Chapter 31 – A Choice to Kill
“Your future will be determined more by choice than by chance.“–Frank Sonnenberg
Kiya
The weight of the world is on my shoulders again. This time, I cannot see a way out.
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02:41
From my tender scalp to my toes, my body suffers from throbbing aches. The morning sun begins a new <b>day</b>, but it couldn’t shine a light through the darkness. Unending tears fell from my eyes and my heavy body is trapped in bed. I didn’t want to do anything except stay in my room.
After my <b>episode </bst night, I woke up to find my friends surrounding me in my bed. No doubt feeling my distress through the mind–link. Jackie spooned me from behind, Abigail to my front, Sapphire and Galen cuddled into my legs. I don’t know how my bed fit <b>five </b>grown werewolves, but they made it work. Heat painted my ch*eks from the closeness and their warmth is always wee, but I feel awful for separating them from their mates. Mates sleep together, and they forgo that tofort their broken and drunken friend.
I don’t deserve them.
Sometimes<b>, </b>I felt like a burden. How many times have they put themselves on hold to help me? How many times have they risked themselves for me? They shouldn’t have to <b>do </b>any of this. They have their rich lives to take care of, not a woman who can’t get a grip on her emotions.
My mess is mine to <b>clean </b>up; they have <b>lives </b>to tend to and shouldn’t bother themselves with my problems.
Although, I wish Darien was part of our nest. Our team is iplete without him, <b>and </b>I miss him terribly. His brte disaster, however, is determined to ruin me with a knife to the heart. But I know I’ll get him back.
F*ck vodka. I should’ve known it won’t make me forget about the guard. Now, I don’t have the strength to fight against this additional weight.
I’m strong, right? I’m a survivor, right? Then why do I feel so weak? Being strong day–in and day–out is so hard. It’s <b>a </b>full–time job; a brutal full–time job.
Yet, I turned in the pink–slip the moment my eyesnded on him. Ie to learn his name as Tristan. A generic name <b>for </b>a detestable man.
Everything came back–the memories, sensations, pain, <b>and </b>more. And I couldn’t protect Artemis from the experience because I put up a wall toote after the assault. She knew that Tristan hurt me but didn’t know how brutal the hurt was. Anytime he’de into my cell to do his dirty business, protecting A
Artemis from the horrific experience became a priority. Reinforcing the mental wall so she couldn’t see, feel, or hear Tristan’s assault became routine<b>. </b>I was physically weak, but I willed myself mentally to protect my wolf from the evil cast on my body.
I knew I could protect Artemis, no matter how much I suffered. My wolf holds a special ce in my heart, and I’d be damned if anyone hurt her. She’s <b>too </b>pure to experience hell.
Even now, as she tries to help me out of my rut. Artemis is too good for <b>me</b>. How did a mighty wolf like herself get stuck with someone like me<b>?</b>
<b>“</b>Don’t you dare go down that line of thinking, youngdy!” Artemis bellowed suddenly like <b>a </b>mother st
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corning their child. “You aren’t a burden to me. Never will be. You’re rpsing into depression
and I’m here to remind you that I love you and will always be at your side no ma what
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<b>02:35</b>
“I let him get to me. Artemis,” I reply as tears dripped on my pillow.“As soon as I saw his face and smelled scent, everything came back–everything I felt as a ve. I don’t feel like myself ammore. Looking in his eyes was like he was raping me all over again.”
“Kiya, why didn’t you let me know what happened: You gave me bits and pieces, but never the full
story<b>.</b>”
“We feel everything together when our walls are down. I couldn’t let you feel what he was doing to me. You try take over to stop him, but he’d force himself on you. I couldn’t let you live with that pain too I’m sorry Artemis.
“Don’t apologize. Even when brutalized. you thought about my well–being If Artemis was next to me I’d feel her snout nuzzle into my side. A pooling of warmth appeared on the right side of my body. “You protected me. If anything. I don’t deserve you. You’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for
“I’m tired of it. I admit, rubbing the fallen tears from my ch*eks. Being strong all the times difficult. reminded of why this pack is despicable and deserves to burn to the ground for what they did i
“An eye for an eye.”
“No one here got punished for what they d Sure, they got gems, but it’s enough. They be hert off the hook. It isn’t fair. Art. None of them truly suffered.”
Be careful with this line of thinking, Kiki.” Artemis warmed. Right on cue Osins munk pulsated, making me hiss in pain. “It’s unfair, but you aren’t like them. You won’t stoop as low as they have. You’re better than them.”
“I know…”
The mark continued to throb asynchronously from my heartbeat, begging for the touch of their creator. Since disfiguring Tristan, the call to darkness strengthened. It’s like a trend impeting me into a world of infinite possibilities. Beating the shit out of my rapist brought buppiness beyondprehension–it was only a fraction of the burning rage I felt I dipped me in a sea of red, but couted in a nket of ckened security. I didn’t want to leave it. I wanted more
Osiris apuded me, delighted at my viciousness. If I wasn’t interced, I would’ve killed Tristan. I didn’t want him to die yet because he deserved more hurt. Death is too gred for him. Waking into the afterlife meant he’s free of pain and responsibility of this world and he shouldn’t escape it. Not now, not ever
Artemis is right. This line of thinking is dangerous. I can’t give Chins what he wants–me bing a ruthless monster. Bing someone ke him is not an option. I can’t give in to my dark side.N?velDrama.Org owns all ? content.
But, goddamnit, I wanted doll
I remained in bed for the rest of the day Facing the world after unveiling my shameful secret terrified me. My
han
appetite disappeared, and it ben’t turned. Taking a shower was hell because my body felt as heavy as lead. Dragging it to the bathtub was ke pulling cinderblock. I ignored my friend’s requests to hang out with them and told them they can eat my share of breakfast and lunch let their disappointment and worry through
Chapter 31–A Choice to Kill
mind–links, but I blocked them <b>out</b>.
I wanted to be alone.
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02:30
Before I could take my millionth nap, a soft knock rapped on my door. I grouchily snatched my phone off themp table and checked the time. It’s past 7 PM. I tossed my phone back and covered my <b>head </b>with my nket, hoping the person on the other side would take a hint and leave me alone.
“Delta Kiya? It’s Isabe!”
My head shot out of the nket. Great, I can’t ignore my favorite student! Sighing, I kick the covers off me and trudged to the door, meeting a pair of innocent emeralds.
“<b>Yes</b>?”
“<b>I’m </b>sorry to disturb you, but…are you okay? You canceled training and I <b>haven’t </b>seen you all day.”
Goddess, my heart. Be is worried about me. Blinking back the tears that threatened to fall again, I did my best to muster up a smile, kneeling to her level. “I’m sorry for worrying you, dear. I’m…dealing with some things and needed time away. Thank you for checking on me.”
“Well, as long as you’re okay…” This sweetheart and I developed a bond and I’m happy to see Bee out of her shell. Although, it’s normal for younglings to worry about the adults they care about; I still worry about Mom and Dad asionally.
“Is there anything else, Bell?”
“Yeah! Alpha Neron is asking for you.”
If there was a moment where I wanted to bash my head into a wall, it’d be now. I know he wants to talk about what happened on the cliff, but I’m dreading the awkwardness. Plus, there’s no way I’d avoid everyone for a day without him noticing
Regardless of my internal protests, I followed Isabe to the kitchen where Neron was waiting for me. On the ind were two tes of honey garlic salmon. My stomach thought it was a perfect moment to imitate a bear’s roar, and I know these two heard me, Neron shot me a smirk, and I blushed. His dish had less food than what I assume is mine. Isabe departed with a smile, leaving us alone.
“You look like hell.” He bluntlymented.
I rolled my eyes. “Tell me something I don’t know.” Gesturing to the seat on the opposite side of him, I begrudgingly obliged, only because I’ve yet to have a decent meal. Neron filled a cup with water from a pitcher and handed it to me. Muttering my thanks, I grabbed my fork and <b>took </b>a well–needed bite.
“Wow!” Savory vors <b>danced </b>around my tongue, making me smile. “This is <b>good</b>. Cassandra outdid herself.” Yikes<b>, </b>that left a bitter taste in my mouth.
“She didn’t make this.”
“Who did<b>?</b><b>”</b>
“Me.”
Chapter 31 Choice to kill
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I choked on my fork. That’s impossible! I imagined Neron in a lot of positions, but as a cook <b>wasn’t </b>one of them! But when I look at his face, there’s no hint of deceit. His sapphires are twinkling with delight–a drag23 change from yesterday. “Since when did you learn how to cook?”
“Mom <b>was </b>the type who believed that everyone should learn how to <b>cook</b>. It’s a necessity that shouldn’t be based on gender. She showed me how, and it stuck with <b>me</b>. I don’t cook often; only on special asions.”
“So, this is a special asion?” I asked, taking another bite of the savory salmon. Goddess, I wanted to eat this for the rest of my life!
“<b>Well</b>, I wanted to see <b>how </b>you’re doing.” He admitted, poking at his fish with his fork. <b>“</b><b>And </b>there’s something we need to talk about.”
Dread filled the <b>air </b>and savagely murdered my appetite. I dropped my fork down next to my te and felt the weight of the world on me again. Crawling into a dark hole never seemed so appealing. I’m too overwhelmed and wanted to hide until it <b>stops</b>.
“I don’t want to talk about him.” Lethal poison dripped from thest word as my body involuntarily shook from his <b>past </b><b>violence</b>. “It’s barely been two days, and he’s taking up all my thoughts. <b>Can </b>we talk about something <b>else</b><b>?</b>”
“We have to talk about him.”
“Then I’m leaving.” Abruptly, I shot up from my seat and marched towards the door.
“Tristan’s execution is set for tomorrow <b>morning</b>.”
Time stopped around me. Did I hear him correctly? Tristan will die? Turning my head, my expression is stoic, but my eyes are swimming with unspoken emotions. “What did <b>you </b><b>say</b>?”
“Tristan will be killed tomorrow morning in front of the pack,” Neron exined, pushing his food to the side. and folding his hands. “I visited him in the prisonsst night and he confessed to what he did to you, Kiya, He admitted to everything but did not express remorse.”
Since when do rapists feel guilt for what they did? <b>Rape </b>is not a ident–Tristan knew what he was doing and why. He’d always said no one would believe me if <b>I </b>said anything. I was a ve. I could attempt to tarnish his <b>name</b>, but he had too many allies who’d believe him over me, including Jonathan. He’d beat me for lying.
I stared at the door, soaking in Neron’s words. Tristan confessed to him, but I need to hear it. I need him to <b>look </b>me in the eye and admit that he brutalized me.
“In front of the pack?” I asked in a whisper.
The Alpha nodded. “Executions are public. However, <b>I </b>want to <b>ask </b>if you want to be the one to execute him.”
Such a loaded statement. My mind spun madly; I had to grasp the wall to keep steady. To be <b>the </b>one to take Tristan’s life–to end his life <b>forever</b>–a part of me wants to do it. It’ll be retribution for my inner child. The bastard will die knowing his victim lived, and he’ll be served to the mes of hell.
But another part of me doesn’t want to do it. I’m not a killer. Will killing him help me heal? I’ve lived by personal code to never take <b>a </b>life. Yes, I’ve killed rogues, but Tristan isn’t a rogue. He’s a disgraced <b>pack </b>member. Is it my right to take a life<b>?</b>
Chapter 11-& Choc
“What if I don’t want to kill <b>him</b>?”
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“I have a list of people who like to kill him, me and your sister included.” He smiled lovingly. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
“If I say yes, do I get a choice in how I kill him<b>?</b>”
“<b>Yes</b>.”
“…Can I have some time to think about this?“.
“Yes, but you have until the morning of.” Neron took my te and fork and walked to me, gently cing them <b>in </b>my hands. “Whatever your choice is, I’ll ept it. I won’t allow that man to live after what he’s done to you.” Hisrge hand cupped my ch*ek, wiping <b>away </b>a tear that escaped. “My apologies won’t erase the past but allow me to carve out a future <b>where </b>he’ll <b>never </b>hurt you again. I promised to protect you, remember? <b>And </b>I won’t stop.”
I took the te and nodded as more tears fell. Looking into his eyes, his blue took on many shades, but I see the vibrancy of <b>his vows</b>.
“Thank you,” I whisper. “For giving me this choice. I’ll sleep on it.”
“Okay.” He grins. “Finish your food. I <b>worked </b>too hard on it to let it go to waste!”
“Alright.” <b>Once </b>he released me, I left the kitchen.
No matter what happens tomorrow, Tristan is dead.
But should he die by my <b>hand</b>?
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