《In Plain Sight》
The Problem With Seeing Everything
Disclaimer / Copyright Notice
I¡¯m writing this story slowly, deeply, and truthfully¡ªfor anyone who''s ever been told they¡¯re ¡°too much,¡± ¡°too intense,¡± or ¡°too strange to belong.¡±
If you connect with Naya, thank you for being here. Updates will follow.
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The first time I saw through someone, I was ten.
Not ¡°I see through your bull (though, yes, that too).
I mean I saw his face ripple.
His reflection blinked a second too late.
His smile stayed on just a little too long¡ªlike it had to think about being a smile.
I told my teacher. She looked at me like I¡¯d grown a second head.
I told the nurse. She checked my pupils and asked if I hit my head.
I told my mom.
She told me to stop being weird in public.
That¡¯s when I learned three things:
- I¡¯m very good at noticing things.
- Most people hate being noticed.
- The world is not what it looks like¡ªand no one wants to talk about it.
I¡¯ve always seen too much. Thought too much. Felt everything.
The terms changed over the years¡ªADHD, HPI, gifted, ¡°sensitive,¡± ¡°intense,¡± ¡°not living up to potential.¡±
School said I was a genius.
Deadlines said otherwise.
I don¡¯t ¡°hyperfocus for twelve hours.¡± I get lost for five minutes and forget what I was doing.
I spiral down rabbit holes for days, collecting encyclopedias of things no one needs.
I procrastinate until the anxiety explodes, and then I burn myself out trying to fix what I couldn¡¯t start.
Sometimes I can¡¯t follow simple instructions.
Sometimes I forget how to begin.
I¡¯m not lazy.
I¡¯m not careless.
I¡¯m just wired like a storm that won¡¯t land.
Now I¡¯m thirty-two.
I have a PhD in Anomalous Systems Engineering¡ªwhich is a polite way of saying:
I study patterns that shouldn¡¯t exist.
The data that doesn¡¯t behave.
The math that makes people nervous.
This morning I spilled coffee on my lecture notes, left my ID in the fridge, and still beat the department chair to work.
Victory is relative.
My 9:30 lecture is on Anomalous Pattern Integrity in Chaotic Systems.
Which is ironic, since half my students can¡¯t remember which room we¡¯re in unless I post it, email it, and pin it in three group chats.
I set up at the podium, open my laptop, and pull my notes from the university cloud.
The projector flickers once¡ªbecause it¡¯s older than half the student body¡ªand then settles.
¡°Take weather,¡± I say, pacing slowly. ¡°You can¡¯t predict the exact temperature next Tuesday, but you know it won¡¯t be 800 degrees and raining frogs. Probably.¡±
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A few students laugh.
The rest stare like I¡¯ve personally offended their sleep schedule.
I scroll down to a fractal pattern, zooming in.
I love this part¡ªwhen the noise fades and they¡¯re actually listening.
¡°Order isn¡¯t the opposite of chaos,¡± I tell them.
¡°It¡¯s hidden inside it. That¡¯s the trick.¡±
That¡¯s when it happens.
Third row, left side. A student shifts in his chair.
And for one half-second, his shadow doesn¡¯t follow.
It lags. Just a beat.
And when it catches up¡ª
It¡¯s wrong.
Horns. Claws. Just for a blink.
The shape his body shouldn¡¯t make.
I freeze mid-sentence.
His eyes meet mine¡ªonly for a moment.
But it¡¯s like being looked at by someone wearing a mask inside their own face.
Not hostile.
Not human, either.
Then he blinks.
Smiles faintly.
Looks down at his notes.
I blink too.
The projector has already switched slides. I didn¡¯t touch anything.
¡°Sorry,¡± I say out loud. ¡°Bit of a tech hiccup.¡±
No one reacts.
No one else saw it.
Of course they didn¡¯t.
They never do.
I finish the lecture.
The student is gone before I can ask a single question.
I pack up slower than usual.
Mostly because I don¡¯t want to walk past that seat.
It¡¯s empty now, of course. The student with the lagging shadow probably vanished five minutes before the end of class¡ªlike he never existed.
I tell myself it was the lighting.
I tell myself I imagined it.
I¡¯ve told myself that before.
I take the back stairs down to the staff hallway. It¡¯s quieter there. Dimmer.
Smells faintly of printer ink and burnt coffee from the cursed department Keurig.
I stop by the mailroom out of habit.
Mostly I get admin memos, campus-wide spam, and once, a threatening letter from Facilities about unplugging my office heater.
But today¡
There¡¯s a manila envelope sitting in my cubby.
No name. No logo. Just thick paper folded inside.
My name is typed on the front. That¡¯s it. No sender. No return info.
No ¡°From the Desk of Someone Important.¡±
I glance around. The hallway¡¯s empty. Just the hum of the vending machine and the dull clink of someone¡¯s forgotten lunch spoon hitting plastic in the microwave.
I open it.
One sheet. Heavy stock. No watermark.
Just six words, centered on the page:
you see us dont you
No caps. No punctuation.
Not a question. A statement.
My heart doesn¡¯t pound. I don¡¯t drop the paper.
I just¡ go very, very still.
Because whoever sent this didn¡¯t just guess.
They know what I saw.
What I¡¯ve been seeing.
I fold the paper in half.
Then again.
Then again.
Tuck it into the back pocket of my notebook.
I¡¯m not ready to panic.
Not yet.
But something¡¯s shifting.
I can feel it.
The pattern¡¯s cracking.
And someone else is watching me now.