43: Not what I expected


    Even if I didn''t want to do this, to fight him, I didn''t have a choice. The fight was not in me but when I


    saw the crazed look in his eyes, I knew I had to do something. I would rather die than let him kill my


    child.


    Killing my child equated to killing me also because there was no way I would be able to live with


    myself peacefully knowing I allowed the death of my unborn baby whose sex I had no idea of.


    The lock resonated throughout the room which was supposed to make me feel fear, but all I felt was


    a will to live and give my child the best life I didn''t have - that was snatched away from me.


    No. I wasn''t going to allow this. Even if it meant Alpha Ryven''s death. That thought was fleeting


    even though I had no idea how possible it was.


    "We can do this peacefully or…" Alpha Ryven said and stood feet a few away from me. There was a


    stance to his feet that spoke of how well-trained he was.


    For a moment, it made me question my decision to fight him. But therger part of me that wanted


    my child to live frowned upon the voice.


    I gulped, my eyes darting across the room for anything that could be used as a potential weapon.


    However, I found nothing. Maybe Alpha Ryven predicted the move and decided to move everything


    that could be a weapon out of the room before storming over to Ava''s ce.


    But I doubted he would do that with the rage that burned through him when he walked through


    Ava''s door. Although I knew anything was possible. He was a bastard who toyed with me. And


    foolish me almost fell for it.


    The thought left a bitter taste in my mouth as my head snapped to meet his gaze. He didn''t need to


    say the word. I knew what his eyes held. They held regret and resolve.


    Regret for hurting me? Or for doing what he was about to do? I couldn''t ponder more on it because


    the next minute, he was upon me.


    I ducked away but I hadn''t been fast enough as his ws swiped at my upper arm where my fur


    wasn''t covered. It stung a bit but soon enough, it healed, leaving only a pink-red mark.


    I silently marveled at the healing rate of my wolf. She felt my emotions and awe for her which made


    her emotions flow through me. I couldn''t tell what it was. But I assumed she had azy, proud smirk


    on her face.


    The emotions that flowed through me were a momentary distraction for me as Alpha Ryven took


    that as an opportunity to swipe at me a second time.


    This time, there was a huge gash on my right thigh. Pain flowed through me but I fought it. The


    lessons I took when I came into the pack resurfaced. And I learned to control my breathing. Panic


    was beginning to settle into me.


    And I couldn''t let that happen. If one lets their panic set in in a fight, it means doom for them. And


    doom for me also means doom for my baby. Angry and frustrated tears stung the back of my eyelids


    but that was how far they could go.


    I bent down and transformed fully into my wolf since I found out I couldn''t beat Alpha Ryven in half-


    wolf form. She had been pushing on my forefront for a while now.


    And for a moment, there was nothing but silence in the room as Alpha Ryven shrank back.


    I didn''t know why that happened and there was something in his eyes. It was what I saw in his eyes


    the day I transformed. I hadn''t noticed it before because it went as soon as it came.


    But this time, it stayed. It didn''t go away as he backed away from me. I couldn''t understand at first


    until I got it.


    It was my wolf. How was I so foolish that I didn''t think about it? I was higher in rank than any other


    Alpha. I was a direct descendant of the moon goddess. Was this why my wolf wanted me to find my


    strength myself and not help me when I needed her the most?


    It all began to make sense. She wanted me to find my strength and not rely on what I was but


    rather, on who I am. How could I expect someone to love me for who I was when I wasn''t confident


    in myself?


    Maybe Alpha Ryven was right when he said I was foolish. Not for the reason he deemed me but for


    another reason I didn''t like to say to myself.


    I watched from the eyes of my wolf as Alpha Ryven got to his knees with pain written all over his


    face. His hold on the can where the wolfsbane was poured, loosened and fell on the ground, rolling


    away from him.


    I was confused. What was going on?


    Was it Athena''s doing? I knew even if I asked her, she wouldn''t tell. A little part of me liked that she


    sometimes did that. She was like a mother bird teaching her little ones how to fly by dropping them


    from the sky. Not because she doesn''t care about them, but because she wants them to be able to


    fly on their own. It was teaching them the hard but most effective way.


    Athena wanted me to fly. To be able to stand my ground against anyone, Alpha or not. But judging


    by the look on Alpha Ryven''s face, I guessed he knew about it. Was that the reason he brought the


    wolfsbane? And was that the reason Athena, my wolf, was so willing toe out and fight him?


    Was she also tired of his cruel ways?


    She might not understand what I went through as a child because she wasn''t there. But she had


    ess to my memories and might feel a bit of sympathy for me.


    To be frank, I didn''t know her. Maybe it was because I hadn''t really tried to get the information out of


    her, that''s why she wasn''t willing to give out much. She has so much knowledge that sometimes I


    get scared of the type of wolf I was given.


    I heard people talk about how their wolves are their best friends who talk about anything and


    everything. But mine was different. Everything about me was so different. Maybe it''s because I am


    different. Maybe because I had been different from the start but was too blind to see it.


    It was in my eyes. People talk about how my eyes glowed when I was pissed which was so rare


    because I hardly got angry. I thought it was them just trying to make me feel inferior more than I


    already was.


    It was the eyes of my wolf. She had always been there. Then why hasn''t she shown herself? Why


    did she let them bully me? Did she derive joy from seeing me sad and feeling like a total waste of


    space?


    "Stop thinking nonsense. I have my reasons for doing what I did." Athena said to me. I wanted to


    lash out at her.


    "Take over from here. You have the power to render him incapacitated. Justmand him.


    Everything will go in your favor," she said.


    "Why are you telling me all these now?" I asked her, trying to control the anger simmering inside of


    me just ready to burst like a volcano.


    "You weren''t ready to hear this."


    "Hear what?" I asked her and she smiled at me. I felt her glee. This was the moment she had been


    waiting for.


    But I feared for what I was about to discover. What was it that made her wait so long? Something


    told me it would change everything. Not like the betrayal of the Beta''s wife had changed something


    in me. But this would be bigger.


    I wanted to run away from the truth I was getting closer to. But that would only confirm what the


    bastard kneeling at my feet had said.


    Têxt belongs to N?velDrama.Org.


    Without giving me a chance to prepare myself, Athena shrank to the back of my mind, pushing me


    outward. I felt the fur go back into my arms painlessly.


    But the clothes I had put on earlier were still intact. How was that possible? But I was more shocked


    seeing Alpha Ryven still on the floor, sweat coating his forehead and soaking his shirt.


    What a fool. He was fighting themand.


    However, it didn''t lessen my surprise about the knowledge that themand hadn''t expired as my


    wolf went to the back of my mind.


    Somehow, I didn''t believe it when she told me I could control him.


    "Look at me," I said to him but like I expected, nothing happened. Alpha Ryven was looking at the


    floor with a painful expression.


    "Say it like you mean it. Let every fiber of your being be in resonance with the sentence. He''s an


    Alpha. You''ll need more strength to control him," Athena came to my aid for the first time.


    I swallowed, closed my eyes, and willed all the fibers in my being toe to life. Something in me


    changed. It was like I was breaking out of an old skin. And a new one emerged. I couldn''t exin it.


    It felt -


    Surreal.


    Something that only happened in books. But here I was experiencing it. Feeling every moment of it


    and relishing in the feeling.


    "Look at me," I spoke once more. This time, I could feel the power in my words. And I knew Alpha


    Ryven would look at me. He did. However, there was fear on his face. What was I missing?


    "What are you not telling me?" I asked. My heart pounded in my veins at what I was about to


    discover.


    "You need to be specific." He grunted in pain. My brows furrowed above my bitten lips. How was I


    supposed to know what I was missing?


    "Your parents," Athena''s voice came to me in a whisper. It was like she didn''t want to break the spell


    in the room even though her voice was only in my head. Or she didn''t want to make me lose focus.


    I looked into his eyes. They hardened. He knew I had a talk with my wolf and I was about to ask the


    question. I was both eager and afraid to hear the answer.


    "What happened to my parents?" I whispered so low I feared he wouldn''t hear me. But the slight


    widening of his eyes told me he heard.


    I expected him to try to fight it, blurt it, andugh in my face because he was a sick bastard. But


    nothing prepared me for what he said next.


    "My father and I killed them." He growled while I gasped and recoiled both externally and internally.


    My insides churned with… rage? fear? I couldn''t tell.


    However, he didn''t stop there, "We killed them because they were as useless as a penny with a


    hole. If given the chance again, I will kill them a second time."