Chapter 35 Behind The Facade


    Evelyn


    I do not want to open the door- That''s what I tried to convince myself as I struggled to remain in my ce, battling my own inner turmoil.


    Why was he here? He shouldn''t be second-guessing himself given howposedly he had uttered those words, sharp as daggers, without a hint of hesitation. He had won that round-slipping away effortlessly.


    "Evelyn?"


    Damn! The timbre of his voice tugged at me, and I resented how much sway he held over me and I despised how much control he had over me. Anger surged within me, and I wiped away my tears, determined to stand my ground. I got off the bed, determined not to let him affect me any longer. Enough was enough.


    I opened the door. "Why are you here? Want me to book a ne ticket for you?"


    Instead of the quick response I had expected, he looked at me, his eyes taking in my tear-stained face and the evidence of my crying. His gaze softened.


    For a fleeting moment, my anger wavered, but I clenched my fists, holding on to it.


    He was dressed as if ready to leave, yet there was no suitcase in sight.


    Was he here to say goodbye? The thought set off rm bells in my mind. He better not try to put on a show of saying farewell and wishing me well, because I wouldn''t stand for it.


    "Why are you here, Jacob? To say goodbye or to ask for a favour, like keeping everything between us a secret for a lifetime? I don''t see any other reason for you to be here, and I''m not interested in either. So you should leave, or else—"


    "I know I screwed up," he interrupted, his sigh heavy with regret, each word carrying the weight of it, "I''m sorry, Evelyn. Really sorry."


    "Are you? Fine, I heard you. Now leave," I said, making an attempt to swing the door shut. But he ced his hand against the wall, blocking me. "Evelyn, please let me exin."


    It was difficult to refuse him like this.


    "The earliest flight to Italy departs at 12.30. You''d best hasten to catch it," This time, as I aimed to close the door, he stepped inside, and in that instant, I relinquished half my resolve. He secured the door, sliding an arm around my waist, drawing me closer, and in doing so, eliminated any avenues of escape.


    He was too close...


    "What... what do you think you''re doing?" My gaze remained averted, unable to meet his eyes due to ack of strength and courage.


    "I''m sorry," he murmured, his forehead gently touching mine. He trailed his nose along my cheek, his voice heavy with guilt, and his gaze wavering, "I shouldn''t have said those things to you. It was a loss of control. I felt it was best for you not to get entangled in the mess."


    "What mess are you even talking about? Last time I checked, I was there to support you, and you decided tosh out at me for absolutely no reason," frustration tinted my words as I ced my hands between us, attempting to push against his chest, "Anyway, I don''t want to talk right now. I''m exhausted and all I need is sleep."


    "I am the mess," he admitted, drawing me in even closer. "I''m fucked up, and I guess I didn''t want you to see that. I didn''t want you to witness the moments when I''m weak and questioning my worth. I only wanted you to see the whitewashed version of me, the one that''s strong and confident, never falls weak... and in the process, I ended up hurting you. I''m sorry. Please, don''t stay mad at me. I feel like I am dying when you are not around."


    This time, he seeded inpelling me to meet his gaze. His eyes appeared on the brink of tears, and that vulnerability triggered my own suppressed emotions.


    The tears I had been restraining throughout his presence finally escaped, tracing down my cheeks, "W-Why? Why did you want that?" "Because I was afraid that my imperfections would lead you to push me away, and that''s why I thought I should-"


    "Cut ties before I could distance myself from you?"


    His gaze faltered, and I observed him inhale a shaky breath. "Yes. That''s why I reacted the way I did."


    "Everyone carries their own imperfections, Jacob. They have their own demons to fight. No one''s wless," I whispered, my fingers finding his face, tracing his jawline gently, "What really counts is whether we''re willing to ept those ws, whether we''re ready to stand by them. I''m not in search of perfection, not chasing a fairy tale, I never chased one. What I''ve always wished is... to be with you. Ever since I understood what it meant to want someone, it''s always been you. How could you even think that your past would change how I feel and what choices I make?"


    "I know I was mistaken. I''m sorry for what I''ve done...I really am," he sighed, his voice quivering. "Remember that day at the beach when you asked me if it''s rtionships or love that scares me... and I couldn''t answer?"


    Drawing him in, I pressed our foreheads together, exhaling softly, "Yes, I remember."


    "Love terrifies me, Evelyn, because


    all I''ve seen is its darker side," he


    began, his words hesitant, "My father''s love for his addiction, my mother''s love for him despite his abusive ways, even to herst day which came far too soon because of him. My sister''s love for me, marked on her back from saving me from my father''s beatings until the day he met his untimely end in an ident. And then there''s my own love for Chloe, which drove me to the brink. It''s always been shadows for me, no light, no bright ces. That''s why... I''m scared of it. Remembering all of it hurts, because I want to move beyond it all. I''m not holding on, but these memories, they never leave."


    "I understand," I whispered, gently cradling his face before pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, "I understand, and you don''t have to talk about it if it hurts too much. I get it."


    n


    "But I want to," he admitted, his restlessness still evident, "It''s not easy for me to open up because I never wanted to. But with you, I want to break free from that. You bring out the best in me, and being with you feels so right despite everything wrong. I''ve always held my expectations high, but life hasn''t handed me what I wanted. Then I met Chloe, when I was just fifteen. It started with friendship and grew into something more. I was young, adjusting to my new parents who had thankfully adopted me and Jessica. We were trying to forget the


    traumas of the past. When Chloe


    offeredfort, it felt like all I


    needed. I thought I was finally making progress, finding fulfilment.


    But I didn''t realise she was using


    me."


    "Oh..Jacob," I didn''t even know how I couldfort him. It pained me to even think he had gone through all of this.


    Oh, How I wished I could heal all of his past wounds and mend him so right that none of those memories could ever haunt him again.


    “She had this twisted desire, an unhealthy need for people''s lives to revolve around her, and I foolishly indulged that sick desire. I spent years seeking her approval for everything, from my clothes to my shoes, even the way I spoke. I believed that byplying, I could keep her with me. Eventually, it became too much to bear. We drifted apart, but she wasn''t finished."


    That fucking bitch....


    "It was difficult for her to ept that our rtionship ended. When we met again during our college years at the same institution where I and your mom and dad studied, she wormed her way back into my life," he continued, a mix of frustration and rage in his voice, “And I let her, foolishly."


    "Except this time, she portrayedContent bel0ngs to N?vel(D)r/a/ma.Org.


    herself differently at first. She made me believe she had changed, until she started showing her true colours once more. We fought endlessly. There were moments of physical aggression from her, and ckmailing if I even mentioned ending things. She swung between being controlling and loving, exploiting the fact that I loved her,"


    he said with a bitter chu


    Gwe


    had cycles of breaking up and getting back together thatsted for


    years, so toxic and tiring. Until it reached a breaking point, when I discovered she was cheating on me. Even then, she tried to shift the me onto me, saying that I was at fault for focusing on my business model and studies instead of giving her attention. So I walked away, and I took a job offer in Italy. I returned to my hometown, working from my grandmother''s house until I got an investor''s offer and things took off. Despite all that, she would call me, offering empty apologies that held no sincerity."


    God, I will kill that damn woman.


    "After going through all that because of her, seeing her today brought back all those feelings I''ve been carrying," he admitted, "I''ve always resented myself for letting her manipte my emotions and trample all over me. Her presence today made me feel worthless, just like she used to back then. I took it out on you, and I''m deeply sorry for that. Can you forgive me and forget what I said?"


    "I already have," A smile made its way to my lips.


    "Thank you. Thank you so much." He leaned in, his lips meeting mine in a fervent kiss that carried the weight of pent-up emotions. He explored every


    nuance of my mouth.


    Finally....


    It felt liberating. Like a heavy burden had been lifted from my shoulders.


    Damn! I had missed his touch. His scent. The way he held me close. It was as if we''d been apart for years, even though it had only been a matter of


    hours.


    He broke the kiss, leaving both of us breathless and wanting more, "I had asked you to spend the day with me, but I ruined it. Will you give me a chance to make it up to you?"


    "Of course," I replied, a smile tugging at my lips. "What do you have in mind?"


    "I can''t tell you. You''ll have to get ready and see for yourself."


    "We''re going out somewhere?"


    "Yes, we are," he chuckled, noticing my curiosity, and gave me a tender peck on the lips. "Now get ready, sweetheart."