Chapter 122
Sinir
Don’t shift, don’t shift, don’t shift. I think manically E needs you.
Listening to E recount her childhood always makes me furious, but this time is
worse than all the others. I’ve suspected that E suffered terrible traumas for some
time now, but before this night l’d been able to pacify my outrage with the hope that
I’m wrong.
No longer.
As E speaks, I wonder how she could ever imagine herself weak. I can’t even stand
to listen to her story, but she actually lived it. She sacrificed herself for her sister, and
she survived things I can only imagine
“When the matron realized it was me, she smiled so cruelly that my stomach turnedshe was only too
d to take, me instead of Cora.” E continues, shuddering with
the memory. Her unease gives my wolf the push he needed to put aside his own rage
andfort her. I finally manage a weak purr, and E presses her nose to my chest,
breathing in my scent.
“She took me to her own room and put me in her bed, and then she got in with me
and.. started touching me in ways I didn’t like or understand.
She made me touch her too, and she never stopped talking She told me how pretty I
was over and over, and kept asking me if I liked it. I said no, but she just insisted that
this was a special, secret game I was lucky to y. She said everything I was feeling
might be confusing, but it was good and right and natural. She said it took practice,
but that we’d have plenty of time.. Afterwards she took me back to the dorm with a
reminder not to share our secret. Cora asked me what happened but I didn’t know
how to exin.”
“The next day I went to the doctor in residence, and I told him what the matron had
done. I’d never liked him much, but in my heart I knew what had happened was
wrong, and I didn’t know who else to tell. I thought that since it was about my body,
the doctor was the one who could help. There was no such thing as sex ed at the
orphanage and no one else ever talked to us about our bodies. At first I was relieved
to tell someone. The doctor seemed very concerned, and agreed that it sounded
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strange.”
“Then he told me that he needed to examine me..
E’s words areing in starts and stops now, and her shaking is getting worse. The
bath is still steaming around us, so I know she isn’t cold and I know the worst isn’t
over yet. “He took off my clothes and put me on the exam table. and then I’ll never
forget the way he said, ‘now it’s very important that you be still, E. This is a different
kind of exam than you’re used to, and if you move too much I could hurt you.
Tears stream down E s cheeks as she quotes the doctor, and it takes all my
strength to contain my wolf. “Then he said, T know little girls can have a hard time
staying still, so I have these nifty straps to help you. He pulled out restraints from
under the table and strapped me down. and then he asked me exactly what the
matron did, and when I exined he would touch me exactly how she had, saying like
this? and if I didn’t answer, if I cried or objected, he would only do it rougher and
demand I tell him”
“After the first minute or so I figured out what he was about, and I didn’t want to
answer his questions anymore, but if I didn’t speak he would start guessing more and
more abuses, always demonstrating them on my body. They were far worse than
anything she’d done.. So I answered. I told him how to hurt me.” E is interrupted by
my ferocious snarl, and she looks up at me for the first time since she started
speaking. Her eyes are overflowing, but she offers me a bitter smile and reaches up to
stroke my jaw. “It’s okay, big bad wolf, it’s almost over.
My snarl bes a whine, and E determinedy forges on. “I was too young to
understand why they did those things, but I knew how it made me feel: guilty, tainted,
defiled.. I never wanted it to happen again, but I was already broken, and there were
other girls like Cora who weren’t yet.
Oh no. No, no, no tell me she didn’t!I have a horrible sick feeling in my stomach, and I
wish could go back in time and whisk E away from that horrible ce before anyone
could hurt her.
Of course, that only would have meant other children would be hurt, which is how I
already know what E did. My brave, brilliant little mate would never stand by and let
another child be abused… even if it meant being abused herself.
“So I stopped hiding at night. I gave myself up so the others wouldn’t be touched.. I
figured I couldn’t be ruined more than I already was, and it was better than allowing
someone else to be destroyed.” E shares, confirming my fears but also magnifying
my despair by exining her logic. “The matron came almost every night… and the
doctor would call me in for check ups every few weeks. I hated those visits worse than
anything. the matron was sort of gentle, and she never tied me down or gagged me.
She didn’t want to inflict pain, she seemed determined to make me like it.”
The doctor was different. He was a true sadist; he loved my fear, loved my pain. And
he escted over time.” E hides her face in my neck as she concludes her horrible
tale “When I was twelve he r*ped me, and that’s when Cora and I ran away. I invited
the other girls to run with us, but most were more afraid of living on the street than
they were of the matron. Luckily they didn’t know about the doctor, and I warned the
ones who stayed behind to never confide in him.”
My hands are mped so tightly on E I’m afraid I must be hurting her, but she
doesn’tin.
She’s still crying, but her muscles have unwound now that her story isplete.
There are tears in my own eyes, and I can only kiss and caress my sweet mate as I
process everything she shared. “
Are they still there? The matron and the doctor?” I finally ask, my voice a dangerous
hiss.
“No.” E replies. “Cora and I could only live outside during the summers, and we tried
to stay away through the first winter, but eventually the police found us squatting in an
abandoned building and returned us to the orphanage. When we got back they had
both been fired. Apparently a state inspection was run and the entire staff was booted
out. The new regime wasn’t much better, so we kept running away in the summers,
but it was safe enough to return each winter.. I have no idea where those two are now.
I’ll hunt them down.” I decide, bloodthirsty fantasies already racing through my mind. If
it’s possible, my wolf is dreaming of even gorier revenges than I am, particrly for
the doctor.
We’ll just see how he likes being tied up and gagged. How much he enjoys pain and
having things shoved.
“You don’t have to do that.” E interupts his disturbing ns, nuzzling my throat. “I
survived, and I’m safe now.” She says it almost as though she’s trying to remind
herself more than me, and I scold myself for turning to vengeance when she still
needsforting.
“You are safe.” I confirms, stroking her hair and depositing kisses everywhere I can
reach. “You’re safe and loved and the only way anyone will ever hurt you again is over
my dead body.”1 don’t add that I still n on finding her abusers, if not for vengeance
than to ensure they never harm another child. I’m painfully aware of the fact that other
children might be in their grasps at this very moment, but E doesn’t need to hear
that E pulls her head up, narrowing her red eyes at me “Dominic, I would rather be
hurt than lose you.
No. I proim, the corner of my mouth twitching up. “I willy down my life before I
allow you to get so much as a paper cut. I will throw myself to the wolves if you even
stub your toe.
E manages a smallugh, and the pain in my chest eases slightly She peeks up at
me from beneath hershes “But if you’re not here then who will kiss my injuries
better? Who will keep me from bumping into furniture and bruising myself?
Hmm, you make a good point.” I decide, “perhaps we can negotiate the level of injury
that warrants my death.”
“How gracious of you” She smiles, sighing as I run my hands up and down her sides.
I’m infinitely relieved that E has finally rxed, but I can’t get over what she told me.
“You’re incredible, you know that? I inquire, knowing she doesn’t want to hear it, but
shushing her objections. “I mean it, E. I know you were angry with yourself for
panicking when you were trying to help me, but the fact that you did is the direct result
of the sacrifices you made to protect your family. It’s not a sign of weakness
Sweetheart. It’s evidence of your strength your resilience. I lean down to kiss her You
were born to be a Luna, and you will be mine.