Chapter 30


    My neck tingled where Elias marked me. I tried to imagine how my life would be if I left and went back


    home. I would never see Elias again. That thought made me ufortable but I knew that it was just


    the mate bond. In all honesty, I had no idea what I wanted to do anymore.


    "I don''t know," I answered honestly. I held Elias'' hand in mine and yed with his fingers. I liked the


    feeling of warmth and protection I felt. I shook my head.


    "I don''t think I could leave right now. Granted, we didn''t start off the best and I miss my family like crazy,


    I don''t think I could take it if I never saw you again, ever. I don''t know if it''s the mate bond or Stockholm


    syndrome, but I don''t understand my feelings for you. And when you kissed me... I never felt a kiss like


    that before. It literally took my breath away and I didn''t want it to end, but I didn''t want to get closer to


    you either because you hurt me... and I don''t want to get hurt again," I tried to exin. His hand pulled


    out of mine and went to my cheek.


    "I''m not trying to hurt you," he assured me. I sighed and looked at the sheets before I prepared my next


    question.


    "Why was it so easy for you to sleep with her when I went into heat?" I asked quietly. His movement


    stopped before he sighed and held my hand again. He knew exactly what I was talking about.


    "Because I''d been with her before. Kendra was going to be Luna before I met you. As far as mates go,


    I thought I missed my opportunity to be with you. I thought you were dead. I''m 27 years old and I didn''t


    find you until 6 months ago. That''s not normal for Lycan. When you went into heat, I couldn''t control


    myself. I wanted you so bad... but I knew I couldn''t have you because you would hate me. Kendra


    offered... a solution, and I was too blinded by you heat to argue," he exined. I''m not going to lie...


    that hurt.


    "How am I supposed to know that you won''t do it again? I''m just going to have to hope?" I asked. I


    knew my face was probably turning red. He pulled my chin up and made me look at him.


    "Because I learn from my mistakes, and I don''t want to risk losing you again. I care about you, Novalyn.


    I love you," he said.


    I believed him... and that''s what scared me. He moved to kiss me and I turned my cheek at thest


    second.


    "Is Kendra still... do you still talk to her?" I asked. He hesitated.


    "She''s in the pack, Nova. I have no choice... plus, she''s a dear friend of mine. I''ve known her for a long


    time," he said. I felt irritated by the thought.


    "Why?" I asked automatically.


    "Nova," he sighed. I shook my head and he stopped.


    "No, don''t bother, Eli. I''m going to go to bed," I said defeatedly. Every time we would make stride,


    something brought us right back. It was tragic really because every time, I thought we were actually


    N?velDrama.Org holds ? this.


    getting somewhere. One-step forward, two steps back.