Chapter 19
PART 1 Chapter 19 — 02
de''s eyes fell upon mines once again and they looked guilty.
I didn''t know why I was feeling so shattered inside but I couldn''t ignore it.
My eyes dug into de''s for a moment longer and I realized just how familiar they are.
They stared at me with guilt and regretjust as unexined as my resurfacing hurt.
I stood up from where I was crouching and ran towards my house,hoping to leave the pain behind.
It remained with me and it seemed like the harder I pumped my feet,trying to get away from it,the faster
it chased me.
It was unexinable really,why I felt like the remaining pieces of my heart who were beginning to give
me the slightest of hope had been stepped on by no other than de Russell.
An enemy.
The son of a traitor.
The attacker of Jared and the reason he''s in the hospital.
I realized that I should bring my unidentified mate into this.
Shouldn''t I feel guilty for being in love with Jared when I had a mate already.
Shouldn''t I feel guilty for feeling things for de that I shouldn''t be able to feel for an enemy! How
desperate am I to catch feelings for someone just because they rescued me,any decent human being
would have done something to help.
Imagine the look on my father''s face as he learns his daughter is a betrayer! Imagine now I''d ruin their
reputation! But I didn''t feel guilty.
In fact,the opposite really.
I grew angry as I thought of just how messed up my life is.
I''m in love with a guy who has a mate.
I''m receiving strange feelings for an enemy,and I have a stranger mate who wont show me his identity.
Back home,I was grateful for Amanda''s and Jason''s departure.
It gave me an hour or so of studying.
Mom barged into my room,her face wrinkled with stress.
"There''s a pack meeting tonight with the enemy pack,all the adults have to go,nobody below twenty-
one.
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Will you be alright by yourself?"
"Yup,do you know what the meeting is about?"
"de Russell putting Jared in the hospital.
It''s obvious."
I nodded,my stomach flipping when she said de''s name,"
Is dad going?"
She shrugged,"
I don''t know.
I haven''t heard from him."
With that,she exited the room,leaving behind a trail of misery.
Suddenly,I felt disgusted with myself.
I had been so caught up in my own personal problems to notice that my parents might be on the verge
of divorce,Jason hates me and I probably caused Amanda some real damage.
I sighed.
I really didn''t know what was wrong with me.
My phone suddenly rang,snapping me out of my pity party.
I picked it up,the screen shing Lisa''s name.
"Hello?"
“Hey,"
she answered, get ready and meet us downstairs in five minutes."
“What? For what?"
I asked,getting up.
“Just do it.
Dress in something warm."
with that she hung up,bearing me no more exnation.
I quickly got up and dressed in some jeans,a hoodie and a sweater on top.
Lisa and John were waiting outside in a car.
“About time!"
yelled John as I entered.
Lisaughed,’ we just got here."
We drove for about ten minutes,singing along to the radio.
When we pulled up in front of the carnival,I began to jump up and down.
“Yes! I haven''t been here in so long!"
Lisa and Johnughed,watching while bouncing up and down.
We exited the car and a shadowy figure caught my eye.
“Who is that?"
I asked,creeping closer.
Lisa smirked,’ You''ll see."
The shadow figure neared us,and I recognized him by voice first.
“Hey guys,"
said Ben finally in proper eye view.
"Hey, I muttered.
For some reason I was disappointed.
I was hoping it would be someone else.
Ben stood besides me as we entered the carival,buying out tickets and cruising around to see what
rides to y.
“Let''s get on the Veggie knock out!"
yelled Lisa,bobbing up and down on her heels.
"Are you kidding? It''s for kids,"
“No,it''s fun, I said,dragging Lisa with me as we headed towards it,"
You and John get your own car.
Me and Lisa are going together."
“It''s too easy!"
yelled Ben.
“Fine,losers buy the winners a Carmel apple!"
“You''re on!"
Lisa and I entered a car,putting on our seat belts and waiting for the guys to catch up.
The ride began and all of the sudden we were speeding towards massive stic vegetables.
Me and Lisa knocked out the cucumber but the boys weren''t so lucky.
is hurt.
Then again,Jared and his pretty little girlfriend were probably making out right now,with me at thest of
their thoughts.
Yes,I deserve to have fun.
Even if it''s for one night.
Lisa served the car to the side,trying to knock out a tomato.
We missed that one,causing the boys tough.
We sped past them,knocking down some of their vegetables.
John stood up and hollered,"
That''s not fair!"
Lisa shrugged and blew kisses at him.
By the end of the ride,we had managed to knock down thirty—three vegetables,beating the boys by
eight.
Me and Lisa high—fived each other, You get to buy caramel apples!"
The boys did buy us caramel apples but they didn''t seem to mind it.
John and Lisa sat besides each other,kissing every few minutes,causing me to look down every time.
Ben cleared his throat as they were at it"
So,it''s really nice out.
I nodded,"
I love this camival."
“I''ve only ever been here once."
“Where are they?"
“At the pack meeting.
No kids allowed.
Do you know what''s gonna happen?"
Ben suddenly looked ufortable, uhh,no.
I don''t."
Confused by his strange behavior! decided to let it go and enjoy a night out with my friends.
Lisa and John finished up and after riding almost every ride there was,and winning three big teddy
bears,we decided to head home.