《Spoiled! [Spirit Beast Slice of Life Grimdark Cozy Isekai]》 Spoilers but not *** This rant will continue to grow. This is not a "See Spot run. Run, Spot, run. Spot likes to run. Spot runs everywhere." book series. This is a "what the dog doing?" MC watches a dog sprinting, eyes wide and tongue lolling. Does no one else see this? "Hmm," someone follows MCs line of sight and sees the dog disappear down the street. "Oh, that''s Spot. That dog has way too much energy." series. Same thing. Things will happen. You''re reading what is happening not being told what to think or feel. You get to decide that for yourself. You want to encourage spot? Go for it. You don''t give a fuck about spot? Cool. There will be cultivation and progression clich¨¦s. MC does not know them. If you don''t know them you will miss them. If you do know them, keep an eye out for "easter eggs". MC learns about the shiz later. And sometimes forgets. Because there is a lot~. *** First off: First book is stubbed. Out of over 400 pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! (And tables to the best I could manage) only, maybe 3-4 chapters are on RR. But, gasp!, it says 15 chapters! Out of over 400 pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! Maybe 3-4 chapters are on RR. (Let''s say 3-7. For breathing room purposes.) The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" stuff is. And those chapters are marked B2. For Book 2. And on the fiction page they should have a nifty little section with a different cover. That''s what some of those weird cover chapters with images were about. Because: The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" For those of you who got it the first time, this is for the people in the front who tuned out then went "hey! No one acts like MC!" Correct. Book 2 is more cultivation and progression than litrpg. But this is a series. These things come and go and there''s a ranking system. An actual ranking system within the system and depending on what you rank in, or with whom, you will have access to nifty stuff. Being the emperor''s friend is much better than owning your own house. Because it''s the emperor of the empire versus a piece of property somewhere within said empire. -.- We good? Cool. If not? I don''t know what to tell you. I''m trying not to Chronicles of Riddick you. The second version. I''m all over the first one where you get to figure out the story yourself, not the extended versions where they have random chick in fur bikini tell you everything up front and keep repeating it over and over ruining every twist and turn. And then recapping to make sure you''re not enjoying yourself. ALL the spoilers. But not really, because these parts are already published. For the entire fookin'' published series. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) Posting this as a separate comment because it''s not the first time I answered this, but people keep deleting their comments after I explain. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) I swear some of the reviews were written to help explain the things so people wouldn''t be confused. And then there''s another comment! That mysteriously disappears, ''cause fack all the time I spend answering and anyone else who might have the same question. And gonna make this a separate chapter, I suppose. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) /Synopsis/Recap Literally the leader of the empire goes, oh neat, there''s another god tier person here. Then wtf is this because he doesn''t understand wtf Kisandera is doing grooming and making silk and eating garbage. MC is ignorant of the way things work. Other people are taking advantage of that. Or they think it''s just some OP treasure/bot with nonsensical, poorly programmed reactions. I tried to make this clear without just saying it based on how other people aren''t taking MC serious despite all the weird shit they can do. Their reactions and responses verbal and non-verbal. Fail, I guess. I even put it in the book description... WTF. Their attacks and the things they use the most keep updating and evolving. They keep unlocking new shit. They just don''t get personalized notifications or know how to access the notification system, and then they lost permission to do it at will. I rambled about this. In book. Without the exact phrasing because MC doesn''t know the shiz exists. You as the reader might, the other characters hint that they do, MC doesn''t. MC is literally that one person who plays a game, says it''s garbage, doesn''t know what they''re doing, refuses to check the wiki because all the stuff should be in game already, lucks into some amazing bullshit, then you find out later they didn''t know they could use a backpack. Or that there''s a skill list. Or waypoints. Or a reputation shop. Or any of the things that make the game playable. Hell. A crafting interface. MODESTY keeps telling them how much OP dragonshit they keep doing, tries to get over the envy, then tries to explain to Kisandera that there''s a lot of stuff they need to pay attention to that they''re not even looking at. There''s a tutorial. That''s how everyone else knows this basic shit. Kisandera keeps timing out of it by SLEEPING while they cycle. The closed door cultivation is a thing. The gaining insight while meditating is a thing. Sometimes they stumble on new insights while rambling in their head, but there''s a fully interactive world the triplets are getting access to and learning from that Kisandera is managing to avoid. The whole "we can see it when you see it" then kIsandera going wow, how are they learning all this shit? Then napping some more. Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author. This is why the system is trolling them. It is personal. At one point in time they learned how to silence the notifications or set them to important only. Then ignored them. On purpose. And called them annoying. Then started moping ''cause they didn''t know how to get them back. They didn''t mute them. They got turned off. They have to turn them back on again. They''ve barely got an understanding of how permissions work. The miasma thing is a character alteration item with a 90% chance to pull a "wish granted". It''s why people avoid the shit out of it. You want radiant skin? Congratulations, you''re radioactive. When they (Kisandera) keep mutating it''s because their idle thoughts of "I want to be able to do this turn" into "congrats, you''ve unlocked". There''s a 10% chance you''ll get what you want, and a 1% chance you''ll get it the way you want it. Yes, this is a reference to loot boxes and shitty RNG when they lie about the chances of you getting a super rare item. Back to MC doing something they''ve been doing and it suddenly changes. That''s them unlocking a new version of the skill. And it takes them by surprise because they can''t access notifications. Sometimes they remember, most of the time they just think it''s a hiccup. Miasma doesn''t change skills, it only changes appearance. Dude wants tiger hands. Chance he''ll just grow harder nails, chance he''ll get human hands that look like tiger paws but aren''t, chance his hands will get stronger and look tiger-y and be tiger-y, chance he''ll actually get anthro tiger hands that are super awesome. Then he''ll have access to developing tiger claw attacks, doesn''t just give them. Miasma doesn''t give him access to the skills. Having the claws and learning to use them will. What else to rant about? MC loses access to their logs but other people can still access them. The logs are there. Will always be there. Whether or not the Kisandera loses permission to go to them doesn''t affect other people''s permissions to access them. Back to trolly system thing. There is the option to just know what''s in the logs versus searching for lines, or looking at spreadsheets, what? you can change view? even into lists?, but there''s also the option to integrate the logs into memory. MC does this almost instinctively, bug instinct hack, with things they eat, hence gaining rip off spider abilities or dragon scale. MC could produce silk already, MC is a moth thing with hair and scales, eating them didn''t unlock the skill so much as having the tools available already and learning a new way to use them. So could eat dragon, no scales? no dragon scale skills. Want breathe fire? No fire essence? no breathe fire for you! MC started off with a spatial realm that they thought was just a spatial storage/bank, the box inventory interface was a display of what was in the space not the space itself. When they went into the outer space starry galaxy area and built a storage facility, that was them actually building into the spatial realm. Spatial realm is like the in game housing system where you take a portal to a private area you can customize. To a point. Kisandera uses essence and "materials" from things they''ve eaten. They can also make shit if they have the right materials for it. They can convert essence into materials. They can''t make things without getting a certain amount of it and knowing what it is. So no meteor/star metal weapons just because. Funny thing is the tutorial had some bootleg copies to impress students with enough in all the tools gathered to actually make a nugget of star metal to start actually producing it but nobody knows that yet XD. Those flying black weapons that kisandera stole weren''t just steel. They were just mostly steel. Which isn''t all steel. Exam spoilers!! Inside the exam where there was a field of flowers that come from different places and have different elements and if you get too close or interact directly with them you get affected by them are gathering points for all the loot of all the students that died. The blue crystal kisandera found is concentrated Qi. Crystalized Qi. What from the people who dead and the plants. Cycles Qi in the area helping it be the psychotic mishmash it is without turning into a miasma dense hellscape. They find several jade stones. Storage stones, that are all the jade storages that were dumped during the exam. People with permission, instructors sent to retrieve so and so''s storage because their clan/family paid for it to be returned, can break off pieces of it with storage intact. Kisandera wasn''t supposed to be able to see the treasure piles and ends up just stealing them which increased their rank ''cause obviously they''re not common to be able to pull that shit off. Yes, this will piss off a lot of people who will try to subtly make things worst for Kisandera. Kisandera used a waypoint they didn''t know about. The shortcut in the trap house? That''s a maintenance tunnel to help reset the traps. Their OP void accessing permissions let them access spatial shit. Period. They have a built in master key/transport pass. Bug them knows this. They them do not. Bug them is a fookin'' insect and unable to communicate other than to do or not do. Kisandera is an unobservant, non-animal friendly person who just goes, oh, ew, why''d I do that? So, moving on... This is a slice of life series. A long running, from birth to finish, (Godhood? You really think so?), story about a person who was reborn into a place they have no concept of. As far as everyone else in the world is concerned their lack of knowledge, or very specific limited knowledge, makes them a talking treasure. Not even an NPC. A chatty tool. The other characters aren''t NPCs. The NPCs are the one-offs stuck in a loop. You will notice them if you''re looking for them. They don''t do much, are highly specialized, and they don''t do much else. It''s easy to know where they''ll be and what they''ll be doing. Some people will try to live that NPC life, merchants and cozy lovers, but then they get home and take the costume off. Am I going to tell you who they are? Nope. Can you guess? If you want. Will you be right? Sometimes. A routine doesn''t equal a script. There''s a difference. Questions? Ask away. Just... Don''t delete the comment after I answer because that gets rid of the answer, too. Other people might be stuck on the same question. Imagine a world without wikis and FAQs. And you will be the MC. Repeated for your enjoyment. AmazonKU or The Spoiled Series Life TL;DR Section: ?? Snarky MC that thinks like a comment section, refuses to read, and didn''t play the tutorial, trapped in someone else''s dream life with absolutely no interest in playing along, much less being nice about it ?? When relationships aren''t will they won''t they but people trying not to kill each other because it''s polite. ?? Author enjoys solo-playing Wurm (Online/Unlimited) **unmodded**, watching extras in movies for that one who''s EXTRA, and always wonders what happened in those two years where MC went from ignorant to badass. You have been warned. Nice people left reviews. Read them for a heads up. Affiliate/Amazon links for my shiz when I remember. I only get paid when someone buys MY books or subscribes on Patreon. I am broke but I like reading my stories XD Series on Amazon and AmazonKU Kindle Unlimited 10 Year Deal Offer ??The Spoiled Master Wanted A Pet Spoiled Book I Stubbed on RR for AmazonKU First few chapters on RR Random nonsense on Patreon Mostly art and ramblings, will be added to over time Story of a clueless slacker waking up in another world as a giant grub with a ridiculous name and a list of tasks no one told them. All they want is to be left alone, but there''s work to do and they''ve been volun-told to do it but not how it''s done. Being a rejected Gift to a high ranking family is hard. -I went to take a nap on my 15 minute break and when I woke up I was being manhandled into a cage! -Now I''m a pet for some spoiled brat in a world where magic is real. -"Pet", your face! Let me out!- ??The Spoiled Class Pet Spoiled Book II Stubbed; AmazonKU Kis-- Sandy has been recognized by the Emperor himself and released into the care of Thousand Valleys to continue their service to the Empire. Now that they''re recognized as an asset, not something to be put down, with a cohort of advisors rubbing elbows with the elite and a clear understanding of what''s expected of them, why the fuck do they have to go to school? "Nah, I''m just supposed to eat and spin silk. This has been well-established." ??The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour Spoiled Book III Available for purchase on Amazon; Will be stubbed October and moved to AmazonKU upon Book IV publishing to AmazonKU; Kisandera finally makes it into Seven Moons. Now what? They can''t turn to the triplets, Madame Director is an unknown, and what if Modesty isn''t as kind as they''d thought? Shit... -I didn''t want to get into this shitty ass school and now I have to do more work for another job I didn''t sign up for? Fuck off, where''s the food? This''ll do. I''m gonna go take a nap...- ??The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour II Renamed The Entitled Imperial Treasure Spoiled Book IV Available for purchase on Amazon; Will be scheduled in October on RR after Book III goes to AmazonKU; After Book IV is finished posting on RR and up for a few weeks in its entirety it''ll be taken down and posted on to AmazonKU after a few weeks; Hopefully Book V will begin posting at that time Kisandera continues their imperially decreed quest to "Get Gud", but runs into a few snags once they make it to their first town. -How are you going to teach me when you don''t even know how the world works?! You can''t cycle in your sleep? You can''t use elemental essence before entering Qi stage? You can''t manipulate Qi without doing the tutorial? Wait, there''s a tutorial?!- End of TL;DR section
The Spoiled Master Wanted A Pet Book One, Spoiled Book I This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience. What to expect: ?? Non pornographic adult children''s book Lots of swearing and rude remarks ?? MC that is no longer human or humanoid. Reborn as a bug not human gasp? ?? No Harem or sex. Pet will not be having babies in any standard fashion or go through the motions thereof. Will also not be observing other people making babies or making harems This isn''t that kind of "technically..." story Technically there''s all kinds of drama in the background and crazy relationship dynamics ?? Daily life story told from MC perspective and they know nothing about "cultivation" stories. TL;DR: Tedious bullshit with shenanigans sprinkled in Slow buildup with information in MCs observations or the background without it being force fed. They don''t have god mode, why should you, ya creepy mind reading tossers!? **Time jumps from MC being asleep or tuning out for long periods of time. This is not a fast story. Do not rate it as such. Literally tagged "slice of life" instead of "tedious as balls." If this summary offends you, whoo boy! RUN ? (cue music) ? ?? Lots of action-based mutations/skill-development MCs cultivation is on rails but they don''t remember going to the train station. Nudge nudge, wink wink, spoilers to some bullshit you might piece together before the grand reveal ? They woke up like this ? Wait, who dat? ?? A troll-y system that takes everything the MC hates and makes it their problem. Example: Doesn''t like reading outside of specific genres for entertainment purposes? If MC wishes to read about any changes implemented they can find them in their logs which record everything. Everything. (Series Spoiler: The system is watching and it is personal)
The Spoiled Class Pet Book Two, Spoiled II What to Expect: ?? Spoiler! Slice of life GameLit. More slice of life than GameLit and notifications got turned off. Spoiler: Rankings and position affect what you have access to? Gasp! Not everyone is super elite god mode and MC doesn''t get special treatment because they''re not special? Eek! Spoilers! Oh nos! ?? MC still trying to figure out things people assume they know based on how OP they are Lots more of "you can''t do that" to "how the fuck did I do it then?" And, yes, MC will then repeatedly do the impossible thing in sequence just to prove they can While making eye contact ''Cause obviously the naysayer is wrong ?? Still no MC smex! \o/ Not sure how to make this more clear THERE IS NO HANKY PANKY! ?? More people who can''t have nice things ''Cause snacks or assholes and snacking on assholes non-sexually ?? More Sandy Soap Opera Dramatic pose: "You''re not the father!"
The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour Book Three, Spoiled III Spoilers: ??MC that goes from strong to not worth thinking about. Spoiler: New zipcode, who dis? What~? There''s a whole world of magic and rules change? No~... ??More references to mythology from the orient. In usual Kissy doesn''t know but finds out later fashion And not just Japan? But Asia? What? Japan isn''t all of Asia? ??More foods. Spoiler: [Big Four go here] Just one course. There''s several with different mains. ??Screens and notifications. Spoiler: When Sandy ranks up. Nudge nudge, wink wink. Systems with permissions ? And they''re a slacker~ ? . Prepare for spam! Grab a snack. ??More Imperial shenanigans. Spoiler: Tailors go whee? ??Zombies. (Tired of all the spoilers?)
The Entitled Imperial Treasure Book Four, Spoiled IV Spoilers! ?? Still no MC smex! o/ If you''re still waiting I would advise against holding your breath Although stronger, healthier, happier Sandy might think about settling down someday, but to what? ?? New Zipcode! MC goes from world MC, to Pet, to side character, to roving treasure to cheese events ("How are you so useless and so ungodly powerful?" Literal quote from someone interacting with Sandy) Back to that whole there''s rankings you have to do shit to maintain them (In a world of cultivation and progression? Gasp!) And MC doesn''t give a fuck about what the world wants They didn''t volunteer for this shit although that over there looks interesting... ?? More Sandy Family Soap Opera along the lines of "Save the Children!" Not a good parent? Won''t make you a good aunt or uncle. Not convinced? Just watch. -.- ?? Sandy learns more stuff Not about combat. About banking. Fuck fighting. And horticulture. ?? There''s a gun! Wait, what?
?? Final product of Spoiled! series on Amazon under GlytchedChiq with heavy edits and reformatting. Book experience versus rough edits and serial online format. ?? Cover(s) made with deepai.org image(s) and Gimp Skill development IRL? ?? Translations not approved. Or repostings. I''m making this shit for entertainment, but I''d like to get paid for my work, fuckers. I''m getting started, not established, and Amazon only touched my stuff after I gave exclusive publishing rights. Have I self-published elsewhere? Yes. Did anyone care? No. Did I tell anyone? Yes. Where''d that stuff go? My Patreon. Do you even know the amount of spreadsheets I have to make? I don''t know what I''m doing, but I try. When a formula works across documents it''s so satisfying, innit? Do you realize that if I fail to update the right number or my ylsdexia kicks in how far back I have to go to fix this shit? ?? Patreon finished Spoiled IV, full access $2.50 a month with Reader, trying to crank out a book a month, not necessarily just this series, currently working on Magical Girl Maggie, the "use your words" wordy, poor Half Low Alf, quarter Hobgoblin, quarter Lumeran who learned magic is real in time to see someone get disemboweled. Spoilers question mark? Chapter One Less than an hour ago I was checking my bank account balance trying to decide if I wanted to put more money into savings or buy myself a nice meal. Less than an hour ago I¡¯d finally managed to power through to my break so I could get a quick power nap in. Less than an hour ago I was looking forward to the end of my shift so that I could continue crafting armours in ***** Online. Less than an hour ago I¡¯d still been human. Now I¡¯m a giant grub trapped in a cage with some brat poking at me! I still haven¡¯t figured out how to walk, everyone dresses funny, I¡¯m starving and I¡¯m going to be put down because I¡¯m going to take this brat¡¯s finger if he pokes me one more time. I sigh as the kid pokes his smelly finger through the bars again. I can¡¯t even move away much less try to bite him. How¡¯d I get here? What is this? I try to grunt in irritation and my whole body ripples, my many legs wriggling rapidly and I¡¯m not sure where to start on figuring out why. I suppose it doesn¡¯t really matter... Bugs don¡¯t last very long, and, judging by my size, I¡¯m at least the size of a newborn kitten or puppy. At most I¡¯ve got a few months. A year, tops. What kind of bug grows this big? Do I have a molting phase or am I going to be a giant soft-bodied grub until I die? The kid pokes me again and I roll over with a sigh. I¡¯d gone to sleep, eyes slamming shut I was so tired, and I woke up to dirty hands pulling me out of a hole and shoving me into a cage. They hadn¡¯t even bothered to cover the cage before they packed me on a cart with other random disgusting nightmares. It took me embarrassingly long to figure out that I wasn¡¯t dreaming and I was a nightmarishly large pulsating grub. I¡¯m still tired so I opt to ignore the brat and try to take a nap. Then my stomach pinches. I skipped breakfast and it was too early for lunch. I¡¯d planned to grab something on the way back to my station but then I¡¯d wound up here. Ugh¡­ Something smells good¡­ I roll back over as the texture of the object on my skin changes to something thinner and more flexible. A flower? Claws on the end of my legs latch on to the petals of the flower, my head coming forward as I begin nibbling. Delicious! [System Unlocked] The author''s tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. I pause briefly in confusion before continuing to munch on the sweet tender flower. The fragrance is nothing like anything that would make me think of food when I was human, but it sings to me now the same way a bacon double cheeseburger had called to me when I¡¯d treat myself. And it¡¯s so satisfying. Salad has never tasted this good. [Registration Complete] [Name: Kissy Kissy] [Greater Wimble Grub Lv.1] [Master: Golden Blade God] Kissy Kissy, who? Master, my ass! Golden Blade God? See what kind of god you are when I poop on you! After I finish this I¡¯m gonna make a mess you have to clean up! Who¡¯s the master, now? [New Skill Gained] [Iron Stomach(Tier 1)] [New Skill Gained] [Moon Flower Thread(Tier 3)] [Moon Flower Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 100/175] [Moon Flower Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Level Up] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier1)] [Current Karma: 200/525] [Moon Flower Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 300/525] I continue nomming, eating the petals one at a time even though I was full three petals in and there have to be hundred more on this over-sized Dandelion. Only ten petals in and I have to stop. It¡¯s time. Time for my revenge! There¡¯s a tightening lower down my strange new body and the little ¡°master¡± and his attendants cheer in relief before he grabs a stick and races over. What¡¯s he going to do with that? I lightly panic before I feel a slight tug. Curling up I try to push as hard as I can before I notice that I¡¯m not pooping. I¡¯m producing silk. Oh, no. I¡¯m a giant silkworm? Don¡¯t they lead golden lives until they molt and then they die quick, ignominious deaths? What did I do to deserve this fate? I can¡¯t even cry. [Moon Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Level Up] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier 2)] [Current Karma: 1200/1750] I go from horrified, to sad, to resigned to impressed. Three sticks later and I¡¯m still producing thread. What is this flower that it fills me up so quickly and promotes such excellent silk production? And, while I¡¯m not an expert, this silk does look very nice. It has a pale, silvery sheen to it and hasn¡¯t broken once. Surely part of that is me instead of the flower. [Moon Silk Produced: 10 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Level Up] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier 3)] [Current Karma: 3000/3675] Now what¡¯s going on with all these random words? I¡¯ve tried looking around but the voice I hear doesn¡¯t seem to match up with any of the people speaking. I¡¯ve eaten 10 Moon Flower Petals but there¡¯s still hundreds of the pale silky morsels to go. I¡¯ve produced 10 yd of Moon Silk and I¡¯m exhausted. I¡¯ve got a Realm thingy and a Karma¡­ rating? Bar? I¡¯ve got stuff I don¡¯t understand. Who do I need to talk to to figure it out? Bah, who cares. I¡¯m gonna take a well earned nap and figure out the rest when I wake up. Not like I¡¯m going anywhere. I roll over, curl up, and go to sleep with that little brat poking at me with an unfinished stick covered in silk. Chapter Two [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2850/3675] If I could cry, I would. [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2800/3675] I''m lying curled on my side in warm sunlight. Directly in warm sunlight. I can feel my skin drying out and hardening. It''s too warm. If I could cry, I would, but, since I can''t, I just ignore the brat who keeps trying to make me eat again. [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2750/3675] My voracious appetite from before is gone. How long have I slept? It was bright then and it''s bright now, but I''m still in this cage and now we''re outside and I''m going to die. [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2700/3675] I''d fallen asleep in cool darkness inside a building with many openings filled with leaves and branches. Passed the comforting shadows was a blinding brightness or maybe it was just blinding in comparison. But it couldn''t reach me where we were. Why are we out here now? Why am I being punished? [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2650/3675] Was the karma thingy I was getting negative karma? Am I being punished for my greed? I hadn''t eaten in so long and the tender petals were so sweet and satisfying... How was I supposed to know, no one told me anything! I still don''t understand. But I got more karma for producing silk. Was I not supposed to? How much karma is this brat getting feeding me and taking my silk? I worked hard and now I''m going to be a baked, dry husk. Is this the reward for all of my hard work? [-50 Karma] [Clarity Loss] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier 3)] [Current Karma: 2600/2625] [New Skill Gained] [Resonating Cry] My back splits and I scream. The sound I make is ungodly. It sounds horrifying to me, a sound like nails on a chalkboard. The sound is upsetting to me but apparently very painful to the brat. He screams, not nearly as impressive, and covers his ears, falling to the ground. [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 2620/2625] [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2570/2625] [New Skill Unlocked] [Entomb] I''m impressed. Whatever else this body lacks I have an impressive set of lungs. I don''t have to pause for air, my throat isn''t getting sore, and I haven''t lost pitch. Very impressive. [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 2590/2625] [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2540/2625] A group of people in matching clothing rush into the room. Attendants or guards? Whether because of my cries or the brat''s, I can''t tell. They may kill me but now I can fight! Let them suffer my wrath! Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit. [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 2560/2625] [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2510/2625] They''re ignoring me. They''re not suffering at all! But the brat still is! I will have my revengeance! They surround the boy, one of them coming over to me and looking around. I have no off switch! [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2460/2625] Why am I not? Getting karma anymore? Three of the uniformed people race away, two carrying the boy upright while a third has their hands clapped over the child''s ears. Did they just form a human throne for that brat? Are they blocking me out? With their hands? What kind of attack can be stopped by covering your ears?! I demand justice! [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2410/2625] I keep screaming, just in case. Maybe they won''t get far enough away and I''ll get one last shot in. Three more people rush in, two men not in matching uniforms and a woman wearing clothing that looks suspiciously like what I pooped out before... I didn''t produce enough silk for a whole outfit, did I? [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2360/2625] Bah! Whoever these people are they''re immune to my cries of pain. Have they no hearts? Have they no souls? Whatever. I don''t have to stop and the screams aren''t affecting me and it''s something to do besides lying around. [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2310/2625] I''m not sure what language they''re speaking but I have no idea what they''re saying. The woman is casually ordering everyone around in a calm voice, directing them with a silk scarf tucked into a ring on her right hand. They can hear her over me? Unfair. Someone races into the surrounding plants and I no longer see them. What is this vision? It''s like my world is only 20 ft. [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2260/2625] I keep screaming and the only response this garners is for the woman to stomp her foot. She''s already sent everyone else off, scattering them to the four corners. Oh, ho. Now we have a new game! Do I stop screaming or will she lose patience with my screams? If I''m a bug, am I breathing through holes along my body? What kind of control do I have to be able to breathe and scream so easily? Same control that lets me poop out 10 yd of silk! I cannot fail! [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2210/2625] One of the men comes back and bows to the woman, holding out what looks like a small candy tin with both hands, head lowered even after she removes the item from his hands. She opens it and I smell something tasty. Oh... It''s like smelling bacon frying without the greasy feeling! Delicious! [-50 Karma] [Current Karma: 2160/2625] The woman runs her fingers all through what looks like a creamy substance in the jar. Is it really bacon grease? It looks so smooth and clean! How many times did they filter and render that to make it look so silky? I want to move, but I''m afraid of opening my wound further. I won''t stop screaming until I get whatever that is. You won''t trick me into stopping with false promises! What? I stop screaming in shock. I could keep screaming, I''m just surprised when she rubs the cream along my wound. It feels nice. Cool and moist. Much better than the soil I was dug out of. Another person comes back and she takes a flower from him, this one bright blue with some petals coming out like tendrils. I try not to nod off but I''m so sleepy... Oh? I''m not losing karma anymore. Ah! They''re healing me! Another person comes in with a long broad leaf that they wrap around my dry, warm body and another person comes in with a box of dirt. The woman hands me the giant flower and I sleepily take it, not even remembering that I won''t work after their mistreatment. [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 2260/2625] She sets me on the soil as I sleepily munch on the cooling blue petals. My body responds without any prompting and I quickly bury myself, face barely poking out of the cool damp soil, the flower used as an edible sun shade and I nod off. [Entomb Successful] [Karma Granted: 500] [Clarity Regained] [Current Karma: 2760/3675] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier3)] [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 2910/3675] Chapter Three [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 3060/3675] Ah... Much better. The wound is still on my back and I don''t know how long it will take to heal but the medicine and bandages are doing an excellent job of keeping me in one piece. I''m not taking any damage and my appetite is back although this flower tastes less like melon than the last. [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 3210/3675] That''s it! The last flower tasted faintly like honeydew. This one tastes more like... Cantaloupe? Still tasty, personal preference aside. That voice doesn''t seem to care either way. [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 3360/3675] I freeze, grip tightening on my sunshade and partially eaten petal hanging out of my mouth as I feel them move my new enclosure. Hopefully into the shade. I keep munching. They want me to work, they better take better care of me! Hopefully I managed to teach that brat a lesson. Let''s see him poke me now! [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 3510/3675] Hm? How strange. I''ve eaten more than three of these but they''re not filling me up as much. The voice is completely unfazed by my being hidden in the dirt. Wasn''t I going to take a nap? [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Level Up] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier 4)] [Current Karma: 3660/4900] Maybe I''ll finish this meal first, empty my guts, then be ready for a good long sleep. I wiggle around, stretching, still without pain, and wait. There''s no message about me losing karma. I''m not full yet but maybe my injury is treated well enough to heal properly? [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 3810/4900] Okay, now I''m getting full. One more for the road. Oh. Nevermind, they''ve set me down somewhere. I don''t let go of the flower as someone I can''t see grabs it and tries to take it away. I snatch one more bite before relinquishing my hold, finishing the petal then covering my face. I''m mildly disturbed by the fact that having dirt covering my face isn''t upsetting, but such is a grub''s lot, I suppose. I''m full but I don''t feel like making thread right now. I sigh, not feeling up to a nap either. Don''t want to scream. What to do? Besides recoil when someone clears the dirt away from my face! Get your filthy hands away from my face! I try to cover up again, hiding in the dirt and they dust away the dirt again. Gah! I bury myself and they dig me back out before offering another blue flower petal. I''m not really hungry, and I probably shouldn''t, don''t want to get fat and all. No. Wait. I''m not human anymore. Don''t I need to eat to put on weight before I molt or whatever it was? Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation. I graciously accept the petal. My little hands grasping the petal and I slowly eat it. And what do you know! At the end of my feet I really do have teeny tiny little digits! They''d be cute if they weren''t covered in very tiny barbs. Guess that explains my strong grip. Such is life. [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 3960/4900] I finish the petal and start grooming myself. Hmm. It''s much easier to move suddenly. Or am I just more awake? It would be nice if I was capable of adapting to such a bizarre lifestyle change in such a calm manner but I''m not sure if I''m getting used to it or if it just hasn''t fully registered. Either way it''s nice to know that I don''t scour the flesh off of myself when I clean but these barbs are very good at getting loose any debris and oil. Ha! Eating a meal then licking my fingers clean. How vulgar. Oh? Why not? I accept the new offering, amazed that this flower is so much lighter on the stomach than the other. Or did I just stretch my stomach that much after one meal? I wonder what''s going to happen to the rest of the flowers. I haven''t even begun to make a dent in eating all the petals, but I have thrown off the symmetry by eating the large petals on the edges first. [Sky Blossom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 4110/4900] [New Skill Gained] [Sky Blossom Thread(Tier 3)] [New Skill Gained] [Productive(Tier 3)] Oh? No more room in the tank. All kids out of the pool! I squirm, poking just the very end of my tuckus out of the soil and lightly burying my face. I don''t need to see this. Out comes the thread. There''s a pull? I peek out to see that they were already prepared with another collection stick and they''re expertly winding my silk on it. Bah! [Sky Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 300(+100 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 4410/4900] I try to nod off but it''s too awkward with my back end pushed up towards the heavens. I peek out again and try to see where I am now as they continue collecting my expulsions. I''m in a room. There''s no open windows or arches. Just one window with a shutter on it. There''s a desk with a lamp and some papers, books, and rolled up documents all neatly organized in a small cubby. There''s a bed with one thick looking pillow on what I would consider a standard wooden frame, a rack with clothes hanging on it, and a tank with something that looks like a giant centipede. [Sky Silk Produced: 12 yd] [Karma Granted: 300(+100 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 7710/7875] Do what now? The calm announcement that I''d managed to tune out startles me out of my fear induced staring contest. I look around in confusion, a girl I''d never seen putting what I assume is my last spool of silk into a small lacquered wooden box. I barely manage to catch the light blue with a shimmering silver sheen that is my Sky Silk before she closes the box and leaves, taking the box with her. Who was that? Where''s the brat? Where''d everyone go? More importantly are they really going to leave me in a room alone with that monster with nothing between us but a thin pane of glass? Apparently I really had nodded off and now I''m trapped with a monster! I squeal nervously and quickly bury myself, knowing that it won''t keep me safe but this is the closest thing I''ve got to a blanket and one does not peek out from under the blanket if one does not want monsters to get them. Chapter Four Hmm? I sneak a peek, looking around to see the lamp is off and the room is dark except for a faint glowing red trail in the corner. I gasp and rebury myself. That centipede thing glows? Good to know that no matter how dark it is I''ll be able to see that death coming. Ack! But what is this? Is this a new day or the same day? Every time I''d woken up after being put in the cage it had been bright and there were people waiting with food. Now I''m in the dark, in a box, in a corner with nothing to eat. Where''s everyone, and, more importantly, where''s the food? I sigh and notice that I can make sounds now. Hmm. If only I could shrug. I don''t want to scream, no sense in ringing the dinner bell for the creature in the corner. I just woke up, I could nap but I don''t want to. That leaves eating. So, again, where''s the food? Can I move? I''m wary of reopening the wound on my back but I''m not getting any notifications of my karma score dropping, for what that''s worth. I still don''t even know what that nonsense is about. But I''m also not getting any notifications about gaining Karma or new skills. If I tried to climb out would it fail? I can move my hands to grab, I learned how to roll over, shall we see if baby can do it''s first steps? I slowly wriggle, instinctively knowing how to squirm in order to rise from the grave without actually having to pull myself out of the dirt. Now that I''m on top of the soil and exposed to dry air I mildly regret my decision. A quick squirm forces my back back into the dirt and more wriggling kicks the dirt up on top of me. With nothing but my face exposed I try to casually ignore the shame of my cowardice. [Entomb Successful] [Karma Granted: 500] [Level Up] [New Skill Gained] [Sticky (Tier 3)] [Current Realm: Cloudy(Tier 5)] [Current Karma: 8210/9625] Wait, what? I already had sticky feet! I''d used them to fight for a flower! I lost, but still! Tch! What is this nonsense? I roll over, flinging dirt out of the box. And why am I so itchy?! I grumble and grouse while cleaning myself, scraping along my entire length, not just my face. Slowly realizing that I''m not just combing my body with my hands but also combing my hands with my body I''m shocked to feel clusters of sharp hairs along my body. What''s the point of this? I give up, disgusted, and flop back onto my back before my body flexes and I''m covered. Just like that. [Entomb Successful] [Karma Granted: 500] [Current Karma: 8710/9625] Wait. I didn''t have to wriggle, tuck, roll, scoop or fling? Just a full body shrug and I''m in? I wait for the other shoe to drop. Other claw to scratch? Other leg to wiggle... I wait for karma to balance out this simple convenience! I begin to relax after a few minutes before raising my head to double check that the giant centipede isn''t standing over me, waiting for me to drop my guard. Phew... It''s still glowing in the tank like the demon it is until I''m blinded. This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere. I shriek and flex, burying myself deeper. What was that? When I hear voices I''m glad that I can''t blush. This embarrassment is too much. I wait quietly as the people who enter the room continue talking and move over to my box. Sounds like two of them but I still don''t understand what they''re saying. Something starts splatting on top of my hideaway and I realize that they''re throwing the dirt I kicked out back in. At least that mess is taken care of, but what''s going to happen to me? I scream and flail, my cries doing nothing as two hands easily lift me out of my sanctuary. They''re going to eat me! It wasn''t medicine! It was seasoning! I knew I shouldn''t have eaten all those petals! Someone help! I continue thrashing, not managing to break free or break their hold before I realize that they''re not even trying to hold me anymore. I''d gasp if I could. There''s a girl holding her hand out, fingers outstretched, palm down, and I''m sticking to her hand! She doesn''t have to try to hold me, my sticky skill is stopping me from falling free! The shame is too great. I let my body go as limp as it can and naturally curl up like a little shrimp. Even in defeat I''m pathetic. I sigh and hear the resignation. And, judging by the laughter of the man and woman, so do they. Thinking carefully I weigh my two options. Scream or don''t scream? Decisions, decisions... Who am I kidding? Taste my revengeance! I draw in breath and release it in pleasant surprise as I''m handed a bright green flower with many petals. Don''t mind if I do. Wait! I get more karma if I hide and eat. Put me back in the dirt! I squirm and squeal, trying to break free. The man, concerned, reaches out to take the flower from me and I curl my entire body around it. Touch my butt and I''ll sue! He can''t hear the threat but he gets the gist and leaves me with my latest snack. The two exchange a few words and then the woman scrapes me off of her hand and into the dirt box. Great, now I feel like used gum. Ugh. I flex and I''m instantly buried. Taking a petal I enjoy the strong, tart, sour but sweet, flavor. Kinda tastes like kiwi. [Entomb Successful] [Karma Granted: 500] [Current Karma: 9210/9625] [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 150(+50 Entombed)] [Current Karma: 9360/9625] As I eat, I ignore the other two. They''ve had their fun. I have my meal. Everything''s fine. Everything would still be fine if I hadn''t just heard them mess with the tank in the corner. There''s a scream, a curse, some thudding and I immediately force myself to the bottom of the admittedly shallow box. No one''s home. The pitch and volume rise and fall as the woman shrieks and the man begins to bellow. Idiots release a demon from hell and they''re surprised when it attacks them. Pfft. If I had proper bowels they''d release. The monster can dig! I flex, managing launch myself out of the box somehow, death grip on the green flower even as the room spins around me. I hit the ground, not as hard as I feared, and lie stunned at my show of strength. [New Skill Gained] [Leap] [Karma Granted: 250] [Current Karma: 9610/9625] Hopefully they catch that horrible beast before it has time to end me. I''ve at least bought them more time. My work done, I go back to enjoying my meal. Nom! [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Level Up] [New Skill Gained] [Silk Spray(Tier 3)] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 1)] [Current Karma: 9710/13050] Chapter Five They keep shouting and I wriggle around until I''m lying on my side facing towards the desk that holds my bed box. I can just see the vicious yellow legs and pincer butt thrashing around destroying my box. Those claws are sharp. [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 9810/13050] The man grabs a large thick piece of fabric off of the clothes rack. It stands out against his entire vibe. Dark hair slicked back. Dark clothes that cover up everything but his hands and face. He''s even got a high collar! Lean and dark and now he''s got a puffy white thing on his arm. [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 9910/13050] That is now slowly blackening and turning to ash. That scary bug really is red hot. Tch. Probably dried out the soil in the box. So now we''ve got murder bug and a fire to worry about. Ooh! And it looks like whatever that thing he used as a shield was important. She''s mad. [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 10010/13050] This really deserves some popcorn. I pause, mouth poised over a petal, as the murder bug rears up and looks around. Part of me wonders how long it was scrabbling at the bottom trying to find my very plump and tender self before it noticed I wasn''t there any more, and another part of me tells that part of me to shut up, we''re about to die. It shrieks, more of a high pitched hiss, and charges down the side of the table at me. No solicitors! I flex my body and splat against the wall, sticking in place. [Leap Successful] [Karma Granted: 250] [Current Karma: 10260/13050] [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 10360/13050] Apparently it didn''t notice. Now it''s circling the area I was just in, antenna writhing around as it tries to find my trail. Hopefully it can''t-- of course it smells me. I sigh, put out, as it raises its head and broken steam whistles at me. If it keeps this up I might show it what a real scream is! When I''m screaming in terror! This thing is a nightmare! This time it keeps its focus on me and blindly scrabbles in my direction. What are the two people doing? Don''t they see I''m in danger? Oh, right. The fire. Ooh, it''s spreading. Looks like I''m not dying alone. [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions. [Current Karma: 10460/13050] I drop the flower, needing my hands, and proceed to groom myself. I''m not full yet but a little self-care is most important when you''re stressed. Not sure how good my corpse is gonna look barbecued but I feel better after a bath. Until I see the murder bug again. I yelp, a quick squeak, and launch myself. I''d hoped to make it across the room and near the dirt box, for what that''s worth, but come up horribly short. I end up skidding under the desk, which is not ideal seeing how it limits my movement options, and the murder bug pauses halfway up the wall to my previous spot while looking dead at me. [Leap Successful] [Karma Granted: 250] [Current Karma: 10710/13050] [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 10730/13050] I wasn''t trying to hide under here on purpose. Why am I embarrassed? My pride won''t hurt half as much as the rest of me if that thing gets any closer. Speaking of hurt, it''s a little warm and the parts of me that aren''t wrapped up are starting to dry out. Not this again. The murder bug makes its way back to the ground and just waits. If they could my eyes would widen slowly in realization that the bug knows I''m trapped and it doesn''t even have to attempt to try hard. How arrogant! Fine then. I shall die singing the song of my people! [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 10750/13050] I continue to scream in terror. Terror at my imminent death by being eaten alive. Terror at the horrible future of being burnt alive. Terror at the horrible future of drying out slowly before being burnt alive. A pure song with so much depth. [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 10770/13050] And now a song of triumph! I''d thought those points were from a misguided attempt at the brat to save me before succumbing to the reckoning that is his comeuppance for being an irritating brat, but behold! [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 10790/13050] See how the mighty beast crumbles! See how it flails before my might! See how it -- my throat feels dry. I slam my mouth shut. Oh, no. The murder bug is now just slowly rolling lengthwise along the ground. Apparently I did some real damage. Unfortunately I must now conserve my ammunition for ruining its meal when it gets too close. Let them come, if they will, although I''d prefer if they stayed away! How refreshing! Someone comes in with buckets of water and weird orange sized glass balls that slowly form ice wherever they aim. I squeal, waving my arms and wriggling. The heroes have arrived! Now someone kill that bug! One of the sphere wielding uniformed men rushes over to me and I panic. Not this bug! That one! The red one is the one that started the fire! Go freeze its legs off! I have six and even I think it has too many! Spare me! I curl up and attempt to scream but no luck. I guess it''s a good thing I didn''t have to use my last huzzah. I would have been devastated to find out I''d run out when the murder bug was looming over me! About to die with no witty one-liner. How tragic. I''m scooped up and hurried out of the room before being dumped in Madame Director''s arms. Is it the same day or is she just wearing the same outfit? Either way I''m on my back as she cradles me and I can''t help but wonder what roasted Rising Hill Dew petals taste like. That bastard had interrupted my dinner. The least it can do is try to make it up to me. Chapter Six ? I''m not hungry, I''m not full. ? ? I will give no silk to you! ? I hum to myself, swirling my butt around as a poor guard stands by with one of their silk collection sticks. Dinner was a mess and you want me to put out? I''m not that kind of grub! Poor man keeps looking up at the Madame Director who thinks she''s being clever by pushing on my guts. One of the first things I gained was Iron Stomach. Good luck! You''re up against the core strength that can push out 12 yd of silk in one sitting! Let''s go!~ Uh, oh. I squeak but it''s actually a giggle. Oh, misfortunes of misfortunes! I''m ticklish. And she''s noticed. Eep! I can''t understand her but I just know she''s threatening to continue this mistreatment if I don''t give her what she wants. Oh, who will save me from this fiend? Oh--! Oh! I accept the flower and immediately tuck in. Yum! [Rising Hill Dew Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 10890/13050] Hmm. It''s very resilient. Hadn''t wilted even a little bit. A little warm but still plump and sweet. I freeze, the flower poised for me to pluck another petal. Ack. My stomach! But I hadn''t eaten my ten petals! My record! No! [New Skill Gained] [Rising Hill Dew Thread(Tier 3)] [Earth Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Current Karma: 11090/13050] If I had tears... I sob internally as the relieved guard learns how to spool my silk. Apparently it requires a great deal of skill to take the broad stream of multiple strands and twist them into one thread and wrap that around a stick only using one hand and the stick. But the women made it look so easy. [Earth Silk Produced: 5 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Current Karma: 11890/13050] Oh, the violation! These bastards! What kind of grub do they think I am? They''re taking turns trying their hand at spooling my thread! You''d think the hand off would be the worst part. The guards hand the spool to Madame Director who keeps holding me, cradling me with one arm while casually twisting the hodgepodge they''d made into beautiful thread with the other before passing the stick to a new guard. This only serves to show how skilled she is and how much they have to learn. It''s very impressive. [Earth Silk Produced: 8 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Current Karma: 12490/13050] Hmm? We''re all stuck staring at my rear end. Waiting. The silk stopped coming. What? But. I''m not done. No, really. My guts are still rumbling. Oh. I squirm in discomfort, the precursor to more silk production. Ah, relief! Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings. [Skill Unlocked] [Silk Production(Tier 5)] [Wimble Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 500] [Current Karma: 12990/13050] Much better. I ignore the cheering and celebration over my amazing ability to keep working despite trials and tribulations and try to get ready to go back to sleep. As I''m combing myself I notice a piece of thin paper peeling off. Hmm? The leaf wrapped around my body is drying out and starting to tear. How shabby. Nom. A bit spicy but still palatable. Tastes like raw potato and... Paprika? I squeak in outrage, trying to defend myself and my new meal as the madam tries to pluck the leaf off of me to get it out of my reach and keep it out of my mouth. Are you still challenging my stomach and determination? I thrash, catching some of the leaf she''s tossing away on other parts of my sticky body while cramming as much as I can in my mouth. Who will win? On one side, Madame Director! Her goal is to keep me on a diet that she deems fitting. On the other side... Me! Eater of things and producer of the best silk! I''ve survived fire! I''ve survived Hell beasts! I''ve survived a spoiled brat and his pathetic murder attempt! You dare challenge me? Fight! I cram my mouth full as soon as I get my little hands on anything. Leaf, dried medicine, I think I even take a bite out of Madame Director''s ring but I can''t be sure. She tried putting a hand over my face to cover my mouth and I just filled my arms with more wrappings, using the sides of my butt to scrape loose the stuff I couldn''t reach when I''d felt something clink against my mouth. It wasn''t on purpose but let this be a lesson! I''m not sure if I managed to snag a piece of her hand or if she felt anything at all but she immediately pulls her hand away. Minus a scarf which I immediately begin to scarf. Following instructions! You don''t want me to eat the leaf, is it okay if I eat this instead? She shrieks at my defiance, and, while she''s moaning over her newly bite-marked treasure, I take the time to shove more wrapping into my mouth. Think of it as a grub autograph. I might be famous some day. The distraction allows me to cram my mouth. I don''t have to chew it all down, I just need to get it in my mouth. I''ll chew as I scrape. Champion Food Eater style! If it''s in the mouth it counts! [Plaster Leaf Consumed] [Karma Granted: 200] [Level Up] [New Skill Gained] [Consume] [Metamorphosis(Stage I)] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 1)] [Current Karma: 13190/15150] I briefly pulse with light and know the gods have chosen their champion! [Name: Kissy Kissy] [Greater Wimble Grub Lv.2] [Master: Golden Blade God] I ignore the words. You''re not going to ruin my victory with your nonsense! We have a winner! I raise my arms in triumph, wriggling around in a victory dance. You wanna challenge this core strength? You wanna challenge this appetite? I''m a champion, baby! I freeze and pull my arms back in. Da heck? I look at my arms in confusion. They''re so loooooong. I lift my new gams and kick. The limbs I had before were tiny, little squishy stumps. These are hard chitinous weapons. I went from slipper slip-ons to stilettoes. Let''s go! Ooh, I can reach my back! I twist around and catch sight of my scar. It goes down a good chunk of my back, disappearing up and out of sight before stopping just before my lower back. Waow. Wonder how much speed I can get out of these new babies? I clack my feet together as I get used to them. I could barely move before but I bet these babies would have given the hell bug a run for its money! Very nice! Hopefully Madame Director doesn''t mind me doing a few laps after my nap. Chapter Seven I wake up on a box of dirt in a new room with open windows that lead outside. I hop out, stumble, try to regain my dignity, then take a bath. One doesn''t simply hide legs like these. I saunter around the room, showing off my new mobility while trying to understand my new mobility. I can run. I can scurry. But can I climb? I have to spread my legs and make sure my body connects with whatever surface I''m on now if I don''t want to fall. Apparently my old legs had better grip. [Skill unlocked] [Climb(Tier 5)] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13210/15150] There''s fine hairs along these legs, longer bristling hairs at the joints, but the ends are just plain, sharp spikes. I can hold my body away from the wall if I flatten my legs to it, allowing the hairs to grip... But these hairs aren''t as barbed as the others and anything brushing against them tickles. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13230/15150] I cling to the wall while trying to reassess myself. My legs are predominantly a brownish yellow, black at the joints and very tips. My body is now a kaleidoscope of color. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13250/15150] Before I was sunless pale, more white than yellow. Now I''m pale shades of blue and green with black stripes. I look like I''ve been tie-dyed. The scar on my back is pale yellow now. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13270/15150] I wonder if I''m going to change colors every day or whenever I win a new championship. Maybe I''ll get some red if I defeat the demon bug. Conqueror of hell! Probably lots of spicy foods to eat then. Hm. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13290/15150] I''ve conquered the floor. I''ve conquered climbing. Dare I conquer the ceiling? [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13310/15150] I scurry to the top of the wall and nibble at the ceiling, making a little divot. Whoops. Hopefully no one will notice. The corners are pretty clean up here, so maybe they will. Forgiveness, permission, yada yada. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13330/15150] I flatten my body to the wall and reach up with my legs, feeling around and hoping they catch on to something. No joy. I end up just leaving scratches and gaining no traction. It looks like I''ll have to use my body. [Climb Successful] This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there. [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13350/15150] I wriggle top up, top down, push back my butt, curl up, butt to the wall, then top up to repeat the whole process all over again. I can grip with my mouth if I have to but the fine hairs all over my body seem to do the trick well enough. My legs are great for running around but my hairy body is the only thing keeping this party in motion. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13370/15150] Ha ha! I''ve done it! I''m in the middle of the ceiling! I want to get down now. I''m so tired... [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13390/15150] I''m scared if I just let go then I''ll pop when I hit the ground. I can''t believe I''ve done this... To what end was this little experiment, hm? What was my goal? [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13410/15150] I''m tired. I''m hungry. I want to go home! I wasn''t even done with my nap yet. I was just shifting to get more comfortable. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13430/15150] I wail loudly, railing against the current predicament I''d gotten myself into. How unfair! I wanna get down! I''m hungry! I''m huuuuungry! [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 13450/15150] I pout as someone wanders into the room. Finally! I let go and wait to be caught and fed. It better be good! I''ve suffered, you know. [Skill Unlocked] [Drop(Tier 3)] [Karma Granted: 120] [Current Karma: 13570/15150] I lie, face up on the ground, stunned. I''d landed on their head, my sticky body helping me nail the landing, but then they''d swatted me to the ground! They hadn''t even tried to catch me! Now they''re dancing around making so much noise and trying to fix their hair! Stop messing with your hair and feed me! I scream, frustrated, not bothering to right myself while kicking my legs in the air. Of course I deal no damage. How trash was that kid that my scream affects him? What master? My hairy silk end that kid''s my master! Peh! I keep screaming and waiting for them to feed me. I''m tired! I''m hungry! Why didn''t you catch me? Why did you push me to the ground? Why aren''t you feeding me? Something''s shoved in my face and I bite into it in defiance. Oh. Finally! I grip with my forelegs, the rest curled up as I rest. [Gentle River Bloom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 13670/15150] [Iron Stomach Upgraded] [New Skill Unlocked] [Steel Stomach(Tier 1)] [New Skill Gained] [Gentle River Bloom Silk(Tier 3)] It''s about time! I munch on a blue flower that''s darker than the other one. Tastes kinda like watermelon... There aren''t hundreds of petals, and one nearly did the trick. How could I live with myself if I couldn''t manage to eat a measly 6 petals? [Gentle River Bloom Petal Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 13770/15150] My stomach gurgles. No. I refuse! I can do this! I''m a champion! I''m unstoppable! Let''s do this! [Water Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Current Karma: 13970/15150] I''m a failure. I cry silently as they collect my silk. Only two petals! How can I call myself a champion if I got full on two petals? [Water Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 200] [Current Karma: 14770/15150] Bested by a flower... No. I mustn''t doubt myself. I''ve already proven my appetite time and time again. Maybe I''m full from the bits I ate out of the ceiling? Yeah. No, wait! Usually the flower petals are much, much smaller. These are huge! That definitely makes a difference! [Wimble Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Granted: 500] [Level Up] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 2)] [Current Karma: 15270/17425] I''m a champion! Chapter Nine What is this garbage? What an unfortunate time to find out I don''t have any ability to spit things out... Disgusting! Ugh?! See. This is what I expected leaves to taste like. This is awful. It''s just bad when I bite into it. It gets worst when I chew. A strong flavor of citronella candle with muddy, disintegrating cardboard and notes of dirty asphalt from the bottom of my old high tops. I can tear off the pieces not in my mouth but I. Can''t. Spit. It''s lingering. I still can''t produce tears but I can sob quietly and I do. Why does it taste so bad...? There are shouts of alarm behind me but I don''t leave my post on the window ledge. Have I ever had anything that tasted and felt bad? This has no redeeming qualities. Unless you go with quantity. There are at least ten leaves on this one branch and I only took one small bite out of one and there''s still a lot of the leaf left. And there shall remain a lot of the leaf left. Blech. Oy! I let out a short scream as someone snatches me up from behind. What''s the point of struggling with some rando when I''m struggling with the knowledge that this taste is here to stay? It''s so oily and thick. I try to scrape my tongue off by cleaning my legs but it doesn''t work. I just nibble on my legs. Do I even have a tongue? I spend some time trying to stick my tongue out. I learn that I have two pairs of pinchers on my mouth. I can move them individually. And I still can''t find my tongue. I can kinda poke my face pinchers-- mandibles? -- into my mouth. But I can''t then feel them poking at my tongue. Ugh, what is this face? The person holding me is holding me with my underside out, their hands clasped on my sides. How big am I or how small are their hands that they can''t wrap around me? Giant bugs are gross, even if I am one now. Their hands smell like the dark blue flower. I curl up and try to nibble their fingers to see if they are fingers or if they gave me a food belt and the person screams and drops me. Whoo! I land on three legs awkwardly before catching myself and scrabbling around on all six. That was exhilarating! And no. Those were just fingers. Guess I''m off to find food. I scrabble out of the room, ignoring the screaming coming from behind me. Strafing sideways I look back to see if maybe any of the three people scrabbling after me have a flower or something. She doesn''t... That guard doesn''t... Wait! I back away, keeping them in my sight and scurrying away when they get too close when I see the last guard, someone with more elaborate robes in the same color scheme, dig through his shirt for a box. He pulls out the box, opens it, then pulls out a large, white, many petaled flower, holding it up triumphantly. My man! I go to accept, screaming at the other woman and guard when they come near me. The woman backs off with a scream and the man picks me up like I''m a dog soiling the carpet. If I could I would''ve long ago, trust me, friend. The man with the flower holds it out for me, I accept it, and then he scoops me up and cradles me on my back like Madame Director does. I''m not a baby but this position does make eating a lot easier. Even with the awful taste of the leaf still in my mouth this flower tastes like heaven. It''s firm, soft, melts in my mouth and has a sweet flavor. It''s like if a quality slab of meat was given the texture of giant marshmallow and dipped in sweet wine. Oh, this is good stuff. [Saint''s Tear Petal Consumed] [Karma Gained: 500] [New Skill Unlocked] [Spin(Tier 3)] [New Skill Unlocked] [Saint''s Tear Silk] [Current Karma: 16790/17425] So good... [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 16990/17425] [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 17190/17425] [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Heaven Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Level Up] [Permissions Upgraded] [Awareness Expanded] [Access Granted] [Silk Output] [Access Granted] [Food List] [Access Granted] [Skill List] [Productive(Tier 3) Upgraded] [New Skill Unlocked] [Productive(Tier 3*)] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 3)] [Current Karma: 17890/21375] Oh, ho? The skill upgraded to itself with a star? What''s the star? Wait, why didn''t I understand this setup? It feels like a weird skill tree. But it''s auto-unlocking. Am I supposed to pick or is it class based? What class am I? Just Silk Worm? [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 18090/21375] Why am I spinning but I''m not getting any notifications about silk? Or is it like a progress bar? I have to spin so much and it only counts it by the yd? Why am I only producing yards of silk? Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings. Wait. How am I producing silk from a couple of mouthfuls of flower petals? So, wait, partial production wouldn''t count then, right? Unless I''m under some sort of starter buff. [Saint''s Tear Petal Consumed] [Karma Gained: 500] [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 18790/21375] I peer around the flower to see my rearmost legs spooling, twisting, and spinning my silk into a loose cake. It requires no thought on my part but I''m sure that I won''t be able to move while I''m doing this. Not without ruining the silk, of course. A mental shrug and I wait happily while my attendants carry me through the building while celebrating. This makes up for the leaf. Definitely. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Heaven Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Current Karma: 19490/21375] Is this a weird game or just some weird dream? Is someone standing over me recording me sleeping with some weird caterpillar running all over my face in the real world? Doesn''t matter either way. Not until I wake up. All the way. I ignore everything, deciding to doze lightly until the tank''s empty. Once I''ve got space again I''ll continue eating. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 19690/21375] I wonder how much silk I''ve produced? [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 3)] [Current Karma: 19890/21375] Hmm? What''s this? My idle dreaming resolves itself into... Something. And the voice starts layering over itself into a nightmarish mishmash of resonance and apathy. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Heaven Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Current Karma: 20590/21375]
Silk Tier Karma Color Count Earned Total Produced Total Karma
Moon Silk 3 200 Silvery White 10 2000 42 9900
Sky Silk 3 200 Silvery Blue 12 2400
Earth Silk 3 200 Brown Green 10 2000
Wimble Silk 3 500 Whitish Silver 2 1000
Water Silk 3 200 Dark Blue 5 1000
Heaven Silk 3 500 Golden White 3 1500
*All measurements in yiddits. 1 yiddit = 3 meters Chapter Eight I wake up some time later wondering when I went to sleep. A quick stretch and I''m actually in a familiar room. Or am I? I look for my position relative to a closed door and open windows. Wait. Screened windows. I thought they were unblocked before? Ah, well. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 15290/17425] I quickly scurry up and I check the ceiling near the wall and find the divot and scratches I made. Yep. Same room. Master''s face, I never figured out how to get down. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 15310/17425] Oh, not again, not again, not again, not again! [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 15330/17425] How embarrassing. I''d never understood the videos of animals getting stuck in trees. Stupid beast. Just go back down the way you came! It''s not that simple... [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 15350/17425] I understand now that the claws on those creatures didn''t work both ways. They couldn''t just step down and the claws would work. They probably had to step up first to release the claws, but that just pushed them higher up. My problem is similar. I can stick to the wall, but I only know how to move forward. This isn''t just a motivational thought. I really don''t know how to wriggle backwards. Sounds simple enough though. I should just raise my butt, right? And stretch lower before anchoring my head. But the idea of blindly probing at the ground, and anything waiting below, is terrifying. It just is. But couldn''t I just try to turn around? The idea of staring down from a height that could splat me and end this spoiled life... I''ve never been ambitious. I was happy with my job stocking shelves and doing odd jobs in the store. It was easy. It paid well, then I''d go home and play Trust in the Falling Stars. In Trust my best character was the betrayed love interest of an ambitious boss''s child who gave up trying to have a normal life to try to attain a better status. In the end they realize that all they wanted was the power to live a quiet life. I''d been supporting them, doing what they needed, becoming their greatest weapon and most trusted companion. Then they found someone who was already leading a quiet life without all the politics and intrigue in a place no one could remember. They thought that sounded nice and left everything behind. They''d left me behind. The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there. My character, knowing nothing else and having nothing else, becomes the right hand of the boss''s right hand. The game starts with a detective style espionage mystery where I have to find out why one of the bars/clubs the higher placed members of the organization frequented suddenly had no one to staff it. You end up finding out that there was a package filled with a crystalline power source that someone had attempted to steal. The box was worth millions in a world where a few hundred could set you up for a few years of comfortable living. Then you had to figure out how it got there, why no one stole it and the whole thing turns out to be a simple situation that escalated out of control with people either fearing the box had a bomb, a poisonous material that spread like a virus, or just wanted to distance themselves from the whole thing. It was very silly. But not as silly as my current predicament. To think I''d go from my mundane life to trying to be a diplomat, assassin, researcher, weapons developer, and matchmaker but I couldn''t climb down a wall. I had no fear in the game, just a will to see things through. What''s stopping me now? When I''d leapt before I was secure in the knowledge that I was more bouncy ball than anything else. When did that change? When did I start fearing losing this life? I was afraid of experiencing burning alive, being eaten alive, and starving. But those weren''t threats any more. Did I like this new life better than my own? Or was this just a better game than Trust? [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 15550/17425] I''ve got legs now, what happens if I jump? [Leap Successful] [Karma Granted: 250] [Current Karma: 15800/17425] Apparently I just backflip and land on the floor. Ugh... How embarrassing. Spent all that time freaking out over nothing. Weird how Trust used to be the only thing I really thought about and I''d somehow forgotten all about it. Even remembering it I''m still more interested in what''s going to happen next here than I am in trying to level up my marksmanship or relationship manager skills. How secure are those screens? I scurry over to a window, completely disregarding my earlier nostalgia. I''m here now. I opt out of climbing and try to just jump onto the window edge. [Leap Successful] [Karma Granted: 250] [Current Karma: 16050/17425] Nailed it! Now what''s this all about? It looks like a frame molded to perfectly fit the window. It''s held in place with pressure instead of actual anchors. Unless there''s magic involved? A little test nibble and the screen doesn''t move. It feels kinda like cotton candy... Today''s just a nostalgia trip. I eat the screen, opening up the window and a couple of branches are now within reach. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 16070/17425] [Fine Woven Mesh Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 16170/17425] I mark that I''m actually not on a ground floor then start clearing out the other window screen. The edge of the screen doesn''t bend at all, somehow staying in place and managing to hold the mesh in place perfectly. I only have to concentrate on climbing around the edge of the window, eating the edges of the screen, and then just slurping the center up. [Climb Successful] [Karma Granted: 20] [Current Karma: 16190/17425] [Fine Woven Mesh Consumed] [Karma Granted: 100] [Current Karma: 16290/17425] Not very filling, but neither is cotton candy. Was fun though. Windows now clear I try to decide how to dispose of any silk I produce. Okay. So I''ll just eat the leaves until I get full and hope that I''ve got some natural instincts that help me tack the stuff around the branch. Hopefully without me trying to enshroud myself. Sounds like a plan! Chapter Ten I come to my senses screaming. I have no idea when I started or how long I''ve been doing it but the window that had opened up when I''d idly wondered about silk production is still up. I shudder then quickly look down to see what kind of mess I''d made of my silk. My legs are empty. Fair enough. I wonder if I had a seizure or if my attendants just took it off when I stopped producing. Trying hard not to think of anything I watch my legs spin up behind my ghostly screen before I produce more silk. I wait for it to end. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 20790/21375] [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 20990/21375] [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Wimble Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Level Up] [Permissions Upgraded] [Awareness Expanded] [Access Granted] [Silk Output] [Access Granted] [Skill List(Offensive)] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 3)] [Current Karma: 21690/24000] Now what do I do with this? Nevermind. I track the hand that casually snatches up the loose cake of silk I''d made. That works. I look around for the flower I was eating. Ack. Looks like they took it, too. Fair enough. I groom myself, ignoring the screen but not dismissing it. Oh. It changed. Does it update in real time?
Silk Tier Karma Color Count Earned Total Produced Total Karma
Moon Silk 3 200 Silvery White 10 2000 43 10400
Sky Silk 3 200 Silvery Blue 12 2400
Earth Silk 3 200 Brown Green 10 2000
Wimble Silk 3 500 Whitish Silver 3 1500
Water Silk 3 200 Dark Blue 5 1000
Heaven Silk 3 500 Golden White 3 1500
*All measurements in yiddits. 1 yiddit = 3 meters Bah, I can look at it while I groom, I suppose... Ohhh... I''ve been producing meters of the stuff. Noice. I feel slightly better about my productivity, but I swear I thought silk worms cranked everything out at one time in one go to go into the next stage. Then again I''m pretty sure that silk worms aren''t normally the size of a small child. I''m huge. Wonder if any of them tried to fat shame me yet? I am and I''m the fat one. Now. Where''d that flower get off to? Gotta keep my girlish figure. I scan the room, ignoring the new and familiar faces before I register that the room is practically decorated with partially eaten and still intact flowers. There''s so many! Apparently I can''t drool even as I feel my body prep itself for another good meal. The tank isn''t full. Silk has been produced. Now how do I ring the dinner bell? Feed me! [Resonating Cry Successful] [Karma Gained: 20] [Current Karma: 21710/24000] What kind of low tier idiot gets hit by a bug? Is that kid still in here? Has he not made any improvements? I''m an oversized potato grub and I can take out a human. That''s terrifying. Isn''t the brat trying to get stronger? Wait. I got new permissions to see stuff. What did it say? I dismiss the Production Screen and open up my skill list for offense.
Name Class Tier Description Karma Usage
Resonating Cry N/A N/A Allows Cultivator to channel Qi into scream 20 8
Silk Spray Clear 3 Allows Cultivator to spray out a blast of sticky silk 20 0
Drop Clear 3 Allows Cultivator to sneak attack from above 120 1
Wait, whaaaaaaat? I''ve hit scrubs 8 times with my Resonating Cry? I chortle internally before I notice the description. The author''s narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. I''m sorry, "Qi"? Like martial arts, running-through-the-air, super human, swinging-a-sword-and-pulling-water-out-of-a-lake-in-the-shape-of-a-dragon-that-seems-ludicrously-self-aware-to-attack-your-enemies, "Qi"? I have Qi? Wait. Class and Tier? Ack, urk-- Character Sheet! Profile! What the frack do I have to think to see my status page?
[Name: Kissy Kissy] [Race: Greater Wimble Grub Lv.2] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 3)] [Current Karma: 21710/24000] [Master: Golden Blade God]
F*** this game. I quickly dismiss the status screen. Furious. You all can "Kissy Kissy", my silk hole! How the hell do I change my D*** name? Frickin'' -- Who is Golden Blade God? Not anyone''s master, much less mine! I''m gonna eat the drapes. As soon as I find something expensive to chew on I''ll try to figure out what this "Realm" and "Karma" stuff is. Wanna make me a pet? I squirm around trying to right myself. What the heck am I stuck on? I flex backwards and Madame Director absently shushes me while reading a piece of paper. I didn''t even notice I was being held. Huh. I can''t see what''s on it but she''s focusing awful hard. She''s also got the scarf... Which one to snack on? Better question, which one could I get away with snacking on? Gack? What?! Oh. Kay. While I''d been focusing on what may have been the last decision I made of this life or dream, someone shoved a flower in my face. Sniffing at it it just smells... Pretty? Comfy? It smells like a nap in front of a roaring fire feels after a day of fun in the snow. Yeah, no this is a dream or this place is magic. [Saint''s Tear Petal Consumed] [Karma Gained: 500] [Current Karma: 22210/24000] Oh! This is the flower I was eating when I got my sanity rocked. How did I not notice the smell? I sniff again. Oh. It changes. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 22410/24000] The mouthfeel doesn''t change. Like biting into a huge chunk of meat that just melts with the taste of something soaked in sweet wine. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 22610/24000] Does it just smell like comfort and feel like a good chew? It tastes like something good soaked in sweet wine. Why can''t I pinpoint what "something good" is? Huh. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Heaven Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Current Karma: 23210/24000] Well, this is gonna take a while... At least I''m awake this time. So... I''m gaining awareness? And unlocking new screens... And I have attacks plural? [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 23410/24000] I reopen my offensive skill list to find out what I''ve been missing out on using. Wait until I see that brat again! Argh! Who the hell is Golden Blade God?!
Name Class Tier Description Karma Usage
Resonating Cry N/A N/A Allows Cultivator to channel Qi into scream 20 8
Silk Spray Clear 3 Allows Cultivator to spray out a blast of sticky silk 20 0
Drop Clear 3 Allows Cultivator to sneak attack from above 120 1
[Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 23610/24000] When did I use Drop? Oh... Oh, no... I shriek in amusement, thrashing in entertainment before snickering internally. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Heaven Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Level Up] [Permissions Upgraded] [Awareness Expanded] [Access Granted] [Skill List(Passive)] [Current Realm: Clear(Tier 4)] [Current Karma: 24310/28300] That poor woman! I''d let go of the ceiling and it counted as a sneak attack? I thought she saw me! I wasn''t exactly being subtle. Wasn''t I screaming? I casually discard my silk and someone scrabbles to snatch it off the ground. Oops. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 24510/28300] No wonder she''d freaked out! Ah, that''s hilarious... When do I meet this "Golden Blade God"? I''m going to chew holes in all of their clothes! Drop attack on their head and give them a new haircut! Chunk Bowl cut! See how they like the "Kissy Kissy" special! [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Current Karma: 24710/28300] No! Mine! I swat at some smart aleck who thinks they''re gonna steal my food while I''m distracted. See how much trouble you get in for interrupting my spinning! Back off! Madame Director sucks her teeth then waves them away in irritation. [Spin Successful] [Karma Gained: 200] [Wimble Silk Produced: 1 yd] [Karma Gained: 500] [Current Karma: 25410/28300] Ack! Why do I keep dropping it? I dismiss the skill screen and stare around my flower, trying to get a glimpse of my silk on the ground. I catch a glimpse of it as the same person who grabbed the other cake snatches up this one. That''s one less worry. Now how do I keep hold of this thing? I regard the flower before opting to just curling up around it. Mine! I definitely earned this nap... Spoilers but not *** This rant will continue to grow. This is not a "See Spot run. Run, Spot, run. Spot likes to run. Spot runs everywhere." book series. This is a "what the dog doing?" MC watches a dog sprinting, eyes wide and tongue lolling. Does no one else see this? "Hmm," someone follows MCs line of sight and sees the dog disappear down the street. "Oh, that''s Spot. That dog has way too much energy." series. Same thing. Things will happen. You''re reading what is happening not being told what to think or feel. You get to decide that for yourself. You want to encourage spot? Go for it. You don''t give a fuck about spot? Cool. There will be cultivation and progression clich¨¦s. MC does not know them. If you don''t know them you will miss them. If you do know them, keep an eye out for "easter eggs". MC learns about the shiz later. And sometimes forgets. Because there is a lot~. *** First off: First book is stubbed. Out of over 400 pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! (And tables to the best I could manage) only, maybe 3-4 chapters are on RR. But, gasp!, it says 15 chapters! Out of over 400 pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! Maybe 3-4 chapters are on RR. (Let''s say 3-7. For breathing room purposes.) The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" stuff is. And those chapters are marked B2. For Book 2. And on the fiction page they should have a nifty little section with a different cover. That''s what some of those weird cover chapters with images were about. Because: The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" For those of you who got it the first time, this is for the people in the front who tuned out then went "hey! No one acts like MC!" Correct. Book 2 is more cultivation and progression than litrpg. But this is a series. These things come and go and there''s a ranking system. An actual ranking system within the system and depending on what you rank in, or with whom, you will have access to nifty stuff. Being the emperor''s friend is much better than owning your own house. Because it''s the emperor of the empire versus a piece of property somewhere within said empire. -.- We good? Cool. If not? I don''t know what to tell you. I''m trying not to Chronicles of Riddick you. The second version. I''m all over the first one where you get to figure out the story yourself, not the extended versions where they have random chick in fur bikini tell you everything up front and keep repeating it over and over ruining every twist and turn. And then recapping to make sure you''re not enjoying yourself. ALL the spoilers. But not really, because these parts are already published. For the entire fookin'' published series. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) Posting this as a separate comment because it''s not the first time I answered this, but people keep deleting their comments after I explain. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) I swear some of the reviews were written to help explain the things so people wouldn''t be confused. And then there''s another comment! That mysteriously disappears, ''cause fack all the time I spend answering and anyone else who might have the same question. And gonna make this a separate chapter, I suppose. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) /Synopsis/Recap Literally the leader of the empire goes, oh neat, there''s another god tier person here. Then wtf is this because he doesn''t understand wtf Kisandera is doing grooming and making silk and eating garbage. MC is ignorant of the way things work. Other people are taking advantage of that. Or they think it''s just some OP treasure/bot with nonsensical, poorly programmed reactions. I tried to make this clear without just saying it based on how other people aren''t taking MC serious despite all the weird shit they can do. Their reactions and responses verbal and non-verbal. Fail, I guess. I even put it in the book description... WTF. Their attacks and the things they use the most keep updating and evolving. They keep unlocking new shit. They just don''t get personalized notifications or know how to access the notification system, and then they lost permission to do it at will. I rambled about this. In book. Without the exact phrasing because MC doesn''t know the shiz exists. You as the reader might, the other characters hint that they do, MC doesn''t. MC is literally that one person who plays a game, says it''s garbage, doesn''t know what they''re doing, refuses to check the wiki because all the stuff should be in game already, lucks into some amazing bullshit, then you find out later they didn''t know they could use a backpack. Or that there''s a skill list. Or waypoints. Or a reputation shop. Or any of the things that make the game playable. Hell. A crafting interface. The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation. MODESTY keeps telling them how much OP dragonshit they keep doing, tries to get over the envy, then tries to explain to Kisandera that there''s a lot of stuff they need to pay attention to that they''re not even looking at. There''s a tutorial. That''s how everyone else knows this basic shit. Kisandera keeps timing out of it by SLEEPING while they cycle. The closed door cultivation is a thing. The gaining insight while meditating is a thing. Sometimes they stumble on new insights while rambling in their head, but there''s a fully interactive world the triplets are getting access to and learning from that Kisandera is managing to avoid. The whole "we can see it when you see it" then kIsandera going wow, how are they learning all this shit? Then napping some more. This is why the system is trolling them. It is personal. At one point in time they learned how to silence the notifications or set them to important only. Then ignored them. On purpose. And called them annoying. Then started moping ''cause they didn''t know how to get them back. They didn''t mute them. They got turned off. They have to turn them back on again. They''ve barely got an understanding of how permissions work. The miasma thing is a character alteration item with a 90% chance to pull a "wish granted". It''s why people avoid the shit out of it. You want radiant skin? Congratulations, you''re radioactive. When they (Kisandera) keep mutating it''s because their idle thoughts of "I want to be able to do this turn" into "congrats, you''ve unlocked". There''s a 10% chance you''ll get what you want, and a 1% chance you''ll get it the way you want it. Yes, this is a reference to loot boxes and shitty RNG when they lie about the chances of you getting a super rare item. Back to MC doing something they''ve been doing and it suddenly changes. That''s them unlocking a new version of the skill. And it takes them by surprise because they can''t access notifications. Sometimes they remember, most of the time they just think it''s a hiccup. Miasma doesn''t change skills, it only changes appearance. Dude wants tiger hands. Chance he''ll just grow harder nails, chance he''ll get human hands that look like tiger paws but aren''t, chance his hands will get stronger and look tiger-y and be tiger-y, chance he''ll actually get anthro tiger hands that are super awesome. Then he''ll have access to developing tiger claw attacks, doesn''t just give them. Miasma doesn''t give him access to the skills. Having the claws and learning to use them will. What else to rant about? MC loses access to their logs but other people can still access them. The logs are there. Will always be there. Whether or not the Kisandera loses permission to go to them doesn''t affect other people''s permissions to access them. Back to trolly system thing. There is the option to just know what''s in the logs versus searching for lines, or looking at spreadsheets, what? you can change view? even into lists?, but there''s also the option to integrate the logs into memory. MC does this almost instinctively, bug instinct hack, with things they eat, hence gaining rip off spider abilities or dragon scale. MC could produce silk already, MC is a moth thing with hair and scales, eating them didn''t unlock the skill so much as having the tools available already and learning a new way to use them. So could eat dragon, no scales? no dragon scale skills. Want breathe fire? No fire essence? no breathe fire for you! MC started off with a spatial realm that they thought was just a spatial storage/bank, the box inventory interface was a display of what was in the space not the space itself. When they went into the outer space starry galaxy area and built a storage facility, that was them actually building into the spatial realm. Spatial realm is like the in game housing system where you take a portal to a private area you can customize. To a point. Kisandera uses essence and "materials" from things they''ve eaten. They can also make shit if they have the right materials for it. They can convert essence into materials. They can''t make things without getting a certain amount of it and knowing what it is. So no meteor/star metal weapons just because. Funny thing is the tutorial had some bootleg copies to impress students with enough in all the tools gathered to actually make a nugget of star metal to start actually producing it but nobody knows that yet XD. Those flying black weapons that kisandera stole weren''t just steel. They were just mostly steel. Which isn''t all steel. Exam spoilers!! Inside the exam where there was a field of flowers that come from different places and have different elements and if you get too close or interact directly with them you get affected by them are gathering points for all the loot of all the students that died. The blue crystal kisandera found is concentrated Qi. Crystalized Qi. What from the people who dead and the plants. Cycles Qi in the area helping it be the psychotic mishmash it is without turning into a miasma dense hellscape. They find several jade stones. Storage stones, that are all the jade storages that were dumped during the exam. People with permission, instructors sent to retrieve so and so''s storage because their clan/family paid for it to be returned, can break off pieces of it with storage intact. Kisandera wasn''t supposed to be able to see the treasure piles and ends up just stealing them which increased their rank ''cause obviously they''re not common to be able to pull that shit off. Yes, this will piss off a lot of people who will try to subtly make things worst for Kisandera. Kisandera used a waypoint they didn''t know about. The shortcut in the trap house? That''s a maintenance tunnel to help reset the traps. Their OP void accessing permissions let them access spatial shit. Period. They have a built in master key/transport pass. Bug them knows this. They them do not. Bug them is a fookin'' insect and unable to communicate other than to do or not do. Kisandera is an unobservant, non-animal friendly person who just goes, oh, ew, why''d I do that? So, moving on... This is a slice of life series. A long running, from birth to finish, (Godhood? You really think so?), story about a person who was reborn into a place they have no concept of. As far as everyone else in the world is concerned their lack of knowledge, or very specific limited knowledge, makes them a talking treasure. Not even an NPC. A chatty tool. The other characters aren''t NPCs. The NPCs are the one-offs stuck in a loop. You will notice them if you''re looking for them. They don''t do much, are highly specialized, and they don''t do much else. It''s easy to know where they''ll be and what they''ll be doing. Some people will try to live that NPC life, merchants and cozy lovers, but then they get home and take the costume off. Am I going to tell you who they are? Nope. Can you guess? If you want. Will you be right? Sometimes. A routine doesn''t equal a script. There''s a difference. Questions? Ask away. Just... Don''t delete the comment after I answer because that gets rid of the answer, too. Other people might be stuck on the same question. Imagine a world without wikis and FAQs. And you will be the MC. Repeated for your enjoyment. Cover Art Literally cannot draw but learning image manipulation? Feels cheap but people get pissy about attempted writers being too poor to pay someone more than they''ve made on a book for a picture so... Which is better? AI generated Image from prompt that I then modified to closer resemble what I wanted? Original modified AI cover Prompt generated Wax aphid, green onion, flower petal, flying bug *with six wings, Kissy was going to end up with six wings and wimbles have large flower petal looking wings wax aphids look like "fairies" but are supposedly really nasty bugs wanted something that would kind of look like the plants, the grubs are supposed to be herbivores and the adults are carnivores or omnivores, wumples are herbivores slow, with high def and str and low speed and can be sheared like sheep but are cow sized Inspired by wax aphids, a nightmare I had of some random psycho harvesting onions out of an empty lot, what if butterflies moved like sea animals named after them? so sails that look like flower petals, and then from butterfly to moth Or generic Paint Edit? This novel''s true home is a different platform. Support the author by finding it there. Inspired by Kissy''s mutations from generic not butterfly moth middle, to somethings not right top moth to, wtf is that bottom moth remade with feedback from OneFellow Another attempt Different composition attempt Brown for earth, blue for wind, black for demonic, flowers for etting single butterfly moth, horns look more distinct Ditto but no multiple colors on the demonic moth butterfly literally splotches of color with strands coming off of them to simulate stems swirls of black and blue for demonic and wind over brown background for earth Six winged not moth with multiple antenna, not feathery, not that confident, look like horns, ooh spooky? and six wings Literally not looking for feel good BS. What grabs your attention more in a field of possible covers? Literally months of writing, haven''t made 30 bucks but I''m reading that you shouldn''t use AI to generate images for your cover because who''s going to pay the artists? People who aren''t paying me. If you''d like to pay for the cover and not take credit for my work, cool, but why shit on me for being poor and creative and tell me to pay someone else when they make more money than I will off of my idea? AI Generated Art Not sure what other people do but I write story. I make characters. I can''t draw. I is poor and literally trying to gain new skills so I can get paid minimum wage. I write. I make prompt. I generate image until I see what I want. If I don''t and I run out of free attempts? I go back the next day after it resets and keep trying. With different art styles and fine tune the prompt based on what the AI thinks it''s giving me. I want a specific texture? Keep generating images and futzing in paint. Usually the AI beats me to it, but I still have to tweak it. But it''s still a ton better. Example: Have 12 different images I thought were close enough to try to work on for moth kissy. Kept generating them then working on modifying one to get "close enough". Day 3 it gives me something, a whole image, I can use. A lot of the images are clipped and super asymmetrical. But it''s better than I can do. I don''t just find an image, and make a story around it, and I do point out that I make the cover with AI image generator from a prompt. If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation. When I remake my synopsis trying to fine tune my shiz sometimes I forget to put it back up. But I''ve posted/admitted/confessed (gasp!) that I feed a prompt into a free site and praise it for the way it attempts to translate my ramblings. The attempts are great sometimes. So much nightmare fuel. Or cheap knockoff plushies. It''s literally given me like wish.com review plushie images that trigger all kinds of buyer''s remorse for things I haven''t bought. ''Cause I''d rather have deodorant and phone time. First Rating on Amazon Three stars so it is officially confirmed that my work against the greater whole is only mid. No review, just stars, but a full three stars. Not sure what they liked or didn''t like or if they just wanted to put a rating, but there you go. Still available on KU for "free". KU requires a subscription so... Not really free... But it''s there. So thanks for all the support, still writing Spoiled II, The Spoiled Class Pet, not sure how well it will fair. On chapter 21 on Patreon or you can read chapter 1-3 on Kindle Vella. Took a break to try to crush the writathon goal on a new work that I made specifically for the writathon. That''s LFW (three letters written with a finger in "mud" as a simple prayer). Another isekai story but the MC is more familiar with open world crafting games where combat''s how you farm some mats. If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it. But mostly this post was to mark the whole first Amazon rating thing. The rest is a semi-informative ramble? B2 Chapter One -*Now we get off the rug,*- Maru smiles stiffly while grabbing my arm and dragging me off. Oh, right. Introductions. "Madame Director, --" -*We''ve got it,*- Adonia reassures me as Shimmering Steel glares between all three of them, ignoring me completely. "Ten thousand-year treasure and I should shut up and sit quietly in the corner," I grumble, opening my eyes wide and waggling my head from side to side. "You taught it this?" Shimmering Steel points at me and I want to be pissed but every time I turn to shout at her I see that damned eye patch and the horrible scarring around it. "''It'' who? What happened to your eye?" I murmur. There has to be a way to fix this. -*We''re gonna sit off to the side, you keep collecting energy, okay?*- Heran says while Maru and Madame Director casually frown at each other from less than two feet away. Where''s Rin? And the soldiers? And what did the emperor give you guys? -*Rin''s getting debriefed, the soldiers are going to be investigated, the badges are mega artifacts. Uber stink guards,*- Heran says while idly running a finger over the badge. What the hell is that? -*They''re Sacred Lions. You saw a carriage pulled by them earlier. You called them feral unicorns.*- -*Did you figure out how to send yet, stupid bug?*- a gentle, comforting voice soothes me from inside my own head and I clench and stare wide-eyed at a frowning Shimmering Steel. "Why does she sound like that?" I point to my head when I turn to Heran. -*Stupid bug, can''t you speak normally?*- "Stupid bug? Stupid you! I wake up on a hill in a field of death, earn merit by clearing demonic aura and creating helpers to figure out how to get to wherever Golden Idiot sent us, and you call me stupid bug? We clear out cultists and detoxify another area, disabling traps, and you call me stupid bug?" I roll my eyes and shake my head at my children. "You see them? You''ve talked to them? I bring them to you, and you call me stupid bug? "I make special silks and create rare treasures, clear dangerous zones, earn merit and get acknowledged by the emperor, and you call me stupid bug? See if I ever talk to you!" I turn my back on her angrily, crossing my arms and shaking my head before hissing over my shoulder. "No, I haven''t learned Sending but I learned a lot of other useful things." I watch as Adonia and Heran stand around, occasionally intercepting people who try to get my attention. How are we not swamped? I look around and realize that we''re still in the main room standing with other people wearing badges. Or not. I look down and realize I''m the only one without a golden lion badge. I start looking around becoming more and more alarmed as I see that, yeah, no, I don''t have a badge. I don''t need a stink blocker but surely not everyone needs a badge, right? Why can''t I hear my kids again? -*We''re silently being embarrassed for you,*- Adonia says teasingly arms crossed before bumping their hip against mine. I suck my teeth and let my arms fall. Why won''t you teach me how to do this? The sending thing? -*Why do you have so much money?*- Madame Director peeps up and I whip around to glare at her. "By eating people," I snark before turning my back on her again. -*Mom,*- Heran sighs, head resting on my shoulder. I rest my head on their head and wait for something to happen. Wait. I have money? All of my children sigh in disgust. Before I can say anything else Madame Director joins them. "Shush," I say loudly before looking for a pile of something to find out what this world''s currency is. -*Number in the corner,*- I look top right and see a button that says reputation. What''s this--? -*Focus, dammit,*- Maru hisses and I look in the top left. There''s a fucking clock? I focus on the six digits with two colons and it expands into a fucking calendar. Fuck. Everything. I refocus on my bank and check bottom left to find money. 5E13K125P52R145Da82De72k. Numbers and letters? I focus and another inventory pops up, called wallet of all things, and it''s filled with... Coins and stones? What? Oh! What Klari was talking about. Emperor, Kings, Princes, Regents, Dalin, Denii, Kin and Spirit Stones? -*For context you could probably buy a compound like the one the nursery is in for two Kings and own it outright, no taxes, but you do have to pay tribute or contribute fighters to the army,*- Maru says in the calmest non threatening manner I''ve heard in a long time. She and Madame Director appear to be getting along a little too well... -*We both have to put up with your shit.*- And you''re compensated, aren''t you? "Hey..." I whisper to Adonia who looks amused and horrified and I haven''t done anything. "How much was the silk worth?" I jump as everyone starts sending at once. I can''t not hear any of them but I can''t process a bit of what they''re saying. It''s like when the voice starts reading everything at one time but less monotone. What happened? What broke now? I''m left staring at the wall trying to piece my thoughts back together before I realize that they''re quietly talking to one another. Out loud. I clear my throat and go to rub my eyes. My face is wet. There are faces along the edges of my screen. I can see through them but there''re my kids'' and Madame Director''s faces. Just lined up on the edge of the screen. I focus on one and a black and purple oscillating border forms around them. That''s Heran. Adonia is blue and black flames and Maru is black crystals with sharp white edges. A mental jab at Madame Director''s portrait and it''s literally just flowers. Wait. The flowers are made of crystals. Her voice is gentle and comforting, this border is all bounty and nourishment. Can she heal me by touch? I don''t know what kind of shit the emperor''s trying to pull but I know my Madame. I turn to glare at her and the borders on every icon except hers disappears. The tale has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident. -*What did you do to me?*- I demand and she lights up. Then my children light up. And their borders light up. -*Did you assholes just break my brain?*- Yay, I can fucking send. But at what cost? I feel awful. -*And I''m the stupid one? I''m tired so remember it''s your fault when I wake up hungry. I''m going to sleep.*- I scoff and shake my head before storming off. I don''t know the etiquette for leaving but we were already dismissed. My children take turns trying to explode my head and I ignore them. Adaptive mutations, yay. I''ll just head out to the scale tree forest. So do I fly deeper into the forest or transfer? Either way I''ll be relatively safe and when I wake up and start eating the trees I''ll gain more merit, get food, and have more produce. But do I start on the edge and work my way in or just hop inside and then start eating whichever direction the wind blows? Should probably check on that, make sure there''s nothing that draws my attention away from the trees. I stop and look up and all four icons are lit in the corner of my vision and Golden Blade God is looming over me and glaring. He''s actually pretty big. "What?!" That''s not what I meant to say at all. Ugh. I''m tired. "Stupid bug, you dare?!" He roars. Before I can go to apologize he punches me in the face. "Oy!" What the hell? I''m pretty sure you''re not supposed to attack guests in the presence of the emperor! My indignation isn''t as great as his surprise. I know he didn''t put any force into it but did he really think something capable of bodying his phoenix was going to get taken out with one hit? I''m pretty sure I learned Arcane Fire from eating the attack. We''re surrounded by people in red trimmed golden uniforms with a giant fluffy white feather poking out of the top of their marching band hats. They look like they''re in a marching band while wearing waist aprons. Now I can''t un-see this. Soldier chefs! They dish it out across the field! Golden Blade God is sputtering and pale as he realizes the guards are their for him, not me. "Why''d you hit me?" Why am I so grumpy? "I was invited here as a guest!" "You can''t be! You''re a monster!" He shouts, finger in my face and I wonder if I can bite it off now. "His Imperial Highness," Madame Director smoothly rolls up, making eye contact, singular, with the bastard while gesturing respectfully back they way I''d come, "proclaimed Kissy as a 10,000-year treasure and set them into my keeping. The Void bug earned great merit and even stood unassisted in the presence of his Imperial Majesty." "The kid that''s not a kid? He said I was funny," I grumble. Fuck, I''m tired but I want to see this dude get put down and Madame Director looks like she''s more than ready. "Void bug?" I don''t know what he''s thinking about but his color changes as his eyes dart back and forth at some weird connections he''s forming that I''ll probably not figure out for another month or two. "Is that how it survived my Saintly Fire Shimmering --" "That fucking name," I interrupt in remembered irritation. "Who the hell named us?" I look between Madame Director and my kids as the guards politely manhandle an indignant Golden Toilet away as he defends the ridiculous name of his teacup phoenix. -*Peacock,*- Adonia corrects me over my shoulder. Fuck your teacup poodle. -*Your world was weird.*- -*Oh, like this one is normal?*- I''m not disagreeing but I''ve seen some really weird shit here. -*Yeah,*- a group retort. To be fair this is the only world they know. My memories of my world don''t count as much other than interesting videos from their perspective. I don''t even know where those memories are. I swear I lost a good chunk of my mind but I''ve got the reflexes and attitude I earned. -*Logs! We keep telling you! Your memories! Your thoughts! The you that is you isn''t in your body or spirit, it''s in your logs-suh!*- Maru stomps and whines from my right while bouncing in place. Oh. A chorus of disgusted sighs and Madame Director takes the lead with a Send order of "follow". And we''re off. I''m tempted to just go back to the carpet and shift so we can teleport out but that dreams crushed almost as quickly as my offer to siphon harmful energies from people. What''s the progress on that, by the way? -*Minimal,*- Adonia stands on my right, eyes forward, face stern but open. I look around and everyone''s facing forward looking politely uninterested and mildly inapproachable as Madame Director plows through the crowd. I see her awful blocker --. -*Stink guard,*- Heran chimes in from behind me. Are you guys really keeping track of my thoughts in real time all the time? -*We take turns,*- Adonia quips over my shoulder. She''s shields up and plowing through everyone. Oh. So are you guys. Wait. Can I do that? My barrier only makes a dome in front of me. -*We''ll work on that later,*- Maru sighs and by now even I understand that there''s something super obvious I''m missing that they don''t want to tell me about in case it influences my understanding of things and stops me from making weird connections that also help them progress in their mutations. But it''s still frustrating! -*We know,*- Heran nudges me from the left and Adonia pats my right shoulder on my right. Madame Director in front and my kids doing some weird shuffle around me to keep people off of me. But why are they constantly moving? -*Some people are coming over to talk to us directly so we shift around until they either change their mind or see something they don''t like,*- Adonia informs me while dropping behind me before Maru tugs on my left arm and we all sidestep around a group in a much narrower but still massive hallway. -*So far you and Heran are getting the most positive feedback while Shimmering Steel gets the most irritating guests. They usually turn away when they see our badges.*- Should I be carrying the shield the emperor gave her, then? There''s a synchronous misstep among the kids and Madame Director whips around quick to address whatever happened. Did I have another big brain moment or did I say something wrong. Madame Director focuses on me with her one good eye, I can''t not think about it, I really can''t. -*We''ll fix it soon, most likely,*- Maru says offhandedly on my right and I''m not sure to be excited or go into mourning. Is Madame Director going to start mutating or are we going to heal her? -*The last one, you weirdo.*- Maru scoffs while falling back with Heran taking their place on my right. Maru shakes her head at me and I''m left wondering why she assumes Madame Director is safe from mutations bound to me and them at the same time. Maybe it''s already started. And now they''re quiet ''cause Mom''s built different and thinks different but Momma still thinks. Eat that, bishes! -*Almost there,*- Adonia nudges me from the right to go left and I''m glad I''m so resilient or my neck would be killing me right now. The Spoiled Class Pet w/poll Removed from Kindle Vella, no views and I was grinding out chapters after LFW as a personal challenge, so Book II, The Spoiled Class Pet, is almost ready for release.
Kis-- Sandy has been recognized by the Emperor himself and released into the care of Thousand Valleys to continue their service to the Empire. Now that they''re recognized as an asset not something to be put down, with a cohort of advisors and a clear understanding of what''s expected of them, why the fuck do they have to go to school? You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author. What? They can''t just go? They have to prove they''re good enough for the school? Training? More work? But they didn''t want to go in the first place! So Sandy, Adonia, Heran, and Maru are team Take out the Trash, producing treasures and kicking ass. Unfortunately they seem to be way~ too into efficient production. Maximum efficiency and maximum productivity. Nature vs nurture, Shimmering Steel is a terrible influence on Kisandera''s precious spew babies. Cover Vote w/poll! Cover voting time! Original Cover is what I''ve been using over on Patreon and had slotted, well, minus the blank spots for the png. Have louder, messier, and cleaner, less AI-y alternatives, which also act as demonstrations for why the fuck I''m using AI. A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation. Original Cover: Alt 1: Alt 2: Alt 3: Alt 4: B2 Chapter Two When we get outside we''re not in the mass at the entrance. We''re not at a servant''s entrance, it''s too nice. Unless this place is just pretty at all times? Different world, different rules. Things look busy but not front of the building and main hall busy. The streets are made of interlocking stones or stone tiles but with the spaces between filled properly so there''s no cobblestone experience. Nice. If I trip and fall on my face I won''t have the ground to blame. There aren''t curbs so far as the areas in front of the buildings slope down into a dip which rises back up to the road. Gasp! Self-draining roads? Wait. So... Are we advanced or primitive or shut up, it''s magic? -*Magic.*- -*Last one.*- -*Mom, keep calling us primitive and I''m going to you you.*- Heran steps in front of me and glares at me blankly. I go back over my thoughts then try to clarify with what I''m familiar with, --why do my logs work now but not when I''m trying to find things? -- then compare them. I haven''t seen a single bathroom, true I haven''t needed to --. -*No one needs to as much as your disease ridden world''s dried grass and brittle glass inhabitants,*- Heran snaps, hands going to their hips. Um... TVs? -*Um, actual productive and healthy work?*- Adonia retorts. Computers? -*Sendings?*- Adonia rolls their eyes before looking me dead in the eyes. -*Compared to your people we''re gods.*- "When we get sick it''s not because we poisoned ourselves with "food", it''s because we tried to consume something with an incompatible affinity." Adonia pauses then invades my personal space then leans in causing me to lean and tilt my head back to get some room. "How many people does your world have because your race is a what now? A mammalian virus? How healthy was your world? You wanna go to space? Bish we''ve got planets you can explore once you get your Qi or Karma high enough! This place is hell? Compared to your last life this place is paradise!" You just pulled a me and said all of that out loud, I inform Adonia as I stand with head back from the sheer force of the tongue lashing I just received. There are a couple of people in embroidered and gilded clothing looking at us in amusement. Ooh, we lookin'' basic. But good points all. And you didn''t spit all over me while ranting. This world is better. Thank you for your time. "Now I need a nap," Adonia grumbles while walking a few steps away to stand near Madame Director. She''s just watching us, one hip cocked and resting the back of her wrist against it. Not us. Watching me. Fuck, lady, what''d I do now? "You have Qi?" Shit. I know that it sounds innocuous but I know better. She''s gonna find more work for me to do. "You can cultivate? You need training." She nods to herself and straightens up. Called it. "We need to get you into a school." Irrational anger. I know it is. I know she doesn''t mean that I need to be potty-trained. I hope she doesn''t mean I need some kind of beast training. She said Qi. I need to focus on Qi. I''m a grown ass adult trying to get home and go back to doing my job, a job I''m uniquely skilled for and I bet she''s gonna expect me to keep working while doing whatever schooling she thinks I need. -*You''re not wrong,*- Maru admits and I clench my fists, clench my teeth, hold my breath, do everything I can to not punch anything or start screaming. And I end up screaming in my throat. One. Ow. Two. Fail. "Gods dammit..." I sigh before rubbing the bridge of my nose with the index and middle fingers of both hands. One pair to either side. Rub rub rub, pet pet pet, calming breaths. Select every icon but Madame Director. -*What does she have in mind?*- Fuck, my head... -*You can''t just join a school,*- Madame Director scoffs, a quick swipe of her hand dismissing the foolish idea. -*You need to undergo aptitude testing. Then there''s a petition period and an interview process. If you get accepted you have to take the entrance exams. All standard. You have the Emperor''s favor. That doesn''t make you unique. Means you have to work harder to prove you earned it. Do not embarrass Thousand Valleys.*- "What the fuck!" Shit. Fail. I totally screamed that last part. All this work to get home and prove I''m not a world devouring monster and all I did was prove I can work harder. That''s not what I am or what I''m about. Gods dammit. -*You wondered why she was so badass,*- Maru is seriously failing to hide a smug smirk. -*You''re about to find out.*- -*You''re grinning like you''re not going to be forced to come with me,*- I say and she stops trying to hide the smug. -*I''m gonna be learning how to help with the compound.*- Compounds, I remind her. And remember all of the paperwork and the fact that Madame Director is bad ass because she is bad ass. Not just because she can kick my ass. All the paperwork, all the time, all the farms and politics. I feel my face twisting into a smug smirk even as Maru''s falls into a frowning glare. All the reports from all the different farms that have to be treated differently. All those elements to memorize and study. And manage. You''re welcome. I drop into a crouch hand over my head and screaming in mock fear as Maru slowly winds up to punch me in the face. I grin up at her, staying crouched, keeping my balance with fingers against the less polluted and litter free ground. -*It''s much easier with proper disposal,*- Madame Director reassures her before looking at me. -*You know a productive garbage disposal in our family. Remember to balance the value of the produce to the balance of the silks that one can produce.*- -*And Orbs, and venoms, and they can convert between different elements,*- Maru responds in our happy little group circle and I''m feeling betrayed. -*Have fun cleaning up my poop,*- I glare at her and she just laughs at me. -*Is it doing it now?*- Madame Director looks at Maru in shock. -*"It" your face! "It" can be your new eye. Stop calling me "it"!*- I snap. I want to point but that didn''t work so well last time so I just glare at the eyepatch. -*Who took your eye? You call them "it"?*- "Who would dare touch me," she sneers and I know there are many people who would dare. Pretty sure I ate some of them when I grew wings. "I did it to prove my loyalty. Golden Blade said they knew nothing of you when I''d tried to hand you over so they could take you for testing and disposal. They said I had you for years for you to grow to your state." "The guy you tried to bind me to? The one who got taken away by the guards?" Ooh... I''m feeling better already. "He hit me with the emperor there. Why was he so important? Is he going to be stripped of his position?" Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there. "He''s my nephew," she grumbles and walks away. Mouth dropped I almost say something before my mouth snaps shut and I double check to see who''s highlighted. I unselect Madame Director then gape with eyes opened wide. -*Was she crying?*- I can''t quite recapture the feeling that I had before but I can kinda remember the shock and heartache. -*You can eat him next,*- Maru says, thoughts dark and tone even. I jump back and resist slapping out in fear as Adonia tries to lift my shirt up. The hell? Adonia snorts and I wonder what I said to make them think undressing me is --. Oh! Right. I''m our ride out. They start laughing and I remember that I''m okay with walking around naked. In this body and my wimble form. Wait. Not wimble. Guess I owe Lana an apology and a promise not to eat her parakeet. -*The fuck is a void moth?*- I ask while stripping off my clothes manually. Are we going to the forest? I''m still hungry and tired. -*We''re still going,*- Adonia says stiffly. I narrow my eyes at them. Why you being shady? Maru grabs Madame Director by the arm and she flips her shit. I gag as I watch her break Maru''s elbow. No, now Maru''s elbow bends that way. What? Everything Madame Director does Maru just counters by converting their body, oh, they''re all black now. They''re not in a hunan form, they''re just sentient demonic energy. I feel my heart pounding, it''s in the wrong spot and really big but it''s there, as Maru''s in they''re demonic form in the anti demon bug center with a saint shield on ignores the beating Madame Director tries to lay down! I want to cheer but Heran slaps their hand over my mouth. I go to thank them and my guts cramp. What? Oh! Oh, no! I open my bank already knowing what I''m going to find. I look for the full heavenly meter and it''s not full. But other bars are looking a lot fuller. Nevermind. No, I don''t. Heran gets me in a headlock and Adonia puts their hand to my chest as Maru disrespectfully ignores the screams of startled passerby and the damage Madame Director is doing. I want to scream but I can''t as I watch Maru rip off the eye patch and jam the end of a nub on another arm they''ve sprouted into the scarred and somehow still healing socket. There''s an easing of pressure and I sag in relief. I don''t bother moving as Heran sets me on the ground. Logs. Which tab? Skills? Holy shit. I know they can do stuff without my input but this is a lot. Over 120,000 heavenly converted into other energies. Life got a 2:1 conversion of 20,000 for enough to make an orb. I knew I was orbing something but Heran stopped it somehow. Very unpleasant, please don''t do that again without good reason. I don''t even, no we''ve been here for a few hours, haven''t we? Did they drain their badges into me? What the hell? Over 5000 saint from converting 100,000 heavenly. Isn''t the conversion rate 2 per minute? Wait. You assholes! Is that why my head was killing me? I felt sick! I''m starving and you guys were fast-forwarding me? Watch if I don''t pass out and make this your problem! Why did you need all of that? 10,000 life and 5,000 Saint spent on regeneration? Regenerating wh--. I raise my head and Madame Director is straightening her hair. Did she already get over getting her eye back? Even her scars are healed. Couldn''t you guys just use Qi, wait, I can do what? I learn how to Send after you nearly shout ''splode my head. I learn how to fast repair when you lot use me as a medical treatment center. I want to check my skills but I wasn''t joking about the whole passing out thing. My head is killing me. I close my eyes and let it go. I try to open my eyes and can''t. I''m on my back and nodding off already. How? How long was I out? Does this still count? Not in the mood. I''m taking a deep breath with someone nudging my hip. Am I naked? I''m not sure how I feel about this. Depends on what they''re looking at while they''re nudging me. I open my eyes, -- victory! -- and see Lana staring in awe. I have no idea where this room is. There''s a window in the wall I''m resting along, what may or may not be a three drawer dresser against the wall past my feet, a tall thin piece of furniture that either has nearly 20 small drawers or is just carved with handles to make it look like it has 20 drawers off to my right on the wall at my head end, and a very small table with a pitcher and a bowl with a towel in it and a mirror leaning on the table against the wall closer to my right. My arms are spread out, I have one leg hanging off of the raised piece of furniture and I don''t know if I''m on a table or a bed and broken rainbow is staring at me as my nethers jiggle when she pokes at my hip with the heel of her hand. There''s a closed door behind her and I wonder if it''s to stop people from seeing what she''s doing or if we''re locked in here for some reason. I''m wearing pants so I''m not quite sure what she thinks she''s seeing, but still. "Lana? Why are you staring at my junk?" She turns to me with a confused expression and I notice a reflected prism on her face. Wait. I sit up and the light shifts. Oh! She''s not staring at my crotch she''s playing with the lights sparkling off my scales. Why am I so shiny? While I''m figuring out the lights and staring at my concerningly clear but solid color glitter trimmed scales I get to see Lana connect the dots out of the corner of my eye. Brows go from furrowed to slowly relaxing, her eyes and mouth widening, pale complexion going from corpse pale to stare at the sun pale, pupils constricting then dilating as she turns to look me in the eyes while red splotches form across her corpse complexion. Seriously, my scales look like someone couldn''t decide what to paint their nails so they tipped them all the colors of chunky glitter with a prismatic "clear" coat on top. "How long was I out and why''d you think it was okay to play with my passed out body?" I wonder if she did this? That''s a lot of glitter. And a lot of fine detailing. It''s not perfect but there''s no obvious smudges anywhere. These can''t be my scales. they''re almost thumb-nail sized now. I''m mildly offended but honestly curious. We didn''t leave on the best of terms and she''s just casually messing with me while I''m unconscious. And where in the hells am I? Oh! Is she going through grief stages? Her brow tightens, her jaw clenches, her lips pull back as she goes from mortification to rage and the splotches get bigger and darker. That didn''t last long. Wait. Some of my scales aren''t translucent. The ones with brown trim and blue trim kind of shimmer independently. Wait. What elements are those colors? A heavy breath and I remember the angry wimble keeper. "Big on blame, not on shame?" I quip and she rears back and punches me. Excuse me? There''s a sharp snapping sound. A pause and now she''s screaming. Who''s going to help her? I won''t. I wake up to her playing with my body, call her out, and she breaks her hand belting me. I don''t think I''ll apologize. I didn''t know I wasn''t a wimble. I still don''t know what a wimble is! I shrug then slap her for good measure. Now she''s collapsed on the other side of the room. Do I feel better now? No... She didn''t slap me. She punched me. After playing with my unconscious body after getting mad at me for not knowing what I was and almost killing her because she was being an idiot. But if I punch her she''ll die. Why am I assuming I didn''t kill her already? I sigh and climb off of the flat surface before turning to look at it. I shrug and start poking around. It''s a solid frame wooden cot with some rough woven cover and a thin mat. I stand up, relaxed with my fists on my hips when someone opens the door behind me. Oh. Was it locked? I look over my shoulder and Heran''s looking at me in... is that frustration or amusement? -*Both, you psycho,*- they shake their head before looking at the collapsed Lana. -*You said you wanted to apologize and we weren''t sure why but figured it couldn''t hurt.*- They let out a snort before turning back to me. -*Yeah, no, you look nothing like a wimble so you probably mutated a lot before they even pulled you out of the ground. They just told people you were a wimble instead of a beetle. You''re a beetle, not a moth, by the way.*- What the fuck? Even the emperor can''t figure out what the hell I am? Or is he trolling me? I think back over the weird interactions we had for the brief moment I was in their presence. I''m not important enough to troll. I narrow my eyes as Heran just watches me. And I know they know what I''m talking about and I also know they''re not going to tell me or they would. -*Nah, I''m just messing with you,*- they wave me off while grinning cheekily. -*You''re a treasure beetle, a void bug, and they know it. Remember when you got baked in the garden as a grub? That messed up your mutation. Your wing cover is soft. You''re supposed to have two wing covers then four membranous wings. You got six wings because the wing cover got borked. No clue what happened that made you hairy and scaly, but you''re the ugliest treasure beetle ever.*- Between them trolling me, Lana''s righteous indignation, finding out there''s a subplot the emperor is using me to trick, my weird mutations, and my kids being cheeky yet forthcoming, I think I''m just gonna head back to sleep. I turn back to the cot and climb on it as Heran squeals and tries to get me to stop even though I''m pretty sure they could probably slam me through the wall at this point. Dem bebes stronk. Settled on a Cover, Book Two available for Sale Working cover for Spoiled II until I get good Kisandera has to take the entry exam, and pass, in order to be accepted as a student. Disciple. Cultist. This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience. Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour Third Book in Spoiled Series Work in progress on title and cover Kisandera has to get to the emperor to learn more about the world and not be such an ignorant numpty about what''s possible and the basics of wuxia, xianxia, xuanhua, and RPGs in general. Reading is required. Releasing chapters for spoiled II on RR, when spoiled drops off of KU going to repost chapters. Thanks for the support of everyone who read, reviewed, commented, and rated on RR, and for the reads on KU and purchases on Amazon. B2 Chapter Three What is my luck? I sigh through my nose and sit on the cot with Heran plopping beside me as I look away from them and Lana and up at the crossbeams along the ceiling. I''ve mutated, again, and I don''t know if it''s a good sign or a bad sign. I''m definitely not passing for hunan anymore. I''m already regretting this. I take a deep breath and turn to Heran, bracing myself for the nonsense that''s going to ensue from asking them any questions. -*Yeah, no, we pushed you really hard so we could heal Madame Director as soon as possible, and, while you didn''t fall back a realm, we kinda borked you.*- I raise my hands, palms up, begging the universe for help. Again with that word. Is that the word of the day? Why do you keep saying "borked"? -*Iono,*- they shrug and I swear they''re drunk. I get a cold chill when it occurs to me that maybe they''re acting punch drunk because they''re overworked and stressed. They are my children after all. "Sweetie, I need you to focus, okay?" I say slowly and only get mild interest in return. Fuck. "When''s the last time you and the others had a good rest? Last I remember we were running ourselves ragged trying to catch up to Shimmering Steel. The lady I call Madame Director? The one that I consider impossible because she never has down time? Have you lot been trying to keep up with her?" "Ah, they''re tired." Speak of the devil. Wrong world. Madame Director walks into the room with a slight frown. "They''ve been getting sloppy lately and I wasn''t sure if it was rebellion or incompetence. You''ve been down for three days and they haven''t rested for quite some time. They keep watch while you sleep." "Okay, so I''m the asshole," I roll my eyes. I''m going to gather my kids and hide them somewhere for a few days. I push myself to my feet and wait for Adonia and Maru to acknowledge my plan. "What happened to Lana?" Madame director goes steely, face going hard, frown turning into something with weight to it and her hands falling to her sides, relaxed and ready. Shit. She''s in battle mode. "I woke up and she was just pushing my hip over and over. I thought she painted me and was messing with me in my sleep. She got offended and punched me so I slapped her," I shrug and feel something moving around inside my chest. I jump and look around, trying to figure out what''s going on. It''s not solid, it''s more a feeling of possible movement. What is this? I turn to Heran who just looks wistfully at the cot they''re sitting on and Maru and Adonia haven''t said anything yet. Shit. They''re probably down somewhere. "My kids are unresponsive," I tell Madame Director while taking off my pants and storing them in my bank. As soon as I can I need to shift. I have to get them someplace quiet. -*Where are Adonia and Maru?*- -*Maru collapsed at my desk and started punching out in their sleep. That''s why I came to check on you,*- Madame Director spins and starts marching away. I squat on Heran''s right, back to them as I pull their right arm over my right shoulder, and, with prayers of gratitude to whomever it concerns, pull them onto my back without pulling their arm free. I quickly shuffle after Madame Director hoping she''s going to check on Maru while Heran shuffles around to get comfortable while complaining about my scales. I can feel them being pulled the wrong way, like a hair being pulled, but they''re more resilient and a lot easier to ignore when my babies are in danger. There''s a group of people trying to put down demonic, non-hunan entities. I''ve been cleared. My demon essence spawnlings have not. Heran snores, which means I do. Probably worse. I don''t know what noise I make but Madame Director looks back at me then takes one step that carries her to the end of the hall before looking back at me. What the fuck did she just -- can I transfer in this form? I stop dead in my tracks, head lowered, tilted to the side, and I don''t know what I look like but Madame Director comes back. Okay. Doing bug stuff in not bug form messes me up, but I''m closer to bug form now. Still more hunan than bug, maybe, but it should be easier, right? But how do I do it? I wanted to get to them last time. But I need them here. I''m not sure what I did but when I thought of "I need them" my head started hurting and it''s getting worse. But I do. I need them here so I can take care of them. It''s my turn. I''m nauseous, my head hurts, and I don''t know where I am. I drop, kneeling with Heran on my back before something crashes into us. A figure slides to the ground on my left and they look behind themself at me. It''s Adonia looking shellshocked. But where are we? My head snaps to the left and I know Maru''s here, too. "Ow!" I shout while looking at her. She doesn''t look tired. She looks ill. Did she fall over punching me? "Fuck, are you sick?" "What are you doing, brat?" she spits, drooling on herself. My head cocks and I look up at her with all the judgement. This bish is blasted. -*You''re so tired you can''t even send. Where can I take you guys where no one will mess with you so you can sleep. Or recover. Regenerate? Congeal. Imma call it congeal.*- A single tired ha from Adonia and they''re out. Maru frowns at them in disapproval before laying down and passing out. I let out a laugh before sliding Heran off my back. I move a little bit away and shift into my void bug, not moth, fugly beetle form, -- yeah, I''m sticking with void bug, -- I lay over them and pick them up in my arms and legs before I remember their badges. -*You guys have your badges on? I''m taking us to the burning forest,*- I murmur to them and they''re barely responsive. I select Madame Director''s icon. Lucky this transferred over. -*Do you know where they''re keeping their badges? They''ll need them.*- -*Wait,*- she orders and I hear the snap and feel the "stay" point placed under me. This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience. I shield down and turtle up, reinforced while I wait. I''m slowly nodding off when something slams into the outside of my shield and I retaliate with Scale Cloud before I realize it''s Madame Director. I reach out and pull her into the space below me with whatever transfer is in this form, -- why does the same skill feel so different?-- and she''s got her arms up over her eyes and mouth. A quick headbutt to get her attention and she looks around while glaring. She ignores me, shuffling around and setting badge to chest on my kiddies before I even realize that she has room to move. And I can see them. And my legs are curled under me but my wings are embedded in the ground. What the fuck? The space under my wings is too big. It looks like I''m hanging near the ceiling in a small room. My kids have room to stretch out and Madame Director has room to walk among them -- -This space is too big,- and I''m freaking out. -*This is your void space, or part of it,*- Madame Director looks back and up at me like I''m fucking with her by stating the obvious. She gave me the same look, albeit briefly, when I told her that I consumed things. -*Terrible technique. Dig up your wings and you can be flipped right over. Terrible way for you to sleep. Not secure at all.*- Guess I don''t just groom myself in my sleep. Kinda alarmed that someone flips me over and when I''m on my back I just start grooming like I''m not about to be murdered, but that''s not for now. Scratch that, I''m about to drag my kids off into a deadly forest in the hopes that no one bothers us. -*How do I make it better?*- I need to know. I don''t need the attitude. She doesn''t have to roll her eyes, I''m trying to do better. -*I don''t know how to make a void space, you''re the void bug, you figure it out,*- she whisper hisses at me while shouting in my mind. -*Broken void bug because somebody let me cook in the sun as a grub,*- I snipe back. -*A little help would be nice.*- Hit ''em where it hurts. Apparently that wound''s still sore and little Miss Perfect isn''t quite so perfect after all. I wonder if I can knock her out and make her take a break, too? -*You''ll ruin my cultivation if you do that,*- she frowns, relaxing slightly. -*I keep moving, I keep hardening, I keep flowing, I keep improving. Rolling Steel cultivation style. I made it but I''m not ready to pass it on. Still needs work...*- -*Impressive, I''m sure,*- sounds awful, -*and we''ll count on you to keep us safe. I don''t know anything about void bugs, or wimbles, or treasure beetles, and none of that seems to apply to me.*- -*It''s like your mutations were guided by the thoughts of people around you,*- she looks back at me. And she looks haunted. -*There are mimcs and demons that can do such things. Fairies, greater spirits and lesser gods. I still don''t know if you''re a blessing or a curse.*- -*Or I could just be a desperate mother asking for your help in protecting my children,*- I''m tired and I know I''m going to go to sleep and wake up hungry. I''m already so hungry. -*I need to take them to the forest. I need them to be safe. They need sleep. Can you survive fire essence?*- She whips her head around giving me a suspicious glare, sizing me up over her shoulder. -*Fire essence? For what?*- I can hear the bark and bite and demand in her voice. She''s ordering an explanation. Does she never stop giving orders? Even her suggestions are orders and threats of punishment. -*Scale trees. Um. Dragon something trees. They''re fire and I can eat them. This will clear out the trees and give them a safe space to hide. Adonia should be fine but the others will be hurt without their badges. Will you be safe there?*- What the hell? The way she''s lighting up and slowly beaming at me you''d swear I offered her a trip to -- no, wrong world. She''s glowing up at me with the happiest smile I''ve seen from her. A genuine smile. -*I don''t understand.*- Should I run? -*Fire element hot enough to heat metal? This place is excellent for my cultivation,*- she says teasingly while gently poking one of my folded legs playfully. Did someone replace Madame Director? Did I just let a body double near my babies? -*You offered her a vacation where she can work on cultivating not working,*- Maru grumps. -*Shut up and take it.*- Um. ''Kay. I spread my arms and legs in an attempt to help me visualize reaching out and pulling, shifting our spot in this world so that we''re in or around the scale tree forest. Cinnamon and sweetness, syrupy heat, sound of sizzling, peanut brittle and quiet all in an orange glow. We''re here and this place feels more familiar than it has any right to. Did I stay here longer than anywhere else? I was here for days, awake, and I''ve left and come back again, more than once. This isn''t home but I doubt I could find the nursery where I spent supposed months half as easily. Everyone here? All four icons are lit. Good. -*I''m going to raise my wings, now,*- I warn them before following actions to thoughts. -*Everyone fine or cooking?*- -*We''ll dump the badges on you, Adonia wants to cycle, shut up and let us sleep,*- Maru grumbles, snuggling into the steaming earth and going back to sleep. -*You good?*- I turn to face Shimmering Steel who stands, eyes closed and arms held like she''s casually holding up an invisible pot over her belly button. Palms up, fingertips nearly touching, wrists bent awkwardly, elbows slightly out to her sides, and a weird shining dark grey and bright orange swirling storm forming in the heart of that invisible pot. Guess she''s good. One hand sweeps forward and over and she''s now holding an invisible ball that has a core of dark silver and glowing orange swirling in a vertical storm''s eye. I squeak as I get a notification that I''ve successfully consumed a Dragon Tail tree before shuffling off in embarrassment. Dinner and a show. Three days? Nah. One very long one. Time to get back to work. It''s weird how this place is supposed to be overgrown but everything still looks orderly. Who said that the trees sprout from the roots not that the trees spread out roots? Or am I misremembering that. Either way it''s very convenient that someone bred a plant that self-propagates in orderly rows that lets me knock down one tree without having to worry about getting pinned under a chain reaction of felled trees. And they don''t taste half bad, either. Pierce turns to Double Stab, a quick Lacerate to get the roots off for later, and then I figure I should head to the outskirts and then just pull up the roots like a carpet, let the trees fall, then cut them loose. Could also start stacking the trunks together. What do the leaves taste like? I honestly don''t remember. Everything was just spicy. But candy spicy not all the chiles spicy. Definitely not Maiden''s Blush spicy. Four trees down, four roots and crowns, Maru curses me out, and I drag a tree through the woods while singing, screaming, and knocking the trunk against the still standing trees. Am I being quiet enough for you to sleep? I sit down, not bothering to collect or siphon and just go through my bank. Oh, wait, didn''t I used to have some mounts? Well, corpses. Can you cook and eat spirit beasts as a hunan? Probably have to make sure the essence is compatible. Weren''t they eating fish? Saint fish? Or heavenly fish... Think I was awake for one of them. Was pretty good... I feel my eyes widen and I turn to my stack of tree trunks. Can I cut off rounds and use them as campfires? How long do they retain essence? I thought they generated essence... How does that work? Where''s the energy come from? B3. Chapter One Persephone flies off to retrieve Scrying Screen while I''m staring at my fist wondering when we decided to punch the man and the world shifts. Um. Wait. She didn''t get back with my artifact yet. I go to pull her to me, feel another shift, and she''s clinging to the mirror, stone-faced. She lands, I collect, then she shakily walks over, wrapping her arms around my leg. Wow. She got left behind and I barely had enough will left to drag her over. I sit down, ready to take a nap, and I smell the familiar smoke of my plaque changing. When I look at it it''s no longer just engraved wood. It''s got a lovely black lacquer, the color of the wood showing through on the lettering, and there''s even some blue highlights to it. Aw, did they customize it? Or is this supposed to match my artifact? "Mom..." Mom my ass... Heran looks mortified. "You know these exams are being recorded... Why would you punch an instructor?" "Why did the instructor try to rob an exam taker?" I retort. How the hell are you going to admonish me. Didn''t you watch the exam? "Donating artifacts, or being asked to... It''s considered an honor..." Adonia sighs. "Is it considered an honor to be eaten and turned into treasure? I''ll poop out a nice bit of silk for his efforts later," I snark. I don''t know why they think they have room to talk. I''m sitting cross-legged on the ground at Group B''s rally point. The stage is gone, as are most of the people who passed and got accepted, and my kids are here. Trying to tell me off. For things I shouldn''t have done. No praise for the things I''d done. "Kisandera? Congratulations on your excellent work. You''ve ranked as one of the top ten entrants and are allowed to participate in the Rankings in three months. You''re also allowed to take on a teacher to be your personal mentor. Don''t forget to head to the Student Store to pick your prize, and the Vault for your reward of spirit stones. Well, your children are quite knowledgeable, I''m sure they can help you," an elder walks up, disgorges exposition, interrupts themselves part way through, then walks off with a friendly smile. "I''m sure they''d love to help themselves to me," I grumble, arms crossed, and Maru and Shimmering Steel glare down at me. "Hand over the artifact so that we can put it in the vault," Shimmering Steel holds out her hand and I can feel my hair gaining body and volume. "We''ll sell it at a later date once we''ve got serious bidders." "It''s not for selling. It''s so that other people can help clear miasma zones," I say slowly, calmly and clearly. "We don''t need other people, we have you!" Shimmering Steel stares at me wide-eyed like I''d forgotten the abuse and she''s more~ than willing to remind me. "I''m not going to do that any more," I smile thinly. "I''ve gotten sick and almost died too many times." "It''s not up to you," she rolls her eyes. "It''s for the sake of Thousand Valleys. We all make sacrifices." "This is clearly not a democracy," I mumble, resisting the urge to flick my antenna although they twitch. I pull out Scrying Screen, wondering how serious she is. It''s my first artifact, a useful tool that takes on many jobs at once, and she''s going to sell it? It got me first place in an exam and it''s just a souvenir? I''m not even on some "mom won''t put my drawing on the fridge" bullshit. That thing has to be worth a fortune and she''s going to sell it? For what? I doubt we''re hurting for money... Thousand Valleys is still a major produce producer unless they switched gears. She takes the Scrying Screen, eyeing me the whole time, then stores it in a spatial storage pin on her chest. Oh. I can see it. I look around and realize there are lots of things I''d seen but didn''t register. Everyone has multiple storage devices except for Persephone. She''s a lot calmer now that I''m not dead. Speaking of. I turn back to my kids with a frown. No one said a word about my reforging. Another rebirth to heal damage dealt and they''re like, "this is why we''re not going to stop working you"? Really? Think I''m gonna take a few years off to focus on my studies... I guess I narrowed my eyes or did something, because Madame Dictator narrows her eyes at me. Did she blink yet? Hmm... I kinda want to start grooming or spinning, but I''m on vacation. I''ve got to figure out this student stuff and head to the capital. Ooh. Oh. I''m still naked. I drag Persephone with me into my void space, walking over to the stored fabric, just enjoying the peace and quiet. -*Are they for real? You placed Top Ten, with no training, and they''re focusing on you punching out an instructor? The fact that he couldn''t dodge, and you stunned him, is praise worthy! You have no training!*- I give her a small smile and get to work. I like the look of the embroidered robes, but I also like the long robes. But I want to wear pants. So... Embroidered top, robe bottoms, and pants. "I don''t suppose you know how to make shoes?" I ask absently. It''s not important. I don''t have mouths on my feet any more, but I know that I can still stick to surfaces if I need to. I just know things now. While Persephone shakes her head and gives a small apology I wave her off and wonder what we''re going to eat for dinner. I still have a ton of fish in storage. There''s a few bodies, but apparently those should be crafted into things. Hmm... I look down at the robe top, the outer robe top and realize I need to make inner robes. [Textile Crafting Successful] [Qi Drained: -10] [Karma Gained: 100] [Current Qi: 4,176,048] [Current Karma: 36,758,203/49,071,033] Hmm? That''s back, again. I hold up the not so simple embroidered water and wind blend wrap top with air accents, yellow on blue on blue. I have no fashion sense but this should protect everyone while I''m collecting the emperor''s sneezes, right? Maru said they wore shielding clothing, is that to fire or anything in general? [Textile Crafting Successful] [Qi Drained: -10] [Karma Gained: 100] [Current Qi: 4,176,038] This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience. [Current Karma: 36,758,303/49,071,033] So why is this back again? I put on the upper under robe and try to throw the upper over robe over it before I realize I have a problem. I look down to double check, and, yeah. I''d only sewn two arms. Four arms total, but only two to a robe. I need twice that many. But, why though? I turn to ask Persephone why she gave me knowledge for two arms before noting that she only has two arms. Well. Nevermind. I sigh, removing the robes and her eyes widen in shock. -*Oh! You can''t use the recipes!*- she says, adorable with her little hands held up over her mouth as if she''s trying to catch the words. -*I can''t use the tops until I find out how sewing works, but I can still wear skirts and pants.*- I hope. How was I wearing --. Oh. Right. Literally ripping holes in the clothes and eating them. Or cutting off pieces and eating them. Eating the clothing in general. Did I rip all the sleeves off? Was I some armsy giga-chad? I have no fashion sense. All muscle shirts and no chill. Hmph. -*When are we going to get your rewards?*- Persephone huffs. Why''s she angry? Oh, right. I got into the zone making the clothing by hand like some kind of peasant, gasp!, and forgot all about the triplets and Madame Dictator. Maybe we can find her a hobby so she isn''t just sitting around when I take a break. "Do you know where any of that stuff is?" I ask her and she hesitantly puts a finger to her chin. "I could probably find a map or learn the layout of Seven Moons, but some of the zones are going to be out of reach because access is restricted," she informs me and I realize that, while she is another cheat, she''s not blatantly pretending I can just look up the information on my own if I think about it. If she can learn it in five minutes, me taking five weeks to figure out where to start and where to go is a waste. I''m not sure why the others don''t see it that way. "Is there a way for me to give you permission? I''m pretty sure people get sent on errands all the time, how do they get around to areas they can''t normally go in?" "Good point," she mumbles, one arm crossed, a finger to her chin and her head bowed as she frowns at the ground. Mini thinker. "Apologies for all the questions, but do you also happen to know what runes are used in forging? If I can make such valuable artifacts, surely there are buyers." I''m not gonna try to become a merchant, but the world runs on money. And Qi. And Karma. There''s a warmth and I start collecting, wondering how Thousand Valleys is attacking me when I''m paused before I hear a familiar snort. -Get your rewards, don''t pick a location to stay yet, because you won''t be there long, then come to me. Or let me know when you''re ready. You don''t just need to learn about Qi and Karma and cultivation paths, you need to learn about xianxia, xuanhua fusion bastard! Never plays RPGs much? Peh!- [Textile Crafting Successful] [Qi Drained: -10] [Karma Gained: 100] [Current Qi: 4,176,028] [Current Karma: 36,758,303/49,070,933] I casually sewed robe bottoms, because pants, but trying to put them on doesn''t work. They''re too small. How do I readjust them? How do you size a crafting recipe?I don''t scrap them because I can probably sell them if this combo is half as popular as Mary''s requests for it are. -This isn''t some farming sim! This a progression series! Made it this far and moans about getting nerfed... Tch. Can''t wait to see what your heavenly tribulations look like... Probably be a bunch of tasteless rice cakes and water. Let''s see if you don''t pull down Heavenly Fire!- I sigh and just imagine how the clothing I make should look and feel based on what I''ve encountered so far. When I will the clothing into being I can feel the embroidery. Pretty sure that''s not right... I think there''s supposed to be a liner, right? As I reshape it I remember I made a crap ton of wind/death fabric I wanted to use. Sigh. -Never heard of horsetail whisks? Doesn''t know a strong cultivator can reshape the heavens? This is the mortal realm, not the earth realm, tch!- I put away the new clothes and try again with the wind/death but with water silk thread. The entire time the emperor is bemoaning my lack of, what? culture?, Persephone is sputtering with her hands clasped over her mouth. ''Cause of the Emperor''s "woe is me!" act or something else? -Just use binding wraps!- Script paper? For what? -Ack!- What''d I miss? -*The emperor was telling you to use strips of fabric to wrap up and cover your bits. How''d you get script paper out of that?*- She''s cackling, arms hugging her stomach, tears streaming from her eyes. Why does she have tear ducts? "They said binding," I point out and the world, my void space, shifts just a little. "Oy! Did you just facepalm so hard you bumped my void space?!" How''s that even possible? -Go grab your shit then get over here.- "Might take us some time to figure out where everything is." Unless he''s got some tips? -Ask a guard for directions.- One of the flying students? -Think of them as teacher''s aides or hall monitors. They''re not just lookouts.- Oh. Was wondering why the one sword guy abandoned his post to guide me and Modesty. Thought he was flirting with Modesty or just really didn''t want to do his route. Hm~. Will it be easier or harder to get help after punching out flip skillet? A little more futzing and I''ve got a semi-modest outfit. The top is slit vertically, front and back, but lightly overlapped to hide the break and the horrifying and useful vertical mouth eyes. A collar that ties closed at the back of my neck, instead of sleeves or a straight opening at my side I have streamers, broad strips of fabric that have broad tying bands at the wrist. My robe bottoms, over and under, are standard. They need no modifications. I''m using a standard rope belt made of death silk thread. I don''t have mouths everywhere else any more. Well, not real mouths. There are tribal demon mouths on both facial cheeks, and all of my shoulders, but those are covered by the loose pseudo sleeves. I haven''t had the inclination to check elsewhere, I''m just glad that I managed to remove some of my more off-putting mutations. And they think I''m going to let them talk me into that drake shit again? Peh! See if I don''t have the emperor remove Shimmering Steel as my master. They want to work me? They can pay me! Could they afford my services? I grumble, refreshing Persephone''s timer before walking back out. Fists clenched I keep an eye on everyone as I try to walk out of the mini shaming circle, Persephone in tow. "Where do you think you''re going?" Maru says quietly. Voice low and violent intentions worn openly. "To get my prizes," I say, eyes flickering in annoyance. Persephone is slowly coming down from whatever had her so tickled earlier. Now she''s doing her blank stare thing and slowly radiating hostility. Maru frowns, looks her up and down, then dismisses her with an eye roll before turning her attention back to me. "The reason she wasn''t getting along with anyone is because she was called when I was already on the verge of death and you guys weren''t letting up," I narrow my eyes to gauge their reaction. "She''s fine now that I''m fine except you guys still haven''t learned to stop." Adonia rolls his eyes and opens his mouth, insect mouth parts coming into view and a snapping buzz coming from his abdomen while his clothes snap and flutter. He immediately closed his mouth, horrified, and Maru fights a smile. "We''ll need to go over available prizes to see which ones will best help Thousand Valleys. You''ll also need to give us our permissions back." "Keep it up and I''ll leave," I say as calmly as I can. I win rewards for my hard labor and they want to know what they can get? The three worst offenders roll their eyes, scoffing, but only one of them doesn''t look guilty. B3. Chapter Two "Losing a few points of karma is no big deal," Shimmering Steel scoffs with a wave of her hand. This bitch didn''t even know about the emperor''s spycam. What else have they been keeping from her? "Nearly 210,000 karma. Not a few points," I point out and she doubles over, gagging. "The emperor has had to intervene on several occasions, and you keep pushing," I hiss, fists clenched and silk sparking. "The triplets can barely maintain hunan form anymore, because it relies on my will, not theirs." She blinks, turning to the triplets without straightening. Maru glares at me, Adonia looks like they''re about to be sick, and Heran, eyes closed, head tipped to the side, chuckles nervously. "You can''t maintain hunan forms?" She asks them directly. "One of the reasons I''m sick all the time is because they''ve been using my cultivation and my karma and my will. They work hard and stop getting stronger when I die, don''t they?" I ask quietly, realizing that they don''t just push, but that they were constantly draining me and pushing when I was too weak to stop them. -Stop being so dramatic,- Adonia buzz burbles. -You don''t die, you go into stasis.- He crosses his arms and looks away defiantly. -Heehee. The void bug that mutated to cheat death ? ,- the emperor cackles and I collect the fountain of energy. -A phoenix moth!- "Knock it off," I deflate. It feels like bug me is clinging to my back. I''m a heavy bish. "They''re never going to take it seriously because they have no idea how much it costs. They just pile up garbage, and, tada! Replacing my cultivation with garbage and wondering why I''m getting worst..." I go to leave and Maru steps in front of me. I don''t know what they intended to say, but when they open their mouth I punch them in it with an imperial phoenix aura powered fist. They pop, splattering like a paint filled balloon, and I keep walking. -*Persephone, I''ll need help,*- I turn to look and she''s staring at me in horror. -*I don''t know if you already have all the information, but, if you don''t, Heran might be able to fill you in.*- I wrap the stunned death moth in a Wimble bubble, and myself in a wind bubble, and launch myself into the sky, dragging her behind me. I''m angry and disgusted. I honestly have no idea what Maru was going to say, but Adonia had done so much worse without getting hit. I call Adonia to me, wavering as hunger and exhaustion start tearing at my vision. When he materializes I slash him diagonally, letting the goop that is him rain down. I''m not going to make it to Modesty''s much less be able to go on a shopping trip. I need food and rest. I can''t even warn Persephone as I drop the bubbles. They flicker and disperse, I can''t even collect the energies. We drop next. Or at least I do. Persephone screams, trying to catch me. I swear, put in a request to auto refresh her permissions, then jump us into storage. I pass out as she screams and the world goes red and gold. I wake up growling and screaming, clawing my way across a concrete floor. I groan, my head bouncing lightly as I go limp. Hungry. What happened? Well, why was I screaming? I pull a shrub out of my bank, stomach twinging before I tear into it. "There!" Modesty? I hear shouting and pounding footsteps and I don''t bother to raise my head. Anyone who tries anything is getting eaten. "Sandy!" I grunt and keep eating. "... Are you awake?" "Unfortunately,". I grumble, my stomach roars in response. Oh. Right. I shove the shrub in the front of my robes, my front eye mouth immediately eating while shouting threats. The fuck happened? I pull out another bush and take a bite. It doesn''t taste great and I wave it at Modesty. "Back, please." "Oh! Right." I don''t fight it as Modesty starts tugging my shirts to the side. I blink, see him shoving the shrub at me, and start eating when it''s in range. "Didn''t have enough food during the exam," I mumble and he starts stroking my hair. "That feels nice." The sound of people shouting variations of "it''s dangerous!" reduce in volume and frequency, but don''t die out completely. I sigh, too tired to be confused. "I''ll be back," he says gently before I hear him sprint away. "Where''s Seph?" I raise my antenna and wave them around, gathering tons of information, but still no Seph. I''m still tired, but I''m more hungry after my nap. Wait. How are they in my storage? I feel Golden Toilet walk on my grave, stop, and take a shit. A dose of adrenaline and I''m on my feet. I spin trying to get a bearing. There''s Modesty. Where''s everyone else? I feel Shimmering Steel and dismiss her. My mouths bellow, startling me, and I curse as I pull more plants out of the bank. My mouths curse back and I get into an argument with myself. Which is why I''m screaming threats and insults at myself when Modesty races over with a fabric bundle. I spin, lunging at him and tearing the thrifty packaging apart to get to the bundles of herbs and food within. I start cramming my mouths, Modesty still pinned beneath me, and he carefully shifts me to the side so I''m no longer straddling him. "Tch," I see him shake his head out of the corner of my eye. "They were worried that we wouldn''t be able to get you to take your medicine." "Medicine for what?" I ask shoving all the bundles of plant matter and various hunan foods into all of my various mouths. Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences. "You didn''t drop a cultivation level, but you''ve been like a corpse for a year." Modesty tosses a couple of loose items into my front eye mouth. Feeding the fire. "You fell and no one knows what happened to Persephone." He hesitates, stumbling over her name. Is it that unusual? "You''d attacked Maru and Adonia, then she disappeared, and you became unresponsive," Modesty pauses to accept another bundle from someone who stares at me. "What happened? I woke up screaming, and this kid is starting at me like he can''t believe I exist," I say loudly out the side of my mouth while making full eye contact with the kid in question. Modesty sighs and shoves food into my mouth eye, his hand partially disappearing inside of me. "Oy!" "Keep eating so you can recover," he admonishes me, and I''m impressed that I don''t start eating until his hand is clear. "We need you if we''re going to find Persephone." "Speaking of children..." I wait until he''s looking and take a bite of a hot bun with my eyebrows raised, holding the expression as I chew. "I don''t know whether to laugh or be horrified first," he says breathing, holding his breath and going very still. "I don''t know if I ate Persephone, but did you have your kid yet?" He sighs, shifting to face slightly away. I keep eating, slowing down as the silence drags on before it clicks. "Is he --," I point to the teen that had brought a bag of food and still hasn''t stopped staring at me. "Absolutely not!" Modesty bellows, making a chopping motion with his hand that sends the child sprinting away. "It''s been a year! Be serious!" I stare blankly at him, taking a bite and chewing slowly. "I''m 6, sterile with four kids, some weird mutation that doesn''t let me die, and shit luck that doesn''t let me rest," I swallow and take another bite, chewing it slowly. "How is this not serious?" I slowly glare at him as he laughs. Head back, eyes squinting, just letting it out at my pain. "Ass." "Sorry, sorry," he waves his hand, reduced to snickers and chuckles. He takes a deep breath, half his mouth pulling up in a sad, wry smile. "There are herbs for such things. We found a midwife in time to stop a child from taking root..." "Ooh," I cram the rest of the food in mouth, clapping lightly and bouncing on my heels as someone races over with another bag. "Why was I screaming?" Modesty thanks the delivery boy then swings around with a glare. He violently assaults the bag, throwing the edges back before sucking his teeth, his head snapping to the side. I slowly reach forward, grabbing a piece of food in each hand before withdrawing. "They had your body stored to absorb stray energy and some idiots tried to harvest you. You ate their seals, but were too weak to catch them. I was just asking about you when I heard your screams." "My corpse was stored in a warehouse so that they could use me like a filter?" I say slowly, my appetite ramping up at the idea of slaughter and the subsequent leftovers. "And someone tried to cut pieces off..." "Mm," Modesty nods, frowning and glaring lightly. I wonder if he''s staring at a memory or going over a check list. "Adonia... The triplets... Heran is the only one that looks vaguely human." Modesty sighs and I picture a dog-sized tube of goo with a motorized cookie cutter for a mouth in a white spotted pink bikini. I laugh. Picturing a shrieking goop tube with a business suit on makes me laugh harder. When Modesty asks what''s so funny I explain through my other mouths, alternating as I chew, still laughing uninterrupted. He looks amused and irritated, making me laugh harder, and then upgrades to exasperated. Sad, mad, exasperated, entertained and annoyed. Bingo! "You can stop explaining," he sighs, hanging his head. I''ve got a system so I can share now. On purpose. "Whose idea was it to use me, while I''m in critical condition, because I can always do more work?" I ask as carefully as I can. Don''t want to eat the messenger. Modesty grimaces, skin on his face tightening, lips pulling back from gums and teeth, body tensing, fists clenching and I figure it''s so bad that I really shouldn''t trust anyone in Thousand Valleys. "Imma check something real quick," I say, stuffing the foods I have in my mouth and grabbing armfuls to take with me. I walk into my void space, collecting a fine mist of sacred phoenix while shoving another bundle of herbs in my face and various other things in my chest and back. I remember my antenna being super twitchy, well, all of me being super twitchy, but now I''m pretty still as I spin to see what might have changed. That was a warehouse. This is my warehouse. "And never the two shall meet," I mumble before I spread my senses up, not just out. Persephone wails, flying down at me from where she''d hidden in the rafters, probably forced up there by the imperial cloud. "I was out for a year," I say as I squat, trying to see what''s still available and what she''s willing to eat. "Some of this is medicine. They were using my body as a filter in a warehouse. "Someone tried to harvest me. Modesty told me and brought foods, but they won''t say who did it." Persephone doesn''t say anything. Hasn''t said anything. She''s stopped wailing, but now she''s just clinging to me, shaking and sniffling. "I--. The emperor was here. What''d he say?" I ask, trying to figure out what in the hells I should do now. "You stopped moving, and then there was fire everywhere, and he said he had to leave so I''d be safe, but he approved the request for you, but I don''t know what that means," she tries to explain, voice hitting uncomfortably high ranges, but she''s got some of the information I needed. "I need to give approval for things to stay in my space without dying or being kicked. I tried to start it, I guess he finished it," I sigh, slumping with eyes closed, holding her tightly. "Thank you..." "Your void is in stasis unless you''re in here," Persephone pauses, taking a deep shuddering breath. "I was only here half an hour. The Emperor kept checking on me --." "Fucking how?" Where the fuck are his permissions? -*''Cause I outrank you, beh! When you have your own empire, you get to decide what I do when I''m in it. Until then...*- he chimes in cheerfully. "Oh, you beautiful bastard, thank you!" I sag in relief, collapsing onto the floor. -*Thought about setting up auto collect when I talked through you, but your buddies are... They''re dicks. You need better friends,*- he says offhandedly and I wonder what he saw. -*Some pretty standard stuff, actually.*- "Couldn''t you request my body or something?" I ask. If the emperor demanded my body, and could check up through me --. Wait. How in the hells did they try to harvest me? I guess the emperor has other stuff to keep track of, but why''d I wake up? "Hello?" They haven''t answered my question. Did they change focus or is this one of those "figure it out for yourself" things? -*The life of a cultivator is full of danger where your safety is never guaranteed,*- the emperor says sagely. -*Now get better, get your shit, and get over here!*- This guy--. -*Have lots of adventures on the way, ''kay, bye~ ?, *- he titters and I know he''s gone. Or at least sitting back to enjoy the show. -*Don''t suck!*- "Ah! Food, rewards, then GTFO," I say outloud, cramming my face with things Persephone sets off to the side. "Let''s get out of here and find some guards." Persephone lets out a small sound of disappointment or acknowledgment. Or apprehension. We have to run the gauntlet of entitled family and heartless employers. "Lemme check the logs real quick..." I mumble, eyes narrowing in a glare. Persephone whimpers and I sigh. "I''m pissed and sickened at the same time. Not a nice feeling..." When I get to the log book I make sure I''m sitting comfortably, then look back and double check that I ate all the food, Persephone nibbling on a single sprig of something, and then I look around to see if I can see anything out of place in the chaos. "Stop stalling," Persephone screeches, and I nearly tip out of the chair. I blush in embarrassment and turn to the thick three ring binder. Spoiled! Series Update Spoilers, question mark? Books 1-2 of the Spoiled! series -- that''s what I''m calling it--, The Spoiled Master Wanted a Pet and The Spoiled Class Pet, will be discounted from October 1-8. Spoiled! 3, The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour, -- the thought behind the title is he''s meeting a bunch of hangers-on during his inadvertent tour of the Empire, not that she''s the Spoiled Sycophant, so no hyphen. Yes, should probably name it The Spoiled Imperial Sycophants Tour, and I am honestly considering it, -- will be going to AmazonKU in October. Spoiled! 4, The Entitled Imperial Pet, -- going back to the Spoiled thing but in a new zipcode, a different set of politics and a rival empire, what? -- will start a new set of Spoiled, -- same series, Sandy''s not as amazing to these people -- and will be posted to RR starting on October 1st. So 1-3 is in the Kingdom of the Rising Sun. Book 3 is not in the Kingdom of the Rising Sun. The Imperial Sacred Phoenix Kingdom. The Sacred Imperial Phoenix Kingdom? The Little Emperor Kingdom. Spoiled! III will be taken down from Patreon, Spoiled! IV been up, and already published to Amazon. No clue when I''ll get started on Spoiled! V, been working on Essence, which was started as a RR challenge story. More Spoilers! This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it. Essence of Existence ??Slice of Life (lots of interpersonal relationship stuff. She is be minor and am has family?) Don''t worry, she doesn''t talk like that. She is a wordy fuck though. And she doesn''t swear. I do. Gasp? ??Magical Girl (transformations but they aren''t cute or pornographic unless wolfing out is your kink) ??Dungeon (not just instanced dungeons, those are traps) Synopsis: ??9-12 yr old kids go out into the woods and are promptly slaughtered ??Oh, and magic isn''t nonsense like she was raised to believe. It''s real, good luck figuring it out! Cue Run, bitch! Run! ??Lots of internal girl-splaining/rants and time doesn''t pause ??MC learns that they''re special, which means there is no set training regimen because she shouldn''t exist. They''d tested for magic, didn''t find hers, then found out later why. Because they didn''t test for it. Oops? ??MC is overpowered but has misfires that everyone "knows" how to fix but isn''t sure how to teach her because of above Maggie goes on what''s supposed to be a trek through the woods, camping, puzzle solving, and other critical reasoning exercises, learning magic is real when she and others witness one of the other children being killed and eaten by imaginary creatures. She then learns that, not only is she not human, (she really isn''t. This isn''t a story where she finds out that one of her ancestors might have been a friend to some non-human sentient creature so she can be edgy-- wait what?), but nobody''s sure how she is what she is or what to do about it.?? So she has to come to terms with what she is, remind herself that, despite what she was raised to believe, there is no magic, there is only humans with too much imagination, magic is real, and it''s her problem now.?? Another OP MC doesn''t automatically reach god-tier who faces problems because of how powerful they are and how little they know how to use it. No one will get a reference to Ken fucksploding but I''m still gonna make it anyway.?? Cue squid-baby. ??Nailed it.?? Spoiled Life Just a reminder that volume three is coming down and going up on AmazonKU tomorrow. At that time volume four chapters will begin posting. Several other stories, not Kissy related but there is some crossover, are also going to AmazonKU for anyone interested in dipping their toes into any of my other unpopular stories. Any time a new Spoiled! book goes up the rest of the series gets discounted, so there''s that. This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings. Just a reminder that volume three is going to be stubbed on Royal Road and put up on AmazonKU on the first of October. At this time the other KU volumes will be discounted. There are also other stories on KU if you''d like to branch out into some more wordy nonsense where MC doesn''t get to suck then come back years later as a badass. You will see them trip on the curb and eat shit. You will see them take something out of the package and throw the item away then wonder wtf. You will see them set reminders for five minutes and remember them days later. Just a reminder. Author is into some tedious shit. Enjoy XD Spoilers but not *** This rant will continue to grow. This is not a "See Spot run. Run, Spot, run. Spot likes to run. Spot runs everywhere." book series. Outside of being wordy and descriptive. This is a: "what the dog doing?" MC watches a dog sprinting, eyes wide and tongue lolling. Does no one else see this? "Hmm," someone follows MCs line of sight and sees the dog disappear down the street. "Oh, that''s Spot. That dog has way too much energy." series. Same thing. Things will happen. You''re reading what is happening not being told what to think or feel. You get to decide that for yourself. You want to encourage Spot? Go for it. You don''t give a fuck about Spot? Cool. There will be cultivation and progression clich¨¦s. MC does not know them. If you don''t know them you will miss them. If you do know them, keep an eye out for "easter eggs". MC learns about the shiz later. And sometimes forgets. Because there is a lot~. ? And they didn''t ask for this so fuck it~ ? Then over to oh, shit, that was important? *** First off: First book is stubbed. Out of over 400 pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! (And tables to the best I could manage) only, maybe 3-4 chapters are on RR. But, gasp!, it says 15 chapters! Out of over 400 pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! Maybe 3-4 chapters are on RR. (Let''s say 3-7. For breathing room purposes.) The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" stuff is. And those chapters are marked B2. For Book 2. And on the fiction page they should have a nifty little section with a different cover. That''s what some of those weird cover chapters with images were about. Because: The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" For those of you who got it the first time, this is for the people in the front who tuned out then went "hey! No one acts like MC!" Correct. Book 2 is more cultivation and progression than litrpg. But this is a series. These things come and go and there''s a ranking system. An actual ranking system within the system, and, depending on what you rank in, or with whom, you will have access to nifty stuff. Being the emperor''s friend is much better than owning your own house. Because it''s the emperor of the empire versus a piece of property somewhere within said empire. -.- We good? Cool. If not? I don''t know what to tell you. I''m trying not to Chronicles of Riddick you. The second version. I''m all over the simple one where you get to figure out the story yourself, not the extended versions where they have random chick in fur bikini tell you everything up front and keep repeating it over and over ruining every twist and turn. And then recapping to make sure you''re not enjoying yourself. ALL the spoilers. But not really, because these parts are already published. For the entire fookin'' published series. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) Posting this as a separate comment because it''s not the first time I answered this, but people keep deleting their comments after I explain. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) I swear some of the reviews were written to help explain the things so people wouldn''t be confused. And then there''s another comment! That mysteriously disappears, ''cause fack all the time I spend answering and anyone else who might have the same question. And gonna make this a separate chapter, I suppose. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) /Synopsis/Recap Literally the leader of the empire goes, oh neat, there''s another god tier person here. Then wtf is this because he doesn''t understand wtf Kisandera is doing grooming and making silk and eating garbage. MC is ignorant of the way things work. Other people are taking advantage of that. Or they think it''s just some OP treasure/bot with nonsensical, poorly programmed reactions. I tried to make this clear without just saying it based on how other people aren''t taking MC serious despite all the weird shit they can do. Their reactions and responses verbal and non-verbal. Fail, I guess. I even put it in the book description... WTF. Their attacks and the things they use the most keep updating and evolving. They keep unlocking new shit. They started/used to, then turned them off, then lost access/just don''t get personalized notifications or know how to access the notification system, and then they lost permission to do it at will. I rambled about this. In book. Without the exact phrasing because MC doesn''t know the shiz exists. You as the reader might, the other characters hint that they do, MC doesn''t. MC is literally that one person who plays a game, says it''s garbage, doesn''t know what they''re doing, refuses to check the wiki because all the stuff should be in game already, lucks into some amazing bullshit, then you find out later they didn''t know they could use a backpack. Or that there''s a skill list. Or waypoints. Or a reputation shop. Or any of the things that make the game playable. Hell. A crafting interface. MODESTY keeps telling them how much OP dragonshit they keep doing, tries to get over the envy, then tries to explain to Kisandera that there''s a lot of stuff they need to pay attention to that they''re not even looking at. There''s a tutorial. That''s how everyone else knows this basic shit. Kisandera keeps timing out of it by SLEEPING while they cycle. The closed door cultivation is a thing. The gaining insight while meditating is a thing. Sometimes they stumble on new insights while rambling in their head, but there''s a fully interactive world the triplets are getting access to and learning from that Kisandera is managing to avoid. The whole "we can see it when you see it" then kIsandera going wow, how are they learning all this shit? Then napping some more. If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it. This is why the system is trolling them. It is personal. At one point in time they learned how to silence the notifications or set them to important only. Then ignored them. On purpose. And called them annoying. Then started moping ''cause they didn''t know how to get them back. They didn''t mute them. They got turned off. They have to turn them back on again. They''ve barely got an understanding of how permissions work. The miasma thing is a character alteration item with a 90% chance to pull a "wish granted". It''s why people avoid the shit out of it. You want radiant skin? Congratulations, you''re radioactive. When they (Kisandera) keep mutating it''s because their idle thoughts of "I want to be able to do this turn" into "congrats, you''ve unlocked". There''s a 10% chance you''ll get what you want, and a 1% chance you''ll get it the way you want it. Yes, this is a reference to loot boxes and shitty RNG when they lie about the chances of you getting a super rare item. Back to MC doing something they''ve been doing and it suddenly changes. That''s them unlocking a new version of the skill. And it takes them by surprise because they can''t access notifications. Sometimes they remember, most of the time they just think it''s a hiccup. Miasma doesn''t change skills, it only changes appearance. Dude wants tiger hands. Chance he''ll just grow harder nails, chance he''ll get human hands that look like tiger paws but aren''t, chance his hands will get stronger and look tiger-y and be tiger-y, chance he''ll actually get anthro tiger hands that are super awesome. Then he''ll have access to developing tiger claw attacks, doesn''t just give them. Miasma doesn''t give him access to the skills. Having the claws and learning to use them will. What else to rant about? MC loses access to their logs but other people can still access them. The logs are there. Will always be there. Whether or not the Kisandera loses permission to go to them doesn''t affect other people''s permissions to access them. Back to trolly system thing. There is the option to just know what''s in the logs versus searching for lines, or looking at spreadsheets, what? you can change view? even into lists?, but there''s also the option to integrate the logs into memory. MC does this almost instinctively, bug instinct hack, with things they eat, hence gaining rip off spider abilities or dragon scale. MC could produce silk already, MC is a moth thing with hair and scales, eating them didn''t unlock the skill so much as having the tools available already and learning a new way to use them. So could eat dragon, no scales? no dragon scale skills. Want breathe fire? No fire essence? no breathe fire for you! MC started off with a spatial realm that they thought was just a spatial storage/bank, the box inventory interface was a display of what was in the space not the space itself. When they went into the outer space starry galaxy area and built a storage facility, that was them actually building into the spatial realm. Spatial realm is like the in game housing system where you take a portal to a private area you can customize. To a point. Kisandera uses essence and "materials" from things they''ve eaten. They can also make shit if they have the right materials for it. They can convert essence into materials. They can''t make things without getting a certain amount of it and knowing what it is. So no meteor/star metal weapons just because. Funny thing is the tutorial had some bootleg copies to impress students with enough in all the tools gathered to actually make a nugget of star metal to start actually producing it but nobody knows that yet XD. Those flying black weapons that kisandera stole weren''t just steel. They were just mostly steel. Which isn''t all steel. Exam spoilers!! Inside the exam where there was a field of flowers that come from different places and have different elements and if you get too close or interact directly with them you get affected by them are gathering points for all the loot of all the students that died. The blue crystal kisandera found is concentrated Qi. Crystalized Qi. What from the people who dead and the plants. Cycles Qi in the area helping it be the psychotic mishmash it is without turning into a miasma dense hellscape. They find several jade stones. Storage stones, that are all the jade storages that were dumped during the exam. People with permission, instructors sent to retrieve so and so''s storage because their clan/family paid for it to be returned, can break off pieces of it with storage intact. Kisandera wasn''t supposed to be able to see the treasure piles and ends up just stealing them which increased their rank ''cause obviously they''re not common to be able to pull that shit off. Yes, this will piss off a lot of people who will try to subtly make things worst for Kisandera. Kisandera used a waypoint they didn''t know about. The shortcut in the trap house? That''s a maintenance tunnel to help reset the traps. Their OP void accessing permissions let them access spatial shit. Period. They have a built in master key/transport pass. Bug them knows this. They them do not. Bug them is a fookin'' insect and unable to communicate other than to do or not do. Kisandera is an unobservant, non-animal friendly person who just goes, oh, ew, why''d I do that? So, moving on... This is a slice of life series. A long running, from birth to finish, (Godhood? You really think so?), story about a person who was reborn into a place they have no concept of. As far as everyone else in the world is concerned their lack of knowledge, or very specific limited knowledge, makes them a talking treasure. Not even an NPC. A chatty tool. The other characters aren''t NPCs. The NPCs are the one-offs stuck in a loop. You will notice them if you''re looking for them. They don''t do much, are highly specialized, and they don''t do much else. It''s easy to know where they''ll be and what they''ll be doing. Some people will try to live that NPC life, merchants and cozy lovers, but then they get home and take the costume off. Am I going to tell you who they are? Nope. Can you guess? If you want. Will you be right? Sometimes. A routine doesn''t equal a script. There''s a difference. Questions? Ask away. Just... Don''t delete the comment after I answer because that gets rid of the answer, too. Other people might be stuck on the same question. Imagine a world without wikis and FAQs. And you will be the MC. Repeated for your enjoyment. AmazonKU or The Spoiled Series Life You are now in Book IV(4) The Entitled Imperial Pet Unless the title changes TL;DR Section: ?? Snarky MC that thinks like a comment section, refuses to read, and didn''t play the tutorial, trapped in someone else''s dream life with absolutely no interest in playing along, much less being nice about it ?? When relationships aren''t will they won''t they but people trying not to kill each other because it''s polite. ?? Author enjoys solo-playing Wurm (Online/Unlimited) **unmodded**, watching extras in movies for that one who''s EXTRA, and always wonders what happened in those two years where MC went from ignorant to badass. You have been warned. Nice people left reviews. Read them for a heads up. Affiliate/Amazon links for my shiz when I remember. I only get paid when someone buys MY books or subscribes on Patreon. I am broke but I like reading my stories XD Series on Amazon and AmazonKU Kindle Unlimited Deal Offer Anniversary Birthday Wedding ??The Spoiled Master Wanted A Pet Spoiled Book I Stubbed on RR for AmazonKU First few chapters on RR Random nonsense on Patreon Mostly art and ramblings, will be added to over time Story of a clueless slacker waking up in another world as a giant grub with a ridiculous name and a list of tasks no one told them. All they want is to be left alone, but there''s work to do and they''ve been volun-told to do it but not how it''s done. Being a rejected Gift to a high ranking family is hard. -I went to take a nap on my 15 minute break and when I woke up I was being manhandled into a cage! -Now I''m a pet for some spoiled brat in a world where magic is real. -"Pet", your face! Let me out!- ??The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour II Renamed The Entitled Imperial Treasure Spoiled Book IV Available for purchase on Amazon; Will be scheduled in October on RR after Book III goes to AmazonKU; After Book IV is finished posting on RR and up for a few weeks in its entirety it''ll be taken down and posted on to AmazonKU after a few weeks; Hopefully Book V will begin posting at that time Kisandera continues their imperially decreed quest to "Get Gud", but runs into a few snags once they make it to their first town. -How are you going to teach me when you don''t even know how the world works?! You can''t cycle in your sleep? You can''t use elemental essence before entering Qi stage? You can''t manipulate Qi without doing the tutorial? Wait, there''s a tutorial?!- End of TL;DR section
The Spoiled Master Wanted A Pet Book One, Spoiled Book I What to expect: ?? Non pornographic adult children''s book Lots of swearing and rude remarks ?? MC that is no longer human or humanoid. Reborn as a bug not human gasp? ?? No Harem or sex. Pet will not be having babies in any standard fashion or go through the motions thereof. Will also not be observing other people making babies or making harems This isn''t that kind of "technically..." story Technically there''s all kinds of drama in the background and crazy relationship dynamics ?? Daily life story told from MC perspective and they know nothing about "cultivation" stories. TL;DR: Tedious bullshit with shenanigans sprinkled in Slow buildup with information in MCs observations or the background without it being force fed. They don''t have god mode, why should you, ya creepy mind reading tossers!? Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original. **Time jumps from MC being asleep or tuning out for long periods of time. This is not a fast story. Do not rate it as such. Literally tagged "slice of life" instead of "tedious as balls." If this summary offends you, whoo boy! RUN ? (cue music) ? ?? Lots of action-based mutations/skill-development MCs cultivation is on rails but they don''t remember going to the train station. Nudge nudge, wink wink, spoilers to some bullshit you might piece together before the grand reveal ? They woke up like this ? Wait, who dat? ?? A troll-y system that takes everything the MC hates and makes it their problem. Example: Doesn''t like reading outside of specific genres for entertainment purposes? If MC wishes to read about any changes implemented they can find them in their logs which record everything. Everything. (Series Spoiler: The system is watching and it is personal)
The Spoiled Class Pet Book Two, Spoiled II What to Expect: ?? Spoiler! Slice of life GameLit. More slice of life than GameLit and notifications got turned off. Spoiler: Rankings and position affect what you have access to? Gasp! Not everyone is super elite god mode and MC doesn''t get special treatment because they''re not special? Eek! Spoilers! Oh nos! ?? MC still trying to figure out things people assume they know based on how OP they are Lots more of "you can''t do that" to "how the fuck did I do it then?" And, yes, MC will then repeatedly do the impossible thing in sequence just to prove they can While making eye contact ''Cause obviously the naysayer is wrong ?? Still no MC smex! \o/ Not sure how to make this more clear THERE IS NO HANKY PANKY! ?? More people who can''t have nice things ''Cause snacks or assholes and snacking on assholes non-sexually ?? More Sandy Soap Opera Dramatic pose: "You''re not the father!"
The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour Book Three, Spoiled III Spoilers: ??MC that goes from strong to not worth thinking about. Spoiler: New zipcode, who dis? What~? There''s a whole world of magic and rules change? No~... ??More references to mythology from the orient. In usual Kissy doesn''t know but finds out later fashion And not just Japan? But Asia? What? Japan isn''t all of Asia? ??More foods. Spoiler: [Big Four go here] Just one course. There''s several with different mains. ??Screens and notifications. Spoiler: When Sandy ranks up. Nudge nudge, wink wink. Systems with permissions ? And they''re a slacker~ ? . Prepare for spam! Grab a snack. ??More Imperial shenanigans. Spoiler: Tailors go whee? ??Zombies. (Tired of all the spoilers?)
The Entitled Imperial Treasure Book Four, Spoiled IV Spoilers! ?? Still no MC smex! o/ If you''re still waiting I would advise against holding your breath Although stronger, healthier, happier Sandy might think about settling down someday, but to what? ?? New Zipcode! MC goes from world MC, to Pet, to side character, to roving treasure to cheese events ("How are you so useless and so ungodly powerful?" Literal quote from someone interacting with Sandy) Back to that whole there''s rankings you have to do shit to maintain them (In a world of cultivation and progression? Gasp!) And MC doesn''t give a fuck about what the world wants They didn''t volunteer for this shit although that over there looks interesting... ?? More Sandy Family Soap Opera along the lines of "Save the Children!" Not a good parent? Won''t make you a good aunt or uncle. Not convinced? Just watch. -.- ?? Sandy learns more stuff Not about combat. About banking. Fuck fighting. And horticulture. ?? There''s a gun! Wait, what?
?? Final product of Spoiled! series on Amazon under GlytchedChiq with heavy edits and reformatting. Book experience versus rough edits and serial online format. ?? Cover(s) made with deepai.org image(s) and Gimp Skill development IRL? ?? Translations not approved. Or repostings. I''m making this shit for entertainment, but I''d like to get paid for my work, fuckers. I''m getting started, not established, and Amazon only touched my stuff after I gave exclusive publishing rights. Have I self-published elsewhere? Yes. Did anyone care? No. Did I tell anyone? Yes. Where''d that stuff go? My Patreon. Do you even know the amount of spreadsheets I have to make? I don''t know what I''m doing, but I try. When a formula works across documents it''s so satisfying, innit? Do you realize that if I fail to update the right number or my ylsdexia kicks in how far back I have to go to fix this shit? ?? Patreon finished Spoiled IV, full access $2.50 a month with Reader, trying to crank out a book a month, not necessarily just this series, currently working on Magical Girl Maggie, the "use your words" wordy, poor Half Low Alf, quarter Hobgoblin, quarter Lumeran who learned magic is real in time to see someone get disemboweled. Spoilers question mark? B4 Chapter One I''m trying to process that my assigned trainer is a gatekeeping dickmonger, and I accidentally found out why the Golden Rivers is considered a cultivator''s tourist trap. For cultivators, by cultivators. Now with non-cultivators! I swear I hear flute music on a stray breeze at the exact moment I notice a woman looking stunned, crouched in the middle of the road. And we''re heading right for her, because of course the runaway horse is going to trample some random woman or child. -*You gonna go around her, mebbe?*- A merchant? Really? "She''ll move. Most people here aren''t that simple," he flicks his fingers dismissively, looking past her as he continues barreling along. -This isn''t going to end well,- I snort, -- how? -- and settle in for the madness to ensue. If nothing else, he knows about void cultivation... As we bear down on her, she finally looks up. From stunned to horrified, I get to see her wide-eyed stare shift as she sees the pretty impressive horse bearing down on her. I wait to see if she''s actually going to jump, just spinning gently in a breeze of petals that come out of nowhere, the merchant suddenly enamored, when a lean, young man with the front half of his head shaved kneels in front of her, one hand thrust out towards the horse. The horse runs into the palm, somehow taking the strike to the chest despite the differences in height, stopping dead. Poor thing. Its neck tenses, head still moving forward, expression twisting in fear and pain as its forelegs stiffen and appear to compact, along with its spine, down its back to its hindlegs while its body twists. It looks like the miserable beast clenched everything starting from the palm strike, all the kinetic energy freezing inside of it with nowhere to go but throughout its body. Ultravision is truly amazing. I was concerned about the horse, and I get to see it even as the merchant and I are sent flying. Somehow the merchant manages to sail forward, head back, belly towards the ground, flying straight and true although he flails his arms and kicks his feet. I get to watch as my body, legs and wings tucked in, placidly rotates as I''m sent flying. Until the "young hero" leaps up and snatches me from the air, somehow managing to grab the back of the merchant''s collar, and then spinning, step by step to kill our momentum. Now Swimmer is standing, someone half his size collaring him while cradling me, and we''re posing for a thumbnail before the "helpless maiden" runs up to us. She pulls out a stack of bound cloth and a charcoal stick, writing, because of course she''s mute or deaf, and the hero releases Swimmer, hugging me like a plushie and bowing towards the woman. "Apologies, sister, but I can''t read," he keeps his head lowered, embarrassed or ashamed? Dude just saved her life and can''t even read her thank you apology. -*She apologizes for the inconvenience and thanks you for saving her humble life,*- I tell him, the cultivator smiling at me and nodding thanks. Not the least bit surprised that I''m speaking to him, ''cause wut~? Okay, weird. He puts on his stern face, turning to Swimmer, still cradling me, but somehow lowering his head to glare down up at the larger man. I wave a forelimb at the woman who starts, clutching her writing pad to her chest while staring at me. Are any of her expressions not wide-eyed and stunned? Stunned horror, stunned surprise, stunned disgust... Unless it''s disbelief and disgust? Maybe she had a stroke and her mouth is paralyzed? "Elder, you should know better. As a non-cultivator you should be more conscious of the preciousness of life," he admonishes Swimmer before standing patiently for their response. ... -*Are you going to put me down?*- I ask, reading his name badge... Young Dragon? Really? The young hero blushes harder than he did when he admitted he couldn''t read. And hands me over to a random cultivator standing in a group of people surrounding our drama like it''s a street performance. Why? Who is this? Wood Falcon? The fack is a wood falcon? Who dis stunned bish? Blooming Red Sage? -*Oy!*- I wiggle, trying to get the cultivator to set me down while the others are talking. He tenses and clutches me tighter, turning around and speed walking through the crowd. -*Oy!*- Am I being kidnapped right now? What the fuck is happening? Horse speeding down the road nearly trampling a "helpless" person? Check. Unknown young hero saving everyone and being polite and humble? Check. Shady asshat kidnapping someone at the same time? Is this a thing? -*Put me down. I need to learn about raising void bugs from the merchant.*- What kind of sorry excuse was that? "Shut it," Woodcock hisses to the top of my head, squeezing me as he darts in and out of narrow lanes. Is he hauling me through back alleys? -*You really don''t want to do this.*- First and final warning, jackass. "Shut up before I smudge you with flybane!" he hisses next to my antenna, which I''ve flattened against my back at some point. He''s going to smear me with flybane? How heavy is flybane? Or is it solid enough to use as a flyswatter? Does he braid it into a switch or staff? My antenna twitch, but I don''t flick them. I must be angrier than I thought. No way am I scared of this teddy-hugging thief. I''m gonna eat his shit. But I need to figure out my notifications first. Simple gave me a bar, which tells me progress but not numbers and I want numbers. Knowing I did something versus how many times I need to keep doing it feels like progress. Is there a way for me to check notifications? Notification styles? [[Skill] Successful [multiplier]] [Successful Use: [current usage]/[usage to next level]] [Qi [change]] [Con. Qi [change]] [Karma [change]] [Current Condensed Qi: [Progress Bar: Percentage]] [Current Qi: [Progress Bar: Percentage]] [Current Karma: [Progress Bar: Percentage]] Let''s go~! I squeal, forelegs raised in victory and this bastard claps a hand over my face. Before I can get offended he snatches it back, recoiling and wiping his hand on his tattered pants in disgust. Really? I''m eating all of your shit... I sniff at him while he weaves through narrow paths, enclosed yards, buildings and side roads, trying to figure out what I''m going to eat first. Focus! Notifications simple. Notification styles? [[Skill] [Unsuccessful]/[Successful] [multiplier]] [Successful Use: [current usage] [multiplier]/[usage to next level] [multiplier]] [Qi [change] [multiplier]] [Con. Qi [change] [multiplier]] [Karma [change] [multiplier]] [Current Condensed Qi: [Progress Bar: [current Con. Qi]/[max Con. Qi]]] [Current Qi: [Progress Bar: [current Con. Qi]/[max Con. Qi]]] [Current Karma: [Progress Bar: [current Con. Qi]/[max Con. Qi]]] [Mortal Wallet: #Emperor(s),#King(s),#Prince(s),#Regent(s),#Dalin,#Denii,#kin] [Spirit Wallet: #Dragon(s),#Phoenix(s),#Thumb(s),#Disc(s),#Coin(s),#Stone(s)] Now that I have a 1,000-year''s supply of alphabet soup, -- no percentages, I think, -- I can turn my attention to my new grocery list. He''s got something tucked into his vest, a tan colored sleeveless upper robe, pressing against my back. There''s a black band around his right bicep and a red bracelet around his left wrist that smell similar despite looking drastically different. [Identify Unsuccessful x3] [Successful Use: 0/100] [Qi -12 x3] [Con. Qi -12 x3] [Karma -25 x3] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,625/23,843,999] [Current Qi: 584,581/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,998/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] His hair is up in a messy ponytail, bangs hanging shaggy and held down by a headband that reminds me of the black vests in the canyon. [Identify Unsuccessful] [Successful Use: 0/100] [Qi -12] [Con. Qi -12] [Karma -25] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,613/23,843,993] [Current Qi: 584,569/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,973/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] Which actually might be a good spot for me to just chill. No, wait. I had feeding filters. Nevermind. I flick an antenna in annoyance. I''ve got notifications, and I''m not doing something right, and I''m getting feedback, but how do I actually do it right? I''m not actually focusing, I''m just doing a quick sniff, but this is a thing? If I actually try anything will my life be pure spam? I sigh and he goes into a building, closing the door behind him. We''re in a small room, bigger than my pit traps, and maybe bigger than Persephone''s single room shack, with trash scattered around the periphery. I sigh as he finally sits down, setting me down and grabbing a gourd from beneath a pile of sheets before popping the plug and chugging it. Something else for me to eat later. My antenna twitches, flicking forward, -- do I feel comfortable now? -- and the man gives me an exasperated glare. Bish, did I tell you to steal me? -*What exactly do you think is going to happen?*- I scan the room with Ultravision, seeing nothing but dirty garbage, although I do smell a few things. [Identify Unsuccessful x5] [Successful Use: 0/100] [Qi -12 x5] [Con. Qi -12 x5] [Karma -25 x5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,553/23,844,018] [Current Qi: 584,509/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,973/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] So is that another item on top of the four before or 5 new items? I yelp, curling up and bubbling when he focuses on me then gets on hands and knees to stare down at me. [Barrier Successful] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Qi -10] [Karma -10] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,553/23,844,017] [Current Qi: 584,499/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,843/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] It has a name? I recoil from the notification, trying to put a bubble between it and me. [Barrier Successful] [Successful Use: 2/100] [Qi -10] [Karma -10] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,660/23,844,015] [Current Qi: 584,489/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,838/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] My face drops into blankness as I register what I attempted to do. I know better! No I don''t. There''s probably a shield that can block off whatever this is. How would I know if I had it? "Hmm?" Woodcock leans forward, nose nearly pressed to the barrier, but they''re looking at me. How''d I forget he was here? "Whatever you did for the merchant, you do for me. Got it?" -*I just met the merchant today, and he was taking me to his compound to learn how to raise void bugs,*- I inform him, wondering, again, what he thinks I can do. -*Are you going to train me to raise void bugs?*- He stares at me before his head drops with a sigh. He flings himself back to his seat, an elbow resting on a raised knee as he rests his head on the wall. He closes his eyes and goes still and I wonder if he''s asleep, cycling or praying. If he''s sleeping, soup''s on. "Tch!" Fack! I flinch, his eyes opening but he stares straight ahead. "I find an unusual spirit and it doesn''t know anything?" Unusual spirit? What else can I do? Do I have titles? How would I find them? I focus on me. Titles?
Title Requirement Count
the Awakened Start your Journey against your will 6
the Hungry Have Consume trait N/A
the Reject Have a gift or offer rejected 20
Pet Be officially registered as a Pet 2
the Backslider Lose a realm 2
Confounder Mutate 5 times. 5
of the Void Form a connection to a Spatial realm N/A
Demon Accrue -10000 reputation with any faction N/A
Saint Accrue 10000 reputation with any faction N/A
Celestial Gain Elemental Affinity with 3 or more Elements N/A
the Polyglot Have Languages Perk or learn 3+ languages N/A
the Devourer (III) Consume 1000 non-food items 3
the Willful (V) Gain 10000 Will points 5
Sky Strider Have a flight ability N/A
the Resilient Develope a 50%+ Resistance N/A
the Resolute Gain Immunity N/A
Returnee Die at least once 5
Shattered Hunan: Lose Faith This book is hosted on another platform. Read the official version and support the author''s work. Insect: Be Sterile Lose a fight while holding Monarch title 1
Swarm (King/Queen) Hunan: Have 1000 minions Non-hunan: Have 5 minons Insect(oid): Reproduce 1
Shy Hide cultivation level 29
Enlightened Complete a tutorial 1
Bish, wut~? I can has titles? Fuck your reject! I had no say in any of it. Oh, wait, Awakened. ... Fair. Wait. I mutated five times or five times five times? No way! I never mutated that much! I didn''t even see miasma until way~ later! "What can you do?" Fack! [Silk Spray (Tier 3) Successful] [Successful Use: 16/100] [Condensed Qi -20] [Karma -200] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,533/23,843,965] [Current Qi: 584,289/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,838/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] -*Don''t startle me!*- I flail in embarrassment, closing my screen so I can brace for whatever he does next. How do I keep forgetting he''s there? He hauled me through the city to this room and I legit just thought I was vegging in the Seven Moons nursery, how? Fack! All these skills and titles, how am I not "the Unobservant" or "the Clueless"? And how is he so chill?! He''s just sitting, face completely encased in what looks like shaving cream or whipped cream, but I know it''s my silk and it has to be impossible to breathe through that. And he''s not moving. Is he waiting for me to clear it off? I drop my bubble, slowly inching towards him to see if he''ll let me remove it. I flinch as he leans forward, but he doesn''t swing, he doesn''t even change his seating posture, giving me a chance to poke at the gooey mass. He still doesn''t try to scrape it off. I shrug, try to dismiss the silk like I dismissed the proxy, and I''m pleasantly unsurprised when it doesn''t work. ... If it had does that mean I could dismiss clothing made from my silk? Probably for the best that it didn''t work ''cause I''d totally be stripping people who offend me. Pffft. I already do! I scrape off the silk, banking it, which I think recycles it unless things changed, and step back, bubbling and waiting for his response. And his face is stern and unsurprised. And I missed a few spots of silk and whatever I use as a binding agent. ... Thought it was one mass not an actual wad of silk that could leave debris behind. Ah, well. "What did you just do?" he asks, casually pointing at his face with his free arm, the other still propped on his raised knee. Expression still stern and unaffected although I can see his pulse racing. -*I make silk. That''s one of the ways I protect myself.*- I try to groom and look casual. He''s not the only one who can play calm! "Is your silk valuable?" He asks, face clearing a little as one bold eyebrow attempts to march up his forehead. Pffft. I''m not telling him shit! He kidnapped me! I''m still going to eat his stuff for the insults and threats. Who does he think he is? Who does he think I am? We''re about to get to know one another very well. -*I make it from garbage.*- Like the garbage I''m going to eat when you fall asleep. "Ah," he looks away, head maintaining contact with the wall the entire time, and I''m still trying to figure out why he took me. There was a whole audience witnessing Young Dragon hand me over. All Swimmer has to do is ask around. I''m sure this guy owes someone money. Or someone probably thinks he owes them money. Hmm... Maybe no one got a good look at him at all? ... Risk it for the biscuit! [Identify Successful] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Qi -10] [Karma -10] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,521/23,843,903] [Current Qi: 584,277/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,668/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] Wood Falcon, Swordsman, Wind Blade Oh, he can do wind blades! His race is swordsman? Or is that his job? Fack! I didn''t try this on Swimmer, I just looked at his name badge. The fuck do the name badges mean? Most people have a stylized wind or cloud mirrored left and right, framing their name. The clouds are mostly yellow, but a few people had orange or red. Is that reputation? I remember being able to see that Silvered Claw could kick my ass, how do I get that back? Wood Falcon''s clouds are red-orange, but what''s that mean? Fack! I should have played more RPGs. I feel my soul gag at the stray thought, and I know that idle thought is going to be one of my deepest regrets. Fuck tedious crafting bullshit. Fuck PVP. Fuck grinding and ''Cheese whoring. You want has cheese? Eat 1000 non-food items for Devourer cheese! Comes with a litany of negative side-effects! Who wants that? And where do I find out what the titles do? Or do I need an a-cheese-ment to find that out, too? Woodcock rips the band from where it''s tied over his forehead, revealing no interesting scars, and throws it on the ground like I put it on him and called him a pretty princess. He continues to tear off his wristband, armband, and vest. By the time he reaches for the rope he''s using as a belt I realize that he''s stripping down. -*Oy~! What are you doing?*- Wood Falcon ignores me, strips down to some weird breechcloth everyone favors over briefs, the fabric nearly blindingly white, then pulls the top layer off the pile we''re on. It''s a sheet. The pile we''re on is his bed and he''s turning in. In the middle of the day. After dumping all of his items next to the bed. Dinner is served? He had more items tucked into his vest, a knife, a roll of cloth, a bag, but he placed them under a bundle of clothing he''s using as a pillow. Is the whole bed just old clothes? I spread out the three items that smell different, just looking, and waffle between just eating them versus banking them or spamming them for I.D. practice. They''re special, but why? [Identify Successful] [Successful Use: 2/100] [Qi -10] [Karma -10] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,509/23,843,890] [Current Qi: 584,265/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,588/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] Band of Kinship Fack! Didn''t mean to do that. The armband is a what? Is this like a friendship bracelet or a memorial item? Pretty sure I don''t want to eat anything that important. Of his. I owe Broadband a couple of "devoured" funeral plaques. But what am I supposed to do? What are the other items? [Identify Successful] [Successful Use: 6/100] [Qi -10 x3] [Karma -10 x3] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,461/23,843,872] [Current Qi: 584,217/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,488/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] Band of Kinship, Band of Kinship, Band of Kinship Did I scan the same thing three times or do they all count as a "kinship" item? Did one person give him all three? Is he wearing drawers of kinship? I snicker and he pops up, glaring at me. I freeze, he continues to glare, then rolls over, flopping around, and thrashing before going still again. Did he really not notice or was he just checking? Or did he think I was laughing at him? Hmm... So if the only things he has are kinship bands or things under his pillow, why am I still here? He hasn''t pushed me into a homicidal rage, and there''s nothing of value in the room... What am I supposed to do? I kinda don''t want to play my hand too soon, so anchoring and going into my space would be a no. No food, no more skilling ''cause no food, no ''splorin'' ''cause door. ... ''Cause door...? I turn around to look at the door, with it''s simple latch handle, and no keyhole, and no magic... Imma go now. I get up, comfy with my mobility after finishing the Tutorial, then remember I needed a quiet place to study what I can do. A quiet place with food, I silently remind myself, careful not to scrabble as I ease myself against the door, reaching out to lift the latch. It immediately scrapes, loudly. "Hey!" Woodcock slaps the ground next to the bed, somehow launching himself across the small room at me. "Oof!" [Body Slam Successful] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Qi -25] [Karma -25] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,436/23,843,809] [Current Qi: 584,192/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,375,238/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] -*I either leave or eat your kinship bands! Choose!*- I shout, turning to the door and trying to push it open while scrabbling with the lock. [Silk Spray (Tier 4) Successful] [Successful Use: 24/100] [Con. Qi -200] [Karma -2000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,236/23,843,309] [Current Qi: 584,192/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,373,238/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] I don''t think my silk will stop him from tearing the door down, but there''s a satisfying muffled thump and shout behind me as I run away. Now, do I continue down the roads or go up? Pfft. I open my wings and they catch the swirling non-miasma mix that is a dense population living their best life, launching me up with very little effort. [Launch Successful] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Qi -2] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,234/23,843,308] [Current Qi: 584,190/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,373,233/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] Wow! What bargain! Didn''t I say I was going to pay more attention? But there''s so much to read... Why is there so much to read... Stop complaining, me! Didn''t we whine about having nothing to read? Didn''t we tune this, a little, to get to this point. Find food, then work on it! We''re on the "find food" part right now. The "work on it" comes later! I sniff around, trying to find something, anything, that screams "public garden" or "garbage heap", and come up with perfume and very faint B.O. that mostly smells like old dirt. How do I know what old dirt smells like? I know what the good moist stuff for digging in smells like, but what part of me catalogued old dirt...? My musings are interrupted as a fully dressed Wood Falcon hops up to a roof below me and begins racing along its perimeter, looking down the side streets. Oh, shiz! [Aura of Suppression Successful] [Successful Use: 2/100] [Con. Qi -100] [Karma -1000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,799,134/23,843,058] [Current Qi: 584,190/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,372,233/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] Don''t bubble, don''t bubble, don''t bubble. Just think quiet thoughts. Quiet like a cultivator fart... Nonexistent by my will... So quiet. Wood Falcon stands on the peak of the roof, giving a quick spin, fists clenched at his sides before slumping, head back with his eyes closed. Non... He opens his eyes and starts when he sees me. -Loud and smelly!- I scream. [Silk Spray (Tier 4) Successful] [Successful Use: 25/100] [Con. Qi -200] [Karma -2000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,798,934/23,842,558] [Current Qi: 583,190/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,370,233/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] B4 Chapter Two I don''t know what he thinks I was trying to do, but he sweeps his arm between us then gets plastered to the roof, one clear eye dancing around. ... Did he think it was another spitball? I shake myself and try to figure out where to go. Focus, me! Food! And then I get slammed and dragged. Apparently there aren''t many people flying because of the Qi paths I remember hearing about. What is my luck that I manage to drift into one just as this poor woman is flying through? Pretty sure I''m living someone''s dream, seeing how I''m being cradled in the bend of one leg, my head resting against her hip as she curses and spits but doesn''t move. Guess she''s either stuck on the path or trying to maintain her focus. Wait. She kinda looks familiar. No way! I laugh as I realize that I think this is the same lady who was on the path the first time I saw someone being dragged behind a sword. There''s what looks like a red ribbon wrapped around her sword wrist, and I feel a steady pulse cycling from somewhere above me, down her side and legs before it weakly runs back up again. Is she cycling? We curve down to a platform near an open wall, people within the top of whatever this building is sitting at tables and either enjoying drinks and snacks or very light meals. The woman touches down, not stumbling, whipping the sword to rest on the back of her arm, breathing deeply and evenly, and seeming very calm despite her earlier panic. And I''m on my back on the ground after I slid down her leg, just waiting to be squished. Get up, me! I roll over, sluggishly climbing to my feet. A groan, a quick face cleanse and wing ruffle, and I''m scooped up before I can take a step. I blank, trying to figure out Whiskey Tango Foxtrot as she picks me up, -- sword sheathed when? -- and grabs at my wings while mumbling to herself. She fumbles around as I''m still trying to process that she picked me up before she manages to actually open one of my wings. Barely. We''re almost the same size. "Well, whatever family lost this Greater Wimble did an excellent job of raising it and decorating its wings," she mutters, turning me to face her and bracing me against her hip. "Until your owners shows up you can stay with me." -*Or you can let me go.*- What the hell lady? From "it''s in my hair" to "I''m gonna keep it" with one wing flutter? Bad idea. Her eyes bug out but she doesn''t lose her thoughtful lip purse or move to release me. Fack! Did shattered rainbow''s parakeet talk out loud or through sendings? Am I not supposed to talk at all? The woman relaxes and alarm bells go off in my head. I try to scrabble away but she tucks me under her arm, casually ignoring my efforts even though she''s fighting back, and just walks to the stairs. I''m literally pushing her arms away and she just smoothly windmills like she''s winding up a large sheet, catching me over and over and over while nonchalantly making her way downstairs and outside. The fack is she taking me? -*Oy! Let me go!*- I don''t catch a whiff of garbage, but I do catch a glimpse of a person in stained white clothing carrying a shallow pan of bruised veggies and cuttings down a set of steps set into the ground. Food? I huff, writhing in an effort to be as mentally abhorrent as possible in the hopes that she''ll be grossed out and toss my giant, squirming bug-self away. She shudders, gags, possibly pukes into her mouth, keeps her teeth clamped down on that grossness, and keeps power marching until we''re in a building not far from where we landed. The door needed a large blocky wooden key, the room beyond bright and airy with a set of steps that go up into another area, this one enclosed by walls instead of crosshatch looking fence posts, then shuts the door to this dimmer upper room. She locks the door, -- same key or new key? -- which was open when we got up here, and then storms across the room before flinging me onto a bed. A quick look around and everything seems fluffy, clean, and colorless, and I can see that I shed by the fact my scales are leaving a nice light dusting of rainbow glitter on the thick comforter. And she wants to keep a pet in her world of white fluff? -*What did you kidnap me for? You''re not the first, and I will get free.*- Shut up, me! Fack I''m cranky when I don''t eat! She doesn''t say a word, just pulls out a drawer from a white-washed and gold painted dresser that''s all curves and clawed feet, marches over to me, and sets the drawer beside me on the bed. She hooks a stool that I couldn''t see because it blended in so well, and sits down facing me before pulling items out of the drawer. Old clothes from the looks of it. She scrutinizes them, noting holes, tears, rips, stains, and discolorations in what looks like white silk or satin, piling the clothes on the bed. -*Are you listening to me?*- I trill while mentally prodding her. And she glares at me, lips pursed before patting the pile of clothes she''s set next to me. Was that a shut up and eat? Are these clothes even hers? Or is she expecting me to mend them? I sputter, bracing myself for a snack and tirade as I pick up something and start munching. Pffft, if she thought I was a trained seamstress, think again! I cackle and she nods and takes the drawer before walking away. Wait, what? "You''re clearly not fed on table scraps, but cloud grass silk is the best I can offer, so enjoy," she mumbles as I nibble. She pulls open another drawer, leaving it in the dresser and going through more clothes. "I expect your family will compensate me for twice the value of lesser true silk clothing, so I''ll consider this an investment and good housekeeping." She huffs, walking over and adding more clothes to the pile. "Hopefully they find you before we get into my good stuff, hmm?" I want to feel bad but she''s making all these assumptions on her own. Not fed on table scraps? True, but only because my "owners" thought table scraps were too good for me. Once I got good enough to produce quality silk regardless of diet the good stuff got tucked away for the next abomination. Peh! "Don''t expect flowers, but I will head to the market to get you some greens later, okay?" she says, rearranging the clothing in the dresser. -*I can wait,*- I mumble, still eating. Why is it taking so long to eat one piece of clothing? I''m not hungry, it tastes like salted fried zuchinni, and I''m not going over my shit because I don''t know if it''s filling or not. Because I''m still eating it. Pretty sure I''ve gone through whole bodies faster than this, what''s going on? -*You said this was cloud grass silk?*- It''s not hard to eat, the mouth feel similar to meringue layered over summer sausage, but I''m making no headway. The pile is going down but I swear I''ve been chewing on the same piece of clothing for over a minute. Or is it every piece has the same flavor and mouth feel? How the hell do you make so many things this consistent? It''s like every piece was made from the same batch of silk. But she said it was cloud grass? What''s cloud grass? -*Finished. What are you teaching me today?*- Fingers crossed this works? I start grooming, finding random things attached to my back legs. Crap, there''s one of Woodcock''s kinship bands. I eat it as, name badge says White Silk Camellia, wanders over and starts scritching the silk around my neck, back, and chest. I has mane? She finds a spot between my wings and my body locks up, legs straight, wings spread and I don''t know if I need to poop or not. Laughing, she walks off while my brain resets, then comes back with a strip of red fabric. A wristband? Like the flying path hauled her around by her sword arm wristband and she wants to try to put this thing around my neck? -*Don''t drag me around by the neck!*- I curl up, forelegs in the way as I kick with the other four. "Silly! You can fly! At most it''ll be like having a leash!" She smirks like she''s humoring then tries again. -*Body harness, not noose!*- I flex my wings fully, just a quick flash, then scrabble away when she drops, looking brain dead then tased. [Mesmerize Successful] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Qi -10] [Karma 100] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,797,434/23,842,583] [Current Qi: 596,680/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,370,333/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St] "Ugh!" She pulls herself up the bed, nearly pulling me off as she attempts to regain her feet. "Beast harnesses cost 5 Spirit Stones! Will you compensate me?" I cough up five of the crystalline blue LED cubes and groom when she stares at them wide-eyed. [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,531St - 5St] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,798,934/23,842,583] [Current Qi: 583,180/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,370,333/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] -*For the purchase of my harness. Do not cheat me.*- She looks at the blocks, then me, slowly reaching out while doing her Red Sage impression. Stunned awe! I earned it? Fack! She doesn''t know I''m a void bug. Does she think I''m a wallet now? Crap! Did not think this through... Just really, really, really didn''t want her to put a noose around my neck and hang me from a flight path. She stands, bounces the stones in her palm, nods, then casually scoops me up, holding me against her hip, interrupting my groom and we''re tracing our steps back out. "We have to move to a Flight Path point to purchase and register a harness. We''ll need to find out what your Qi conductivity is in order to find what paths you can run, then we can do a tour of the city," she grins down at me, tap hopping her way down a wide path. Her movement ability involves her skipping. In slow motion. But covering descent distances. Tap with the balls of one foot, uppies arc, tap off with the other foot when you''re close enough to the ground to reinitiate uppies arc. We''re moving, but not as fast as a runaway horse. Which isn''t that fast by cultivator standards. To be fair the ride is smooth enough that I could take a nap, but I don''t want her to stealth pi?ata me for the coins she thinks I ate. "Your family must be missing their purse," she murmurs, setting me on a table near a group of people wearing yellow and orange clothing made of broad strips of cloth, with red bands held in hand and tied at various points along their bodies. "We''re looking for a beast harness for this little one," she says, patting my back end as she fluffs and readjusts my wings, ''cause touchy? The men in the group shuffle, looking up and away before one of the women walks over, blank-faced and doing customer service. She sighs and begins palpitating my wings and body, flexing my legs and combing through my antenna. "A small beast harness. Can it fly on its own?" Name Badge, yellow clouds, reads Babbling Flowing River. She pauses and stares blankly ahead, hands limp on the table. The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation. Why wouldn''t I be able to fly? I have wings. She checked them, are they not healthy? White Silk taps me on my silk end and I curl in defensively, wings out as I lift off. [Launch Successful] [Successful Use: 2/100] [Con. Qi -2] [Qi -2] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,797,432/23,842,582] [Current Qi: 596,678/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,370,328/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] They''re getting awfully personal with these checks. Pretty sure I don''t have a prostate in any form, but I don''t want them checking it. I don''t get far before she hops up, grabbing onto my legs, -- bish! -- and we drift down as I focus on not letting her tear my limbs off. I don''t know if she could but I like being in one piece. She gives me a pet, and I''m tempted to wing blast her, but I''m not sure how not to take out anyone looking in my general direction. While I''m trying to figure out if I should care about collateral damage, Babble creatively knots a long thin strip of fabric around my neck, under my wings, down my back, and across my back behind my wings. Just three quick movements and I''m all dressed. How the fack? I thought she was measuring me! What the fack? "For a small spirit beast harness on a flier, that''ll be 3 spirit stones," Babble drones, palms flat on the table, leaning forward as the other workers not at other tables -- where''d those come from? -- slowly shuffle a teeny bit closer. -*Use the other stones to buy more food,*- suggestion turned order to White Silk who nearly hands over all five stones. She freezes, eyes bugging out before she stiffly, super awkwardly, does a quick hop backwards before turning her back to everyone and pulling something out of her robe or sleeve, quickly shuffling things around. Babble rolls her eyes, a few people, workers, customers, and passersby smirk and make snide comments as she tries to get the correct amount. How hard would they be snickering if they knew she was trying not to overpay? She spins around with a bright smile before offering the correct payment, head back and proud as she scoops me up and swaggers away. -*What is the most common currency, and how much did your band cost?*- Go me! Didn''t even ask if spirit stones were that rare. "A cultivator band costs 3 Dalin and most things cost a few Denii," she says quietly, speaking through her teeth while maintaining her grin. Wait, what? Most things cost copper, her artifact cost silver, and I had to pay several gold? What is this dogshit?! "Beast harnesses take more seals and material to craft. If anything happens to your harness they have to make another. If anything happens to my Sky Road key I just have to buy another one." Oh~. That''s actually pretty nice. But what seals? These look like regular red fabric strips to me. Or do I have to focus and identify them? I''m tired and we haven''t even done anything. -*I have to take a nap,*- I mumble, powering down annoyingly fast. I don''t even know if I got the words out properly. I''m drowsy with a headache, and I don''t know what I did... What happened? I''m too tired to read and I still don''t know if I have calendar access. Where am I and how long have I been down? -Blargh!- I wake up trying to pull my wings out of the way. Did I swaddle me or did she? When my senses actually come up I find myself swaddled in white silk -- surprise! -- on what looks like a giant round pillow, Persephone bed style. Did Seph make herself a little pet bed? Kinda feel like a dick. To be fair I still never figured out a bed for myself. I just flopped in the dirt. I need to build me a house... I wiggle, squiggle worm my way out of the bug burrito instead of shifting, because tired, then look around and realize I''m by myself. With a wide shallow bowl of washed greens on the floor. There''s barely any moisture at the bottom of the bowl, but I''m pretty sure that just means I''ve been out long enough for the rest of the water to dry. But how long was I out? I shovel greens and small chunks of vegetables with weak medicine pills into my mouth, feeling refreshed and revitalized, and still with no clue as to how long I''ve been down or where White Silk has gotten off to. -Fuck it, I want a house.- [Greater Personal Transport] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Con. Qi -500] [Qi -500] [Karma 1000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,932/23,842,832] [Current Qi: 596,178/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,371,328/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] Instead of standing in a pile of garbage on a hill looking down on a lake in the distance, I''m under a super teeny, but still towering, goblin home-style tree. The overhead branches are spread out in a dense tangle that looks like a leafy cloud got impaled on a woven vine tower. -Where''d the mountains go?- [Imperial Infusion] [Count 1/100] [Qi +100,000] [Karma 50,000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,932/23,855,332] [Current Qi: 696,178/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,421,328/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] -*Mountains are for winners!*- the emperor crows, his proxy popping into being right in front of me before zipping up and away. -*Got ''e!*- -Aw...? Bish...?- I simper before snickering as he does a dramatic death spiral before zooming out again. -What even are you checking? Didn''t you do this? Imperial Infusion? Are you gonna take responsibility?!- -*Not that kind of infusion, you dork.*- He snorts, the sky turning dreamsicle, orange and white. -*Dude, saw you completed a tutorial. Wondered how you were cycling so much and you hadn''t gotten one yet,*- he just casually drops a bomb on me and keeps wandering around. -*Oh?*- The world pulses, my head hurts, and the sky gets sucked into a void. Literally. The sky starts cracking, the emperor''s autumn splitting along golden lines being dragged off into the starry vastness that I thought was my void space. What is happening? -Apparently sleep cycling doesn''t count,- I grind out. Fack, my head! -*Well, duh. How are you supposed to watch a cutscene in your sleep?*- I can''t even see right now. Is it blood pressure? Do I have blood pressure? Do I have problems with my blood pressure? Why isn''t this funneling into a --. [Orb: Rage (Tier 4)] [Successful Use: 1/100] [Qi -1000] [Karma 1000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,932/23,855,582] [Current Qi: 695,178/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,422,328/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] -I can''t believe you done this,- I shudder, nudging the orb before trying to bank it to see what happens. Hm? No notification, but the orb is gone. Is it ''cause it was technically already banked? Not important. Information. Must haz. -Okay, so I did the cultivation tutorial --. - -*Starter tutorial, but go on,*- the emperor says, the eyeball doing a cross between a loop-de-loop and a barrel roll. -So that was the starter tutorial --. - -*Cultivation starter tutorial. There''s a tutorial for pissing or spitting long distances. Pretty sure those are body control...*- the emperor trails off, mumbling more to himself then me as he keeps exploring like nothing''s happening! -My head is killing me, I think I''m dying, and you knew about the tutorials this whole time?- I drop, head first, then chest, then stomach, then butt, and just lay on the ground, wings and legs limp. -*I dunno what this is. Might be some void bug shiz. Really weird that you have so many contradictory classes. Whoever heard of a productive void bug?*- -So how do I trigger the void bug tutorial?- Almost pretty sure I''m dying. If I just let it happen it won''t be my problem anymore. -*Have you tried eating and cycling while in your void space or thinking greedy thoughts?*- comes the potentially not snarky reply. -Idle thoughts? Yes. Didn''t work.- Ooh, am I gonna puke? ... Nevermind. -But for the cultivator thing I had to think about cycling while cycling and then not do anything else.- -*What else would you do?*- the emperor scoffs. -Eat? Spin? Groom? Sleep? Everything but sit there and watch myself?- I''m not trying to yell, and I don''t really have the energy, but I''m pretty sure I''m yelling at a god right now. -*Good point, I guess.*- Bish sounds thoughtful? Why would you just sit there and not tune out of just sitting there? So do I try to cycle in my void with my bank open? Feeling pretty shitty so this might actually pop me. Here goes! I dump harvestable shiver thorn on me, not a masochist, just don''t want to potentially fall asleep and recover. I eat it, cycle it, wait for a notification or the world to change and nothing happens. Oh! I open up my bank while in my bank and I''ve got a spreadsheet with icons, short descriptions, numbers, a check box for harvestable. And another for edible. And another for eaten. And then another for collected. So. Much. Reading. I cycle, vegging with my box open, too done with everything to deal with anything and I get an image of me in my hunan form, in blue robes with purple squares on them, just lounging on a giant pillow while wearing the gaudiest, chunkiest gold jewellery. Necklaces, bangles, rings, there''s no crown but there is a giant golden chalice inset with some kind of glittery bits. I yawn, indolent, and I''m so confused that I get annoyed by what looks like a giant screen of static behind my image. The fuck am I seeing and why hasn''t that finished loading.
Collect 10 of each mortal currency
7/10 Emperor
27/10 King
180/10 Prince
54/10 Regent
179/10 Dalin
155/10 Denii
105/10 Kin
What does that even mean? I''ve got tons of money! Fack! How do I check? Wallet! [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] I can''t believe that worked... Wait. ... I''m short three emperors? But I''m not. I''ve got more than enough money to make up the difference! Do I literally have to have three more of the physical coin? Fucking --. Nope. -I have tons of money but I need three physical emperor coins. Is there such a thing as a money exchange?- I ask tiredly, pulling my legs in and then pushing them out to one side. The emperor makes inarticulate noises, the sky going from pastel orange to a darker almost red-orange as the eyeball thrashes. -Are you dying, and can I eat your proxy or will it pops?- Only the hard hitting questions! Can I eat it! -*Bankers, motherfucker!*- he shouts, the ground shivering, more bits of the sky breaking off and drifting away, but the void remains uncaring. -I''m in my bank, yes,- I snark back. I''ve been banking! One last disgusted cry and the emperor''s proxy pops out of existence, somehow managing to cause a rather substantial vacuum where it was that quickly fills. Nothing appears to be dislodged, but I don''t know what all is out. Something to check later when I have the energy to actually explore. -Unless he meant going out to a physical bank,- I mumble, closing the window and getting ready to turn in. -Do they even have those?- B4 Chapter Three I wake up in a wide expanse of big hills, feeling less shitty, but still pretty shitty. -Is there still stew?- I try to summon a pot, it comes, still piping hot. But it''s a pot of stew that''s still piping hot. Did I have some stored away or did the emperor --. No. If he''d turned all the cooking pits off the stew wouldn''t still be hot. Did he take it off and bank it? Is this emperor stew? It''s not a Persephone stew. Her''s were tasty and simple, but with ingredients I wouldn''t think of. Mine were a hot mess of sweet and salty fish and veggies. Ooh! Should have thrown some dough in there. Dumplings! I''m kind of disgusted that Broadband Chicken is such a good cook. I''m gonna assume he''s not a shitty person to everyone. What was I doing? Wait. Void cultivation. Sitting and thinking about all the treasure with my bank open while in my bank. Then --. Fack! I need to go to the bank. [Launch Successful] [Successful Use: 3/100] [Con. Qi -2] [Qi -2] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,930/23,855,580] [Current Qi: 695,176/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,422,323/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] I hover higher and higher, nowhere near crossing into the void, but I don''t have to get very high to see the expanse of my realm. I think it shrunk. -No! My void penis!- I shriek over dramatically, sitting back and trying to see the areas that had been set up previously. The swamp is... Diminished is being nice. There''s a dirty puddle not too far in the distance. The bulk of my bank appears to be hills with a fair-sized lotus pond in the middle. I flop towards the pond, letting whatever counts for gravity, will or magnetism, drag me to a sad, painless flop against a massive lily pad. I go through the motions to swim, despite being on a soggy leaf, until I can tuck and roll off the side into the waters. And into the void. I come out of a round pool surrounded by stone, wondering how I go from pond to moon pool surrounded by a broad walkway which is in turn circled by large pillars. The pillars, carved tops and bases, with rounded carvings along their edges -- floundering? flooding? -- glow faintly with prismatic light. My shit isn''t separated anymore? Would be handy for storage if I just had to select an energy and it''d auto convert versus me having all of the different energies stored, and then converting. Probably not what''s happening, though. I stand on the edge of the viewing pool, looking down into the reflected starscape and wonder if I''ll be sent back to the hills or if I have to go to the void --. Oh! Thinking about the hills changed the view to a pan over of the hills. Cool. I slip in, wind up in the shallows of the lotus lake, and wonder what happened to all my shit. I haven''t been banking stuff, but my bank was producing shiz. There were farms and orchards and different production facilities. With a shrug I wander off to find a semi-flattish area on a hill top. I check for harvestables, realizing that the plants were banked ready to harvest but won''t be producing anymore when I see there''s no shiver thorn available. ''Cause there''s always shiver thorn available... Focus! Hill. No, food! Food so I can make myself a house so I can sleep in a fookin'' bed! That I made! My bed! Not someone else''s! I don''t know what plants are rare or not so I opt to just grab the cooked foods. Three pots of stew and I''m ready to try. Here''s to hoping bug me knows how to eat out of a pot! Pffft, who am I kidding? Bug me definitely knows more ways to eat things than awake me. Probably gets mad that I''m not cycling, consuming, and storing all the things. Am I a loot goblin? The thought of loot, treasure, riches leads me back to the house that I want. A simple elegant house with wide spaces separated by walls that do little more than mark the outlines of the rooms. Screens and gauzy curtains, tables and comfy pillows. And the largest room will be the kitchen. Hells, the house will be a sleeping and eating area attached to the kitchen! I guess I want to make a kitchen... When I shake myself to focus I''m face first in a tipped over stew jar, just munching as I literally stand in the stew. These jars really are big. I back out and I can see that the other jars are tipped, one broken, the other still intact, and I''m next to a structure. Lacquered wood, paper screens, windows with shutters that swing in and up. Seating area when I first walk in, a room off to the side, looks like a bathroom, with privacy screens and a high upper window to let in more light. Further in there appears to be a wide alcove with a painted wall. Why''s this wall solid and painted? Approaching it I find out that it''s a hallway that leads left and right to two separate rooms with low shelf beds with sleeping mats and thin sheets. There''s no storage, but pffft. I back out, back to the main room, and check the last side of the house. Which looks like a warehouse with a four burner cook stove. The walls here are thicker, the room darker, and the walls are lined with pots, shelving units, and crates. The ceiling here is higher, the rafters empty, for now, but there''s plenty of space for drying shiz. I want to check the crates, to get something started, but I don''t want to burn my house down already. But I''m looking forward to getting some me geared flavors already. I''m awake, don''t know when I went down or for how long, and I need to get three emperors. Time to head out. "Stand and I''ll plant you in the earth!" White Silk unsheathes her sword, a quick flick of her wrist slinging it across the room as she twirls away, planting it in the ground for easy sheathing as she makes a sword seal with her left hand as she spins to face me. -Oof!- I bounce off of her and nearly into the wall, scrabbling as I try to figure out where I was and why the furniture looks like it was moved around. Then I register what she said. -*Did you just say "step up and get sent to hell" or "step forward and I''ll bury you"?*- "You''re back?" she blinks then casually straightens, gathering her sheathe and putting away her sword. "Did your owners find you." -*Was there something in this spot? Where I am?*- What''s my anchor look like? Tell me! "The swirling spiral?" What swirling spiral? Apparently she has an epiphany, eyes and mouth opening wide and radiating morning person energy. "You''ve unlocked void cultivation? You have a void space?" -*Let''s go with that.*- Thanks for the excuse! She starts pacing energetically and I regret not taking a nap before I came back out. -*How long since we last met?*- "I had you for three days and you were asleep the whole time!" she pouts, stomping her foot and slumping in a mini tantrum. "We never got to see if you could use the sky road!" If you encounter this narrative on Amazon, note that it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. I blink at her and the missed nap regret grows. Sky road? The flight path or another sky bridge? So I was only out for three days after all of this? No, she said she had me for three days. Grooming I try to get my thoughts in order before White Silk stomps over to me, pulling and tightening something around me. -*Hey. Hey! Hey!*- I pull free and try to shake everything back into place. -*How long ago did I disappear?*- "Ten, twelve days?" she continues to pout, looking up and away thoughtfully before shrugging. "It looks like your Sky Road Key is attuned and you have excellent Qi capacity. My capacity is only so so but I ride the Sky Road constantly to train it. Come! Let''s see what your excellent capacity can do!" The fuck is she talking about? She hefts me and starts carrying me downstairs and outside while I''m trying to figure out if someone mailed her the test results of my rough physical, if she read the information on my -- what did she call it? Sky Path Key? -- harness thingy, or if she can see my elemental affinity. Can she tell how much I can bank or is what she''s talking about completely different? Once outside she sets me down and starts walking away. Grateful for the break I go back to grooming. I can catch up later but I need to get my thoughts in order. I still haven''t checked on my notifications and status changes, nevermind figuring out if the titles are special or just change the cloud banner to something else. She sucks her teeth when she notices that I''m not following her, retraces her steps, then picks me back up before continuing on her way. Okay~, not what I was going for. -*I attuned my harness?*- Focus! Is this what caused me to drop or did it happen after I dropped? How accurate is it and how do I check it? "Mm! When you cycle the harness takes some of the energy from your paths and uses that to reinforce itself and allow you to fly along the Sky Road!" I don''t regret Ultravision, but I do not like being able to see how upbeat and chipper she is when I''m feeling like crap. "You can read the harness to find out who it belongs to. Try it!" She tucks me in, holds her wrist up to me, soft underside up, and waits. For what? How am I supposed to read it? Is this one of those focus and it''ll work or one of those visualize and it''ll work? Or do I have to touch it? Is that why she was jerking me around earlier? I don''t want to accidentally slit her wrist reaching for it with my legs, so I opt to stare, visualize, and focus instead of just stare and focus. [Qi Channel Successful] [Qi -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,930/23,855,580] [Current Qi: 695,171/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,422,323/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] White Silk. Capacity: Low. Oh. Channeling like I did in Miller''s Cross what with the gems. Wait. Her capacity to low or channeling capacity is low? -*Question: Do you have very little Qi or do you have a low capacity to channel Qi? Those are two separate things, aren''t they?*- I want to spam Identify on shiz but I just woke up. "Mm! My capacity is only so-so, but I have a hard time keeping a consistent and steady stream of Qi when I channel," she says, making small movements with her fingers in sword seals as she moves through some form with a few twists of her wrist while still holding me. Why do people like carrying me all of a sudden? "The Sky Road will pull it out in a steady stream, regardless of your control, but it helps if I can identify how to do it so I don''t need an artifact or construct to help." She mounts the stairs in the small shop -- landing dock? -- she''d used when she''d first run off with me. "Let''s give it a try! First we''ll take the left hand route and go to another low traffic residential district, okay?" Oh~. This is a spot near people''s houses for real. A quick snack bar when people don''t want to go home, not a full blown restaurant or eatery. I wonder if this is someone''s house they''re renting out as a resting stop. I shake my head, look up and focus on my harness while trying to cycle. The straps make my body tingle, golden streaks become more solid when I look up, and I get whisked along the path where she''d crashed into me. Which is the right path, not the left. How was I supposed to choose? [Barrier Successful] [Successful Use: 3/100] [Qi -10] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,930/23,855,579] [Current Qi: 695,161/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,422,318/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] Someone screams. Pretty sure she wasn''t flying with a bubble, but her flight was also slower than a horse''s gallop. The short bit of scooting I did with her lasted a few minutes. This lasted barely seconds. At most two. Apparently moving on the Sky Path moves you at Qi channeling speeds or at your fastest movement speed. I look up to see if I can visually follow the path to see if she''s coming, not even thinking about hopping back on, when someone wraps their arms around my middle and hoists me up. Again. Why are people doing this? -*What do you want?*- I don''t know if I wandered into a party or not, but there was a scream earlier but I only hear cheers. Am I going to kick some drunkard ass? "It can talk!" whoever is holding me shouts like they''re not holding me, bouncing and turning to face a cheering crowd. -*Don''t yell into my ears.*- I''m not gonna "please" some common decency! I get a quick apology but they don''t put me down. -*Put me down!*- "No, way!" The one holding me, a man with close cut hair, a twisted headband, dark yellow vest, and baggy sand colored shorts bounces me around and I''m worried he''s going to trip in his thong sandals. "We want to meet the master who raised such a powerful spirit beast!" She''d kick your ass for handling her merchandise, I think to myself and somehow don''t grumble out loud. I sigh and try to kick free, get annoyed when this prompts a wave of laughter, then spitball someone in the face when they pat my stomach. [Silk Spray (Tier 3) Successful] [Successful Use: 2/100] [Con. Qi -20] [Karma -200] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,796,910/23,855,529] [Current Qi: 711,124/5,850,300] [Current Karma: 95,422,118/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 7E,27K,180P,54R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1199Di,126Co,526St] Wait, did I get another Qi infusion? No, wait. Did my con. Qi -- I''m gonna assume that''s condensed ''cause I haven''t gotten an indication, that I noticed, to think otherwise. Before now. -- dissolve into regular Qi? What my numbers do? Or did I fuck up or gain reputation? Shit. Did I eat the Sky Road? I twist to look at the road, trying to double check that it''s still there, and the man, yellow clouds framing Muddy Waters, drops me with a shout. Ow, but not, and why? Oh! Spray! I spot White Silk coming in, still in the distance, and I''m not the only one. I use the distraction to latch onto white clouds Quail''s Irridescent Feathers, -- what a name! -- and get my silk back. By the time White Silk lands, the "eager greeters" are frowning at me from the room and around the one-story shack, Muddy Waters is standing with his fists clenched, and I''ve been blocking the landing pad grooming myself and trying to work up the will to see if I could jump onto the road without knocking White Silk off. Or would I splat her like a bug and my barrier is the windshield? Crunch her would be more accurate, I suppose, what with all of the tiny bones... "What''s going on?" she barks, sword not drawn but she looks ready to throw down or chew someone out. -*Something happened when I rode the Road and these people got excited. My master isn''t here but they''re gonna think you''re her. Good luck!*- I pause my grooming to wave my forelegs at her in a silent cheer before going back to cleaning my obnoxiously fluffy self. -*Do I need to be sheared? I''m not used to my silk being this thick. When''d this happen?*- Would explain why people keep picking me up and refusing to put me down. Even my body silk is quality. Either it cleans easily or my combing is very efficient because I''m pulling out a lot of random shiz and I have no idea where these items came from. Apparently someone, at some point, lost a bracelet in my silk. Weird how it doesn''t tangle but it grabs. Something else to look into, I guess. Spoiled! Book 3 on AmazonKU Just a reminder that books 1-3 are now on AmazonKU, books 1-2 are discounted until the eighth, and book 4 is being posted to RR but is for sale on Amazon but not on KU. Hopefully by the time Book 4 is going on KU Book 5 will be completed. To be fair I haven''t started 5 of Spoiled!, but i''ve got 1-3 of Essence on KU for anyone who wants to read a mouthy girl find out she''s not human, not even a little bit. She''s part hobgoblin, part other thing(s), looks human without a glamour, but that''s not why her classmates keep making mongrel jokes and not letting her play Peace Zone games. And she finds out she''s not an only child. And magic is real. And her grandparents on either side aren''t human. Need more spoilers or are you interested yet? This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere. Amazon Ranks I have no idea how or why, but the Spoiled series is ranking as Fantasy Erotica. At one point it was in the Top 200 of Fantasy Erotica. My rankings in any and everything are not very high. And yet, my highest ranking for my wordy not sex books is Fantasy Erotica. I do not know how or why, there''s not even heavy petting in my stories. Kinda does explain my super low rating, besides the people who expect a brilliant MC and nonstop action, but why and how did it get picked up as Erotic fiction? Neurotic maybe. And apparently an easily distracted MC is not someone''s fetish. But how? If you''d like to continue to be disappointed, try reading my other books also on AmazonKU! Learn about Ken fuck-sploding! There''s sanity loss, bladder loss, bowel loss, fucks given loss, the works! This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there. Still no sex. Imagine being superman without the reinforced and enhanced mind and body to deal with all of the super powered shit. Be disappointed in the Devil''s Crown! Join Maggie as the sensible girl learns that magic is real, it is now her problem, and she can die even if she figures it out. Oh, and she''s not human, she just passes for some reason, which is hilarious considering her mixed heritage. Still no sex. She''s 11, does have a birthday which is overlooked by the life or death magic exam she has to take, but she''s a kid. A wordy kid. Because adults would use "what''s a synonym for" to talk down to her. Yeah, so no sex, big drama, very wordy. More slow life/world build bullshit. Gasp! Be disappointed in Essence! What about Arika? A girl who just wants to be a girl, maybe more popular, but she''s happy with her lot in life? And then she learns magic! It''s not magic, it''s otherworldly technology, and there''s a reason people go for physical enhancement instead of spell-slinging. You take 30 seconds forming the energy to cast a breeze and they break all your limbs after walking through it type of reasons. Still no sex. Be disappointed in AccessORY! I''ve got a variety of works, not all MCs are OP, generally not geniuses, some have better instincts than others, or luck, or common sense, but none have sex! Be disappointed in my efforts! Amazon Ranks I have no idea how or why, but the Spoiled series is ranking as Fantasy Erotica. At one point it was in the Top 200 of Fantasy Erotica. My rankings in any and everything are not very high. And yet, my highest ranking for my wordy not sex books is Fantasy Erotica. I do not know how or why, there''s not even heavy petting in my stories. Kinda does explain my super low rating, besides the people who expect a brilliant MC and nonstop action, but why and how did it get picked up as Erotic fiction? Neurotic maybe. And apparently an easily distracted MC is not someone''s fetish. But how? If you''d like to continue to be disappointed, try reading my other books also on AmazonKU! Learn about Ken fuck-sploding! There''s sanity loss, bladder loss, bowel loss, fucks given loss, the works! Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original. Still no sex. Imagine being superman without the reinforced and enhanced mind and body to deal with all of the super powered shit. Be disappointed in the Devil''s Crown! Join Maggie as the sensible girl learns that magic is real, it is now her problem, and she can die even if she figures it out. Oh, and she''s not human, she just passes for some reason, which is hilarious considering her mixed heritage. Still no sex. She''s 11, does have a birthday which is overlooked by the life or death magic exam she has to take, but she''s a kid. A wordy kid. Because adults would use "what''s a synonym for" to talk down to her. Yeah, so no sex, big drama, very wordy. More slow life/world build bullshit. Gasp! Be disappointed in Essence! What about Arika? A girl who just wants to be a girl, maybe more popular, but she''s happy with her lot in life? And then she learns magic! It''s not magic, it''s otherworldly technology, and there''s a reason people go for physical enhancement instead of spell-slinging. You take 30 seconds forming the energy to cast a breeze and they break all your limbs after walking through it type of reasons. Still no sex. Be disappointed in AccessORY! I''ve got a variety of works, not all MCs are OP, generally not geniuses, some have better instincts than others, or luck, or common sense, but none have sex! Be disappointed in my efforts! Life Cycle So Volume 4 will be up for a week+ before it goes to Unlimited. Volume 5 isn''t ready to post, I''m working on a different series. I did burn myself out writing volume 5 and short stories, so I tried to take a break with a different series, crushed the writathon challenge of 55k in 5 weeks with 85k but it''s not on a submitted work, so... Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. Anywho! Essence IV might be ready mid december, might be able to go back to Spoiled V, and I''m gonna fail the writathon challenge on the shorts volume. To reiterate, Volume 5 is near 30 chapters in, but I won''t start posting it until volume iv goes to unlimited, and volume iv isn''t going to unlimited quite as soon. Enjoy? Volume IV Volume IV is still up on RR and I am now editing Essence Volume IV, so Spoiled IV will not be shifted to KU for a little while longer. I started Essence IV after the writathon started and finished it before the end, getting over 100k words in 3-4 weeks instead of 5, so crushed the challenge, just not on RoyalRoad. Tired. A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. Still not sure when I''ll get back to Spoiled IV. I was so close to finishing it, then tried to do it and the short stories, then tapped out. Too much Spoiled. Guess that means I''m taking a break? From Spoiled. Kinda on an Essence kick. Might go back to AccessORY or Devil''s Crown. No one will know what I''m talking about, but Spoiled V is over 20 chapters on Patreon, or you can just wait a bit and it''ll start posting after I take down Volume IV. Stubbing! That''s it for the update. Thanks for the support, Slacker shenanigans will continue. Even when Sandy goes try-hard mode it''s with a distinct lack of care. Life Cycle Going to start posting volume five on monday 16 December, so at the end of this week volume four is going to be stubbed and put up on Amazon KU. Volume Five, The Entitled Treasure Hoard, isn''t finished yet, so it''s not published yet, but I needed a break. Was trying to crank out content and then looked back and went, well, that didn''t work out the way I planned, so not sure where I''m going from here other than writing randomly. You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story. I tried. I did not succeed. I was probably supposed to move on 6 months ago versus getting past the second volume. Ah well. Spoiled! Series Life You are now in Book V(5) The Entitled Treasure Hoard Unless the title changes TL;DR Section: ?? Snarky MC that thinks like a comment section, refuses to read, and didn''t play the tutorial, trapped in someone else''s dream life with absolutely no interest in playing along, much less being nice about it ?? When relationships aren''t will they won''t they but people trying not to kill each other because it''s polite. ?? Author enjoys solo-playing Wurm (Online/Unlimited) **unmodded**, watching extras in movies for that one who''s EXTRA, and always wonders what happened in those two years where MC went from ignorant to badass. You have been warned. Nice people left reviews. Read them for a heads up. Affiliate/Amazon links for my shiz when I remember. I only get paid when someone buys MY books or subscribes on Patreon. Spoiled isn''t the only series, it''s just the most upbeat one. Yeah... I am broke but I like reading my stories XD Series on Amazon and AmazonKU Kindle Unlimited Deal Offer Anniversary Birthday Wedding ??The Spoiled Master Wanted A Pet Spoiled Book I Stubbed on RR for AmazonKU First few chapters on RR Random nonsense on Patreon Mostly art and ramblings, will be added to over time Story of a clueless slacker waking up in another world as a giant grub with a ridiculous name and a list of tasks no one told them. All they want is to be left alone, but there''s work to do and they''ve been volun-told to do it but not how it''s done. Being a rejected Gift to a high ranking family is hard. -I went to take a nap on my 15 minute break and when I woke up I was being manhandled into a cage! -Now I''m a pet for some spoiled brat in a world where magic is real. -"Pet", your face! Let me out!-
The story so far: Book One ¡°Aaah! What¡¯s happening?!¡± Book Two ¡°You wut?¡± Book Three ¡°I can¡¯t do what? Watch me!¡± Book Four ¡°So I just moved here on accident, what do you guys do for fun?¡±
The Entitled Treasure Hoard Book Five, Spoiled! V Sandy¡¯s Void isn¡¯t as private as they¡¯d hoped. New zipcode, new residents, new problems, but at least they¡¯ve got a better support network. And worshippers. Wait, what? ¡°More mountains means more power, and you fuckers turned my home into a plain? Fack!¡± Spoilers! ?? Still no MC smex! o/ ?? New Zipcode! MC goes from world MC, to Pet, to side character, to roving treasure to cheese events, to homebody (They have food, their own house, and power. No taxes or rent or utility bills. They made it! So why won''t people leave them alone?) ?? Remember the part about not being a good parent doesn''t mean you''ll be a good aunt or uncle? Left out the part about not being a good neighbor. ?? Sandy tries to morally check a priest/monk. (Perspective! \o/ Just because crazy stuff isn''t happening doesn''t mean you''re in the clear.) ?? Booze! (Drink Responsibly)
The Spoiled Master Wanted A Pet Book One, Spoiled Book I What to expect: ?? Non pornographic adult children''s book Lots of swearing and rude remarks ?? MC that is no longer human or humanoid. Reborn as a bug not human gasp? ?? No Harem or sex. Pet will not be having babies in any standard fashion or go through the motions thereof. Will also not be observing other people making babies or making harems This isn''t that kind of "technically..." story Technically there''s all kinds of drama in the background and crazy relationship dynamics ?? Daily life story told from MC perspective and they know nothing about "cultivation" stories. Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. TL;DR: Tedious bullshit with shenanigans sprinkled in Slow buildup with information in MCs observations or the background without it being force fed. They don''t have god mode, why should you, ya creepy mind reading tossers!? **Time jumps from MC being asleep or tuning out for long periods of time. This is not a fast story. Do not rate it as such. Literally tagged "slice of life" instead of "tedious as balls." If this summary offends you, whoo boy! RUN ? (cue music) ? ?? Lots of action-based mutations/skill-development MCs cultivation is on rails but they don''t remember going to the train station. Nudge nudge, wink wink, spoilers to some bullshit you might piece together before the grand reveal ? They woke up like this ? Wait, who dat? ?? A troll-y system that takes everything the MC hates and makes it their problem. Example: Doesn''t like reading outside of specific genres for entertainment purposes? If MC wishes to read about any changes implemented they can find them in their logs which record everything. Everything. (Series Spoiler: The system is watching and it is personal)
The Spoiled Class Pet Book Two, Spoiled II What to Expect: ?? Spoiler! Slice of life GameLit. More slice of life than GameLit and notifications got turned off. Spoiler: Rankings and position affect what you have access to? Gasp! Not everyone is super elite god mode and MC doesn''t get special treatment because they''re not special? Eek! Spoilers! Oh nos! ?? MC still trying to figure out things people assume they know based on how OP they are Lots more of "you can''t do that" to "how the fuck did I do it then?" And, yes, MC will then repeatedly do the impossible thing in sequence just to prove they can While making eye contact ''Cause obviously the naysayer is wrong ?? Still no MC smex! \o/ Not sure how to make this more clear THERE IS NO HANKY PANKY! ?? More people who can''t have nice things ''Cause snacks or assholes and snacking on assholes non-sexually ?? More Sandy Soap Opera Dramatic pose: "You''re not the father!"
The Spoiled Sycophants Imperial Tour Book Three, Spoiled III Spoilers: ??MC that goes from strong to not worth thinking about. Spoiler: New zipcode, who dis? What~? There''s a whole world of magic and rules change? No~... ??More references to mythology from the orient. In usual Kissy doesn''t know but finds out later fashion And not just Japan? But Asia? What? Japan isn''t all of Asia? ??More foods. Spoiler: [Big Four go here] Just one course. There''s several with different mains. ??Screens and notifications. Spoiler: When Sandy ranks up. Nudge nudge, wink wink. Systems with permissions ? And they''re a slacker~ ? . Prepare for spam! Grab a snack. ??More Imperial shenanigans. Spoiler: Tailors go whee? ??Zombies. (Tired of all the spoilers?)
The Entitled Imperial Treasure Book Four, Spoiled IV Spoilers! ?? Still no MC smex! o/ If you''re still waiting I would advise against holding your breath Although stronger, healthier, happier Sandy might think about settling down someday, but to what? ?? New Zipcode! MC goes from world MC, to Pet, to side character, to roving treasure to cheese events ("How are you so useless and so ungodly powerful?" Literal quote from someone interacting with Sandy) Back to that whole there''s rankings you have to do shit to maintain them (In a world of cultivation and progression? Gasp!) And MC doesn''t give a fuck about what the world wants They didn''t volunteer for this shit although that over there looks interesting... ?? More Sandy Family Soap Opera along the lines of "Save the Children!" Not a good parent? Won''t make you a good aunt or uncle. Not convinced? Just watch. -.- ?? Sandy learns more stuff Not about combat. About banking. Fuck fighting. And horticulture. ?? There''s a gun! Wait, what?
The Entitled Treasure Hoard Book Five, Spoiled! V WIP Spoilers! ?? Still no MC smex! o/ ?? New Zipcode! MC goes from world MC, to Pet, to side character, to roving treasure to cheese events, to homebody (They have food, their own house, and power. No taxes or rent or utility bills. They made it! So why won''t people leave them alone?) ?? Remember the part about not being a good parent doesn''t mean you''ll be a good aunt or uncle? Left out the part about not being a good neighbor. ?? Sandy tries to morally check a priest/monk. (Perspective! \o/ Just because crazy stuff isn''t happening doesn''t mean you''re in the clear.) ?? Booze! (Drink Responsibly)
?? Final product of Spoiled! series on Amazon under GlytchedChiq with heavy edits and reformatting. Book experience versus rough edits and serial online format. ?? Cover(s) made with deepai.org image(s) and Gimp Skill development IRL? ?? Translations not approved. Or repostings. I''m making this shit for entertainment, but I''d like to get paid for my work, fuckers. I''m getting started, not established, and Amazon only touched my stuff after I gave exclusive publishing rights. Have I self-published elsewhere? Yes. Did anyone care? No. Did I tell anyone? Yes. Where''d that stuff go? My Patreon. Do you even know the amount of spreadsheets I have to make? I don''t know what I''m doing, but I try. When a formula works across documents it''s so satisfying, innit? Do you realize that if I fail to update the right number or my ylsdexia kicks in how far back I have to go to fix this shit? ?? Patreon Spoiled V over 25 chapters in, full access $2.50 a month with Reader, trying to crank out a book a month, not necessarily just this series, currently working on Magical Girl Maggie, the "use your words" wordy, poor Half Low Alf, quarter Hobgoblin, quarter Lumeran who learned magic is real in time to see someone get disemboweled. Spoilers question mark? Book 5 Chapter One I¡¯m staring without seeing as I wait for the trees to clear and my little house on a hill to come into view. Screaming Red keeps their grip on me as a trio of hooded figures, hands clasped and heads bowed respectfully, shuffle over. We¡¯re out of the woods in a plain I don¡¯t remember, so I¡¯m assuming that they¡¯ve been cutting the trees and flattening the area. There¡¯s a couple of sod houses, smoking covered pits, no trees, no farm, no river, and no house. I idly scan as they greet me and tell me their chosen names. Red and black and purple, mottled fur, female. Pretty sure she might¡¯ve been of the sideways jaw. She says her name is Strong Claw. The next hulking figure is red and black, their hair an even mix of colors, and I think they were the melty boy with the twisted spine. Apparently she has chosen the name River¡¯s Shores, and I cringe as I let out a bark of laughter. I can¡¯t help it! She had a curvy spine and she¡¯s like, I¡¯m a river! Screaming Red, my second apparently, the Keeper of the Lore, my Ambassador to the outside, the Land Manager busy body who won¡¯t stop bopping my butt is calling himself Heaven¡¯s Fire. Apparently he was the runt that sat in the tree and whined until I figured stuff out, the one who had it easiest. Last of the survivor¡¯s ¨C holy shit, the four survived? -- is Gentle Fish. I¡¯m sure the information is noted accurately in my logs, but I¡¯m not going to call them by their names anyway, so it doesn¡¯t really matter. -Where¡¯s my house and who the fuck are the ¡®Light Bearers¡¯?- I finally snap after the introductions are done and we¡¯re not moving. ¡°Your what?¡±Jaws frowns before trying to smile politely while looking to the others. -My house? Big wood building with a kitchen and stoves and --.- There¡¯s no way in hell they haven¡¯t found my house yet. -How long was I asleep?- ¡°From our understanding you were asleep for three years,¡± Red, the only one of them that is just natural deep red, says slowly, voice lowered, and I swear to the gods if they tell me I¡¯m making a scene I¡¯m going to find their shit--. I deflate as I realize that anything they have was probably made by me, in me, and eating it would just be repossessing their shit. -Wait, you¡¯ve been --. Ugh...- I trail off and slump. Persephone was in me for longer, ¨C heh, ¨C but that¡¯s still a lot of developing time. So they¡¯re adults not just jumped up, overfed, bebes. Good to know. -Fack,- I stare up at the sky, waiting for them to figure out that I¡¯m asking about my personal abode, my kitchen, with all my--. -Poison!- I tense up and try to thrash free. -For the love of all tell me you didn¡¯t destroy my kitchen!- ¡°Ah! The toxic woods,¡± Red says, the others making sounds of understanding while nodding knowingly. -This is stupid.- I get over being polite and trying to understand whatever the fuck, and just go up. A shift to the sky to hover over everything and I¡¯m treated to the sight of some farmland, some woods, a forest, a lake, and I want to puke in rage when I realize that these fuckers somehow leveled my void. Mountains mean power. Mountains are progress! I just got up to tall hills and these assholes --. Did they do this by hand or ask me to trash my own shit in my sleep? Oh, no, I¡¯m going to rage puke. No, oh--. I touch down in some random field of ¨C. Are they growing grains? Are they making bread or just boiling them? I didn¡¯t see a mill, then again I didn¡¯t see much of anything. They¡¯ve got a couple of small mounds and some pits, and did they turn my river into a shallow field? They dug out my river and planted rice. What about my fish? My void! These assholes are worse than Broadband Chicken! I don¡¯t care that they tracked me down by following my wails. I don¡¯t care that I¡¯m on my back kicking and screaming. And they can kiss my unshaved, silky ass if they think I¡¯m going to calm down because they¡¯re watching. ¡°River¡¯s Shores cultivates poisons similar to those that were found in the raised wooden burrow,¡± Red says consolingly. I keep thrashing, punching and slashing at the air while glaring at Red. Red turns to Scoliosis and gives a nod before Bendy Straw shuffles off. I start thrashing more as Red comes to scoop me up. Try it, asshole! I know I brought them here, and I know they had help fucking me over, but where¡¯s my shit?! I freeze and realize that they might have traded my shit to the assholes outside my void. There¡¯s no guarantee that the dumbasses from my party understood who Trinity was or even kept renting out the room. Red said I leaked, right? That they were passing notes back and forth? Did they trade my hard won spoils for some --. Didn¡¯t they request foods from me? Wait. They wouldn¡¯t know what to request. Ah. I calm, legs splayed as I go limp. I could groom. I sigh and start grooming as I look around. Do they harvest this shit or do they request for me to harvest and replant? Bendy Straw comes back carrying a pottery jar with what looks like rough stone or mud plugging the opening. They set it down nearby, Red backing up as they pull out a little club ¨C literally a bulbous mini-baseball bat. Or is it a pestle? -- and break the mud off with small taps. Oh, there¡¯s a lid. They sealed the pot with mud? ¡°This poison is a liquid, but I¡¯ve got a few powders as well,¡± Bendy Straw carefully removes the lid with one hand, the other arm raised to cover their mouth and nose as they back away. I sigh, flip over and give a little shake before wandering over. They try to gently tell me not to get too close, to be careful, and I reach up and tip the jar to drink from it. There¡¯s screaming, there¡¯s panic, Red charges at me then stops when they try to figure out how to move me without tipping the jar, and I think these fuckers made Black Blood Moonshine. This shit is strong, less tea like, -- I take another sip, -- tastes more like what I remember flavored liqueurs tasting like. I tried branching out into different kinds of booze and syrups, but I¡¯ve always been simple. Guess I stayed simple. -Not bad, but I prefer regular Black Blood Wine,- I inform them, righting the pot and backing away so they¡¯ll stop freaking out. -The stuff in the wood place? That wasn¡¯t poison, that was food. For me. Poison for you, I guess, but that¡¯s what I eat. It¡¯s why it was so fucking hard trying to figure out what to do with you guys besides letting hunters train you or some rando¡¯s figure out how you guys were made.- A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. I start grooming as Bendy Straw hastily recovers the jar, packing dirt around the edge after making sure I didn¡¯t spill any of it. -Got anything else?- I ask. I¡¯m hungry and I don¡¯t want to chew on some fucking grass. -What did you do to my house? Give me the good information or I¡¯ll just wander around and figure it out myself. With snacks.- How¡¯s that for a threat? I go back to grooming as Red and Bendy get into a shouting match over whether or not I should be allowed into Bendy¡¯s burrow to mess with their stuff, destroying their hardwork, and ruining their research before I go into my bank to see if I have any of my shit left. I¡¯m going to eat their ¡°delicate¡± and ¡°expensive¡± gourmet poisons. Fack, I ate everything. I don¡¯t have pastes --. Where¡¯re my mill clouds? -One, I¡¯m going to eat your poisons and rebuild my void,- I interrupt them as the other two start coming over to see what all the noise is about. -Two, I¡¯m hungry, and I want to know where all my shit¡¯s gone.- I also plan on finishing the lake and what not, but that¡¯s neither here nor there. I groom, they convene and consult, and I have fish. Smoked, grilled, fried, raw, and living. It¡¯s in my bank, and the number for some of them are going up. What the actual fuck. How? Where? -Did you guys build a fish farm?- I ask, idly dropping a living thing of snaggle-teeth and spiny fins on the ground to see what the hell kinda fish this is. -Oops.- The fish thrashes and flails, somehow powering through the loose dirt of the farm like it¡¯s swimming in shallow water, slapping me and knocking the shit outta the quad. They¡¯re screaming as this thing, -- fuck, it¡¯s the size of a bus. Where the hell were they breeding these? -- starts devastating the crops. It¡¯s not even eating them, just plowing through and tearing them apart. The bits that git hit by the fins on its sides get sliced, the crops hit by the tail turn to confetti. Shoo-ie! That¡¯s a whole lotta fish! [Piercing Shot Successful] [Successful Use: 94/100] [Qi -30] [Karma -5] [Feeding Unsuccessful] [Successful Use: 1,625/100] [Con. Qi +1] [Qi +50] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,067/23,816,974] [Current Qi: 1,811,502/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,267,897/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] -Hmm?- I lay down as the debris settles, banking a few scales to get access to the fish¡¯s skin. I¡¯ve been feeding on what for how long? Oh! The lake! Right¡­ I enjoy my simple sashimi, ignoring the Quartet as they lament the loss of their wheat, -- is it though? Do they really have wheat or is this just how my brain is translating it? --, and I mumble about the loss of my everything before I keep eating. So¡­ Fish. No. Wait. Feeding. Feeding? Quests! Boards! Gimme da cheese! I grunt rhythmically, a not so silent cheer of ¡°Go!¡± -- without the words, but to the same rhythm. What is wrong with me? -- as I dive into the Boards while stuffing my face on --. I pause to stare at the fish, it¡¯s grey and black scales are just grey. I swear it had a dark shimmer to it. -Is this a demon fish?- I ask out loud. Why the hell are they breeding demon fish in my void? ¡°A side effect of bank propagation, or so we were told,¡± one of the smaller ones says. It¡¯s not Bendy, or Red, or Jaws. Was this Guts? The eager beaver that got ripped to ribbons trying to eat me? That¡¯d be hilarious! Keeps going for the safe bet on food and finding monsters? Ha! Poor bastard. Bitch? I think the fish monger is a girl. Wait. How many girls do I have? -Not mine!- I remind myself. They¡¯re not my kids, and neither were the triplets. -I still haven¡¯t eaten them...- I mumble to myself before turning back to the fish. Should I just climb into it? Wouldn¡¯t be the first time I ate something from the inside out¡­ No. That¡¯d be rude. I¡¯m still waiting on the quartet to update me, and I¡¯m kinda interested in what Guts is --. Oh, she was talking this whole time. Um¡­ Something about my energy affecting fish grown. They¡¯re crossbreeding the fish? In my bank? Like not in my void but stored away? Then what the fuck is all this grain --. I stop myself as I remember I too enjoy flavored breads and baked goods what for dipping in tasty fish paste. Huh. I didn¡¯t make these guys, but I kind did, didn¡¯t I? They were shaped by my energies in my bank as they developed. Well, my energies and the poisons, lightly sculpted by some outside help, but otherwise they are kinda mine. But not really. I shake myself before I can go to far down that line of thinking and focus on stuffing my face. While the quartet carve the fish up around me. Gods bless --. Ugh! And they¡¯re banking. But it¡¯s cheap. Free? Why the hell can they bank for free? Is it ¡®cause we¡¯re in my void space? No. Requests! Holy shit. That¡¯s a lot of fish. And noodles. What the fuck? Scrying Glass? Oh, the --. I sit and fume, chewing angrily on a scale that feels more like metal than fingernail or chip as I read that they fed me some of the spatial storages I was saving. Fack! Yay, Smorgas-Board? At least this is easier to read than just walls of text. Is it because it¡¯s dynamic? I can move this around, there¡¯s formatting, different colors, fonts, sizes. -Hmm?- I look around as Red picks me up and moves me and my bus steak, -- they banked the rest already? -- out of the devastated fields with some really crude loaves of coarse milled bread. Were they processing the grains with a rock? Hold on. Nearly two-thousand fish, most of them ¡°crossbreeds¡±, and only a hundred or so grain things. So the farming is fairly recent, but what were they eating before? Just fish? That doesn¡¯t seem healthy. So they¡¯ve been feeding me fish, there were requests to ¡°make more fish¡±, and that somehow evolved into demon buses? Why not make bread? And there were noodles. Are the noodles outside food? I could ask. After I eat. -If I pooped I¡¯d be afraid of this stuff coming out,- I mumble. The bread has so many whole grains in it, this has to wipe as it comes out. Exfoliates on the inside, too. -Why?- I get picked up and set off to the side as big Bertha, -- why is she so big? Is that Guts? I feel like that¡¯s Side-Snapper, but that might be Guts, -- is just plowing through the debris, leveling the ground with idle kicks and requests --. Wait, they¡¯re making requests right now? Am I just auto-approving this shit? I check permissions to see that, yes, I¡¯m auto-approving requests under a specific amount based on accrued and current points, with a lovely note to ¡°Fuck off, and let me sleep¡±. Fuck, I¡¯m an idiot. No, wait! I put limits! Fuck, yes! I¡¯m a genius! How the hell is leveling my house under the approval limit? Why would I level my house? Do I have any wine? I scream loudly in annoyance as I see that I¡¯m out of wine. Bet the creepy kid messing with poisons took all my good shit. For ¡°research¡±. ¡°What are you --,¡± Red storms over and I whip around and screech at them. -Did Bendy Straw take all of my wine for ¡°experiments¡±? Black Blood Wine and ¨C Did I have Saint Wine?- I stop mid tirade, sit down and just try to remember what all I had in the way of drinks. There was water, yeah, but I can make water. I was manually brewing a lot of shit. -There were different kinds of Blood Wine!- I crow standing up again. -I remember! I was trying to flavor it with berries and shit! Where¡¯s my wine?!- I glare at Red and I swear they look concussed. Did I hit them? -You ¡®kay?- I ask while going into my combat logs. Did I hit them? No, last thing I did was put a straw on the bus. Huh. I refocus on them to see them holding their hands to their face, palms flat but their nose in the way. Are¡­ Are they facepalming right now? I narrow my eyes and wait, just watching them. Yeah, they¡¯re taking deep steady breaths. I¡¯m sorry, are you done with me already? I wake up to find out all my shit is gone and some condescending asshole grammar-nazis me, and you¡¯re over my shit? ¡°Would you like to take a nap?¡± Red suggests helpfully, hands clasped in front of their chest as they tilt their head at me. Spoiled V Ch.2 Bitch. I¡¯ve been asleep for 3 years and he¡¯s gonna ask me to take a nap so I don¡¯t mess up their home any more? Their home? Let¡¯s see who¡¯s home this is! I stare at him as I get up and wander off. I look around to see if this area is just one kind of grass, and it appears to be, although the stalks aren¡¯t very high, probably chest high on them even if it goes over my head. I look back when I hear a noise, speeding up in case they¡¯re going to try to scoop me, but they¡¯re just flinging their hands at me in annoyance. I stop and watch as Red turns around, talking to the others and shooing them on, everyone going about their day like I¡¯m not about to fix what they did to my home. That¡¯s helpful, I guess. I keep walking, checking for anything that¡¯s not just cultivated rows of grains. No weeds, no secondary plants, no other wild life. They legit just cleared out everything and have one thing going. There¡¯s no variety. How¡¯s this natural? I can hear, and with a thought see, one of the not bears clearing the damaged crops still. It didn¡¯t feel like the bus did that much damage, but it was huge, and it had thrashed around for a while. Huh. Moving on. There¡¯s a section of dirt, tilled, possibly old refuse left to decompose, but why? Oh, probably because the fishing thing was taking all of my Qi to maintain. Wait. How much Qi do I have, again?
[Name: Kisandera ¡°Kissy Kissy¡± or ¡°Sandy¡± or ¡°Eclipsed Rainbow¡±]
[Affiliation(s): Thousand Valleys, Seven Moons, Companion of the Sacred Phoenix Sovereign, Inner Void Productions, Wimble Sunrise, Scarlet Silk Society, The Naturalists, Hunter¡¯s Association, Eager Heart]
[Race: Celestial Void Moth Queen[Shattered] (Saint)] ??
[Current Form: Reduced]
[Current Realm: Shimmering(Tier 5)]
[Current Karma: 95,269,897/107,275,977]
[Master: Shimmering Steel]
[Max Will: 9,579,451] Rank: SS [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,474] [Current Qi: 1,811,502/957,945,100]
[Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k]
[Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St]
Okay, is that good or bad? I still haven¡¯t gone up a realm, but I¡¯m not starving, so¡­ ¡­ Have I always had that much money? Hmm¡­ I keep wandering while checking my status. I don¡¯t think my Qi was that high, pretty sure I converted a lot of it to Condensed Qi, but my Condensed Qi was¡­ I don¡¯t remember. I have enough to do stuff without dying and I¡¯ve been down for 3 years with the Four Bears --. I stop and whip around to face the direction that the Quartet had disappeared off into. There¡¯s pits, true, but they¡¯ve got burrows, apparently. The little hills are their homes, so they still dig and burrow, yeah, but I thought they were rats. Why do I have four big ass bears in my void when I had little wombat babies. -What the fuck?- I scream whisper, turning and trotting away faster. Did someone come into my void and take the babies then plant these assholes to pretend to be them whenever I woke up? But the coloring is familiar, and they¡¯re not just dyed, they¡¯ve got blood essence in ¡®em. And poison. Holy shit do some of them have so much the poison. I think one of them survived shiver thorn. -Hmm...- I¡¯ve stopped. There¡¯s a wide dirt area, prepped for more farming, no doubt, but I stopped here, becauses¡­? I take to the skies, just shifting to hover over my house~! Oh! This is where the hill I had my house was! At least I think it was. Kinda basing it on where the river lake is, and there¡¯s less ground to go because there¡¯s no hill, ¨C fucking, really? Did they have to lower the whole place? -- and there¡¯s no sign of any of my shit. No rock, no ruin, just tilled dirt. Huh. A quick check and everyone¡¯s home so I hop over to the river for another quick what the fuck. Fucking taking inventory is gonna take forever. So there¡¯s weeds in the rice, little water plants, but I don¡¯t know if that¡¯s on purpose or someone¡¯s neglecting their duties. Speaking of duties, I need to plant my ass somewhere. I¡¯m not gonna be homeless in my own fucking void. Fucking --. I just made those stoves! Fack! I just rebuilt the kitchen and now the whole thing¡¯s gone! Really? Cool. I vigorously splash through the rice fields, startling a lot of fish, scaled and shelled. I¡¯m tempted to stop for a snack, but I don¡¯t want to disrupt things too badly. Even if I get rid of the bears I might keep the more productive changes. I wanted a fish farm, I¡¯ve got one. I needed to go through all of the storages and not clutter my bank. Ta-da! Still don¡¯t know if they sold my shit or just broke it. Or recycled it. Fuck, how much do I lose on recycling? That¡¯s the dirt, the river, what about the hill I was going to turn into the fish farm? I reorient on the river then drop down near the burrows. One of the bears sees me and starts shouting, trying to shoo me or scare me off. I pull a random fish from my bank launching it at them, and the creepy eel bastard starts burrowing. I yelp and run away, cause no, and the bear is sufficiently distracted by the snake thingy to leave me the fuck alone. Win? I sniffle snuffle and I¡¯m not picking up anyone other than the four I¡¯ve already run into. I¡¯m also picking up wine and tasty things. I listen and tiptoe closer to one of the burrows, -- they don¡¯t have doors or anything. They literally tear down my nice, roomy organized --. Fuck that, they literally tore down the hill the house was on! -- and listen for movement. Pots. There are tons of sealed pots in inset shelves and lining the wall with a pile of grass across the rather spacious room. I move towards the closest pot, -- kinda pointless to check to make sure no one¡¯s here if someone¡¯s here and they run me out, -- scrape it open, -- is this mud or clay? It¡¯s super crumbly when dry, -- and I¡¯m greeted with something that smells like blood and strawberries at the same time. This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. [Burning Blood Poison Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,507/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,902/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] When I get a quick sip I feel refreshed. It¡¯s a mixed berry wine. Spiced. Kinda like cider. But with berries. Mm. This is definitely a summer wine. Wonder if it heats up well¡­? Oh, my yes! Warm mixed berry cider during the fall¡­ Mmm¡­ [Burning Blood Poison Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,512/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,907/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] I take another sip then put the lid back on. I don¡¯t bother sealing it, but I definitely need to figure out how she made that. I move on to the next jar, pop the seal, -- this one smells like licorice, -- and take a sip. [Black Thoughts Venom Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,517/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,912/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Hm. That one tastes like black licorice. Not a fan. Think this one¡¯s just a ¡°mood¡± wine. Unless it tastes better warm¡­? Moving on. [Flashing Blood Poison Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,522/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,917/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Tastes like cinnamon and ¡­ some kind of red fruit. Not apples, not strawberries, not cherries¡­ Raspberry? Cinnamon and raspberry? I give a little head shake. Not sure how I feel about that. It¡¯s definitely a taste. [Blood Flashing Poison Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,527/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,922/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Same name, different flavor. This one tastes like sweet grapes. Literally just wine. Pretty tasty, true. Maybe even a classic, some might say. Looking for tea though, so a definite pass. The other juices were nice, but this bitch tastes basic. Pretty, but a pass for me. Meh. I¡¯ll call it a mood wine. Now, I know she¡¯s got some tea in here somewhere¡­ [Dancing Needle Wine Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,532/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,927/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Tastes like lemon flavored seltzer water. I close it and move on to another pot. [Heaven¡¯s Desire Wine Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,537/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,932/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Holy shit! Did she bootleg Saint Wine or ruin it? It doesn¡¯t taste watered down so much as it tastes like they didn¡¯t let it ferment long enough. Or the ingredients were only so-so. It¡¯s not bad, but if I never had the real thing I might think this was it. On goes the lid, to the next pot goes I. [Molten Yearning Wine Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,547/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,942/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Another cinnamon berry. I don¡¯t know if the combination is growing on me, but I kinda like this one. [Molten Yearning Wine Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,527/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,922/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] No, it¡¯s definitely this wine. I like it. I put the lid back on and move on to the next. [Aching Reverie Wine Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,552/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,947/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Tastes like a fruity knockoff Saint¡¯s Wine. Why are all of these wines? I thought they were poison? Oh. A quick flash of insight, most poisons were hidden as something innocuous. These are literally wines made of poison though. I don¡¯t hate them. I give a shrug, put the lid on and move on to the next. [Clay Vein Poison Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,557/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,952/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Oh, yuck! It¡¯s like literally drinking clay water. What was that called? Slick? Silt? It¡¯s just watery clay! Nope. I hastily put the lid back on, grooming to try to get the taste out of my mouth as I grab another jar. [Falling Star Poison Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,562/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,957/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Oh, fuck, they made liquid pop rocks. Whoo! I scream and cackle as my mouth fizzes and explodes. It¡¯s not so much a taste as a sensation. It¡¯s fun, but definitely not a casual drink. What¡¯s next? I put the lid on and move on to the next jar. [Eight-Headed Dragon Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,567/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,962/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] Oh, wow --. Help! My head rolls as I try to figure out what to focus on. There¡¯s numbing, fizzy tingling, silkiness, a bite of spiciness with out the actual heat, seltzer bitterness and then a sweet syrupiness. Fuck eight heads, this thing has split personalities! I¡¯m gonna need to be drunk before I touch this shit again. -Ack!- I put the cap back on and shove it into a corner before shoving the other jars to keep it there. A quick shudder and I stare at the next pot, wondering what I¡¯m going to encounter next. -Time to sack up and get my big girl bra on,- I take a deep breath, head up, and march over to break the seal on the next jar. [Shimmering Illusion Consumed] [Qi +5] [Karma +5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,572/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,967/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] -This just tastes like diet soda,- I stare at the pot in disappointment. No one told me that it was a full sugar soda, but I¡¯ve still got the same disappointment. Drinking just a basic diet soda after having a full-blown taste bud melt down is such a let down that I¡¯m not even looking for anything else to drink. Watch the next thing I crack open be just purified water or a gamer pot. I just wanted tea. Dejected I wander deeper into the home hole to find there are not chests per se, but woven baskets. How the fuck are they advanced enough to make pottery but they can¡¯t make a wooden box? What the fuck did they do with all the wood from all the trees they cleared? I groan loudly, frustrated, annoyed, disappointed in everything. I just wanted tea and fucking fish paste. Maybe with some nice bread to go with it. Instead I get some demon fish god, diet soda, and an edible scrubbing pad. Peh! I ruffle through the baskets, idly scooping a mouthful of leaves from each basket. To be fair, they¡¯re pretty cleverly constructed. There¡¯s a lid that is still attached by a strap somehow, so there¡¯s no misplacing it. They look layered, and I don¡¯t know if that¡¯s so stuff doesn¡¯t fall out or just to reinforce the shape of the little round cube structures. -All these leaves and not a single notification¡­ Or is it because they¡¯re simple items and not finish products?- I keep eating while I try to figure out why I can get Qi and stuff from some foods and not others, regardless of how much I eat. There¡¯s a thin leaf, dried, that tastes like potato chips, I still haven¡¯t found any tea, and I¡¯m tempted to withdraw and cook up some more of the bus. I¡¯m not hungry now, but I still haven¡¯t found my fucking tea bushes. Kinda suspect that some of the poisons were made with shiver thorn, mostly the tingly ones, but I don¡¯t see any. -Hmm...- I idly wander out to keep checking to see what all they¡¯ve done to fuck up my void. Tch! Elevation equals status in this world, and these bitches got me looking basic as fuck. Plains? Really? All my hills! Ugh. Why the woods? I haven¡¯t seen a single wooden structure or object, and they¡¯ve clear cut a lot of wood. Why the fuck are there woods, and where the fuck did all the wood go? Are they hiding something in the --. I stop and turn back to the smoking pits. What are they burning and why? I go to head back to the burrow, hear enraged screaming, turn back around and head back to get lost in the woods. That¡¯s my story and I¡¯m sticking to it. The shouting changes, feeling more pointed, and I cheat and see the screams are bellows and my ass is sparkly. Well, not literally sparkly, but my scales are shimmering under my silk occasionally, and that was enough to tell on me. I scream and race into the trees, darting around, but no one comes after me. Guess they realize who¡¯s in charge. I snort and keep trotting into the trees. The trees look mundane, and a quick nibble of a few doesn¡¯t yield any interesting textures or flavors, so I guess they¡¯re just mundane wood. Or I don¡¯t like the trees I sampled, although there was a variety. -Or maybe I need to boil them?- Does boiling bark make --. I can feel the ghost of Silent Howl glaring at me, waiting for me to finish the thought. Like I haven¡¯t made decent teas from boiling random shit. I really do need to find out where the hell that guild is¡­ Meh, that means going back into the Emperor¡¯s influence and dealing with his bullshit. Or I can work on not looking like a noob and figure out where all my shit went. Is Renegade Valley accessible from Golden Sun --. Light Bearer¡¯s language is the local language. Fack. Wait. Why does Rising Sun use a different language if the emperor came from Golden Sun? -Hmm?- I come back from my musings to see I¡¯ve trotted back to the lake, or what¡¯s left of it. It wasn¡¯t very deep, but it was pretty expansive. So I¡¯ve got a clear, wide, muddy area away from the burrows, infused with ¡°Bad Water¡±, and I still have a pool of Qi to work through. -This is my spot,- I declare to no one in my own Void. All it takes is one long nap and I¡¯ll wake up to it being a flower shop. -Imma eat those flowers.- I walk around the lake perimeter, spawning an umber bush every few dozen yards. How¡¯s that for a fence? ¡°Are you crazy? Don¡¯t plant that death around here!¡± I bristle, crouching down as one of the quartet comes at me. I turn and run, flinging fish at them as I do. I start screaming and sprinting towards the lake as the others try to flank me. This is my void! Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do, when and where after you destroyed my stuff?! I was trying to save you, you ungrateful bastards! I¡¯m not even setting up near you! -Assholes!- I scream when I realize they¡¯re banking the fish once they¡¯re in range to get smacked by them. I grumble, still running and dropping bushes while I revoke their permissions. It really is just an effort of will. No banking for you! See if I don¡¯t stop you from withdrawing! I shift over to where my house used to be and Red pops right over. I gasp, indignant that this bitch is using my system to hunt me down in my void. -Not today!- I scream, narrowing my eyes and shifting up. -Dumbass!- I deny the request for me to transfer over to Red, just hovering and daring them to try that shit again. They do and it is so satisfying to see them realize they fucked up. Not even a breath later Red¡¯s back, still looking horrified at their self-imposed falling simulator. They can get to where I am, sure, but they can¡¯t get to me. Another beat and they¡¯re back, flailing and still horrified. I settle in, wondering how they have to make the request that it takes time for it to go through. Although, to be fair, when I want to change something I have to sort my thoughts out and then think of what I want to happen. If my thoughts were a repeating litany of ¡°Oh, shit¡± I might have a hard time thinking ¡°Go here¡±, too. I wonder if the others have a way to help. I could literally just move over to --. Red drops down on me from above. I curse and thrash, telling them to piss off while trying to shake them loose. I don¡¯t have to go anywhere and they can¡¯t get a good grip. I was still waking up before, but my grubby trap ass has defenses when I¡¯m awake. Well, more than bite me and die so I can eat you. ¡°What is wrong with you?¡± Red bellows. Did they really? I latch on to them, spinning until I¡¯m holding them, then fling them towards where my house used to be. [Body Slam Succcessful] [Successful Use 1/100] [Qi -25] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,475] [Current Qi: 1,811,547/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,269,962/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] -Give me back my house!- I shout, transferring to them and slamming them so that they scrape along the fields, tearing up the crops even more. -You change my lands, destroy my home, get rid of all of my food, and try to order me around?! This is my void! The Council rules out there, but here you answer to me!- ¡°I liked it better when it was asleep,¡± the smallest robed figure quips as the others finally catch up and try to help Red. -You did not.- Imma ¡®bout to fuck up their shit. My shit. Fack! Public Posts TL;DR Public polls on Patreon, and will be going back to posting Spoiled 5x a week until I run out of my backlog, and then it''s going on hiatus until i get back to it. End of TL;DR Short Story Long I have a couple of public polls set up on patreon to get information regarding how people who read my stories feel about them, or for why people who opt out opt out. Mostly I assume my writing''s bad, not engaging, and that I''m the nosey asshole that wants to know how the super powerful person became super powerful, when the hell they had time to practice a skill 5 thousand times, when they sleep, eat, where the bathroom facilities are and how they avoid politics if all they''re doing is daydreaming about people who don''t know they exist or are so far out of their league it''s offensive and disrespectful when they''re weak get out of training asses turn MVP and they bullshit their way, on a one off, into out ranking people who perform god tier level across the board regularly. You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. I may have been that kid that had to get all As, got punished for Bs and then watched as my siblings were rewarded for going from Ds to Cs. I may also be that person that takes shit super seriously. If any of this is a surprise to you, you''ve clearly not been reading any of my work XD Or it might make more sense to you now >. > Anywho, yeah, polls on Patreon, public polls, and will be going back to posting Spoiled 5x a week until I run out of my backlog, and then it''s going on hiatus until i get back to it. Spoiled V Ch.3 I¡¯m better than this. I take a deep breath, try not to let these fuckers rile me more than they have. Yes, I brought them here, but they¡¯re more than capable now. Time to kick them out of the nest. I transfer out to see what state the apartment is in, and I¡¯m standing on a bowl shaped padded wicker chair with a large quilted woven cushion. The apartment, pretentious in white with red or gold trim, is a lot bigger than I remember it being. Pretty sure it was a weird square courtyard build with windows in the center, but this feels more like a large hall with rooms along the edges. I settle down on the chair to see if it¡¯s comfortable or stable, -- it is, -- then hop down and bump into a ward. There¡¯s tons of people here, there¡¯s weird bug pinata¡¯s everywhere, the room is different, and I¡¯ve been gone for 3 years. Is it someone¡¯s birthday? -Tch!- I push through the ward, my stomach recoiling, --I did eat a lot of random shit and drink hella wine. I¡¯ll set up the mills and work on making bread. That should help.-- then wander around trying to see if I recognize anyone. So once I kick them out I have to create and plant my little farm again. I had so much stuff, and I have no idea where it all went. Who were they talking to on the other side? Was the bed and shield to keep me in or keep people out? Did they sell my shit and upgrade the apartment? This place is huge. It feels less like a multi-room apartment common area, and more like a reception hall. I keep looking, but none of these people look familiar, and there are so many people holding little bug kites with tribal jaws on them. There are a lot of hunans dressed in thick, colorful over robes, and very few people with hunan-forms bearing animal characteristics. Is this a fund-raiser? Fuck, is this an auction? Are these people here to buy my shit through the --. I wonder where Trinity is. ¡°This is it!¡± I look up to see Hatchet and another woman looming over me, loudly whispering to one another. -Do you kn--,- I¡¯m interrupted by the other woman scooping me up and the two racing to a set of large double doors painted bright red. When they pass through we¡¯re out on an external walkway on a tower in a scenic mountain. It feels like spring, there are more gaudy red trimmed towers in our surroundings, and the women are running like they stole me. -Are you kidnapping me?- I just woke up, I already have to deal with the four bears, so there¡¯s no way that this is happening again. ¡°Kidnap who? We¡¯ve got a quest we need you for,¡± Hatchet snaps, grumbling that if they could do the task themselves they wouldn¡¯t bother trying to find me to help. -I didn¡¯t sign up for a quest.- I just got out here to evict some other assholes imposing on me and she wants to try? Does she even have merit to burn? ¡°Shut up,¡± Hatchet says, the girl carrying me still hasn¡¯t said a word, although her eyes are darting between me and Hatchet and our surroundings. -Put me down,- I tell the girl. How much merit do I need in order to see names again? I could check --. ¡°It wants me to let it go,¡± the girl whispers. Ooh, boy, she sounds lost. ¡°Don¡¯t you dare!¡± Hatchet whisper hisses at the girl as they keep power walking. Down a level, winding path, -- this place is beautiful. It¡¯s so scenic with the flowering trees, and all the undeveloped land. -- through the wooded foothills, -- my void totally would have looked like this if it didn¡¯t get leveled, -- and out of some random red, free standing doorway, -- I feel disgust as I realize it¡¯s a gate, but the disgust is at myself for some reason? -- and then we¡¯re out in town. -Wait,- I twist around to see that we¡¯re standing outside Eager Heart. -What the fuck?- Hatchet slaps me in the face which causes me to turn around and look at her in shock, -- I can literally end her at any time, -- I¡¯ve been nothing but polite so far, -- then, -- while cursing me quietly, -- she throws a piece of cloth over my head. They¡¯re ¡°not¡± kidnapping me, and she¡¯s trying to hide me so no one sees I¡¯m out why? What the fuck is happening? Eager Heart looked like some brothel crossed with a mall before. The inside of that place got a massive glow up. When we get to wherever these two are taking me, I¡¯m soul sucking Hatchet. Dunno if the lady carrying me is smart enough to keep her mouth shut or not, pretty sure she¡¯s not onboard with whatever the hell Hatchet is trying to do, but she¡¯s also just waiting to be told what to do. Down to the piers while I try to figure out what the hells¡¯ changed for me. A nice long boat ride where quiet girl hugs me close like I¡¯m a bag of unmentionables, -- she¡¯s embarrassed that they kidnapped me or embarrassed that they¡¯re hiding it, or something else? -- and Hatchet runs preemptive interference on a couple of guys who try to flirt with the poor girl. So I¡¯ve been drinking Qi and leaking for 3 years, but the apartment wasn¡¯t poisoned. If anything it looks like I tried to add it to my void or my void bled over to their void. Huh. Food log¡­ They¡¯ve been feeding me fish and blood, -- tch! -- but nothing poisonous. So they¡¯ve been bleeding for me but they treat me as some random pest instead of a god ¨C lowercase ¡°g¡±, I know who I am, ¨C? How¡¯s that work? What changed besides me waking up and asking why they got rid of my shit? I shift to get comfortable and get to see a couple of people recoil. Did they really think I was just a bag of laundry? Tch! Where was I¡­? So, that¡¯s foods¡­ Requests¡­? They¡¯ve requested meat a lot, but I didn¡¯t have any, but I did have fish so I apparently just started dumping fish on them. Oh, wow, tons of minor healing, probably from fish bones and minor injuries. I¡¯ll check more in-depth later, ¡®cause this healing thing is new to me. I remember wanting to fix what I broke, but I guess I never turned it off¡­ The boat makes periodic stops, the people closest to us either running off or scooting farther away as seats free up. It¡¯s kinda funny to see people smile at the two women, sit down, get harangued by Hatchet, then freak out when I make any noise or move at all. The scenery isn¡¯t too distracting, just rocky beach, forest, or thin grass, but we¡¯ve been on this boat long enough for me to fumble around and actually find shit. Where do I look to see what¡¯s been pulled in and out of my void? Did you know this text is from a different site? Read the official version to support the creator. -Ack!- The lady carrying me stands up with no warning, just following Hatchet as she disembarks on a grassy shore. The quiet one apologizes, but Hatchet just keeps marching angrily off into the woods. -I do not want you to be alarmed, but I don¡¯t know what I¡¯m doing here, and I¡¯m disinclined to assist,- I tell the quiet one directly. ¡°There¡¯s a legend of a powerful sorceror who was seen in this area, and we think we found the artifact,¡± the woman says chipperly. In her outside voice, rendering my attempt at stealth utterly moot. ¡°Shut up!¡± Hatchet storms back and hisses at the woman before storming away again. -She¡¯s not very intelligent if she thinks she¡¯s going to keep this hidden.- I can be subtle. I said she¡¯s not going to be able to hide her actions, not that she was going to be killed an eaten. By me. And possibly the bears. I don¡¯t know if they know they eat hunans. That brings up another point. Will I get in trouble for feeding them hunan flesh? Or is it fine as long as they don¡¯t go on murderous rampages? Why¡¯d I make fish? I had some deer examples, and I made fish. It worked out, but how much would things have changed if I¡¯d made deer? But why didn¡¯t I make deer? Or boars for that matter. Could¡¯ve introduced the bears to pork chops and bacon. Why the hell am I thinking about doing anything for those literal home wreckers? -Hey!- I kick, miss, and fall into a miasma filled hole as Hatchet grabs the fabric from the quiet lady and shakes me out. She didn¡¯t try to catch me or anything. ¡°Hurry and clear the miasma!¡± Hatchet snaps as I look up at her. I turn and walk down a small tunnel as she whisper shouts threats at me. I¡¯m not doing shit. I¡¯m gonna eat her eventually, she¡¯s not getting back on that boat, but until then, what was worth her life? I remember a time when she feared me and had a healthy respect for how dangerous I was. What in the hells happened? [Purification (Miasma Abosrption) Succcessful] [Successful Use 30/100] [Qi 10] [Karma 1000] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,167/23,817,578] [Current Qi: 1,812,052/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 95,270,312/107,275,977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] I pick up a weird plaque set into the ground, the miasma seeming to pour from it, sucking on the miasma it pumps out while not doing anything to the dense fog of the crap already filling this small area. -Hmm?- I keep drinking my No mist and wonder when I got credit for Mias--. There was that whole thing with the failed mega-meditation place. Ate a whole forest sea of miasma and a moon-sized geode of the stuff, nevermind the jelly, and I just kinda ¡°meh¡± the whole experience. When¡¯d I start paying attention to my notifications? I think after I drank Howl. He cares. I need to find out how to go through his shit better. -The fuck?- I just notice -- as I¡¯m sitting and waiting to see what Hatchet does to force my cooperation, -- that there¡¯s something in the ground, poking up through the dirt. I scrape the dirt away to find a knife that appears to be made of metal shaped like it¡¯s a snapped bone, two knobs on one end, an uneven chipped blade on the other. -And banked,- I say as I store it. [Dig Succcessful] [Successful Use 1/100] [Qi -3] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831167/23817576] [Current Qi: 1812049/957945100] [Current Karma: 95270307/107275977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] I dig around, banking the miasma plaque, and find what I guess was a weird metal stone display stand, which I also bank. I have no idea how this tunnel stayed uncollapsed when the earth is this soft and easy to dig through, although there are a lot of roots I¡¯m easily clawing through, so maybe nevermind? [Dig Succcessful] [Successful Use 2/100] [Qi -3] [Karma -5] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831167/23817575] [Current Qi: 1812046/957945100] [Current Karma: 95270302/107275977] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,687R,179Da,155De,105k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680St] -Now what?- I stop what I¡¯m doing, wondering why I¡¯m getting notifications sporadically and why the numbers feel off. Is it all the money? What¡¯s my current Will? Part of me -- a part of me that feels like sweaty spreadsheet nerd, i.e. Silent Howl, -- tells me that my numbers occasionally dip and rise by small amounts from naturally existing or when someone¡¯s remoting into me, which would be fascinating if it was only natural living. -Pretty sure some asshole is spying on me without my permission, though,- I grumble to myself, further hollowing out my little burrow. -Come again?- I¡¯m sitting and looking around what I¡¯m totally thinking of as the living room, wondering when the fuck I started this little project, and it finally occurs to me that the shouting I¡¯m hearing outside has a lot more bass in it. -Tch, I was supposed to in the forest with a straw that bitch...- I shake my head in disappointment that I didn¡¯t do a subtle kill her in the woods, and no one find out for years. I move up a slope I dug out, -- how long was I down here? -- to the exit, and look up. There¡¯s a bald man with dots on his head, wearing black robes with a yellow and white checker fabric folded over as a sash, holding a script paper, and part of me thinks I shouldn¡¯t be sitting here staring at him. He shouts, flinging the script paper which hits me in the face, my forehead tingling as it explodes into sparks and then I¡¯m pulled out of the hole, flung into the air and I land straddling a small crowd. That¡¯s why. I sit down and look at my death claws. They¡¯re serrated again. Looking kinda vicious. At least they¡¯re not hooks anymore. I look down and poke myself on the tree tops of the trees I¡¯m not crushing under me thinking that I¡¯m sitting on leaf litter and sticks. I open my wings, the sky fills with eyes. I can simultaneously see that the sky fills with shimmering prisms of essence, -- turning all oil slick and miasma-y ¨C but I don¡¯t see eyes in the air. Is this my new field of influence? I don¡¯t have to silk spray any more? -Sweet,- I close my wings, flex my forelimbs, then look down to see who all is here. -Oh,- I feel myself crunching down as I take on my hunan form. Ack! ¡°That was unpleasant,¡± I grumble, straightening my robes and stretching. ¡°Eclipsed Rainbow?¡± I look up to see Freckles looking at me with his mouth hanging open. ¡°Sup,¡± I blink at him. They came for me, right? Or are they here for Hatchet? Speaking of, where the fuck is she? I look around trying to spy her in the crowd and see the quiet girl before I catch Hatchet ducking away into the crowd. ¡°You¡¯re huge!¡± Freckles crows, flinging his hands up and flinching as he nearly knocks a few people out. ¡°I told you I was,¡± I say as I tuck my hands into my sleeves and move towards where Hatchet is trying to hide behind people. ¡°Hatchet dumped me into a miasma hole, among other things. She¡¯s not allowed to leave,¡± I tell him before the bald man with script papers jabs me in the face with another paper. ¡°Yeah, I have no idea how the last one worked,¡± I tell him before moving around him, snatching the paper from him and eating it. Snack things. ¡°Hatchet?¡± Freckles stammers as I move past Quiet, she smiles and waves chipperly as I walk past her, so I give a little wave back. ¡°Um¡­¡± I poke at Memory ¡®o Silent Howl who offers up a name and a face that¡¯s pale and uncertain. ¡°¡®Singing Swallow¡¯? This lady helped,¡± I say, jabbing a thumb at Quiet and wondering why Hatchet is smart enough to hide in the crowd instead of running away, but dumb enough to piss me off in the first place. ¡°Flowers At Sunset?¡± Freckles looks heartbroken. No way he doesn¡¯t know how simple this girl is. ¡°You tried to kill Sandy?¡± ¡°The fuck? No!¡± I whip around and stare at him, brows furrowed in horror. ¡°Hatchet kidnapped me for something, and used ¨C. Flowers, was it?¡± I look to the girl who was shaking her head no at Freckles before nodding her head in the affirmative to my question. ¡°Kept hitting me and telling this girl not to talk to me. I¡¯m gonna eat Hatchet. That¡¯s not open for discussion.¡± ¡°Eclipsed Rainbow, she stole you from us, she was going to die regardless of if you did it or not,¡± Freckles says seriously and I wonder who the fuck he thinks he is. Stole me from them? ¡°Stole me? You don¡¯t own me! I¡¯m a member of your group, not a treasure, not a toy, not a pet,¡± I glare at him in disapproval and disappointment. ¡°Sorry, but when your essence began to leak out and affect Eager Heart we had to send for an Exorcist,¡± Freckles grimaces apologetically. I¡¯m not gonna like this. ¡°They said you were an Imperial Treasure, from the Rising Sun Empire. You¡¯ve been registered as Running River¡¯s property.¡± ¡°What did you just say to me.¡± I don¡¯t like my chances of kicking his ass --. I stop as it occurs to me that, one, I have a pass to kill Hatchet, and two, I don¡¯t need to fight Freckles. I need to find Nate. Spoiled V-VI Cello! TL;DR Volumes V and VI available on Amazon, not KU, before VI even gets a chance to post on RR. So, what had happened was... Got inspired on VI, made a whole outline in like a day, usually I just have a rough idea of the events I want to happen and then I have to figure out how to get there, paused on editing V in order to get it out, and got almost all the way through VI before starting editing on V, then ended up finishing VI before V finished posting on RR. Unauthorized use: this story is on Amazon without permission from the author. Report any sightings. So still posting V but already publishing V and VI on amazon, so they''re not on KU. Same rules for every volume. Posting rough edit on RR and Patreon, books edited and formated for publication (hopefully) with tables and colors since I''m not talented enough to draw and make fun images to add. Used to have the rough tables on RR, but having 3-4 different versions of every chapter...? Patreon has full VI rough edit available until KU, but will be posting on RR near the end of Febuary to give reading time on V before it goes to KU. Then VI will be posting on RR, then after a week or two or more after it finishes on RR it will be taken down for KU. End of Book V Just a reminder that Spoiled V is up in its entirety. You can read it free on RR then wait and read it on AmazonKU in a week or two. Or you can buy it now. Book is reformatted, minor mistakes corrected, and edited to be a book. There will be slight changes as some scenes are fleshed out or chapters are restructured, same as before. What goes on Patreon and RoyalRoad are rough edits and rough drafts. Hopefully you enjoy the story. This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there. Spoiled V will be stubbed near the end of February, kicked up to KU, and then Spoiled VI rough drafts and rough edits will start posting on RoyalRoad. They are currently available on Patreon and Spoiled VI is already published to Amazon, but not Kindle Unlimited. Once it finishes posting it will undergo the same process. A window where the rough edit can be fully viewed free of charge on Royal Road, or you can read it on Patreon before it finished posting on Royal Road, then it will be stubbed after a public grace period and go on to Amazon Kindle Unlimited. Spoiled VII is just called Devourer, the story and the name are a Work In Progress, but over 10 chapters already up on Patreon for anyone interested. Spoilers but not *** This rant will continue to grow. This is not a "See Spot run. Run, Spot, run. Spot likes to run. Spot runs everywhere." book series. This is a "what the dog doing?" MC watches a dog sprinting, eyes wide and tongue lolling. Does no one else see this? "Hmm," someone follows MCs line of sight and sees the dog disappear down the street. "Oh, that''s Spot. That dog has way too much energy." series. Same thing. Things will happen. You''re reading what is happening not being told what to think or feel. You get to decide that for yourself. You want to encourage spot? Go for it. You don''t give a fuck about spot? Cool. There will be cultivation and progression clich¨¦s. MC does not know them. If you don''t know them you will miss them. If you do know them, keep an eye out for "easter eggs". MC learns about the shiz later. And sometimes forgets. Because there is a lot~. *** First off: All books will be stubbed after they finish their run on RR and get posted to Amazon Kindle Unlimited. Several pages, single spaced, reformatted, with proper paragraphs! (And tables to the best I could manage) only, maybe 3-4 rough chapters will be left on RR. There should be a disclaimer and the chapters are numbered so you should be able to tell what book you''re in and where. The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" stuff is. And those chapters are marked B2. For Book 2. And on the fiction page they should have a nifty little section with a different cover. That''s what some of those weird cover chapters with images were about. Because: The beginning of book two is where all the "hey book one was published, and book two as well!" For those of you who got it the first time, this is for the people in the front who tuned out then went "hey! No one acts like MC!" Correct. Book 2 is more cultivation and progression than litrpg. But this is a series. These things come and go and there''s a ranking system. An actual ranking system within the system and depending on what you rank in, or with whom, you will have access to nifty stuff. Being the emperor''s friend is much better than owning your own house. Because it''s the emperor of the empire versus a piece of property somewhere within said empire. For additional books you''ll get to join MC as they notice that they''re labeled as a badass with no combat ability and they find out why later. (Ranking Systems? Plural? For Different classes and abilities? There are classes?!) -.- We good? Cool. If not? I don''t know what to tell you. I''m trying not to Chronicles of Riddick you. The second version. I''m all over the first one where you get to figure out the story yourself, not the extended versions where they have random chick in fur bikini tell you everything up front and keep repeating it over and over ruining every twist and turn. And then recapping to make sure you''re not enjoying yourself. ALL the spoilers. But not really, because these parts are already published. For the entire fookin'' published series. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) Posting this as a separate comment because it''s not the first time I answered this, but people keep deleting their comments after I explain. (Repeated for your enjoyment.) (Edit: A year later and KU a thing, this did not age well. Initially it was people deleting comments. After it was me taking down chapters for KU. Did not. Age well... Still visible!) I swear some of the reviews were written to help explain the things so people wouldn''t be confused. And then there''s another comment! That mysteriously disappears, ''cause fack all the time I spend answering and anyone else who might have the same question. And gonna make this a separate chapter, I suppose. (Repeated for your enjoyment.)(Edit: solid, room temp, former milk.) /Synopsis/Recap Literally the leader of the empire goes, oh neat, there''s another god tier person here. Then wtf is this because he doesn''t understand wtf Kisandera is doing grooming and making silk and eating garbage. MC is ignorant of the way things work. Other people are taking advantage of that. Or they think it''s just some OP treasure/bot with nonsensical, poorly programmed reactions. I tried to make this clear without just saying it based on how other people aren''t taking MC serious despite all the weird shit they can do. Their reactions and responses verbal and non-verbal. Fail, I guess. I even put it in the book description... WTF. Their attacks and the things they use the most keep updating and evolving. They keep unlocking new shit. They just don''t get personalized notifications or know how to access the notification system, and then they lost permission to do it at will, then they regained it, muted it, turned it back on and they don''t stop thinking just because they''ve got text in the corner so. I ramble about this. In book. Sometimes MC doesn''t care and then has to go back and check what happened. You as the reader might remember, the other characters hint that they do or flat out tell the MC, MC still doesn''t always care. MC is literally that one person who plays a game, says it''s garbage, doesn''t know what they''re doing, refuses to check the wiki because all the stuff should be in game already, lucks into some amazing bullshit, then you find out later they didn''t know they could use a backpack. Or that there''s a skill list. Or waypoints. Or a reputation shop. Or any of the things that make the game playable. Hells. A crafting interface! Many characters keep telling them how much OP dragonshit they keep doing, try to get over the envy, then try to explain to Kisandera that there''s a lot of stuff they need to pay attention to that they''re not even looking at. There''s a tutorial. That''s how everyone else knows this basic shit. Kisandera keeps timing out of it by SLEEPING while they cycle. The closed door cultivation is a thing. The gaining insight while meditating is a thing. Sometimes they stumble on new insights while rambling in their head, but there''s a fully interactive world the other people (not npcs but some people are built different) are getting access to and learning from that Kisandera is managing to avoid. The whole "we can see it when you see it" then kIsandera going wow, how are they learning all this shit? Then napping some more. This is why the system is trolling them. It is personal. It is a set of rules everyone has to follow and anyone who doesn''t is punished. But Sandy isn''t exploiting, it just looks like they are and they''re getting punished for it. At one point in time they learned how to silence the notifications or set them to important only. Then ignored them. On purpose. And called them annoying. Then started moping ''cause they didn''t know how to get them back. They didn''t mute them. They got turned off. They have to turn them back on again. Then they lost permission because their rank wasn''t high enough to access the cool shiz. They''ve barely got an understanding of how permissions work but know they can customise some stuff. Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings. The Essence miasma thing is a character alteration item with a 90% chance to pull a "wish granted". It''s why people avoid the shit out of it. You want radiant skin? Congratulations, you''re radioactive. When they (Kisandera) keep mutating it''s because their idle thoughts of "I want to be able to do this turn" into "congrats, you''ve unlocked". There''s a 10% chance you''ll get what you want, and a 1% chance you''ll get it the way you want it. Yes, this is a reference to loot boxes and shitty RNG when they lie about the chances of you getting a super rare item. Regard gives you the glowy angel look, Resentment gives you the demonic shadows and smoke thing. Back to MC doing something they''ve been doing and it suddenly changes. That''s them unlocking a new version of the skill, ranking up or straight up getting premium access due to accidentallying into helping out the empire. And it takes them by surprise because they don''t read notifications. Sometimes they remember to check their Logs, most of the time they just keep doing what they''re doing. Miasma doesn''t change skills, it only changes appearance. Dude wants tiger hands. Chance he''ll just grow harder nails, chance he''ll get human hands that look like tiger paws but aren''t, chance his hands will get stronger and look tiger-y and be tiger-y, chance he''ll actually get anthro tiger hands that are super awesome. Then he''ll have access to developing tiger claw attacks, doesn''t just give them. Miasma doesn''t give him access to the skills. Having the claws and learning to use them will. What else to rant about? MC has access to their logs but other people read faster than them. The logs are there. Will always be there. Whether or not Kisandera loses permission to go to them doesn''t affect other people''s permissions to access them through Sandy unless that person loses access to Kisandera''s logs. That there is an exploit but there are very few people who can Read so that''s a thing. Back to trolly system thing. There is the option to just know what''s in the logs versus searching for lines, or looking at spreadsheets (what? you can change view? even into lists?), but there''s also the option to integrate the logs into memory. MC does this almost instinctively, bug instinct hack, with things they eat, hence gaining rip off spider abilities or dragon scale. Example: MC could produce silk already, MC is a moth thing with hair and scales, eating them didn''t unlock the skill so much as having the tools available already and learning a new way to use them. So could eat dragon, no scales? no dragon scale skills. Want breathe fire? No fire essence? No breathe fire for you! If a skill requires a prompt to be acknowledged then Sandy usually auto closes the annoying window so misses it. That''s where Silent Howl was able to shape Sandy''s development. MC started off with a spatial realm that they thought was just a spatial storage/bank, the box inventory interface was a display of what was in the space not the space itself. When they went into the outer space starry galaxy area and built a storage facility, that was them actually building into the spatial realm. Spatial realm is like the in game housing system where you take a portal to a private area you can customize. To a point. Most people need a treasure (insert key), Kisandera uses essence and "materials" from things they''ve eaten. They ate void, became void based (added to versus full change), then they expanded into bank and spatial bug when those are supposed to be exclusive specializations. They can also make shit if they have the right materials for it. They can convert essence into materials. They can''t make things without getting a certain amount of it and knowing what it is. So no epic god tier weapons just because. Funny thing is the Seven Moons entry exam/tutorial had some bootleg copies to impress students with enough in all the tools gathered to actually make a nugget of star metal to start actually producing it but nobody knows that yet XD. Those flying black weapons that kisandera stole weren''t just steel. They were just mostly steel. Which isn''t all steel. And all the treasures they found on the ground were things dropped by other students that were supposed to be hidden from normal sight and collected later but no one wanted to pick up trash so the elders missed some really good shiz that Sandy yoinked. Those games where you get rewarded for throwing away trash? Those advanced players that drop advanded items that are garbage to them but you''re using tutorial island nonsense? All things have value. Seven Moons Exam Explanation for those who didn''t catch it!! Inside the exam where there was a field of flowers that come from different places and have different elements and if you get too close or interact directly with them you get affected by them are gathering points for all the loot of all the students that died. The blue crystal kisandera found is concentrated Qi. Crystalized Qi. What from the people who dead and the plants. Cycles Qi in the area helping it be the psychotic mishmash it is without turning into a miasma dense hellscape. They find several jade stones. Storage stones, that are all the jade storages that were dumped during the exam. People with permission, instructors sent to retrieve so and so''s storage because their clan/family paid for it to be returned, can break off pieces of it with storage intact. Kisandera wasn''t supposed to be able to see the treasure piles and ends up just stealing them which increased their rank ''cause obviously they''re not common to be able to pull that shit off. Yes, this will piss off a lot of people who will try to subtly make things worst for Kisandera. Kisandera used a waypoint they didn''t know about. The shortcut in the trap house? That''s a maintenance tunnel to help reset the traps. Their OP void accessing permissions let them access spatial shit. Period. They have a built in master key/transport pass. Bug them knows this. They them do not. Bug them is a fookin'' insect and unable to communicate other than to do or not do. Kisandera is an unobservant, non-animal friendly person who just goes, oh, ew, why''d I do that? Void Step, mutations, the ability to consume and reproduce items, gaining Karma for doing trash quests and Karma as experience and the basis for their god-tier growth. Grows slow but grows big. Relationships People are interested in one another. There are breeders out there on top of people who get dragged to the world. And there are people being dragged from other worlds to that world and other worlds. That whole divergent timeline thing some people experience is a fell into a slightly different world versus a massively different world thing. So, moving on... This is a slice of life (edit: more like cozy) series. A long running, from birth to finish, (Godhood? You really think so?) (edit: Technically...), story about a person who was reborn into a place they have no love for. As far as everyone else in the world is concerned their lack of knowledge, or very specific limited knowledge, makes them a talking treasure. Not even an NPC. A chatty tool. The other characters aren''t (edit: all) NPCs. The NPCs are the one-offs stuck in a loop. You will notice them if you''re looking for them. They don''t do much, are highly specialized, and they don''t do much else. It''s easy to know where they''ll be and what they''ll be doing. (edit: initially. In the noob zones. Unless people are retired) Some people will try to live that NPC life, merchants and cozy lovers, but then they get home and take the costume off. Am I going to tell you who they are? Nope. Can you guess? If you want. Will you be right? Sometimes. A routine doesn''t equal a script. There''s a difference. Questions? Ask away. Just... Don''t delete the comment after I answer because that gets rid of the answer, too. (Edit: You can after I update this. Comment will eventually go with the series, but lemme update this first, plx) I will add to this as needed. Other people might be stuck on the same question. Imagine a world without wikis and FAQs. And you will be the MC. (Edit: Technically...) Imagine if you don''t care until it becomes life threatening. MC energy. Repeated for your enjoyment. Spoiled VI Chapter One I wake up, have a breakfast of grilled eel, rice, soup dumplings, dipping sauces and drizzles, and tea. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I leave my void into the resentment swirling around the room, shove aside several shredded robes that were piled to block my anchor, sigh as I look around, and note that there are people meditating. I nudge one of the cloth scraps before banking the lot. The beds look like shit, the floor looks filthy, so I pull out a seating cushion and kneel on that to meditate on. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot -1 -Ghost] [Ghost Pot (+100/-1)] [3 x1 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +482660/-143236] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,253,845] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 96990157/107275977] Ooh! Free spirits... Wait... Why do I have stuff in my Pot? ¡°Hey.¡± I flinch, -- like a bitch! I didn¡¯t know there was anything to steal, -- and look up to see someone standing in the cave entrance. They wave for me to follow them, and I look around to see if this is a trap or not. They suck their teeth and stop blocking the door, leaning against the wall with their arms and ankles crossed. ¡°The best way to get spirits and resentment is to go back into the graveyard. Some people take bones or corpses and bury them under their beds until they can add the ghost to their spirit reserve,¡± the man continues, walking over and dropping into a squat next to me. ¡°There are groups that will take you back to the graveyard. ¡°Find a mausoleum, find an intact body, grab it then come back and practice, hmm?¡± the man nods his head, pats me on the knee, stands up and leaves. That was... unusual. Makes just enough sense to be a good trap. But I¡¯ve got stuff here. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x0 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +490860/-145056] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24256653] [Current Qi: 1905520/957945100] [Current Karma: 97026612/107275977] ¡°You purified the room. You might want to leave before they realize it was you.¡± I wake up, cracking one eye open, expecting to see Fuck Face kneeling before me, but I just clearly see an empty room. There¡¯s a thin fog leaking into the barracks cave with its shitty straw beds from the doorway, but the air in the room is clear. Hmm... He¡¯s right. Time to go. I climb to my feet, placing one hand on the ground, -- instant regret, -- to push myself up. I dust myself off, bank my cushion, and idly walk out of the cave surprised that no one tried to mess with me in my sleep. I didn¡¯t mean to nod off. Honest. I wander around, following the stone paths, looking for something to give me a clue as to where I am. I probably could have tried to retrace my footsteps, but I don¡¯t know how to use the markers. It¡¯d be pretty bad to assume that they work like the transfer scripts, ¡®cause I¡¯m pretty sure these people would have been hunted down already if they did. No. Wait. Outsiders need keys for transfer scripts, and the sect power shit with Resentment. Would a script key work? I snort and keep walking. Like I even know what a script key looks like. Closest I¡¯ve gotten to one was the keyed portal in Eager Hearts, and the void key I took from the rando in the Three Kings cave. Ah! The General¡¯s son! Whatever happened about that? I keep walking as I tick off what I remember. Modesty was kidnapped, I rekt their base, I nearly rekt them at the Gates, I fought and ate my first spider Monarch, and... I remember going back to Seven Moons and there was a ton of bullshit. I finally got in, something happened, I woke up later, more stuff happened, the triplets and Shimmering Steel used up my reputation to get stuff --. ¡°Fuck it!¡± I throw my hands up. Whatever happened was probably already resolved and they can go fack themselves. ¡°Hey! Did you want transport to the graveyard?¡± I¡¯m snapped out of my idle thinking to see someone in a group of people, all of them dressed in the black sleeveless robe top and loose pants that I swear the lower disciples of the Red Spider Sect wore. I point at myself but someone from behind me shoves past with an apology, -- I¡¯m literally standing in the middle of the path. What the fuck is wrong with me? And no one shoved past me before? -- and joins the group. I shuffle over to join them and watch as the person who pushed past me hands over a little black stone, similar to the ones the markers are made of. ¡°It¡¯s 10 Resentment for transport,¡± the hawker says slyly, and I feel like this is a trap, but how...? ¡°If you¡¯ve made it this far you¡¯ve trapped a few spirits, hmm? You meditate and you can get resentment from them easier than meditating in Graveyards. Getting enough Resentment is proof that you¡¯ve got what it takes to make it here. ¡°We take you back to the Graveyards? You can get more spirits. More meditation for more Resentment. You can easily afford to make it there. When you come back you¡¯re all set.¡± ¡°How do I pay for things with Resentment?¡± I ask, looking at him with suspicion ¡®cause he¡¯s super suspicious. ¡°If you don¡¯t have Resentment, we will accept 1 spirit stone,¡± the smarmy git says. He looks so reasonable and not weasely at all. Handsome people are the worst. He¡¯s clean, well-spoken, clean shaven, well put together... Does he actually have any talent? That¡¯s not fair if he looks good, has his shit together, and has talent... [-1 Spirit Stone] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10680 -1 St] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +486860/-145056] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,256,653] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,026,612/107,275,977] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,697R,179Da,258De,2605k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10679St] I hand over a spirit stone, glaring sullenly at his bright smile and his manners as he politely thanks me with a bow. ¡°It¡¯s hard to come across outside currency, so this will really help out. Who wants to stay cooped up in the caves all day?¡± he says jokingly, with his real laugh lines around his eyes, his skin smoothing as he smiles and shows his clean, not weirdly sized, straight teeth. I¡¯m onto you... The Hawker and a few other disciples make sure we¡¯re all within a circle drawn on the ground, telling everyone to stay close. We¡¯re told that if we want to get back, just look for markers made with Resentment, and someone will probably be by soon. Then I¡¯m standing alone in the graveyard with no idea how to tell if markers are made of Resentment or just dark, pocked stone without messing them up, and no clue where the hells I am. -Pretty sure I didn¡¯t want to be here because I didn¡¯t like it, so why did I come back?- I snap at no one. I could blame Fuck Face? He didn¡¯t try to dissuade me, and I¡¯m pretty sure he has a way to talk to me when we¡¯re apart. -Speaking of,- I roll my head in preparation for the shouting match I¡¯m about to start, heading to my Logs for proof that he¡¯s communicating with me somehow, and then see that he¡¯s been farming and he just harvested something I think I got from the Death Moths. -Oh! Granin!- The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement. I forgot all about them! I¡¯m supposed to help grow stuff so they can have more seeds to work with. Shit! How long have I been gone? I transfer with an image of Granin in the caves, and wind up next to him as he overlooks some goblin infants into mixing shit and dirt to prepare the farm caves. I try to jump onto Granin¡¯s shoulders when the kids squeal in excitement upon noticing me, accept my fate as the fuckers lift off and come at me, and glare at Granin who is laughing his ass of instead of trying to help as the kids wipe their shitty, possibly sticky, hands, and slimy, snotty noses on my beautiful robes. -I came to let you know that Fuck Face has gotten the first harvest,- I sigh. Do I really owe the Death Moths anything? I could go and find someone else to drink with, surely. I wave to present Fuck Face as they tell me to hold on, that they need to get the basket of produce, leaving me standing with my head cocked waving at nothing like a dumbass. -You go by ¡°Fuck Face¡± now?- Granin asks with a polite curiosity. Oh, he laughs at the flying shit stains, but that sounds serious to him? -No!- I snap, still unamused. I want to change my robes, but I just know that some of the kids will look at it as a way to do a better job of cleaning themselves. ¡°There¡¯s bitter gourd,¡± Fuck Face says, presenting a head-sized watermelon for inspection. The adult Death Moths lose their shit. Guess they like watermelon. When Granin takes the melon and cuts into it, once he¡¯s split the rind, the inside of the melon looks like potato. He cuts off a sliver, tries it, nods, then cuts off a sliver for me to try, ignoring Fuck Face completely. I take a bite, the texture is like crisp cucumber, and the flavor is bittersweet, but not entirely unpleasant. -The sows told you about this. Cook it like bamboo shoots, not fruit. It¡¯s very fibrous,- Granin tells me, taking another sliver before putting the cut melon back in Fuck Face¡¯s basket and gesturing for me to follow him. I look at Fuck Face, but he doesn¡¯t say a word, just gestures for me to follow Granin. We make our way down to the kitchens, Granin and I getting berated by Old Granny, -- who ignores Fuck Face, -- and then we¡¯re shooed out. She yells for us to bring more dragon eel, and I duck back into the kitchen to bury her under several pounds of the stuff before taking off after a cackling Granin. -So rude! Why is everyone ignoring my servant?- I finally demand once we¡¯re back in the farming cave. Fuck Face begs off, wanting back in my void, and telling me he¡¯s going to get more seeds as I glare at Granin. -Hmm?- Granin looks at where I¡¯m gesturing after Fuck Face is gone. -The corpse? If it is not for fertilizer what use is it to us? Although using it to hold items is interesting, I suppose...- He shrugs, clearly at a loss to what I¡¯m looking for as he directs the kids to keep working. Interesting take... Fuck Face lets me know he¡¯s ready to come back, and I bring him back out along with his basket of seeds that he got where? ¡°Your ¡®Persephone¡¯ bush produces lots of fruit and flowers,¡± he reminds me. He hands over the basket of seeds to Granin, who thanks me profusely, -- did people thank the triplets and Shimmering Steel like this? ¡®Cause fuck me, right? I¡¯m just the help, -- and then starts talking to the other adults while I¡¯m standing there fuming. ¡°It¡¯s not a big deal. You¡¯re still doing all of the work. I¡¯m just the delivery person.¡± The fuck am I getting angry for? He¡¯s not wrong. He did take the time to gather the produce though. ¡°I just pulled it from storage and banked it.¡± I narrow my eyes as I think that he had to till and plant the seeds. ¡°Using information from your library that you got from sharing drinks and food with the Death Moths,¡± he reminds me, all logical and understanding. Fack you, I think as hard as I can, bristling as I try to figure out who it¡¯s safe to vent on. ¡°We can bring them some of your soil suitable for farmland,¡± he suggests quietly, pointedly not looking at the shit stirrers. -Granin. Would. You like. To have. Some nice. Farmland?- I say as stiltedly and robotic as possible, Granin looking at me like I¡¯m the only one acting weird. I watch as Granin looks from me to Fuck Face slowly. Does he really think I can puppet the corpse or move, but not both? ... I want to be offended, but it¡¯s probably accurate. -Your assistance is greatly appreciated. As always,- Granin says slowly, looking at Fuck Face. This bish really thinks I¡¯m body swapping. ¡°I¡¯ll return shortly,¡± Fuck Face bows and I boot them to my void. A few moments later and Fuck Face asks me to make some basic cloth to carry the dirt. I reproduce some sheets of cotton, wondering how they¡¯re supposed to bear the weight of the dirt, and head into my Logs for that proof I was looking for earlier. Reminders? What the --? He¡¯s setting Reminders on a timer of now to talk to me. The other ghosts in my inner self? I can hear. Sometimes I mistake them for my own thoughts, Silent Howl style. Fuck Face? I have no idea why I don¡¯t listen to him. Unless I just tune him out and he gets around that with Reminders. A reminder to bring him out and he¡¯s out with sheets covered in rich soil. The adults cheer, the children look around in confusion and give half-hearted cheers, and I step back to indicate that I¡¯m not going to help. I¡¯ve got other shiz to do. I sit back and go into my Logs trying to figure out what I¡¯m supposed to do for Vengeful Ghost. Gather Resentment, and then what? [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x0 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +486860/-145692] [Max Will: 9,579,331] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24256653] [Current Qi: 1905520/957945100] [Current Karma: 97026612/107275977] -And why does that one get to sleep? Why aren¡¯t they helping?- I come to looking at one of the old biddy¡¯s giving me a death glare while ranting at Granin. -You haven¡¯t noticed that the air is lighter?- I settle in. Might as well make myself comfortable for the rant. ¡°They¡¯re purifying the anger and resentment or the dead,¡± Fuck Face says respectfully, keeping his head down, which might be the only thing that saves him from a tongue lashing when she casts him a quick glance. -Hmph!- she glares at me, but doesn¡¯t say anything. I do a long blink, and when I open my eyes she¡¯s still staring at me. Maybe the blink wasn¡¯t long enough... I start drifting off to updates ticking away like a clock. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x0 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +506960/-152027] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,272,555] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,090,222/107,275,977] ¡°We¡¯ve got the farms worked out,¡± Fuck Face says, dropping down next to me while wiping their hands clean on a square of cloth. ¡°I helped them with their fish cave. We used some of the weaker and clawless eel dragons, not the kelp, since there¡¯s no sunlight. So far they don¡¯t appear to be able to dig, and whenever they try to crawl around the tunnel the kids take great pleasure in flipping them into the air above the water. By their tails,¡± Fuck Face chuckles. -Sounds like you were busy,- I yawn and stretch, looking around a moonlit cavern. Oh, right. Hunan. -Did they move me? Where¡¯s the light coming from?- ¡°Apparently you cleared up a sort of spiritual miasma from the Resentment the Death Moths felt being trapped in these caves after leaving their home,¡± Fuck Face murmurs quietly, watching as the adults mill around this side cavern. -Mm. How¡¯d you move around the lava river?- I ask, amused, and curious, and very concerned by how much my help cost me. ¡°Lots of attempts,¡± Fuck Face says, expression and tone flat. Fack. -So we¡¯re done here?- I ask, stretching and yawning, -- again, -- while I climb to my feet. ¡°For now. We¡¯ve got the seeds planted, they¡¯ve got a whole cavern of collected water, they say that some of the eels from your void appear very interested in the eels that were already present in the cave,¡± Fuck Face says after I transfer us to my void. I hang my head, ¡®cause of course there¡¯s a problem, and he tells me after we leave. ¡°Not as food!¡± he clarifies, hands raised either defensively or to get me to stop, right as I¡¯m getting ready to turn around. His eyes dance from side to side, his hands still raised. ¡°Um... Romantically.¡± -Ah,- I nod turning away and still waking up before I fully process what he said. I whip around to look at him in disgust at the thought of scaly dragon eels, and what I¡¯m sure are some pale, slimy skinned eels, and their mutant babies. ¡°So, most of your obligations outside of kinship are satisfied. There¡¯s just the matter of rotating the crops you do know with more that you don¡¯t,¡± Fuck Face continues. -Thank you for your hard work,- I sigh, feeling a weight fall from my shoulders. I¡¯m pretty sure the Death Moths were low key relying on me for food, and I almost let them down. ¡°So what¡¯s next?¡± Fuck Face asks as I look at the randomly discarded tools scattered around. ¡°I¡¯m gonna go visit the monks that were supposed to find out if I was a threat or not,¡± I mumble. I need to raid their library, learn more ways to earn Resentment or Regard or whatever, and find out how Spring Cow¡¯s investigation is going. Fuck Face¡¯s eyes dart back and forth as they do a hesitant shuffle. What¡¯s wrong with him? He picks at his nails, I¡¯m still waiting, he looks around then back at me, and I¡¯m still waiting. ¡°Are you sure that¡¯s a good idea?¡± he says slowly. I transfer outside, transfer to the nearest library, and wind up on a script circle. I look around, wondering who¡¯s supposed to trigger it, ¡®cause it¡¯s not triggering, and notice where the carved stone bookshelves were cut loose. ¡°You bastards defaced a library!¡± I gasp in mock affront. ¡°How dare!¡± Did they know I¡¯d come back and read shit without permission, or were they just trying to catch me? A monk wonders into the room, blanket tied around his body and draped over his arm, his under robes looking well worn. He looks like he¡¯s about to ask me for assistance, and I¡¯m here to find out what¡¯s going on, and no one¡¯s activating the script circle. ¡°You know where Spring Cow is?¡± I ask, the monk looking at me with wide eyes before scanning the room slowly. ¡°Well, the monastery is closed, but a few of the monks have gone to a village to purify it,¡± the monk offers hesitantly. ¡°If you¡¯re supposed to meet someone, they might be there?¡± Spoiled VI Chapter Two ¡°How do I get there?¡± I ask, my head slowly turning away even as I try to keep my eyes on them, -- fucking why? Ultravision and I don¡¯t want to turn my head away? -- wondering why we¡¯re both acting suspicious as fack. ¡°Different script,¡± the monk says hesitantly, keeping his eyes on me while pointing back the way he came, -- literally pointing with the arm farthest from the door back at the door --. Nevermind, he¡¯s looking through the doorway. -- then looking back at me hopefully. ¡°I can take you there, if you¡¯d like.¡± ¡°That would be great,¡± I try to smile, fail, and wonder if he has a mental condition. For all I know he cultivated some crazy skill that eats intelligence and he¡¯s still coherent. I follow him as he quickly shuffles down really narrow halls and through really short doors, -- is this place to teach humility or fat shame everyone, what the fack? -- only looking back at me to make sure I¡¯m following, smiling before turning forward again, never slowing his shuffle. Okay, is he simple or did I trigger some alarms when he was about to get to third base. This is so awkward. When he steps out of a short raised doorway, and into a wide open courtyard I see that it¡¯s night time, this place is massive, and I¡¯m even more confused. All this space and they¡¯re crawling around through mouse holes? He does a few quick, shallow bows and I look around to figure out where the fookin¡¯ circle is. He wants to know why I¡¯m here, and I¡¯m regretting coming, so how do we get me out. ¡°Come come come,¡± he waves me to follow, heading to another building, and I¡¯m trying to figure out why we¡¯re going back inside. We enter a large, airy hall, with wide open floors, and an occasional brazier, and he points to a small screened off corner. ¡°The transfer circle is beyond those wards.¡± This bish is leading me to a trap. I stare at him blankly. This is some evasive ¡°I never lied¡±, technical bullshit. A long wander to a shielded corner with wards and a transfer circle? I guess if the first one didn¡¯t work they assumed I¡¯d fight my way here, why? I sigh, give a quick nod, then march over to the circle with the monk in tow. If nothing else we¡¯ll end this farce soon. I step on the circle, nothing happens. He starts going through very violent forms, quick jabs, swipes and stabs with lots of squeaking exhales, and then I¡¯m dizzy and standing outside in a very shitty looking village. There are burnt buildings, the air is thick with stink and not-fog, and I¡¯m pretty sure I got dropped in the center of a war. What the fuck? ¡°The fack is going on?¡± I ask Fuck Face after snatching him from my void. ¡°How the fuck would I know?¡± he asks, looking like he lost an argument with a very hands-on wife, holding weeds in one hand and a trowel in the other. Where the fuck did he find weeds? Not in my void. No wait, I¡¯m pretty sure I¡¯ve made a salad with those greens before. ... Why¡¯s he getting rid of my greens? I pick up on chanting and transfer him back to my void. The monks might be able to tell I have a ghost slave, but if they don¡¯t, they don¡¯t have to. I approach a monk quietly murmuring over three people lying down with straw mats masking them from eyebrows to ankles, except for the smaller one. And this isn¡¯t a buff, is it? He¡¯s giving last rites. Got it... ¡°Do you know where I can find Spring Cow?¡± I ask quietly as the monk chants, getting confused looks from some pale crying people nearby. ¡°Spring Cow died trying to purify the village...¡± one of the villagers says, the monk not stopping his chant. ¡°The Ghost Flame Sect came and started killing people. ¡°They¡¯ve desecrated the graves, burnt down our warehouses, and won¡¯t rest until they¡¯ve killed us all,¡± the poor woman says, a slow tear trickling down her cheek. She¡¯s either really shell-shocked or acting her ass off, ¡®cause why come to this place when there¡¯s plenty of bodies, already prepared, in the Graveyards? ¡°Right...¡± I say, nodding along before pointing off to the side. ¡°I¡¯m gonna go over there now...¡± I do exactly that, moving over to some scraggling looking tree, sitting down, and immediately eating some dumplings. I need to make sure I¡¯m topped off before I start cultivating. While I do my preparations I wonder that there¡¯s supposedly a group of ¡°demonic¡± cultivators who specialize in corpse manipulation, with an army of undead, and abilities to utilize the Resentment building up in the area to destroy souls and wreck karma, and the village looks like there was a light protest. Where¡¯s the army? Where¡¯s the corpses? The air is practically smoky with Resentment, and people are... fine? Really? I got fuck-nadoed and it hurt like hell, but these commoners are just... very upset? They took out some monks, -- or got the monks to off themselves, -- and then... stopped? Sounds like they¡¯re targeting monks. And they got rid of Spring Cow. Now I¡¯ll never know if I¡¯m innocent! ¡°Pfft,¡± I sputter, making myself comfortable. I lay down, settle in, and start to nod off. Silent Howl: Ah ah! Would you like to advance Vengeful Ghost Flame Sect Breathing Technique? Yes or no? You¡¯re at twice the necessary requirements to advance it. This bish. I open my eyes to stare off as I rest with my head pillowed on my folded arm. Yes. Silent Howl: So first off, you¡¯re welcome. Second? I don¡¯t know if you realize that you¡¯re collecting Resentment. Like you¡¯re earning some from using the breathing technique, but then you get punished for the max amount of souls you¡¯ve collected. Even when you release them. You ¡°earn¡± 3 and gain hundreds. You¡¯re welcome? I shrug. I don¡¯t know what he wants me to say. Collecting is what I do. Pretty sure I said that already. Hells, other people told me that before I could figure it out. I might not be able to fight, but who has a bank as impressive as mine? Who stores as much essence as I do? I collect. I bank. I make shit. When I get to the ¡°make shit¡± part, it¡¯s gonna be crazy. Silent Howl: You know what? You do you. [Skill Upgraded] [Vengeful Ghost Flame Sect Breathing Technique > Vengeful Ghost Flame Sect Breathing Technique II] Jeebus, that¡¯s a mouthful. If I had my phone that sum bish would probably scroll. Silent Howl: Meditate on Karmic Release? That¡¯s your Last Rites ¡°technique¡±. Yes or no? Where was he when I had all that other shit to upgrade? Or was he still recovering from the big suck? Yes. Silent Howl: Okay, you¡¯re gonna have to meditate on the cycle of Karma until this completes. The more interruptions you have, the longer it¡¯ll take. Try to get somewhere safe, possibly your void, before you start this. I was gonna take a nap and cycle resentment. Guess the purifying part will have to come later. I yawn, snuggle into the ground in my already destroyed robes, and nod off. [Skill Upgraded] [Karmic Release II] Tch! Tell me that skill didn¡¯t stop me from cycling Resentment? [Name: Kisandera, ¡°Sandy¡±, Eclipsed Rainbow] [Affiliation(s): Thousand Valleys, Seven Moons, Companion of the Sacred Phoenix Sovereign, Inner Void Productions, Wimble Sunrise, Scarlet Silk Society, Hunter¡¯s Association, Vengeful Ghost Flame Sect] [Race: Celestial Void Moth Queen[Shattered] (Saint)] ?? [Current Form: Hunan] [Current Realm: Shimmering(Tier 5)] [Current Karma: 97090122/107275977] [Master: Shimmering Steel] [Familiar: Fuck Face (Ghostly Servant)] [Max Will: 9579451] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +506860/-152027] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,272,530] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [HP: 9579451] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,697R,179Da,258De,2605k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10679St] Pffft, that doesn¡¯t tell me shit. I go to my logs to find out the last time I collected Resentment, and it¡¯s not now-ish. So, yes. Upgrading Last Rites paused my collection. -Boo...- I drone, feeling a warmth sizzling along the edges of my brains. -Ew, gross! What?- ... I offended the spirits. They¡¯re doing the brain melting roar of disapproval. I should be grateful that I can help lost spirits return to the natural cycle. Pretty sure you mean I should be happy that I¡¯ve got a better way to collect things, but that¡¯s what practice is for. I¡¯d be mad if I didn¡¯t. I wonder if the health cost is gone? This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it Ooh! I know! I try to think as loudly as possible to drown out the screams in my head. I should try it to see if it worked! Hope any spirits that aren¡¯t willing to move on don¡¯t distract me and get sent the fuck onto their next steps!!! And listen to that roar die down. That¡¯s crazy. Now. I believe I was trying to take a nap! But I kinda wanna know how much my max soul collection thing was... I go into my Logs to see I¡¯ve got a max of 218 souls, so I¡¯m getting residual Resentment. As long as there are no consequences to being the big bank, I¡¯m good. Why doesn¡¯t the positive Resentment Regard thingy work the same? I only get a max of 100 positive soul help. Ooh! The spirits have been donating Karma and Regard to help me send off souls willing to move on. But seriously, 100 good guys or 500 bad guys, and fack me if I catch 500 assholes? Like fack my soul forever? How do I spend this shiz? [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +506960/-152248] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,272,554] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,090,217/107,275,977] So what changed? I still have to pay health. Wait. It¡¯s showing my max baddie body count. Wait. Does Last Rites show me my negative Karma count for souls? I. Suppose... That¡¯s helpful. Fucking assholes... No one warned me about any of this shit! I flop onto my back to stare up at the sky through the scraggly canopy. -Worst. Tutorial. Ever.- I sigh before tensing. -Am I supposed to raise my rank to learn? Dude was going to kill me if I didn¡¯t Get Gud. Did I not Get Gud yet?- I need to kick some ass. So first hurdle was 10 spirits to start cultivating? I got skills by beating corpses. There¡¯s an army of undead? And a group of corpse manipulators? Maybe this is a thing the disciples are doing in order to prove their ability. The village is unimportant. The Resentment is unimportant. They¡¯re showing off their ability to maintain their armies. And I need to gather Resentment and kick some ass. -Okay, me. Prepare to get fuck-nadoed,- I sigh as I get up and head towards the loudest screams. There¡¯s a group of monks in a mini gazebo, possibly an appropriated small altar, a tiny roofed in enclosure with no walls, bunched together, and chanting. One dude¡¯s tapping out a steady rhythm on a drum, a few are holding balls hanging on chains billowing smoke, and they¡¯ve all got their heads bowed, one hand raised in blade form. ¡®Cause cool guys don¡¯t look at the armies of corpses standing before them with hidden generals staring them down while wishing awful things upon them. Holy shiz, no wonder there¡¯s so much Resentment! I sit down with the people praying with the monks to start my own meditations. All your Resentment are belong to me, bishes. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +507060/-152469] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,272,578] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,090,312/107,275,977] And your spirits! Suck it! [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +510660/-160425] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,433][Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,093,732/107,275,977] I want to check on my progress, -- don¡¯t want to be down for days, -- and stretch while opening my Logs. Only to immediately close my logs to look at the motherfucker patting my hip in time to the monk drum. I stare at the monk resting his hand on my head and patting my hip while quietly chanting, wondering why my head is resting on his legs and where the fuck everyone else went. The altar space is empty except for a monk keeping rhythm and singing softly while staring with dead eyes at the army of corpses. ¡°The fuck are you doing?¡± I ask the monk, looking from his face to his wayward hand, and he has the decency to look embarrassed. ¡°One of the elders noticed you were Purifying the area as long as you dreamt, so we tried to make you comfortable. We tried rubbing your back and arms but you¡¯d swing if anyone was too close to your neck. Eventually your nightmare passed and we were able to comfort you while you cleaned the village,¡± he nods, scooting backwards before bowing with his hands resting on his legs. ¡°We¡¯ve been doing our best, but the toll for defying evil is always high. We thank you for your assistance.¡± ¡°Right,¡± I look towards the army to see that they¡¯re no longer toeing the lights coming from the altar. ¡°You were able to release the spirits bound to corpse flesh. The demonic cultists moved back, but haven¡¯t left yet,¡± the monk continues, the guy drumming still chanting and keeping time. I open my mouth, -- even though I don¡¯t need to to speak. Method actor, -- and there¡¯s loud screams and crashing in the distance. I look towards the armies to see they¡¯re still standing, but notice movement at the edge of my vision. They¡¯d moved some of the corpses around to attack the village from a different angle. I thought they weren¡¯t here to fight? I leap to my feet and race after the monk not keeping cadence, the others scrabbling back to the altar and leaving the villagers to defend themselves. Literally. The monks. Have left the fighting. To commoners with pitchforks. How are all these people not dead? Three. There are only three corpses attacking the town. And they¡¯re making a show of it. Literally wading forward with the ¡°this is my bubble¡± personal space arm swings, pivoting their hips to walk. They¡¯re trying so hard not to fight that I swear the corpses are fighting laughter. And the villagers really think they¡¯re doing something? Seeing how the villagers are loudly screaming, and idly getting swept aside, but not absolutely destroyed, how am I supposed to take this serious? I sit down, lie down, make myself comfy, --. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +510960/-161088] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,504] [Current Qi: 1,905,520/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,094,017/107,275,977] -- and I¡¯m shaken awake by the monk who ran towards the ¡°fighting¡±. ¡°The corpses have fallen. The village thanks you,¡± he says earnestly, hand still on my shoulder. He gives my shoulder a squeeze then offers his other hand to help me up. How secluded are they? Girl-shoulder? Mmm. And he got to touch my silk. ? Ooh~! ? He¡¯s gonna have to decontaminate. Scales go shimmer shimmer. The monk guides me back to the town center where the villagers are attempting to figure out how to defend the village long enough for the monks to purify the undead. Seriously? They think they¡¯re gonna do what? Hold off the army being drip-fed to them when they¡¯re losing people to zombies on a playdate? I know I¡¯ve got mad stink face right now, but when I look around at the crowd there¡¯s someone, pale skin and hair, a white sheath dress, her swept up bun tied with a series of pearl ribbons, mirroring my expression at me. I narrow my eyes at her, going to my Logs to learn that someone, probably other stink face, thinks all of us peasants are filthy and gross, and maybe the zombies are just other villagers with brain fever. How is no one commenting on how this bish isn¡¯t trying to fight or pray? Her dress is spotless. ¡°We need a way to alert everyone to an attack and a way to tell them which direction to go. Preferably before the corpse armies destroy more of the town,¡± one man bearing a large spear says. Pretty sure everyone here is supposed to be a commoner, at least they fight like commoners. ... Is this a re-enactment? -Oh~!- That makes so much more sense. I realize I¡¯m nodding to myself, but the others are nodding, too, so I don¡¯t look too suspicious. ¡°Perhaps we can negotiate? Give them a token sacrifice, and hope they leave us alone?¡± Ms. Dinner Party says, turning to slowly look at me. Shivering Moon¡¯s Reflection. I narrow my eyes as I close my Logs. ¡°Are you volunteering?¡± I ask, making a point to throw her on the fire first. She¡¯s willing to suggest it, but is she willing to stand by her ideals? ¡°Oh, I couldn¡¯t,¡± she smiles reaching out to pat the air in my direction. ¡°I¡¯ve far too much to do elsewhere.¡± ¡°Are you saying that you want to sacrifice the villagers to buy yourself time to escape? To go deal with your personal business?¡± I ask and this bish beams brightly at me while the clearly not villagers are frowning as they look between the two of us. Yeah, these bishes are LARPing. No way they¡¯d be this cool with some outsider saying they should lay down and die so she can go on her way. Did the villagers do something? Is this their fault? This is a reenactment, right? Spoiled VI Chapter Three ¡°Apologies, but we should sacrifice the weakest so that the rest of us can escape, and, no offense,¡± she says turning to me, and I know I¡¯m about to be offended. ¡°You don¡¯t look healthy enough to keep up. All that extra weight. You understand.¡± She attempts to look concerned, but she¡¯s sarcastically pouting too hard. Pretty sure she¡¯s trying to hide her smirk, and the fact that this is her go to...? ¡°My tits won¡¯t slow me down if I¡¯m going to move, and what makes you think you¡¯re pampered ass can keep up? Are you a cultivator?¡± I lean forward, all excited suspense and watch as her expression drops into a glare. ¡°Don¡¯t want to frown. Wrinkles.¡± ¡°And this is why women aren¡¯t at the town meetings,¡± the spearman shakes his head, and I can¡¯t even be mad. Village might fall, but I¡¯m pretty sure I¡¯m about to snatch blondie to find out if her roots match. That hair style is probably to save on dye. ¡°We need a system. Lookouts. Scouts. Message runners,¡± the spearman who definitely is shit at pretending to be common, says, speaking forcefully with unfocused eyes. He¡¯s picturing this shit out without looking at what they have, because LARPing? ¡°A bell with a system of rings to indicate direction and a frantic ring for when we¡¯re under attack,¡± I offer, raising my hand and lowering it when he looks at me. ¡°Is there a watchtower or does one have to be built?¡± ¡°Will this work?¡± someone asks, dusting off a hand bell. When he rings it it¡¯s very clear and sharp. These bishes are playing war games. Why would commoners have well crafted bells? Like not even cheap, dinky cowbells, but some well crafted, probably walnut or something handle, bell. It¡¯s not even rusted or patchy or cloudy. Shit is pristine. So we¡¯re playing like that huh? I stand up, holding my hand out for the bell. [Piercing Shot Successful] [-30 Qi] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +510960/-161088] [Max Will: 9579451] [HP: 9579451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24273503][Current Qi: 1905490/957945100] I shoot a thread through the tip of the bell handle, blocking the other end with my hand, I snap the thread to make a little tie around a rough silk belt I produce, tying the belt around my waist with the bell tied behind me. ¡°You tied it on backwards,¡± Shivering Moon says, mouth twisted, her face screwed up in a smug smirk. ¡°This means we¡¯re under attack,¡± I say, arms up, twerking fast and hard, the bell sounding loudly, drowning out her indignant scream quite nicely. I lean forward hands on my knees and bounce the bell off one cheek. ¡°That¡¯s one direction.¡± From one cheek to the other. ¡°This means a different direction.¡± I stop then bounce the bell from one cheek to the other once, repeating it again so they note the change. ¡°Different direction.¡± Left, right, center bounce, rapid shake. ¡°Different direction. Now then,¡± I pause making sure they¡¯re all watching, some with more interest than amusement, and run down the list again. ¡°We just have to pick the direction. Unless someone has a better idea?¡± ¡°Hold it in your hand,¡± the woman snaps, all red cheeks, and pale sweaty forehead. ¡°Let¡¯s test that,¡± I suggest before someone else hands her a bell. They¡¯ve got more? ¡°Shall we pick a scenario and test those arms of yours?¡± ¡°I --!¡± she stops. Did she literally just realize I volunteered her, the others were okay with it, and she accepted? Oops? ¡°Let¡¯s keep it simple. Alarm is urgent, even and slow is North, one is East, two is South, three is West. Agreed?¡± Spearman looks around, most people agreeing while a monk frowns as he scans the faces of those present. The monks are actually trying to purify the town, and that costs a lot for them. It¡¯s why they were pooling their resources. Why the fuck are the monks here? Or are they not in on it? ¡°Come on then, noodle arms,¡± I point out, distracted from the monk with another look at prissy stink face, bending my knees as I swing my hips, swinging the bell around in circles behind me. ¡°Alright! First test! Attack from the north!¡± Spearman shouts raising his spear. Does it have a pick on the back end? I stare at the weird tool while rapidly shimmying for a 3 count, swirl to make it ring once, then shaking it again. I manage to keep my rhythm while trying to figure out why the dude has a pick with a shaft his height. ¡°Attack! West!¡± Spearman shouts, raising his spear again. Shimmy. Bounce bounce bounce. Shimmy. Bounce bounce bounce. Spearman calls out a few more, -- ¡®cause we have time for this, -- and I¡¯m just grooving. Dinner Party only lasted three alarms before she dropped out, -- said her hand was cramping. Bet if she was shaking off a rich lord that hand wouldn¡¯t bother her. Different motions, I suppose... -- and I¡¯m the official bell ringer. Not the lookout. They might be playing pretend, but at least they know I don¡¯t have that kind of attention span. If I could move without changing my breathing, I could meditate. Stock up on some Resentment. I snort, rolling my eyes as a watchtower, made from tree trunks, appears out of nowhere. I¡¯m getting pissed off for the monks. A lot of them are dropping trying to purify the place. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +511160/-161530] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,550] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,094,202/107,275,977] I¡¯m vibing while just swinging the bell in circles in the tower when I hear a commotion below me. The lookout doesn¡¯t tell me to sound the alarm, looking over the edge as someone shouts for our attention. ¡°What¡¯s the retreat sound?¡± the lookout asks and I just bounce out left right with no breaks. ¡°That¡¯s the retreat sound,¡± he shouts down before turning back to me. ¡°They got it, thanks.¡± ¡°Who¡¯s going to signal you to signal the retreat?¡± I ask. I¡¯m betting Dinner Party is behind this bullshit. ¡°Good point,¡± he says before leaning over and shouting down. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +511360/-161972] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,598] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,094,392/107,275,977] ¡°Attack, East,¡± the lookout says, tapping me on the shoulder. Shimmy. Bounce. Shimmy. Shimmy. Bounce. Shimmy. I repeat the pattern, hopping to move around the watchtower in an effort to catch what the lookout saw. I probably should have figured out the directions, and the roof, -- these fuckers had time to put a roof on the tower, -- blocks out the sky. I doubt I even actually know directions, so this is a good indicator of where to start. ¡°I¡¯m here to take over your shift,¡± Dinner Party says, climbing up the ladder and dusting her hands off. She turns to me, palm out, and waits. ¡°Ooh, a break? Can¡¯t imagine you lasting longer than a quick snack,¡± I shrug, handing over the bell after getting rid of all of my silk. Want a belt? Get your own, ya snarky bish! The glare keeps me warm as the lookout tries not to laugh. I bounce my ass through the town, -- the rhythm¡¯s in my soul! -- nodding at people who bow to me as I go. Guess I¡¯m winning the fake fight? ¡°It¡¯s called shapely,¡± one man says as I pass, curving his hands through the air to outline my figure. ¡°I like my women people sized. You¡¯re not getting turned on by the woman, you just want to bed your mattress,¡± one man scoffs, shuddering as he turns away. Bish. I look for a spot to bed down so I can purify the area again and notice that there¡¯s a cool breeze and blue LEDs coming from the Altar area. There¡¯s a ton of smoke rising to the sky, and the alarms aren¡¯t being sounded. -Oh, fuck off,- I say, racing to help the monks. There¡¯s literally a blue Ghost Flame being held back at the edge of the altar, someone in dark robes grinning distractedly as they watch the flame slowly ease towards the monks who are chanting in an effort to hold it back. Assholes! [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version. [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +511460/-162193] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,621] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,094,487/107,275,977] Too slow! The flames shrink, the other disciple frowns, but they¡¯re still there. I storm over, trying to center myself, and say fack it. I collect Resentment, do I? I try to collect and bank the flames the way I¡¯d collect and bank essence, the flames going out, and my fingers tingle. Okay, at least I have a target. I charge at the disciple who looks at me with wet eyes, looking hurt and shocked as he backpedals. Not concerned, not afraid, just like I told him he can¡¯t have dessert because he didn¡¯t eat his veggies. He turns around, darting between corpses and I glare after him. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +511560/-162850] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,645] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,094,582/107,275,977] The monks behind me take a collective breath before two bastards scare the shit outta me by leaping to either side of me while spinning incense burners. The smoke pushes the corpses back a step, which is interesting. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +512560/-163071] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,894] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,095,577/107,275,977] -Oh, shit! Really?- I look back at the monks to see they¡¯re all looking straight ahead, chanting like we¡¯re about to stomp the yard. What got into them? -Let¡¯s go!- [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +513560/-163292] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,577,985] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,274,143] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,096,572/107,275,977] -Let¡¯s fuck ¡®em up!- I cheer, my incense honor guard taking a quick shuffle step forward for every step I take, looking like they¡¯re going to dome someone while swinging their soul lassos. The corpses fall, I bank them, then notice Fashionista glaring at me from in front of the next line. -Oh, shit!- He reaches one hand up, and one hand down, I clench and bite down on telling the monks to run, -- I think I need their incense if I want to not take that hit, and I doubt they can get away in time, -- and then he quickly swaps hands, the down up and the up down, the world going blue as I reach out and try to collect his bullshit. And we¡¯re fine...? ¡°Whoo!¡± I shout, pelvic thrusting in victory. Logs say...! Chains of Heavens and Hells for 100 -Resentment! ¡°We got this!¡± I shout back at the monks, turning back to Fashionista. ¡°I owe you, don¡¯t I?¡± ¡°Tch,¡± Fashionista rolls his eyes and disappears, all that¡¯s left is a crumbling tower of stones, his marker as the stones roll away. ¡°Ah! Bish! Tch!¡± I shake my head before turning back to the army ahead of us as the monks keep swinging their incense. ¡°You guys okay?¡± ¡°We¡¯re doing better as long as we stay inside the smoke from the incense,¡± one of my honor guard says, face still set in a stony glare. He could probably order his favorite meal and keep that same expression. ¡°You guys mind staying here? I¡¯ve got some unfinished business to attend to,¡± I say while narrowing my eyes at the marker. I¡¯m part of the same sect, and it works like a transfer circle, so I should have access through my void ability or ghost ability, right? ¡°Go back to the village or leave. Things here aren¡¯t very simple. I¡¯m not sure why you¡¯re being sacrificed or how they convinced you to give your lives, but those commoners in the village aren¡¯t common.¡± ¡°We¡¯ll regroup and try to leave,¡± one of the monks nods. ¡°We¡¯ve noticed that we¡¯ve lost more priests than villagers, and the villagers that fell looked like thralls, not peasants. Thank you for helping us,¡± stony glare says, eyebrows still knit in rage as he pours his heart out to me before giving a quick nod. He turns away, both monks going back to back to stay in the incense and somehow not crossing chains. - ? Hope this works ? ,- I bounce on my heals before reaching out to the fallen marker. I try to sense something, anything, and feel it as I get tackled by a corpse soldier. -Bish!- [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +512560/-163071] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,894] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,095,577/107,275,977] -You wanted this smoke!- I cackle as the soldier disappears. -Ooh! That smoke goes pretty far. Nice!- I bank the other fallen, turn back to the marker, and try to store Resentment into it. -Please work so I don¡¯t look like an idiot...- Ghost Road Achievement +100 I¡¯m treated to a map, a list of dots scattered in an uneasy void. So markers are paths through one of the hells? Or... What¡¯s going on? Am I just feeling the Resentment used to make them? Some of the markers pulse slightly, just brighten and dim, a path that leads somewhere, and I wonder if this is the path to the Sect or the Graveyards or if the spirits are trying to tell me something. I shrug, risk it for the biscuit, and get pulled through darkness and flame. [Used Stone Marker] [-10 -Resentment] [-50 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +513560/-163382] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,894] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,095,577/107,275,977] And I¡¯m standing in a hollow in the middle of tall grass with a stone marker a short distance away. -Wait, so how much does it cost to take other people through? Is it like when I transfer --. Nevermind.- If it only costs 10 no matter group size, those transporters are making a mint! [Used Stone Marker] [-10 -Resentment] [-50 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +513560/-163382] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,894] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,095,577/107,275,977] Six more jumps and I¡¯m in what looks like a food court with stone benches, park style seating. I look around and see Fashionista with a sour expression drinking tea at a table with several other people before someone walks into me. ¡°If you¡¯re new, don¡¯t stand in the same spot as your Void Walk!¡± an older man who looks like a lecturer with his strange tall boxy hat, and brightly colored blue on black trimmed long robes with his tangerine colored loose robe pants wags his finger at me, shaking his head as he walks around me and towards the closest stall with its hot pans. I walk forward slowly while looking around, trying to get a feel for where I am. There¡¯s the weird pocked black rock everywhere, but this place is brightly lit and clean. And people are wearing good clothes. I duck into my void, washing up and changing quickly, snacking on dumplings and stuffed buns while I do, -- don¡¯t want to get distracted while stomping someone¡¯s ass. Probably should have gotten some of that incense from the monks before I left, -- and then I walk back into the food court to see Fashionista sitting and glaring at me while the people with him are standing around. I walk up to Fashionista, don¡¯t sit down, -- because I¡¯m not that big of a dumbass, -- and look for any signs of nervousness. He ¡°hmphs¡± with a small smile, the cup still raised to mouth height although he doesn¡¯t drink from it, and turns to look forward. Oh, so he¡¯s removing me from his sight, hmm? ¡°It would appear that the Catastrophe of the Rising Sun Empire is only so so,¡± he says, eyebrow quirking. One, how¡¯d he know who I was? And Two, bish says what? ¡°I¡¯m a silk producer,¡± I remind him. ¡°I collect trash and produce silk. If you can¡¯t withstand me I¡¯d love to see how you fare against an actual tailor! Those spider Monarchs are dangerous customers,¡± I scoff. He shatters the cup in his hand, looking at the light mess he made before pulling out a handkerchief. ¡°I¡¯m not even a fighter. And you attacked me. I suppose the cultivators in the demonic sects of the Golden Sun Empire are only so so.¡± Bish. Say something. I fookin¡¯ dare you! ¡°And you ran from me, didn¡¯t you?¡± I say slowly before looking at him with my brows knit. ¡°I had to follow you here. I had to figure out how to use your techniques to track you so that I could find out why you keep attacking me. Once in the Graveyards, again in a village. Are you trying to get devoured?¡± He stiffens, sitting just a little straighter and the people talking behind him are suddenly whispering behind their hands and moving away. Say something! ¡°Now, I may not be much of a fighter, but I am very good at storing. I¡¯m going to go back and cultivate more Resentment. I¡¯m sure I¡¯ll find a use for it,¡± I bow to him, turning away before turning back. ¡°Although I should thank you for your contribution of ghost soldiers. They have been very enlightening. And tasty! Cured meat, you know,¡± I nod my head, wagging a finger with my other arm behind me in a calmer, friendlier version of the bullshit the elder pulled on me. I walk back to the marker, Silent Howl reassuring me that the known points on the Ghost Road are stored away in my Library, and then I head back to LARP village. I¡¯m supposed to farm Resentment? I can farm Resentment. Let¡¯s see what else I learn. All these people wanting me to Get Gud? See if I don¡¯t! Spoiled VI Chapter Four Not sure I like the Ghost Road. It¡¯s a way to spend -Resentment, sure, but I don¡¯t know how to move from one point to the other without having to go to all the points in between. I¡¯m pretty sure I¡¯m looking at it wrong, but meh. I bank Fashionista¡¯s marker, the structure rebuilt, and then go to my void to make sure I banked it, not set it. Transfer back out to the village, and head over to my purification posse to find up what¡¯s up. ¡°Why didn¡¯t the alarm sound?¡± I ask, then remember I had an excuse to kick Dinner Party¡¯s ass. ¡°I¡¯m gonna go find out,¡± I tell them. They¡¯re looking rough, but there¡¯s no Ghost Flame, so winning? I get a nod in passing and jog to the village square looking for Big Pick. I see, him frowning, arms crossed, Dinner Party smirking, arms crossed, and some rando towering over both of them, frowning lightly, arms crossed. ¡°You abandoned your post,¡± Big Pick says, moving in on me. ¡°Excuse the fuck outta you,¡± I feel my head tilting to the side and everything feels slightly murderable all of a sudden. ¡°Dinner Party came and said she was giving me a break. I¡¯ve got a witness! Ask the lookout!¡± ¡°I was the lookout,¡± says the tower with hair who is most definitely not my skittish tweaker bald lookout. ¡°Oh, really. You were the lookout in the tower with me?¡± Are they for real? There were people there! ¡°I was,¡± he says without a moments hesitation. He¡¯s walking into this one with confidence. ¡°Who asked what the retreat signal was?¡± I ask. I didn¡¯t pay attention, but I bet it was Dinner Party. ¡°I did,¡± he says without hesitation, -- color me surprised, -- and Dinner Party scowls. ¡°So you¡¯re saying you were below the tower asking the lookout to ask me what the retreat sound was, and you were the little lookout who I was talking with?¡± I ask him. Where¡¯d she get this guy? ¡°I --,¡± he pauses, registering that he was in fact not in the tower and there were other people present when he¡¯d asked. I turn my head to Big Pick who frowns and registers that this motherfucker was in fact not in the tower with me when this happened. ¡°She came up to the tower, which didn¡¯t make sense, and said she was there to take over my shift. I knew she meant break, ¡®cause she can¡¯t handle a full shift, and then she held her hand out. I took the silk off my bell and gave it to her,¡± I explain, Dinner Party glaring at me like I¡¯m just gonna let her slide after trying to out me all night. ¡°She found a bell in the fields... Your silk was missing,¡± Big Pick turns to the two false witnesses before sighing heavily. ¡°The monks were attacked the second she took over and she didn¡¯t sound the alarm!¡± I shout, remembering the main reason I was going to kick her ass. ¡°I had to go over and help them. Where were you?¡± I ask her and she finally stops looking smug and annoyed enough to look around nervously. ¡°I --,¡± she starts, uncrossing her arms but not lowering her hands. ¡°-- about to get your ass kicked!¡± I tell her, pointing at her as I close in. Considering how badly she¡¯s fucking this up, I¡¯m gonna be pissed if she can fight. ¡°Burning Vengeance!¡± she shouts, pulling out a script paper which burns into a ball of Ghost Flame as she hurls it at me. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +512560/-163071] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,273,894] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,095,577/107,275,977] I don¡¯t even have to try that hard. Wait. Shit. Did more monks die or are there ghost soldiers in town? This bish... ¡°I¡¯m going to kill you now,¡± I say, way past my limit and Big Pick raises his fucking hand to block me as Dinner Party and Big Tower run in two different directions. ¡°And what makes you think you¡¯re safe?¡± I ask, amazed at the sheer stones it takes for him to decide he has any control over what I do or don¡¯t eat. ¡°They¡¯re gone now,¡± he says gently, quietly. ¡°Yeah, to try again later!¡± I snap. Who the fuck falls for this bullshit? They knew what they were doing. They know what side they¡¯re on. It¡¯s not like they got tricked into doing something with no idea what the consequences are. To be fair they probably didn¡¯t know I was one of the consequences, but I¡¯m pretty sure with zombies involved being eaten was on the list! ¡°We¡¯ve seen them,¡± a monk says from behind me. Yay, they¡¯re not all dead! ¡°We¡¯ll get them if they try anything,¡± he says sternly. Oh, gods, they make stern monk in multiple sizes. My size stern monk! ¡°If you could come with me, we could do with your assistance,¡± Medium Stern Monk says, taking a step back and bowing to me. Aw... ¡°Let¡¯s kick some ass,¡± I say making sure to stare blankly at Big Pick before smiling at the monk. ¡°Lead the way.¡± Apparently with me there they can focus on diffusing the incense smoke versus purifying the area, which helps me out, and somehow heals them. It¡¯s odd that someone got the monks there, probably by just pointing out that there were shenanigans going on, but why is there a cosplay convention for people who don¡¯t know what a simple life is enough to pretend to live one? What bothers me is that, despite the fact that this is great for my cultivation, there are several people who step up with their armies, try to Ghost Flame me when their soldiers fall, then peace out. Like, I can see the monks aren¡¯t too happy, and I still don¡¯t know what to do with the -Resentment other than finding a safe spot to burn it with a shit to of Ghost Flame, but what the fuck? Like they honestly try to bury us under bodies that fall to the incense and a deep breath, and then they show their faces to try to attack me, shrug and walk off. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +516660/-164136] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,576,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1,831,238/24,274,738] [Current Qi: 1,905,490/957,945,100] [Current Karma: 97,098,952/107,275,977] ¡°Is there a way for me to get some of that incense?¡± I ask during a lull as the mini armies shift around. The author''s tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. ¡°If we survive all of this, come by the monastery,¡± one of the monks says, face transformed from a stern frown to a tired grin. ¡°If not? It¡¯s just funereal incense. You can buy some at any monastery.¡± ¡°There a way for me to pay with it with work? Reputation?¡± I ask. I¡¯m trying to get more stuff for the stuff I have. ¡°Donations?¡± ¡°We¡¯ll see what we can do,¡± one monk sighs, slowly lying back from the relaxing pile. ¡°Hold on,¡± one monk says, high stepping while showing off the hand bell he¡¯s gotten from somewhere. ¡°Ready?¡± We all watch as he stands, taking a meditative stance and chanting quietly. I shrug as I look around, the monks around me looking stern or fighting smiles, and then he rings the bell. It feels like someone¡¯s trying to make a big silk withdrawal and I think I have a heart attack. For all the advances I made, for the triplets or Shimmering Steel to sneak up on me and stealth drain me? They¡¯ll kill me and then keep me in a recovery coma. I don¡¯t know if there¡¯s anyone like Modesty who eventually feels bad enough to try to help me. So many years... ¡°No, they¡¯re still alive,¡± someone murmurs. I blink and look up into someone checking my pupils. Wonder how well that works. I simulate a lot of weird hunan responses that don¡¯t affect my actual health. Am I capable of having a heart attack? Or is there a bug equivalent? I turn my head, coughing into my hand as I go to my Logs to find out what the fack. I¡¯ve lost Resentment. Aw... How much? I see names, not numbers. What? I¡¯ve lost Resentment towards --. -If I wanted enlightenment, I¡¯d go take a nap!- Holy shiz nuggets, that scared the shit outta me. Had a whole ass existential crisis for no reason. My heart... Ss. Hearts. I can¡¯t breathe. ¡°I¡¯m so tired...¡± I bring up my knees, resting my arms on them and my head on my arms as I take a shaky breath. ¡°Well, it works better on corpses,¡± the monk doing a quick health check rubs my back while pointing out at the trampled farmland with the corpse soldiers. Who are milling about mindlessly. It¡¯s concerning how satisfying it is to see corpse manipulators throwing tantrums and getting bulldozed by their shambling horde. I watch as the monks take turns meditating and ringing the bell before the corpse manipulators finally fack off. ¡°So we won?¡± I ask as the ¡°attackers¡± retreat, leaving behind a scattering of stone markers. ¡°We still have to purify the village and find out what happened here,¡± one of the resting monks says, lying on his back, ankles crossed, one arm over his eyes. ¡°Will the bell help with that?¡± I ask, looking around to see the morale drop. ¡°Only works on purifying internal Resentment,¡± one monk sighs, his limbs flopping out as his head falls to the side. ¡°So the village still needs to be cleared,¡± I say, yawning. ¡°I¡¯m gonna go eat something. Then I¡¯m going to bed. I need a nap.¡± I stagger to my feet, the monks on duty having to get back up to replace me, and this is some bullshit. They can¡¯t leave. If they do the Resentment will fester into something that¡¯s probably awful, but it¡¯s just a handful of them against what looks like a whole class of roleplaying disciples. The fact that some of the people might actually be villagers is just sad. I post up under scraggle tree, setting up a table and giving myself a simple, fresh meal just in case I really have been eating corpse dumplings. Monks are vegetarians, right? Not vegans? Or is it like a personal preference. I¡¯m eating and minding my own business when I hear someone shrieking. I keep eating, trying to figure out why Dinner Party is standing around looking like she rolled through the gutter, pointing at me and screaming. Did they catch her and she¡¯s trying to shift the blame to me? Pffft, again? I check my logs and she¡¯s screaming about the foods she recognizes. It started with the fact that she¡¯d only had a bite of a shared baked potato, -- apparently food wasn¡¯t provided so people are making do with this weird exercise, -- then she was offended that I was hoarding food, -- my food that I produced, so eat me, not literally. Fuck around and get et if you want to, -- and then she recognized some of my fresher greens as incredibly toxic. And tried to tell me to spit them out. She thinks I¡¯m desperate enough to cook poison and hope I¡¯ll be okay. I flutter my mouth bits at her and she shuts up. No way in hell that she¡¯s pretending she doesn¡¯t know who and what I --. Oh... Oh, really. I read as a few people who just thought I was odd and not fit to wander around without an escort, -- nanny or babysitter if I¡¯m understanding the ideas right. It¡¯s so hard to extract intention from text without just going to the deeper mind reading parts. -- suddenly realize that I¡¯m not hunan. The monks know, and the disciples should know. So... [-100 HP] [30 -Resentment] [-50 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +521660/-165271] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24275969] [Current Qi: 1905490/957945100] [Current Karma: 97103877/107275977] No warning. He didn¡¯t even have to think about it. He¡¯s behind me, so there¡¯s no way he saw the mouth thing. What else did I do? I¡¯m eating and Big Pick just throws his spear at me. It punches right through me, and I have no indication in my Logs that he has any aggression towards me. His thoughts are literally, ¡®kill non-hunans¡¯. [-100 HP] [30 -Resentment] [-50 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +100/-0] [Resentment: +521660/-165301] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,384] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24275956] [Current Qi: 1905490/957945100] [Current Karma: 97103827/107275977] I tumble into my void wondering why it¡¯s so hard to breathe. I don¡¯t have lungs. What the fack. Am I in shock? ¡°Get rid of it,¡± I tell Fuck Face as he runs up and grabs the spear before letting go quickly. I¡¯m wheezing, going back over the is it a living hunan checklist fuck face, -- Big Pick not Fuck Face, -- sets for himself when picking targets. Is it alive? No? Kill it. Yes? Is it hunan? No. Kill it. Yes? Move on. Da fuq? My focus narrows as Fuck Face grabs the spear and drags it sideways to get it further away from the center of my body. Is he gonna pull it out through my ribs?! Why doesn¡¯t he pull it out from my back?! I gasp, heaving in deep breaths. Okay, that¡¯s one problem fixed. Before I can tell him to pull the spear out he starts pushing it in deeper. I watch as the spear head gets further and further away from me. He¡¯s trying to kill me! ¡°Stop! Just pull it out!¡± I shriek. ¡°No. This way is better. The head is too broad, and you keep trying to heal around it,¡± he says calmly as he adjusts his grip. ¡°Have you seen the other end?¡± I snap, wondering if he bothered to check the butt of the ¡°spear¡±. ... ¡°Oh.¡± He¡¯s honestly trying to kill me. I rear back, arms shifting, -- ? hello, kill scythes, my old friends... ? How the fuck did I forget I can do this? -- and I slice through the spear coming out the front, hooking and flinging the part behind me away. I fall forward, scythes barely piercing the soil before my movement is arrested, and evict Fuck Face for being a fuck face. I coil and writhe before crawling away. I need a hug. I curl up, and someone strokes my hair. I wake up with my head on Aunty¡¯s lap as she keeps stroking my hair. ¡°Ay-yah, those Resentment tools are nasty business,¡± she sighs. The what now? I go to my Logs to find out what she¡¯s talking about, and stare in outrage, growing more and more offended the longer I read that the bullshit continued. I got poisoned. Me. I¡¯m going to kill him. Mr. Be Reasonable fucking poisoned me? I got your ass. I think I¡¯m going to boil blondie and make him watch. Gained 30 Resentment a tick, but I¡¯m not sure what the threshold for bad shit happening is. Lost 50 Karma each tick? Fuck you, very much. And it hit me 10 times... Just from sitting in me? Why 10? Is that my pulse rate? A spell? Oh, it¡¯s an enchantment. Okay, that¡¯s one mystery solved. ¡°What the fuck did I do that Fuck Face tried to kill me?¡± I whine. He¡¯d grabbed it then let go, hadn¡¯t he. I thought he was afraid of hurting me. Nah, he shoved that fucker sideways. He literally could have just pulled it out. He left that shit in on purpose. No way he thought the Karma hits were better than him just yanking the spear out. ¡°The spearhead is too broad, my ass!¡± I snap. ¡°The monks are calling you,¡± Aunty says, gently patting my shoulder. ¡°Go.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll go, and I¡¯m gonna fuck up anyone who pulls a stupid rock metal weapon on me!¡± I shout, waking up and limp back into the village. Probably should have said raw metal or shaped ore instead of rock metal... Tch. ¡°You¡¯re back! You¡¯re alive!¡± a giant of a monk says and I limp towards them. He bends down, picking me up, and I wonder how bad I look. ¡°Don¡¯t worry. We¡¯re shielded from your scales for the most part.¡± Excuse me? ¡°I¡¯ll carry you to the front lines. You just purify, we¡¯ll handle the rest!¡± Considering the whole job is purifying, that¡¯s not very reassuring, asshole. I thought these were the good guys. I¡¯m combing my silk, grooming, before I realize that I¡¯ve got human parts and bug parts. I¡¯m some awful human bug centaur. He¡¯s got my abdomen tucked under his arms, my segmented human-ish legs, -- just the two for full nightmare fuel, -- tucked against the bulk of my body. I¡¯ve got my sickle arms, but they¡¯ve got an opposable grasper, -- I¡¯m a bug with thumbs... -- at the base of the scythe, because I are bat bug? I shrug and keep grooming before I realize I¡¯m eyeing the monk¡¯s cueball like a giant chocolate candy. -I¡¯m gonna start eating soon, and I don¡¯t want to get shot again!- I snap, the monk guffawing. ¡°We¡¯ve managed to gather a few more poison weeds to prevent any of the more desperate ones from trying to do what you did,¡± the monk sighs, taking a breath and slipping his stern face on. ¡°We lost a few more people who tried to sneak your meal after you left, so we had to recover that as well. We hope you can perform Last Rites for them as well.¡± -More bodies, more Resentments, and more spirits. Got it.- Spoiled VI Chapter Five
[Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +526660/-166676] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,576,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277088] [Current Qi: 1905490/957945100] [Current Karma: 97108352/107275977] He wasn¡¯t lying. I¡¯m literally being carried along, surrounded by a phalanx of chanting monks, swinging incense and carrying small braziers barehanded, -- Like absolute bosses. Dude there¡¯s only a handful of monks left. My Sect mates are dicks. How are they generating this much Resentment? And why? -- eating and vibing. They really did gather up my dishes and shit. I finish one bowl? They hand me another. I run out of food in my last bowl? Fresh, monk-picked toxic greens. It kinda looks like someone tried to prepare some of them for cooking before giving up. Some smart ass found a pot they attached to a long pole of some sort, making a makeshift gong that they sound with their Qi right next to me. I scream, rear up and gong right the fuck back at them. [New Skill Learned] [Death Knell Successful] [-1 Condensed Qi] [10 Karma] [-30 -Resentment] [30 +Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [Resentment: +526690/-166646] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277090] [Current Qi: 1905491/957945100] [Current Karma: 97108352/107275977] Assholes. The fuck are they cheering for? I go to my Logs to find out this was a setup. The bastards have been trying to coax me into making funeral bells for a while. That¡¯s why the hand bell. That¡¯s why the gong. They hoped I¡¯d pick up on the metronome drum bullshit, but I hadn¡¯t, so they got creative. Wait, what did I just do? Um... Spend -Resentment, gain +Resentment --. No health loss? Already better. Tch! A meagre karma gain... Guess it had to get balanced out somewhere. Aw, tits. The bell purified the negative resentment, so I can¡¯t just suck that up after doing the bell thing. Tch! No double dipping? Boo... If I knew what this stuff was for I¡¯d probably care more and know which one to grab. Pretty sure accruing negative resentment is bad though, so... [Death Knell Successful] [-1 Condensed Qi] [10 Karma] [-30 -Resentment] [30 +Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [Resentment: +526720/-166616] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277093] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97108372/107275977] Oh, gross. I have to do it on purpose? There¡¯s no auto Toll? Too much effort and not as much Karma. I¡¯ve been stuck between Realms for decades! I think. Either way. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +527720/-166837] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277341] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109367/107275977] If nothing else at least I¡¯ve got a quick blast attack for undead assholes. Wonder if it¡¯ll purify the ghost ick weapons? I finish another bowl and one of the monks darts out of formation to pick up some more toxic weeds, -- holy shiz, did the disciples plant this stuff or are they this prolific? -- coming back and adding them to a sack before someone dips into the sack to refill my bowl. Cool. Before, if any of the ghost soldiers try to run in between any of my releasing breaths, the monks run interference until I take another one, but now I¡¯ve got a undead stunning bell of my own. It works on weak Ghost Flame attacks, too. Snuffs them right out. So I¡¯ve got guards with perfume, food, and they loot for me. Kinda. They dig up bodies for me to bank, ghost soldiers buried as booby-traps, and any corpses they find that are out of my range they drag over into my range. These really are the good guys. They don¡¯t rove out too far, just a quick, slow march around the perimeter of the town before going through it. When we stop in the center and the monks take a deep breath of the not grey air, they cheer, but no one joins them. I think all the real villagers died. I do see some salty faces pouting. Very familiar salty faces. -You fuckers tried to kill me!- I shriek. The monk holding me casually sets me down, looking away as I launch myself, transferring me and a monk that tackled me, -- how the fuck did he grab me before I transferred. Got dang! -- but the Ghost Fuckers disappear. There¡¯s a marking stone set off to the side, but I can recognize them now. Assholes. ¡°What¡¯s your problem?¡± I snap at the monk as he tries to pick me up. I shift to my hunan form, and now I¡¯m just perched on well muscled arm leaning against well muscled chest, draped across broad shoulders. ¡°Why do you have to be so fit? This is distracting. And comfy,¡± I grumble as I stretch out. ¡°Like I can literally just lay down. Why you so firm...¡± Halp... Sleep... Nu... ¡°How disgusting.¡± Warning bells go off in my facking soul when I hear Yellow Corn. I sit up and she¡¯s literally standing near the marker, slowly walking away, but not directly, just off to the side. Shit. She¡¯s going to kill the monks. ¡°How much you want to bet if he carried you you¡¯d embarrass yourself? If you get more excited, you¡¯re not allowed to touch any of them with anything, ever!¡± That¡¯s the best I got. ¡°I bet you won¡¯t¡± and ¡°I bet you will¡± are almost as insidious as ¡°I dare you¡± with people who care about their images. And based on those robes and hair, -- why the fuck are her teeth so yellow! Is that plaque? Or is this like the black teeth thing? That supposed to be gold or is she showing off a rare plant dye? -- she absolutely gives a fuck what others think of her. And she knows what looks good, which is even more annoying. I narrow my eyes at her as she saunters over to the blushing monk. Ooh! Wait! Did they catch what I did? Go team! The monk picks her up and I feel grossed out by the sounds she makes. Is she bucking? This novel is published on a different platform. Support the original author by finding the official source. ¡°Ew. Nope. Violation. Illegal! Off the field. Someone throw her in jail!¡± I shake my head, waving for the monk to put her down, and I literally have to snatch and throw her away because she won¡¯t let go. She leaves red marks, but luckily she didn¡¯t break the skin. ¡°I hope that washes off,¡± I tell him before dumping a basin filling amount of water over his head. ¡°That should help.¡± He just scrubs at his face, keeping his head bowed while some of the others laugh lightly and snicker. They look so relaxed. Why the fuck are they still here? ¡°Hey. Assholes,¡± I whisper loudly, a few of them looking over. ¡°Run!¡± I tell them to run, the little stone turns into a stone marker, and I get lifted up by Dumb Tower. The world flickers and he throws me to the ground in front of another White Masked elder, -- I wonder if they know that there are ghost servants with white masks or if they go around like that in the hopes people assume they¡¯re ghost servants so they can audit people... -- who immediately goes in on me. How dare I cost the Sect so many resources? Fuck you. Wouldn¡¯t be so bad if I wasn¡¯t already afraid of Widow¡¯s Sigh. ¡°These disciples practice and study and work very hard to get where they are, and for what? You interrupt their exercises, disrupt their rituals, you cultivated their hard won Resentments! And for what? You can go out to the Graveyards without stealing from the other disciples! What have you contributed to our sect, you greedy bug?!¡± ¡°First off, if we¡¯re not supposed to attack anyone, why was the guy with the flame tornado allowed to attack me in the Graveyards without consequence? You dropped me off, I just got a servant, and he attacked me unprovoked. Where were your rules then?¡± I ask politely. ¡°I really wanna know. Or do they not apply to everyone? ¡°I go to find new ways to farm Resentment from the monks, to take it into myself, ¡®cause that¡¯s all I was told. Gather the Resentment of the dead? It¡¯s called purifying, apparently,¡± I add. ¡°I did that. And you¡¯re berating me?¡± I walk up to Widow¡¯s Sigh. If he hits me he hits me, but I¡¯m gonna trap him in my void when he does. I¡¯ve got boxes in boxes, bish. ¡°You say I disrupted their ritual? What ritual? How was I to know? I was doing what I was told. Then, when I¡¯m eating lunch, I get attacked. A ¡®ghost¡¯ weapon right through me. Where were your rules then? Did you punish the one who attacked me?¡± I ask and Widow¡¯s Sigh just stands there, letting me talk. Okay, I¡¯ve got more. ¡°What about all of the disciples that tried to use Ghost Flame on me? It didn¡¯t work, but that¡¯s fine? There were quite a few that fed me their ghost armies, attacked me with ghost flame, and I didn¡¯t hear about them being punished. Were they punished?¡± I wait, leaning forward and Widow¡¯s Sigh doesn¡¯t say shit! ¡°Oh! It¡¯s fine if the hunans attack me, but as a non-hunan, I¡¯m not allowed to fight back?¡± He sucks his teeth, standing up straighter and crossing his arms like I¡¯m being unreasonable. At least I got a response. ¡°And you say I¡¯m not contributing? How am I supposed to contribute? No one told me shit. What am I supposed to contribute? How would I know what you want? Did you tell me anything? No! ¡°Go out and collect Resentment. Meditate and collect Resentment. No one even told me there¡¯s more than one kind! Do you want any kind of Resentment?¡± I ask, rolling my head around dramatically because I know I¡¯m going to be attacked and I¡¯m gonna be obscene with my upcoming bullshit. No such thing as a fair fight, and I don¡¯t know if they need the markers intact to use them. ¡°How am I supposed to move up in the ranks? You say don¡¯t fight, but they¡¯re fighting. I beat them so how do I advance? No one told me how to advance, but that¡¯s how it works, right?¡± I glare around at the gathering, noting one or two familiar faces, but either the people I downgraded aren¡¯t here or they ducked out when I started calling them out. I spot Fashionista, pointing at them and loudly calling out. ¡°You! You attacked me before I even passed the Graveyards test! Did you get punished or did you just talk shit when I kept beating you, huh?!¡± I shout at Fashionista who doesn¡¯t move, doesn¡¯t hide, just stands glaring back at me as the people around them quickly move out of the way. ¡°Well? Is it okay to attack people who are hoping to join the sect with ghost soldiers and Ghost Flame tornadoes? Or were you supposed to wait and attack me after I got accepted? You did both, asshole!¡± ¡°Noisy bug!¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says and I know I¡¯m going to have to kill them, too. Somehow. Everything I pointed out and I¡¯m just a noisy bug? Fuck you! ¡°Follow me! There¡¯s a way to exchange your hard work for rewards! Greedy bug!¡± ¡°Insult me one more time,¡± I snap. ¡°I don¡¯t hear you talking shit to anyone else. I¡¯m not hunan and it takes a lot more to kill me. You know who I am? You know what I am? You know how many people have tried? See if I don¡¯t start eating your Ghost Flames!¡± ¡°Come here!¡± he snaps, pausing just long enough to turn and shout at me before he continues walking. As I follow him I go over what I¡¯ve learned. I have a tone that can disrupt attacks. I shift slightly, going even more buggy. I shrink for some reason, going more tiny bug than my true form, like my hollow mass is just reshaping. Cool. Just means I have a smaller hit box. Ooh! More legs. I should be able to scurry, too. I can¡¯t eat Ghost Flame, yet. I didn¡¯t have the stones to try to bite into it. I can collect it, and I can purify it with inner peace. I guess. Unless I have some internal function that¡¯s a mantra machine chanting when I¡¯m at rest. I don¡¯t know why the fack the breathing exercise counts for Last Rites. What else? Food! I can literally throw food at people! It¡¯s not poison to me, assholes! I haven¡¯t broken down that fucking ghost pick thing, so I don¡¯t know how to reproduce that, and I don¡¯t have enough skill to wield it, but I should definitely disarm people with ghost weapons first. ¡°Here!¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh shouts, hand out to indicate two translucent girls sitting on a pile of the marker stones. Did this asshole take me to a brothel? ¡°I don¡¯t breed with the living, why would I fuck ghosts?¡± Yeah, no. That¡¯s that third insult. ¡°This is a store!¡± he snaps. ¡°You want to raise your Rank? Contribute! Make tools, sell them here! Buy tools others sell here! ¡°Donate! Early Disciples are expected to be able to donate 100 Resentment yearly! You can do more? Your position in the Sect goes up! ¡°You eat poisons? We sell poisons! You can buy or sell poisons! ¡°You need a guard? Buy spirits! You have too many spirits to use? Sell them! You can literally buy and sell spirits here! ¡°You have Resentment? Spend it! Here! Or trade with the others!¡± he finishes, full screech as he throws his hands up. Oh. He¡¯s frustrated. Hmm. Cool. Hold my tea. ¡°How.¡± Asshole. ¡°You keep saying spend it, trade it, but how?¡± ¡°Re-sent-ment. Stones.¡± he hisses, pointing at the pile of black rocks the ghost girls are sitting on. ¡°Are made by...?¡± I trail off, prompting him to continue talking. You wanna pull teeth? I¡¯m supposed to sleep for thousands of years, see if I don¡¯t outlive you. Am I really going to have to spell everything out for him? Mmm. Losing respect. This dumb motherfucker isn¡¯t scary. He¡¯s pay to win. ¡°I will reward anyone who can donate Resentment Stones to the Cataclysm,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says, all calm and collected. Bet he¡¯s sweaty and splotchy under that mask, though. ¡°Hmph.¡± Fashionista walks up with a drawstring purse, slowly opening it before upending it, dozens of flat, black, oval stones, the marker stones, falling out. He smirks and puts his purse away while the others around us, the peanut gallery, loudly whisper behind their hands. ¡°This is a simple thing.¡± ¡°Each stone is condensed negative Resentment,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says, turning to me. ¡°It¡¯s easier to pull it from the dead. It¡¯s harder from the living, although you don¡¯t seem to have the same restraints...¡± he trails off thoughtfully. ¡°Pearls are made from positive resentment. Each black oval of this size is one-hundred negative resentment,¡± he indicates the pile on the ground. Fashionista, the asshole, could have offered me the purse, but he probably wants to make me pick them up to humiliate me for his many failures. ¡°The larger stones you see, from the lanterns, to the paths, are all made from condensed Resentment, to better help with cultivating. If you want to contribute you can also maintain any structures you see that appear to be fading. We have ways of tracking this. ¡°The pearls made from positive resentment also range in size. This type of regard is harder to gain, but condensing a pearl the tip of your pinky is made with 10 positive regard, and is worth 100 negative resentment. ¡°Take those stones. Learn to condense Resentment. Tools made from this are very potent, as you well know.¡± I bank the stones while slowly turning to glare at him. I lost so much karma, and that fucking pick hurt. It felt like it was frying me from the inside out! And he¡¯s gonna just casually point out that the weapons hurt. Yeah. I do know. ¡°Assholes,¡± I grumble, pulling out one of the stones and munching on it. It¡¯s like a giant cookie, crumblier than I thought, dry, which was to be expected, but kinda spicy, like ginger spicy, which I was not expecting. ¡°Hmm... It¡¯s like gingerbread. ¡°What¡¯s they¡¯re deal?¡± I ask, pointing at the ¡°shop window¡± with my ghost will biscuit as I munch away. ¡°They¡¯re dangerous ghost with a high upkeep,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says patiently, ignoring Fashionista¡¯s crestfallen expression. If watching me eat your money is upsetting, stop watching! ¡°Ghosts have a regular upkeep that must be paid to keep them bound and functioning, otherwise their Resentment or their bodies will fade, leaving them just a husk. ¡°These two cost 100 Resentment to keep. A month. Most cannot afford it, so they stay in the shop. It would cost 1000 to buy them. You¡¯re better off starting with a better servant,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh sighs, and I wanna know who snitched on me dumping Fuck Face, and how the hell they found out. I finish the stone, absorb the others, and I can condense -Resentment. There are so many levels to it, but it¡¯s just stretching the balloon, not condensing it properly. How inelegant. Pffft. What? Condense Negative Resentment Achievement +100 [1,000 -Resentment Stones Produced] [-100,000 -Resentment] [Resentment: +527810/-76747] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277341] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109397/107275977] So one-hundred is impressive? Get on my level. I spread my legs out, turning what might still be silk makers, -- I¡¯m not looking under there again, -- into a metaphorical stone mint, -- I¡¯m not changing anything, I¡¯m just being blatantly disrespectful with where I let the produced stones fall, -- and ¡°shit¡± money. I slowly climb as I form a pile as impressive as the ghost girl zen garden. ¡°One-thousand Resentment Stones,¡± I say, tilting my head and looking down at the pile below me. ¡°You¡¯re right. It is fairly simple. Once you know how to do it.¡± I shrug and turn to Widow¡¯s Sigh. Fashionista stares at the stones, jaw dropped, and I¡¯m so disappointed that he doesn¡¯t try to take any when I move away. ¡°There¡¯s your reward. As promised. You¡¯ve been rewarded ten-fold for your contribution,¡± is all Widow¡¯s Sigh says, turning slightly to face Fashionista before giving a quick head jerk to the pile of money rocks. [1 Tear of Resentment Produced] [-10,000 -Resentment] [Resentment: +527810/-66747] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277341] [Current Qi: 1905492/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109397/107275977] ¡°They belong to me now!¡± I snap holding up what looks like a crystal tear with a cut-off image of a blue flame inside, gesturing to the two girls trapped in the window. Spoiled VI Chapter Six Fucking shard of crystallised -Resentment makes me want to shed a tear. It¡¯s so poorly edited. It¡¯s like there was a large video someone windowed and they just cut off the best parts of the flickering flame. All you get is the core, and, sometimes, at the very edges, you might see the actual flicker of flame. ¡°If they¡¯re that dangerous I¡¯m going to let them out any time someone fucks with me, since it¡¯s alright,¡± I snap, and I swear Widow¡¯s Sigh rolls his eyes at me. Why can¡¯t I see through those fookin¡¯ masks? Someone runs up to me presenting a pen and a sheet of paper. I send a quick private message in the team window to Silent Howl asking him to read the short contract real quick. Yes, it¡¯s faster for me to wake him up and get him to look over it. Pffft. Like he¡¯s not curious. ¡°The girls were created. There are several methods to create powerful spirits. You can buy poisons from our shop that will hold someone in a state of wakeful paralysis. We can interact with the flesh and the spirit. ¡°The one who made them kept them awake and paralysed for weeks while they worked. I don¡¯t think they intended for both girls to survive, but they have, as two entities linked as one. You can¡¯t separate them. They won¡¯t allow it.¡± Is this asshole telling me ghost stories right now? Why wasn¡¯t the asshole who made them punished? Is that what they were doing in the village? Trying to make more ghosts? The fuck was that spiel about ¡°just go to the Graveyards¡±? Wait. Is that how the populate the Graveyards? ... Eugh. ¡°Damaged souls tend to be weak spirits, giving you servants and lesser guards. More powerful souls can be guards or soldiers. Push too far and you might create a demon, but you know all about that,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says in the same tone as he said that fackin¡¯ ghost weapon bullshit. I swear to all if he¡¯s saying Shimmering Steel made me a demon instead of just a silk factory on purpose... No need for idle threats. I¡¯m probably going to eat everything anyway... I take a deep slow breath, steadying myself. No need to get upset... Mustn¡¯t Death Knell. No grab the ghosts. Protect. The girls. Silent Howl: The fuck is this? The first thing he points out are that there are 12 other names crossed out along the bottom of the page. The contract itself is only a few lines, but there¡¯s so many symbols woven into the paper --. Hells, the paper isn¡¯t even just paper. It¡¯s a physical binding spell. I write my name, with blood, -- ichor, -- and the bits and pieces of the girls used to create the paper, -- fuck, these people are sick, -- and my blood will mix. And they¡¯ll be bound to me. And probably kill me like they did the others. Or just watch as I get my ass handed to me, who am I to judge? ¡°They haven¡¯t had a female owner yet, and they tend to consume their male owners, so that might be common ground for the two of you.¡± One. Math? Two? Fuck all the way off. ¡°Men, women, children, animals, spirits probably. I consume everyone equally, although not all meals are equal,¡± I mumble, distracted. You wanna at me, bish? I nibble on one arm, giving myself a light wound, dip the bone shard quill, -- seriously? -- into my ¡°blood¡±, and sign under the third row of names on the contract. I feel that fackin¡¯ ghost weapon sizzle as the contract and quill go up in flames, and then the girls are standing beside me. Contracted Help Achievement +100 Form a contract? I have. Or the emperor did between me and Shimmering Steel. I think. Never got a look at it --. Holy shit, did he? Silent Howl: Focus! What is your luck? Is this what good Karma gets you? They¡¯re scary strong! Shut up! ... Thank you for your help. ¡°You¡¯re mine now,¡± I tell them, realize how awful that sounds, but Aunty somehow explains before I can figure out how to apologize. ¡°The contract... Isn¡¯t supposed to break like that,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says, holding a ghost stone blade. ¡°It didn¡¯t break!¡± Asshole! Why didn¡¯t he warn me --. Oh. And the girls hear her. Just like Fuck Face did. And they don¡¯t look pissed or vengeance-y. Sweet! They exchange a glance before shyly pulling out two money pouches, opening them and lightly tipping them in my direction. [Tribute x10] [+12 -Ghost] [39000 x10 -Resentment Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/-12)] [Resentment: +527810/-456747] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277349] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109397/107275977] ¡°Oh!¡± Shit. Why are they paying me? What? I go to my Logs to find out why they¡¯re giving me presents. ¡°The fuck is a tribute?¡± Logs aren¡¯t telling me why, just that I got loaded for no reason. ¡°Advanced spirits can collect other spirits and Resentment. One or the other. Truly, it depends on the spirit,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says as Silent Howl and Aunty tell me to shut the fuck up. ¡°What did they provide you with?¡± ¡°Protection?¡± I snark, the girls giggling behind their sleeve shrouded hands. [1 Tear of Resentment Produced] [-10,000 -Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+100/-12)] [Resentment: +527810/-446747] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277349] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109397/107275977] ¡°This is for you,¡± I hold out the tear and the girls exchange looks before they both reach out and politely accept it, holding the tiny thing with the tips of their fingers. ¡°You two hold onto this. Share it, okay?¡± Gods, their hands are so small... And what they endured... But the ones who did this to them got theirs, didn¡¯t they? I¡¯ll find out. We¡¯ll go on a cross-empire food tour if anyone¡¯s left. This should last you a few years, just so you never have to wonder where your food is coming from. ¡°Here!¡± I make them two pouches similar to the ones they kept their previous owners in. [200 -Resentment Stones Produced] [-20,000 -Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+100/-12)] [Resentment: +527810/-426747] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831238/24277341] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109397/107275977] I split the stones, 100 to each pouch and put the pouches in their pouches. ¡°For emergencies!¡± I say, gently attempting to remove one girl¡¯s hand from her pouch as she grabs one of the stones. ¡°Feed on the shard. These are for if you get separated or hurt. Let me know when you need more, okay?¡± I pat her hand, get to keep mine, and take a shaky breath. Still alive! Must keep cackles inside! I tried to move her hand and nearly fell on her. I have no way of stopping these girls. I¡¯m so fucked if they go off. Cool. What do I do now? I¡¯m not about to go into the store with them staring at me like, knowing that the tools that made them are sold here --. ¡°Oh!¡± I start as I realize I¡¯m still holding a Shard. I take the first shard I made, -- I never put it down, I just held it up and palmed it waiting for them to stop me from releasing the evil spirits, -- reach through the weird ward glass, and set the shard on the stones where the girls were. There¡¯s actually a stone bench underneath all of the stones, but it got blocked by the stones piled around it. I nod, turn, and catch sight of Fashionista still looking shell-shocked as he puts the stones in his purse. Purses. This bish is still picking up the stones. Looks like he¡¯s got spatial bags but they¡¯re only so so. Heh. Oh, right. ¡°What have I contributed?¡± I shout, pointing at Widow¡¯s Sigh¡¯s face, picking up on my earlier rant. I didn¡¯t run out of steam, I was busy! ¡°¡®Disciples contribute 100 Resentment a year¡¯? You owe me now!¡± -Thank you. Master,- the girls say, bowing their heads respectfully while I gag and try to comb off the ick. -Sandy is fine!- I shudder, shimmying and flailing as I try to dislodge the grossness. And a whole lot of fear, ¡®cause Master is what the dead people in my Ghost Pot were called. The girls exchange looks, giggle, and then pull out small knives. You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. Oh, fuck me. I don¡¯t even bother running. They¡¯re ghosts, right? They look--. They¡¯ve got meat suits. Oh, I¡¯m fucked. They do a respectful bow, a quick dip, heads lowered, before cutting off a lock of their hair, maybe two inches from a small section at the bottom of their waist long length. Then while I¡¯m waiting for them to end me they bow again, offering me their hair. Aunty hiss whispers for me to take it, so I take the bundle of hair from both of them, cheers, and eat it. [Feeding(Qi) x2 Successful] [1 x2 Con. Qi] [Karma 100 x2 Gained] [Ghost Pot (+100/-12)] [Resentment: +527810/-426747] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831240/24277399] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97109597/107275977] Yeah, that¡¯s cultivator hair. Fack, they¡¯re strong as shit. Oh, gods, I¡¯m having a heart attack. Hopefully it takes me out before they get their hands on me. The girls gasp, stiffening, growing taller, appearing to age a few years, -- holy shit, they really were just kids, -- their irises cycling through a rainbow of colors. They cheer and laugh, bouncing and lacing their hands together. Ack. I hope they know how to preserve corspes. No wait. I do now. From the Soldiers. Fack. I never got Fuck Face a proper body. Yay, forgetfulness? Or was that why he kept shifting the pick through my innards? That¡¯s a fucked up reminder. I can respect it. Fack. I¡¯m the asshole. -Let¡¯s go,- I sigh, head lowered as I give them a weak wave to get them to follow. -I gotta go apologize...- They skip over to me, hop to a stop, and just beam while holding hands. They¡¯ll probably giggle like they are now when they kill me. Oh, fack, I¡¯ve got natural glitter. Yeah, they¡¯re definitely arts-and-crafts-ing my ass... I sigh again and transfer us back to the village. I¡¯ve been all up in the place, courtesy of the monks, so I know it well enough. And it¡¯s way faster than the markers. Speaking of. ¡°Can you use Stone Markers to move around?¡± I turn my head to look back at the girls. They giggle, jump, disappear, and then come screaming at me from a different direction. ¡°Oh, fuck!¡± They stop, laughing hysterically, and I realize they did the show not tell thing. Don¡¯t. Call. Them. Bitches... I hold my breath and wait for the urge to pass. There¡¯s a marker, several probably, nearby. They can move to them without moving to them. Cool. ¡°Thank you?¡± I wheeze out before taking a deep breath. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [-1 -Ghost x10] [Ghost Pot (+100/-2)] [3 x12 -Resentment Gained] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +528810/-435680] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831240/24281278] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97125112/107275977] Sweet, there¡¯s still incense --. Oh, shi--! -That wasn¡¯t an attack! I was just breathing! Don¡¯t hit me!- I shriek at the girls, crouched down arms up to shield, defend, and sacrifice in case I have to run. I can grow a new arm! Silent Howl: Why¡¯d I stay awake for this? I¡¯m going back to bed. Aunty tells me to stop embarrassing myself just as a group of monks race from the paths leading to the square, -- why the fuck did I drop down into the middle of town?! -- arms raised, cheering loudly. The sisters immediately spin up, rising into the air -- -- and look in confusion at their censers. They¡¯re just floating, with golden filigree, round, covered incense censers on the end of a long thick chain, leading to --. What is that? They¡¯re wearing gold filigree masks. Veils. Oh, my gods, they¡¯re wearing muzzles shaped like veils with locks on the back, locked by the chains leading to the censer. -I didn¡¯t do that...- They¡¯re going to castrate me. The monks, -- smarter than me, unfortunately, -- go back into their purification formation, but now they¡¯ve got us surrounded. There¡¯s chanting, that fucking sharp knocking drum is being tapped, -- Aunty tells me to show respect, but that loud tap is annoying. Even a big bassy drum would be annoying! -- and the incense in the area thickens. The girls bristle, their censers pouring out smoke, and then one of the monks sounds a bell. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites II Enhanced] [-100 x10 HP] [Karma +100 x10 Gained] [100 x10 +Resentment Gained] [-1 -Ghost x2] [Ghost Pot (+100/-0)] [3 x2 -Resentment Gained] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +530810/-436140] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831240/24281783] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97127132/107275977] ¡°Ah...¡± I drone, trying to pop my ears, -- thought I didn¡¯t have any? -- wondering how to get rid of tinnitus. One of the monks claps me on the shoulder, scaring the shit outta me, and I frantically look around to see the monks laughing. And the girls are sitting on my ass. Let¡¯s see those skinny bitches do that. They¡¯d fall right off! Why are they sitting on my back? ¡°Kisandera the Clever!¡± One of the monks jokes, and I missed the rest. How long have they been talking shit? I accept a bowl of washed poisonous greens, sitting down and going into my Logs to find out ¡°WTF?¡±. Um... Tone. Girls purified. Ooh! And the collected Resentment! That¡¯s nice. Probably get that later if they don¡¯t use it. Um-mum-mum... Weren¡¯t injured? Karmic chains deflected the Purification attempt, wuh? No seriously. Silent Howl: Couldn¡¯t sleep with that much stupid. Your Karma? The girls are bound to you. You¡¯re sharing it now? As long as your positive karma outweighs your negative Resentment, and theirs, you two should be fine. And it¡¯s two because they count as one object not two entities. Assholes. ¡°Don¡¯t hit me!¡± You for real right now? I look over with everyone else, as a festering corpse runs up, drops to their knees, then prostrates themselves, bowing and raising their hands in surrender over and over again. -BRB,- I broadcast, snatching up Fuck Face and the girls to my void. -How the fuck did you survive? Oh!- Before they can explain I scrap their body and build a new one. Reinforced flesh and bone, no organs, can I donate ichor instead of using that weird poison blend they have for the --. Better not. First time, so shouldn¡¯t doctor the recipe too much. Probably. Upgrade the abdominal cavity for spatial storage, -- void bug shit. Let¡¯s see the others try this! -- he¡¯s pretty handy with a sickle, so black iron sickle ¡®cause we got it... Everyone else can suck it. What else? Can he use Qi? Qi reserve... Gonna have to look into that... Oh! Cores! Core? Core! Um... I think I can... Yes! I can produce Jade, stash energy into it, oh, it can convert it? Like some fucked up transformer battery system? Do that! Solid energy what...? What else did they build into the soldiers? Oh! Stone Marker for transport... And... No. This is a first draft. Produce that shit! Ghost Soldier Achievement +50 [Ghost Lieutenant Produced] [-100 Con. Qi] [-500 Karma] [-5000 -Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+100/-0)] [Resentment: +530810/-431140] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24281658] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97126632/107275977] -There! New body! Don¡¯t stab me any more!- I start off happy enough, but I snap, pissed off all over again by the time I finish. ¡°I wasn¡¯t trying to hurt you!¡± Fuck Face drops to his knees, sinking in and nearly burying his head in the dirt when he tries to knock it against the ground. While he¡¯s staring in confusion at the damage he¡¯s doing I go to my Logs. Ghost Weapon... Burn? No.. Poison! Soul Poison... Isn¡¯t that a drink? Soul Poison... Fuck Face... Okay! He noticed I couldn¡¯t breathe, hurt himself interacting with the weapon, didn¡¯t think he¡¯d be able to hold it long enough to remove it, so tried to detach whatever organ it was connected to. Oh! I can grow new shit. Okay. Why the pushy? He honestly didn¡¯t notice the back of the pick. He¡¯s not malicious. He¡¯s dumber than I am. Kinda hurts. -Okay, I understand I¡¯m one to talk, especially considering how much you¡¯ve done, but you really are a shitty servant,- I finally admit. ¡°You literally picked me up out of the garbage and never fixed me,¡± he points out, standing tall and imposing in his powerful new deluxe flesh suit. Maybe I shouldn¡¯t have given him a super awesome reinforced sickle. ¡°Or replaced me.¡± And he has a point. Several. ... -Fuck it,- I throw my hands up, turn, and the girls squeal and hop on my back again. -Oh, uh. I don¡¯t know if I can make you girl bodies.- ¡°You don¡¯t have to. They¡¯re contracted. They made their own,¡± Fuck Face points out, slinging a harvest sack onto his shoulder. They did what? I look and the girls, -- they know where my Ultravision is... -- strike poses like I¡¯m flying a drone. They look healthy, but Fuck Face does at the start. Shit, am I? Visible. Not a healthy young girl. That¡¯s conspicuous as hells. I thought that was for --. Does this count as remote viewing? I thought that was proxy remote viewing. Shit. They... Look alive. -You¡¯re not actually alive, are you?- I ask, deeply concerned that they¡¯ve got parasites in their personally customised bodies. In response one of them turns around and blows on my antenna. One, how the fuck did they know? I forget and they¡¯re my antenna! Two, their breath is warm, moist, and smells like breath. Not corpse breath, and not I ate too much pickled garlic, but definitely living breath. -Fuck, I don¡¯t have food,- I panic and Fuck Face sighs loudly, rolling his eyes and his entire fucking head. ¡°They sustain themselves with Resentment. You can try giving them positive regard if you don¡¯t want them getting corrupted over the centuries,¡± he finishes sarcastically. ¡°Now take us back out. They didn¡¯t kill all of the villagers, and some came back. I need to point out the disciples to the monks, so this shit doesn¡¯t happen again.¡± How¡¯s he so stupid and so useful? Silent Howl: Learned it from watching you? Go to sleep! Asshole... Spoiled VI Chapter Seven Silent Howl: I could... Or... ... I¡¯m not encouraging this bullshit. If he wants to tell me something, he can. Silent Howl: :( Fuck off with your bullshit... Silent Howl: Tch! Bad example for broken servants everywhere. This bish...? Silent Howl: Go check your logs for when the girls accepted the contract. I signed --. They didn¡¯t have to accept? Oh, shit! I never Accepted did I? No, I probably did with all kinds of stipulations that were never acknowledged. Wow. Shit! Read! Logs! Um... No rape --. Oh, ew! No! Um... Pay for upkeep. Did that. Bodies. Did that. No rape --. Fack! Wait. No. No no. Not going down why No rape is for with or without bodies... Spirit Manipulation. Got it. What else... No hurting them for no reason. I¡¯m assuming they mean when they¡¯re not at fault. Everyone can come up with a reason for anything. The sun rises so I eat? Boom! I¡¯m hungry. I bring up a little table with food, Fuck Face sighing loudly before asking the girls if they want anything. They¡¯d like candied hawthorne. -Fuck is that?- I ask while gnawing on a soup dumpling, just nibbling and drinking it to death. ¡°When you go to a city I can show you,¡± Fuck Face sighs before apologizing to the girls. -I don¡¯t really have much hunan food,- I point out, the girls pouting as they look at my spread. ¡°Death bean, corpse meat, various toxic greens--,¡± that paralyse among other things. -Some of which you might remember, sorry... Robbed a poison guild for snacks...- One of them sputters and then they¡¯re laughing behind their hands, holding up their sleeves and just sitting there, heads together. No longer angry, question mark? I can hope. Silent Howl: Broken servants take for fucking ever to read. Eat me. Where was I...? Stipulations? Contract. Deal breakers... No rapes. Plural. No torture, gonna have to find out what that is, because I don¡¯t consider my singing torture, but I will take it up a few notches to be annoying so... And twerking isn¡¯t torture. Um-mum-mum... No shaving or cutting their hair. I didn¡¯t, they did. No humiliation, no disrobing them, no taking away their clothes, no butchering, no skinning, no --. Holy fuck. -I... I need to make sure I don¡¯t break the contract, but this is rough...- I say before flinching. -Not that I¡¯m saying reading this is --.- How to apologize without sounding like Widow¡¯s Sigh... -I¡¯ll just shut up...- Silent Howl: Good on you for showing due diligence, fuck you for making me read this. I meant look at what you got. Eh? I got condensed Qi? Which I have not been condensing, so that was nice. So... No boiling... [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+100/-0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x100 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x100 Gained] [Resentment: +530810/-431361] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24281656] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97126627/107275977] ... I stop and just take a deep breath... Then my eyes slowly widen in panic. I huff out a breath, collapsing in relief. ¡°You can¡¯t exorcise them that easily. Even without a contract,¡± Fuck Face sighs, sitting down, one knee up, elbow propped on his knee, and chin propped on his hand. -Okay, all of you fuck off, I¡¯m trying to make sure I don¡¯t fuck up this contract!- I snap at him and Silent Howl before the girls shift to hop off. -Not you two. I¡¯m trying to find out what you said and Silent Howl and Fuck Face are annoyed it¡¯s taking me so long!- When they titter at his name I realize I haven¡¯t named them. -Do I have to name you?- ¡°They¡¯re named,¡± Fuck Face says before I can say anything else. ¡°Sweet Pea Blossom!¡± one of the girls chirps, voice clear and sweet and scaring the shit outta me. ¡°Chrysanthemum Petal!¡± the other girl says when the first lowers her hand and prompts her with a patient look. Holy shit, they can talk. -Um... So what I¡¯m understanding from the contract is don¡¯t be a monster, but I am, just not the way you¡¯re used to,- I say slowly. I¡¯m self-aware, thank you. -*I consume, but I don¡¯t swarm, and I¡¯m very poisonous. And I think venomous. Usually if I¡¯m biting someone I¡¯m trying to eat them? So... -And if the contract is to not be a dick, then it¡¯s going to break because I call him fuck face regularly, and it¡¯s not just because that¡¯s what I accidentally named him,- I point out, Fuck Face giving a bored wave, sighing and tuning right back out. ¡°You need a new servant?¡± The girls hop off of my back. ¡°We¡¯ll destroy this one. You can use the body for a better one. It¡¯s much too good for garbage like him.¡± ¡°His soul is very fractured.¡± The other girl whispers. I¡¯m so screwed. I don¡¯t remember which one was which, and going to my Logs is gonna look super suspicious. And what if they trade places while I¡¯m looking up who said what? Wait, what? -No! Don¡¯t destroy!- I finally register what the girls said as they pull out their little paring knives. Fuck Face is smart enough to start scrabbling backwards, but not coordinated enough to not look horrifying as fuck as he incidentally crab walks backwards at mach speeds. -Um. He¡¯s a broken servant? I¡¯m a broken servant! How can I judge? He makes himself useful, although with this new body I¡¯m hoping that the Resentment helps repair his soul a bit more. Maybe... Dude, I feel like an asshole,- I deflate as I turn to look at him. -*A year? Give him a year to be productive. He¡¯s helped with the garden, but I could do that by just paying attention. -One year to develop your own skillset.- I sigh. -That sound fair?- You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. ¡°I can talk to outsiders!¡± Fuck Face scrabbles to his feet. ¡°The girls are probably afraid --.¡± ¡°What reason do we have to fear?¡± one of them says, turning him from their sight. -Dude, they¡¯ve killed and eaten 12 cultivators. Disciples from the Ghost Flame Sect if I have that right. Them are stronk,- I remind him. They learn from my behaviors? Any time someone called me weak I¡¯d find a way to get back at ¡®em. These girls are actual fighters, though. ¡°Well, you probably don¡¯t want to talk to strangers?¡± he points out. I get that he¡¯s working the PTSD route, but they went combat mode and then started chilling with the monks while I was waiting for my ears to stop ringing. ¡°We were locked away for 10 years! Stupid men trying to bribe us with Resentment stones? See if we don¡¯t end them!¡± Oh~! That¡¯s why there were so many rocks in there... -Don¡¯t think you¡¯re winning with the shy or trauma angle,- I point out, ¡®cause I¡¯m actually not a complete idiot. -Give it time. For now, think about it while I go back to read the contract? Hm? Convenient enough for you?- Okay, so back to the flower girls --. -Ow~! What?!- Each one of them let go of the antenna they were pulling on, pouting and glaring at me. -Wait, is that one of the reasons you were picked? Nevermind. Twin Knives, with your paring blades?- ¡°Bone shards from when we were created,¡± the more aggressive one whips out the blade and threatens me with it. -Cool, keep threatening me. If you have access to my logs see how well that works out,- I snap, going back to said Logs. -Ask Aunty to show you around the Library!- Whole room full of assholes, and I¡¯m one of them. Fuck, that hurt! They weren¡¯t just tugging, they were going to rip them off! Out! Oh, they¡¯re socketed? Ew. So... They were blossoming girls with flower names, and not sisters? Wait, what¡¯s --. Oh! Um... Not sisters. Best friends. Close families. Playing in the fields, kidnapped on the way home, killed in an abandoned temple... Ah... So the censers weren¡¯t my fault. Or are they those melon meteor things? What the fuck is a --. I remember meteor chains and melon weapons. Library is handy, so why not the candied...? Oh. Sweet hawthorn, candied hawthorn, sugar hawthorn. And chestnuts. I can probably make some poison versions of this stuff. Wonder if it¡¯ll be any good? Focus, me! On what? What was I...? Logs...? Oh. Yeah, no. I don¡¯t want to read how they were made, but now I have that information in my Library, hopefully under lock and key, ¡®cause fuck that information ever getting out. -Contract!- [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+120/-0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +533210/-431994] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,475] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24283418] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97133672/107275977] Silent Howl: Never you mind! They figured it out! Da fuq he on about? Something about the peanut gallery? Or the girls? Fuck Face? He said ¡°they¡±, so I¡¯m assuming he¡¯s talking about ghosts. Um. Contract. Going to assume it¡¯s summed up as don¡¯t be a creepy dick, and if I¡¯m not and they don¡¯t kill me, -- I hope that¡¯s in my contract, but doubt it. I was gonna use them as a nuclear option. Figured they were the insane kinda ghosts, -- I get 10 more positive slots in my Ghost Pot per girl. Wait. What¡¯s my Ghost Pot at? [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] That¡¯s handy. Oh! That¡¯s twenty. Oh! 10 per. I look up, slowly climbing to my feet as I hear voices chanting in unison before the girls smile and start quietly chanting as well. -Contracts?- Da fuq are they on about. -Oy! Peanut Gallery! What?- ¡°Spirit Contracts. Like you can make with powerful spirits. Such as gods. Or just anything strong enough to make Spirit Contracts,¡± Fuck Face sighs, sitting back down. ¡°I¡¯m a pretty good advisor? I help dumb stuff down so you understand it.¡± -Noted! What else?- I ask, not impressed. He¡¯s expensive, I think. Unless cost scales up. ¡°Look at your ¡®Spirit Contracts¡¯,¡± he says, the girls taking on prayer poses and ohm-ing for some reason. I try to make the sound, and it feels like I¡¯m taking a deep breath, but I¡¯m exhaling and I¡¯m sitting in my void, the starry version, with a screen that says Spirit Contracts. Apparently I¡¯ve got 1 of 5. The contract? As long as I¡¯m good to the girls the girls will be good to me. See, I¡¯m glad I read my Logs, ¡®cause that¡¯s not at all what the stipulations say. Well, they do, but it¡¯s don¡¯t fuck with us and we won¡¯t fuck with you, but with some clarifications with awful implications. -Dodged that bullet!- I cheer. Okay, so Silent Howl wanted me to go to my Logs to find out what I get from the contract, which would be 10 positive spirit slots in my Pot per girl, and... The ability to make 5 contracts instead of 1? Dude, what if all the other contract holders thought they wanted boyfriends and got taken out immediately. Is that why people keep ¡°gifting¡± them stones? Wow. I might read slow, but I read. That¡¯s a lie. So what do I have with Fuck Face? ¡°He¡¯s a bound familiar! There¡¯s no contract. It¡¯s based on Regard and Resentment. As long as he has more Regard for you than Resentment you own him,¡± the aggressive girl perks up, sucking her teeth, rolling her eyes, and putting down her spoon before glaring at me. -What the fuck are you eating?- I squeak, trying to rise to my feet and figure out if they¡¯re dying. ¡°Milled fruit,¡± the quiet one says, drumming her heels against my side. ¡°¡®Pureed¡¯,¡± the aggressive one calms, smiling while waving her spoon to enunciate the elegant new word I guess the learned. ¡°Ground very fine and mixed with milk, cooled, and you have a superior shaved ice!¡± And I learn, or I¡¯m reminded, that I do in fact have lots of hunan foods from the Tributes I¡¯d gotten. Including candied hawthorns, but I guess they wanted to go on a culinary adventure. Learn from me, indeed! That¡¯s gonna be a problem. Wait, these bitches are eating ice cream. Oh, gods, I have ice cream?! My excitement is cut short by the angry one cuffing me over the back of the head. Cool. -Cultivators, right?- I try to remember what makes hunans cultivator. -And living now?- I can disrupt essence, eat Qi... If I eat their bodies --. No eating is in the contract, but that things about to be voided. ¡°Why call us names?¡± Angry Tot whines. -Why not?- I retort. I remember putting living things in storage was a bad, but that was before the upgrades... ¡°No...!¡± Angry Tot whines, Quiet Tot just silently crying into her ice cream. Oh, right. If one goes they both go. Bet I know which one got them caught. ¡°Seriously?¡± Fuck Face says, and I get the same message from Silent Howl while Aunty just calls me a bastard. -A bastard that lived in a death coma for a few decades while people used my not corpse. I¡¯ve been tried,- I grumble, still going through my options. If I¡¯m gonna get punished for something I do on the regular, this contract is going to break real quick, why should I tolerate abuse? ¡°I¡¯m sorry!¡± she shouts, flinging herself in place. Tantrum go grr. ¡°Truce. You don¡¯t be mean, and I won¡¯t hit you.¡± -Holy shit, after all you went through you think me saying bitch is mean?- I chortle. -Imagine me being mad that you started riding me! I¡¯ve been ridden. I¡¯ve been starved. I¡¯ve been called names out of ¡°meanness¡±. I get mad if I¡¯m called an idiot too many times, because the people who did it killed me over and over again. I¡¯m too dumb to care, right? Oy!- I turn to Fuck Face. -What was the first thing you said to me?- ¡°I called you fuck face, and you called me fuck face back. That counted as naming,¡± Fuck Face mumbles, perking up to see what I wanted then tuning back out while answering. -Do I restrict you in any way? Besides not transferring you every time you want?- I ask, the girls sitting sullenly on my back. ¡°If you did you¡¯d have to figure out this shit on your own,¡± he snorts. He tenses, eyes darting to the girls and I can see the panic. ¡°Stuff.¡± -Fuck your ¡°stuff¡±,- I mumble. I¡¯m supposed to be in charge and I¡¯m not hurting anyone so why should we be afraid? I really am pissed. I¡¯m fear raging again. Well, this won¡¯t end well. Someone¡¯s ¡®bout to die again. Ha! ¡°No, you¡¯ve been a lot calmer with the added spirits. You don¡¯t run or fight as much,¡± Fuck Face points out. ¡°Remember? You learned how to be as subtle as a brick through a glass pane instead of just burning down the building.¡± I totally could have just carved up and collected the Red Silk Spider Sects hideout and stored the stone. -Petty,- I say. -*I¡¯ve learned to be more petty and less destructive. Pretty sure this counts. -How about you don¡¯t try to censor me when I¡¯m at home, just because you think I can¡¯t hurt you, and I continue to not hurt you?- I offer, looking both girls dead in the face even if they can only see the back of my head. ¡°They¡¯ve got Ultravision, too,¡± Fuck Face points out, and the girls glare at him, causing him to wilt. -Stop fucking with Fuck Face,- I give one good shake, but they move without looking like they were gonna fall at all. -*Oh! Maybe they can train you! So you can be a real guard! -Train doesn¡¯t mean torture!- I snap, refocusing on the girls. They flinch and nod. It¡¯s a good idea, and I¡¯m not being an asshole. She, -- they, fack! -- were being pushy, trying to throw their weight around. I can¡¯t fight for shit, but that doesn¡¯t mean I¡¯m not dangerous. -Tch! Ice cream sounded good, too,- I grumble, climbing to my feet, the girls staying firmly planted like they¡¯re strapped in. -What was on the schedule for today?- ¡°Helping rebuild the village,¡± Fuck Face says, standing up, sickle and harvesting bag appearing. ¡°Probably some more Resentment. If you girls feel ragey, dump some my way.¡± Spoiled VI Chapter Eight -Back --. Stawp~!- I pout as I come back and the monks prepare to kick my ass, then calm down. -I¡¯ve got three ghost things now. The two girls and the other one. Don¡¯t attack ¡®em, ¡®kay? I think the other one was a commoner before they died, and they¡¯re pissed off about what happened to the village.- Do us proud, Fuck Face. I transfer Face to stand beside me and the monks back off and change formation. I guess they were ready for soup bag not suped up. I turn to look at Fuck Face, comparing the body I crafted with his earlier forms. It¡¯s not rotting yet. It looks intimidating, even when he lowers his head, bowing and explains his intentions, -- we¡¯re goin¡¯ huntin¡¯! -- but the monks are listening. I do good work. Go me! ¡°We¡¯re relying on you,¡± a monk says, turning to me and bowing. I¡¯m not --. Oh! He¡¯s my servant. Fuck this is gonna take some getting used to. -Don¡¯t forget this body is stronger than your other one, and you weren¡¯t so good at using it.- Yeah, please don¡¯t kill people by flinging trees at them. -Start slow.- ¡°Yeah,¡± he sighs with a quick shake of his head before slowly walking away. Yeah, no, longer legs, I made him big. ¡°He¡¯ll tell us if he finds any more disciples --,¡± one girl says to me. ¡°-- and we¡¯ll take care of them,¡± the other finishes, pulling out her little bone knife. Did they switch places? I can¡¯t remember... They hop off my back and bow. Are they going with Fuck Face? ¡°We were trying to purify the village when you came back,¡± one monk says while tucking me into the crook of his arm. Oh, come on! I throw my hands up in indignation and the traitorous bastards come down as they accept a bowl of stewed greens, my renegade mouth partaking while my turncoat spiracles --. I was mad and I accepted a bowl of food while making happy noises. No hesitation. Started grubbing immediately. Hopefully because I¡¯m cool with these guys, and not just because I¡¯m greedy. It¡¯d be rude to turn it down, especially after all the work they put into making them. They had to find the poison grass, they collected a whole bag, clean it, collect water, find a pot they were willing to throw away, not inhale poison steam, treat any wounds, and who knows what else! A lot of work went into boiling these weeds for me. -Ooh! Mixed greens...- There¡¯s lots of different weeds! That one tastes like lemongrass! I finished the boiled greens, the bowl refilled with what might be the broth. I drink that down and then the bowl is filled with stir-fried greens. Shiz, they went all out! That¡¯s down the gullet and then I¡¯m handed chopsticks, -- need hands, fack, I¡¯m a partial bug with human hands. Why do I do this to myself? -- and then there¡¯s grasses, still raw and fresh, folded into decorative knots. When I eat one I find out the middle is filled with some kind of milled green paste. Fack, someone was having fun! I laugh, making sounds of appreciation as I keep eating. Once the knots are done, -- I think they might have been woven, not knotted. People are so creative! -- I¡¯m given what looks like a rice ball. [Blessings Rice Ball] [10 Karma Gained] [10 +Resentment Gained] [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+120/-0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +535220/-434646] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,449] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24283905] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97135622/107275977] I bite into it and there¡¯s some weird jelly filling. -Ah, bish!- You can condense karma?! What! Wait. Yeah, no they made it a jelly! Or added to a jelly... I¡¯ve got a karma sticky rice ball! Wait. Oh! Positive Resentment. You can condense --. Yeah, no, that makes sense. I pull my attention away from the rice ball, trying to thank the monks, and they¡¯re laughing at me. And pointing. ... Ack! I¡¯m wagging my ass like it¡¯s a tail. -Ah, this is bullshit...- I hear groans and whines as I stop wagging and I mock them as I polish off the rice ball. -So are we gonna do a run around the village?- ¡°We already did!¡± one monk crows, the others laughing. Come again? ¡°You purify faster when distracted with food,¡± one monk tells me, literally leaning his face forward like he¡¯s daring me to punch him. -I feel used...- I sigh, moving my head away as they offer another roll. ¡°It takes a lot out of you to purify, yes? We¡¯re making sure you don¡¯t go into a coma!¡± one monk quietly chastises me before offering me the rice ball again... I grumble a thank you and take the fackin¡¯ rice ball. Tch. [Blessings Rice Ball] [10 Karma Gained] [10 +Resentment Gained] [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+120/-0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +535230/-434646] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24283908] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97135632/107275977] Boo... Wait, what have the girls been doing? I sit up, -- still being carried, -- and look for the little knives. They¡¯re playing hopscotch with some of the village children, jumping in and out of a circle in some pattern I could look up if I wanted to. ¡°They¡¯re teaching the children prayers,¡± my bearer murmurs, watching the children play. ¡°Truly, you are a strange treasure...¡± -What¡¯s the other guy up to?- He wants to update me without me having to read? Let him! ¡°Tch! Fuck Face,¡± one monk scowls and shakes his head, and I wonder if I¡¯m gonna have to run. ¡°To give a good man such an awful name! He told us why, and you couldn¡¯t have known, but his karma must be terrible!¡± -So he¡¯s doing good...?- Mixed signals, dude. Come on. ¡°He¡¯s very good, and familiar with some country customs, which has been a blessing,¡± one monk says, a few of them doing a quick prayer. ¡°It¡¯s amazing that you¡¯ve given him access to your storage without him having to consult with you constantly.¡± Do what now? -Of course. Reconstruction isn¡¯t fast or cheap. Materials are necessary.- The fuck is he grabbing and why? Logs, Requests? Empty. How? I know he Withdraws --. No way am I that--. I¡¯m that dumb. You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author. Fack! Didn¡¯t I set it to where people couldn¡¯t take shit? Or is this some of that ¡°we¡¯re linked¡± bullshit. ¡®Cause sharing is caring when it comes to my shit. -That one,- one of the girls sends whispers, leaning forward from across the town center, hand cupped to her mouth. Message hidden. Sending not so much so. Heh. Focus! Um... Withdrawing. No one¡¯s whitelisted. Withdrawals? He¡¯s made some very simple ones. Where the fuck is he getting the stuff? Filtered. Unfiltered? My face goes blank as I read he just fucking picked it up off the ground. -Bullshit!- I thrash, startling as the girls try to calm down a few of the people I startled. When the fuck did they come over to me and why are these assholes gawking. Silent Howl: You¡¯re doing your Death Dance and they¡¯re going towards the pretty lights. Idiots. Oy! Go to bed! Silent Howl: I did. And woke up. Check your Logs. My sense of time is fine. ... Shots fired. Confirmed hits. Ow. I listen for laughter and hear rhythmic chanting and that fucking tok tok drum! Wait, where¡¯s it --? I spin around and some of the monks are chanting while the rest not on cleanup duty are enjoying the show. Violated. I put them out of my sight, sitting down, arms going back into toothed scythe mode so I can groom. What was this nonsense about him picking the shit up off the ground? Um... Lengths of wood beams. Okay. Where did the wood beams come from. I produced them. A while ago. ... Why? I shift over to structures. And, according to my logs, I thought up the shit I¡¯d need to make my shit shack, made it, dumped it in the woods at the edge of the lake, produced the shack, and just blatantly ignored a pile of wood beams the rest of the time I¡¯ve been walking around the edge of the lake. I call bullshit. Silent Howl: They¡¯re less obvious than notifications, and you ignore those easily enough. I blink. Loudly clear my throat, -- don¡¯t have one, -- and repeat myself. I call bullshit, ¡®cause there¡¯s no way I¡¯d ignore a pile of stacked wooden beams. My void, my reality, fuck you. What else did I leave lying around? Supposedly. Baskets, robes, he¡¯s using some of the stuff the bears left behind, brushes. Why the fuck did I make so many brushes? Every time I think about grooming? So. Many. Brushes. Why not combs? -You have combs,- one of the girls says, lifting her foot to delicately point to my currently combing me arms. ¡®Cause of course I have an audience when I fuck up. -You have an audience when you do godly things,- one girl, -- same girl? Dunno. -- pointedly looks away to stare at the monks performing tricks like we¡¯re part of a roving circus and my lights are just part of the show. Why can¡¯t they just let me be mad. The girls titter as I turn my back on them and the monks, then glare at a bunch of people enjoying the show. Did they already get rid of the people from the sect? We ever find out what the fack they were trying to do? [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+120/-0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +535330/-434867] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24283931] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97135727/107275977] My head nearly twists off as I stare dumbfounded. Motherfucker, can¡¯t I just breathe? The girls laugh, but I¡¯m not at all amused. When will this shit stop? Silent Howl: You have no idea how groundbreaking this is. I can literally map out their breathing technique, and double check it against their manual, by knowing how essence travels through your body when you take a deep breath. You¡¯re not just sighing. You¡¯re inhaling very deeply and using different muscles, opening new chambers. You don¡¯t care, but this is very impressive. Wait, essence traveling through my innards is what¡¯s causing this? ¡°Not gonna ask. We¡¯ve torn down most of the damaged structures and they¡¯ve restarted construction on one of the storage sheds, but they¡¯ll be hiding outside of town until they¡¯re sure it¡¯s safe,¡± Fuck Face says, striding up like a confident badass. Someone got comfy in their skin. ¡°The villagers are grateful for the clothes and house materials.¡± I bet they are. ¡°I¡¯ve found a few more toxic bulbs and grasses, and the village isn¡¯t clear yet.¡± I perk up ¡®cause that part sounds important. And isn¡¯t about food. What kinda bulbs? -Wait, why don¡¯t the villagers want to stay in the --. Nevermind.- Right. Bad guys are still here. Do they need lots of bodies in one place? ¡°The village has a bad history. The people that did this aren¡¯t trying to create new Resentments, they¡¯re bringing up old ones. That¡¯s why it gets so thick so fast,¡± Fuck Face says, dropping down close enough for me to inspect his corpse with my bare eyes. ¡°No, the body¡¯s holding up fine. I¡¯ve found a few techniques I need to practice. Learning how you breathe helps,¡± he admits. Do what now? -He¡¯s learning to cycle Qi through his body without the benefit of lungs or organs to cycle through by learning how you cycle Qi through you body with your different organs,- one of the girls says as they come over and sit on my back again. -Someone tell the villagers there¡¯s no pony rides before someone dies and or gets their feelings hurt,- I say quickly as some of the adults bend down and whisper to children while pointing at me with their rude asses. ¡°Yeah, no, you¡¯re too toxic for living people to ride. We¡¯re dead,¡± Fuck Face says, showing why he¡¯s such a good servant. He snorts and flips me off. Good boy. ¡°Fuck off.¡± -There are children present!- I gasp in mock outrage. -Language!- ¡°Says the bug that shouts bullshit and sprays death everywhere when they think too hard?¡± he says with such casual disregard. Not gonna lie, that was pretty good. These people don¡¯t know what I¡¯m doing. They don¡¯t know me. I¡¯m literally just a creepy hunan-ish shaped bug, and I do keep broadcasting sometimes. Welp. Imma go be loud and obnoxious somewhere quiet. ¡°We¡¯re leaving now,¡± Fuck Face says, standing up and just deciding for everyone. ¡°Sandy¡¯s past due for a nap. I don¡¯t know when we¡¯ll be back, but there¡¯s plenty of supplies. Hopefully we¡¯ve bought you enough time for a reprieve.¡± Fuck Face takes the time to bow to the monks before turning and waving goodbye to the people standing around. I can feel myself trying to stay awake out of spite, and I don¡¯t know why. Did he just say it¡¯s time to put baby down for a nap? ¡®Cause what I think he said was that I¡¯m going to go to sleep soon, but it feels like he said it¡¯s past baby¡¯s nap time. ¡°Come on, grump ass,¡± Fuck Face rumbles, stretching as the girls hop off my back, one of them picking me up easily. I bristle indignantly and she just laughs and runs her hands over my silk. If she starts melting she better not try to blame me. She snorts and buries her face in my silk on my head, inhaling deeply before pulling back with a smirk, looking smug AF. ¡°Their cultivation is high enough that they don¡¯t need mantras,¡± Fuck Face points out, breaking my glare. Fack! I blinked! I don¡¯t even need to blink! Why the fack do I even have eyelids? Fack! I transfer to the void so I can fuck off to bed, and the girls fly their happy asses to my house. Shit. Beds. I tack on another part of the house, enough space for a bedroom for them to share, a private sitting room linking to the main area of the house, windows shuttered with death wood. They won¡¯t be affected but anything else not a Death Moth will. They whoop, the one carrying me flinging me into my room on my bed before they race off to their room. They fucking threw me! Rude asses... I head outside for a quick wash, shifting to full hunan, the girls racing out with their knives at the sound of the buckets and water prolly, and then I¡¯m back inside getting dressed for bed. -Night,- I yawn as I climb under my sheets, and then I¡¯m buried as the brats jump on me and give me hugs good night. ¡°¡®Brats¡¯ your face!¡± one of them shouts and I wonder if they really did learn that phrase from me. ¡°We¡¯re older than you!¡± ¡°We were only in the shop for 10 years. We died over 70 years ago,¡± the other one brags, smirking and sassy. -Oh, this attitude is fine now, but you were going to rip my antenna off earlier?- Fack, I am a bad influence. Well, they already admitted they¡¯re not kids, so I can¡¯t be held responsible. -Fuck off and let me sleep. Talk to Aunty if you need anything. I think all that¡¯s left are good people.- [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique II] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Ghost Pot (+120/-0)] [3 x218 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x0 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +734530/-435309] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408429] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97633717/107275977] I yawn. -Oh, fuck off,- I groan, closing my eyes, rolling over, and nodding off. Spoiled VI Chapter Nine I wake up to the girls sitting on either side of me drumming on my back while singing some bullshit about the gods sending a hero to a village. The village ¡°hero¡± gets rewarded and recognized by the Empire, receiving a token of favor from the sitting Empress. For the finale they throw their hands up, -- jazz-hands! -- and sing my name. -The gods given hero is named ¡°Sandy¡±?- I drone, waiting for them to go away so I can go back to sleep. -Good thing that¡¯s not my name.- Cue pouting shoving match. Apparently singing about a world-saving Cataclysm preventing a cataclysm is in poor taste. More shoving as they disagree that singing about preventing cataclysms is in poor taste. Apparently I don¡¯t count. Good to know. -Why aren¡¯t you letting me sleep...?- ¡°Aunty wants to talk to you,¡± one girl huffs, crossing her arms. ¡°Little Corpse was too afraid to pester you.¡± ¡°You shouldn¡¯t try to eat him, you know.¡± What? No. Instead of asking more pointless questions or being goaded into asking more pointless questions, I just blitz out and try to get whatever this is over with. Aunty meets me in the temple of me, cursing me with her eyebrows until we¡¯re outside, and then the real tongue-lashing begins. Rude to monks, check. Rude to Aunty, check. Ungrateful, mmhmm. Blind. -ingly bright. Got ¡®em! She reaches out, grabs a pinch of skin, -- um, -- and twists. ¡°Ow!¡± I grab my arm, feelings and flesh hurting. She stares at me blankly, hand snaking out quick as shiz, and now I¡¯m being dragged by my ear. ¡°Why do I have ears!¡± Hunans have way too many handholds, but I don¡¯t get picked up. Ugh. She lets my ear go, slinging me lightly to a table. Now I¡¯m sitting, rubbing my arm and ear, and Aunty is glaring at me from over the tiny table that is clearly not meant to hold food. She snaps her fingers, a small side table set up with snacks, a small tea service, and the accounting book. She slams the book open, spins it around the tea, somehow keeping the book on the table despite it hanging mostly off the edge, not bunching up the decorative table cover, or interrupting the tea being served. ¡°Note 200 Regard for every surviving adult villager with 25 surviving adults, 500 per child at 5 children,¡± she stares at me while telling me this why? I guess she¡¯s pointing out the information in the book, ¡®cause her finger is resting on the lines as she goes. ¡°Out of 20 monks, all expected to perish during the night, you managed to save 15.¡± Are raised eyebrows and long pauses good or...? ¡°That¡¯s 1000 for every surviving monk. ¡°At 500 per ghost soldier, you took out 180 soldiers, castrating 9 corpse manipulators, defeating 10 when one surrendered after seeing you dismiss ghost flame before you could take away their army.¡± More eyebrows. Is this a drinking game? Or an eating game... Eyebrows equal cake... Maybe two... ¡°For Purifying the village you get ten-thousand for each of your four Purifications.¡± Eyebrows. ¡°Now,¡± she sits back crossing her legs off to the side, leaning back, and just watching me. One eyebrow raised, -- so that¡¯s what one cake looks like, -- but the book is still on my side. ¡°There¡¯s a bonus. If you complete 3 Objectives they will double your reward,¡± she says, holding out all five fingers. Is this a test? ¡°Unfortunately...¡± she uncrosses her legs, swinging them back under the table before resting her elbow on the edge of the table, right next to her tea. ¡°There¡¯s a limit. ¡°You earned over three-hundred-thousand regard. 325,000 to be exact.¡± She finally picks up her tea, holding it in both hands and taking a slow, shallow sip. Did she just dip her lips in the tea? Did they catch on fire? ¡°But the maximum Regard you can earn is 200,000, so that is what you got.¡± ¡°Oh, what? Boo!¡± That part I understand! I earned a lot of stuff and they didn¡¯t want to pay me, so they gave me less. ¡°Or are you saying that¡¯s how I got the Imperial Regard token? Which is what?¡± I can pay attention! Eyebrows! ¡°A badge with the forbidden symbol of the Golden Empress. A maiden cradling a star with the Sun behind her. A one-time use so it¡¯s made of ivory, not jade or gold or anything more valuabe.¡± She sighs, setting down her cup and crossing her arms and legs. ¡°The Token is for Purifying the village and preventing the awakening of a catastrophe,¡± Aunty says, requesting more snacks with a raised finger. Oh, crazy, where¡¯d those go...? ¡°So I did a good job and got a partial reward?¡± I reiterate, immediately tucking into the new treats. Lowered eyebrows count. ¡°Are you happy or angry?¡± ¡°You did well, gained face with the monks, and earned the Imperial Regard. I just worry,¡± she says quietly. ¡°Big powerful people noticing me. Very scary,¡± I frown. Do frowns count for snacks? Doesn¡¯t feel like it. ¡°Do you know how much it costs to maintain Fuck Face?¡± she asks after taking a sip, speaking before setting down her cup. Is emphasis equal snack? Pretty sure she¡¯s freeing that hand to hit me... ¡°A lot because his spirit is weak?¡± I didn¡¯t check because I don¡¯t care outside of having something to complain about. ¡°It costs as much to maintain him in this new body as it did to let him build his own. You need a new servant,¡± Aunty says with all the finality of a matriarch laying down the law in her house. In my house. ¡°It is merely a suggestion,¡± she says, flicking her wrist to let me know she¡¯s washing her hands of my nonsense. I doubt it. That¡¯s probably worth a snack, though. ¡°So back to the village for more looting, dump off more crap that I don¡¯t use, see if I can¡¯t get more poison greens and free coal, then to the monks for the library,¡± I stand up and stretch. That was productive. ¡°Does anyone know how to make pearls? And how is the locking information thing going? I really don¡¯t want anyone accessing my logs to find out how the girls were created.¡± ¡°We¡¯ve no doubt that the one who made them did it for face with the Sect, but we¡¯ll do our best to obfuscate the details,¡± Aunty gives another dismissive flick. She¡¯s told me all she wanted to tell me, and she¡¯s done talking I guess. ¡°I¡¯ll go out with the girl¡¯s to see how the monks are faring. So this was a quest or an event?¡± ¡°A lifelong bounty in all parts of the kingdom. If anyone had managed to prevent the catastrophe at Eager Hearts they would have been rewarded similarly,¡± Aunty shrugs, keeping her head turned so that I¡¯m out of her sight. ¡°Considering people probably caused the catastrophe at --.¡± ¡°People¡± were trying to cause the catastrophe here, too. ¡°Nevermind.¡± I wake up, stretch, get dressed and move the girls out of the house, so I can clear my room. When I move outside the house I don¡¯t see them, but I hear them behind me. I see that they¡¯d stormed back in after I¡¯d put them outside. I shrug. They can be offended all they want. I wasn¡¯t kicking them out of the house, I was telling them to wait for me. -Fuck Face, we¡¯re heading out,- I announce loudly, the girls groaning, and demanding a traveling letter. -The fack is a --.- Silent Howl: This. They want you to form a party for group communications. Some people enchant rings or nibs to pass secret messages. You can do this. Um... Party? The window opens and I see that there are people who can see the chat but not write in it. And I don¡¯t know who these people are or how they got this access. -These are mostly the people who stayed behind. Not all of them are friendly, and not all of them are in your Ghost Pot,- one of the girls informs me, peering over my shoulder like she can read the list, and it occurs to me that they might be doing just that. Cultivating is some magic bullshit. -Wait, I¡¯ve got unwilling souls I haven¡¯t sent off yet?- But I sent off so many before I left. How many people were trapped in me? -Tch! You know that there were nearly thousands in Eager Hearts alone!- one of the girls admonishes me, crossing her arms and frowning in disapproval. Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. -I thought it was Eager Heart?- I retort. Got ¡®em! -*Eager Heart was the way station. Eager Hearts was your void space!*- she snaps back. Ooh~. And ¡°oh¡±. -You guys know I don¡¯t know names.- This is dangerous. Silent Howl: Start with Fuck Face, Sweet Pea Blossom and Chrysanthemum Petal. That doesn¡¯t sound like a bad idea. I follow instructions. Silent Howl suggests I upgrade party permissions so I¡¯ve got co-captains who can handle trades and loot. Silent Howl: You¡¯ll be able to check in your logs. Was that supposed to be reassuring? Like I want to read that shiz. And I know they all know I don¡¯t. So co-captains that can make Deposits, not Withdrawals, can¡¯t edit my Logs or add entries. You assholes can make notes, not update my Logs. No adding new people, but you can kick some of these looky-loos. Fuck Face knows people from before he was cool, so he knows them best. Sweet Pea Blossom and Chrysanthemum Petal: We talk to people, too! -You talk to kiss-asses who want special favors or are too scared to tell you to fuck off.- Inner thoughts out. -Dare you to tell me I¡¯m wrong.- Not sure why the girls, grown women who failed puberty, -- ow. One of them pushed me, so I go with it, and now I¡¯m just lying on the ground, -- are getting Fuck Face to chastise me. Especially considering they were team ¡°Fuck Fuck Face¡±, like, yesterday. ¡°Little Corpse!¡± one of the girls stomps her foot, fists on her hips. -Oh! You gave Fuck Face a nickname. ¡°Little¡± Corpse because you two are so old. Ow.- I snort, trying not to laugh. They literally sat me back up so they could shove me back down. We¡¯re on some petty shiz here at Inner Void Productions. So it¡¯s true that pets resemble their owners. They grab my legs, one girl on each leg, and slowly drag me a few feet, shuffling their little feet quickly, but not covering much distance. A principle punishment versus actually trying to deal damage. -At least I don¡¯t mean it,- I point out as they take turns collecting leaves to drop on me, ¡°burying¡± me alive. -Lemme know when you guys are done with the peeper list so I can take us back out. I¡¯m gonna go back to the Library and find out more about ghost servant maintenance.- ¡°Bank bugs are so greedy,¡± the girls sigh, ¡°Little Corpse¡± bringing them sitting cushions. -Don¡¯t remember making those, but they look very nice.- I frown at the large cushions with their flower patterns with a built in wicker base to keep them off the ground. -Those look well crafted.- ¡°My spirit is broken, not weak. When haven¡¯t I taken advantage of the Inner Void?¡± Little Corpse says, kneeling on the ground instead of getting his own cushion. -You are very useful, and I do enjoy having someone to talk to who wasn¡¯t raised as a cultivator. Good job on being you,- I give him a thumbs up. ¡°Little Corpse is quite useful, and we were wrong about him. Not all Broken Servants. Just this one,¡± the girls say, making very minute adjustments to the way their robes lay across the cushions. -Excellent cop out,- I say, clapping idly. I¡¯m supposed to be reading up on the corpse preservation and ghost servants things, but I can¡¯t muster up the will to start. ¡°Eat something so you can focus,¡± Little Corpse snaps, entirely over my bullshit. Oh. Right. Food on the inside doesn¡¯t count. I give him a thumbs up and spawn a plate of dumplings next to me. I don¡¯t bother using chopsticks or sitting up, using my hand to feel for the plate while looking down on myself from above. It¡¯s reversed and I¡¯m uncoordinated, but I¡¯ll get there eventually. ¡°Lazy bank bug,¡± the girls wander over, grab one arm and one leg, both limbs on the same side, and then drag me over to their cushions. They go back for what is now a tray of dumplings, the plate was too much work for little reward, sit back down, and then use chopsticks to feed me. -Thank you,- I say as I lie in the dirt chewing a mouthful of dumpling. They just dropped one right in. Convenient. Not sure if they¡¯re taking turns purging the list or if that¡¯s all Fuck Face. ¡°They¡¯re feeding you and talking to Aunty about hunan foods you can make,¡± Fuck Face says, always responsive, always on the ball. A man of many talents. ¡°Aunty needs us to head out. The monks are about to be attacked. One of the Disciples used a Ghost Whistle.¡± The fuck is a ¡°Ghost Whistle¡±? I get up, not bothering to dust off, and then we¡¯re all walking through the village square while the monks circle facing out. -What --?- [Soul Poison] [-100 HP] [30 -Resentment] [-50 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-435339] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,375] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408416] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97633667/107275977] Something burrows into my side. And it burns. Fucking Ghost weapons! I look down but don¡¯t see anything. I get to watch as another quill flies from outside of my vision to bury itself in my side. Along with another and another. A neat little cluster. [Soul Poison] [-100 x5 HP] [30 x5 -Resentment] [-50 x5 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-435489] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,975] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408354] [Current Qi: 1905495/957945100] [Current Karma: 97633417/107275977] The girls scream, hair drifting up as they rise in the air, censers out, and then they swirl around each other, somehow alternating bracing and kicking off as they spiral towards a large storage warehouse on the edge of town. I¡¯m being sniped? Disciples aren¡¯t supposed to fight each other my ass. Little Corpse manages to snag the back of my robes, tucking his hand into my collar, but I just drag him with me as I up and away to pickup this bullshit delivery order. I get to see as someone looks out at them, peaces out, but leaves behind a marker. The girls don¡¯t move through it, milling about the room as other people disappear and leave behind their own personal markers. I bank all of them, except the one the first guy noped out of, and they grab onto me as I dive at it. I follow the glowing dots, annoyed as I wait for them to pulse in sequence to find out where this fucktard is going. I don¡¯t know if they¡¯ll all be there, but this guy¡¯s not getting away. ¡°There¡¯s a limit to its range, but it could track where my Flying Needles came from, so we should probably build up a network to harry it from multiple directions,¡± she says, marching into the room without a care, dressed like she¡¯s cosplaying a ninja. Sleeveless tunic top, off-black scarf not matching her black top or loose black pants, her black shoes woven reed bottoms with black socks with her big toe split to flex in its own separate stocking. [Soul Poison] [-100 x4 HP] [30 x5 -Resentment] [-50 x4 Karma] [Entomb Successful] [-100 Qi] [-10 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-435729] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408251] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97633007/107275977] I coat the cave walls, -- I know this stone. We¡¯re literally somewhere in the Sect grounds, -- in silk. The encased area is mine, and I set the rules. Welcome to my house. -No one leaves until I stop hurting,- I say, golden meteors sprouting from behind me, wrapping the bastard, and bringing her to me. I don¡¯t bother doing the soul suck, I think the girls can snag her if she makes a break, and souls I collect don¡¯t automatically go into my Pot unless they want to, which is bullshit. But I do start chewing on her face. The girls remove their chains, coming from behind me, Little Corpse standing up and easily looking over my head as I keep gnawing. Da fuq is she made of? Why am I making no headway? I¡¯m barely through her skin, I haven¡¯t even started on her muscle, she can¡¯t pull free with my fingers embedded in her skull, and she¡¯s not putting up a fight, just screaming. Why. Can¡¯t. I. Eat her?! [Soul Poison] [-100 x4 HP] [30 x4 -Resentment] [-50 x4 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-435969] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,975] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408151] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97632607/107275977] The girls easily disarm anyone who pulls out a weapon until they all stop trying. They idly walk around the room, kicking over markers with upturned noses and clear expressions, a studied disinterest, before depositing them into my bank. Little Corpse pulls out one of the ¡°flying needles¡±, stores it, but not in my bank, and then walks away. I suppose he does need to learn how to cultivate Resentment if he¡¯s going to be maintaining and recharging himself. Spoiled VI Chapter Ten Okay, this is just embarrassing. I whine as the girls start circling me, scrutinizing my technique. I know how to eat people! I might not have been doing it for as long as they have, but it¡¯s usually not this hard. I¡¯ve got lots of recipes and lots of souls that prove I know what I¡¯m doing. Why the fuck isn¡¯t this working?! [Soul Poison] [-100 x4 HP] [30 x4 -Resentment] [-50 x4 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-435969] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,975] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408151] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97632607/107275977] Hopefully I get used to this bullshit soon. I don¡¯t get poisoned, I am the poison! ¡°Oh!¡± One of the girls darts forward, snatching a red wood pendant that was hanging from under Discount Ninja¡¯s scarf turned face mask. Suddenly there¡¯s a double of Discount Ninja the same color as the pendant that one of the girls is holding up, even though she¡¯s paying more attention to the expression of pain and fear on the half eaten face than the item in her hand. The substitute landed on its back, so the rictus of death is super visible. Weird. And I bite into Discount Ninja¡¯s head like a giant apple. Egg. There¡¯s a gooey center after a hard shell, so definitely egg. [Soul Poison] [-100 x4 HP] [30 x4 -Resentment] [-50 x4 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-436209] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,578,945] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408051] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97632207/107275977] Sweet smoked pork. I guess with fat? ¡°It was a life-saving treasure!¡± the girl without the pendant jumps, clapping her hands together on landing, knees bent to absorb the impact like she can¡¯t fly. Or is it just a common pose? ¡°You stopped it from working!¡± That¡¯s handy. I keep chewing, trying to figure out why Discount Ninja tastes like sweet glazed barbecue pork. Definitely a good flavor, very rich, but why? ¡°Try this!¡± the girls jump in place and clap, the life saving treasure at their feet. Little Corpse walks around me, grabbing the arm just above the rest, and snapping the hand off with a quick squeeze and a push of his thumb. I keep a grip on my barbecued pork, holding it up by the neck, my thumb pressing into the flesh under the jaw as I reach out and break off a finger of the apparently carved wood treasure. Tastes like chocolate and puffed sweet rice. And there¡¯s crunchy bits? I take another bite, trying to identify where the texture changes before looking closely. -There¡¯s nails!- There are literally nails embedded in the wood. How¡¯d they get those in there? -Okay, so the nails are the crunchy sweet rice parts,- I explain, pulling one loose with my teeth. -It¡¯s like a giant molded candy.- Feels like a trap. Little Corpse shoves his hand into the center of the statues chest, reaching in to get a grip, then splitting it in half. It¡¯s got metal spheres embedded down the center, but other than that, it¡¯s solid. -Sweet! Not a trap! I hate when they have hollow centers,- I explain. So disappointing. -Thank you! I was too afraid to look. The disappointment hurts sometimes...- He deposits the broken treasure, the girls make sad faces until I point out that I don¡¯t wear jewellery, keeping the disc of choco goodness, and then I turn back to my barbecue long pig. That was a good idea. I reach down and pull off a finger, nibbling it like a chicken wing, pulling the flesh from the bone. The scarily smokey flesh. Why is the flavor so intense? It¡¯s like something not the coal, caught fire and burned, and instead of tasting like ash the flesh tastes like smoke and meat, not smoked meat. I finish the meat then crunch on the bone. The bone tastes like honey. Like honey candy when it crunches. So the crunchy honey and super smokey meat gives sweet smoked pork? I still don¡¯t hate it. [Soul Poison] [-100 x4 HP] [30 x4 -Resentment] [-50 x4 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-436209] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,365] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24408051] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97632207/107275977] -*Tch! Will this ever stop?!- I ask before biting into the head again. -I don¡¯t like the texture of the brains. I can¡¯t even figure out if I like the taste because the texture is so distracting!*- Little Corpse swings, his sickle taking the head clear off, and then he deposits it, stepping back and letting me eat. So fucking handy. He just gets me. -You guys want chairs?- I ask my little helpers. ¡°The cushions,¡± Little Corpse requests, and then he¡¯s holding the two outdoor cushions for the girls. -What do you want?- He deserves something for his service. ¡°I¡¯ll just read while you eat,¡± he waves me off, sitting down in a corner. He pulls out a small table, a tea set, and a manual, looking for all the world like he¡¯s just enjoying a good book in corpse makeup. ¡°Just keep eating.¡± I shrug, withdrawing a table for the girls. I give Little Corpse permission to Request food, glaring at him and hoping he understands its for personal use. We¡¯re not trying to feed the world here. The girls get little plates of candied hawthorn and bitter jelly along with unsweetened tea. Tch! That ice cream must¡¯ve blown their minds! ¡°No sugar added,¡± Little Corpse says, drawing a look of wide-eyed gaping mouth horror from me. ¡°They don¡¯t have a sweet tooth.¡± Blasphemy! Old biddies hiding in young bodies! Ow! [Soul Poison] [-100 x4 HP] [30 x4 -Resentment] [-50 x4 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734530/-438729] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,352] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831140/24407001] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97628007/107275977] ¡°Give me some Qi. Regular. I need to test something.¡± I look up to see Little Corpse looming over me while I¡¯m drumming on the exposed ribs, slurping up smoked bacon flavored innards, idly humming while the girls play hand games that involve the winner lightly slapping the loser, and the loser doing some truly comic book style expressions in response. -Are you trying to cycle Qi? You should learn how to cycle essence. I did the steps backwards,- I point out. When the fuck did I become so knowledgeable. ¡°How am I supposed to get essence?¡± Little Corpse shuffles, rolling his head and staring down at me in annoyance. -It¡¯s literally everywhere. The world would be dead without it. And there¡¯s probably a fuck ton of death essence from all this ghost bullshit the Sect does. Learn how to find it. Cycle it. You make Qi once you can condense it,- I tell him. Where the fuck am I pulling all of this good advice from. -I made you a quality body. Use it.- I turn from him to the girls, still chewing up my meat noodle. -Teach him how to cycle essence.- -*It¡¯s Qi then Essence! Essence to Qi is what you did, you backwards vault bug!*- one of the girls exclaims indignantly while the other waves for Little Corpse to join her in moving his shit over to where they¡¯re sitting. -I knew I did it backwards, I just don¡¯t remember how,- I remind them, trying to remember where I left off in my song. -First off, cycle your inner Qi before trying to grab any outside Essence! Purify it! The more you refine it, the better it¡¯ll be later on.- If you find this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the infringement. - ? ... highway... ? Ah!- I remember where I left off and continue ¡°playing¡± the song while humming lightly. I finally finish the corpse, dusting my hands off as I chew the last pinky toe. I chug some tea that¡¯s been steeping in my void, sniffing idly and glaring at the smell of waste. Yeah, I took my time enjoying my food, and I probably could have taken longer if I really maximized the value of the corpse, what with turning it into soups, sides, and dumplings instead of just eating it raw, but that¡¯s not what this was about. They hurt me, so they¡¯d have to make sure I got better. -Who¡¯s next?- I ask, putting it to a vote. ¡°You finished healing before you got to your ¡®noodles¡¯,¡± Little Corpse intones, keeping his back straight, legs crisscross as he sits on the ground meditating. [Name: Kisandera, ¡°Sandy¡±, Eclipsed Rainbow] [Affiliation(s): Thousand Valleys, Seven Moons, Companion of the Sacred Phoenix Sovereign, Inner Void Productions, Wimble Sunrise, Scarlet Silk Society, Hunter¡¯s Association, Vengeful Ghost Flame Sect] [Race: Celestial Void Moth Queen[Shattered] (Saint)] ?? [Current Form: Hunan] [Current Realm: Shimmering(Tier 5)] [Current Karma: 97628207/107275977] [Master: Shimmering Steel] [Familiar: Fuck Face (Ghostly Servant)] [Contracts: Sweet Pea Blossom and Chrysanthemum Petal, , , , ] [Max Will: 9579451] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734630/-438829] [HP: 9579451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831141/24407051] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,697R,179Da,258De,2605k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10679St] What the fuck? I clean up while glaring at my Status screen. -Oy! How do I hide Familiar and Contracts? Wait. No. Who all can see my Status?- -Anyone strong enough,- one of the girls says, blinking to look at me like I asked a stupid question. I don¡¯t know what the basics for hunans is! I see lots of shit! -*Well we can see your name and health and will, but we think your information is for you as a bank, not as a fighter, because you¡¯re very weak willed in a fight,*- one of them clarifies, and at least now I know that that¡¯s weird to them, too. -And you have a lot of stuff still in chests and bags, regular storage that you don¡¯t bother with,- the other girl says, and I wonder how much of my bank they can see. -We can¡¯t. Little Corpse told us.- I was wondering why they had so much leeway when they¡¯re under contract instead of just ¡°my shit¡±. Little Corpse is smooth with his assistance. See? We broken servants are very useful. Let the world look at us and tell us we¡¯re not! How many times have we proven them wrong? ¡°Someone sounded a Ghost Whistle,¡± Little Corpse says before climbing to his feet. ¡°What¡¯s a Ghost Whistle?¡± I ask the group cowering in one corner because they already pissed and shat in the other. And get wide-eyed, slack-jawed looks in return. ¡°You --,¡± one of them starts, flinching and shutting up as the disciples exchange looks. ¡°Watches as all of the food in the pantry exchanges looks,¡± I say out loud. Do I really have to remind them that I¡¯ll eat them? I took hours picking apart and eating the other one. They know! They watched me! ¡°But you¡¯re a spirit,¡± one of them snaps, the others flinching. ¡°How do you not know what a Ghost Whistle is?!¡± ¡°I¡¯m a spirit beast,¡± I frown. They think I¡¯m a ghost. ¡°Ghosts didn¡¯t bother me before I met you assholes.¡± ¡°They did, you just didn¡¯t notice. Hunan Resentments don¡¯t pertain to spirit beasts,¡± Little Corpse says with a stretch. He gives a wave and I reabsorb my silk, but get nothing for how expensive it is to make. ¡°You¡¯re being punished for failing as a producer.¡± ¡°I produce tons of stuff!¡± I shout as I transfer us to the village. Those fuckers can sit and spin on their ¡°Ghost Whistle¡±! Who¡¯s been lying on me?! Let them do an audit! ¡°Producing things as in making and selling. You make and use. If it¡¯s not cycling out in the world it doesn¡¯t count. You gained your power by being a producer, then you stopped producing. See how the gods punish you!¡± the girls say, one of them stopping to stand with her feet shoulder width apart, pointing at me with her other fist on her hip. The other just scrunches up her face in a frowning glare. ¡°How are they punishing me?¡± I¡¯m not losing that much karma, am I? And I¡¯m not being charged for my robes. ¡°Tch! You don¡¯t check Essence cost,¡± dramatic stance says, rolling her head and turning her back on me as she keeps walking. ¡°You were rewarded very handsomely for spinning. Now you¡¯re charged a life for the attempt!¡± the quiet girl says dramatically, eyes widening as she makes a snatching motion. Are there theatres? These bishes miss the theatre, don¡¯t they? ¡°¡®Charged a life¡¯?¡± How much is Entomb? Entomb Condensed Qi | 0 Qi | -100 Karma | -10 I stare blankly, trying to figure out how that¡¯s the value of a life. And I can¡¯t. I take a breath to ask and all three of them groan. ¡°What?!¡± Silent Howl: 100 Qi is more than the average Commoner has in their entire being back where you were found. And 100 Karma can release you from the cycle between this life and the next. And a Ghost Whistle is used to rile up the dead. Think of it as Soul Poison, not the drink, to Spirits that don¡¯t have flesh. That doesn¡¯t make sense. Why did the others think the spirits would come after me if they blew a Ghost Whistle? Wouldn¡¯t the spirits go after them? -The ghosts inside you,- one of the girls says and I realize that everyone is looking at me with hollow expression, looking haunted AF. ¡°Oh!¡± That would be bad. ¡°You¡¯re back!¡± I look up to see a monk running with a large pole in one hand, just pointing up to the sky as they sprint at me while frowning. Tch. What am I getting blamed for now? ¡°These bastards won¡¯t let up!¡± another monk says as they run up. They keep finding ways to stir up the old Resentments, and we can¡¯t find them to stop them!¡± ¡°They¡¯re making their move,¡± Little Corpse says as a corpse soldier runs into the middle of town before collapsing into a marker. ¡°That can¡¯t be --,¡± I don¡¯t get to make any dramatic proclamations as a Disciple appears next to the marker mid sneeze. ¡°Vengeful Ghost Disciple,¡± one girl says. ¡°He used a Ghost Whistle,¡± Little Corpse says before the disciple stands up. ¡°He¡¯s not a Corpse Manipulator,¡± says the other. ¡°He¡¯s weak,¡± the first girl¡¯s lip curls in distaste. Did he just try to flex with a cheap shot and a dramatic entrance? The girls are just tearing into him. Guess they¡¯re not happy either. ¡°We¡¯re here for the Catastrophe!¡± he bellows into the still air. He¡¯s smirking now, but let¡¯s see his expression when he sees the monks. -¡°We¡± who?- I snap. He looks around, does a quick spin, and I think he got sent off on his own. ¡°Doesn¡¯t matter!¡± he shouts loudly, really straining and giving those lungs a workout. ¡°My servant against your servant! If you win? We¡¯ll stop trying to Awaken the Resentments into a powerful Spirit. If we win? You fuck off!¡± Where¡¯s Widow¡¯s Sigh to tell this dude to fuck off? No? Just me? -Sure?- If he takes out Little Corpse, I¡¯ll just make him a new body. ¡°No cheating!¡± he shrieks, still red faced. He stumbles and I realize he really is screaming himself light-headed. -Says the bish who ran in throwing cheap shots,- I snort as Little Corpse walks around me, sickle at the ready. ¡°Shut up!¡± he screeches while holding up a script paper. When he rips it in half there¡¯s smoke and a ghost servant of the conscious zombie variety stands up from a half crouch. ¡°Bring out your servant and watch it get destroyed!¡± -Yo!- I say leaning around Little Corpse to point up at him. -He¡¯s been out. You¡¯re the one stalling. See if I don¡¯t track you down later. Have a light dinner.- His stunned expression would be hilarious if the girls didn¡¯t take turns making faces at each other all day. Bug-eyed, bent over like he got punched in the gut, lips pursed. Still pretty funny, I guess. Fuck Face, err, Little Corpse strides forward as the other zombie shuffles forward like a broken servant, -- not with eyes like that, -- and I wait for it to juke and make a run at me. Instead Fuck, err, Little Corpse just swipes with his scythe when he¡¯s in range, beheading the now spewing ¡°zombie¡±. Little Corpse picks up the head, banking the stone marker with his back facing the Disciple, -- bish is smooth. Fuck! His sleight of hand is on another level. Crap. I don¡¯t wanna check my Logs to see what else he¡¯s gotten away with, -- carries it to the girls, and kneels while presenting it. They lean forward, a wisp of fog emerging from between the lips before they exhale into one of their little soul purses, the fog dipping into the bag. With what feels like way too much ceremony the girls turn to face me, walking in lock step side by side, heel toeing over before presenting their little pouches. And nothing happens. I try to look in, but I can see the bags of Resentment Stones are open, and just sitting in dry ice fog. -I can¡¯t take the spirits with the Stones in the way,- I flail at them. Tch! And they probably need spending money, not just snacks. [-100 x2 Spirit Stones] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10679 -200St] [Ghost Pot: +120/-0] [Resentment: +734630/-441229] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831141/24406051] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97624207/107275977] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,697R,179Da,258De,2605k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10479St] -Separate the pouches. Hide them separately so this doesn¡¯t happen again!- I watch as the girls take out their snack and money purses, tucking them into their belts instead of their sleeves, and offer me the pouches again. [Gift] [3 -Ghost] [30 -Resentment] [3 Con. Qi] [-30 Karma] [Ghost Pot: +120/-3] [Resentment: +734630/-441259] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831144/24406044] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97624177/107275977] -Very handy! I¡¯m going to need you three to clear out the Inner Void, so we can send the Unwilling Squatters who aren¡¯t contributing away,- I nod to myself, stroking my chin before Little Corpse reaches over and starts banking the Shards that are just sitting in me. -Lemme try one of those,- I ask and he holds the last one up before I even finish speaking. -Good man.- Now that they¡¯re not deadly they just taste like fried dough. They¡¯re not as crumbly as I thought they¡¯d be. Or crunchy. They¡¯re actually kinda chewy, but I don¡¯t know if that¡¯s becasue they were sitting in me so long. Not salty or sweet. Just chewy fried dough. -I guess this is one of those things that needs dip,- I shrug before turning to the other cultivator who has been subtly moving around trying to find his marker without being super obvious about it. -You guys forgot I grabbed the girls for insurance, didn¡¯t you?- He screams, the girls scream, and then his arms are draped over their shoulders, his head lowered while they giggle, and all of my ¡°Get the FUCK out of here!¡± alarms are going off. Spoiled VI Chapter Eleven ¡°Little Corpse¡±: Yeah, they¡¯re eating him. Neat. He got his nickname as his Party Tag. -We¡¯ll be back in a few hours to see if any of what he said was real or not,- I tell one of the monks. -The Ghost Servant was actually a Disciple dressed like a corpse, the Disciple wasn¡¯t a corpse manipulator, and tried to run, and I think the girls are eating him, so that¡¯s that taken care of...- I purse my lips as I try to remember if I missed anything. -Oh! Congratulations on winning your duel!- I clasp Little Corpse¡¯s shoulder as the girls stumble with their boyfriend meal. I don¡¯t know how his hair is staying on his bare skull, or how they ate around it like that, but it looks like they started as his face and then worked their way down to his chest. I¡¯m standing there, arms crossed over my chest, watching as they reach, through his robes, no damage to the fabric, pull out chunks of meat, and eat or feed one another. There¡¯s no blood on the robes. No blood on the exposed bone. The bones that are exposed look bleached. -You are very neat eaters,- I applaud, Little Corpse sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose with his head lowered. -What? You¡¯ve seen me eat! Look how clean his clothes are! Look how fast they¡¯re stripping his corpse!- ¡°I don¡¯t eat flesh. Living or otherwise,¡± Little Corpse says. The girls aren¡¯t offended, but I am. -How many of these villagers would like fish or beef or pork or chicken? Don¡¯t eat flesh... Hmph!- I cross my arms, putting him out of my sight while he shakes his head and walks away from me. ¡°Let¡¯s... put that away,¡± Little Corpse says, looking at the girls. ¡°We¡¯ll need to redo our room!¡± the girls cheer. I don¡¯t wanna, but I kinda have to know. -Be right back,- I say before transferring us to my void. To the house, everyone sweeping in, and now we¡¯re in the girls¡¯ room. ¡°What kind of room did you want?¡± Little Corpse asks. Didn¡¯t even occur to me. Kinda assumed they¡¯d cultivator bullshit some house renovations. ¡° ? Honeymoon chamber! ? ¡± the girls cheer, holding up the body with one hand, other fist raised in victory. -I¡¯m counting on you,- I turn to Little Corpse, clasping his shoulder and trying to keep a stern expression. ¡°I assumed you would,¡± he says, cutting his eyes, arms crossed as I update his permissions. -Build yourself some chambers while you¡¯re at it,- I pat his shoulder and leave the room. Imma take a nap! I wake up on my side, resting my head on my outstretched arm, on my porch. Did I not go into my room? I think I wanted to avoid being in a bed while the girls were on their ¡°honeymoon¡±. ¡°The room¡¯s finished. The elders want you to see it so that you know what to look for.¡± This feels like a trap. I sigh, get up, and follow Little Corpse into the house, and then down a hallway. ... Their common room is still a sitting area, but it looks like the main room got a glow up. Clean lines, polished stone, woven fabrics and lacquered wood. Not kids. Got it. The fact that they¡¯re fully robed, in bed, with the corpse, under the covers, and cheering when I come into the room is deeply upsetting. And there¡¯s so much red. Red banners, red runners, red sheets, red drapes on their raised four post bed, and they¡¯re wearing red robes. Large red robes, not traditional red form fitting tunics and split robes. None of what I¡¯m presented with matches what I have stashed in my Library as ¡°honeymoon¡± outside of the color. But I¡¯m seeing a lot of funeral shiz. We really need to hunt down anyone who was part of making these two. A corpse wedding. They¡¯re making corpse husbands. No sex, just payback and food, and they didn¡¯t get this from me, we just have similar thoughts. -How do you strip the flesh without the mess?- ¡°I¡¯m gonna keep rebuilding the village,¡± Little Corpse sighs, and I transfer them out of my void. He wanders off with the monks acknowledging him, but not attacking, because we¡¯re cool like that. The girls exchange a look, sitting up in bed, and not saying a word. -Seriously.- Did they think I was joking? I¡¯m not. -How do you do that?- ¡°We learned from experience,¡± one of the girls says slowly and I feel my scales lift in buggy goosebumps. Oh. -Imma go outside now.- I tell the girls, pointing back over my shoulder. -You leave your... snack? Boyfriend? Husband? Leave the body so we can go.- They flip back the sheet, just the corners so the corpse is still covered, and climb out of the bed, leaving the sheet folded down so they can climb back in quickly. They put their shoes on, stand at the ready, and then we head back out. And I¡¯ve got multiple messages from party chat, sends, and the peanut gallery, all telling me someone used a Ghost Whistle. ¡°They¡¯re still at it,¡± one monk wielding a rake says. ¡°We¡¯ll work on purifying,¡± the girls say, clasping hands and running off to stop the village from being fogged out again. Look at us. Demonic cultivators, corpses and non-hunans joining hands with monks to save people. No wonder my fellow Disciples hate me. Get fucced. I flip off my Sect fellows and come to my senses with a monk waiting patiently for me to stop daydreaming. -Hi.- The monk opens their mouth, I get tackled by a villager, transfer Little Corpse and the girls back to me, and we all get dumped back into the sect at the foot of Widow¡¯s Sigh. -If you¡¯re not talking about the way everyone keeps attacking me, and instead plan on chastising me for whooping their asses, you can send me back to the town now,- I tell him from my place on my back on the ground. ¡°You haven¡¯t reported anything,¡± he tells me and I go cross-eyed. -We¡¯ll find out how to do it,- the girls reassure me as I frown. -Tch! What the hells have you been listening to? Am I picking on people for no reason?- I snap wiggling around to indicate the spent corpse with its arms locked around me. ¡°Sorrow¡¯s Roost is a ton of slaughter where those who can¡¯t or won¡¯t live elsewhere go. Their living Resentments disturb those who died there, alone and weak. It is a prime cultivation area for anyone wishing to create a personal servant. It¡¯s a tradition to create a personal servant before you advance out of the Sect, and you are interfering with that tradition!¡± Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author. -You can advance out of Sects?- There¡¯s a collective sighing groan and the air resonates with the sound of many face palms. -How would I know?- I snap. -I¡¯m told I¡¯m a servant until death, they keep trying to use my corpse, and you can just leave?- ¡°Sects are there for people to become cultivators if their families don¡¯t have the resources to train and develope them,¡± a masked elder says, gesturing with small slow sweeps of his hands. ¡°Once you¡¯ve developed enough, advanced to the point where you can strike out on your own, you are free to make a name for yourself. We are not cults, contrary to what commoners may believe, but we will not allow our secrets to walk away.¡± -Is there someone who can teach me how to share my logs? There was a monk who was going to in order to share his findings about what happened at Green Rivers, but he died because of your stupid tradition!- I snap, sulking that I keep getting in trouble because I won¡¯t let some bastards pick on me. See how I punish them until I learn how to file reports! ¡°We could test you to see if you¡¯ve advanced enough to leave the hovels and move into the Sect grounds,¡± the kinder old man murmurs thoughtfully. -*¡±Move into the Sect grounds¡±? I thought these were the Sect grounds!*- ¡°Oh, no no no. We¡¯re not so poor as this. This is to encourage lower disciples to rank up quickly. You must think quite poorly of us,¡± the old man chuckles. -Yes!- I exclaim, getting annoyed and banking the body so I can sit up. -You¡¯ve got people in soiled clothing shitting in the corner of their bedroom, sleeping on filthy straw, and you think I¡¯ll consider you a rich sect?!- ¡°This is called ¡®The Hovels¡¯ for a reason,¡± the old man says, turning and waving for me to follow him. ¡°Come now! Let¡¯s test to see if you can advance in our Vengeful Ghost Sect!¡± -That¡¯s another thing!- I say as I follow the elder, Little Corpse smoothly stepping ahead of me with the girls keeping an eye on Widow¡¯s Sigh as he follows behind. -How many Ghost sister sects are there? Vengeful Ghost, Ghost Flame, Vengeful Ghost Flame!- ¡°Where there are living there are Resentments and corpses,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh gives a near imperceptible shrug. -People are assholes,- I say by way of agreement. ¡°You replaced the broken servant? That¡¯s a good start,¡± the elder ahead says, looking back and giving Little Corpse a once over. -No. Same servant. I made a body with a corpse preservation technique,- I shrug when our little procession slows to a stop. -I¡¯m not lacking resources, I¡¯m lacking knowledge, and people keep trying to hoard it.- ¡°You made this body for a Broken Servant with a Corpse Preservation technique you learned from this sect?¡± the elder ahead asks clearly. -Iono. It was just a Corpse Preservation Technique. With some modifications, because I can,- I give a bigger shrug, exaggerating and holding the motion while frowning with my eyes as open as I can get them. I¡¯m not sure how else to tell them I have no idea what the fack they want. -You wanna know if it¡¯s from this sect? Show me some Sect Corpse Preservation manuals and I¡¯ll look for the one I used.- ¡°Very clever,¡± he chuckles, wagging his finger at me as he turns back around and keeps the party moving. ¡°Very clever. ¡°When you¡¯ve demonstrated your ability you can pass freely between the areas below your current ranking,¡± the forward elder says as we head to the store. ¡°You¡¯ll gain access to more areas where you can practice your techniques--.¡± -Why was that guy in the Graveyards killing people allowed to get away with it?- I say as I remember being pissed off about Fashionista¡¯s bullshit in the Graveyards. -The one you gave my Resentment Stones to.- ¡°We were unaware that there was a problem in the Graveyards,¡± the elder says slowly, and I can hear the frown. -Surely someone saw that bastard¡¯s Chains of Heavens and Hells attack on me!- I snap. No way wouldn¡¯t these gossipy bishes not talk about seeing something that crazy. ¡°There were reports of Heart¡¯s Disarray using his Chains of Heavens and Hells, but he never reported a reason behind it,¡± the elder says coldly. Now the person leading our little group seems a lot less friendly and understanding. ¡°Let us get your tests out of the way, shall we?¡± Widow¡¯s sigh stops near a lantern, crossing his arms and waiting, the girls narrowing their eyes and frowning. When the elder ahead gets to the next lantern and slams his palm against it I¡¯m standing in a dusty stone room, but the stone looks natural, smooth and grey, not creepy crumbly. A quick look around and we¡¯re in a stone building with stone corpse boxes lining what might not be a room but a long hall. -It was a trap,- I sigh before waving them to check out the other boxes. -Lets find out what kinda loot boxes we¡¯ve got.- Little Corpse snorts as he takes one box, the girls going to another, and then we all open them at nearly the same time. A corpse servant sits up in my box, arms flailing, and I coldcock it in its masked face, not doing any damage, but it was still sitting up, so it flies back. From the girls there¡¯s a cheer as someone starts screaming in their box while Little Corpse just starts using his sickle to dismantle whatever was in his box. ¡°Oh, thank gods, you¡¯re just girls.¡± Excuse me? I sputter and turn to get a good non-Ultravision look at this dumbass who thinks the girls aren¡¯t a threat. It¡¯s just some guy in good robes, long sleeved over robes, under robes a different color, and then under clothes a different color besides that. Either he has a short over robe and a different lower robe or it¡¯s an elaborately colored and cut over robe belted to hide the change between its rich deep brown at the top and the golden brown at the bottom. He casually hauls himself up dusting himself off before seeing me. He points with a rolled up manual, shouting at me and telling me that the servant is his so I better not try anything when a snort from Little Corpse has him looking over before scurrying to put me between him and my servant. The dumbass hides behind me, literally reaching out to keep me from moving, honestly trying to use me as a meat-shield. ¡°Those girls are pretty strong, huh?¡± he asks, looking over my shoulders to steal looks at Little Corpse, ignoring me completely. -He¡¯s my servant,- I point out flatly, not at all amused that he¡¯s marked me as the weakest one and the one to bully. I can¡¯t fight, but I won¡¯t be bullied. ¡°Yeah, right,¡± he snorts, laughing before looking down to see that I¡¯m serious. ¡°Fine! Your servant against my servant. Loser gives up their servant to the winner!¡± -Why do you think your servant can beat mine?- I look over at Little Corpse, watching as he shakes his head but doesn¡¯t pay any attention to us. ¡°You don¡¯t have enough Resentment to keep that thing powered,¡± he scoffs, smacking my shoulder with a fan he¡¯s holding. I hadn¡¯t even noticed it. I think I thought he was reading a manual. I look down at the dusty prints he¡¯s left on my robes, -- was this fucker wiping his hands off on me? -- then back up to him. -Deal. Which one of your servants against which one of mine.- Catch the hint asshole. ¡°My box servant against all of your servants at once,¡± he snarks, bending down to mock me, eyes wide with a goofy grin before he stands up and swats me on the top of the head with his fan. ¡°Dumbass! If you can¡¯t control one soldier how are you going to control multiple servants?¡± -Who says I need to?- I ask quietly as the girls do their banshee bullshit, Little Corpse hefting his sickle while frowning, and storming over. Little Corpse walks up to the foot of the casket, reaching down and flipping it, the other servant apparently not juiced up enough to free itself. -I win, now get the fuck off of me!- I snap as Little Corpse comes over and starts dusting me off. ¡°You dare!¡± the girls shriek before spiraling over and back up with the man in their clutches. He doesn¡¯t make a sound, but I get to see his grimace, skin stretched taut over his face muscles, the whites of his eyes visible as he silently struggles before his face is hidden by the back of the girls¡¯ heads. -How do I know how many servants I can control?- I ask Little Corpse, stopping him from lifting up the corpse box. -You¡¯ll have to develop the skill to fuel multiple corpses at a time,- he shrugs. -You don¡¯t have that problem, but I¡¯m not sure how you being a bank bug affects your ability to manipulate Resentment.- -Bank bug and producer. Just because I don¡¯t any more doesn¡¯t mean I can¡¯t,- I remind him, wondering why he usually speaks out loud when he can send. -Wait, did you learn how to send?- -Just recently,- he acknowledges, head bowed as he scuffs his feet against the ground. -Do you want sandals or something?- I ask when I notice he¡¯s barefoot, but he¡¯s already shaking his head. -Shoes feel weird. I usually had old worn ones with holes in them or broken ties. This is more comfortable.- I grunt in acknowledgement then turn back to the girls who are finally back on the ground. Only half of the skull is stripped, but, judging from the look on the rest, he either died of fear or he¡¯s in shock. -And where are you going to store that?- Little Corpse chastises them, gesturing at the body, hands going to his hips. -You still have the other one you haven¡¯t finished. You¡¯re not going to be stacking bodies in bed!- -Bank it for later,- I wave his concern off. -Just make sure to mark it somehow so I know not to eat it.- -Fine,- Little Corpse sighs, running his hand over his head. -Let¡¯s wait here!- one of the girls says, clapping their hands together with a hop, the body put away for now. -There are plenty of spirits and we can move through the Gates to find out more information for you!- I turn from the hopeful expression that screams she¡¯s trying to trick me into accepting something that makes no sense to Little Corpse who stares, arms raised lightly, unmoving while trying hard not to move, why? -Why are you scared?- I ask him, because the girls better not be picking on him still. -He¡¯s not strong enough to go through the wards.- -We are.- -That¡¯s handy,- if it¡¯s true. I turn to Little Corpse, the girls cheering silently before disappearing. -You¡¯re in charge of communication. I want a nap but I should eat. Give me some things to study up on while I eat,- I say, waving to him while I make myself comfortable on the bottom of the flipped corpse box. Spoiled VI Chapter Twelve -Ah...- he turns slightly away, hands flipping from palms down to palms up as he shrugs. -Oh!- He perks up, eyes clear and bright, so I guess he figured something out. -You didn¡¯t learn corpse preservation from a manual, you made a manual in your library after getting several soldier corpses?- -Oh, yeah,- I nod and gesture for him to continue by waving my chopsticks at him. I finish the bite of fatty meat and take a bite of greens. -Continue,- I say before chewing this bite. He blows out a breath, looking away from me, eyes unfocused before he looks around. -Mind if I sit down?- he asks, pointing at the box he¡¯d dug through. -Go for it,- I wave him off. He puts the lid back on the box, then hops on top, sitting with his legs crossed, slumping as he thinks. -I take it there¡¯s a reason you brought that up?- -Oh! Right!- he shifts around, pauses then holds his hands up, arms resting on his thighs as he leans forward. -Every Corpse manipulator is given an idea of how to preserve a corpse, but they all have their own formula. There¡¯s some common ground, things that just work, but a full Corpse Preparation Manual would be very valuable. Especially of an advanced Corpse like the one you made for me,- he finishes, eyes shining brightly. -Don¡¯t tell them shit. Got it,- I nod, continuing to eat. -Why did that last idiot say I couldn¡¯t control you all at the same time? Am I supposed to be doing something?- -Mm!- He points at me, eyes wide, head back, back straight, and just holds the pose. -Most manipulators have to channel Resentment into their servants to keep them going if they¡¯re not just absorbing ambient Resentment, but you kinda gave me my own supply, and the girls are just good at gathering and feeding themselves. Cultivator things.- I grunt in acknowledgement, and just sit and eat for a little bit. Little Corpse drums his fingers on his legs before hopping off and going on to check the other boxes. When he finds a servant he puts the lid at an angle, trapping them in, but letting us see that they¡¯re there. It looks like all of the servants here are white-masked, but I don¡¯t know why they¡¯re so weak. -They¡¯re not weak, the caskets are warded,- Little Corpse says. -I think they¡¯re a potential reward or proof that you passed the trial.- -So I might need to take one of them to be able to leave...- Really need to find out if I have an extra servant slot yet. He¡¯s strong enough to ignore whatever wards these are. Good to know. Too bad I can¡¯t tell the difference between a ward an epitaph and a dirty limmerick. He snorts, and either he¡¯s going to be looking those up later or he already knows, and he¡¯s been doing some casual reading between study sessions. -Why wouldn¡¯t I?- he says, laughing lightly as he does inventory. -Reading for fun? You monster!- I snicker and he lets out a quick bark of laughter. I keep eating, taking my time to chew every single bite while Little Corpse makes sure to loot the caskets. Loot box occupied? Can¡¯t kill the spirits yet, so he pulls out the spirits in occupied caskets, carrying them by their throats to empty boxes he already checked, trapping them, then going back to the now empty box to continue smashing hidden panels, false bottoms, and pretty much wrecking the place to get me more shiz. I approve. Over half of the boxes are empty. Like already looted. Six pairs of boxes, six empty boxes. Boo...! Only four servants, not all of them white robed. Some have black tunics or black pants, and apparently not all of the masks are blank, but neither of us know what they indicate. The air whirls and screams in sync with Little Corpse finding that the walls aren¡¯t walls, but dusty web shrouded alcoves with even more boxes, but these are filled with desiccated bodies, rotten low level loot boxes, -- busted wood caskets equal wood scrap, -- and I sigh as I get ready to disarm the enemies where I can, leaving the actual fighting to Little Corpse. The whirlwind resolves into the girls spinning to the ground, covering their mouths, and racing over with eyes shining brightly. They¡¯re excited, weren¡¯t lying about being able to move around, and now there¡¯s something else I have to ask them about and hope it isn¡¯t linked to their death. Little corpse comes to join me on my over turned uncommon loot box, and we give the girls our attention. The Sect is pay to win. Literally. Whoever stores or generates the most Resentment is king. Or Emperor. Or Empress. There are actually women in the Sect. We¡¯re not supposed to fight one another, but a lot of people have gotten it into their heads that I¡¯m not a new Sect member, but some kind of auditor put in place to test them. Pop quiz, bishes! Someone comes in and disrupts your ritual. What do you do? The monks were going to kill themselves to try to stop the ritual, but I was taking all the power from the ritual every time it got near to critical. How dare. We, -- literally everyone who traded blows, including my attempts to defend myself. The girls filed reports and most people admitted that they tried to stop me from stopping them, ¡®cause that was the exercise, right? They honestly think I¡¯m indestructible. Oops? -- have to pay a fine. For every fight we pay 100 Resentment. A year¡¯s worth of effort to some people. For every death of a fellow disciple, 1,000 Resentment. Before I can snap that I¡¯ve already contributed and these bastards are trying to bleed me dry, the girls inform me that the Sect is pulling from the Shard I used to buy them. Check the accounts, and take it out of my deposit! Suck it! Although the fine doesn¡¯t apply to the elders. -Come again?- Did they say the elders are fighting? The elders aren¡¯t fighting, they¡¯re cleaning house. Resentment equals Rank, once you pass certain milestones of course, and a lot of powerful people have suddenly gone bankrupt, falling in the ranks and being replaced by... Not so powerful people. Which is an awful way to rank up. The Sect is about making people strong and sending them out into the world, fully capable of taking care of themselves, and some of the new Wankers, err, Rankers... Aren¡¯t. So the elders are giving them the same treatment as I tried to give Little Corpse. Get Gud or get recycled. So some of those people heard about the whole Sorrow¡¯s Roost thing, and figured passing my little test would be an excellent way to prove how amazing they are. -That¡¯s been cleared up, right?- I ask, not at all amused by this bullshit. I knew they were targeting me, but this is dumber than I thought it would be. -¡®Cause this shit isn¡¯t funny and survivor¡¯s will get their feelings hurt.- -They¡¯ve been told, but who¡¯s to say they¡¯ll believe it?- the girls shrug, one looking unfocused and disinterested while the other pouts lightly, possibly feeling sad on my behalf. -Oh!- unfocused focuses and dances while mopey beams. -Heart¡¯s Disarray was fined 2,000 Stones for using such a powerful attack on you! One for each time,- the little solar death beam says gently pointing once at each of my hands while she talks. Oh! Two attacks, 1,000 Stones each. -Spirit Stones or Resentment Stones?- I ask, realizing that there¡¯s a huge difference. Don¡¯t want people paying to at me. Again. Why does this keep happening? -Resentment Stones!- the other scowls, flicking her sleeve like she¡¯s bitch slapping away my question. It was a legitimate concern. -If you hadn¡¯t made your display so elaborate, he¡¯d be in the Hovels soon,- she continues, putting me out of her sight, ¡®cause how dare I dunk on the higher disciples? -Tch! That¡¯s not what I meant!- She stomps her foot as I look away to put her out of my sight. -Oh!- the Gentle runs to Angry and whispers something to her. I could Logs, but nah... -Oh!- Angry perks up, sucking her tongue and giving me a narrow look before her expression clears. -*Heart¡¯s Disarray has been found to be the cause of many budding Disciple¡¯s deaths! If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation. -He roams the Graveyards looking for rare corpses that sometimes form there, and if he runs across a Disciple that doesn¡¯t have a proper servant or the mark of wielding Ghost Flame, he ¡°culls¡± them for the Sect. Taking their Resentment as payment!- -What mark?- I ask, ¡®cause we¡¯ve already gone over, and lauded, Little Corpse¡¯s utility over and over again. -There¡¯s a skill, Toll the Dead, that lets you see scars on your spirit from manipulating or gaining the Resentment. I don¡¯t have it, but apparently you don¡¯t have any scars.- -I¡¯ve got tons! My soul isn¡¯t --.- Is my soul not hunan? Bish. What the fack am I thinking? If it was, someone would have noticed by now, and I wouldn¡¯t be a bug. Tch! -Well, I have a soul... It¡¯s just not hunan shaped... They probably don¡¯t know where to look for scars... Or care!- I add. I¡¯m pretty sure he was just killing people to try to form one of these rare spirits or corpses. -Remember that display you did with all of those Stones? The important ones?- the girl quickly amends, raising an eyebrow and giving a snarky little head shake. No... -Wait, how many people did he kill?- No way... Is it my birthday? When¡¯s my birthday. -*He¡¯s been kicked back to the Hovels anyway, and he has to pay a weekly fine of 10 Stones,*- she continues, fists on her hips and alternating bending her knees to give a somehow rude, and clean, little shimmy. ? Happy Birthday to me... ? -It might take him years to get out of debt enough to start advancing again,- the other girl says, getting started on a meal at a table that I¡¯m pretty sure Little Corpse set up, but when? -*And many of the old masters in the Sect are furious. You know how you were sponsored by Widow¡¯s Sigh?*- the other girl sits down to share in the meal. -No,- I say while shaking my head. He dumped me in the Graveyards by the Broken Servants, but he didn¡¯t actually give me anything. The Red Silk Spider thing was me helping them, not the other way around. Pretty sure they intended to use me as a scapegoat if anything happened. -Oh.- She literally stops eating and just sits there. She looks and sounds so disappointed. -Anywho!- the other girl waves her off, pausing in her meal to take up the explanation. -*Widow¡¯s Sigh dropped you off in the Graveyards, right? You didn¡¯t have to figure out the riddles and puzzles or rob graveyards on your way to find the Graveyards with a basic idea of how things work, but no power. The Graveyards are there for you to gain that power.*- -Right. He should have given you a manual with a breathing technique to help you start creating the necessary skill to gather servants, and a blueprint on how to create a Ghost Pot.- -You got the breathing manual but you didn¡¯t look at it until you got a few more from the Graveyards.- Little Corpse chimes in, going through the alcoves one column at a time, probably just to get used to his body, because he¡¯s putting in a lot of effort. Unless this is another he¡¯s too stupid thing. -If the girls want to join me they can take high or low, and you can search the low ones if you¡¯re so inclined.- How considerate. -Okay, what do you mean a ¡°blueprint¡± for the Ghost Pot?- I ask, pointing with my chopsticks before looking down and realizing I¡¯ve got a bowl of dumplings in my hand. I shrug and start eating while waiting for the explanation. -Our Ghost Pots!- the girls say, holding out their soul purses. -I¡¯m going to try to make a pill bottle design, but the purses are very popular,- Little Corpse admits, and I¡¯m very confused. -Yeah, you just did bank bug things, but most people can¡¯t do Spatial Storage internally without being very advanced.- I rest my hands on my thighs as I wait for my brain to realize that I facked up successfully at so many points. I got a Broken Servant when I have the resources to support them into being a badass --. -Are you still a Broken Servant or are you a Ghost Soldier now?- I quickly finish the dumplings because I want to eat ice cream while we talk. -And did you want anything? Or do you not eat, ¡®cause organs?- -Groundskeeper. Still a Spirit Servant, but I¡¯m advanced enough to maintain house grounds. Roam around without you needing to power me, and I can wield tools, and think and act without your input. And I can¡¯t eat ¡®cause organs.- he gives a sad smile, hanging by one hand to explore a middle alcove. -So, if I learn bodies better --.- I start, awkward as hells, because this feels awkward. He can¡¯t eat, and we¡¯re eaters! -If you learn bodies better, and I¡¯m comfortable enough being a living corpse, then maybe, but not now, thank you,- he says, interrupting me with his voice raised before ending softly. -So what would happen if I attempted to create bodies for these masked ghosts? Are they better spirits or just intact?- Subject change! Nailed it. -Depends on the spirit,- all three of them say at the same time. Fair. Food done, we start looting. Bodies at various levels of skeletonized? Banked, deposited, and moving on. Wood? Ditto. Dusty ass cobwebs that looked like dust filled murals... Banked. You never know? There¡¯s some not garbage though. Occasionally very good treasures, even. Gems, -- we¡¯re assuming some rich lords tried to buy their way through and died, -- manuals stolen from other sects and hidden here, -- we¡¯re not sure if this is a garbage dump or a bootlegger¡¯s stash, -- and then I remember that the test might be to get a masked Ghost Servant. There¡¯s a door we could use, but loot. -Did you find out how many servants I can have or how to tell?- I ask the girls. One of them just stops moving, her head bowing, chin to her chest, and the other groans dramatically while slowly folding and collapsing to the ground. -What¡¯d I say?!- -The rule of thumb is take how much Resentment you have, and divide that by 1000, and that¡¯s how many servants you can have,- the standing girl raises one hand, languidly looking at it before raising her other hand and slowly looking over at it. [Ghost Pot: +120/-3] [Resentment: +734640/-441259] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831144/24406069] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97624177/107275977] [Mortal Wallet: 12E,692K,180P,697R,179Da,258De,2605k] [Spirit Wallet: 0Dr,0Ph,0Th,1325Di,126Co,10479St] Tch! -Where are all the servants? I¡¯ll grab one and you can destroy the others for practice,- I tell Little Corpse standing up and dusting myself off. -All of them?- Little Corpse and the girls exchange looks. What¡¯d I miss? -If I need a servant I can take one, and then we won¡¯t need the others?- It sounds simple to me, so what¡¯s the big deal. -How about three? So the girls can have escorts so they don¡¯t get harrassed, I could probably use the help with some of my simpler tasks, and you can have someone when we¡¯re off doing other things,- Little Corpse recommends, the girls nodding along, and I¡¯m pretty sure I just heard that they don¡¯t want to sit around while I¡¯m eating and sleeping, but they¡¯ll get lonely and not help one another. -Not inaccurate,- Little Corpse admits as the girls try to protest. -This is why I like you,- I wag my finger at Little Corpse. I sit back down since it sounds like we¡¯re gonna be hammering at this for a bit. -Why not take two servants? They can take over your simple duties, and the three of you hang out,- I say while pointing between Little Corpse and the girls. -*That last one thought --. Tch! I¡¯ll have to pay a fine. -Where was I? Ah! Why not have Little Corpse as your servant when you¡¯re out? The other guy thought that he was. A powerful corpse and two deadly beauties? No one will mess with you. And Little Corpse can kill the others.- I say while gesturing towards Little Corpse with both hands. -Why not take all of them?- Little Corpse suggests, and I wonder if they planned on leading up to that. -My void is crowded enough!- I snap. Why are they trying to add new people? I don¡¯t have a large void anymore! -You... You seriously don¡¯t want to have to see anyone in your void, do you?- -You say that like it¡¯s an issue.- I don¡¯t see anything wrong with not wanting to just vibe without having to Social. They sigh, I shrug, then I wonder how the others store their bodies. -*How do the others store their corpses when they don¡¯t use them? That one dude used a script, but I think that was just a smoke bomb or something so that other disciple --. -They¡¯ve fined me for that, didn¡¯t they?- I remember I¡¯d sent Little Corpse to kill the other ¡°servant¡± in Sorrow¡¯s Roost. -Your Ghost Pot,- Little Corpse says dully while the girls facepalm. Was I supposed to just make that connection? -I thought the Ghost Pot was for souls, not bodies,- I try to trigger any Library stored ¡°Memories¡±, but I¡¯ve got a lot of concern over how many Ghosts I can store. -¡°Ghost Servants¡±,- Little Corpse says, indicating himself and the girls while the girls jazz hands. -So how am I supposed to get the servants? I thought I had to destroy them and I had a chance to get them. Like with you,- I point out. I¡¯ve killed tons of soldiers and got --. -Have I been storing defeated Soldiers in my Pot? What happens when I free their souls?- -The corpses are in your bank, but you can put them in your pot. The ones you didn¡¯t eat already,- Little Corpse put out. -Wait, so I could have just given him one of the pre-prepped soldier bodies?- I ask myself before turning to my Servants. -That¡¯s what most people do. That¡¯s why the Graveyards are farmed and Corpse Preservation is so valuable,- Little Corpse points out. -So what you¡¯ve done is truly amazing.- -Fack...- Spoiled VI Chapter Thirteen So much extra work. I did so much extra work that I didn¡¯t have to for no reason! Fack! And of course they don¡¯t understand. I did awesome so easily, I should be happy! I forged that body from scratch... For nothing. I didn¡¯t even gain a skill. Wasted resources, wasted time, reading I didn¡¯t have to do... I could have had corpses to sell to get more shit! I¡¯d been eating some of them! And they didn¡¯t have to take up space in my bank, making them easier to find, and less likely to be eaten, but no...! I had to be awesome! ... I¡¯d stolen so many armies... All those Ghost Soldiers I could have used to help purify the village and fight the Disciples. -You do know it¡¯s only awesome until someone else finds out then it¡¯s just a gimmick, right?- I snap as they berate me for being ungrateful, greedy, and lazy. -And you¡¯re dead! Are we just making observations?!- I snap. Bet they wouldn¡¯t be so happy if I wasted these resources if I didn¡¯t have them. Would they be willing to sacrifice their Resentment on these things? Would they be willing to risk their souls to help reinforce the flesh I¡¯d made for Little Corpse? -If you were so bad at managing things, you wouldn¡¯t be able to interact with us at one time,- Little Corpse points out. -You¡¯d probably be kidnapping commoners to gather Resentment and siphon their Karma, breaking their souls, and you¡¯d probably make me help you. The girls would be completely out of your league.- I grunt, uninterested in hearing weak maybes or ¡°it¡¯s not so bad¡± after how energetic they were on insulting me. -I need to figure out how to store corpses in my Ghost Pot!- I wave them off standing up and dusting off. -You want to keep looting? I¡¯m going into my void.- They opt to join me, Little Corpse and the girls move the occupied boxes into high alcoves before we go so that we can low-key reserve the servants for later, and then I¡¯m in Persephone¡¯s memorial house, lying on my back on the ground beside the bed. Hands laced behind my head as I stare up at the ceiling. Now. What¡¯s the keyword or image to access my physical Ghost Pot? Ghost Pot shows me spirits. Resentments? Ooh! I have access to Monk shit. I cackle. Purification is rewarded, saving people is rewarded, not being a dick is rewarded. Holy shiz-balls, they know I¡¯m part of a Ghost Sect. Like it¡¯s marked as a note of known affiliations. They noted that ¡°we¡±, me and the Ghost Sects, don¡¯t get along, which is good, ¡®cause I¡¯m hoarding Ghost Sect shiz out of spite. But there¡¯s also a lot of other shiz I¡¯m low-key getting linked to, mostly because of things disappearing. Stuff that I¡¯m pretty sure isn¡¯t my fault, but I don¡¯t know. I need to go back to the monastery to find out if they¡¯ve got another Reader or someone who can teach me to Scribe. -Taking stuff out of your Inner Void Library into the physical realm is Scribing!- Little Corpse snaps, and I hear him bellowing wordlessly in the distance. Found another one of his triggers, I guess. Oh, wait. So I can Scribe. Neat. And the bellowing picks up again. Whatever. What was I doing? Tch, is he crying now? He¡¯s being dramatic As Fack all of a sudden. Prolly bored. -Corpses!- I point up at the ceiling before tucking my hand back under my head. Not Ghost Pot. Not Resentments. Need to go to Monastery. What¡¯s Ghost Flame do? Oh. I¡¯ve got a little blue flame wooden torch, a measurement of how advanced my Ghost Flame skill is. It isn¡¯t. Like this is a basic wooden torch with a colored flame. Oh, shiz! Does that mean the lit path in the Hovels is like a Walk of Fame? Walk of Flame. Heh. I¡¯m gonna go touch people¡¯s shiz... My Rank is Outsider. I¡¯m going to break shit. Rude asses. Attack me, take my money, try to learn my secrets, and it¡¯s fine because I¡¯m an Outsider? I¡¯m not one of you? Fine. I¡¯m not one of you, and you keep attacking me. All your shiz? Stew pot. Dumplinged. Bet on it! Tabs, windows, and requirements. No shit? Corpse Handlers, -- Sect Initiates, -- need to collect one Ghost Servant. That¡¯s it. Initiates can rise through their section Rank by contributing Resentment, but they don¡¯t have to. So what was Widow¡¯s Sigh talking about donations for? Required donations? If I just need a Servant, why am I here? What do they say I have. A Broken Servant. Which doesn¡¯t count. What about the girls? Spirit Contract, which doesn¡¯t count. -Fuck you!- I kick and punch at the air before letting my limbs flop. Fine. I need a servant. But where do I put the bodies? Oh. Oh~! I¡¯m an Outsider with their secrets. That¡¯s why they¡¯re not pushing so hard on punishing people who attack me! Widow¡¯s Sigh makes a point to talk to me every time I¡¯m wrangled. That¡¯s what the Sponsorship is! He¡¯s telling everyone he invited me to join, now I need to step up. And I did. Without joining. Tch! Dumbasses! Should have told me how to join! All of the other bullshit could have been avoided! Now I¡¯ve got vendettas against so many people --. I pop to my inner void, racing to my library, and start asking around. Dude used Chains of Heavens and Hells on me. Twice. Did I get anything from it? ¡°Aren¡¯t you looking for how to Store corpses in your Ghost Pot?¡± one well-fed mustachioed man snaps at me, shoving a manual into my chest before walking off while shaking his head. Kinda aggressive for someone trying to help out. Is he one of my squatters? I narrow my eyes at him while trying to remember what Aunty said. Anyone who doesn¡¯t contribute gets et, but I know there¡¯s a lot of Spirits that aren¡¯t in my Pot who are also super unwilling to be here. Unwilling and working, charged to exist, doing customer service with dumbasses for dumbasses. -Tch,- I cringe in empathy, take the manual to a table, and sit down to read. I shouldn¡¯t be able to store corpses in my Pot. But I do. But I shouldn¡¯t. Or rather, the manual writers, either my ghosts or the Disciples I¡¯ve et, believe I can¡¯t. Fuck you, bank bug, I store what I want! I shrug as I remember that I bank stuff, yes, it¡¯s not all physical, yes, but if it is, there might be a place for it. Back to my void, I dust myself off, straighten my robes, and transfer to my Ghost Pot. I¡¯ve got my own stone body storage. It looks like when I tried to store all the corpses in one room, my Soak room, -- fack! I should have been sitting in the Soak! -- but with stone slabs. Halls linking rooms, with stone slabs and alcoves, and they¡¯re all empty. Where are the souls that are supposed to be in here? -They prefer your Inner Void. The ones marked Unwilling are ones you¡¯re aware of. Some of them try to stay, to work, to earn positive Karma, but you kick the marked ones out when you purify or feed on them when you meditate.- Thank you, helper fairy Little Corpse. I give Little Corpse access to this space, my Ghost Pot, so he can start stacking corpses on the slabs, ¡®cause I¡¯m far too lazy to, and then transfer back to my house for a wash and Soak. A simple snack of chilled fruit while I get in a quick Soak, I dry off, I get dressed, and then I transfer to the shop in The Hovels. I¡¯ll go back to the Trial later. Little Corpse and the girls immediately pop their happy asses out with me before I get to take a step to figure out where the door is. ¡°Who runs this shop! We demand service!¡± one of the girls shouts loudly, and I¡¯m wondering what the fack her problem is. -Rude!- Is this because the stuff used on them came from here? Or are they actually like this? I don¡¯t know if I want them running around cities, ruining my reputation, and embarrassing me like this. Why should I lose face for their loud asses? Could have just shouted ¡°who runs this shop, what do you have available¡±, but no~. The shop has a display alcove that¡¯s blocked off from the rest of the store, no door on this side, but someone comes from around the side of the building rather quickly. Bowing as they come is not the person who gave me the scroll, but they are a Disciple, and they help run the stall here, this area not worth a store. Hovels equals poor people who probably can¡¯t afford anything. -Why were the girls here? If no one can afford it, were you really willing to sell them?- Are these people that bad at business or am I missing something. -Well...- They weren¡¯t supposed to sell the girls. Ever. They were supposed to be a reward for an advanced disciple way~ the fuck in areas like the Temple Grounds, -- there¡¯s a ghost cult with graveyards, proper grounds, and temples? -- but the more powerful Disciples just won¡¯t stop throwing away their lives, and their money. -So your solution was to prop them up in the poor district in the hopes that the others wouldn¡¯t come to the slums and the people here would never be able to afford them?- If the rich people wouldn¡¯t come down here, who was leaving all the Resentment Stones? -The shop workers.- one of the girls says. -At higher levels 100 Resentment is a trivial amount, so they come down and offer us a pittance, but weren¡¯t bold enough to sign the contract,- the other says coldly. Ah~! Not rude asses. There¡¯s a bunch of creeps who tried to get them to sign different contracts like they weren¡¯t bound by flesh and magic to one already. ¡°So, you see, they were never supposed to be sold, and Cold Moon¡¯s Light gained quite a few demerits by your display,¡± the shop worker whines. -No one forced them to make the transaction! Stop whining and show us what¡¯s for sale.- The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation. Creepy bastards trying to trick young girls, not even just any girls, these two, knowing how they were created? And they want to whine? See if we show mercy. Sorry, girls. You were right. Dear gods, it¡¯s literally a shack. Well a stone shed, but Shack. There¡¯s a warded doorway with a basic curtain closing it off, then a warded counter with a wooden awning that closes off that opening. The goods? They¡¯re stored inside the shack. There¡¯s a price board, the worker sullenly explaining that he can explain what the items are, their uses, and their price for those who can¡¯t read. I don¡¯t need Servants, I¡¯m going to go grab the ones in my Trial, but how much are they worth? ¡°Well,¡± he says, looking at the sign himself. ¡°You¡¯re supposed to gain your own Servant, so there¡¯s a convenience tax. The cost is, 80--,¡± he begins, pointing at a line that says Ghost Servant, Broken Ghost Servant is only 10 Resentment and on a different line. Then his finger slides down to a Ghost Soldier. ¡°The cost is 200 Resentment per Ghost Servant, because they will let you become part of the Sect. Since you¡¯re clearly someone worth knowing, I¡¯ll sell you one for only 150 Resentment. What do you say?¡± ¡°Yes, you¡¯ll have to pay the fine if you kill them, and, no, you haven¡¯t depleted your deposit yet,¡± Widow¡¯s sigh drones from behind me, arms crossed over his chest. -So I¡¯m still an Outsider because my Servants don¡¯t count towards your requirements?- I snap at him, mentally telling myself he¡¯s trying to help, but seriously? ¡°Did you give up on your trial?¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh asks and I swear I can see the shop worker¡¯s breath, although mine forms a general cloud around my body. -Tch! I can do things without being part of your group, so I was learning how to Store servants when I have no use for them. I¡¯m not even supposed to have a Ghost Pot, but I do!- I snap, turning back and trying to decide if I should kill the shop worker or not. -Do you girls want to add him to your corpse collection?- ¡°How many corpses are we allowed to keep?¡± one of the girls asks, arm crossed, one finger raised, and eyes narrowed in concentration as negotiations begin. -Little Corpse?- I don¡¯t know how many slots I have or how many corpses I have, but he might. -Your capacity shouldn¡¯t matter,- he snaps, glaring at me. -You indulge them.- He turns to glare at the girls who stare at him with pouts and large wet eyes, mournful but hopeful. ¡°You¡¯re limited to 5 corpses. Pick them well.¡± ¡°Each?¡± one of the girls perks up, more than happy with the negotiation. ¡°Total!¡± Little Father snaps. A quick glare shutting up the girls as they start whining. -You already have 2 corpses, do you want to add this one to the collection? Remember one is half eaten and the other is almost completely intact,- I remind them. Unless they¡¯ve been snacking with their meals, the number should be right. -They¡¯ve finished the first body, and they have the skeleton sitting in a chair in their room. The second is down to the shoulders,- Little Corpse updates me. I grunt in acknowledgement, and then turn to the girls, waiting on their answer. ¡°We don¡¯t want him,¡± one of the girls says after a pause, frowning and shaking her head. ¡°Can we kill him, take his soul, and add his corpse to your material pile?¡± the other asks, clearly remembering that cultivator corpses are always valuable. Or just knowing I¡¯ll accept the body. ¡°No no no! That¡¯s unnecessary!¡± the worker holds up one hand, braced to run away, but we¡¯re literally standing at the exits. He slams a pebble the size of his thumb to the first joint, much smaller than the fist sized stones that I know are traded for currency. ¡°As proof that all is forgiven, I¡¯ll pay for your Servant! On the house!¡± -That¡¯s not worth 80 Resentment.- At most it might be 10. Does explain the variety of sizes and shapes of the stones though. ¡°Worker¡¯s Discount!¡± he says, face blank, but the lie coming so easily... ¡°You¡¯re almost out of credit,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh quips, rocking up on his toes then back down. ¡°Two servants!¡± -I thought I could only have one,- at my Rank, because hunans aren¡¯t on my level, but have Main Character syndrome despite the fact that I only count as a Heavenly Treasure. Besides. Broken Servants don¡¯t count! Come on. Lie to me! ¡°I believe in you,¡± he leans forward, elbow on the counter, giving me a thumbs up and a stern nod. This bish. I turn to walk away. I just wanted to know what things were valued at. Back to the grind. I transfer back to the loot boxes, hop back onto a closed stone casket, and wait for the others to keep checking the alcoves. I last all of ten seconds before I get bored and drum my heals on the side of the casket. Pretty quickly one of the girls comes down, flipping up the casket trapping dumbass¡¯s Servant. I might have been humming tonelessly while I waited. The girls stand on the opposite side at me, one raising their knife in a threat, the other pointing at me, and then the ¡°Basic¡± Servant ignores them to focus exclusively on me. I¡¯m not sure what the hells, but the Servant does an aerial cartwheel away from me to parkour up the alcoves, kicking off into a spin before somehow ending up facing me, fist cocked back, ready to deliver divine judgement. I transfer to my void and transfer back, the casket lid I was sitting on split. The Servant notices I¡¯m back, dropping into a defensive crouch before slowly backing away. I do a partial shift, -- I remembered! -- scythe arms and four legs, crouch down, and wait. The Servant starts circling slowly, so I sit down and start grooming. Wait. All those times I thought the bodies disappeared. We just went over this! [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Gost Pot -1 -Ghost] [Ghost Pot +1 -Ghost] [Enemy Defeated] [Ghost Servant] [+5 Karma] [+10 -Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+120/-3)] [3 x3 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x3 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +737140/-441897] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,385] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831145/24406731] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97626927/107275977] Whoa, whoa, whoa! What? Why --? Oh! No incense. Wait. No. What? I hope into my Logs because numbers no go. I... didn¡¯t just grab up the nearby spirits with one breath? Why no do? Or was that part of the incense? So... No big peace smoke, no big grab, and... Did I get it? I need Little Corpse or the girls to explain this to me... I thought I lost Karma for trapping spirits. -You gain more Karma for sealing away the more aggressive ones,- one girl says and I give her a small salute as the girls start vandalizing the place. The grab the sealed caskets and fling them out of the alcoves. -What about the Servant?- ¡®Cause that¡¯s the whole point. I watch as both girls grab Servants by the arm, a Servant in each hand, all four out at one time. Are they going to hold them for me? Release them one at a time? -Little Corpse is going to talk to them, so you --- one girl begins and then we¡¯re standing in a nice open space, in bright sunlight, in the mountains. Wake the Dead Achievement +100 - -- should receive your promotion soon.- ¡°Took you long enough!¡± Hidden Smile snaps, arms crossed in rather modest loose robes, dark brown with bright yellow spots, loose black pants, and a black under robe. ¡°How are you supposed to get promoted if you¡¯re not even smart enough to grab a basic servant? Tch!¡± he shakes his head while glaring at me, turning away slowly before stomping away. [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Gost Pot -1 -Ghost] [Ghost Pot +1 -Ghost] [Enemy Defeated] [Ghost Servant] [+1 Con. Qi] [+5 Karma] [+10 -Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+120/-3)] [3 x3 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x3 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +738440/-499093] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,392] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831146/24429795] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97626927/107275977] ¡°Oy!¡± Hidden Smile shouts. They¡¯ve stopped are just looking at me with a light frown instead of irritation and rage. ¡°You¡¯re supposed to follow me!¡± -But I¡¯m not done yet,- I say, pointing out the last two servants. I sigh and turn to the girls. -This would have been faster if you two had done the incense thing.- -It¡¯s not necessary.- -Now hurry up!- [Vengeful Ghost Sect Breathing Technique] [3 -Resentment Gained] [-5 Karma] [Last Rites Successful] [-100 HP] [Karma +100 Gained] [100 +Resentment Gained] [Gost Pot -1 -Ghost] [Ghost Pot +1 -Ghost] [Enemy Defeated] [Ghost Servant] [+1 Con. Qi] [+5 Karma] [+10 -Resentment] [Ghost Pot (+120/-3)] [3 x3 -Resentment Gained] [Karma +5 x3 Gained] [20 x120 +Resentment Gained] [Karma +50 x120 Gained] [Resentment: +757340/-503478] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,392] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831147/24440378] [Current Qi: 1905395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97761512/107275977] Spoiled VI Chapter Fourteen Ranking Advanced Vengeful Ghost Sect Initiate Rank 2 Grave Robber Hail the Dead Achievement +50 I note a new achievement, but I haven¡¯t done anything besides finish off the servants. Ranking Advanced Vengeful Ghost Sect Initiate Rank 3 Grave Marker Keeper of Lost Souls Achievement +100 Before I can say anything there¡¯s another. Ranking Advanced Vengeful Ghost Sect Initiate Rank 3 Grave Filler Darken the Lands Achievement +100 -Oy --.- Not this shit again. Rob the Grave Achievement +50 Empty the Graveyard Achievement +50 ¡°Are you listening --?¡± Hidden Smile takes a step towards me and the girls put themselves between us causing him to draw up short. -I¡¯m being spammed with information right now,- I snap, sitting down, legs folded beneath me as I angry groom. Trample the Heavens Achievement +100 -That one is for making Little Corpse!- One of the girls stage whispers in a send. ¡°You think I won¡¯t drag you?¡± Hidden Smile snaps, jabbing a finger at me, but snatching it back when the girls take a step towards him. I wonder if he notices they don¡¯t step back... I sigh, shift to my true form, barely managing to fit in the courtyard, and then I keep grooming. -Make sure to wash your hands afterwards,- I advise him. ¡®Cause scales. I wonder how many I knock free grooming? ¡°You are a terrible treasure!¡± he shrieks at me, shaking so hard his hair is mussed and he has to straighten his robes. -*Tell me you learned why I¡¯m called a Catastrophe without saying you just learned why I¡¯m called a Catastrophe?*- I snort. ¡°Eclipsed Rainbow! If you¡¯d be so kind as to follow Hidden Smile, he¡¯ll be able to guide you to the housing zone where you can set up to continue your cultivation,¡± Widow¡¯s Sigh says. I shift down to hunan, then, -- still not sure how, -- down more to hybrid form to figure out where he is. ¡°Thank you for cooperating.¡± I¡¯m not. I want to see what the setup is. I said I was going to eat people¡¯s stuff for messing with me. Kinda need to know where they put their stuff, don¡¯t I? One of the girls picks me up and I go back to grooming. -Little Corpse was worried you¡¯d be upset that he used so much Resentment to help you finish your other Requirements for Sect advancement,- one of the girls says with relief, carrying me after Hidden Smile who takes the time to bow over his clasped hands in respect to our Elder. I make a point to keep grooming before registering what was just said. -He did what? And how much?- I slowly raise my head, lowering my arms. -They didn¡¯t notice,- one of the girls drones before sighing long and loud. I still don¡¯t know which one. I narrow my eyes at them, -- not that it matters, I think they know where my sight is at all times, -- and open my Logs. Resentment spent. Cost? Paid. Ah! Um. I still had over 100 Ghost Soldier bodies, and the spirits in my Inner Void came out, temporarily, to run around my void as Ghost Soldiers. For an achievement for me. And they gained Karma, some of them taking the chance to dump their Resentment on me or beat the shit out of each other in an attempt to gain Karma for defeating Ghost Soldiers. And~ I still have over 100 Ghost Soldier bodies after they ran out of charge and vacated them. Note to self. Cultivators losing their bodies, and gaining corpse bodies, need to be trained or they can¡¯t fight for shit. Guess that¡¯s why they just stood around or did running tackles. Good job on the foresight, Little Corpse. Did these dumbasses really just teach their armies to stand around looking imposing? What a waste... -Well, you gained Resentment, so why complain?!- one of the girls pouts, stomping her foot, and snapping her sleeve at me. -They don¡¯t have access to just take the corpses again, do they?- I ask. I don¡¯t want to just get drained of Resentment or get a mega dump that cooks my soul whenever someone else feels like it -I had to do it for them,- Little Corpse tries to reassure me, but his permissions aren¡¯t very reassuring. Can all of them just randomly raise and control an army with my shiz? -Servants are less conspicuous,- he admits, and I wonder if I should make the Servants better. -You should.- -How the frick do I stop them from taking advantage of my shiz?- I¡¯m not gonna give them full permissions. -Don¡¯t.- Tch! Says it like it¡¯s that simple. They¡¯re gonna be resentful, petty, then flat out destructive ¡®cause they don¡¯t have full access. -You say this like anyone else is capable of more than just fueling them for short periods of time,- Little Corpse points out. -Wasn¡¯t that Disarray guy using an army to farm the Graveyards?!- I snap as the girls set me down on a bed that¡¯s a simple thin, cloth covered padded mat on a wood frame with cloud grass sheets in what I¡¯m assuming is supposed to be my bedroom. I probably shouldn¡¯t have been in my Logs during the tour. -Oy! What kind of house did you pick?!- -You care now? Too busy complaining to make a choice and now you want to complain more?- one of the sisters says while rolling along the ground. I¡¯m assuming she¡¯d laid down specifically to do this and not because she was tired of me. There¡¯s enough space on the bed. -Bully! See if we don¡¯t climb up there and eat you!- the other girl pokes my side, putting me out of her sight with a huff. -We moved far enough away to see which houses were occupied or not! We chose a manor befitting your Resentment capacity. Somewhere we can rest our Little Masters,- the other girl hops up, bobbing her head and wiggling her shoulders in time with her words. -How many bodies do you think you¡¯ll be allowed to pose around the house?- I ask. The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident. A manor? I¡¯m assuming there are a lot of rooms. Are they gonna have a room with the dressed skeletons playing tiles and another where they¡¯re playing instruments? -How many will you let us?- comes back the response. -Iono.- I shrug, setting up a table with food. -Ask Little Corpse.- I shift to hunan and begin begin eating while meditating on my Ghost Flame. -I¡¯m busy.- Waow~... The windows for Vengeful Ghost Flame Sect has so much more shit in them. Before they were just some basic bish guild badge bullshit, probably because I wasn¡¯t in yet, but now I don¡¯t know what an initiate can see, because I¡¯m an Advanced Grave Keeper. Don¡¯t know when, but I¡¯m assuming it was during the sound and the fury of the string of cheese I¡¯d gotten when I transferred to the Sect grounds proper, but I¡¯ve gone from Grave Digger, to Grave Robber, to Grave Marker, to Grave Filler. One more Rank until I¡¯m out of Initiate and into the real advanced Ranks! Then more Ranks after that... Fack... This sounds like too much work. -Why did I want to do this?- I ask, because I honestly can¡¯t remember. -We do your chores for you and talk to people so you don¡¯t have to,- Little Corpse snaps and I wonder if he¡¯s screaming in the void again. -*You can¡¯t fight. We can,*- one of the girls says as they set up their own little table, working very hard on making sure they¡¯re both helping place the furniture and setting dishes on their table. -*So I don¡¯t need to be here any longer...?*- I ask ¡®cause it sounds like I¡¯ve accomplished my goals. -Given up on cleaning out the Graveyards? Thought you weren¡¯t going to leave anything behind?- one of the girls says, oh, so casually, and I bristle. I can do that. -What do I need to do to rank up and access more shit?!- I snap, highly motivated, not angry. New foods, new tears of the Disciples. I¡¯m. Taking. Everything. -Four Formless Servants,- Little Corpse says, transferring from my void, and walking into the room cleaning his hands on a square of cloth. -You¡¯ll have to find four ghosts that aren¡¯t just Servants or Soldiers. The girls don¡¯t count,- he continues before I can say a word. -So... Graveyards?- I shove everything down, banking my shiz, then standing at the ready for the girls to follow suit. -Monks,- the girls say in sync. Oh. The monks might have non-standard spirits they need exorcised... Cool. I look at the girls and Little Corpse, knowing this is why I¡¯m investing in the dead over the living. -Peh! You need to pick better living,- one of the girls makes a spitting noise, leaning over and bowing her head in case I misunderstood her disgust. -We gonna do the incense thing?- ¡®Cause I wanna do the incense thing. It saves so much time! -You¡¯re going to do you and get Resentment, while we sit and finish our meal,- one of the girls says, making a point to raise her bowl to her nose, inhaling deeply and releasing a sigh. -You have enough spirits, and you¡¯ve been warned to avoid the town --,- Little Corpse begins and I fling my head back and gargle loudly. -He said to stop robbing them of their effort! They didn¡¯t create the Resentment! They just stirred it back up! It¡¯s public Resentment that they¡¯re trying to monopolize!- I shriek, pacing back and forth and flinging my arms around. -I wasn¡¯t part of the Sect yet even though Widow¡¯s Sigh made it sound like I was, and now I am, so I¡¯m just as entitled to the Resentment as they are!- -I was going to say they don¡¯t want you near the town so lets go back and keep making friends with the monks and see if we can¡¯t rob them of the source of the Resentments,- Little Corpse sighs. -I apologize for interrupting,- I bow respectfully, before standing straight and giving him a nod of approval. The grating sigh one of the girls releases is mirrored in Little Corpse¡¯s pinched brows and eyes. -Let¡¯s go learn more from the monks! We¡¯ll be calling you Little Monk soon!- I clap him on the shoulder and he just sighs. I transfer to the village and there¡¯s a thick pale fog. That smells like rich floral perfume. Fancy stuff that doesn¡¯t just smell like alcohol and allergies. Subtle shiz. -They did incense!- I shout, fists raised to the sky in victory. -Don¡¯t!- Little Corpse bellows, making my head ring. -No spirits. Just Resentment. Just sit.- -And breathe...- I go to take a deep breath, remember that he just told me not to, but he was faster. Arms wrapped around my waist he hoists me up into a bear hug, stopping me from fully inhaling. -Right. Sorry.- -I need you to do a visualization exercise...- Little Corpse says slowly, setting me back down. Little Corpse walks me through sitting down and imagining that, instead of breathing deeply and cycling my Essence and breath through my body, that I imagine lifting my antenna wafting the Essence into an ever closing or ever opening spiral. Instead I remember that I have ice cream, try to figure out what kind of milkshake I want, then reflexively try to take a sip of my imaginary triple thick milkshake with the knowledge that I¡¯m going to be suckling on the straw for an embarrassingly long time. Something opens in my chest, my scales shift on my shoulders, -- I feel like someone just updated my physical appearance, and then the scales on my shoulder start snagging and shredding my robes. -Aw, why?! What happened?- What did he make me do?! I take a deep breath to rant, verbally, out loud, and my breath hitches as my weird chest hollow clicks and my scales start pulling again. He did not just censor me. My robes pull at my scales again and I glare blankly at Little Corpse who is trying not to laugh. Until I start taking off my clothes. Suddenly he¡¯s no longer amused. I try to drone at him as he tries to tell me to stop, and get me to stop, and put my clothing back on without touching me, but every time I try to breathe my chest clicks. So I just rip the robes, because bad silk is bad, and look down to see what looks like a palm-sized paper circle on my chest below my collarbone and above my breast. I try to inhale, stopping when my built in drum clicks. Wait. No. I have a horrible thought that I¡¯ve got a built-in tok tok drum when I remember that my robes were pulling at my shoulder scales. I slowly focus on my upper back, looking away from my chest, and I¡¯ve got... Are those feathers? I¡¯ve got long ridged scales sticking off of me like lizard bed-head. But why? I try to breathe, I click, I stop. I try to breathe, I click, a monk races by while swinging a large sheet of fabric at me, the sheet wrapping around me like a cloak, and then the monk is gone. In and out without a word, just protecting my modesty. I snort, click, and cough. -Okay, what the fuck did you get me to do?- Is what I try to ask, but I have to stop my makeshift spoken word because of the fucking clicking. ¡°Hello!¡± A chipper monk runs up to me. Chipper or fucking stern, gods... I¡¯m not in the mood, you smiley fack. ¡°This might sound strange, but --.¡± ¡°(t0k)Yes, I¡¯m click(tok)ing!¡± I snap. My eyes start stinging and I remove all transfer permissions before going into my void. It won¡¯t stop! I¡¯m a bug? How do I even cry? What¡¯s happening. I force a deep breath, ignoring the clicking, just pushing through, and realize that it¡¯s a set rhythm. If I take in a steady breath. Once I get to a certain point. I click. Another full breath, three toks, and I realize I sound like the fucking tok tok drums. I mutated a fookin¡¯ percussion set tripped by my breathing. I transfer out of my void trying to swing on the over-sized little fuck who easily ducks back out of the way. Any follow up I may have is intercepted as a monk, hands raised in surrender, -- or to prove he¡¯s not grabbing anything, -- puts his back or his shoulder against me, head turned away but the back of his head, neck and ears glowing red. ¡°Listen! Listen! You¡¯re purifying the area when you breathe. Every time you breathe. Just breathe normally!¡± the monk shouts, literally leaning into me even when I¡¯m backing away trying to get off of him. ¡°Stop crushing my tits!¡± I snap. Fack off! I¡¯ve been trying not to get pushed over! He stops moving, head bowed, one hand raised, the other parallel to the ground in front of his stomach as he starts chanting E-fucking-mmediately. I breathe normally and finally notice that Silent Howl has been spamming me, but I was distracted by the sound of my built in prayer drum. Silent Howl: You¡¯ve now got a built in Resentment filter, jackass! Check your Resentment! [Ghost Pot (+120/-2)] [Resentment: +759840/-505022] [Max Will: 9,579,451] [HP: 9,579,451] [Current Condensed Qi: 1831149/24442449] [Current Qi: 1904395/957945100] [Current Karma: 97769797/107275977] Tch! That doesn¡¯t tell me anything! I punch the air while glaring at the monk, kicking the cloth he holds out to me before putting him out of my sight. I storm a few steps away, breath heaving, just rhythmically tokking. I said I¡¯m going to start taking all the loot and the fucker put a bell on me! Need some better living people. The girl was right. Deep breaths. Ignore the monks chanting, and the people bowing to me, and I¡¯m going to punch someone. I take a deep breath, getting angrier as the tokking gets faster, and then some jackass flings the sheet over me again. I¡¯m in my Logs, so I can just read, but I¡¯m kinda done. I still my mind, -- Do Not Disturb! You¡¯ve done enough! -- walk into my void, bank my clothing, go to the Soak, and the fucking tokking is purifying the water, isn¡¯t it? I feel my scales tingling, my skin tingling, my organs tingling --. Da fuq? Logs to find out what the fuck being permanent percussion gives me. Survey says... I¡¯m not filtering. Well. Technically, I am. I¡¯m auto-collecting Resentment. Ss. Resentments. By breathing. Like I do with essence. ... Yay... Why am I getting Resentment in my void? I feel the air thicken. Someone¡¯s focusing on me awful hard. Not a fan. Oh! The bears! And probably Broadband Chicken! ... Definitely Persephone during my coma years. Fack. So... I have Resentment. A lot of negative Resentment and I¡¯m gonna get a fack ton more. Let¡¯s go shopping. Probably gonna have to talk to the others and let them back in... Ugh...