He raises a brow in question.


    I have been dying to see his body. I can hardly even remember it. Last time I was so ovee with


    arousal; I couldn’t think straight.


    He smiles sexily and tilts his head. My eyes scan the fine specimen in front of me. It’s like getting to


    y with my very own Ken doll. Myst boyfriend was lovely, sure, but he was nowhere near being in


    star’s league. I take off his jacket, hang it in my wardrobe, and then I slowly unbutton his white shirt.


    With each button I unhook, I kiss the skin underneath it. When I make it to his chest I take his erect nipple


    in my mouth. He tenderly puts his hand on the back of my head and kisses my temple.


    I finally get to thest button and I pull his shirt off over his shoulders. My eyes scan the perfect man


    in front of me. All of my Christmases havee at once. How could I have ever doubted my decision to


    do this with him? He is naturally broad and athletic, his arms and chest are muscr. His skin is dark and


    olive, and he has a scattering of dark chest hair that trails delicately to his navel before it disappears into


    his pants. I hold my breath, unable to breathe though my constricted chest.


    He stays silent, allowing me to visually drink him in, as if knowing how badly I need to do this.


    I am inexperienced, and maybe God has sent him to me to fulfill my every fantasy before I have to let


    him go.


    I gently dust the back of my fingers though the hair on his lower stomach before I bend and slowly kiss


    him there.


    I know this is casual sex… I know it. I asked for it. But why does this feel so special and intimate?


    He stands eerily still in the muted light of my room, and I slowly take off his jeans and jocks. My


    breath catches as my eyes drop down between his legs. His cock is broad and long and I can see every


    vein down its engorged length.


    Dear, God, he’s beautiful.


    I bend and kiss him gently. I don’t feel arousal, I feel affection… and it terrifies me.


    Stop it. This is casual.


    I run my fingers through his dark pubic hair and he inhales loudly. I kiss him gently again and his hand


    tenderly brushes my hair back from my forehead as he watches me.


    “What is it?” he whispers.


    I shake my head unable to articte my thoughts. “You are just…” I shake my head.


    “Just what?”


    “So perfect,” I whisper in awe.Text property ? N?vel(D)ra/ma.Org.


    As if sensing my fragility, he bends and kisses me. Hisrge hands hold my face and he pulls me to my


    feet to slowly begin undressing me.


    “Lie down, sweetheart.”


    I lie down and he gently lies down next to me, pulling the nkets over us. He kisses me carefully as


    his hands roam up and down my body.


    Stop it, I remind myself as my heart starts to freefall. At this moment in time I feel like I may literally


    die if he wasn’t here with me tonight.


    “star,” I breathe. I’m overwhelmed, why do I feel like this? My hands hold his face as he kisses


    me.


    “I know,” he whispers as his forehead rests on mine.


    Wey together, the two of us enjoying each other’s bodies, when he rises above me. My legs are


    touching the mattress, and his fingers gently slide in and out of my body as he prepares me for his size. My


    eyes close as he positions himself and slides home in one graceful thrust.


    I  cling  to  him.  He  clings  to  me.  And  as  star  makes  beautiful,  tender  love  to  me,  I e  to  the


    frightening realization.


    When this ends…


    It’s going to hurt.


    The twisted ball in my gut is disturbing, heavy, and it’s riddled with guilt.


    I  have  openly  flirted  and  led  Mark  on  for  twelve  months  and  now  I’m  finally  here  in  the  same


    country as him, I don’t want any part of it. Unfortunately, he just doesn’t do it for me. Although, I am


    wondering if I hadn’t met my Irish dreamboat, would things be different?


    I pick up my wallet and my lip gloss, cing them in my bag before I sit on the bed and stare at the


    phone in my hand. star and I have seen each other every night since we made our pact to be casual,


    and  when  he  has  got  up  to  leave  in  the  middle  of  the  night,  I  have  asked  him  not  to  go…  and  to  my


    surprise, he has stayed with me.


    I’m not sure how casual this is, but I am going out with Mark tonight for dinner to exin that I don’t


    want anything with him. His obvious flirting is cringe worthy and I need it to stop.


    “Knock, knock.”