Strings of Fate


    Cam 48- Guilt and goals


    +10%


    Bonus


    06:33


    I try to think of the right thing to say to fix this. Should I just tell him that I love him? Would that even fix


    anything or just make it worse. I don’t think loving someone is a magical band aid that will make up for


    treating them poorly. I have seriously screwed this up. Harry is just so easy to get along with and so


    epting, it’s hard to see sometimes that there are actually things that hurt his feelings. He might be a


    demonstrative person, and he’s been honest about his own feelings from day one, but for the most


    part, he hides how things bother him. He walks around pretending not to care about the assumptions


    people make about him or the things people say and sometimes I bet he convinces even himself that


    he doesn’t mind it. But he DOES have feelings and I have just trampled all over them.


    “Harry… What you heard us saying… I didn’t mean it the way it sounded. I didn’t mean it at all.” I


    awkwardly force out. Harry scoffs angrily.


    “You mean you weren’t using me to drive Simon away?” he demands.


    “Well… I was, but it wasn’t JUST that. You knew about my problem with Simon. You even. went along


    with it at first!” I point out, referring to when he initially told Simon that he and I are together.


    “That was fake and we BOTH knew it. This… You let me think it was real. Think that I had something


    real for the first time in my life. But I guess I was the only one who thought that.” He scoffs the words


    and turns to leave again..


    “It WAS real. I didn’t mean to lie.” I call after him desperately. Harry pauses and without turning back to


    me, sighs.


    “So either it was all fake and you never cared, or it was real and you were so ashamed of it that you


    couldn’t even admit it to your friend. Is that supposed to make me feel better?” He asks bitterly. He’s on


    a roll now and keeps talking, whirling back to face me again.


    “You know, I was trying so hard. I didn’t want to be dishonest about my feelings or cause any


    confusion. I didn’t want to make the same mistake that Ryann did and be so scared of my future that I


    hurt someone. But now I see I’m far more like Simon. I got carried away with my own feelings and


    didn’t stop to actually confirm that the girl likes me before forcing my affection andpany on her.


    You’ve implied many times that I’m someone who uses women


    1/4


    Cam 48- Guilt and goals


    for my own purposes. I didn’t realise you really believed that. But you know what, you are such a


    hypocrite. At least the women I slept with knew what to expect from me. Meanwhile


    you cruelly led me along and used me. I’ve been honest from the start, I’ve NEVER manipted you.”


    He snarls the final words. Even now, I can feel a wave of his magic rolling through me. It makes my


    blood boil and my temper rise.


    “Are you JOKING? You manipte me all the time! You’re doing it right now! Your magic is as constant


    as you are. I wanted to dismiss it, but how can I trust that? With your magic, you could have ANYONE


    so why would I believe you would want to waste your time with me?” I’m crying. When did I start


    crying? Why am I yelling? I wanted to make up with Harry, not yell at him. I didn’t realise I was so angry


    about his magic, I thought that I had epted it. It seems like I haven’t really. Still, I immediately regret


    my words. I’m about to say something, take it back. Apologise. I don’t know. But before I get the


    chance, Harry responds, his voice


    quiet.


    This is the property of N?-velDrama.Org.


    “Clearly you think nothing of me and you have no idea how my magic even works, not that


    you would know. You never asked. That should have clued me in earlier to how little you care.


    I’m the only one who ever asked questions. I’m done wasting my time with this. You im I’m all about


    maniption and physical rtionships. But who would know the difference


    between lust and actual emotion better than an Incubus? But it doesn’t matter. You don’t


    trust me and you never will. I’m done.” Without another word, he turns and walks away into


    the dark streets. I stare after him. I want to stop him, but I feel like anything I : will make it worse. He’s


    partially right. I didn’t trust himpletely. With my safety yes, but with my heart? My happiness? I’ve


    been waiting for this to end from day one and yet now


    that it has I’m struggling to believe it.


    I stand in the carpark staring after him and shivering in the cool night air until Cora approaches me and


    gently drops a hand on my shoulder.


    “Cam? Maybe you should head home. I don’t think you can work like this. I can close up tonight.” She


    says gently, her voice full of sympathy. I nod mindlessly. I don’t want to work right now anyway. I’m not


    sure I want to go home either, but I have to do SOMETHING.


    “Okay, thanks.” I tell her in a monotone. I’m about to leave but Cora catches my hand, squeezing my


    fingers tightly.


    “I’m sorry I said what I said. I should have thought it through.” She apologies. I shake my head and


    sigh.


    +11


    Вог


    06:


    2/4


    “I’m the one who said it in the first ce. Do you… uu you um … over this?” I ask, not sure what I want


    her to say. Cora shakes her head.


    3


    “No, he was good to you…And… for hat it’s worth… I haven’t felt a hint of Harry’s magic in months. Not


    since he first became interested in you.” She admits softly. My eyes widen. I assumed that everyone


    was getting hit with his magic. I thought I was getting it worse purely because of the amount of time


    we’ve been spending together. But Cora hasn’t been feeling it at all? I really need to learn more about


    how Incubus magic works. I’m an idiot for not asking someone sooner. That, at very least, is something


    I can do. I can learn more about Incubi. I don’t know if Harry will give me another chance, but if he


    does, I won’t make the same mistake again. Determined to find a way to fix things, I head home. The


    walk feels longer than usual and I know why. I spend the walk thinking about exactly what it is I did


    wrong so that I can try to make it right. I never REALLY gave Harry a chance. I told myself I was, and I


    was dating him, but it was under the assumption that it would end and that it would never really go


    anywhere. I had one foot out the door from the start. He isn’t wrong, I WAS kind of using him, even


    though I told myself he would be okay with it I knew it wasn’t right or fair to


    to see him. Harry was also right that I haven’t put in the work to get to know him. Hees to me, my


    home, my work, he chose dates and activities based on what I would enjoy doing. We discussed my


    family issues, my magic and my goals for the future. Iined about his magic, but he’s never done


    a single thing without my express consent. Never kissed me, pushed anything on me. Even when it


    came to my rtionship with my family he has never came to my rtionship with my family he has


    never pressured me or tried to force his opinion on me. Sure, he teases me a lot, but it’s basically a


    game at this point and I don’t think I want him to stop. I had a very serious childhood and just being


    around Harry has shown me more ways I can enjoy life and not take myself too seriously. I make a list


    of what I need to do.


    1- Learn about Harry’s magic.


    2- Apologise to Harry properly.


    3- Confess my feelings properly.


    4- Put more effort into getting to know Harry.


    5- Stop thinking about our rtionship as temporary.


    Now if only I had any idea how to aplish any of these things.


    never