19: Feelings


    Sophia


    I heard Alpha Ryven’s sister suck in a breath. And I knew there would never be peace in the house


    as long as I was there. Daring to look at her face, I took a peak at it and saw it was as dark as a


    thunderstorm.


    “What?!” She scoffed and red down at me. “I’ll have to leave for her? You’re not being serious,


    are you?” he asked while she crossed her hand across her chest. I could feel her angering out


    in waves. I didn''t know the kind of misunderstanding thaty before them. But whatever it was, I


    was sure it wasn''t something that could be settled in a day.


    I gulped and dropped my fork on the table which made Alpha Ryven look at me. I got up slowly and


    made my way to the way I came and asked a maid for directions to my room.


    She directed me there and I sat down in the bed with apprehension. I could not understand what


    was going on. And the more I thought about it, the more I felt I would lose my mind. Everything


    around me just seemed to have a way of going bad.


    It was probably due to the bad luck I had since I was born that made my parents die when I was


    small. I tried to tell myself multiple times that I was only a person with emotions who would feel that


    way. But doing that didn''t help either.


    The door was opened from behind and Alpha Ryven walked in with a calm expression on his face. I


    didn''t want to look him in the eyes so I avoided his gaze. He seemed to notice and came to sit in the


    bed with me, his scent making me dizzy.


    He has a masculine smell that wants me to run into his arms and he, in turn, will wrap it around me,


    telling me everything would be okay. And also telling me all my fears were in my head. However,


    nothing of that sort happened.


    With soft fingers, he turned my face to him so I was looking into his eyes. There was nothing in his


    eyes. I couldn''t know what he was thinking because he guarded himself so well. It was unlike me


    who doesn''t know how to guard her emotions. I hated it. I hated how everyone close to me knew


    exactly what I was thinking just like an open book.


    "I''m sorry you had to see that," he said while he pushed a stray hair away from my face. It made my


    heart lurch in my throat. It was the most romantic gesture I had ever experienced. And I wanted to


    tell myself not to get ahead of myself by falling for the big bad Alpha. But his gaze made me feel


    something deep within. Something deades to life.


    I guarded my heart against that. Against any form of heartbreak that would protect me from loving


    the wrong person. But soon, I hade to realize that loving someone wasn''t part of one''s ability to


    control.


    Your heart didn''t give a warning when it wanted to love someone. You just find yourself yearning for


    the person, craving his touch and the way his eyes lock on yours. That was what I feared I would


    eventuallye to crave from someone, from the wrong person who doesn''t love me as much as I


    woulde to love him.


    "You seem lost. Did something happen?" He asked me and scooted closer to me, bringing my


    hands to his rough ones. I smiled shyly and shook my head no at him.


    "Then tell me what''s on your mind," he said and I looked up to find sincerity in his eyes. His eyes


    held something in them at that moment and before I could decipher what it was, it was gone just like


    the wind.


    "I have no idea why I''m here," I confessed to him and he smiled lovingly at me.


    "Is that why you are stressing yourself out?" He chuckled which made a nice sound, making heat


    pool in my lower belly. He was so cute when heughed. The way his eyes crinkled at the edges


    and the way his lips rode up in a way that made me want to watch himugh.


    He continued staring into my eyes and began drawing light circles at the back of my hand. I couldn''t


    deny it, he was making me fall for him. The subdued way he touched me in ces I never knew I


    could be touched and feel loved by it.


    It was a small gesture but it spoke volumes of how he thought of me. I''ve heard stories of how men


    try to getdies to bed with them from their little gestures. I couldn''t be sure Alpha Ryven was one


    of them because why would he want to get in bed with me when there were tons of women who


    threw themselves at him each day without remorse?


    "There you are again, lost in your thoughts," he sighed and squeezed my hand. "I brought you here


    because I found out about the way you were being treated in your pack. I didn''t like it. You deserve


    better than to be treated like a piece of trash. And I knew you could achieve so much with the right


    guidance," he said and I sucked in a breath.


    My hands were mmy from sweat. It shook slightly from the emotion that rocked me. No one had


    ever thought of me that way. I wanted to tell Alpha Ryven everything that was going on with me. To


    open up to someone for once. Someone who cares about me enough to think of a way to help me.


    "Hush, we don''t want you ruining your pretty face with tears," he said and scooted closer to me so I


    was resting my head on his broad shoulders. Everything felt right with him by my side. Like we were


    made for one another. But we weren''t.


    It pained me greatly that he would never think of me the same way my heart was beginning to beat


    for him. It was humorous about how I was slowly falling for him when I left my mate barely six hours


    ago.


    I hugged him tighter, relishing the feel of him against me. I half expected him to touch me intimately.


    But he respected me which made my heart beat a little faster for him. His hands were at my back,


    taping gently while I calmed down.


    "Thank you," I said as I shyly disentangled from him. He smiled down at me when I dared to look up


    at him. He thought of giving me some space which I was grateful for and walked up to the couch to


    sit down, facing me.


    Looking at him from a distance made him seem untouchable. Like I could nevere up to his


    level no matter how much I tried. My heart broke at the realization that whatever feeling that started


    to grow for him should be killed before it became a problem that couldn''t be handled.


    Thest thing I needed at his pack was to let my stupid feelings for him get in the way of bing


    a better person for me. And to my parents who would have wanted more than I could ever dream


    about.


    "The girl I was talking to in the room is my younger sister. I guessed you must have seen the


    resemnce between us," he sighed and ran a hand through his hair but stopped himself, dropping


    it back down to his thigh.


    He bent forward, his hands resting on his knees as he looked at the table. For a moment, I saw


    sadness sh in his eyes before he could fully bend his head forward. His hair fell to his eyes giving


    him an underworldly glow.


    He continued while I waited for him without interruption and being as silent as I could be. "We fell


    apart when our mother died because…" he stopped and raised his head. Because what? I wanted


    to ask him but saw his eyes zed over which meant he was mindlinking someone. Probably his


    beta.


    An alluring smile stretched his lips and I was confused about what could bring such a smile when a


    moment ago, he seemed like the world had crumbled over him. He chuckled and his eyes returned


    to normal.


    "I have great news. Everything you need for your training is ready. You will be starting tomorrow


    morning by six," he beamed.


    "Six? I don''t understand. Why would I be training?" I asked with furrowed brows. A wider smile


    stretched his lips and he stood up, walking toward me with arge stride. I had never seen anyone


    so happy before which made me eager for the news.


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    But something in me told me whatever he had to say wouldn''t be something I would like to hear.