Chapter 148


    Harper


    I didn’t want to go to ke’s party, and I tried toe up with every excuse in my head to back out.


    I even ran a few of them past Sadie once I found out Easton was dead set on going.


    But each excuse I gave to my best friend, she returned with the same reply—that I was going no matter


    what, and her sassy self didn''t want to hear any more abott it.


    Anxiety ate at me all day.


    I could feel it in my hands while I was getting ready, my eye liner a wobbly line, far too thick and beyond


    repairable.


    But after that joint we smoked in the car and the electric blue punch that I''ve been sipping from ke’s


    kitchen—that probably has thirty different kinds of alcohol in it, oops, whatever—I hate to admit that I’m


    actually having fun.


    But I really am.


    ke’s game room, which is more like an arcade, is where we''ve spent most of the night.


    The boys have been battling out an epic game of beer pong, Sadie and I jumping in to partner with


    them when we''re not lost in our own war of Ms.


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    Pac—Man or bowling— because, of course ke has a bowling alley in his basement.


    And whenever we run low on drinks, ke sends one of his servers to refill our sses.


    I''ve never been to a high school party that has waiters.


    Not even Easton hires them for his ragers.


    But I’m not surprised that ke has gone all out, he doesn’t do anything half—assed.


    Even as he’s standing next to Easton, partnering with him on this round of pong, he looks perfect.


    His hair is more styled than mine.


    His outfit is so put together, I swear he uses a Stylist.


    He catches me looking at him and smiles and when he finishes the round with Easton, hees over


    to the bowling area where Sadie and I are hanging out.


    “Hey,” he says, clinking his ss against mine.


    “Having a good time?” He looks up at the TV that’s tracking our score.


    “Damn, you''re on fire.


    I didn''t realize you were that good at bowling.” “Neither did I,” I admit,ughing, watching Sadie’s ball


    head straight into the gutter, missing all the pins.


    “But this has been a st.” “A few more of those”—he nods toward my ss—“and I just might be


    getting a kiss at midnight.” “ke ...” “I’m kidding, Harper.


    We''re friends, that''s all we''ve ever been, and I know that.” “Damn it!” Sadie shouts at her second


    attempt, which turns out to be a gutter ball, too.


    “I hate this game.” “You do know I''ve only ever wanted to protect you, right?” he says when I nce at


    him again.


    “I don’t want anyone hurting you, Harper.


    The thought of that makes me fucking crazy.” “Thank you,” I whisper, feeling his words, the impact of


    each one nestling into my chest.


    “I’ve always known you''ve had my back.” That''s mostly true.


    Sure, there were times I’ve doubted him, but that''s when I''ve allowed Sadie and Easton and Aisha to


    creep into my thoughts.


    But if I went by my heart and the way it’s felt, I’ ve been team ke all the way.


    “Good.” His grin grows.


    “I''m d you feel that way and you know there isn’t anything I wouldn''t do for you.” “What am I doing


    wrong?” Sadie whines, a quick nce telling me she went for a third try, even though she technically


    isn''t supposed to.


    I giggle at Sadie who’s throwing her hands up in the air, like she’s trying to actually fight the bowling


    alley.


    But when I turn back to ke, my thoughts be more serious.


    “What you can do for me is keep Aisha tamed and make all this drama—the spray painting and the


    name calling and the WHGOSSIP posts—go away.” When I realize how silly I sound, that ke


    doesn’t have control over any of that, and I’m just venting, probably to the wrong person, I add, “I’m


    sorry.


    I know none of this is in your control, but it’s getting to be a lot.” “You don’t deserve it, Harper.


    Not a second of it.” “Then why does it keep happening? Who am I hurting so badly that they want to


    hurt me?” His stare shifts between both my eyes.


    “I wish I knew.


    I wish I could take it all away and rece it with happiness.” “Me too,” I say so softly.


    One of the servers returns with a full ss of punch and a drink for ke.


    ke grabs them off the tray and hands me mine.


    “The good news is, you''re here.


    You''reughing at Sadie”—he points to her as she attempts a fourth try and fails again, cursing at the


    lane like it can hear her—"and you''re enjoying yourself.


    It’s the start of a new year and that’s he important.


    You can’t start it off with a fucking dud of a night.” He''s right.


    This is probably thest New Year''s I''ll ever celebrate with all these guys.


    Once we go to college, everything is going to change.


    When we all return home for the holidays, who knows if we''ll all even get together.


    We could lose touch.


    We could be totally different people then.


    “Thanks for having this party,” I say.


    “I guess all these final celebrations really matter.


    Who knows how many more we''re going to have before we all part and go our separate ways.” He


    sps my shoulder and shakes it.


    “Getting nostalgic, are we?” Iugh.


    “It''s this wicked punch.


    What the hell did you put in it, anyway?” “You don''t want to know.


    But trust me when I say, go slow, because it’s going to sneak up on you and kick your ass.” “I think it


    already is.” He smiles as he gazes at me.


    “I’ve missed you, Harper.


    You’ve changed since you and Easton have gotten together.


    Not in a bad way, I don’t mean that.


    You''re just a different person now.” “How so?” He shrugs.


    “I remember that timid, insecure girl who came out into the backyard during her brother''s party, wearing


    a tiny bikini.


    He ordered you inside because he didn’t want any of his friends looking at you and you went back in


    and changed.


    Do you remember that?” That seems like a thousand years ago.


    But, of course, I couldn’t forget, that was the first time I kissed Easton.


    “What would you tell your brother now, Harper? Would you go back inside and put something else on?”


    “Fuck no.” “Exactly ...


    you''ve changed.” His eyes narrow, like he’s really seeing me.


    “But I have to say, the confidence looks really good on you.” “ke—” I stiffen, my voice cutting off


    when I feel a set of hands on my shoulders, a ce where ke had just gripped.


    But it’s not him, it’s Easton—I can tell by the feel of him, from a breeze of his cologne that hits my face.


    His hand falls to my waist, his expression telling me he’s not happy.


    “ke ...” His voice is low, gritty.


    “I know you''re not creeping up on Harper behind my back again ...”