idental Surrogate For Alpha Novel Free -Chapter 51
E
My mind goes nk at first. Sinir is too close to the truth, to figuring out that I’m not as immune to
him as either of us would like to believe. The voice in my head is panicking, but I try to keep it together.
Praying for calm, I take a deep breath, and as I exhale I recall the ability to speak.
“Because we’re supposed to be in this together, and you yed me.” I murmur, speaking the truth – but
not the whole truth. I can’t admit to him that I feel utterly rejected by his ploy, that I feel unwanted on a
visceral level and it’s tearing me up inside for reasons I don’t yet understand. “You yed me like I’m
one of those reporters, or the Prince.”
Sinir’s face twists into a grimace, and the next thing I know he’s reaching for me, “Please,e
here E.”
“No.” I insist stubbornly, preparing to move away if he tries to approach me.
“I’m sorry.” He expresses, looking truly remorseful. “I didn’t mean to do that. I care about you, I don’t
want to hurt you that way.”
“Well you did.” I reply petntly. I don’t know where thises from. With anyone else I would have
epted the apology and moved on, whether I actually felt better or not. I’ve always chosen peace
over my own feelings – but I find it very hard to pretend with Sinir. I think he would know that I don’t
actually feel better, so why should I fake it?
“I know.” He nods grimly. “I promise I’ll find a way to make it up to you.”
“I don’t need some sort of reparation.” I insist, “Just… do better, Dominic.”
“I will.” Sinir vows soberly, “You have my word.”
I breathe a sigh of relief, but Sinir is surveying me closely. I can tell he wants to metaphorically kiss
and make up, but as I suspected, he senses my upset is not wholly resolved. “What else?” He prompts.
“Nothing important.” I shrug, not feeling brave enough to ask the questions I’m most curious about.
“E,” He says my name as an admonition, scolding me for not being honest with nothing but those two
familiar sybles. “Come on, tell me what’s on your mind.”
I gnaw on my lower lip, hating that he can read me so easily, but also relieved that I might get my
answers. “Alright, what was all that about discipline? Those things the Prince said about my insolence?
It didn’t just sound like Alpha stuff… I mean it’s one thing to be insubordinate to a leader, but the way
you two were talking… it made it seem like all men expect to be in charge of their mates.”
Sinir’s lips quirk at the edges, and the energy in the limo abruptly shifts. The air around us goes taut,
feeling suddenly tense and electric despite the fact that nothing has actually changed. Neither one of
us have moved a muscle. Still I know Sinir feels it too – it’s all too obvious in his reply. “Such a
clever little human.”
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“You mean it’s true?” I gape. “Why, because of the dominance thing? But that’s so backwards! You just
said that strength and all that doesn’t have true value.”
Sinir emits a low rumble. “I said ites down to power dynamics, and that dominance isn’t a virtue
– but it is a reality in rtionships.”
“So what, because men are physically stronger they get to boss around their mates?” I demand hotly.
Sinir chuckles, shing his fangs and clearly enjoying my indignation. “You have to remember that
shifters are very primal beings. Whatever instincts humans once possessed have been socialized out
of you. You’ve beenpletely detached from your inner animal. But for us? Our inner animal controls
everything, our instincts drive everything.”
“And everyone else has to submit?” I guess, feeling a shiver run down my spine. “Even to their lovers?”
“Especially to their lovers.” Sinir smirks. “For she-wolves, the best mate possible is the one who can
best protect and provide for them. Their instincts drive them to test potential partners in order to figure
out who is the strongest. They need to feel their mate’s dominance to know they’re safe, to satisfy their
own inner animal. Only then will they submit.” Sinir shares. “That’s part of why I think you’d make
such a good wolf. I think you have some of those same instincts. You may not realize it, but you often
test your limits with me, the same way she-wolves test their mates to ensure they have the strongest
partner.”
“So all that talk about discipline… that was serious? Literal?” I squeak nervously.
Sinir is up now, crossing the limo to sit beside me, invading my space with his big body. “Yes.” He
rumbles deeply. “It was. Does that scare you?” I don’t know why, but for some reason, his ominous
manner makes me think he wants me to say yes, he wants me to be scared. Oh Goddess, what do I do
now?
______________________
Sinir
E’s eyes are adorably wide, and she’s squirming in her seat. However she doesn’t look afraid, she
looks intrigued – curious. I can see her thighs clenching reflexively, and I can smell the beginnings of
her arousal. My wolf howls in triumph. The gendered nature of shifter power dynamics might outrage
E’s human values, but she clearly craves a strong mate just like any she-wolf – whether she realizes
it or not. Her body has always responded to my dominance even when her saucy little mouth argues
against it.
“So,” her pink lips form a perfect “o” as she tries to wrap her mind around this idea, “if a she-wolf does
something her mate doesn’t agree with, she just gets abused?”
“Of course not.” I exin, pulling E into myp. “Only weak men assert their authority through
violence or mistreatment. That isn’t our way.”
“But you said –”
“Consequences, not abuse.” I correct gently.
“What kind of consequences?” E asks, a tiny furrow appearing in her brow. I wish I could read her
thoughts right now, but it’s enough to see the blend of eagerness and apprehension on her beautiful
face – she’s excited by this conversation, and more than a little interested.
“Well, what does that word make you think of?” I inquire, thoroughly enjoying watching Ee to
terms with these ideas. It hasn’t been easy for me to pull back my wolf from treating her like one of our
own, especially when she shows so many wolfish qualities. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hoping this
conversation might open a new door in our rtionship.
“With the children I nannied consequences were things like time outs and no screen time – groundings
for the older kids.” E exins.
“It’s much the same with our pups.” I say, to E’s obvious relief. “But mates aren’t pups. You aren’t a
pup.”
“I don’t understand.” She frowns, fidgeting nervously. Her silky thighs are still clenching and it’s all the
more obvious now that she’s settled in myp. The sweet little human probably thinks I don’t have a
clue what she’s up to, but I know perfectly well that she’s trying to relieve the ache between her legs.
“Sure you do.” I encourage. “Just say the first thing thates to your mind.”
“I mean, dominance and submission…” She trails off, her voice no louder than a whisper. “That makes
it sound like… kinky sex stuff.”
“It does, doesn’t it?” I tease, stroking her hip.
“You mean it is?!” E exims, looking scandalized.
“You never experimented with that sort of thing?” I ask.
She flushes. “I’ve only ever been with Mike – he wasn’t the adventurous type.”
“Well in my book, these things aren’t adventurous. They’re standard – normal and natural.” I rte, my
voice low and husky. “And more fun than you can imagine.”
“But it’s discipline.” E argues. “Isn’t that only fun for you?”
“Not if you’re doing it right.” I remark coolly. “And it’s fulfilling for us both. She wolves need to submit as
much as male wolves need to dominate – it’s in our dna.”
“That soundspletely sexist. Would a she-wolf tell me the same thing?” E asks archly.
“Ask Aileen if you want.” I shrug.
“Well it’s not as if these things really matter for us.” She reasons, straightening up a little. “After all, I’m
not a she-wolf, and we’re not actually mates.” Am I imagining a twinge of disappointment in her voice?
But over which part? The fact that she’s human? That we aren’t mates? Or is she sad she won’t
experience these things herself? I already know she never had anyone to take care of her – she’s
never had discipline or consequences in her life, she only knew neglect as a child. Does she want
someone who will give her the care she was denied now?
“True,” I agree. “But now that you know the consequences, I wouldn’t be too surprised if you get them
the next time you act out.”
“But we aren’t lovers!” E objects, her pupils dting and her breathing in little pants.
“No, but you’re the mother of my pup, that makes you my responsibility.