idental Surrogate For Alpha Novel Chapter 40


    E


    “What?” I squeak, my voice catching in my throat. The moment the words left Sinir’s mouth I felt my


    blood run cold, and now I feel as though I might topple over with the shock of it. I must have misheard


    him, surely he doesn’ mean what I think he does.


    “That night you heard someone growling in your bathroom?” Sinir exins, stepping forward as


    though he wants to reach for me, but stopping himself short when I flinch away. “I told you I didn’t smell


    anything… but I lied. There was someone in your rooms, I just didn’t want to scare you.”


    “And you let me go back there, knowing there’d been an intruder?” I demand, indignation swirling to life


    amidst my fear, surprise and sorrow.


    “Sweetheart, I had the guards do a thorough search of the grounds then and there. They were long


    gone, and I’ve had you sleeping in my rooms ever since. I also increased the guards during the day


    when I knew you’d be back there.” He shares. “Trust me, I’ve done everything possible to ensure your


    safety.”


    “Except tell me that I was in danger!” I cry. “It’s no wonder you flipped out the way you did when I went


    to see your father! And you med me like I was supposed to know about the threat!”


    “E –” He begins in a cating tone.


    “No!” I cut him off, stomping my foot out of pure wrath. “How am I supposed to know it’s dangerous if


    you don’t tell me, Dominic?” I exim. “You didn’t even tell me about the rogue attack and that had


    nothing to do with me! All this time I thought you were being overbearing and overprotective, but I just


    didn’t have a clue what was happening in my own life!” Toote I realize my earlier desire to leave


    before I start crying is now a lost cause. Tears are sliding down my cheeks as I continue. “How could


    you do that! You know what I went through with Mike. I spent years thinking I knew my situation when it


    was all lies – and you turned around and did the exact same thing!”


    Dominic’s usually golden skin goes very pale, “Goddess E, I never even thought about it that way.”


    He admits. “I was just trying to protect you and the pup. I didn’t want you to be afraid.”


    “Well all you actually did was make a fool of me.” I inform him stiffly. “And for the record, you also made


    me more vulnerable to danger. Do you think I would have ever considered sneaking away without


    guards if I knew someone might actually be after me?! Do you believe I would ever risk my baby that


    way?”


    “E, I’m sorry.” Sinir professes, and I’m amazed to see how earnest he looks. Gone is the bossy


    Alpha who orders everyone about andys down thew when they defy him, reced by a man who


    has been truly humbled. “I’m truly, truly sorry. I was inconsiderate and patronizing – I assumed I knew


    what was best and never consulted you… I’ve been a hypocrite, I’ve been going on about being a team


    but I’ve been acting like a tyrant.” He continues. “You were right, and that’s not the kind of parent I want


    to be.”


    Despite my simmering anger, I’mpletely agog. I never expected a man as powerful as Sinir to


    admit a mistake – or any fault for that matter. I thoroughly believed that people of his ilk never took


    responsibility for their actions, because they have the privilege of passing it off onto someone else.


    Even men without means, like Mike, often can’t admit when they’re wrong. In fact, as a woman, the


    number of times I’ve heard any man tell me that I’m right in a disagreement is… well, I think this is the


    first time.


    “Can you ever forgive me?” Sinir is still going,ing forward to brush the hair back from my face,


    and looking deep into my eyes.


    I cross my arms over my chest, tilting my chin up and giving him a haughty sniff to hide my


    amazement. “As long as you promise never to do it again.”


    “I promise that I’ll try to do better.” Sinir vows, taking hold of my arms. “I’m still an Alpha, and


    hopefully a King. It’s in my nature to protect at all costs, and those instincts are strongest when it


    comes to she-wolves and pups. When I think about you in danger my wolf fairly loses his mind, and I


    really am concerned about this pregnancy. You’re high risk as a human, and the longer your blood


    pressure stays elevated, the more likely you are to be high risk in shifter terms too.”


    His words send a frisson of fear through my nerves. I’ve been trying to tell myself all this worry is his


    overprotectiveness gone mad, but when he puts it in these terms I realize my baby and I might have a


    harder road ahead of us than I realized. I hadn’t considered myself high risk simply because I’m a


    human carrying a shifter pup, but it makes sense. Again I recall the doctor’s warnings about the size of


    the fetus, the spotting incident and now my persistent stress. I really don’t mind if I suffer, but the idea


    of my baby being at risk is enough to bowl me over.


    “So I can’t say for certain that I’ll never slip up again,” Sinir forges ahead, massaging my arms with


    the pads of his thumbs, “but I promise to always consider your perspective, and consult you whenever I


    can.”


    “Thank you.” I murmur, leaning into his warmth.


    He nods and kisses the top of my head, wrapping his strong arms around me. “Do you still want to


    sleep in your rooms?”


    “Would you let me?” I inquire, already testing his resolve.


    Sinir offers me a wolfish grin. “As long as you let me post enough guards at the door.”


    I chuckle, and shake my head. “I want to stay with you.”


    His muscles untense slightly, and he purrs in contentment. “Good. It’s been a very long night.”


    “You can say that again.” I agree, wriggling out of his hold so I can retrieve a night dress from my


    designated drawer in his dresser.


    A little whileter we’re curled beneath the plush covers of his king sized bed. Sinir always sleeps


    shirtless– not that I’mining – so he’s stretched out on his back as I rest my uninjured cheek on


    his bare pec, immediately soothed by his intoxicating scent. I once asked him why I find smelling him


    so soothing, and he exined that it’s just the pup. Still I can’t help thinking that I would have loved his


    scent even if I weren’t ‘breeding’ as he calls it.


    “Are you sure you’re alright?” Sinir asks, tracing his fingers in soothing patterns down my back.


    “After the attack, I mean.”


    I nod, brushing my cheek over the fine hairs of his chest andnding myself with a tickle in my nose. “It


    was nothing.”


    A loud rumble vibrates against my cheek. “Not to me.” Sinir growls.


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    My hand has been resting on the hard contours of his abs, and I find myself caressing his soft skin,


    hoping to soothe him the way he so often soothes me. “Honestly the most shocking part of the whole


    ordeal was seeing them shift… I’ve never seen anything like it. I still can’t believe it.” In fact that might


    go a long way to exining why the entire ordeal still doesn’t quite feel real to me.


    “Were you very afraid?” Sinir presses, taking advantage of my sudden willingness to talk.


    “I was more afraid for the baby than anything else.” I confess. “That’s what hurt more than anything,


    when I thought that my brashness might have cost it, instead of just me.”


    A low purr rolls to life in Sinir’s chest. “Nothing they did or would have done was caused by you,


    E.”


    I huff out augh. “It seems like there are an awful lot of people telling me things aren’t my faulttely.” I


    muse aloud. “But at a certain point one has to think themon denominator ismon for a reason.”