《Damn Junk!》 Murphys Law The whiteboard was covered in chaotic scribbles¡ªequations, half-baked theories, and sketches of audacious theory many would even consider impossibility.. The scientist, hunched over, gripped a red marker between his teeth while feverishly adjusting components of his machine. His lab was a disaster zone of tangled wires, stacks of notes, and a ridiculous number of empty coffee cups. The smell of burnt circuits hung in the air. His fingers were stained with ink and grease, his mind a chaotic whirlwind of ideas, calculations, and insane possibilities. "Alright, focus, focus¡­ If the displacement factor is maintained while the consciousness transfer aligns with the harmonic frequency¡ª" He muttered. Suddenly, he stopped and readjust while furrowing his brow. "No, no, that would kill me." He scribbled furiously on the board, gritting his teeth. His hair were messy and his eyebag makes it apparent that he had faced multiple sleepless night. Equations came together, fell apart, were rewritten. His mind was a hurricane, his hands a blur. He wiped sweat from his forehead, eyes darting between the machine and his notes. His heartbeat pounded in his ears. He had been at this for days. No, weeks. Maybe longer. He had lost track of time. His food supply consisted of half-eaten granola bars, and his sleep cycle had been completely obliterated. But it didn''t matter. Because he was close. So damn close. "C''mon, baby, work with me here," he coaxed the machine, tapping a panel with the wrench. He flipped a switch. A small spark. The hum of a capacitor charging. Something shifted. A reading on the monitor flickered to life. Numbers aligned in a way that actually made sense. His heart skipped a beat. He reached for his notepad, checking his calculations. "Oh, oh shit, that''s it. That''s it!" He grinned wildly. "Yeahhh baby! HELL YESSS!" He practically vibrated with excitement, fists pumping in the air. He did it. It worked. He had cracked time travel! Well, kind of. He wasn''t entirely sure how smoothly it would function, but the theory was sound. It would work when he needed it. And that was the key. But as the euphoria settled, another thought crept into his mind. This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it. This was more than just a machine. This was history, power, absolute dominance over time itself.... The world has one time traveler and it would be ??????. ?all those awards, the recognition, the world falling at my feet in awe. The Nobel Prize? heck, with this. i can even do anything.. the world''s my oyster!? He lampooned over his thoughts as he comsiders each outcome. "maybe, i shouldn''t even share this invention at all." A slow grin spread across his face. Why should he let anyone else in on this? He could rewrite the past, shape the future, become something more than just a scientist. He could be a god. He could topple empires before they rose, manipulate the stock market decades in advance as well as manipulate destiny itself. The thought was intoxicating. "I could do anything¡­" he muttered to himself, eyes gleaming. "Anything." He let out a slow, satisfied exhale. Tired from the long work and finally having his work paid off, he decided to just go out the basement and rest in his room. On the way, he was hopping, jumping in joy while imagining all the possible ways he would test the machine out¡ª And accidentally knocked over the simmering pot of soup his wife had been cooking. The clatter of metal against the floor sent a chill down his spine. The scent of spices filled the air. Time seemed to slow as he frowned at the mess he had just created. He had seconds before the consequences of his actions caught up with him. His wife hadn''t been very happy with him ever since he prioritised the invention over her. His eyes darted towards stairs leading to the basement. "...i was just thinking of testing the machine out, guess it''s now or nothin huh?" he muttered. Wthout further thought, he walked back to it and started setting up the machine. he clicked the commanding code on the machine, specifying this location and the number about a few minutes ago. The machine stirred, shook, and then screamed. As he rest his hands on the machine, it began pulling from the dep of his body. Electricity cracked through the air. A high-pitched whining filled the room as the machine trembled violently, bolts snapping free, circuits overloading. The air itself twisted, distorting as if reality itself had been punched in the gut. The hum became a roar. His vision blurred. His breath caught in his throat. Then¡ª With a blinding flash. He was gone. --- He was floating. Or falling. Or both. The concept of time felt distant, like a river he could see but never touch. Colors swirled around him in unnatural ways¡ªbrilliant, shifting hues that made no sense. Shapes formed and unformed, both abstract and hard to make sense of. The machine swam through the stream of time, tumbling, sinking lower, lower than it should have. He reached out, but his hands¡ªwhere were his hands? he could feel his consciousness attached to the machine. He observed and came to a realization, that he had no eyes but could see things. ?was this the 6th senses said to exist? my soul..? While waiting, his mind wandered to his equations as well as all the theorem he written on the whiteboard. ?a machine that utilise quantum computer''s law-breaking data transfer and data storing, transitioning one''s conscious onto data stored inside, and throu breaking boundary of dimension. leaps in the gap, after landing would send it''s user''s mind onto target within chosen time frame.? he yapped. recalling each and every details (tldr; hijack anyone''s body across any time or any space by sending his consciousness to parasitize their body.) As he remembered some theory he written, he noticed... ?wait. if it''s 10 minute time travel, shouldn''t i have landed already?? he knew he couldn''t be wrong, since the time travel first succeeded. He tried controlling the machine but the tool was made to travel on it''s own without driver. All because of his laziness ?wait. no, no, no, no- STOP!? He kept begging ?STOP!? He tried calling out but his conscious was just a data now. and the machine kept going. his plies fallen to deaf ears... He quickly regreted his decision of making it autopilot. Everything lurched. His stomach flipped. He crashed. it felt like he had woke up from a dream where he fell down from somewhere high. He was¡­ heavy. His breath rumbled in his chest. He blinked, trying to focus, but the world felt too big, too strange. Something felt¡­ wrong. Everything felt different.. He turned his head. His massive, birdlike physique. ?Oh no.? His heart pounded. He lifted his arm¡ªno, his clawed limb. His skin was thick, feathery, and ?????????????????????? exactly like that of a Velociraptor. ?why do i have a tail???? He asked to himself in a panic, sensing the alien feeling of this body. ?even my teeths feels weird. what on earth is this...? he panicked, trying to make sense of the situation. Then he saw it. The machine, his brilliant, one-of-a-kind, miracle maker, moving through the sky like a firework. It spun, plummeting, then vanished beyond some mountain. he was still processing the situation. A deep exhale rattled from his chest as he stared blankly at the horizon. ?shit.? Welcome to- what the hell? First things first: walking. Should be easy, right? Two legs, balance, a little waddle¡ªsimple. Wrong. The moment he tried to take a step, his new, oversized claws dug into the dirt, and his tail¡ªhis new tail¡ªswung like a wrecking ball, nearly knocking him off his feet. He flailed, barely catching himself, and let out a noise that could only be described as an undignified squawk. ?Okay. Not as great as I thought.? He steadied himself, took another step. This time, he adjusted for the tail. Another step. Then another. And just like that, he was moving. Awkwardly, sure, but moving. He took a deep breath and flexed his claws, feeling the raw power in his limbs. His new body was strong. Agile. Efficient. He crouched low, then jumped¡ª swish He launched at least ten feet into the air, completely overshooting his mark, flailed midair like a malfunctioning jetpack, and crashed face-first into a bush. ?Alright. Not doing that again.? He spat out a leaf and shook himself off. Now that mobility was sort of handled, he took in his surroundings. The place looked like a nature documentary before humans started bulldozing everything. The trees were as massive as a skyscrapper. Ferns the size of couches sprouted everywhere, and weird, alien flowers oozed some kind of iridescent goo. The noises was just as exotic. Not the deep, bellowing roars Hollywood had promised. No, these prehistoric beasts had the vocal range of dying bagpipes. Some honked like angry geese. Others screeched like they were in a horror movie. One in the distance let out a noise so ungodly it sounded like a kazoo having a fight with a blender. He sighed. ?As I expected, these guys are like birds.? Which made sense. After all, hippos had skulls that looked like demonic kaiju skeletons, but in reality, they were just chunky water cows. Dinosaurs probably had the same PR problem. Still, no time to dwell on scientific misunderstanding. He had bigger problems¡ªlike the whole stranded-in-the-past-with-no-idea-what-to-do-next situation. If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. He plopped down onto a log, staring at the horizon. ?Alright, let''s think. I intended to go ten minutes into the past. Instead, I got launched into dino era from 66 million years ago. Given how wildly this machine screwed up, another failure might kill me. Or worse¡ªturn me into a trilobite or something.? That alone should''ve made him panic, but then he thought about it. Dinosaurs went extinct long before humans even showed up. Meaning? No major butterfly effect that could erase civilization. His future apartment, his phone, his WiFi? is Still going to exist. Small victories. But that still left one massive question. ?What the hell do I do now?? ?Option 1, Go straight for the machine maybe?? he first considered in a heartbeat but was quickly swayed by his logic. That thing crashed way past the mountains. There were likely predators, obstacles, and who knows what kind of prehistoric nightmares lurking in between. Charging in blind was a way to get yourself killed. ?Option 2 Say screw it, leave the machine, and just... live here?? random thought pops out but he dismissed it. he can''t give up just like that. Yeah. No. He was not about to settle down in a time period that doesn''t have a toilet. skibidi or not, he needed them. ?Option 3 get something like tools or ally, survive, then plan for extraction.? he thought of another way. Not ideal, but logical. Rushing in without resources was suicide. If he wanted any shot at getting back, he needed a strategy. He exhaled through his nostrils¡ªflaring them way more dramatically than expected. ?Right. Step one- don''t die.? His stomach immediately growled. Forcing him to change his plan ?okay, new step one.. don''t starv.? He thought back to The Book. The book that every nerd with an apocalyptic fear of civilization collapsing had read at some point¡ª"How to Rebuild Society from Scratch." It had everything. survival tactics, fire-starting techniques, how to manufacture aspirin. He could almost see the diagrams flipping through his brain. Then he looked around. The terrain was garbage. Thick forests, alien-looking plants with wood color and pores like they breath, and¡ªoh yeah¡ªhe had no idea what was poisonous in this time period. If he ate the wrong thing, he''d find out real fast if velociraptors could get food poisoning. ?So, Plan B... watch the locals.? He decided. He crouched low, scanning the area. A herd of duck-like dinosaurs waddled by, honking at each other in a way that was weirdly similar to gossiping neighbors. A smaller, feathery predator was perched on a log, lazily sunbathing like it had zero responsibilities. Okay. So far, it looks like another one of those National Geographic episode. But then a realization hit him. If he wanted to get that machine back? He couldn''t do it alone. He needed allies. Manpower. Dinosaurpower. more specifically a pack of velociraptor. It made perfect sense. Strength in numbers, safety, and they would know how to survive in this world better than he did. If he could integrate himself, become alpha¡ªthen he would have a small army at his command. The question was how. and that''s when he spotted it. A Quetzalcoatlus¡ªone of the biggest flying creatures to ever exist. lying on the ground, injured. One of its wings was bent at a bad angle, and it looked like it had crash-landed. With how dirty it was. His machine had hit something when it came to this era. and it was this fellow right here. ?...Well, crap.? He hesitated for a moment before letting out a sigh. ?I guess you''re coming with me, big guy? Carefully, he approached the massive creature, trying his best not to get his face pecked off. The Quetzalcoatlus eyed him, but it was too exhausted to even move.. That made things easier for him. Grunting, he lifted the injured creature onto his back. It was heavier than expected, but his raptor muscles held strong. He took one last look at the distant mountain, where his machine had crashed. It was far. Too far. But he know he''ll get there. He had to. Because if he didn''t? He was going to be the first time traveler in history to get permanently stuck as an oversized murder chicken. And that was not gonna be an option. New raptor in the block Carrying a skyscraper-sized murder stork was not how he envisioned his first day as a dinosaur. The Quetzalcoatlus let out a pitiful honk, shifting slightly on his back. He adjusted his grip, muscles burning as he trudged through the dense underbrush. "Yup. This is my life now. Hauling prehistoric little planes while trying not to die," he muttered. Still, this wasn''t even the worst part of his day. That honor belonged to the realization that he had no idea what the hell he was doing. "Okay, step one," he grunted, stepping over a massive root, "find shelter. Step two, figure out how to eat without poisoning myself. Step three, don''t get eaten by something bigger." The forest was a fever dream¡ªtowering ferns, weird bioluminescent fungi, and trees that looked suspiciously like they could eat him. Vines coiled around trunks thicker than his old lab''s water tanks, and somewhere in the distance, a deep, weird noise rumbled through the canopy. "Oh great," he grumbled. "Haven''t been this uncomfortable walking around since I got bullied in high school. Nostalgia, am I right?" Yeah. He needed a plan¡ªfast. Every part of him screamed to go get the time machine, but charging straight into prehistoric chaos? Grade-A terrible idea. He was off-course, wildly unprepared, and if this world had one thing, it was way too many things that could eat him. Rushing in blind? Dead. Staying put forever? Also dead. Playing it smart? Maybe not dead. He exhaled through his raptor nostrils, flaring them more dramatically than necessary. ?Alright. Priorities: shelter, food, backup.? He adjusted the Quetzalcoatlus on his back. ?And you, my big feathery friend, are going to help me with that.? Carefully, he set the giant bird-lizard down, gripping its limp form with clawed hands and powerful jaws to drag it forward. Narrating to his bored self, he imagined, ?I show up to the pack. They see stranger. I bring them giant KFC. They see a hero.? Speaking of which¡ª Time to find the locals. --- The jungle was alive with movement. Tiny, feathery dinosaurs darted through the undergrowth, snapping at insects. A group of armored, porcupine-looking creatures (Ankylosaurs?) rumbled by in the distance, clubbed tails swinging like wrecking balls. You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. But he was looking for something specific. Velociraptors. And as if the universe heard him, he found them. A small pack¡ªmaybe five or six¡ªlounging near a rocky outcrop, basking in the sun like a lfeathered lizard with murder in their eyes and extra skinny build. His heart pounded. ?Alright, don''t be an idiot. Play this right, or they''ll rip you apart faster than a Black Friday sale.? He slowly set the Quetzalcoatlus down and took a step forward. Instantly, heads snapped up. Eyes locked onto him. One of them¡ªa larger, scarred-up one¡ªrattled its throat and stood, tail swaying. Alpha. He took a slow breath. ?Okay. No sudden movements.? They could smell it. Instinct told them: This guy doesn''t belong. Time to fix that. Lowering his posture, he mimicked their stance. ?God, this is awkward. How do NatGeo guys and researchers do this?!? The alpha tilted its head. Another raptor let out a low chirp, creeping closer. He exhaled. ?One shot at this.? So, naturally, he did the most logical thing imaginable. He screeched. "QUACK." The pack froze. The alpha narrowed its eyes. A long, tense moment stretched between them. His mind swirled, heart pounding in his raptor chest. ?Oh lord, is this what every unfunny comedian feels like?? He mulled. His internal voice spiraled. ?God, help me. I''m starting to question all my life choices. But hey! I''m the idiot who decided to play god with a time machine. What right do I have asking for salvation now?? Then¡ª The alpha screeched back. "skree." The tension cracked like a dropped test tube. Backing out would be a mistake. He needed to own this. He ripped a chunk off the Quetzalcoatlus and tossed it toward them. Carefully, he made another noise, thinking, ?i sure hope i did it right..? The raptors nudged the meat before cautiously eating it. ?Okay. Good start.? He tossed another chunk of meat before forcing out another voice. "QUACK!" The raptors reacted strangely but kept accepting his offering. Then, as if in some bizarre prehistoric imitation¡­ One of them quacked back. His eye twitched. he could almost hear an imaginary voice inside his head saying "charisma check, successful." ?Do I look like some kind of deranged idol throwing food at fans? damnit, i''m going insane.? He commented, his attempt of communicating with them ended up looking like someone screaming and doing some emote. Regardless, the pack was warming up to him. He settled amongst them¡ªawkwardly, but progress was progress. He immediately took a note of the steps ahead. ?step one... thrive? ?step two. Become king of the dinosaurs.? ?Step three. Get the damn time machine back.? As the raptors rested, full from their unexpected feast, he seized the opportunity. With difficulty, he scavenged sticks and stones, clumsily crafting makeshift tools. Hours passed as he fumbled through the process, claws and lack of dexterity working against him. ?Well,? he sighed, examining his crude handiwork, ?velociraptors were built for biting, not arts and crafts. you don''t see them makin any cave mosaic..? Soon after, the pack stirred, stretching out and preparing to move. He strapped the little tools he made¨C to his back and tagged along with them. Traversing the jungle, he studied them. ?They''re like lions¡ªalways on the prowl.? Except, not really. They weren''t strong apex predators, just cunning little demons who relied on teamwork and persistence to eat. ?wait¡­ they''re nothing like lions. What was I even thinking?? He shook his head He noted mentally that his tendency to think too much remains even in a foreign body.. ?tch, My brain''s running wild again.? Being alone in an era with no music, no internet, no civilization? A special kind of hell for a modern man. The ominous rattles of ancient creatures had officially replaced his playlist. His only company now is raptors instead of beautiful wife at home. ?leah, popcorn, netflix and chill... i miss you.? ?Lucky I got stuck as a raptor instead of an Ankylosaurus. Those things have the brainpower of a brick,? Honestly, considering how screwed up the time machine was, he should be grateful he wasn''t something worse¡ª Then he saw it. A shadow. A huge one at that. His stomach dropped. ?No way.? That wasn''t¡ª It was. The pack froze. His eyes widened. His mind screamed. ?Oh. Crap.? Towering ahead, feathered but monstrous, was the last thing he wanted to see this soon. The apex predator. The prehistoric nightmare. Tyrannosaurus Its massive frame loomed like a living mountain, blending the worst traits of birds and lizards into something that made every instinct in his body scream: RUN. But he couldn''t. Not yet. Because no matter how his instinct screamed, he knew not to let his body dictate his choices. He had to stay calm ?if i recall, their unique build makes them relatively weak at grappling, but with raptor''s small body... can i do it?? Claws n Conflict Having a Tyrannosaurus rex in front of you is a great way to remind yourself how fragile life is. And judging by the way his entire velociraptor pack was practically radiating fear, Kerl knew damn well they all had the same thought: Do. Not. Move. His mind raced at a million miles per hour, calculating every possible outcome, yet something strange happened¡ª The T. rex¡­ didn''t care? It barely even glanced at them, lumbering forward on tree-trunk legs, focused entirely on something else. "Hey! I''m tasty enough, get back here and hunt me, bruh!" he inwardly complained¡ªthough, in all honesty, he was really hoping the big guy wouldn''t turn back. As the apex predator disappeared into the jungle, Kerl let out a breath he didn''t know he was holding. He mulled over the situation. ?So I''m not even worth the effort?? That stung his pride a little. But it made sense. Scientists theorized that T. rexes weren''t built for chase-hunting¡ªtoo big, too slow. They were more of an ambush predator. Nice to have that confirmed firsthand. ?Hooray for science¡­ if only I wasn''t running for my life.? As a velociraptor, Kerl was small, fast, and nimble¡ªexactly the kind of prey a T. rex wouldn''t bother with. For a predator that size, something as tiny as a raptor just wasn''t worth the energy. Watching it walk away, he couldn''t help but think. ?Man, if I find the time machine, I''m gonna revolutionize paleontology. Solving dinosaur mysteries just by being here is kinda OP.? His mind wandered. For a moment, he imagined himself returning to the modern world as a revolutionary scientist. "We love you, mr Kerl Erde! You''re the best!" Reporters would gush, cameras flashing in his face. The author''s content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. Maybe even¡­ she would come back. His wife. The one who hadn''t kissed him in eight months ever since he started working on the time machine. He could almost hear her voice¡ª "erde..." Silhouette of her calling him. ?leah? he called back. A sharp screech snapped him back to reality. He turned around and it was his Dino underling. ?Right... Dinosaur body. Prehistoric death world. No time for daydreaming.? All of this¡ªthe madness, the struggle¡ªwas thanks to the Deus Ex Machina that was his shitty time machine. If he wanted to return? He had to find it. But even if the T. rex wasn''t interested in him¡­ he sure as hell was interested in it. He screeched, grabbing the attention of his raptor crew, who all immediately looked at him like he had grown a second head. Then, using his tail, he flung one of his handmade weapons straight at the behemoth. It landed. Right on the T. rex''s skull. The massive predator froze. Then, slowly, it turned its head, nostrils flaring. ?Oh. Oh shit.? Before it could react further, Kerl struck first. seeing this opportunity, his pack followed to do the same. They swarmed, biting, slashing, and ripping into the T. rex like prehistoric piranhas. Kerl kept chucking whatever makeshift weapons he had¡ªropes, stones, sharpened sticks. ?HAH! My impeccable aim, honed by YEARS with Call of Duty!? he boasted inwardly. The T. rex roared, shaking the ground as it thrashed wildly, snapping its enormous jaws. One raptor was instantly crushed under its foot¡ªgone in a single step. Another got caught in its massive jaws, torn in half like wet paper. But Kerl wasn''t stopping. If he backed off, he would be dumb. Because he knew, that t-rex was NOT gonna beat him. Using his raptor agility, he leaped forward, using his claws to cling onto the gigantic dinosaur''s leg. His confidence wasn''t without backing tho, t-rex is most formidable at a distance. With it''s long neck and giant maws, they can bite target with their long reach. But with their short arms, they absolutely suck at getting rid of anything clinging to them. Mainly capable at dealing with prey of equal size or when ambushing, the unique build of t-rex does not allow them to eliminate small annoying threats. Claws sinking into flesh, he climbed toward its neck, aiming for a vital point. The T. rex tried to shake him off and tripped, falling on it''s back. Making it even more vulnerable to his pack''s assault. But Kerl held on with all his might, if the dino fell atop of him... he would be squashed, the sheer difference in weight is overwhelming. if not for how slow the big guy is, the raptor pack would''ve ran between their tails as soon as they met it. He lunged, sinking his raptor jaws into its eye socket. The predator screamed. It stumbled, flailing blindly as the pack took advantage of the distraction. They struck its legs, underbelly, and throat. Wounds multiplied. Blood poured. The T. rex shook during it''s attempt at standing back up¡ª Then collapsed. Dead. Kerl let out a victorious war cry. "QUACK!" Silence. ¡­That was it? He had just killed a freaking T. rex, and it barely felt like a fight. ?So much for being the ultimate predator¡­ i suppose it''s easy because of me. i''m so damn amazing? he thought smugly. He turned to his pack. Two raptors gone¡ªone crushed, the other eaten. he shrugged, ?oh well.. if we dig deep enough in the t-rex belly, we''ll reunite with the other guy.? The survivors didn''t hesitate before tearing into the fallen T. rex, devouring their former predator. Kerl, however, wasn''t about to eat raw dino flesh like some kind of caveman. He grabbed a chunk of meat, made a fire, and started cooking it on a flat rock. Golden-brown, crispy edges, sizzling in the heat. ?they really are the ancestor of chicken huh?? The delicious aroma filled the air. ?Ain''t no way I''m eating prehistoric sushi,? he said to himself, while flipping the meat by stabbing it with his claw. Too bad that delicious aroma was also an open invitation. To every hungry carnivore in the area. A low growl. Rustling leaves. His pack froze, heads snapping toward the sound. They weren''t alone anymore. Kerl realized his mistake. The divine smell of cooked meat. Something these prehistoric creatures had NEVER experienced. a gourmet And now, they wanted a taste. ?¡­Ah, shit.? He sighed, standing up, getting ready. "can''t even have nice shi in jurassic, bruh." Survival and strategy Having a Tyrannosaurus rex in front of you is a great way to remind yourself how fragile life is. And judging by the way his entire velociraptor pack was practically radiating fear, Kerl knew damn well they all had the same thought: Do. Not. Move. His mind raced at a million miles per hour, calculating every possible outcome, yet something strange happened¡ª The T. rex¡­ didn''t care? It barely even glanced at them, lumbering forward on tree-trunk legs, focused entirely on something else. "Hey! I''m tasty enough, get back here and hunt me, bruh!" he inwardly complained¡ªthough, in all honesty, he was really hoping the big guy wouldn''t turn back. As the apex predator disappeared into the jungle, Kerl let out a breath he didn''t know he was holding. He mulled over the situation. ?So I''m not even worth the effort?? That stung his pride a little. But it made sense. Scientists theorized that T. rexes weren''t built for chase-hunting¡ªtoo big, too slow. They were more of an ambush predator. Nice to have that confirmed firsthand. ?Hooray for science¡­ if only I wasn''t running for my life.? As a velociraptor, Kerl was small, fast, and nimble¡ªexactly the kind of prey a T. rex wouldn''t bother with. For a predator that size, something as tiny as a raptor just wasn''t worth the energy. Watching it walk away, he couldn''t help but think. ?Man, if I find the time machine, I''m gonna revolutionize paleontology. Solving dinosaur mysteries just by being here is kinda OP.? His mind wandered. For a moment, he imagined himself returning to the modern world as a revolutionary scientist. "We love you, mr Kerl Erde! You''re the best!" Reporters would gush, cameras flashing in his face. Maybe even¡­ she would come back. His wife. The one who hadn''t kissed him in eight months ever since he started working on the time machine. He could almost hear her voice¡ª "erde..." Silhouette of her calling him. ?leah? he called back. A sharp screech snapped him back to reality. He turned around and it was his Dino underling. This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. ?Right... Dinosaur body. Prehistoric death world. No time for daydreaming.? All of this¡ªthe madness, the struggle¡ªwas thanks to the Deus Ex Machina that was his shitty time machine. If he wanted to return? He had to find it. So he decided that even if the T. rex wasn''t interested in him¡­ He sure as hell was interested in it. This was a prime opportunity, while the dino was looking at somewhere else, he could take the chance to ambush it. He screeched, grabbing the attention of his raptor crew, who all immediately looked at him like he had grown a second head. Then, using his tail, he flung one of his handmade weapons straight at the behemoth. It landed. Right on the T. rex''s skull. The massive predator froze. Then, slowly, it turned its head, nostrils flaring. ?this is a perfect opportunity to solidify my standing as their leader.? Kerl thought. Before it could react further, Kerl struck first. At first, the pack was scared of the apex predator. But the sight of Kerl outmanuevering it made them hesitate, losing their fear partially. Kerl was running around trying to scratch the T-rex from different angles, doing hit n'' run to chip out damage. The thing was too slow to resist, it felt like those chunky boss battle, huge guys but no actual skill. He waited for his pack to join the fun but they were still hesitating, looking from the sideline. ?bruh, this big guy''s just an easy target. why are they so scared?? god, dinosaurs are so dull. No wonder they went extinct." During the fight, kerl had a great time. his theory wasn''t just right, it was always correct. if not, how would he have what it takes to build a time machine? Seeing the big one slowly succumbing to the injuries caused by Kerl''s relentless assault, the pack decided they have to be part of this. They swarmed, biting, slashing, and ripping into the T. rex like prehistoric piranhas. Kerl kept chucking whatever makeshift weapons he had¡ªropes, stones, sharpened sticks. ?HAH! My impeccable aim, honed by YEARS with Call of Duty!? he boasted inwardly. The T. rex roared, shaking the ground as it thrashed wildly, snapping its enormous jaws. One raptor was instantly crushed under its foot¡ªgone in a single step. Another got caught in its massive jaws, torn in half like wet paper. But Kerl wasn''t stopping. If he backed off, he would be dumb. Because he knew, that t-rex was NOT gonna beat him. Using his raptor agility, he leaped towards the T-rex. His claws sinking on the giant''s legs as he cling for dear life. His confidence wasn''t without backing tho, t-rex is most formidable at a distance. With it''s long neck and giant maws, they can bite target with their long reach. But T. rexes were built for crushing prey, not shaking off tiny parasites. Their short arms couldn''t even scratch their own nose, let alone yank off a raptor Claws sinking into flesh, he climbed higher to its neck, aiming for a vital point. The T. rex tried to shake him off and was overwhelmed by the verocity of these little demon, making it fall on it''s back. The result? it became even more vulnerable to the pack''s assault. It was dangerous but Kerl held on with all his might, if the dino fell atop of him... he would be squashed, the sheer difference in weight is overwhelming, the only thing keeping him alive is his incredible agility. He lunged, sinking his raptor jaws into its eye socket. The predator screamed. It stumbled, flailing blindly as the pack took advantage of the distraction. They struck its legs, underbelly, and throat. Wounds multiplied. Blood poured. The T. rex shook during it''s attempt at standing back up¡ª Then collapsed. Dead. Kerl let out a victorious war cry. "QUACK!" Silence. ¡­That was it? that felt like bullying a bodybuilder who had too much muscle and too little mobility. He had just killed a freaking T. rex, and it barely felt like a fight... Prehistoric animals were just beta test, full of design flaws that led to their own demise. It reminded him of a quote ?The snake which cannot cast its skin has to die. And so does those who sticks to one way.? At this point, he was sure no prehistoric creatures knew how to wrestle like a tiger. Grappling wasn''t even a thing yet. Meaning if he just leaned on his childhood WWE memories¡ªwith a few techniques from UFC¡ªhe''d have an evolutionary advantage over half the food chain. ?So much for being the ultimate predator¡­ i suppose everything on earth is disappointing, be it time machine or the legendary might of dinosaurs.? he thought, as a man who seen it all and made discovery beyond many, he knew how utterly unimpressive the world is. He turned to his pack. Two raptors gone¡ªone crushed, the other eaten. He shrugged, ?oh well.. if we dig deep enough in the t-rex belly, we''ll reunite with the other guy.? The survivors didn''t hesitate before tearing into the fallen T. rex, devouring their former predator. Kerl, however, wasn''t about to eat raw dino flesh like some kind of caveman. He grabbed a chunk of meat, made a fire, and started cooking it on a flat rock. Golden-brown, crispy edges, sizzling in the heat. ?they really are the ancestor of chicken huh?? The delicious aroma filled the air. ?Ain''t no way I''m eating prehistoric sushi,? he said to himself, flipping the meat. Too bad that delicious aroma was also an open invitation. To every hungry carnivore in the area. A low growl. Rustling leaves. His pack froze, heads snapping toward the sound. They weren''t alone anymore. Kerl realized his mistake. The divine smell of cooked meat. Something these prehistoric creatures had never experienced. a GOURMET And now, they wanted a taste. ?¡­Ah, shit.? He sighed, standing up, getting ready. "can''t even have nice shi in jurassic, bruh." Brainstorming This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. sluchaynyy vau vau russian. -same as how he can''t randomly make noise while expecting the dinosaurs to take a note. Dinolingo The world of prehistoric earth was lively and vibrant. Trees stand tall like giant, together with the beast that inhabits it''s top. The skies was filled with pterodactyl and pterosaur, as well as the quetzalcoatlus that bullied both. With the deepest abyss of ocean inhabited by the likes of mosasaur as it''s reigning apex. While the land was left with competition between closely strong and beast as oppressive as the tyrannical T-rex. In these lands, at an most unassuming cave, lived perhaps the most dangerous one there is. nestled between jagged rocks with stalagmite as decoration of their home, lived the raptors. Noise of their chattering, chirping, and rattling filled the air. Inside sat a pack of velociraptors. Their sharp eyes glowed in the dim light, their tails flicking lazily. And in the middle of them all was their so-called "leader." Kerl, the very creature with (possibly) no rival in this era. He himself was amongst the greatest talent in human history, arm that intelligence with raptor''s physique and you get yourself the next super-predator. And right now, that supposed genius was hunched forward, intensely focused, trying to learn raptor language. "ckr-" "Bok, bok, btook!" he tested the sounds he could make. His raptors stared at him. They had fought alongside him. Trusted him. Followed his orders. But this? This was the most confusing thing he had ever done. From the outside, Kerl was simply testing sounds. Random syllables, grunts, and clicks, all to gauge their reactions. But from the raptor gang''s perspective? Their leader- this mighty, clever, alpha of theirs¡ªwas saying some straight-up prehistoric bullshit. "Lotato. Bananana. Labarabolo. Tapoz¡ª" Was all they could decipher with their understanding of raptor communication, perhaps he meant something but they with their limited intelligence could only dicern so. If he was using any advanced raptor alphabet, they would have to level up their own learning. Kerl was losing his patience. ?Oh seriously!?? i''ve been spouting for a whole hour and there''s still little to no reaction?? Enjoying the story? Show your support by reading it on the official site. This couldn''t go on, if he apout any more bullshit, they¡ª the raptors would lose all their respect to him as a leader. ?i gotta keep trying!? he steeled his will. "RAH!" this time, the raptors looked just as confused as last time. ?judging by their expression, perhaps it''s a word that require other word to form command with. or i made a mistake. how about his?? He tried again, "RAH, eur." And the raptors all rested on the pile of leaves they treat as their bed. he noted and moved on, ?how about this?? he had an idea to try every combination if any sound didn''t work. Since sentences require more than a word. "Rukh, RAH!" he tested. The raptors who finally got some coherent order from the alpha followed with high-spirit. ?FINALLY!? Kerl celebrated the reaction, that''s something to work from. Since they responded, it means he was getting somewhere. With perseverence, he He clenched his jaw. He was a scientist, damn it! Learning a new language¡ªeven an extinct, dino-bird one¡ªwas just a matter of trial and error. continuing the raptornese training. "IRKH!" He chirped. The sharp chirp made the raptors snap their heads up, observing the area. Kerl blinked. ?Oh? That meant something?? He noted once again. Before testing a different sound, "RAH, uAR." Which made the raptor start bobbing their like how a parrot would when hearing song or ordered by it''s owner. Kerl, now hyped up by the fact that he was making actual progress, continued his experiments with reckless enthusiasm. Kerl grinned. ?Oh yeah, baby. We''re getting somewhere!? He flapped his arms¡ªuh, tiny raptor limbs¡ªjust to see if body movement added extra meaning to the sounds. The raptors stared, unimpressed. "Alright, fair enough," he muttered. "Too early for interpretive dance." Switching tactics, he decided to experiment with non-verbal sounds. He whipped his tail against a rock. THWAP. The raptors flinched and looked alert. "Ooooh, so tail-whipping means something?" He did it again. THWAP-THWAP The raptors chittered amongst themselves, shifting uncomfortably. Kerl got the distinct feeling he had just screamed something in a crowded theater. "Okay, maybe let''s leave that one for now." He went back to vocalizations. "AURH, GURKH!" WHAM! Three hundred pounds of raw raptor muscle slammed into his side, nearly taking him off his feet. Kerl barely caught himself before face-planting. His ribs were *definitely* going to feel that one later. "WHAT THE HELL, MAN?!" He clutched his side, shooting an incredulous look at the raptor who tackled him. "did i just ordered him to commit assault on me or did i just said something incredibly offensive?" The offending raptor merely flicked its tail, looking smug. Kerl exhaled slowly. ?Alright. Noted. Do NOT say ''AURH, GURKH'' unless I want to get trucked.? He thought of something and shouted to two of his raptors "RHOU, GURKH!" and they slammed towards one another. ?ah, i see..? For the sake of scientific rigor, he repeated the phrase with some extra word added¡ª WHAM! ?GODDAMN IT!? He wheezed, sprawled in the dirt. ?Okay, okay! That definitely means ''attack this subject'' or something? He pulled himself up, groaning. ?i sure hope I didn''t just say the velociraptor equivalent of an n word." Now he had to reconsider the plan of testing the language, word by word just for communication. It was too risky¡ª He wouldn''t want to accidentally order them to kill him. Rethinking his strategy, Kerl scratched his chin¡ªer, snout. "This is taking too long. I need a better approach." His human mind flicked through the options. Trial and error was fine, but it wasn''t efficient. If he really wanted to drill commands into these guys, he needed something every animal understood... positive reinforcement. ?Operant conditioning! That''s what it''s called!? He clapped his claws together. ?Raptors might not understand what I''m saying, but they do understand Food!? He glanced at the pack, already scheming. "Body language is the universal language, after all." The plan was simple. Instead of guessing and hoping they got the message, he would reward correct responses with food until they associated certain sounds with specific actions. Classic Pavlovian conditioning, just with dinosaurs. ?Alright, nerds. Who''s ready to play police and do as bribed?? The raptors, of course, had no idea what he was saying. But they did know he was grinning like a madman, which probably wasn''t reassuring. Kerl cracked his claws. ?Let''s get to work.?