Chapter 109


    Five: Tobias


    Tobias''s P.O.V.


    This was not how I had pictured it. Having Joselin on top of me, pleasuring herself by grinding on me. I


    had wanted her for so long... even when I shouldn''t have. Even when it went against the will of the


    Goddess.


    She had always been on my mind. She had always been the most beautiful, funniest, and most brilliant


    woman I had ever met. What she was offering me was a dreame true for any man.


    "You don''t want me to seduce you?" Joselin repeated without emotion as her hips stilled and her hands


    lifted from my chest. Her body was tense, and she lifted herself up until she hovered over me.


    She looked horrified, and my grip tightened, wanting to pull her back down and show her just how


    much I was enjoying myself. But I respected her decision to stop and let her move away.


    This wasn''t what we needed. No matter how much I wanted it, it wasn''t what I needed.


    She quickly climbed off myp until she was standing in front of me. Joselin lifted her elbows as she


    wiggled her hips away from my grip, not wanting to touch me more than she already did.


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    "No. I don''t think we should fuck right now, Josie." I stood slowly, my heart hammering in my chest as


    the Goddess before me as she ced one hand on her head with a frustrated groan.


    ''I have been throwing myself at you for months. Months! I have been humiliating myself trying to get


    your attention! You should have just told me to stop if you didn''t want me. Why didn''t you say


    something?" She bent over, collecting her clothes from the ground and holding them over her exposed


    body.


    I growled lowly as she pulled her shirt on, covering her perfect, perky breasts and the curve of her


    waist.


    "I didn''t want you to stop." The admission made my cheeks feel warm, but Joselin''s re made me


    step forward tofort her. Her guard dropped, her hands stopping as she pulled her jeans back up,


    leaving her pants unbuttoned as I lifted her chin with the knuckle of my index finger.


    Her lips parted as I ran my nose across hers, our lips just barely brushing as I watched her eyes flutter


    closed. "I adore your attention, Josie."


    I let out a breath of disappointment as she pulled away, moving out of my reach and leaving me feeling


    cold and empty.


    "You adore my attention?" She spat with venom, and my eyebrows pulled together in confusion as she


    red at me.


    "Yes, your attention, your affection. All of it." I wanted all of it, all of her. But was she ready for that?


    Was I ready for that?


    I had lived a long and painful existence, only ever finding peace when I was near Joselin. That was an


    issue for me. I couldn''t expect her to solve all my problems and fight my demons. There were too many.


    So, I vowed to never put her in that position, i


    I also knew that what she wanted was far less than what I expected of her. For years, I watched as she


    used her beauty and charm to get any man or woman she wanted into her bed. It was only reasonable


    to assume that I was her next target, the next name on her list.


    She had never been in a rtionship that I knew of. She spent one night with a man and pretended


    they didn''t exist to her the next morning. I would smell her on him and him on her, but they wouldn''t


    even look at each other.


    I had even seen her join in with a couple or two asionally. Sex was not taboo for our kinds, and


    many people engaged in it in public... some were willing to invite others in and share.


    I would watch as she approached a pair in the middle of a heated moment with her head held high and


    ask them if she could join in. They would take one look at her and wee her in.


    Who wouldn''t? Even the Queen, a descendant of the moon goddess, had been jealous of Joselin.


    As terrifyingly powerful as Joselin was, she was the most beautiful creature on the. Everyone


    would stop what they were doing to watch as she joined in and came undone.


    This first time I had seen it had been burned into my brain for me to relive every night. They started by


    touching, tasting, and exploring each other. By the end, the man was mming into his woman from


    behind as she had her head between Joselin''s legs. The small moans and whimpers that came from


    my witch were addicting, and I had identally let out a low growl.


    Joselin''s eyes met mine when she heard the sound from across the club, and I watched as she came. I


    wanted it to be me giving her such pleasure. I was seething with jealousy. I was ready to kill them for


    touching her and then tie her to my bed, so I would be the only one she could ever touch or cum for


    again.


    Then after a while, it felt like a game. I thought Joselin was doing it for me. It didn''t happen often, but


    when I saw her with someone, there was a maic pull between us. Her eyes would meet mine and


    hold my stare as she came.


    She was the most beautiful creature in the world when she reached her orgasm. Her lips would part,


    and her cheeks would flush. She would let out this moan that drove me absolutely wild.


    I wasn''t ready for her yet, though. So, as much as I wanted to be the one she was wrapped around, I


    stood back and let her have her fun. I let her enjoy herself. If that was what she wanted, who was I to


    stop her when I wasn''t ready to offer her more?


    "My affection?" Sheughed mockingly as she pulled at her hair, her eyes lining with water. "You just let


    me rub myself all over you, and you didn''t even want it. You just liked that I was giving you attention but


    didn''t want me to be physical with you? Do you know how dirty that makes me feel like I just molested


    you even though you were grinding against me too?"


    My eyes burned slightly as I felt my beasting forward, angered by her tone. She didn''t get a


    chance to move before I grabbed her by the waist and spun her around, pressing her against the wall.


    "Sweetheart, I enjoyed every minute of what you just offered me. When I do finally have you, I will give


    you plenty of reasons to feel dirty, but I promise that you will enjoy every single one of them."


    The urge to lean in and taste her was overwhelming, but I stopped when she turned her head to the


    side, showing me her cheek when I was only a centimeter away. Every contour of her body was flush


    with mine, but her arms hung limp at her sides, and the interest she showed before was gone.


    "I am done throwing myself at you, Tobias. You said that you are attracted to me, but you have turned


    me down at every turn, no matter how turned on you may have been." Joselin lifted one hand, cing it


    against my chest and pushing me back. I nced between her eyes, wishing I could see what she was


    thinking and feeling, but I did what she wanted and stepped away. "At least you were a gentleman


    enough not to act on it."


    I didn''t feel like a gentleman at all. My chest felt tight, and my throat felt dry. I wanted to tell her how I


    felt about her, but it wouldn''t be fair to her to have my feelings hanging over us when she didn''t want


    more than one night with me. Even if she did... even if she reciprocated my feelings for her, I couldn''t


    offer her anything right now, and that would only make it all worse. 1


    "Get out," She whispered, looking away as she slid out from between me and the wall, pointing to the


    door to her room.


    ''We are not done with this conversation." I snarled, desperate to feel her against me again. What she


    had just given me was like sampling a drug. I wanted more, and I wanted it now.


    "Unless you have something to say that will benefit both of us, then yes. This conversation is over." Her


    eyebrows were lifted and pulled together as she waited for me to say something. But I had no idea


    what she wanted me to say. Did she want me to change my mind and tell her we could sleep together


    tonight even though it would rip my heart out in the morning?


    Or, did she want me to tell her the truth, that I was in love with her and had been for as long as I could


    remember, that I wanted her to put her life of freedom and sex behind her and bepletely devoted


    to me for the rest of her life so I could worship her every day? 1


    I didn''t even know what she wanted, if anything, beyond sex.


    I knew that my issues were still very much present, and I couldn''t justify bringing her into my world


    when I could barely survive it on my own. It was the exact reason why I hadn''t fucked her years ago.


    Having her as my friend was more important than shoving my dick into her.


    As far as I knew, nothing had changed for either of us.


    Her freedom to do as she pleased with who she pleased was hard enough to deal with when we were


    only friends. If I ever tasted her, I would kill anyone who dared to touch her. She would be mine and


    only mine.


    But if she was mine, I would have to tell her the truth. I would have to tell her about my mate. 2


    "Get out, Tobias."