《to my captain》


 A New Beginning

    <u>A new beginning</u>


    The school ended without a farewell, exams, or memories of our last high school year. Students born in the early 2000s have guessed it!


    The Pandemic took away one of the best years of our life, the last school year. Most people would have hated their school time for many reasons. But for me, it was different. One of the best phases of my life I had was when I was in school.


    Now came the next phase of one¡¯s life, which is college life. Our first year we couldn¡¯t go to the college. our classes were in online mode. For my second year of college the classes were shifted back to offline mode and now the time has arrived me to go Delhi. Without any expectations, I packed my bags. I just laid down on my bed, looking at the ceilings with a lot of questions in my head about whether I would survive in a new place with a new culture and with new people around. It''s not just one or two kilometres away, it''s 2631 km from Delhi to Kerala. I have never stayed that far away from my home in my entire life. While all this thought was running through my head, I felt her arms on my belly pushing me closer towards her. I could feel my Amma¡¯s heavy breath, but more than that I noticed her deep eyes. I felt like her eyes were talking to me. It was telling me to stay with her. She wanted me to go to college in Kerala so that I could be with her for more time. But she didn¡¯t say any of her thoughts. She wanted me to fly high and achieve what she couldn¡¯t in her life. Just like all typical Indian mothers, she started to give me advice, but I felt it was more like warnings rather than advice. I hugged her tightly with my right leg on top of her body and I kissed her cheeks. There was a moment of silence between us after some time my Amma asked me;


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    ¡°Have u ever fallen in love?¡±


    I chuckled and said, ¡°Not yet, but I think I am anti-romantic, Amma, and I don¡¯t believe in love.¡±


    Turning towards me, she said, ¡°While that¡¯s what everyone says before they fall in love.¡±


    ¡°Well, not me.¡±


    That night she told me something that I still do treasure in my heart: ¡°love is like a burning flame, play with caution. I am never telling you to not to fall in love and I can¡¯t say you won¡¯t get hurt in love, but you should be always wise and don¡¯t let the flame to consume you fully.¡±


    She kissed on my forehead and hugged me tightly and as usual she bit me in my hand and that¡¯s my Amma¡¯s love language.


    Thinking about not sleeping with her in my enormous bed tomorrow night, I closed my eyes. I wanted to cry but I couldn¡¯t because I knew inside that if I cry, then she will be more upset. With all this thought. I drifted off into a deep sleep.

 CHAPTER 2 - FLY

    Chapter 2


    <u>FLY</u>


    My luggage was so heavy that even my father alone could not load it into the car with ease. He gave me a look that actually proved his point that when it comes to packing luggage, I always take the unnecessary and unwanted stuffs.


    I always looked up to my father because of his dedication to everything he does and his disciplined life. Seeing your parents growing old is one of the most hurtful scenes in your life. Those pictures of them will make you want to strive so hard to give them a life they wanted. I can feel the emotions running through my father''s head, but he is maintaining his composure so hard that he doesn¡¯t want to break down in front of me.


    The three-hour journey to the airport was silent. As usual, my mother started to sleep as soon as we left our house. She didn¡¯t even care the loud music being played in the car to help my father not fall asleep. I was in the backseat of my car with thousands of thoughts running through my head. When I was passing each of the golden street lights of the highway, I was telling myself just like these street lamps passing away quickly, each chapter of my life will be turning quickly even before I could realize.


    Suddenly I started to miss my school days, and I realized I could never go to a phase again like that. With all these thoughts going on in my mind, I took a deep breath, then I looked at my father and he told me something that brought me to ease. He told me ¡°That everyone will take time to adjust to a new place. Sometimes not all the places are welcoming, some places are unwelcoming too. But whatever be the situation, our approach will change the quotation of any situation.¡±


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    I nodded my head and looked at him. Then he continued,


    ¡°I know it hurts, but sometimes the best medicine is to tuck yourself in like your mother used to and let the comfort of sleep wash over you. When you wake up, a favourite meal might make things feel a little brighter.¡±


    Papa knew that I was worried about starting everything new. He started to say about Delhi. He said ¡°even people say the capital of India is highly air polluted but once you go there you will feel like sacrificing your lungs for that place. You will fall in love with that place. Each corner of Delhi speaks different, and it shows you different and teaches you different. Sometime the rickshaw Wala, sometime the migrant workers, sometimes the chowkidar, or sometime the hardworking students. Each face will have a different story.¡±


    We reached the airport after a three-hour journey, and my Amma woke up by then. My father was parking the car. My mother was tired and I can clearly see she wants to sleep more but somewhere I felt that the sleepiness is hiding her sadness. When my papa took out the luggage, I can feel my heart on the throat. I could not talk, nor I was looking into their eyes. We started to walk to the terminal gate. My papa said ¡°if u feel you can¡¯t be anymore strong, don¡¯t think twice, come back home¡±.


    When I heard his words, my eyes couldn¡¯t stop holding the tears back. I started to cry. I hugged both of them, gave them kisses, and walked straight to the gate. When I passed the security guard, I know that I will miss my parents a lot, but I wanted to go because that¡¯s life and you can¡¯t be always under your parent¡¯s wings. You must fly away from them to discover your own destiny.

 CHAPTER 3 - LSR

    <u>LSR</u>


    Days passed, months passed, and just like that, my second year of college got over. Well, my second year of college was not that interesting. My college is ranked top among the other University of Delhi colleges. It¡¯s a girls-only college and was called Lady Shri Ram College. For short, we call LSR. The campus was so pretty, each corner of the campus was so beautiful and well-maintained. The classes were boring for me. I never paid much attention to my classes. My major was Economics, but I was so interested in Journalism that I chose it as my minor. The college required students to leave the hostel after the one year of stay. I didn¡¯t make many friends from the hostel or from my department. As Papa told I even couldn¡¯t explore Delhi. Leave Delhi. I couldn¡¯t even explore the market behind our college. It''s not because I didn¡¯t have anyone to accompany me, it''s just I never felt like it.


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    Our second-year exams were over. We didn¡¯t get many holidays, and they asked us to shift as soon as possible to make room for the new incoming students. In Delhi, PG and flat hunts are so difficult that I started to doubt my decision to do college here. Above all, my Hindi language skills were very poor. One day when I went to a cafe, I met a girl. I recognized her face and knew that she was from the college hostel and asked her whether she had any known accommodation for students and she gave me some information about the same. And then I finalized one hostel just 15 minutes from my college and I found the rent pretty good. The hostel was located beside a park, having a long open balcony it was owned by two old couples and they used to live along with us. I fell in love the moment I saw the accommodation and booked it for my next one year in college that is my final year. And from here, my life was going to take a different turn.

 CHAPTER 4 - HOME

    CHAPTER 4


    <u> HOME</u>


    It was a sunny day; I was dragging my luggage along the blocks of Amar colony to reach the block where I was living. When I found the small pink building where I will have to spend my rest of the days in Delhi, I prayed to God to make this place a second home for me and that¡¯s what exactly happened.


    Students from LSR mostly occupied it. They were second years, just like me, but from different departments. I took a double sharing room. It was a pretty big room with enormous windows facing the balcony and the park. Even though it was double sharing, the other bed was vacant, and I was happy because I got the entire room by myself. The owner of the hostel was an aunty named Jaya and her husband Prabhakar and they were two old couples and they lived with us on the same floor. Prabhakar uncle always used to work, so mostly he will be out of town. So, Jaya aunty used to be there to keep an eye on all of us and the hostel. Jaya aunty is very kind and sweet that I never felt any discomfort living there. Three other girls were staying there was Isha, Jenya and Praba. Even though I wasn''t close to them at the beginning, everything started to change after two months. We became like a family. The hostel was like a home for us. Anyone from outside they will feel like there is a granny there living along with her granddaughters. I never went to college most of the days I used to be in hostel doing self-study. The hostel differed from other hostels or student accommodations nearby. Jaya aunty never put an advertisement for this hostel. Maybe that¡¯s why only fewer students used to come here for living and I feel like this made the place a home rather than any building.


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    We four used to cook together, party together and used to talk for hours without getting bored. They would frequently prepare North Indian dishes for me, and with each passing day, my affection for North Indian cuisine grew. Time flew so fast that I didn¡¯t even realize how the four months went by. Like my papa said, I was more in love with Delhi. The winters of Delhi made me shop my winters clothes for the first time in my life. In my hometown, I never experienced winter. The hot ¡®gajar halwa¡¯ became my everyday snacks. But somewhere in between all of this I do missed my home where the streets and houses will be decorated with Christmas stars and light but I was waiting for the new year to come to experience the new fresh turns of life.

 CHAPTER 5 - NEW YEAR EVE IS HERE

    CHAPTER 5


    <u>NEW YEAR EVE IS HERE</u>


    It is 31 December 2023 today. I came after my last exams and I was lying on my bed. My phone was ringing, and it was my Amma. I picked up, and she was silent


    I asked ¡°Amma, are you there? Hello¡±.


    She gave a sigh and replied, ¡°why can¡¯t you come home tonight, anyway? Your exams are over and you got four days holidays before the new semester starts.¡±


    ¡°Amma, I know, but the flight tickets are so expensive, and also, after four days, I have to be back at college. At least this semester, I want full attendance.¡±


    She laughed and said, ¡°after every semester you are keeping the same promise. Which later on became broken.¡±


    ¡± at least this time I will follow it, it¡¯s a new year resolution.¡±


    ¡°Let¡¯s see, anyway. Happy New Year, and take care. Bye, and love you.¡±


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    Bye Amma, convey my wishes to papa too, love you.¡±


    Jenya and Praba were having their last exam the next day. This is the only thing I didn¡¯t like about my university that is keeping exams on new year. So, they were preparing so I couldn¡¯t spend the new year with them. Isha went to her home yesterday because her exams got over early. I took a bath, had my dinner and was waiting for the clock to strike 12.00. suddenly Jenya came to my room and gave me some grapes and asked me to have this before the clock strike 12. I felt a bit puzzled and turned to her with a curious expression, gently asking,


    ¡°What, for?¡¯¡¯


    She smiled and said, ¡°google yourself since I don¡¯t have time to explain to you. We can¡¯t talk now. I have exams tomorrow.¡±


    This was some kind of pact between us. We promised not to talk about anything during exam days to avoid long conversations. Our talks never end so do the syllabus.


    Before leaving, she reminded me to have the grapes under the table.


    I took my phone and searched about the grapes tradition and came to know that it was done in Spain during New Year¡¯s Eve to bring good luck for the upcoming year. When the clock was about to be struck, I had those grapes under the table. I felt like I was doing foolish stuff, but somewhere I wanted a good year for me, somewhere I wanted good luck to come for me. But I wanted to get what I was meant to be given even if it¡¯s a bad or good luck. And what I was not going to know was that this was the wonderful magical years I would ever have in my life and the story of him is about to unfold.

 CHAPTER 6 - NEW BEGINNING

    CHAPTER 6


    <u>NEW BEGINNING</u>


    Praba, Jenya came back after the exam, and I wished them Happy New Year. we talked for some time and cooked biryani for dinner. We were waiting for Isha to come back from home. She said that she will be back by January 6 and we were so excited because the next day of her arrival was her birthday. We were excited for one more other reason being going to India Gate for a birthday picnic on 7 January.


    Isha came back, and we threw a great birthday bash and we didn¡¯t have class on seventh since it was Saturday. At evening we went to India Gate fully dressed up to celebrate and have more fun. We captured some amazing photos and enjoyed chatting about a variety of topics.


    Praba excitedly suggested, ¡°How about we have some fun with a game of truth or dare?¡±.


    I was reluctant at first because I knew they will give some tough dare and since we were in public. I was not ready to embarrass myself in front of the entire crowd.


    But who can resist a game of truth or dare? We kicked things off by spinning a Coke bottle, and guess what? It ended up pointing right at me and Isha! Deep down, I just had this feeling that she was going to choose a dare.


    She smiled and said, ¡°How about I give you a fun dare? I dare you to prank call someone!¡±


    In that instant, I could feel my heart racing. Uncommon emotions began to wash over me. It felt like the start of something new. I gazed directly at her and said,


    ¡°No, I can¡¯t do that¡±


    Isha said, ¡°don¡¯t be silly, there is no dare without being daring¡±.


    Praba asked,¡± but, whom we will prank?¡±


    Isha replied we will prank someone who is on our contact list and let¡¯s not prank any strange numbers. Maybe what if it can cause any other issue?¡¯¡¯


    Jenya replied by saying, ¡°I got a number that number belongs to my school friend¡¯s distant friend. He won¡¯t create any issue; he will take it as a joke.¡±


    I asked, ¡°what¡¯s his name?¡±


    The three of them burst into laughter and playfully teased me, saying, ¡°Look, someone is eager to learn his name! And just look at that sweet blushed face¡ªher cheeks are as red as ripe tomatoes!¡±


    The one feature I can¡¯t conceal is my round cheeks, which turn as red as tomatoes when I feel shy or joyful. I let out a sigh, glanced down, and asked, ¡°How should I refer to him, then?¡±


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    ¡°Zayn, his name is Zayn Arora¡±.


    My eyebrows shot up, and I felt a little flutter in my stomach. I wondered why I was experiencing this; it was just a name, and I had never seen or heard of this person before, unlike the countless boys¡¯ names I had heard without feeling anything. I glanced at them and inquired, ¡°So, what should I actually say to him?¡±


    Praba told ¡°we are not going to tell you the whole dialogues it¡¯s just simple you are confessing your feelings towards him. You yourself have to figure out how to confess.¡±


    I asked Jenya, ¡°Could you please share a picture of him? It would really help me picture who he is!¡±


    She replied I used to follow him on Instagram but I unfollowed him long back, but yeah, he is tall and will be a complete match for you¡±.


    Isha and Praba laughed loudly. I grabbed my phone and began entering his number, making sure with each digit I typed that this wouldn¡¯t result in any police involvement or anything similar.


    Before hitting the call button, I glanced at the three of them. They were supporting me and hoping for my success. My heart raced. I hit the call button but immediately ended the call after a second. Isha patted me on the shoulder, took the phone, and redialled. He answered the call right away and said,


    ¡®¡¯Hello¡±.


    I felt like the entire universe have come to a halt. I felt like the entire crowd in the India Gate lawns faded, the sound of the vehicle honks inaudible. Even I was not knowing what I was going through. I reminded myself to be calm and be confident.


    ¡°Hello, is it Zayn?¡±.


    ¡°Yeah, it¡¯s Zayn speaking. Can I know whom I am speaking to?¡¯¡¯


    In that instant, I didn¡¯t want to reveal my true name because I felt afraid, and even more importantly, it was just a prank call, not a genuine confession. I told him


    ¡°My name is Avanthika¡±.


    ¡°Okay, then Avanthika, how can I help you?¡±


    ¡°Just want to tell you, Zayn that I got a crush on you and you look really handsome and I wanted to share this for a long time but couldn¡¯t.¡¯¡¯


    There was a moment of silence, and my throat started to dry up. I started to exchange glances continuously with my friends. They were whispering to be calm and don¡¯t mess it up.


    I noticed Zayn clearing his throat, ready to talk, and I could hear him chuckling as he said, ¡°Avanthika, I can¡¯t grasp your emotions since we¡¯re conversing in English. Could you please speak in Hindi so I can truly feel the depth of your words?¡±


    I glanced at my friends, completely baffled about how to respond. Out of nowhere, a sense of confidence began to emerge, and I finally said,


    ¡®¡¯You know, I¡¯m actually not from Delhi, and my Hindi skills aren¡¯t the best. But guess what? I¡¯ve downloaded the Duolingo app just for you, so I can learn Hindi and chat with you better!


    My friends smiled at me, and Jenya even gave me a little silent cheer. I chuckled after sharing those words, but he burst into an infectious laugh. Then he asked,


    ¡°Oh, that¡¯s interesting! Can you share where you first saw me and felt that spark?¡±


    I turned to Jenya, hoping for some insight, but she wasn¡¯t sure which college he had gotten into or where he might be living now. Although Jenya had his number a while back, they never really connected as friends. She started giving me some signals, but I couldn¡¯t quite read them. I took a deep breath and gently said,


    ¡°See Zayn, I felt a crush on you, that¡¯s why I thought of saying this to you and thank you for hearing. Bye¡±.


    ¡°Please don¡¯t hang up, just hear me out.¡± Zayn urged.


    I ended the call and glanced at the three of them, and even though I felt a little scared, deep down, I couldn¡¯t help but feel a sense of happiness. These are the wild memories we¡¯ll cherish forever in our lives, and they have the potential to become core memories. When we grow older and reflect on the past, we might take pride in our accomplishments, whether they¡¯re from our careers, college, school, or just life. But beyond those achievements, what truly matters are these irreplaceable memories, and I¡¯m eager to create my own too¡­