Sarah asks me:


    “So, Sky, how is New York?,”


    Yan looks me in the eye as if he really wants to know, but not only that, other things too.Published by N?v''elD/rama.Org.


    I answer:


    “Good, nice I think, and…”


    I’m about to say something else, but Sarah interrupts me:


    “Yan didn’t tell me you wereing…”


    We catch ourselves looking into each other’s eyes for a while, I can’t decipher what he is feeling. He takes a deep breath and then grabs a piece of fruit from a te on the table and brings it to his mouth. I think he wants to look casual, I don’t know if I can act like this.


    I just say:


    “He didn’t know.”


    When he looks back at me, kind of surprised that I am enjoying this scene of a piece of fruit going into his mouth, making me wish it was me, I realize that Sarah is still looking at me waiting for me to answer some question she asked.


    I say:


    “I’m sorry. What did you say?”


    She continues as if I didn’t “fly” for a few seconds, making me feel bad for it.


    “I love Times Square.”


    She says a few more things about New York and the trips she has made there and I can’t pay much attention, even though I know I am being rude.


    I haven’t prepared myself to talk to anyone else. Who I want to talk to doesn’t seem to be possible right now.


    Yan takes me by surprise when he asks:


    “How did you find me here?”


    I know he wants to know, but he asks more so that this doesn’t get any more awkward than it already is.


    “Max…”


    I see him straighten up in his chair, he looks ufortable, making me have some percentage of doubt if I did the right thinging here to look for him.


    I continue:


    “He gave me his address.”


    He smiles, not the smile I love and wanted to see, just a discreet smile, then asks again:


    “And how is everybody over there?”


    Wow, even he’s not faking it well today, maybe it’s the surprise of seeing me here, or he just doesn’t want me here, I feel ufortable now, but I answer:


    “Max, kylie, Shane, they are all fine, I talked to Shane and Max a little while ago, they miss you.”


    He has that smile again that I didn’t like. Sarah seems to find it all so interesting, she doesn’t even know that the questions I want to answer are others.


    Her phone rings. She apologizes and answers. I take the opportunity to look at Yan, who looks at me the same way, we are ufortable here. But we need to pretend.


    Sarah says into the phone:


    “No, of course, we will, I just need to change It.”


    She smiles and hangs up. I guess that’s my cue to leave. I get up and say I’ming, Yan doesn’t seem to like what he hears, but he’s not trying hard to keep me here either.


    Sarah says:


    “No, Yan and I are supposed to meet some friends at a party, why don’t youe with us?”


    I look at Yan, but he shows no reaction. I want to be near him, but what do I do?


    She’s still waiting for an answer, I say:


    “I’d better not.”


    She says:


    “Yes unless you have something better to do?”


    I look at her and she smiles waiting for my answer, she insists:


    “Please, Sky?”


    I came back to the hotel with a note with the address of the party.


    I’ve taken a shower and am staring at the note still wearing a bathrobe and sitting on the bed.


    I need to talk to Yan. I know it’s not going to happen at this party, but just imagining that I’m going to be in the same environment as him, well, that’s a good enough reason for me to go there.


    The problem is that he will be with her. They are together, that was very obvious to me. I should have imagined that he would be moving on with his life, the same way that I tried in my way, but it didn’t work out so well.


    After thinking about the pros and cons, I put on a ck dress and a jacket, because it is cold and I let my hair down, leaving my bangs to one side and wearing only a little make-up and nude lipstick.


    I arrive in front of the ce indicated in the address. As I approach the entrance where there are several people in line, one of the security guards asks my name and as I look at him a little confused he says:


    You can go through it, Miss Hills is waiting for you inside.


    I thank him and go ahead. When I am inside the club, Sarah sees me from afar andes towards me saying:


    “How nice that Paul found you!”


    Paul?


    “t’s my security guard. I described you to him and asked him to let you in as soon as you arrived.”


    “Is this your club?”


    She just smiles gracelessly. And says yes. I just say:


    “Wow.”


    She smiles even wider. I hate to admit that she is incredibly nice.


    But I look around for a face, who has a body that I desire so much it hurts.


    And secondster when I’m sitting by the bar talking to Sarah, well, he’sing towards us.


    I look because I can’t stop doing that and go down my eyes over his body as he approaches. Sarah follows my eyes and sees him, damn, I guess I need to fake it better than I am trying so hard to do.


    He moves closer and kisses her quickly, but his eyes return to the mine and he says:


    “Hi, Sky.”


    Just hearing him say my name brings back so many memories.


    This hurts a little more.


    Especially pretending that I couldn’t care less that he is hugging another girl in front of me and he looks nice andfortable, while I struggle to fake that smile on my face.