I wake up in agony. Why do I hurt? I haven''t missed any hormone doses.


    No. It''s not that. The pain is too high up. The epicenter is set in my core not just under the skin.


    I should check anyway. It would be irritating to have to clean bedsheets after the pain dies down.


    I try to get out of bed but the pain is too much. Simply trying made my stomach turn violently and my head far too light.


    I need to get to the bathroom quickly without moving faster than a stumbling limp. I thought that if I didn''t rush I would pass out and crack my head on the floor. But if I hurried I would definitely be sick. Kneeling in front of the toilet, crying as the pain increased. I''m going a slumlord''s tenet on a dirty bathroom floor. The pain is growing. Something is rising.Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.


    Blood and bile forced their way out of my mouth and despite the pain slowly fading away I was horrified.


    I had been a very sickly child and had spent too many nights sleeping next to buckets and inside of bathrooms but never has blood played a role.


    Nothing about this was normal. The relief and peace that followed similar events before didn''t come. Instead a deep and angry exhaustion settled into my bones. Being awake for days wasn''t as exhausting. I became too tired for fear. I don''t know what is happening to me but all I care about is sleeping again. I smiled, grateful that the pain had faded to something comparable to a fresh bruise and shuffled the twelve feet back to bed