Chapter 109


    When I open my eyes, Aaron is carrying me.


    He shoulders open the door to his room and puts me down on


    the bed.


    I’m still mostly asleep so when he slides off my shoes and unbuttons my pants, I’m slow to react. When


    he draws them down, the letters from my dad spill onto the mattress.


    “Were you carrying those the whole time?”


    I’m wide awake now. “Yes. It’s partly why I was sweating so


    much with the Council members.”


    “Have you read them?” Aaron asks.


    “Not yet.”


    “I’ll leave you to it then,” he says


    I wasn’t expecting that. I thought I’d have to demand some


    privacy.


    “Thanks.”


    He nods and closes the door behind him.


    The sheets are cool and smell like him. His pillows are fluffy


    and I stack them behind me. Then I cross my legs and open the first letter.


    Dear Leah,


    You’re leaving today. I’m still not sure I made the right


    Belongs to (N)?vel/Drama.Org.


    decision and part of me


    knows your mama would skin me alive for what I’m doing,


    but I don’t see another alternative. We’re losing wolves at an


    rming rate. We’re kil ling a great number of Rathborn pack


    too, but this is a matter of wills. He proposed it on a dare, thinking I’d never give you up. And I don’t


    want to.


    The very thought of it ki lls me.


    But if I don’t, more packmates will di e.


    I doubt you’ll ever understand how hard this decision was to


    make, and I pray


    when you have pups of your own, you do a better job of it


    than me.


    I love you. If you remember nothing else, remember that. And please, try to


    forgive me.


    My hands shake and I set the note aside.


    Can I really handle ten more of these?


    I take a deep breath and then another.


    The door opens. It’s Aaron in his true form.


    His wolf tilts his head.


    I move the pillow next to me out of the way, and it’s all the


    invitation he needs.


    The big beast bounds into the room and up on the bed. He curls up right next to me, dropping his head


    in myp.


    A therapy dog that’s a couple hundred pounds and with ferocious teeth.


    I stroke his soft fur. “Thanks bud.”


    He doesn’t say anything. Just nuzzles closer.


    I open the second letter.


    Dear Leah,


    You’ve called and sent letters and I haven’t replied. It’s not that I don’t want to, but I can’t bear to hear


    you cry. You’ve begged toe home and just knowing that you are trapped-because of me-fills me


    with guilt that I can’t get past. I can’t break the treaty without rekindling this war, and I know that sounds


    awful, but I had to make a choice. A hard one. For the good of our pack.


    A father should never have to sacrifice his daughter.


    Maybe it’d be better if I just turned the pack over to him. But given all the bad blood, I can’t believe that


    he’d show mercy.


    You’re fourteen today.


    I hope that things get better. I hope that if you can let go of your old life that you can embrace your new


    one.


    I love you. If you remember nothing else, remember that. And please, try to


    forgive me.


    And so the notes go.


    Guilt. A profession of love. And a plea for forgiveness.


    I stop at sixteen.


    I don’t want to read anymore.


    I’m not sure what I was expecting. Something deeper, maybe? Something that showed more love and


    less of an “oops, sorry you were the sacrifice, but, hey, it had to happen.”


    The worst part… at thirteen, I’d wanted so badly to help. To fight. To contribute to my pack in some


    way, if my dad had just talked to me, he wouldn’t have had to apologize.


    He wouldn’t have had to throw me away to his enemy.


    Du mb girl that I’d been, I would’ve volunteered.