《The Legends of the Bracket of GW2》


 Prologue

    It came to pass at a time when eight cities met once again to fight a great war for supremacy among themselves. This time, the god of all worlds, House TGM, had thrown the cities 641, 642, 645, 646, 651, 652, 654 and 656 together and then callously abandoned them to their fate.


    And so the eight cities met on the second GW map to find out who would dominate the others. However, one small thing had gone wrong, which would prove to be the great plot-changing unknown in this legend, but more of that in the following chapters.


    The 656 was significantly weakened and thinned out at the beginning of the GW. The great and well-known leader Ghost, who as an experienced player (in fact, he considered himself the only truly experienced player on the entire map) was the only one who knew what to do, looked for ways out and found them, but being the thoughtful tactician that he was, he initially kept them to himself, leaving everyone else in the dark.


    The 641 at the other end of the bracket stuck together like pitch and brimstone, because they were true friends and like a real family. They were the only ones who knew what cohesion meant and were imbued with positive energy (also known as ¡®synergy¡¯) to spread this to the other cities. They were seen as the heartfelt missionaries of this bracket and were very motivated to fulfil their task.


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    The 654 seemed to be a fun group of relaxed players who just wanted to have a good time and didn''t care much about the squabbling of the other factions.


    The 651, as the secret near-winners of the last GW, had realised that the tactics of sorcery and magic would no longer work this time to fool the others. Consequently, they now posed as scientists who had a major research assignment to complete. The question was whether Caesar was a traitor or a delicious salad. As you can see, this research question was a secret code used to confuse the enemy and deceive foreign intelligence services. It would be difficult for the other cities to reveal this code.


    The 642, 645 and 646 all consisted of very professional progamers who knew that every word they said would be used against them and abused to find out their highly professional tactics for GW. As a result, they didn''t talk to anyone, didn''t open or reply any PNs, and pretended they weren''t even on the map.


    The 652 was well known to most from GW1. A completely useless and mindless gathering of drunken Thunder brothers who shared a single brain cell, threw money and credit cards to make up for their lack of skill, and were all gay to boot.


    GW2 started with this illustrious group. Let the games begin!

 Old acquaintances

    Lil Arrow strolled through the garden of the 641 clan castle on the GW map. Following him wherever he went were his former R4 hairdresser, his former R4 make-up artist and his two fan-wielding girls. Of course, neither his hairdresser nor his make-up artist were still R4 in this town, any more than Lil Arrow was still R5. But fortunately someone had seen sense and left him this small part of his entourage, knowing full well that the transition from king of the city of 655 to a simple citizen in the city of 641 would otherwise have been too hard for him. However, Lil Arrow had had to give up his golden palanquin with the eight palanquin bearers, which would have been too much for Sloth. As the leader, he was a rather laid-back and chilled-out type who would get into trouble if he happened to bump into the powdered Lil Arrow with his golden cape, his carefully curled wig and his entourage.


    And so Lil Arrow spent most of his time in the garden of the clan castle, rattling on about old times, indignant at the lack of seriousness in the game and certain of the constant approval of his followers.


    ¡°It really is a misery,¡± he just explained, ¡±in the city of 655 we were always all of one mind.¡± The R4 hairdresser nodded. The other three nodded too.


    ¡°We were sure we were going to win the game because we approached the whole thing with a lot of seriousness. Everyone realized that.¡±


    The R4 hairdresser nodded. The other three nodded too.


    ¡°And there''s such an awkward, fun atmosphere here now. Really, I''m worried. People are cracking stupid jokes and giggling all day. No, you really can''t win this game like that!¡±


    The R4 hairdresser nodded. The other three nodded too.


    ¡°Powder please!¡± sighed the former king of 655, and the R4 make-up artist dutifully jumped forward, pulled out the powder puff and powdered his boss properly.


    Lil Arrow sneezed and scolded: ¡°Watch out! Not too much! And not on the cape, be careful!¡±


    Annoyed, he allowed the two girls to pat him down and dust him off.


    ¡°It''s horrible here!¡± Lil Arrow complained, ¡±The CVC alone! Everything was on fire, and 652 was cracking stupid jokes. And then some of 641 joined in too! I got zeroed and fainted at least five times. And then they made us do all the RxW ladies'' hair and makeup for prom night. As if it''s that easy to get a good hair and make-up job done when someone is holding a knife to your throat and threatening immediate execution if it doesn''t turn out well! I can''t work like that, no, I really can''t. After that, I fainted for the sixth time.¡± He sneezed again and the entourage nodded.


    Into this situation, there was a sudden noise.


    ¡°Shiva is gone!¡±


    ¡°What, who, where?¡±


    ¡°Where is the guy, he was just there?¡±


    ¡°Please what?¡± Lil Arrow asked, startled, and hurried towards the clan castle, where several members were running around excitedly.


    ¡°Shiva''s gone!¡± one of them informed him, ¡°and he''s completely out of the bracket. 643.¡±


    ¡°Great,¡± Lil Arrow said bitterly, ¡±so that was his big master plan. He packs us all off here, to these miserable jokers who will probably all be burned in the near future, and then he betrays us and takes off. No, really: you can''t trust anyone in this game, no matter how serious they pretend to be at first!¡±


    Offended, he wrapped himself in his golden cloak with a grand gesture and retreated to his room, closely followed by his entourage, which was still nodding.


    ________________________________________


    ¡°I want a divorce!¡± roared Genny, throwing her arms up at her sides. She was standing in the kitchen of the 652''s clan castle and was determined not to be refused this time.


    ¡°Oh yeah?¡± scoffed Lady Evelyne, ¡±And why should I do that? I''m not a divorce judge.¡±


    ¡°Don''t pretend to be! After all, you married me to that guy too!¡±


    ¡°That was a damn bad Elvis impersonator in a damn bad two-minute wedding ceremony in Las Vegas. You''re the one who ran off with Ghost!¡±


    ¡°I''m not! I just wanted to merge our clan so we''d have a chance!¡±


    ¡°Yeah, and then you gave him the R5! You turned from an Amazon queen into a submissive wife who brings her husband''s slippers and lets him degrade her!¡±


    ¡°I didn''t! I''m the one who resigned from the leadership chat! Only then did he demote me, but he wanted me back straight away!¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah, you had a sign around your neck that said ''oAo cheerleader''! When you were still F1F!¡±


    A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    ¡°So what? How could I have known then that you were going to marry me off to him? I never wanted to marry that guy! Now I''m afraid to open the chapters because I don''t know what you''re going to do to me next!¡±


    ¡°I''ll keep you married to him until you learn that a man who tells a woman that she can''t do anything and is worth nothing without him is no good and that any woman is better off leaving as quickly as possible instead of getting involved with him!¡±


    The RxG girls, who were lined up at the edge of the room, actually to help with the food preparations, were constantly turning their heads back and forth in unison, like in a good tennis match. Without question, it was worth volunteering for kitchen duty! There was definitely always something going on here.


    Unexpectedly, the door was opened a crack and an unsuspecting Marzzzz stuck his head in. ¡°I have some more updated member lists here...¡±


    The plate came flying at a suitably high speed and hit the target unerringly. Marzzzz cried out in pain and Genny and Evelyne shouted as if from the same mouth: ¡°Shut the fuck up and get lost! We''ve got something to sort out here!¡±


    Then they turned back to each other.


    Genny groaned. ¡°Look, I''ve apologized to you about a million times. What else am I supposed to do? This is really hell. I never want to see this guy again, I want a divorce, and I need the papers. Is it that hard?¡±


    ¡°Not really. After all, there was still something from my old Genny that led to you leaving him and being here now.¡±


    ¡°Yes, I did! I crossed the city limits in the middle of the night. And I told him what I thought of him! And that he should do his shit on his own from now on! And yeah, if that''s what you want to hear: I will never again get involved with a guy who tells me I can''t do anything without him. That didn''t suit me anyway. I''ve always been a strong woman and I''m going to stay that way.¡±


    ¡°Wonderful, my dear! Here are your divorce papers. Get him to sign down there and it''ll be over very quickly.¡±


    Genny snatched up the papers. ¡°Thank you. And I hate you!¡±


    Lady Evelyne smiled. ¡°You''re welcome. I love you too.¡±


    Genny groaned and buried her face in her hands. ¡°If you do what you did to me to the people you love, then I really don''t want to know what you do to the ones you hate.¡±


    ________________________________________________


    Shiva''s departure had not gone unnoticed in the 652 clan castle either.


    ¡°What do I do now?¡± asked Kodaxx in horror, ¡±that was my arch-enemy! What am I supposed to do now?¡±


    ¡°Smoke a cone!¡± recommended Moksy Rocket.


    ¡°Come on,¡± growled Lipsyte, ¡±you haven''t done much before, Kodaxx. So what are you supposed to do now? - The same as before. Be useless, be useless.¡±


    _________________________________________________


    ¡°Is it actually working again, that you can shout at each other through the windows?¡± yelled the 642''s clan castle. ¡°You did it all the time in the last GW! We want to join in!¡±


    ¡°Sure it works!¡± Marzzzz shouted back from the window of the 652, ¡±but you have to open the window first! Then people will understand you better!¡±


    ¡°Awesome!¡± BadMuthaFka from [cAS] rejoiced and pushed the others aside, ¡±let me have a go!¡±


    He tore open the window and shouted over to the 652 clan castle: ¡°Spending daddy''s money, eh? Yes, you can do that! That''s all you can do! You probably live in the attic or basement of your parents'' house!¡±


    ¡°No, I live here! Otherwise I wouldn''t be here! Logic, my friend, logic!¡±


    ¡°You can only throw credit cards, nothing else!¡± grumbled BadMuthaFka.


    ¡°That''s right! We''re credit card warriors!¡± roared Marzzzz back.


    ¡°You''re ducks!¡± it shouted from the clan castle of 641, where Just Nakash of [SY4] had ripped open the window and was eagerly bellowing along.


    ¡°Wrong, you''re all gay!¡± roared the donkey from the stable, ¡±And you''re just a bad copy of me!¡±


    _____________________________________


    Shadowhunter and Crac01 from 651 had crept up in the shadow of the 652 clan castle. The idea was to find out in time what the enemy was planning, so the two of them planned the ultimate eavesdropping attack.


    ¡°Do you think they know anything about Caesar, boss?¡± Crac01 whispered to his R5 as they both crouched under the slightly raised kitchen window on the mezzanine floor to hear as much as possible of the conversations going on inside.


    Fortunately, all the clan castle guards were very well distracted by the window shouting and paid no attention to the two secret eavesdroppers.


    ¡°They don''t know any more about Caesar than we do,¡± Shadowhunter whispered back, ¡±but shut up now - can you understand what they''re saying in there?¡±


    They both paused and listened.


    ¡°Something about a divorce,¡± Crac01 muttered, ¡±and some - samurai? - complaining about trannies who didn''t accept him.¡±


    ¡°Then he should adapt and change his clothes and make-up,¡± Shadowhunter grumbled, ¡±he probably doesn''t look tranny enough himself. It''s obvious that people won''t accept him then!¡±


    Once again, they were both silent and tried to take in as much as possible.


    ¡°Some - Slowpeg? - says they''re all piglets and dogs. And that someone else in town 649 is pretending to be him. What on earth does he mean?¡±


    ¡°It''s probably all coded,¡± Shadowhunter whispered, ¡±it''ll be secret plans for the MD. Piglets, dogs, trannies, gays and ducks are probably the group names of the attack groups and raid teams. We urgently need to develop a counter-strategy!¡±


    Deeply satisfied with their new findings, the two retreated crawling backwards.


    _____________________________________________


    It had become very empty in the 656 clan castle. A good half of the members had moved to other cities. Lilli was one of the last remaining loyal followers of the great and experienced leader Ghost and now sat sadly alone in the kitchen. She looked around. This had once been a place of life and laughter. Impel, who chopped minced meat... Lady Evelyne, who baked cakes...


    Pensive, Lilli opened the oven and was more than surprised to find a small gift package inside. She took it out in amazement.


    It was nicely wrapped and there was a label on top. ¡°For Ghost¡± was written on it in Lady Evelyne''s handwriting.


    So the lady had left a farewell gift for the leader in the oven?


    Lilli climbed the stairs to Ghost''s study and knocked softly before entering the room. Ghost was sitting at his desk, working on his top-secret master plan that would lead them all to victory in GW.


    ¡°Boss, I''ve found something for you,¡± she said hesitantly and placed the package on the table in front of Ghost.


    Then she carefully retreated towards the door.


    Ghost also seemed surprised. He opened the package, looked at the contents and then burst into a single scream of rage.


    Lilli was only just able to dodge, when the contents of the parcel and the packaging flew against the wall next to her with a crash, and Ghost ran out of the room, foaming at the mouth.


    Lilli gasped for air and first had to recover from her shock. Then she bent down curiously to take a closer look at the lady''s farewell gift.


    It was the book on good leadership.

 Preparations for Massacre Day

    On the eve of Massacre Day, each city prepared in its own unique way.


    ¡°Screw you all!¡± wrote Shiva eagerly on the letterhead in city 643. Excited, he chewed his pen and continued writing. ¡°You''ve all left me! We were sooo well positioned back in 653 City! We could have won GW. But suddenly you were all gone, you traitors! And now you can kiss my ass!¡±


    He tore a second sheet of paper from his folder and continued writing. ¡°You probably thought I''d wait like a victim in 641 until you came and got me, didn''t you? You miscalculated! Play against whoever you want, but not against me! At least not today... we''ll see about the rest of the GW... but I''m going to be the winner for once, and there''s NOTHING, absolutely NOTHING you can do about it!¡±


    There was a crash outside, and suddenly parts of the ceiling paneling of his room in the 643''s clan castle fell down. With a scream, Shiva fled under the desk and looked fearfully underneath.


    Damn! In the battle for the central building, the opponent had actually been better and had just blown him out. Shiva cursed quietly. But at least no one must have noticed. What nobody saw simply didn''t happen. Over and out!


    He carefully picked up his pen from the desk and continued writing under the desk.


    ¡°I''m the winner here!¡±


    He grinned, tied the letter to the foot of his carrier pigeon and sent it on its way to the city of 652.


    ______________________________________


    ¡°Have you seen Shiva?¡± giggled Devi, ¡±look at that!¡±


    He pointed to the map so that everyone could watch Shiva''s defeat live in the central building.


    ¡°Oh man,¡± laughed Kodaxx, ¡±he can''t even stand up to the 649. How is that possible?¡±


    ¡°With Shiva, anything is possible,¡± chuckled Lipsyte.


    ¡°Anything is possible with us too,¡± explained the donkey, who had stuck his head in the window, ¡±because I''m the captain now. From now on, I''m in charge here.¡±


    ¡°Wait, wait!¡± protested Zax, ¡±you''re ONE captain, but not THE captain. That''s still me!¡±


    ¡°Dream on!¡± grunted the donkey, ¡±You''re gay, you''ve already realized that, haven''t you? I''m the only one here who''s straight. So I''m the captain!¡±


    ____________________________________


    In RXD and RxG, the new arrivals fell into each other''s arms.


    ¡°You here!¡± and ¡®You here too!¡¯ could be heard from all sides.


    ¡°Awesome!¡± exclaimed Big JC, ¡±This is like a class reunion. With the difference that I actually like the people here!¡±


    ¡°Who let that Italian pervert in here?¡± shouted SanAndreas25 and eyed Shqiperi suspiciously, ¡±I hope nobody expects me to go into the hot tub with him!¡±


    ¡°There''s no hot tub here,¡± Big JC reassured him, ¡±I''ve already banned hot tubs. This isn''t a spa hotel, remember? Even if certain ladies were stupid enough to believe it, lol.¡±


    ¡°And who let that crazy Irishman in here?¡± protested SanAndreas, glaring at Irish Carbomber.


    ¡°Oh,¡± he replied nonchalantly, ¡±they were impressed with my skills with Lupo as UB. And I''m afraid I forgot to tell Kpap where we went.¡±


    ¡°It doesn''t matter,¡± SanAndreas muttered glumly, ¡±he''s useless anyway. I''ll be glad when I don''t have to put up with any more of you useless fellows around me. I''m off to do something useful and increase my influence. Anyone coming with me?¡±


    ¡°Well, I''m going to look for the hot tub, brother,¡± Shqiperi explained, ¡±I can''t quite believe there isn''t one here yet.¡±


    ¡°Do that,¡± grinned SanAndreas, ¡±the whirlpool will certainly increase the well-being of your enforcers and thus improve your statistics. And if it doesn''t work: Cry!¡±


    ________________________________________


    Admittedly, friendly things also happened in the bracket that day.


    ¡°Whoever from RxW freed my leader: Thank you so much!¡± it bellowed over from the 654 clan castle.


    One of the girls opened the kitchen window. ¡°Do we accept commissions now?¡±


    ¡°No!¡± came from the 654, ¡±it was just a thank you! You freed my UB from the prison of 641! I''m a fan of RxW now!¡±


    This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.


    ¡°Someone likes us for once, that''s amazing!¡± chuckled Black, ¡±I think DmenAce was the one with the good deed. It was more like collateral damage though.¡±


    ¡°But DmenAce is a bad person!¡± roared from the direction of the 651 clan castle, ¡±He captured my leader!¡±


    ¡°Good heavens,¡± sighed the Lady, ¡±that too. More people here, more mouths to feed.¡±


    ¡°The prisoners don''t need anything to eat, you can let them starve,¡± explained DmenAce pitilessly, who had just entered the kitchen and was carrying the bound Shadowhunter with him.


    Lady Evelyne sighed and rolled her eyes. All rednecks here! Nobody respected protocol and etiquette! Etiquette lessons were urgently needed, but of course the Thunder brothers considered that completely superfluous! Men!


    The only thing to do was to set a good example.


    ¡°Welcome, King of the 651,¡± the Lady said politely and curtseyed to Shadowhunter, ¡±it''s a bit of a shame that we''re meeting again under these conditions, of course. May I offer you a cup of coffee and a piece of cake?¡±


    ¡°Too much honor, My Lady,¡± Shadowhunter replied gloomily, ¡°as your comrade here rightly pointed out, I am but a prisoner.¡±


    ¡°Even a captive king remains a king,¡± the lady replied. ¡°And there''s nothing that a piece of cake and a good conversation can''t cure. So: coffee? Cake?¡±


    Smiling, she pushed a plate and cup towards Shadowhunter.


    ______________________________________


    In the 641 clan castle, the day began as usual with a circle of chairs. The leadership took great care to offer enough group-dynamic, emotionally connecting activities, because after all, they are a family!


    In the circle of chairs, only the person holding the talking animal was allowed to speak. This was a small sloth made of plush. Only the person currently holding it had the right to speak. This avoided unpleasant shouting matches or even constant mutual insults, which were common in such terrible factions as RxW.


    One of the farmers had just given an epic account of all the resource stations he had robbed the day before. He had described them all in detail, listed their coordinates and recounted the robbery process down to the minute. Of course, not everyone was interested in this - but Kir Bear and Stabbyunicorn in particular thought it was extremely important that such players also had their say and that the fighters did not constantly push themselves to the fore. The fighters were in the minority anyway, so why were they always claiming equal rights? A democratic vote had quickly and easily resulted in the farmers having the first and last word in future, and that was the right thing to do. After all, Synergy was not a dictatorship, but an association of friends who respected and valued each other!


    The chair circle (which had taken up almost the whole day in this way) was followed by a group therapy session in which everyone told each other their problems, then there was a group dinner with a so-called ¡°warm shower¡±: everyone said five things they particularly liked about each other. No negative things were allowed to be said, only positive things were allowed. It went wonderfully, and the atmosphere was as cozy and friendly as ever. This was followed by a group meditation.


    ¡°I''m really happy that we got rid of certain people,¡± Kir Baer whispered to her friend Stabbyunicorn, ¡±it was so exhausting with them! They didn''t fit in here at all and didn''t want to take part in all this.¡±


    ¡°Oh yes!¡± Stabbyunicorn confirmed, ¡±I know exactly who you mean - Black and Biochest and their followers! Terrible guys. They all fit in much better with those drunken antisocials on 652. RxW is a gang of psychopaths, perverts and bullies. They even admit it themselves, it''s in that Yikesy''s profile! Honestly, the whole time Black and Biochest just wanted us to fight. As if this game is all about fighting! Socializing is just as important, if not more so. Real friendships have developed here that extend into the real world! They don''t know anything like that!¡±


    Kir Bear nodded. ¡°I can''t stand this fighting anyway. It''s crude and cruel! Black and Biochest had no heart, they were cold as ice, and it''s no coincidence that they''ve now ended up in the city of traitors! That''s exactly where they belong. I hated that they kept pinging me when there were fights and wanted me to join in. They were constantly showing me my own inability, no stop, wrong text, I mean they were constantly trying to make themselves important to me. They didn''t even recognize the true value of a real family!¡±


    ¡°Very true,¡± Sloth confirmed, ¡±they fit in better with RxW. They''re a terrible bunch. They burn everything down ruthlessly and enslave the entire GW map. And if they get a headwind and don''t know what to do next, they pull out their credit cards as the ultimate superweapon!¡±


    In unison, the assembled Synergetics shook their heads in horror and silence and then sank back into their group meditation.


    ____________________________________________


    ¡°Zax, can your beer barrels go somewhere else?¡± shouted Thunder Boo from the cellar.


    ¡°Leave my beer barrels alone, there''ll be a war, brother!¡± Zax shouted back.


    ¡° Dude, we need space! Tomorrow is MD, we''ll take masses of prisoners, the dungeon''s not enough! We''ve thought about adding the wine cellar and your beer vault...¡±


    ¡°Then stack the prisoners as far as I''m concerned! But my beer barrels stay where they are!¡±


    ¡°Wow, that colleague is exhausting,¡± grumbled Thunder Boo, ¡±I don''t want to say anything. Somehow I''ve become a kind of janitor here. Why does everyone expect me to make space, rebuild the existing rooms and solve the problem of overcrowding?¡±


    Thoughtfully, he entered the castle courtyard and then the stables.


    ¡°Donkey, can I put a few prisoners in the stable for you? We need the space...¡±


    ¡°You must be gay!¡± protested the donkey, ¡±Candycane''s damn horse is already standing here farting all day. If a few more stinking prisoners from other cities come along now, I''ll have no quality of life here at all!¡±


    ¡°I''m beginning to not care! Cry!¡±


    ¡°Hey, that''s my text!¡± roared Kodaxx from the castle wall where he was standing guard, ¡±stop stealing my text right now!¡±


    ¡°I''ve heard that before!¡± roared the donkey, ¡±It''s exactly the same with me! You''re always saying my words! That''s because you''re all far too stupid to come up with your own!¡±


    ¡°Who''s stupid here, hey?¡± roared Kodaxx and jumped off the wall. It was bad luck that he overlooked Thunder Boo, who had just turned around. Thunder Boo took a heavy blow and fell into the dung heap.


    ¡°You damn...¡± roared Boo, jumping out of the dung heap and giving Kodaxx a huge punch to the jaw.


    ¡°Mass brawl!¡± roared the Thunder brothers enthusiastically, and everyone ran out into the castle courtyard to make sure they didn''t miss anything and to participate as actively as possible.


    And so the day in the 652''s clan castle ended with the best things they could do there: fighting, shouting at each other, insulting each other and otherwise not having a plan.


    A great preparation for the MD!

 The Church of Synergy

    ¡®They have WHAT?¡¯ Black almost choked on her coffee.


    ¡®Well, it''s right here!¡¯ Lady Evelyne slipped her a colourful advertising brochure that she had just found in the letterbox. The cover picture showed several very happy-looking people hugging each other and gazing into the distance together. The sun could be seen behind them, framing the whole group like a halo.


    ¡®They''ve formed a SECT?¡¯ Black was still stunned.


    ¡®Well, they call it a church. It says so right here,¡¯ Lady Evelyne repeated patiently. ¡®It says: ¡®Come to us and experience light, love and peace! The Church of Synergy offers all lost souls a home and the experience of a true family. With us, you will feel at home and find your true purpose in a circle of like-minded people. We grow our own vegetables, farm all day and have a lot of real fun doing it. Our mild and kind leader Sloth will welcome you with open arms, our two high priestesses Stabbyunicorn and Kir Bear will introduce you to the blessings of our community. Come and join us, become a member of the Church of Synergy!"¡¯


    Lady Evelyne turned the brochure over. ¡®Oh, there''s some small print here. ¡®Participation in all group-dynamic and therefore totally emotionally valuable events is compulsory. Personal property is transferred to the community. If you don''t come to us, we''ll come to you. We will bring light, love and peace to the entire GW map by force if necessary.¡¯ - Well, my dear, the small print is a declaration of war. But the rest sounds really nice. Don''t you think? They seem like very nice people, I don''t know what you have against them.¡¯


    Black was still coughing.


    Then she gasped: ¡®So it says they''re coming to us, does it? Tomorrow is MD. Are they going to ring our doorbell and tell us about light, love and peace? And then give us funny, colourful missionary magazines?¡¯


    ¡®Looks like it, yes,¡¯ giggled Lady Evelyne. ¡®But it also says: they only come to us if we don''t come to them!¡¯


    Black stood up and pulled out a knife. ¡®Well, that''s all right then. I''ve got to get going. See you later, my dear!¡¯


    ________________________________________________


    All hell broke loose on the battlefield. With several cities involved, it was damn hard to keep track of everything. From RxW and RXD, some were poaching on the 656 front, others in the 641, and the 642 also got in on the action. Thunder had framed his underworld castle with cherry blossoms and decorated it nicely so that it still looked cute and not too scary. He thought it looked very harmonious together and made a very likeable impression overall.


    The Church of Synergy had set off in an orderly formation, laden with crates of missionary magazines as an extra boost. Sloth was still full of anger about the lost CVC, and this holy rage overshadowed everything and motivated his followers immensely. It was clear: today they would not be the victims of victim bashing! At least not all the time. Or not at all times. Or at least - well, sometimes not. Because light, love and peace were with them!


    The first door the screened members of the Church of Synergy knocked on was at the clan castle of the 642. Majk Mafos of [cAS] opens the door. ¡®Yes please?¡¯


    The next moment, a fist hit him in the face and a voice thundered: ¡®Light! Love! And peace, brother! If you do not become a believer, we will destroy you!¡¯


    Afterwards, two Synergetics dumped a whole box of mission magazines on the dazed Majk Mafos, who could only stammer: ¡®Oh my God! So much love here!¡¯


    Satisfied with the great mission success, the Synergetics now had more confidence in themselves and set off for the 652.


    __________________________________________


    ¡®They''re attacking on the tiles!¡¯ wailed Leader Shaima of [TTH] in 642.


    ¡®Who?¡¯ asked the others in the SC in astonishment, ¡¯the 652? The 641?¡¯


    ¡®No!¡¯ wailed Shaima, ¡®¡¯our own inhabitants! [AOL]!¡¯


    ¡®That''s gay!¡¯ roared the donkey.


    ¡®I''m really sorry,¡¯ MightyGuySensei tried to console Shaima, ¡¯I''m not behind it...¡¯


    ¡®Yes, because you''re gay!¡¯ roared the donkey.


    ¡®There really should be rules.¡¯


    ¡®Rules are even gayer!¡¯


    ¡®You''re ducks!¡¯ quacked Just Nakash in between.


    The donkey angrily kicked out with its hind hooves, narrowly missing Just Nakash. ¡®Shut the fuck up, you Temu donkey! You cheap copy!¡¯


    ¡®We''re leaving town after GW,¡¯ Shaima announced bitterly.


    cCc Negan from [AOL] rolled his eyes. ¡®Finally. Thank you. Do that, please.¡¯


    _________________________________________


    ¡®You should be ashamed of yourselves!¡¯ Lil Arrow shouted from a safe distance from the 641 clan castle, ¡¯You keep attacking on grey! Always using UB trappers! Always ruining the game for others!¡¯


    ¡®Who let him out?¡¯ asked Boboo in amazement, ¡¯didn''t they forbid him to join in?¡¯


    ¡®No, that was Shiva... Shiva just got punched in the face on 643 too, have you seen? He was zeroed by JiveTurkey from [DS8],¡¯ Devi replied.


    Boboo chuckled, ¡®Is there a single situation where Shiva didn''t get zeroed?¡¯


    ¡®And you''re always making fun of other players! Here we go again!'' Lil Arrow shouted some more, ¡¯that''s because you''re miserable clowns! You''re not intellectually capable of taking the game seriously at all!¡¯


    Marzzzz raised his eyebrows. ¡®I draw attention to the fact that one person absolutely must be zeroed.¡¯


    Boboo winked at Marzzzz: ¡®I''ll take care of that.¡¯


    And while Boboo zeroed Lil Arrow, the Church of Synergy had finally reached its destination: the arsenal captured by Ghost from RXD.


    ____________________________________________


    Ghost had been distracted for a moment.


    Lil Arrow''s shouting had thrown him off his stride.


    ¡®What''s that guy shouting about?¡¯ he asked the R4 standing next to him.


    Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.


    He listened and pondered for himself. ¡®I don''t know...¡¯ He yelled over to the 641''s clan castle, ¡¯Lil Arrow, what did you just say?¡¯


    ¡®I said that you all and RxW always attack others to get buildings! And then you always get the buildings while the other faction collects the buildings, and then...¡¯


    There was a crash as if from a violent explosion, and that was the last thing to be heard from Lil Arrow that day.


    ¡®I''ve lost brain cells listening to that freak''s prattle!¡¯ moaned Ghost, ¡¯It happens to me every damn time! I shouldn''t listen to him anymore... oh. Damn... what''s that?¡¯


    A heavy pounding of several fists could be heard at the door.


    ¡®Open up! This is the Church of Synergy! We bring the message of light, love and peace! To you too!¡¯


    Ghost and his R4 looked at each other. ¡®Shit!¡¯


    ____________________________________


    ¡®I haven''t finished my popcorn yet!¡¯ shouted Kitana Rage from 656, ¡¯what''s going on down there?¡¯


    There was a lot going on. Black and her raid team were getting stressed.


    ¡®Speed, we''ve got to save Ghost''s arse! They''re attacking on grey!¡¯


    Benexi''s eyes widened. ¡®Amazing! 641 is attacking? That''s something we haven''t seen in all of GW1!¡¯


    ¡®A blind hen sometimes finds a grain!¡¯ grinned Hen Solo.


    ¡®This chicken thing is driving me nuts,¡¯ growled Sloth, ¡¯that''s the only reason I''m even here!¡¯


    Benexi''s eyes widened even further. ¡®Oh, I thought it was because of the message of light, love and peace?¡¯


    ¡®That''s why!¡¯ Sloth pulled out a mission magazine. ¡®Would you like one before we dump the rest over Ghost''s head so he understands our message?¡¯


    _______________________________________


    The raid team worked quickly and effectively. Yume from the Synergetics, who sat in the armoury as Raid Lead, didn''t stand a chance. The encounters came in such quick succession and were so hard that she knew she would lose.


    For a brief moment, she almost succumbed to the temptation to escape the situation. But that wasn''t why she had come here. Not to flee. Not to leave the battlefield dishonourably. She had already been hit hard by the first raids of Black and now saw the last raid of Biochest approaching. It was the end. But only the end of the battle. Not the end of honour. The little Japanese girl stood up proudly. She crossed her arms in front of her chest and drew both knives. With her eyes closed, she took a deep breath. Then she faced the attack.


    ________________________________________


    Thunder Devi had taken over the Arsenal with an elegant sweep of his hand and was just settling in when a small Japanese girl appeared next to him. He couldn''t even say ¡®oops¡¯ before she had already trapped him, and the next moment the Triple Raid was running towards his house.


    Thunder Devi cursed. As a true Thunder brother, he was too drunk to really notice everything around him, but it was clear that he was now in a quandary. His UB was stuck in the Arsenal, his house was a sitting duck. What now?


    Even when drunk, there was no question what to prioritise. The faction. Always the faction. It was above any self-interest. Each of them was prepared to die for the faction if necessary.


    Sighing, Thunder Devi pulled out his precious T4 to save it at least, and then sacrificed himself for the community.


    The Triple Raid rolled in with the force of a tsunami.


    ¡®Light!¡¯ roared Insane Wayne.


    ¡®Love!¡¯ shouted Jan.


    ¡®Peace!¡¯ thundered Sloth like the Last Judgement itself. And all three struck at the same time. Thunder Devi fell over like a cone.


    ________________________________________


    ¡®Quick, we''ve got to dig him out!¡¯ shouted Scappy, trying to shovel aside the piles of missionary magazines under which Thunder Devi had been buried.


    Taste, who had run with her to the Arsenal, hurriedly helped her.


    At last, the lifeless body of Thunder Devi emerged. Tears welled up in Taste''s eyes. ¡®Is he still breathing? Is he dead?¡¯


    ¡®I''m not dead,¡¯ muttered Thunder Devi, ¡¯but you could still give me mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.¡¯


    ¡®Oh, you bastard!¡¯ cried Taste, ¡¯We were worried about you, and you''re only thinking of one thing again!¡¯


    Thunder Devi picked himself up with a grin. ¡®It wasn''t that bad. A bit of T2 and T3 broken, all good. But can I still get mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?¡¯


    _______________________________________


    ¡®I want a sexy triple attack like that too!¡¯ moaned Black, ¡®why can''t I get it? I mean, Sloth is such a ladyboy, no nonsense, loverboy, no crap, ladykiller... he could really defend his women like a gentleman and come at me, couldn''t he?¡¯


    ¡®Guys, what''s going on in Arsenal II?¡¯ shouted Lipsyte, ¡¯look at this!¡¯


    Everyone rushed to the window with binoculars and onto the heights.


    ¡®Oh shit... the Church of Synergy is trying to proselytise Mr Trump!¡¯


    ¡®This is going wrong... oh, this is going wrong...¡¯ the Thunder brothers giggled with anticipation, boxing each other aside to get the best vantage point.


    In fact, the Church of Synergy troop had now arrived at the 642''s Arsenal and were trying to sell the mission magazines to the AOL members there. When nobody answered their knock, they simply set fire to a few AOL houses.


    Mr Trump made short work of it. He swapped places in the arsenal with Miss Laura and then, without hesitation, burnt all the missionary magazines and the missionaries with them.


    ¡®Oooooh,¡¯ Marzzzz sighed with pleasure, ¡¯I love it. Trump just says to himself, fuck the arsenal, burn them all!¡¯


    ¡®Burn them all!¡¯ roared the Thunder brothers, ¡¯can''t we recruit him? He''d be a good fit for us!¡¯


    ¡®We''re still the best,¡¯ cursed the Synergetics, who hurriedly fled, ¡¯the behaviour of the other cities only shows that they''re afraid of us!¡¯


    ___________________________________________


    ¡®I''d really like a triple raid on me too!¡¯ shouted Marzzzz outside on the battlefield in the direction of the Synergetics. ¡®I''ll take some of your mission journals off your hands and read them too! Honestly!¡¯


    ¡®Whoops!¡¯ shouted Black, ¡¯why does that work for you and not for me? Why are you being attacked and I''m not? That''s so unfair!¡¯


    ¡®Ewww,¡¯ grumbled Marzzzz, ¡¯I wasn''t actually prepared for this - heck, screw it! Come here, you bastards!¡¯


    With a cry of rage, he drew his sword and sprinted towards the attackers.


    They formed up quickly to form a triple raid. And then it rolled again, the tsunami.


    ¡®Light!¡¯ roared Insane Wayne.


    ¡®Love!¡¯ shouted Jan.


    ¡®Peace!¡¯ thundered Sloth. Immediately afterwards there were three crashes. And then there was icy silence on the battlefield.


    Scappy and Taste ran as fast as they could to the spot where they had last seen Marzzzz. This time it was even worse than with Thunder Devi, because the Synergetics hadn''t just dumped their mission journals all over Marzzzz.


    ¡®They''ve stuck them to him with superglue!¡¯ shouted Scappy in horror, ¡¯He looks like a chicken full of feathers! Those bastards have stuck their advertising leaflets all over him!¡¯


    Taste had thrown herself over the unconscious Marzzzz and covered him with a thousand kisses.


    ¡®Oh please, come back to yourself! Please please, don''t be dead!¡¯


    Marzzzz, who was trying to look as lifeless as possible, couldn''t help but grin. It was worth taking a triple raid for that alone! These reactions from the women in the faction were simply priceless!


    He struggled to get to his feet and had Taste and Scappy help him.


    He looked down at himself in confusion. Pictures of happy people holding each other in their arms and framed by the sunlight like a halo were stuck to him. ¡®Come to the Church of Synergy,¡¯ he read, ¡¯and what does it say? The mild and kind leader Sloth will embrace you...¡¯


    Angrily, he turned towards the 641: ¡®Well, by ¡°mild¡± and ¡°kind¡± I mean something else!¡¯


    ¡®So what? Live with it or die with it! After all, I can feel your breath on my neck all the time, now give me a treat!¡¯ Sloth shouted back.


    ¡®You can only throw mission magazines!¡¯


    ¡®And you can only throw credit cards!¡¯


    ¡®It''s not our fault if you don''t have credit cards!¡¯


    ¡®Cry!¡¯


    ¡®Hey!¡¯ roared Kodaxx, ¡®That''s my words! Stop stealing my words right now! I''ve already said that several times!¡¯


    ¡®And who cares?¡¯ shouted Sloth angrily, ¡¯nobody!¡¯


    ¡®You''re not the original!¡¯ raged Kodaxx, ¡¯You''re a cheap copy! You Temu-Kodaxx!¡¯


    ______________________________________


    ¡®Is everyone finished now?¡¯ asked Lipsyte, exasperated.


    ¡®I hope so,¡¯ replied Devi. With a quick movement, he removed trayamukri3 from [SY0], who was hanging on his leg like an angry little barker and had been swearing at him furiously since returning from the battlefield.


    ¡®You bastard! You arsehole! You motherfucker!¡¯ howled trayamukri.


    He jumped straight back at Devi''s leg and raged on and on.


    A quick shove put him at a distance again, and although no one responded to him, trayamukri continued to scream.


    DmenAce pushed himself away from the wall he had been leaning against with an elegant movement. ¡®I draw your attention to the fact that one person absolutely must be zeroed.¡¯


    Devi laughed and blew trayamukri up with a single snap of his fingers. ¡®And now what?¡¯


    ¡®Now comes the rest,¡¯ DmenAce declared nonchalantly.


    ¡®Yeah,¡¯ agreed Lipsyte calmly. ¡®Now we''ll clean up.¡¯


    And that''s exactly what they did.


    ______________________________________


    That evening, two bonfires of honour burned in the courtyards of the respective clan castles of 641 and 652.Two bonfires for two members who had sacrificed themselves for the others on this MD.


    ¡®For Yume,¡¯ Sloth said solemnly, scattering two handfuls of Synergy-blessed herbs into the bonfire.


    ¡®For Thunder Devi!¡¯ roared the Thunder brothers and poured a lot of beer and liquor into the flames.


    The sparks from the two fires rose into the air, and as they reached high enough in the night sky, they joined together to form a single glowing circle of fire.

 Sex, love and chili con carne

    ¡°People will eventually appreciate the benefits of a well-equipped kitchen,¡± proclaimed Impel, who had finally finished chopping meat.


    ¡°Especially the importance of a well-functioning kitchen for war,¡± agreed Lady Evelyne. ¡°The kitchen is often underestimated. Yet what we do here is hugely important.¡±


    She looked around with satisfaction. They had remodeled: Two additional kitchenettes had been installed at the back for the Jewish players so that their meals could be prepared kosher. Thanks to Ramadan, the Muslim players now ate at night, which relieved the situation in the dining room enormously - now they could eat in two shifts until the former bedroom and bathroom of Thunder Horny and Thunder Cock had been cleared out and attached to the dining room by breaking through the wall. Since Kodaxx and Dylan had taken over the shopping with their trucks, the enormous quantities of food needed could be managed. Yes, you could say: it was finally working!


    Meanwhile, at the front of the kitchen, Marzzzz was sitting on a chair and being tended to by several women. Scappy tried isopropyl alcohol, Genny lemon juice and Taste nail polish remover, but the superglue that had stuck the mission magazines to Marzzzz was stubborn.


    Marzzzz whined in all registers during this procedure, not so much because he was a wimp, but rather because he liked the girls'' reactions so much. As soon as he whined, they began to comfort and stroke him tenderly. One of the notes stuck to Marzzzz''s forehead was extremely stubborn. The girls scrubbed in vain, but there was still some residue on it, which read in bold block letters: ¡°Light! Love! Peace!¡±.


    Lady Evelyne observed the situation, shaking her head, before saying in an emphatically friendly manner: ¡°I''ll need you later, by the way, my dear. You have to go back into town.¡±


    Marzzzz looked at Lady Evelyne suspiciously. ¡°Why?¡±


    ¡°We''re missing plates,¡± said the lady as innocently as possible.


    Marzzzz gasped for air. ¡°Oh yeah, we''re missing plates? Why do you think?¡±


    ¡°Well, because you recruited too many people. It''s clearly your fault!¡±


    ¡°Oh, now it''s all my fault again, as usual! Recruitment is closed! Couldn''t it be that we''re missing plates because you keep throwing them at me?¡± Marzzzz grumbled indignantly.


    Lady Evelyne raised her eyebrows. ¡°Do you want another plate thrown at your head?¡±


    Marzzzz fled from the kitchen, screaming.


    __________________________________________


    Thunder was sitting in his boss''s office, not suspecting anything bad, when Marzzzz stormed in in a rage.


    ¡°I want to complain!¡±


    Thunder looked up in astonishment. ¡°The complaints office is closed... we did away with that back in Mink''s day. What''s happened? And why does your forehead say ''Light! Love! Peace!''?¡±


    Marzzzz groped furiously at his forehead. ¡°It won''t come off! We tried, but it''s stuck! But, brother, don''t distract me. I want to complain. It''s serious.¡±


    Thunder sighed. Important matters had to be dealt with personally, even as dictator, there was no way around it. ¡°Sit down and tell me what''s going on.¡±


    ¡°This new girl - this Lady Evelyne - she''s killing me! I''m being chased around all the time! She chases me from one task to the next! She wants me to go into town all the time to get things and do things for her! And if she''s not happy with me or something doesn''t suit her, she throws plates at my head!¡±


    Thunder couldn''t suppress a grin. ¡°Well, that sounds like a happy marriage.¡±


    ¡°Are you kidding me, bro? I''m not marrying her in my life, I''ll kill myself first!¡±


    ¡°Light, love, peace, brother,¡± Thunder replied reassuringly, ¡±you shouldn''t get so upset about it. Just relax.¡±


    ¡°Relax? You must be out of your mind! Don''t you give a damn how she treats me?¡±


    Thunder smirked. ¡°Well, brother, YOU recruited her!¡±


    Marzzzz gasped, ¡°On your orders! You told me to recruit her!¡±


    ¡°Really, did I? I don''t even remember that. You know, the door was closed and it was so loud in here...¡±


    ¡°Oh yes you did!¡± raged Marzzzz, "You said ¡¯you take care of Lady Evelyne, I''ll recruit Black in the meantime''... ooooohhhh... wait a minute! I''ve got it now! That was on purpose!¡±


    Thunder tried to look as innocent as possible. ¡°Really, on purpose?¡±


    ¡°Oh yes!¡± roared Marzzzz, ¡±You''re such a bastard! You''ve set it up perfectly again! You sent me to Lady Evelyne and you took care of Black yourself! Now you''ve got pretty, sweet Black, and I''ve got that vicious noob dragon, lurking in the kitchen and throwing plates!"


    He turned on his heel and left the boss''s office, slamming the door.


    Thunder smiled. There was nothing like good staff planning.


    ___________________________________________


    Meanwhile, Sloth from the 641 was busy forging a powerful alliance of seven cities. Seven cities on the GW map! Against one, THE one, that damned, cursed, accursed 652! That had to work. The Church of Synergy had already had its first successes in its missionary work, and other great leaders had joined them. But others hesitated, and even those who had been recruited caused difficulties and tried to assert their own interests.


    Sloth had changed his tactics. No one should think that he was just the stupid and slow sloth here! He was quite the strategist, and he knew it was time to change his image too. The mild and benevolent leader was history - now something scary and terrifying was needed! People should be scared of him!


    Determined to appear scary and frightening from now on, he changed his name, his appearance and his motto.


    A styling as a horror clown, with a white-painted face and red wig. A slogan: ¡°I''m every nightmare you''ve ever had!¡± - and a renaming to DOINK as the crowning glory. DOINK sounded much scarier than Sloth, he was sure of it.


    Satisfied, he looked at himself in the mirror when there was a knock on the door.


    ¡°Come in!¡± called Sloth, and Lil Arrow entered the room. As soon as he saw the leader, he clapped his hands together in delight: ¡°Oh Sloth, you look just like me!¡±


    ¡°Huh?¡± asked Sloth, irritated.


    ¡°Yes! White-painted face, wig... that''s my style! Wonderful, you''ve finally acquired a taste for fashion. And I was your trendsetter and your inspiration! Wait, you''re still missing some powder on your face, otherwise you''ll have white make-up everywhere later...¡±


    This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    And before Sloth could defend himself, Lil Arrow already had the powder puff in his hand and thrust it full into the leader''s face. Sloth got a whole load of powder in his nose, mouth and eyes, had to sneeze and cough immediately and couldn''t see a thing. The red horror clown wig fell off his head as he desperately flailed his arms.


    ¡°Go away! Damn it, Lil Arrow, get the fuck out of here!¡±


    ¡°I only meant well!¡± Lil Arrow protested in a huff, but retreated as ordered. Sloth cursed. He wiped the powder from his eyes, picked up the red wig and put it back on.


    Terrible, these members! Unfortunately, he had to rely on recruiting, er, proselytizing, everything that wasn''t three on the trees. It was a disgrace! All because of that damn 652!


    He went into the next room, where his two closest confidants Stabbyunicorn and Kir Bear were waiting.


    ¡°Well, what do you say?¡± he asked proudly, turning back and forth in front of them. ¡°New outfit, new name, new profile slogan! Do I look scary and frightening enough now?¡±


    Stabbyunicorn and Kir Bear gave each other a quick glance.


    ¡°Certainly, boss,¡± Stabbyunicorn then said in a soft voice, trying to sound particularly affectionate, ¡±Kir and I are probably just not the best people to ask that question. We know you and we know what you''re really like.¡±


    ¡°I will teach the 652 to fear!¡± Sloth declared with fervor, ¡±and the other cities too! Because logically, I must be the leader of the alliance of the seven cities. I have the most experience. And I run a church after all, so I''m also spiritually fulfilled enough for this important task.¡±


    ¡°Oh yes,¡± said Kir Bear in a singing voice, ¡±spiritual fulfillment is so important! We''re about to have a group cuddle in the main hall followed by a circle of chairs. Are you coming too?¡±


    ¡°Of course,¡± said Sloth, ¡±I won''t miss it.¡±


    Stabbyunicorn reached for her handbag and pulled out a powder puff. ¡°Just maybe let me powder you up a bit, otherwise you''ll smear all that white face makeup on everyone at the group cuddle...¡±


    ________________________________________


    All you could hear in the dining room was ravenous grunting. A whole horde of Thunder brothers had pounced on the lunch, which today consisted of chili con carne, like a gang of starving people and were now stuffing their faces with incredible speed, with table manners playing a subordinate role. At this point, Slow Pain could have rightly claimed that RxW was all pigs and dogs.


    ¡°Wow, that tastes great!¡± Yuber smacked his lips full and didn''t care that half of it fell off, ¡±so no matter what they''re like in the kitchen and that the plates are flying... they can cook and bake! I''ve never eaten as well as I have in the last few days!¡±


    ¡°Supposedly this is a former harem!¡± whispered Hen Solo mysteriously, ¡±They can do anything! Even beyond cooking. It is said that each of them knows about 150 different ways to make a man really happy. And Genny, because she was the favorite of that old sultan, the lion, supposedly knows a few hundred more!¡±


    ¡°Guys, I don''t know about you,¡± smacked Offline, ¡±but I''m going to the kitchen later and pick one of them and propose to her. A woman who''s hot in bed and can also cook really well... that''s the absolute dream woman! It doesn''t get any better than that!¡±


    ¡°Yes, they''re all really pretty too, except for that noob dragon. But the others are all real hot babes in terms of looks and a clear 10!¡±


    ¡°Do we have enough of them for everyone?¡± asked Offline suspiciously, ¡±I had the idea first, I want to pick one first! Or does Thunder have first dibs as boss?¡±


    The Thunder brothers thought hard. The boss had always held back on this question, but you never know...


    ¡°Chili con carne? Seriously?¡± shouted Lipsyte, who had been a little late due to a raid and was only now entering the dining room.


    ¡°Yeah, tastes absolutely awesome, bro, come over here, there''s some more!¡± yelled a few Thunder brothers, willingly moving closer together.


    ¡°You do know that there are dozens of us sleeping in one room, right?¡± roared Lipsyte, ¡±17 of you are sleeping in my room alone! And then there''s chili con carne? Are you going to kill me with your intestinal gas tonight? That''s applied sadism coming out of the kitchen again!¡±


    _______________________________________


    Marzzzz stumbled through the entrance hall. He absolutely had to attack something. He urgently needed to attack something now! Luckily, Candycane and DmenAce came towards him.


    ¡°Come on guys! Let''s go raiding! I really need to zero someone!¡± growled Marzzzz.


    Candycane stared at Marzzzz curiously. ¡°You do realize that you have ¡°Light! Love! Peace!¡± on your forehead, right?¡±


    ¡°Oh shut the fuck up, everyone...¡±


    _______________________________________


    One of the favorite pastimes of all the factions from the last GW, yelling at each other through the windows of the clan castles, was also cultivated with dedication and enthusiasm by all participants in this GW.


    ¡°641, why are you attacking us on the tiles?¡± Liliana from 656 shouted indignantly.


    ¡°Because you''re not using QR!¡± came RenaissancE''s prompt reply.


    ¡°Since when do we have to use QR on the GW map if they''re not Lvl 7 diamonds?¡±


    ¡°We decided that as a rule! We may have forgotten to communicate it to you and your leadership!¡±


    ¡°You''re out of your minds!¡± Liliana shouted angrily, ¡±You can''t attack first and then quickly invent a supposed rule afterwards!¡±


    ¡°Yes, we can! That''s what we always do! We''re the Church of Synergy, it''s part of our sacred mission!¡±


    ¡°I don''t even know you!¡± Liliana scolded.


    ¡°That''s not an argument! You don''t know anyone!¡± Genny from 652 shouted back, ¡±You didn''t know who Marzzzz and Thunder were either!¡±


    ¡°I only know important people!¡± scolded Liliana, ¡±I know Ghost! And the rest is unimportant! And I definitely don''t need to know this RenaissancE, because he''s...¡±


    ¡°...gay!¡± roared the donkey in between. ¡°He''s the gayest one here, nobody needs to know him!¡±


    ______________________________________


    ¡°You don''t need to imagine anything about your supposed skills!¡± Lil Arrow shouted out of the window of the 641 in the direction of the 652, ¡±The fact is that Thunder pays you to play. And you have to send him foot pics in return. I have proof! Just take a look at Thunder''s island! It''s right there!¡±


    ¡°Oh shit, he leaked us,¡± Black groaned with a chuckle and tore open the window. In the direction of Lil Arrow, she yelled, ¡°Since you already know! The sums aren''t right! We recruit normal members with small packages, raid leaders get a big 100 euro package a week!¡±


    Turning back to the others, she said, ¡°Let''s see if he really believes this shit.¡±


    Genny rolled his eyes. ¡°Lil Arrow believes everything! Really everything! It was like that in the last GW!¡±


    ¡°Ha, I knew it!¡± Lil Arrow shouted triumphantly, ¡±it''s all about the money with you guys!¡±


    ¡°Oh,¡± said Biochest nonchalantly, ¡±I''m for sale, a mercenary so to speak. If anyone makes me a better offer than Thunder, I''m out of here.¡±


    ¡°There you hear it!¡± Lil Arrow bawled, his voice rising with indignation, ¡±No cohesion! No family! No seriousness towards the game! All venal, degenerate idiots on the 652!¡±


    ¡°Degenerate alcoholics and bullies with credit cards please,¡± Black improved, ¡±that''s right!¡±


    ¡°Now I feel insulted!¡± muttered Lipsyte, ¡±although - wait - yes, yes - true!¡±


    ____________________________________


    ¡°I''m looking for a chicken named Shelby!¡± yelled Deniz from 641 out the window, ¡±I want to put it in the oven! Where it belongs!¡±


    Tommy Shelby on the 652 grinned. ¡°Too late, brother! I''m already gone again! You were too slow!¡±


    Sloth pushed his subordinates aside and stepped up to the window himself. ¡°I''ll show you how this game really works. I''ll teach you all to fear! From now on, it''s no more fun!¡± - Lil Arrow applauded enthusiastically - ¡°From now on, the strings will be changed! The Church of Energy has a mission, and it will pursue it with an iron fist!¡±


    ______________________________________


    ¡°Aoth, you''ll end up as a doormat!¡± shouted MightyGuySensei from 642.


    ¡°Don''t yell so loud, bro, I''m standing right next to you! I''m from the same city!¡± yelled Aoth back.


    ¡°I don''t care where you are! You''ll end up as a doormat everywhere!¡±


    ¡°Exactly!¡± interjected Shadowhunter from 651, ¡±because he''s a Caesar! A damn traitor, a salad and now a doormat too!¡±


    ____________________________________


    Aglid had not been able to refrain from sneaking across the city limits and into the kitchen of the 652''s clan castle in the dark. He missed talking to Lady Evelyne too much. Besides, as always, he had important news to tell her. And after all, there was nothing wrong with a good piece of cake!


    ¡°Do you know what''s so special about RxW?¡± he murmured, well sated after the first slice, ¡±they teach people humility. It works outwardly and inwardly. It''s really amazing!¡±


    ¡°Really?¡± smiled Lady Evelyne, pushing a second piece of cake towards Aglid.


    ¡°Yes, it''s really fascinating. It works on everyone. Even Ghost has learned humility - at least at first,¡± Aglid quickly added. ¡°But I would never have thought it possible for anyone to do that.¡±


    ¡°Oh, I think there''s still a lot possible on this map.¡±


    ¡° Please never stop doing this.¡±


    ¡°How are you guys doing at the moment?¡±


    Aglid sighed. ¡°Well, thanks to the shouting through the windows and the SC, you''ve noticed what''s going on here. The 641 is bullying us. At first it was this alleged QR rule that made them attack us on the tiles. Now they just keep attacking us on the tiles. They''re probably making up another great new rule after the fact that they just ''forgot'' to communicate.¡±


    Aglid grabbed the second piece of cake.


    ¡°You know, milady, we all stay out of Z2 now and don''t farm there anymore. 641 is terrible. And we wait... with a thousand pains, but also a lot of anticipation.¡±


    Lady Evelyne looked at Aglid in astonishment. ¡°What are you waiting for?¡±


    Aglid afforded himself a small, nasty, mischievous smile that you wouldn''t have thought him capable of.


    ¡°We were waiting for RxW to come and teach the 641 humility. It will be a happy day for us all.¡±


    Lady Evelyne grinned. ¡°So this GW is definitely going to be exciting. Two clear announcements are on the table, two cities that are determined to teach each other something. Will 641 teach 652 to fear or will 652 teach 641 humility? To be or not to be, that is the question here...¡±

 Were not mentioning Maximilian!

    ¡°I''d like to finish by telling you a fairy tale,¡± said Aglid thoughtfully.


    ¡°There was once a king. He wasn''t man enough to stand up to the chimera. So he disguised himself, put on women''s clothes and fled his city to become a courtesan to the king of the 652. He told his people that he would return to save them all. And they believed him.¡±


    Lady Evelyne smiled. ¡°Who are you talking about?¡±


    ¡°Isn''t that obvious? And isn''t the more interesting question: why do his people believe him?¡±


    Aglid stood up. ¡°I''ll be happy to let you think about it.¡±


    He said a friendly goodbye and disappeared outside into the darkness.


    ______________________________________________


    ¡°I don''t want to talk about Maximilian!¡± said an angry Genny, crossing her arms in front of her chest and staring defiantly ahead of her.


    ¡°Neither do I!¡± said Thunder Boo just as defiantly and also crossed his arms in front of his chest.


    The two of them sat next to each other on the kitchen bench at the kitchen table and looked as if they had been bitten by a huge bug.


    ¡°I had no intention of talking about Maximilian,¡± Lady Evelyne said carefully, ¡±is everything okay with you?¡±


    ¡°Yes,¡± growled Genny, ¡±as long as you don''t mention that name.¡±


    ¡°Ditto!¡± grumbled Thunder Boo and automatically looked under the kitchen table.


    Lady Evelyne had an inspiration. ¡°Oh... are you looking for your missing T4 again?¡±


    She hastily slapped her hand over her mouth.


    The two remained stubbornly silent.


    A soft, discreet whistle sounded outside the kitchen window.


    Lady Evelyne stepped to the window and leaned out. DmenAce was standing outside. He held his finger to his lips and furtively handed the lady three reports.


    Lady Evelyne looked briefly at the reports and understood.


    ¡°Would you like a piece of cake?¡± she asked the two stubborn people at the kitchen table as sweetly as she could and placed two plates in front of them.


    Genny stared at her plate in pleasant surprise. A pink wonder with lots of cream was literally smiling at her. Thunder Boo''s face also lit up. ¡°What''s that?¡±


    ¡°Raspberry cream cake,¡± the lady replied softly.


    The two smiled and began to scoop the cake into themselves.


    ¡°Also known as cake of comfort,¡± the lady continued.


    The two continued munching happily.


    ¡°Or also known as cake of defeat,¡± the lady finished her sentence.


    The two choked, coughed, dropped their cake forks and stared angrily at Evelyne. ¡°We don''t want to talk about Maximilian!¡±


    ¡°I don''t do that at all. But there are different types of cake. We once had cakes of victory, cakes of defeat and even cakes of punishment after the failed kill event. Everyone had to eat a piece of it, and we''d hung the vomit buckets on the garden fence to be on the safe side. Do you remember that, Genny? - We choked down the cake of punishment together, threw up together, then lay in each other''s arms and everything was fine again.¡±


    She placed another slice of raspberry cream cake in front of them.


    ¡°Believe me, after two pieces of cake of defeat, everything will be fine again.¡±


    ¡°All right!¡± said Genny reluctantly and began to eat the second slice, ¡±but only if you stop talking about Maximilian!¡±


    ¡°Exactly!¡± echoed Thunder Boo, ¡±never talk about Maximilian again!¡±


    ¡°I promise!¡± laughed the lady, ¡±but I''ll have to write about him. Because this one was pretty good.¡± She took a quick, furtive glance at the reports. ¡°Credit where credit is due... he made it into the legends.¡±


    And she noted the name ¡°Maximilian2744¡± legibly in her notebook.


    ________________________________________________


    ¡°You''re a fucking bunch of rich weirdos!¡± the Synergetics yelled in the direction of the 652, ¡±tomorrow is MD, we''re coming for you! You can''t spend anything but money!¡±


    ¡°That''s right!¡± Thunder shouted back, ¡±you don''t have to spend anything because you have the power of friendship! Unfortunately, we don''t have that!¡±


    ¡°Exactly! You force your members to spend money! You can only join if you''re rich enough!¡±


    ¡°Foot pics and bank balance must be sent to me to join RxW, that''s correct!¡± confirmed Thunder cheerfully.


    ¡°You''re ruining the whole game! RxW is actually totally weak, but you''re bullying everyone!¡± roared LittleBMF from [cAS] of 642, ¡±because of you, the game is no longer fun!¡±


    ¡°Are we supposed to cry now?¡± asked Biochest, dumbfounded, ¡±what does he expect?¡±


    ¡°Well, we still think the game is funny!¡± DmenAce yelled back, ¡±very much so!¡±


    ¡°You only live in this game! I''m offering you the chance to meet me in real life! I''ll smash your faces in! Come here and we''ll have it out in real life, if you dare!¡± LittleBMF shouted.


    Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more.


    ¡°Exactly!¡± joined BadMuthaFka from the same faction, ¡±meet me in the gym! If I win, I''ll own your accounts! If you win, I''ll be your farm!¡±


    Biochest looked extremely amused. ¡° Dude! You''ll become our farm anyway... we don''t have to meet anywhere in RL for that!¡±


    Stabbyunicorn from 641 shook her long blonde hair and shouted: ¡°Come on, who wants to join me, I bought new bedding and decorations for my prison cell! Why don''t you just let me take you prisoner voluntarily so I don''t have to fight! It''s also totally cozy and nice in my place!¡±


    ¡°Nobody wants to be with you!¡± shouted the donkey, ¡±simply because everyone here is gay!¡±


    ________________________________________________


    The massacre day started after the reset with the usual nastiness.


    First, poor RenaissancE was bashed. And as if that wasn''t enough, RxW''s attackers also renamed themselves ¡°Who are you???¡± and launched a gold box with the code ¡°Who the hell is RenaissancE?¡±. A big blow for someone who cared so much about his own fame and notoriety! However, RenaissancE could take comfort in the fact that even bad publicity was publicity. His fame would rise in any case! There was no way those bastards from RxW could prevent that!


    The leadership of Oof on the 656 demonstrated solidarity with their new ally and renamed themselves ¡°Light¡±, ¡°Love¡± and ¡°Peace¡±. Vind Tr?uble Turf even managed to write a few new love letters to his unforgotten Genny at the same time. The Alpha Dragon from the 642 incidentally revealed that he was an IRL truck driver, which made those who knew the secret code laugh out loud. MightyGuySensei from the same city wrote and sent out new fan mail.


    And then Sloth and Maximilian (yes, the very Maximilian whose name must not be mentioned...) of all people made a terrible mistake and picked the wrong victim.


    In the shadow of 656, a city that was now clearly weakened, the old samurai Irrr of [oAo] stood calmly and serenely, his gaze fixed on the distance. His breathing was steady and calm. He was completely focused, wasting no movement until it was necessary. The double attack from Sloth and Maximilian of the 641 rushed in with incredible force. And a tenth of a second before they struck, the samurai drew his katana-ken in one fluid motion and decapitated the raid leaders. Both of them.


    With a calm movement, he then wiped the sword clean and slid it back into its sheath. He hadn''t even lost his breath in the process. And not a hair of his neatly tied braid had slipped out of place. With a slight smile, he stepped back into the shadows.


    _____________________________________________


    Sloth, or Doink as he now called himself, couldn''t believe what had just happened.


    A moment ago he had had a head. Suddenly he had none.


    The attack should have been successful, and it should have been perfect. He should have hit it. But then it had gone ¡°DOINK!¡±. It''s probably the sound you hear when you drop your house key on the grating of the drain cover in the street... and it disappears jingling into it before you can even grab it.


    DOINK. The sound it makes when you suddenly run out of UB.


    DOINK. Bloody hell!


    _____________________________________________


    ¡°Sloth and Maximilian are both without an UB today!¡± the 652''s leadership informed their people, amused. ¡°They''re in jail of Irrr on 656.¡±


    The Thunder brothers roared with laughter.


    Biochest threw his arms in the air in horror. ¡°I taught them all that! The main raid leaders don''t perform high-risk attacks in front of the MD! Otherwise they''ll miss the arsenal fight! Did they even listen to me on the 641? I feel like I was talking to the wall!¡±


    ¡°Irrr is a tough opponent!¡± said the lady sympathetically. ¡°That''s one of the three Asian generals we had on the 656. Irrr, frogland and Ace. They all have their main accounts elsewhere and are no strangers. They deliberately play a weak city with secondary accounts to hone their skills. Of course, they''re completely underestimated on their secondary accounts... other people have fallen into that trap.¡±


    Several Thunder brothers snorted. ¡°Yeah, us for example. Insane losses in GW 1. Several million T4s gone like nothing...¡±


    ¡°That''s in the past,¡± consoled Lady Evelyne. ¡°Would you like a piece of cake? And may the name Maximilian be mentioned again?¡± she asked with a sideways glance at Genny.


    Genny grinned. ¡°Now yes!¡±


    _____________________________________________


    Lil Arrow on 641 was outraged beyond measure.


    Even the constant re-powdering by his R4 make-up artist didn''t help the red blotches on his face from indignation.


    ¡°I''ve written to Thunder and a few others from RxW,¡± he informed his leader Sloth, his voice quivering with anger, ¡±to see if we can''t work out some rules for the arsenal. I told him what rules we have for arsenal combat. No attacks on grey and so on.¡±


    ¡°And?¡± asked Sloth in a weak voice. He still wasn''t feeling well again. The loss of his UB had hit him hard.


    ¡°He told me he didn''t care about our rules! And he laughed at me! And everyone else I wrote to laughed at me too! It''s outrageous. These clowns and jokers from RxW spoil the game and make a mockery of everything, so serious play is no longer possible!¡±


    ¡°I also asked there,¡± sighed Saint, ¡±if we could agree on the rules.¡±


    ¡°And?¡± croaked Sloth desperately.


    ¡°The boss hasn''t even spoken to me personally. But he has told me through his negotiator that there is only one rule: That we bend over and don''t beg for lube.¡±


    Lil Arrow swooned.


    _____________________________________________


    Stabbyunicorn galloped first through the desert, then across the green meadow of 656. It was meant to be, it had to be, that she could save her leader''s UB! It was up to her now... she was one of the last remaining raid leaders...


    With the courage of desperation, she jumped over the last wall, determined to do whatever she had to do.


    Next to her, a swift movement was more likely to be sensed than seen. A firm grip on her mane, then on her horn, froze her in place. The samurai stood right beside her, holding her without the slightest discernible effort.


    ¡°Girl, would you like to keep your horn?¡± he whispered gently in her ear.


    Stabbyunicorn gasped in shock.


    Irrr smiled and drew his sword. ¡°If you want to keep it, you should return to the 641 very quickly. If not, I''m going to turn you into an ordinary horse here and now. I''m sure Candycane will be happy to ride you afterwards, he has experience.¡±


    Stabbyunicorn fled. She galloped back to 641 as quickly as possible. At least she had tried! She could take credit for that. Kir Bear, on the other hand, hadn''t even come online yet.


    _____________________________________________


    All hell broke loose in front of the White House on 642. The noise was so enormous that Mr. Trump was disturbed in his Oval Office and went out into the corridor to see what was going on.


    ¡°A demonstration,¡± his head of security, Miss Laura, told him with a frown, ¡±We''re keeping them at a distance. But a few people are going pretty crazy right now.¡±


    There were even chants outside now.


    Mr. Trump opened the window.


    ¡°RxW, we love you!¡± chanted several members of TTH, holding up banners and posters that read: ¡®Thunder for president in 642!¡¯, ¡±Down with the A0L dictatorship! RxW is freedom!¡± and ¡®RxW are the best!¡¯.


    ¡°This is treason!¡± Mr. Trump yelled angrily out the window, ¡±You belong to our city!¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but we''ve been mistreated by you all along!¡± yelled back Voodoo Ulya from TTH, ¡±We''re just waiting for RxW to come and kick your ass! And then we''ll go to them!¡±


    ¡°Have you completely lost your minds? They don''t even want you!¡± Mr. Trump got upset, ¡±Please don''t imagine that you''re allowed to join RxW! They''ll put you in some wing and you''ll do the menial jobs like kitchen work and stuff like that!¡±


    ¡°Hey!¡± came the indignant cry from the direction of 652, where Lady Evelyne had torn open the window, ¡±don''t tell any untruths here! I''ll do the menial kitchen work! We''ll do that ourselves!¡±


    ¡°You stay out of this!¡± raged Mr. Trump, ¡±This is an internal matter for the 642!¡±


    ¡°Yeah, obviously not if your townspeople think we''re better than you!¡±


    Mr. Trump slammed the window shut and turned to Miss Laura. ¡°Burn those guys from TTH out there. All of them!¡±


    Miss Laura sighed. ¡°Chief, they have cake bowls on their heads...¡±


    ¡°Then burn their posters and banners! Burn something! I want to see fire!¡±


    And while Miss Laura dutifully made sure that all the posters and banners were burned, another wonderful day of massacre came to an end. But it was not to be the last in this GW...

 Lessons

    ¡°For heaven''s sake! Does your husband know you''re here?¡± Lady Evelyne asked the late visitor at the back door of her kitchen, slightly horrified. ¡°And your alliance partner? Are you sure you won''t get into trouble?¡±


    Kitana from 656 quickly and quietly flitted into the kitchen like a shadow. She giggled. ¡°My husband knows, but I don''t let him tell me what to do anyway. The alliance partner doesn''t know, but I don''t let them tell me anything either. Does anyone else need to know? I don''t think so!¡±


    She hugged the lady warmly. ¡°How are you, my dear? We miss you terribly!¡±


    The lady returned the hug with warmth.


    ¡°I''m doing very well, thank you! Apart from the fact that I''m still missing the promised spa hotel, of course, but I''m hoping that the boss will remedy the situation at some point and have one built. How are you?¡±


    Kitana waved her hand. ¡°Don''t ask! We''ve been through a terrible city war. Both sides were screaming for you and cursing the fact that you changed cities. Argh. Never mind. Right now we have a truce of sorts, we hope it holds.¡±


    She looked around curiously. ¡°But the kitchen here has a significantly different dimension to the one on 656!¡±


    Lady Evelyne sighed: ¡°There are a lot more people here! And Marzzzz slips new, updated membership lists under my door every day. There are more every day!¡±


    Kitana grinned: ¡°You don''t want to come back? It''s much less stressful here!¡±


    The lady grinned too. ¡°Is that why you came here?¡±


    Kitana shook her head. ¡°No, I have two reasons. Firstly, an invitation. To you and Genny.¡± She placed two cards on the table. ¡°A little show at our dungeon. It''s full and we want some of those - well. Everyone''s begging for invitations to watch, but we only want you and Genny there.¡±


    Lady Evelyne laughed heartily. ¡°Oh, we''re very honored! Thank you! No wonder everyone wants to go. I''m sure Genny will be delighted too. And reason 2?¡±


    Kitana looked determined: ¡°I want to take lessons! In baking cakes! With you!¡±


    Lady Evelyne burst out laughing. ¡°This is the first time anyone has ever wanted to learn something from me! I''m very flattered!¡±


    Kitana looked a little uncertain. ¡°You know, everyone here wants cake now too... they''re always reading about it in your book... everyone''s always hungry... will you do it, will you teach me?¡±


    ¡°Of course,¡± said Lady Evelyne gleefully, ¡±it''s not that difficult. If you manage to sneak across the city limits regularly, we''ll manage. Just make sure no one catches you!¡±


    ¡°I will,¡± Kitana promised. ¡°And you and Genny take good care when you visit us, okay? I''ll come to the first lesson tomorrow evening, if it''s convenient for you too!¡±


    And just as stealthily as the visitor had arrived, she disappeared again.


    __________________________________________


    In the White House on 642, Mr. Trump had happily signed his first decrees.


    This day had gone much better than all the others, because the cake bowls had finally fallen off the heads at TTH, and most had failed to replace them in time. As a result, TTH was on fire. Almost all of them. And their cries in the distance were music to Mr. Trump''s ears.


    Now he was tinkering with a large banner himself. It was important to create a kind of corporate identity for his city. The fact that he had entered into an alliance with the 641 had great advantages for him. Nevertheless, it could not be denied that 641 was the stronger and therefore superior alliance partner. That didn''t suit Mr. Trump. It was high time to counter this.


    Mr. Trump had to admit that 641 had not done a bad job. The founding of a sect at the beginning of GW had enormously strengthened the city''s corporate identity, which was primarily based on the aspects of love, friendship and family. The city''s personality was unique, the recognition effect was high and the success was impressive. The triad ¡°Light! Love! Peace!¡±, with which the triple raids of the Synergetics were introduced was also brilliant. The whole thing was communicatively and medially accompanied by the visually powerful missionary magazines. Then there was the cult leader''s image change and his inimitable ¡°DOINK!¡± sound, which was now heard throughout the entire bracket whenever someone lost his UB. Damn! The 641 must have had an incredibly good image consultant to pull it off like that.


    He thought of his own image consultants and sighed. His R4 team worried him anyway. He suspected that they were secretly writing fan mail to the enemy. Unfortunately, you couldn''t really trust anyone in this turmoil of war. Except himself, of course!


    He finished the work on his banner. He took one last look and then nodded with satisfaction.


    It was ready to be presented to the public!


    He made his way to the upper floor and stepped out onto the front balcony. Downstairs, his supporters were already waiting, rounded up by faction message, holding their breath to cheer at just the right time.


    ¡°Ready?¡± he asked his two R4s, who were holding the banner on either side. MightGuySensei and The Alpha Dragon nodded. Then, with a grand gesture, they unfurled the banner, which spanned the entire width of the balcony.


    ¡°Make 642 grate again!¡± the supporters read in confusion.


    ¡°What on earth does he mean by that? What are we supposed to do?¡± they whispered to each other in confusion, while they all cheered as loudly as they could as ordered.


    Mr. Trump smiled with satisfaction. He spread his arms. ¡°Yes, my dear people, my friends, this is our slogan for the coming period: Make 642 great again! - That''s mine, that''s why it''s so brilliant. It expresses everything I want from you and from this GW.¡± He was beaming all over his face.


    MightGuySensei coughed. ¡°Boss, it doesn''t say great, it says grate!¡±


    ¡°What, how, where?¡± Trump stared headlong down at his banner.


    This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.


    ¡°Oh, such a stupid spelling mistake! I made a mistake! Damn it! Quick, bring me the color again... I have to fix that right away!¡±


    ¡°Maybe he should practise that again!¡± whispered The Alpha Dragon, ¡±or take a few hours of writing lessons with a specialist...¡±


    The burning TTH-ers in the distance laughed their heads off.


    ______________________________________


    ¡°You''re such a goddamn striver!¡± roared Captain Zax, ¡°it''s not fair! I feel bad all the time when I see your scorecards!¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah? Then I could also feel bad when I see your battle results!¡± Lady Evelyne scolded back, ¡±you know, my problem is: I have no skills! Of course, I''ll at least try to perform good in the other areas!¡±


    ¡°You call that good? GOOD? I saw your result at the FCU, Miss All-Front-With-Me! And look at your house, Miss Five-Star! Four was the target, damn it! Why do you have five?¡±


    ¡°I''m a perfectionist and an overachiever!¡±


    ¡°You''re a goddamn striver!¡±


    ¡°Yes, because of me! That''s even true somewhere! But now I have to go to class!¡±


    ¡°Oh, you''re taking lessons too?¡± Zax scoffed and had to hold on to the doorframe because he couldn''t walk completely straight.


    ¡°Yes, and you''re drunk!¡±


    ¡°I''m sure you sit at the front of the class, you''re always reporting, you always know everything better and you bring the teacher an apple for every lesson!¡±


    ¡°A piece of cake!¡± hissed Lady Evelyne, who had packed up her books and exercise books and was now reaching for the prepared plate with the piece of cake, ¡±and now let me through, damn it, or I''ll be late for my class!¡±


    ¡°Why does the teacher get a piece of cake and I don''t?¡± protested Zax.


    ¡°Because you''re the captain and not the teacher! When I come back, you can have a slice for all I care, but for now it''s class time!¡±


    The lady energetically pushed Zax aside and hurried off so as not to be late.


    __________________________________________


    In the Church of Synergy, they had just finished their morning circle of chairs and breakfast together with mate tea and millet cookies when three younger members had the idea that they could sneak over to the clan castle of the 652.


    The night had not gone well. Thunder had executed Co1inga from [SY3], and two of A0L''s underbosses, Christ and EvilKermit, had also been killed. And it wasn''t even massacre day at the moment. High time to see if there was anything they could do to stop these bastards! It was enough just to manage to eavesdrop on them or play a nasty trick on them.


    And so the three young synergetics set off secretly and without telling anyone.


    The newly constructed flat building on the side of the 652 clan castle immediately caught their attention and they stalked towards it as carefully as possible. Voices could be heard from inside, someone was lecturing.


    What was that, a classroom? The three of them put their heads together in anticipation. This promised to be a lot of fun!


    ___________________________________________


    Meanwhile, the class was sitting in the newly built classroom.


    Lady Evelyne had just managed to enter the room before the teacher. She placed the plate with the piece of cake on the teacher''s desk at the front and scurried to her seat in the front row. Zax had not been wrong in his suspicions. He had known her for a while now.


    Then the teacher had appeared and had first asked them to do the tasks from the previous day and wanted to see their progress. As they presented their results one by one, several of them became aware of the rustling outside the window and the giggling that was only suppressed with difficulty.


    As she was sitting at the front and closest to the door anyway, Lady Evelyne jumped up and pulled it open.


    Just in time. Outside, three Synergetics she didn''t know had positioned themselves and were trying to take photos of the class through the windows with their cell phones.


    Teachers and pupils immediately pulled scarves or masks over their faces, Lady Evelyne held her position in the doorway. ¡°Hey, you three, what are you doing? What are you doing here?¡± she shouted indignantly.


    ¡°Hihihihi, RxW has a school class!¡± the three of them railed, ¡±you can do so little that you have to be sent to remedial classes! And at this stage of the game!¡±


    The three of them were almost rolling on the floor laughing.


    ¡°Yes, and?¡± asked Lady Evelyne irritably, pushing herself into the doorway so that she could cleverly block the view of the rest of the class, ¡±it''s no secret that I can''t do anything, everyone can know that. And everything else is none of your business!¡±


    ¡°You''re the noobs from RxW, hahaha!¡±


    ¡°And you''re the schoolyard bullies, or what?¡±


    ¡°We will make you all public! But only after we''ve smacked you a few!¡± the largest of the Synergetics roared gleefully and stood up in front of Lady Evelyne. His two cronies eagerly closed in on his left and right.


    A hand placed itself on Lady Evelyne''s shoulder from behind. It was the teacher, who was now wearing a mask.


    ¡°Leave it to me,¡± he said calmly.


    Lady Evelyne moved aside with a smile.


    The teacher stepped out onto the small forecourt. He squinted into the still low morning sun and looked small and inconspicuous against the three tall guys.


    The rest of the class had gathered at the windows and were holding their breath.


    The two parties stood opposite each other, and at first it seemed as if nothing was happening at all. Then there was a tiny, barely perceptible movement from the master. He seemed to turn slightly to the side and stretch out the flat of his hand a little, but nothing more could be seen. He stood still in complete silence and squinted into the sun. The three synergists swayed, then buckled and simply fell over where they had just been standing. Silence.


    The teacher turned around and re-entered the classroom. He had simply left the three of them outside.


    ¡°Oh my God, sensei, how did you do that?¡± the students whispered in fascination, staring back and forth between the three unconscious Synergetics and their master.


    ¡°Oh, it''s nothing. Just a little thing. Nothing of importance,¡± said the teacher, who was visibly uncomfortable with all the attention, ¡±and please, don''t keep calling me sensei. I don''t like that at all. Just say my name. I''m just a normal player like you, nothing special or even a master.¡±


    ¡°Are we going to learn that too?¡±


    ¡°Sure, it''s not that difficult. But today we want to continue with the formations first. Tomorrow I''m planning a practical exercise so that you can apply it yourself. You''ll learn best if you can test the theory in a practical exercise.¡±


    ¡°And if we make mistakes? Are you angry with us then?¡±


    The teacher shook his head in annoyance.


    ¡°You''re all here for a reason - you''re self-reflective, you know where your shortcomings are, and you all want to learn and are willing to listen. This class is handpicked. I don''t teach everyone. I don''t teach anyone who isn''t willing to listen and learn. I don''t teach guys like those out there who think they don''t need to learn anything at this stage of the game. And I will never be angry with you if you make mistakes, have questions or can''t do something yet. But I will be very angry with anyone who dares to laugh at you for it.¡±


    ¡°It was noticeable!¡± whispered Lady Evelyne to the person sitting next to her after a sideways glance at the Synergetics lying outside.


    ¡°Now please come up to me one by one with your exercise books. I would like to check that you have correctly completed the exercises on the different applications of the formations in the manor and in the building fights.¡±


    _______________________________________________


    YoungDKZ had retired to his new room in the 641 clan castle with a pile of mission magazines. He enthusiastically read page after page. Light! Love! Peace! And, of course, the true value of friendship. That was what it was all about. And that wasn''t enough for him on the 652. This cold, harsh city... this ruthless dictator as boss... the constant primacy of money and credit cards... no, that wasn''t for him! That''s why he had quietly and discreetly changed cities.


    He felt like a newborn. Away from the financial aristocracy at last. Into what this game was really all about. Family! He immersed himself in the missionary magazines again.


    _______________________________________________


    Mr. Trump''s corrected banner was finally hanging on the balcony of the White House. Still aggrieved that a stupid spelling mistake had almost ruined one of the most beautiful and uplifting moments of this GW, Mr. Trump left the white house through the front door without turning around for the time being and decided to look at his work from a distance.


    He walked briskly along the driveway to the wrought-iron gate and turned around.


    He froze.


    His banner hanging from the balcony now correctly read ¡°Make 642 great again!¡±.


    But down below, across the front door, someone had sprayed ¡°Make 642 to a grate again!¡± in huge letters with horrible pink spray paint. It was easy to tell who had done it from the ash flakes blowing down the driveway.


    Mr. Trump threw a tantrum.

 Another shade of Grey

    On the night of the massacre day, the donkey stood in his box in the stable and waited.


    He slyly watched the hands of the clock as they slowly approached the reset.


    Ten seconds before they hit their target, he quietly unlatched the door to his stall with his mouth and crept across the thick straw-covered floor to the neighboring stall.


    Here Candycane''s gay horse slept unsuspectingly, standing up, as horses do, but with its head lowered and eyes closed. It snored and farted contentedly in its sleep.


    The donkey moved quietly and unnoticed into position. He did not take his eyes off the hands of the clock. At the moment the reset started, the donkey lunged hard with its hindquarters and rammed both hind hooves into the poor horse''s belly with full force.


    The horse was wide awake at once, whinnying shrilly in shock and striking out with all four hooves at the same time, which was of no use to him as the donkey had long since dashed back into its own box. Satisfied, he listened to the horse''s cries and ate his carrots in the meantime.


    ___________________________________________


    Candycane himself hadn''t noticed any of the action; he used the reset at the beginning of the night for a hot threesome with Dimented and MafiaFreyja. They officially called it a ¡°kill trade¡± so that no one realized what the three of them were actually doing. Well. Everyone in that damn bracket knew what it meant when two or more people retreated to an alleged ¡°kill trade¡±! It was always the same. ¡°Fifty shades of Grey¡± was nothing compared to that. But everyone pretended not to know this official, unofficial code and pretended to be as serious as he or she could.


    _____________________________________________


    Marzzzz and DmenAce were sitting at the kitchen table with their arms crossed and angry expressions, staring angrily ahead of them.


    Lady Evelyne came in the door just then and stopped, dumbfounded. ¡°What''s wrong with you two?¡±


    ¡°We don''t want to talk about Maximilian,¡± growled Marzzzz.


    ¡°Exactly. We''re not mentioning his name. He''s the one whose name can''t be mentioned,¡± DmenAce added gloomily.


    Lady Evelyne automatically reached into the fridge and pulled out the raspberry and cream tart. ¡°A slice or two? How bad is it?¡±


    ¡°Three,¡± grumbled DmenAce, ¡±give each of us three. And don''t mention his name. And please don''t give him an honorary title either. I know you like to do that without considering that it''s the enemy. And that''s mean. Towards us. We are your brothers, after all!¡± He managed to put on a preemptively offended face.


    Lady Evelyne felt that she had been caught out. The title of honor for the main character of the next chapter was already written large and clear on the current page of her notebook: ¡°Maximilan2744, the Raid Eater¡±.


    _____________________________________________


    Apart from the one whose name could not be mentioned, the night had started very well. Whether in the White House or at the Church of Synergy, everyone got caught. KIRINZAN and KVNTZY, Zoro Roronora and TheBoy09, willuss and CrasoWI, ciara1989 and LukeMan, Rodrigo RDuterte and even the wonderful MightGuySensei. RxW''s kill machine was running non-stop and stopped at nothing.


    In the Church of Synergy, Stabbyunicorn felt compelled to give a little speech.


    ¡°Dear members,¡± she began bravely during the morning circle of chairs, which was repeatedly interrupted by the sound of shells outside, ¡±I know that times are not easy for us. Nevertheless, I would ask you not to lose heart and, above all, your faith. The bottom line is: we are the good guys! The others are the bad guys. So we will win in the end, because good always wins. The power of our faith is with us...¡± There was a crash. Frightened, some members threw themselves on the floor and crawled under their chairs. ¡°The power of our faith is with us,¡± Stabbyunicorn continued angrily, ¡±and that is something the other side lacks. Don''t be impressed by their appearance! It may seem scary for a moment, but they are actually weak. Their aggressiveness only shows that they are afraid. Yes, they are very afraid of us, I can feel it! That''s what my findings from my private meditation yesterday tell me.¡± She paused for a moment. Maximilian took advantage of this and wanted to take the talking animal away from her, but Stabbyunicorn glared at him angrily and held the talking animal firmly. ¡°Then I have something else to tell you,¡± she began again, struggling to keep her voice steady, ¡±our beloved leader Sloth had to leave us for personal reasons.¡± The members of the Church of Synergy cried out in horror, and the circle of chairs was briefly thrown into disarray. Stabbyunicorn waited until her R4 had restored calm, then continued: ¡°He sends his regards to you all. His account will stay here, Saint will take it over. So not much will change in terms of play. Only our souls will miss him a lot.¡± Stabbyunicorn pulled out a handkerchief and had to blow her nose. ¡°Where''s Sloth now?¡± shouted a shy girl from the group. ¡°Quiet, shut up, you don''t have the talking animal!¡± she was immediately admonished by the others. Stabbyunicorn sighed. ¡°Sloth wasn''t doing well here at the end... he''s in a phase of self-discovery now. He needs a bit of rest and has therefore decided to stay in the East Indies. There''s a new ashram there that has a very good reputation. Sloth left there yesterday. Let''s wish him good luck on his journey to himself. May his new guru help him. He''s supposed to be a real authority on self-discovery, this guru - what''s his name? - Mink.¡±


    _____________________________________________


    ¡°I don''t enjoy it anymore!¡± roared WHY TRY from [A0L], ¡±I''m going to sell this account! Let someone else deal with it!¡±


    ¡°You have to believe in yourselves, please!¡± begged Stabbyunicorn from the Church of Synergy, ¡±otherwise we might as well give up!¡±


    ¡°Nobody gives up here!¡± shouted MightGuySensei from [A0L], ¡±but some will end up as doormats!¡±


    ¡°Right!¡± yelled General Stas01 from 651, ¡±Cezar, for example! And where''s my donut anyway?¡±


    ¡°You''re a duck!¡± shouted Just Nakash of the Church of Synergy, ¡±you''re all ducks! And there''s a duck chapter coming!¡±


    ¡°I don''t care who you are, because I''m leaving this town!¡± clamored BadMuthaFcka of [cAS], ¡±but urgent request goes out to RxW: Please, please burn [A0L] to the ground, and I will be forever in your debt!¡±


    _____________________________________________


    The night of nights! The night when the male players suddenly started calling their female teammates ¡°Mistress¡± instead of ¡°Sis¡±, when the paddles were unpacked and everyone enjoyed either spanking or being spanked. Kill Trade! It''s unbelievable what could be hidden behind this code.


    Even the boss of the 652 himself leaned teasingly against the wall of the entrance hall, looked at the Korean Kodaxx with an interested expression and breathed languidly: ¡°Would you like to do Kill Trade with me?¡±


    Only the donkey stood in his stall, rolled his eyes and grumbled: ¡°Do it properly or not at all! Just kick the damn horse and don''t ask for long! But that just goes to show how fucking gay you all are!¡±


    ________________________________________


    The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.


    SY3 had moved into position at Arsenal IV. With the support of other Synergy factions from the Church, of course. The enemy was ¡°only¡± RXD, but you could just as easily say: The enemy was RXD after all! So it was better not to take any risks. RxW had already taken three arsenals themselves, now it was obviously RXD''s turn. But nothing would be left to them here without a fight!


    Teddy Bear Saint had everything under control. Until the raid master arrived - Ghost himself. Saint, quite contrary to his name, cursed. Lots of reinforcements from the Church of Syngergy arrived, with whole crates full of mission journals. It had to be possible to deal with the Ghost!


    Just as they were about to start, there was a cheerful roar: ¡°Yoo-hoo, 641!¡±


    Saint turned around and his eyes almost popped out of his head. Beyond the fence, the RxW raid team had taken up position.


    ¡°What the hell are you doing here? This isn''t your arsenal!¡± shouted Saint, ¡±fuck off!¡±


    ¡°Yeah, fuck off!¡± yelled Sparkle farts boldly, casting angry glances at the jeering crowd at the fence, who were now setting up folding benches and popping popcorn to make matters worse.


    ¡°It''s not our arsenal, but it''s our city!¡± laughed Thunder, ¡±that''s obvious, isn''t it? All the buildings go to the RxW family, Gollum even wrote that into the rules in your city hall!¡±


    ¡°Our city hall is none of your fucking business!¡± scolded Saint, ¡°get the fuck out!¡±


    ¡°No!¡± giggled Ivy, ¡±we''ll shove the sparkle farts back up Sparkle fart''s ass first! And the mission journals right after!¡±


    The Church of Synergy went off the rails. The raidmaster from RXD in the arsenal, the laughing raid team from RxW at the fence, you hardly knew where to focus your attention. Suddenly a loud ¡°DOINK!¡± was heard.


    ¡°Shit!¡± yelled Saint, ¡±where''s the UB? Who''s got a UB here?¡±


    Behind the fence, Thunder had climbed onto a bench and raised his hand in plain sight. He elegantly twirled something in the air with two fingers.


    ¡°What''s he got there? What''s he got there?¡± screeched Sparkle farts in panic, trying to get rid of the trapper''s UB in time.


    Saint squinted his eyes. It went ¡°DOINK!¡± again, Sparkle farts screamed, behind the fence the next raid was started immediately.


    The little thing between Thunder''s fingers flashed in the sun.


    ¡°Damn it, it''s a credit card! He''s got a credit card!¡± yelled Saint, startled, ¡±Retreat! Retreat immediately! Get out of here while we still can!¡±


    And in a mad panic and completely unsorted formation, the synergists ran off to save themselves in their hive as quickly as possible, regardless of what happened to the arsenal.


    _______________________________________


    At the next Arsenal, number VIII, the Synergetics were in for a wonderful little surprise. Led by Stabbyunicorn, SY4 was waiting to make its grand entrance. Fortunately, there was no RxW raid team in sight this time. Stabbyunicorn breathed a sigh of relief - finally being able to work in peace without feeling constantly watched by those psychopaths and perverts, that was something!


    Suddenly, a small account teleported next to the arsenal. It was a really small account. A loser account from a loser city. Stabbyunicorn snorted contemptuously. What was he doing here? Was he tired of life? She immediately sent an attack at him.


    ¡°Uh-oh!¡± there was a distant yowl from the 652''s clan castle, where half of RxW was glued to the binoculars, ¡±Watch out, Stabby! Watch out! It''s frogland!¡±


    Who was that supposed to be? Stabbyunicorn didn''t give a cent to this shouting. They were just trying to unsettle her, nothing more! As always! These traitors from the city of traitors were all the same!


    Genny chuckled and fought with Black over the binoculars. ¡°They haven''t read the first volume of Legends, those idiots! Otherwise they''d know who frogland is! He hasn''t even changed his name yet!¡±


    Thunder Boo groaned softly. ¡°Yeah, he was a painful experience, that frogland... over a million T4s...¡± Various other RxW fighters also nodded in painful experience.


    ¡°Fuck off!¡± was the last thing heard from Stabbyunicorn from around the arsenal. Then her troops hit frogland. And were - gone.


    ¡°YES!¡± the Thunder brothers roared enthusiastically and cheered over to the arsenal.


    Stabbyunicorn scrambled to her feet. Just in time to see that her comrades were also in the middle of sending off. ¡°NO! - NO! - NO!¡± she screamed desperately, waving her hands in the air. Too late. DOINK!¡± it sounded as El grito De Lulu''s UB landed in frogland''s jail, and ¡®DOINK!¡¯ hooted the Thunder brothers at the windows of their clan castle.


    Frogland waved a casual greeting over to 652 and skipped away, but not before politely saying goodbye in the SC. ¡°Tell me,¡± he addressed the Church of Synergy, ¡±do you train your raid leaders at the Arsenal? But why are you doing this with real T4 troops? I''d recommend a less costly training situation for that... and in general, I''d recommend practicing more...¡±


    ____________________________________


    ¡°I told you, some end up as doormats,¡± sighed MightGuySensei.


    ¡°I still haven''t gotten a donut!¡± complained General Stas01.


    ¡°Nobody cares about your donut! You''re a duck!¡± sneered Just Nakash, ¡±by the way, I''ll zero anyone who tags me in SC! Just stop it, you bastards!¡±


    _____________________________________


    At Arsenal II, the Church of Synergy''s luck was tested again.


    The synergetics of SY0 howled as the RxW raid team chilled at the fence just in time for the opening. ¡°Leave us alone already! This isn''t your arsenal! You''re not even registered here yet!¡±


    ¡°We want to watch!¡± roared the Thunder brothers, their mouths full of popcorn and beer.


    ¡°Get the fuck out of here! You fucking peeping toms and stalkers!¡±


    ¡°Don''t be so mean to us! We just want to watch you do it! Maybe we''ll learn something from you progamers!¡±


    ¡°You want to trick us and then shout ¡°DOINK!¡±!¡±


    ¡°No, we''re not doing that!¡±


    ¡°Yes, you will!¡±


    ¡°No!¡±


    ¡°Yes, you will!¡±


    The Church of Synergy had had enough. Cursing, they packed up their things and fled home. Their members would come back at a later date, when these nutters had lost the desire to hang over the fence in front of an empty arsenal and eat popcorn!


    Unfortunately, things didn''t look very rosy at home either. The hive of the 641 resembled a military hospital, and everyone was greeted at the entrance by a gloomy-looking Maximilian.


    ¡°And what happened to you?¡± he grumbled, staring sternly at everyone returning home.


    ¡°I don''t want to talk about it!¡± was the most common reply.


    ¡°Leave me alone!¡± nagged Samuel L Catson. ¡°Besides, you''re only allowed to talk here if you''re holding the talking animal!¡±


    Maximilian raised his hand. He held up the small plush sloth for all to see.


    Samuel L Catson crossed his arms in front of his chest and remained defiantly silent.


    ¡°You don''t look well, brother,¡± Maximilian tried again. ¡°You''re a little - deranged?¡±


    ¡°I don''t want to talk about it!¡±


    ¡°Where''s your UB?¡±


    ¡°I don''t want to talk about it!¡±


    ¡°And why are our mission journals hanging out of your ass?¡±


    ¡°I DON''T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!¡±


    _______________________________________


    In the kitchen of 652, a late visitor was just saying goodbye to Lady Evelyne and Poison Ivy. Kitana from 656 hadn''t missed the chance to come to the evening baking class despite the MD and had just taken off her kitchen apron. The cheesecake they baked together was a sight to behold. She carefully wrapped up half of it for her group, leaving half for dessert in 652''s clan castle.


    ¡°Oh, by the way,¡± she smiled cheerfully and nudged the lady, ¡±I have another present for you!¡±


    ¡°A present? For me?¡± said the lady delightedly, ¡±but for what?¡±


    ¡°Well, for teaching me to bake! And I thought to myself, you have so much work here and everything - you could do with some help.¡±


    Kitana slipped outside, giggling, and seemed to be dragging in a large parcel that she had leaned against the wall outside. It was only when she went into the kitchen and into the light that it became apparent that the parcel was moving and apparently alive. Kitana pulled the hood off the head of the ¡°parcel¡± with a jerk, revealing a very angry, but also very helpless, bound and gagged Cezar underneath.


    ¡°Oh!¡± cried Lady Evelyne delightedly, ¡±an angry Russian! I''ve got another one!¡±


    ¡°Exactly!¡± Kitana laughed, ¡±I thought you could use a kitchen slave here. No one here likes him anyway - I had to kick him out of our faction for saying impossible things and then he just carried on in the city. So I grabbed him today and thought he could at least make himself useful here with you. I''ve already whipped him once at home, just keep doing it if he doesn''t obey.¡±


    ¡°I can do that!¡± declared Poison Ivy enthusiastically, ¡±that really is a great gift. And we can put it to incredibly good use. Thank you, you''re a real sweetie!¡±


    ¡°Always happy to help,¡± Kitana winked at the two of them and said her final goodbyes to make it back home in time for the reset.


    ______________________________________


    Someone else was waiting for the reset, and that was the donkey.


    He kept a careful eye on the hands of the clock. When there was only half a minute or so until the reset, he quietly unlatched the door to his box with his mouth and crept over to the box of Candycane''s gay horse. The horse was asleep.


    This time it had positioned itself so that its belly was protected by the wall. Instead, his fat backside and everything dangling underneath was now pointing unprotected towards the door. Grinning, the donkey crept into the box and got into position. Keeping an eye on the clock, he timed the last few seconds. Then, with pinpoint accuracy, he struck out hard with his hindquarters and kicked the horse right in the balls.


    While the horse went down, whinnying loudly and thrashing about, the donkey had long since returned to its box and listened contentedly to the tower bells ringing out the reset.


    And because the bells were so loud and everyone was busy with other things anyway, only the unfortunate horse could hear the donkey singing happily in the neighboring box:


    ¡°Jingle balls, jingle balls, jingle all the way! Donkey''s the only straight one here, the rest of you are gay!¡±