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Chapter 16 Asher
+5 Pearls
After tossing and turning, for goddess knows how many more hours after my recurring nightmare, I
had given up all hope of sleep finding me again. Though in some ways I think sleep was something
I dreaded because it brought that vision over and over. It meant I had to lose I again and again.
The pain had been the worst pain I could ever imagine. I, like so many others, had heard of wolves
losing their mate and the damage it could do to them, but never thought much of it. Though, I
suppose, as a young and carefree boy, enjoying my life and having fun, why would you?
But, at the age of seventeen, fate had decided that was what fate would be dealt to me. I was to
discover exactly what the pain could be. Discover the agonizing sensation as agony rippled through
my body as the matebond was torn from me. Experience exactly how torturous the loss. would feel,
and despite being surrounded by a pack, just how lonely you could feel when the one person
destined to be by your side was no longer there. I had barely had a chance to develop a long-
standing bond with my mate, but she was mine all the same. The connection was there, like it was
with all fated mates. And losing her felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest and shredded
into pieces.
And now, near seven years on, I felt like I was still trying to piece it all together, and I still felt like
there were pes missing. Pieces of my heart are missing and pieces of me are missing. And these
dreams… these visions, reliving it all meant I felt that pain… experienced it all… so often… too
often… I could see how losing a mate could send a person to the brink of insanity. I think I may
have verged upon that edge many times. I sometimes wonder if my own pack members question if I
have already teetered over the edge. But, my focus in coping was my role as a Beta.
Soon after I lost my beautiful girl, Caleb became Alpha and I became Beta. It gave me a sense of
purpose. I had a pack to be there for. I had failed my mate. I knew that, and would never forgive
myself for that. But, I could be there for the people within my pack. And that is what I had tried to do.
Doing so many more duties than were expected of me, just to keep my mind busy. But, in my own
time, I was very isted. I became withdrawn. But, that was what felt right. That was where I
wanted to be. Alone.
I know I caused many concerns and rumors to be spread about my darkness and the fact I was so
withdrawn. Living alone within the packhouse, now Caleb lived within his Alpha home with his mate
and our pack Luna, only made the situation worse. But, I could not bring myself to live in my former
Beta home that I and I had moved into when she hade to the pack. The home held too
many memories. We had only been there a short time together, but it held memories of love. Hope.
Excitement. Dreams of new mates and their future. The two of us together. Returning there alone
after she had gone, it felt like the house was empty. Like something was missing. I couldn’t stay…
So, I had moved into the Beta suite within the Packhouse and I had stayed there. Our pack was
unique in that it had many homes for all our pack members, so despite the bedrooms within the
packhouse, they were not needed. There was nobody living in the packhouse now other than me.
So, once the crowds from the day had left, it became quite lonely. But, I have to say I preferred it
that way.
I had showered and sat myself in my office, coffee in hand, reading through files in preparation for
my meetingter in the morning. Some she-wolf from a pack further out in the region, I believe, who
my Uncle was suggesting as a potential teacher for the pack’s junior school. As much
12:23 PM
Chapter 16 Asher
+5 Pearls
Content is ? by N?velDrama.Org.
as I respect my Uncle, he had been drinking the night he was trying to suggest this woman to me,
so I had decided it would be best to invite the girl to the pack for us to speak with her ande to
our own conclusion on whether she would be suitable. I did not want just anyone being brought into
the pack, no matter how desperate we may be.
“Good Morning handsome!” Eden greeted me, as she came into the office, Caleb holding the office
door open for her, a smile upon his face.
“That is more than I got. She red at me, and hissed that this was all my fault while she, in a far
fromdy-like manner, rolled out of bed.” Calebughed, and I held back the smirk ying on my
lips. Eden had a habit of ming her pregnancy difort on her mate.
“What he fails to mention is that he offered to give me a push!” Eden says, yfully ruffling Caleb’s
dark hair.
I raised my eyebrows at him. “Well, you likely deserve everything you get.” I said with a shake of my
head, trying not tough.
“Not like either of you have to go through this.” Eden argues, easing herself down onto the sofa at
the edge of my office. “What time are our visitors from Lotus Shadow Pack arriving?”
“Honestly, she makes out like she is the first she-wolf to go through pregnancy and childbirth.”
Caleb says with a shrug, and a wink in my direction, indicating he is being yful, but even I know
he is asking for trouble. His mate is not going to appreciate the implication that she is not capable of
pregnancy. Or that it is easy. I nce across to Eden and the angry look upon her face. tells me she
is ready to rip her mate apart. Hmm, yeah I don’t think I will get involved in this…
“They should be on their way anytime now for the interview.” I answered Eden’s question, choosing
to ignore Caleb.
“Why are you interviewing them? We need a teacher, she is qualified andes rmended
from Alpha Isaak.” Eden questions, looking at me with confusion. This irritates me when she
suddenly decides how I do things is not the right way, despite the fact I have been doing this job a
job, not to mention
lot longer than she has been here. And I have undertaken training to do “e been doing this job a
watching my Dad do the job for years as well.
“Oh, so you are happy to let anyonee into the pack without checking their details first? And I’m
pretty sure Uncle Isaak was more than well gone on tequ when he was making that
rmendation, so yeah I think we will do our own checks first.” I say, knowing I sound more than
a little snappy, but being past caring. This has be a regr urrence ofte. But, I had little
patience to deal with others. Everything they did simply irritated me. I prefer to be alone.
“Ash, no need to be like that.” Caleb says with a warning tone. Funny how he was being a d*ck with
his mate a matter of minutes ago and now suddenly he is jumping to her defense. I simply shrugged
in response.
“Well, they are on their way. An interview has been arranged. We will decide from there.” I said,
standing from my desk, needing some fresh air before I said something I regretted.
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