed up mountains before. Now you just have to do it in reverse!>>
“I can’t climb down this!? I’ll fall and die! I don''t even have any rope to hold on too!”
<<Then you die! You need to get stronger to get your revenge right! This world is harsh! Don''t think anyone will save you. Your on your own. But I will give you the destination I was supposed to drop you at on your map so if you can get there before dark you will have food and water. OH! And by the way, don''t forget to have fun!>>
With that Death disappeared like he had never been there at all.
“DEATH!!! YOU BASTARD!!!”