《Gnomy tells all: stories from his lifetimes throughout the universes》


 Chapter 1: Gnomy starts work on the new dinosaur project

    Long ago, in my early gnome lifetimes, I specialized in working with huge prehistoric animals. I¡¯m not sure why I thought this was such a fascinating specialty. I could have worked with any animals. But nothing caught my interest like dinosaurs.


    This eagerness to work with those large and dangerous reptiles is what got me assigned to planet Earth those many millions of years ago. They were looking for gnomes who were interested in moving to this up-and-coming but out-of-the-way planet. I volunteered, along with dozens of my fellow gnomes.


    The situation was that the creator gods, who design most animals in the universes, had just started a new experiment on Earth working with newly created dinosaurs. They decided to program some of these dinosaurs for unlimited growth to see how large the animals could get in a world that was perfectly designed for them.


    I arrived on Earth soon after the gods had set up plants and animals, stabilized the environment, signed off on the concept, and moved on to other projects.


    Back then, Earth was not in a configuration anyone would recognize today. The landmass had not yet drifted into separate continents. Instead, the rocky plates were jammed together into one giant supercontinent that was perfect for the development of many types of life.


    Although Earth has always been a green planet, it was incredibly lush back then. Carbon dioxide levels were high, resulting in warm climates and huge plants. The vegetation created perfect conditions for all manner of animals, both predator and prey.


    I can still feel the oppressive heat and humidity of the ancient Mesozoic Era, so intense that it was hard to breathe. I remember my fear of being tripped up and trapped by the huge plants or being eaten by a larger animal. Any potential meal that could not defend itself or flee did not last long in that prehistoric world.


    Earth was not a quiet world. Any tranquility was destroyed by earthquakes, the constant whine of oversized insects, roars of land animals, and vibrating growls of the immense dinosaurs. Not surprisingly, all of us gnomes working there felt a constant sense of fear.


    Gnomes are used to all kinds of work environments, but keep in mind that we¡¯re not gods, we¡¯re merely magical beings occupying physical bodies. Earth was at the limits of temperature and danger that any type of humanoid can bear. Our bodies could have been easily damaged by overheating or from a quick attack from extremely large and powerful animals. We had to be very careful.


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    We set up a gnome village, built using fast-growing bamboo. Reinforced huts, tall fences and nightly watchers allowed us to sleep safely. It¡¯s fortunate that gnomes live in the light of the Creator and seldom eat, since cooking attracted every nearby scavenger. It¡¯s difficult to eat your fern and pine nut stew when you¡¯re afraid a lurking oversized vulture will swoop down and grab you.


    Have you ever tried to care for a sick brontosaurus? Or have you ever stitched up a face wound on an allosaurus? No, of course not, nobody would want to do either of those things. Yet we had to learn to help these huge and scary dinosaurs without being torn apart or crushed. It took all of our skills and creativity to find ways to mend their wounds, monitor their growth, and measure their vital functions. All of this while dodging flying pterodactyls, carnivorous plants and animals, and vicious little reptiles that tried to attack our ankles. I spent many of my Earth lifetimes covered in scars from various predators.


    I remember the sense of wonder that kept our group going on the most difficult days. Most of us gnomes really started to develop affection for the huge bad-tempered dinosaurs. They weren¡¯t like anything that had been created before, on any planet. The dinosaur body designs were innovative and at a whole new level in the universe. The dinosaurs increased in size generation after generation, fulfilling their creators¡¯ hopes.


    Gradually, where any of us would have failed working as a single gnome, our gnome group succeeded. We did manage to find ways to caretake the massive dinosaurs. We observed and methodically noted our experiences. We gathered huge amounts of charts, statistics and commentary on what we were seeing every day. It is no exaggeration to say that gnomes wrote the book on dinosaurs.


    I and my fellow gnomes not only wrote the book on how these new animals were progressing, we shared that book with the creator gods. We were involved in endless conferences and notes and projects, both with the gods and their entourage of assistants. We tried to make sure the creator gods knew they had something very special on Earth.


    We felt the dinosaurs were evolving rapidly and successfully. Indeed, all of the gnomes had only positive things to say about the dinosaurs¡¯ success both as an experiment and their potential as a long-term commitment.


    Once we briefed the gods and had their approval, we submitted our archives to the prestigious scholarly database portion of the akashic records. This was the first time most of our gnome group were requesting to add material to these records, so we were quite excited indeed.


    You can imagine our joy when our documents were accepted. It meant that our work was considered valuable and would now be an important reference for future researchers. And if I¡¯m honest, best of all was that our names would be enshrined in the akashic records for all time. Literally, the dinosaur volumes will be part of the akashic records for as long as this universe exists. Our families were incredibly proud of our achievement.


    We were extremely happy gnomes at this point. We eagerly moved on to the next steps in the experiment. We attended new planning meetings concerning the evolution of the dinosaurs, thinking that the creator gods were as happy as we were. Sadly, this turned out to be untrue. We never expected what happened next.

 Chapter 2: Gnomy and Jaal spark a prehistoric glow

    My time on Earth held much tragedy, but it left me with one enduring bright glow that has made every gnome lifetime since then into a happy experience: I met my delightful and beautiful wife Jaal there.


    Jaal was also young and new in her career, and had arrived on Earth shortly before I did. She was equally determined to do well working on the upcoming dinosaur research.


    The dinosaur project was huge. Our work group started by assembling maps of different ecological zones, and listing the many types of flora and fauna that had already been rather haphazardly scattered around Earth.


    I concentrated on working with the dinosaurs, since that was why I was hired. Transporting specialty dinosaurs to Earth from intergalactic zoos turned out to be quite a headache. They were bad-tempered and dangerous, and constantly tried to escape from their cages. The list of all the things that could go wrong was nerve-wracking.


    Jaal¡¯s specialty was not dinosaurs, but biosphere monitoring and landscape design. She was on the team that checked how well the local environments were progressing. If an area was not working out, that team had to decide whether the physical landscape would be altered or if new varieties of plants would be needed.


    Jaal and I were attracted to each other at first glance. We quickly moved onto the same work projects so that we could spend our days together. We trudged through all types of plants in all kinds of terrains. It was easy for Jaal to determine which plants were thriving, since those plants were green and growing new shoots. Noticing which plants were shredded and trampled gave me insights on which vegetation the dinosaurs found tasty.


    This detailed observation work was tedious, but it did give us a chance to talk and get to know each other better. We were hot and sweaty and tired, but the discomfort allowed us to discover exactly who we were, good and bad, during those long days. Our relationship flourished along with the dinosaurs.


    I have heard humans say that gnomes are not romantic, however, that isn¡¯t true. I wasn¡¯t able to give Jaal bouquets of cut flowers but I did give her gardens full of living flowers instead.


    Plants with big showy blooms, like roses, did not exist on Earth yet. Modest little mats of simple plants on low stems had been developed and were doing well in their new environment. The flower petals were tiny, but they were colorful and plentiful. With a little inspiration, these small florae were perfect as the basis for a beautiful vista.


    I planted an entire large meadow with carpets of tiny colorful flowers. Viewed against the existing background of waterfalls, pine trees and mountain peaks, the panorama was stunningly beautiful. I even wove a few rustic arched bridges, built from vines, and set them over small streams. I hammered small lanterns to hang from the bridges, ready to light for a bit of soft illumination. I found textured and colorful stones to brighten up low spots that might become slippery.


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    When everything was perfect, I brought Jaal to the highest bridge with the most stunning view. Her reaction to the magnificent scenery was everything I had hoped it would be. She was awestruck by the beauty of flat valleys that gradually rose to become foothills and then distant mountain peaks. I told her I named our area Jaal¡¯s Meadow.


    I will never forget standing on that bridge, holding hands, as the sky changed from fiery reds to cool lavender tones. Being young and in love, the entire evening was a magical experience.


    I proposed to Jaal on that splendid evening. I had hammered out a simple silver engagement ring, so I¡¯d have it with me if she said yes. I turned to Jaal with my question.


    Gnomes are shy and private with our emotions, but I can confirm that Jaal said yes.


    At that point our relationship became even deeper. Our conversations moved from being mostly about work to opening up about our dreams and goals. We met in the meadow often, to stroll hand-in-hand through the flowers, or to sit and dream. We never grew tired of the lovely views, or of the colorful sunsets and silver misty evenings. It was like Earth was created just for the two of us.


    Gradually the birds would settle down for the evening and their songs were replaced by other noises. Night animals would rustle through greenery as they started on their nightly rambles. Insects would call to each other. Frogs filled the night with choruses of sound, even as they remained hidden from us.


    Perhaps best of all, the silent fireflies added their hypnotic light displays. The random glows added a dreamlike quality to the entire meadow. During a full moon, it was sublime.


    As the evening darkened, we would light small lanterns for a bit more illumination. We didn¡¯t use the powerful alchemist-created fire starters. We feared accidentally igniting a huge brushfire. Instead, we struck our old-fashioned flint tinderboxes. The sparks were perfect for igniting a small but steady glow.


    I always managed to keep the dinosaurs out of our enchanted meadow, since I had created it to be Jaal¡¯s and my private preserve. I felt like this was a charmed spot where nothing could ever go wrong. Our small love flames became ever brighter as we discussed our future.


    Gnomes marry for only a single lifetime but are free to marry again and again during any of their future lifetimes, if they wish. Jaal and I have indeed married during every gnome lifetime. We have raised children and experienced diverse and challenging years together. Our devotion to each other has been a constant glow of strength for us.


    I get nostalgic looking back at that time in Jaal¡¯s Meadow on planet Earth. We were such young and happy souls. We naively looked forward to our future together and proudly continuing to work on the dinosaur project throughout many lifetimes.


    When I think back to that time, I am still unhappy and angry at how poorly the creator gods handled ending the dinosaur experiment on prehistoric Earth. There was no excuse for the death and destruction they caused.

 Chapter 3: The dinosaur experiment ends badly

    All the gnomes working on the dinosaur experiment thought it was going so well: the dinosaurs¡¯ sleek body designs and the tropical Earth environment were perfectly synced. The biosphere systems were running smoothly. I thought we were going to be shepherding the dinosaurs from being successful experiments to being successful permanent residents of Earth.


    Imagine how shocked we were when the creator gods ended that experiment. And the way they did it, with a big asteroid hitting the Earth and no advance notice to anyone. Can you believe the arrogance? One minute Earth was beautiful, the next minute it was blasted by a huge rock from outer space that destroyed almost everything.


    The gods did not even tell our gnome workgroup that it was going to happen. I sensed the huge rock coming at the final moment, and in a fraction of a second, I had transported myself out of there. There wasn¡¯t even time to warn anybody else.


    There were dozens of gnomes working all over Earth. Of course, my first thought was where was Jaal? We quickly communicated telepathically. Fortunately, my beloved fianc¨¦e Jaal had transported out in time and gone to her home planet.


    It took me a while to catch up with everybody telepathically or in person, to see who made it and who didn¡¯t. We had no central meeting spot picked out ahead of time since Earth was considered a low-risk planet. Our surviving group was confused and in disarray when we finally met.


    Ultimately, the news was grim. Only about half of the gnomes made it out alive. Forty gnomes got caught by the blast and its resulting shock waves and plasma fire. Even the surrounding atmosphere was partially vaporized.


    In my grief, I needed to see exactly what had happened. I borrowed a small runabout spaceship and went back to view the remains of Earth from orbit.


    I saw that the tropical regions where most of the dinosaurs had lived was completely gone. The lovely and tranquil meadow where I proposed to Jaal, was gone. A huge, smoking blast crater covered the entire area now.


    I couldn¡¯t see that any of the large dinosaurs remained on Earth. Ship sensors didn¡¯t pick them up either, although readings verified that some of the small winged dinosaurs still survived.


    Trees and greenery were still alive in the untouched parts of the planet, so it looked like the biosphere would heal. There was still oxygen in the atmosphere, meaning at least some animals would recover. These encouraging indications meant that Earth could regenerate itself eventually. Already the ocean had flowed in to cover most of the huge crater.


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    After the heartbreaking experience of losing so many of my friends, I decided to stay with my parents for a while on their home planet. I was quite angry and inconsolable. Jaal and my family were worried about me. They spent as much time with me as they could to give their support.


    Jaal helped me to file a formal complaint with the local star system federation. Of course, nothing came of it. There is rarely a way to hold the creator gods to account when they cause a catastrophe.


    I did get an insincere bureaucratic apology for the ¡°misfortune¡± that the gods caused. The planetary federation also apologized for the Earth catastrophe. The apologies were so meaningless that if they had been written on paper instead of being electronic, I would have burned them in a bonfire.


    Although gnomes are aware that we reincarnate, having to recycle into a new life is a huge event. Since every lifetime is supposed to add to a soul¡¯s experiences and therefore progress a soul spiritually, a being can¡¯t just step into a new life. Rebirth requires a great deal of thought and weighing of options. And of course, the still-living families will badly miss the presence of their son or daughter or relative. There¡¯s no guarantee the departing soul would even come back to a new gnome lifetime, or when it would happen. It is highly traumatic for everyone.


    Shockingly, we never got an official explanation as to why Earth was destroyed. I have heard that the creator gods felt the dinosaurs were at an end. They had evolved to be huge, which was the goal of the research project. There wasn¡¯t anything scheduled for them after that so their usefulness had ended.


    Eventually, we heard that the Creator of All had specifically ordered its pantheon of creator gods to begin an experiment inspired by the cleverness of Earth¡¯s early monkeys. Monkeys were seen as interesting to watch, but not quite upgradeable into complex beings. Prototype early humans were given a new highly advanced design. A larger brain, better hand coordination and more refined body shape were the most significant changes.


    The creator gods called their new humanoid manipulation project the ¡°Garden of Eden¡±. They were quite enthused about its possibilities.


    I guess to the gods it was worth brutally removing dinosaurs for a chance to develop the more interesting human beings. They quickly forgot the dinosaur research project and hugely enjoyed planning this more intricate experiment.


    I shouldn¡¯t make it sound like the dinosaur research was all catastrophe and disaster for me, although it seemed so at the time. I had to remind myself that I met Jaal there. I still had many friends who had survived. I became closer to my family as they helped me mourn my beloved dinosaur world.  They helped turn me away from grief so I could anticipate the good things in my future.


    I had also gained a huge amount of practical terraforming experience, which would help me move into new and interesting work opportunities. In fact, after an extended rest to recover from my trauma and sadness, I ended up moving in a surprising new direction.

 Chapter 4: The Garden of Eden, a lush and perfect life

    There is a lot of gossip about why the prehistoric dinosaur world ended and why the Garden of Eden was created to replace it. Since no official explanation was issued, everybody around the universes has felt free to speculate on the subject.


    The most accepted story is that God the Creator of All had decided on a lofty and sublime new design for Earth, involving placing humans into a new setting created just for them. Such a unique project would be interesting to intelligent beings everywhere.


    You may find it odd, but I realized that I was interested in the new project too. I wanted to work on the fascinating plan to turn the ruined prehistoric Earth world into another lush garden, this time filled with an explosion of modern animals and plants. So, I applied and was sent back to the redesigned Earth.


    This new project was officially named the Garden of Eden.


    It¡¯s a name that is often used rather generically for the whole Earth at that time. However, the actual Garden of Eden refers to a specific section of Earth that had been created with definite boundaries. Those boundaries were not hard edges or walls, but were simply places where the perfect bountiful environment ended. Adam and Eve, as the first two humans, were intended to reside inside the Garden forever. Their lives were very pampered and every need was provided in the most beautiful ways.


    Luscious fruit literally dropped from the trees onto Adam and Eve¡¯s laps. All food just appeared to the pair when they wanted it, often in beautifully woven baskets. Shelter was provided by interwoven vines that grew into pavilions placed just where they needed to be, out of the wind and with exquisite views in all directions. The amount of sunshine and the daily temperatures were always just right.


    Every view in the Garden was charming and every animal was enjoyable to watch. Adam and Eve had no need to learn to garden, or to hunt the graceful animals in their domain. This beautiful and most special garden, set as the most superb location in the middle of a vast variety of exquisite landscapes, was a delight. It seemed that only a glorious future was possible here.


    I have often been asked about what kind of relationship I had with Adam and Eve while I worked in the Garden of Eden. To tell the truth, there was no relationship at all.


    I was under strict instructions from the creator gods, who have the task of setting guidelines for us mere Garden workers, not to have anything to do with them. This prohibition was to ensure there would be no chance of accidentally taking any action that could change the way Earth history was meant to unfold. Remember that we were at the very beginning of Earth¡¯s new timeline, and the consequences of any mistake would be magnified and continue to resonate throughout history. I got to be very good at hiding from the pair as they travelled the Garden.


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    I did admire Adam and Eve, though. They had been fashioned to be beautiful to look at, but had been expected to have little more intellect and personality than two statuettes on top of a wedding cake. It seems astonishing that everyone had forgotten that they had been given the capacity to develop more advanced thoughts.


    Although all of their desires were met and there was no need for evolution of thought, the unexpected happened. The humans started to develop intelligence.


    First of all, Adam and Eve looked at themselves in pools of water and became aware of themselves as living beings separate from each other. They listened to birds twittering and got the idea to develop language, so they could more easily communicate with each other.


    Adam and Eve started to look at the teeming life around them and compare observations. They exclaimed out loud at the variety of living things that filled every possible area in their Garden. They noticed that plants droop and die without water, and this led to noticing the great waterfalls and peaceful lakes all around them. They wondered why water flowed, where it came from and where it went.


    They puzzled over why we have blue sunny skies and gray rainy days and green living plants. They watched the animals and wondered why each species acted so differently, and why animals even existed.


    They eventually started to wonder why they were made so very differently from the wildlife around them, and why they were the only two of their kind. After all, they could easily see that every type of animal had babies that grew up to start their own families.


    Also, they could observe that every animal and insect in the Garden enjoyed apples. Apples were an important food source, plus they looked and smelled delicious. Why had apples been ordered to be off limits to humans? Berries and other fruits were just fine for a meal. It was a prohibition they didn¡¯t understand.


    I loved watching the two humans in the Garden of Eden. I thought their evolution into thinking humans from a very rudimentary humanoid design was coming along very well. The Garden around them just got more and more beautiful and complex, too. The continuing increase in the variety of animals and plants living there was astounding. There was plenty of room for the Garden to expand, so I felt like the project could develop indefinitely.


    I was so enthused that I decided to change my traditional gnome name. My name had existed only as a thought form in the gnome psyche. It contained various references to my clan, the planets I had worked on, work specialties, close friends, and on and on. The thought form would have been impossible for humans to pronounce even if I had tried to translate it. Instead, I took the name Eden as a tribute to this special land and the two humans in it.


    Eden is a name quite befitting a gnome who spends his lifetimes working on beautiful gardens throughout the universes. I love the name. However, most people still just call me Gnomy, which works as well, I guess.


    As with the dinosaur project, I thought that the Garden of Eden would be a long-term success on Earth. And as before, it just shows how little I understand the thinking of the Creator of All.


    The Creator decided that a problem was starting to develop: the humans were too curious. Just because Adam and Eve couldn¡¯t answer the multitude of questions they thought about, didn¡¯t mean they wouldn¡¯t stop asking them. Just because they were forbidden to consume a fruit, didn¡¯t mean they wouldn¡¯t find that prohibition to be puzzling and hard to accept.


    Adam and Eve didn¡¯t realize it, but due to their dawning intellect they were about to set off an upheaval that would shatter their perfect world.

 Chapter 5: Garden of Eden and the knowledge of suffering

    While out walking through the woods one fine summer day, Adam and Eve met a new resident of the Garden of Eden. It called itself a snake. This snake flicked its forked tongue at the two humans and introduced itself as the serpent of knowledge. It claimed it was sent to answer their questions about the Garden and the natural world around them.


    The snake was a welcome change from God the Creator of All, who always grew very angry when Adam and Eve expressed curiosity. The slippery reptile satisfied their thirst for knowledge by teaching them as much as their still-developing brains could comprehend. The humans loved the daily lessons the snake set up for them. In consequence, the snake easily gained their trust and was made welcome.


    The humans found the snake¡¯s stories about God¡¯s creation of their natural world uplifting and awe-inspiring. Stories about the lovely plants and beautiful flowers within the Garden were very popular. The humans also liked hearing about why there were so many kinds of animals and why they behaved as they did. Most of all, Adam and Eve enjoyed stories about animal parents and their babies. They wondered if they could ever have their own human babies.


    Adam and Eve asked to hear the stories again and again. They treasured every bit of information.


    The snake told tales about how bees traveled all over the Garden to pollinate flowers. It smoothly slipped in an explanation about how apples were fruit, and fruit grew from flowers on trees. Sure enough, Adam and Eve observed tiny white blossoms becoming beautiful red apples. And they only had to observe animals eating the crisp and fragrant fruit to wonder how apples would taste and whether they would like them.


    Well, we all know what happened next. Adam and Eve found apples to be just delicious. In fact, they became quite fond of mixed fruit salads on top of watercress. They enjoyed the fantastic new flavor sensations. The happy humans almost forgot that God had specifically forbidden apples to them.


    Now really, things in the Garden of Eden did not have to end the way they did. God could have just accepted that humans had inquisitive minds and would never be happy as lovely but ignorant figurines. God could have found a way to provide knowledge while keeping humans humble and content in their perfect Garden.


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    Instead, the story goes on to say that God severely punished its human creations. It drove them out of paradise and into a terrible poverty of body and spirit. God abandoned the humans and left them in the wilderness.


    The snake and the fickle creator gods, not wanting to get caught up in scenes of heavenly wrath, left the planet.


    Adam and Eve were all alone. Fortunately, they were able to use their recently acquired knowledge of the natural world to help them survive. That information was all they had left to help them as they started over. The practical lessons from the serpent ended up being the thing that saved them.


    Humans concentrated on adapting to their new, bewildering and incredibly difficult environment. They learned to survive and even thrive. However, they never quite forgot the story of the Garden of Eden and their sadness at having to leave its perfection.


    All in all, God had struck a terrible setback to early humans. The world outside of the Garden was a difficult place with much danger and little leeway to make mistakes. It¡¯s a wonder that these weak beings survived at all.


    The story of the Garden of Eden has never been forgotten around the universes. There have been many historical documents written about that time period on Earth and its effect on the following generations of Earthlings. Indeed, scholars point to events in the Garden as one of the causes of the anger that still seems to drive human beings. Rage and poor judgement have followed humans throughout their history.


    It seems like all types of beings across the universes have strong opinions on the future of humans. Should the human beings be left alone to evolve naturally? Should their cranial capacity be increased to help them develop faster? Should they be helped during crucial events in their timeline? Or was the Creator correct to leave them alone to struggle? And should they be allowed to colonize and risk spreading their poor decisions across the universes?


    At this point it¡¯s still up in the air whether humans will achieve their destiny as a valued part of the cosmic neighborhood or fall back into the pit of ignorance.


    Living and working on Earth eventually became too much for a peace-loving gnome like me. I was burned out watching the struggles of Earth to become a successful planet. Going through the dinosaur obliteration, watching humans flail after they left the Garden of Eden, then seeing the humans turn around and create their own destruction on their beautiful planet, was really too much for me. It was healthier for me to move on to another work project. I had to sever all ties.


    Still, I have never changed my name from Eden during all my time away from Earth. I like the association with the creation of a vital new life form. It¡¯s also an acknowledgement that I still have hope for humans to achieve great and lofty civilizations across the universes.


    We¡¯ll all be watching to see what happens.

 Chapter 6: From green Earth to purple Kepler 5

    After my disastrous time on Earth, where I witnessed the dinosaurs being destroyed and humans being removed from the Garden of Eden, I was looking for my next assignment. I was feeling rather sad and wanted to work on a planet with a better chance of success.


    I was happy to snag a long-term assignment on a nearby planet called Kepler 5. They were looking for two gnomes, so my delightful wife Jaal agreed to move there with me. We thought it would be a kind of honeymoon for us.


    Kepler 5 was a small rocky world. It was close enough to Earth for us to see its sun as a bright star in the night sky. Even though I was happy to leave Earth, I missed it and the sight comforted me.


    Kepler 5 was comparable to Earth in many ways, full of water features and bursting with a multitude of plants and animals. A population of prototype humanoids also lived on the planet. They were very similar to humans, though less advanced.


    Even the vegetation was similar to Earth ¡­ except for one strange thing. The foliage wasn¡¯t green, it was purple. All the leaves on all the plants were shades of purple. They were the shades of a purple rainbow, from bright raspberry to pinkish lavender to deep maroon. Not just in autumn, but they held their purplish colors all year.


    The animals had also evolved to be purple toned, which made sense since they needed to blend in among the purple plants. The humanoids were not purple since their skin had to absorb vitamin D, but they liked to dye their clothes and hair with purple plant dyes.


    The Kepler 5 sky was likewise filled with hazy purplish tones. The light ranged from pinkish-lavenders to mid-purples to deep twilight bluish-purples.


    The next strange thing was that the planet itself was contained within a triple-sun solar system. These suns had a complicated pattern of rising and setting, so the skies, although always purple-toned, were never truly dark. That doesn¡¯t sound bad, but we found it to be very strange. Neither of us had never lived on a planet with more than one sun. The constantly changing sky became a headache-inducing element for us.


    Due to no true nighttime on the planet, the animals had evolved a far more flexible system of sleep than on most planets. Every species, including humanoids, just napped randomly as the planet dimmed and lightened. Their sleep patterns had no definite Circadian rhythms, they were simply based on whether the animals felt safe enough to fall into slumber for a while. After a few hours they would awaken and get back to the business of their world, feeling refreshed.


    Gnomes are not made this way. Sure, we can wake unexpectedly and function, or even alter our sleeping schedules artificially to match the planet we are living on. However, we must get an average of at least six hours of sleep every 24 hours to survive long term. It is a limitation of our earthly corporeal bodies.


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    Needless to say, the constant activity of animals and humanoids was very trying to both Jaal and me. If you think not getting enough sleep makes you grouchy after one night, try it for a few millennia.


    As we were the only gnomes caretaking Kepler 5, we decided to take different work shifts so each of us could leave the planet as often as possible. We found that instantly transporting back to our home planet to sleep in our own bed was best. Otherwise, we were short-tempered and irritable. It was better not to see each very often other than to argue every time we did see each other.


    Not only did we get little sleep on that world, but the constant purple became nauseating to us. It turned out that so much lavender and purple was actually disruptive to our health.


    We tried painting the walls in our cottage beautiful shades of green and added tranquil pale blue ceilings to give us an illusion of being on a normal planet, but it didn¡¯t help much. Our chronic bad tempers turned small arguments into big, loud disagreements until one of us had enough sense to just transport away. It was a terrible strain on our new marriage.


    In those early days of Kepler 5 there were frequent storms in the atmosphere, which seemed to mirror our unhappiness at living there. I vividly remember cycles of dark purple clouds that would combine with even darker purplish-black skies. The threatening skies quickly built into screaming windstorms. The rain didn¡¯t so much lash down as blow sideways.


    Sometimes the storms became so dangerous that we had to transport out and wait in our home world for the duration of the storm. At least we would have two or three days of tranquil enjoyment amongst family and friends on a green planet before we had to head back to inspect the purple damages.


    Believe me, it was always difficult to return to that strange and unsettling world after being on our lovely sunny home planet.


    On another level, I did like the intelligent humanoids who were developing there. Like on Earth, we didn¡¯t interact and didn¡¯t show ourselves. These people did get enough of a peek at us to have fables about the ¡°little people¡± who helped out on their planet. I enjoyed their highly embellished stories. Were Jaal and I the noble, wise and all-knowing royalty they thought we were? Did we really deserve to be called the Prince and Princess of Purple? Did we deserve the laudatory myths and songs? Surely not.


    We did accept the lovely matching crowns they sometimes left for us to find. The original crowns were merely woven grass, which eventually progressed to carved wood, and finally became pure gleaming silver, beautifully beaten and chased. Since the crowns were not offered as any kind of religious token, we were allowed to accept them. Jaal and I enjoyed all of the crowns tremendously and still have them.


    Individual residents constantly left small gifts for us, mostly choice pieces of fruit and baked goods. I learned to really enjoy their version of baked banana-orange-oatmeal bars. And I especially liked the spicy egg-cheese-chili pepper casserole bites.


    How can you not like a civilization that treats you so well, even when they have barely seen you? We were impressed with the society and how steadily they were advancing in their unique way. We ended up writing many positive reports over the years. It was fascinating to see how their people coped with purple storms. They developed very differently from Earth¡¯s people.

 Chapter 7: Kepler 5 matures into a pleasant planet

    Kepler 5 humanoids seemed so similar to Earth¡¯s humans, but their civilizations developed very differently.


    The Keplerites deeply cherished their purple planet. Unlike humans, who have never minded pushing their planet to the brink of disaster, on Kepler 5 it seemed the destructive winds resulted in gratitude for everything that still survived afterwards. A caring and cohesive society evolved to sustain them through the constant repair of storm damages, instead of a competitive spirit and a wish to strip the planet¡¯s assets bare.


    Also, unlike Earth which had severe restrictions set upon humans in the Garden of Eden, Kepler 5 never had any limitations on learning or had special foods that were designated as strictly off-limits. I would have thought the freedom to learn anything they wanted would have made Kepler 5 into a scholarly world, but that didn¡¯t happen.


    I find it disappointing that the Keplerites have not valued knowledge and education over the hundreds of thousands of years they have existed. The Keplerites invented a basic language and alphabet for everyday needs, but really didn¡¯t go further than that. Instead, they concentrated on their remarkable design capabilities. Their uniquely constructed woven items are renowned throughout the galaxy. Their knowledge of how to build sturdy woven houses has been extensively studied and adapted for use on other worlds. Unfortunately the history of how their society developed their special art is rather unknown, since so few records were kept by them. They would have to visit the akashic records to find more information.


    Most of the Kepler 5 societies still worship the local wind gods, but always in a humble way. In contrast to the wild storms that were destructively twisting around the planet, the Keplerites gained mental strength from holding tightly to stillness. Their religions always consisted of stillness in quiet meditations, prayers and silence. They prayed for the winds to slow down and the planet to become quiet and tranquil.


    Their prayers eventually worked, if you like to think of it that way. The storms lessened as the distances between the three suns were adjusted by atmospheric specialists. The magnetic fields around the planets were strengthened, resulting in many storms simply staying above the surface of the planet instead of raging across it. There is still rain, but not as much. Without the accompanying wind, the rain has lost quite a bit of its destructive power.


    These atmospheric improvements were quite gradual and, unfortunately, not completed until after Jaal and I left the planet. Kepler 5 is supposed to be fairly pleasant now, despite its purple hues and continued frequent downpours.


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    I don¡¯t ever go back to visit that purple world. The mere thought gives me a headache. Jaal laughs at me and has travelled there a few times to check up on its progress. She has returned with positive reports and locally-made souvenirs.


    I admit that their purple wood carvings are stunning, full of gracefully designed animals and vines. The woven baskets are sophisticated design achievements, with elegant proportions and subtle purple color variations. Jaal picked up traditional flutes for meditation music, and amulets that are supposed to protect the wearer from angry storm gods.


    Jaal even brought home a few clever carvings of the Prince and Princess of Purple. I¡¯m happy to see they are presented as good-natured figures from a folk story instead of as actual royalty.


    I can¡¯t stand to have any of the purple items in our living space, so Jaal displays them in her office where I don¡¯t have to see them. I don¡¯t enjoy the items but I do enjoy the private joke between Jaal and me.


    After our Kepler 5 assignment finally ended, Jaal got lucky and managed to grab a lengthy post on a recently terraformed tropical paradise of a planet, where she was surrounded by a single yellow sun, blue skies, colorful birds and flowering plants. At the base of black volcanic mountains were miles of white beach meandering to meet blue ocean. The bright colors were a balm to both our jaded eyes. Best of all, there was hardly a purple tone in sight.


    What a delight that planet was. I met Jaal there frequently during her assignment, and our time spent there was the honeymoon we had wanted. Of course, this beautiful and peaceful planet was also a perfect party planet. Being young and energetic, we had lots of festive events with friends and relatives.


    Jaal is an environmental designer and biosphere specialist. Her tropical assignment was to determine the future of that planet and whether it would be developed into cities with open coastal areas, or a less populated patchwork of small towns, or lightly populated as a resort planet, or left mostly wild for hikers and adventurers.


    The opinions of our many guests were actually helpful in deciding on possible scenarios. Jaal eventually recommended building small cities with extensive open areas and natural coastlines.


    Jaal had scored a perfect work project and was extremely happy. In contrast, I couldn¡¯t find a permanent assignment that satisfied me. I guess my restlessness after so many years of lurid purple showed every time I interviewed with the gnome council. Instead, I spent time bouncing around various short-term gigs on numerous worlds.


    Sometimes the universe makes you work hard for what you want, and even then you may not get it. However, you never know what¡¯s in the future.


    If the Keplerites could succeed in getting what they wanted, then maybe I could succeed too. I just had to keep trying.

 Chapter 8: Gnomy doesn鈥檛 do well as a shuttle pilot

    I spent far too much time working at short, unimportant assignments once I finished on Kepler 5. I just couldn¡¯t seem to get myself set up for a better job. Apparently working on the unsuccessful dinosaur project and questionable Garden of Eden project was a detriment to my career. Fortunately Kepler 5 had been successful, except that I left before it ended.


    Looking for something a little different to try, I signed up to be a shuttle pilot. There was a temporary shortage of pilots to transport intergalactic dignitaries from their hotels to various high level meetings taking place throughout the sector. I thought, why not? Maybe I¡¯ll meet someone important and they will recommend me for something more challenging.


    I was assigned to transport a VIP council member onto an asteroid-damaged planet that was in the middle of a major restoration. The VIP was to attend a routine inspection tour that had been set up to confirm that work contracts were being completed correctly. All in a day¡¯s work for both of us.


    Yes, this was a very basic piloting task, so it should have gone well. I merely needed to use a small space shuttle to pick up and drop off the bureaucrat. The VIP official was a humanoid named Rep Beezle, and I think under other circumstances she might have been quite a pleasant person.


    Bear in mind that I am used to teleporting instantly to wherever I need to go. This means I wasn¡¯t very familiar with spaceships, or interplanetary travel networks, or even what the local stars should look like as we flew past.


    I did study the routes ahead of time and thought I programmed them into the navigation system correctly. However, back in those early days the systems were not sufficiently advanced to catch subtle user errors.


    I like to think ¡­ no, to be honest, I have actually been told ¡­ I helped advance those systems significantly.


    My first error was to select the wrong branch of the multi-dividing Verux Galaxy wormhole. After missing the correct Branch One and speeding through Branch Two of the wormhole, I then compounded the error by hurling us through the Naresh Wormhole Local instead of the Nasheer Wormhole Minor.


    By the time I realized my mistakes, we had ended up at the First Moon of Pi 3 instead of the planet called Pi Infinite 3, where we were meant to meet the inspection group.


    The shuttle gently set itself down on the flight dock, a task that I had managed to program correctly.


    At this point, I could see that we had obviously landed at the wrong location. However, I was frozen with shock. I let Rep Beezle open the hatch and step out of her closed compartment into a desolate and dusty landscape. Rep Beezle turned to look at me. Her glare was enough to send me scurrying to find out where exactly we were.


    I could see that we had set down at an empty space dock, with sand and scrubby wind-blasted pine barrens all around us. It was just sand and grass and stunted trees. Fortunately, we had arrived between sandstorms, so we were safe standing outside. The glaring sun and extreme heat knocked us back a bit, but at least the oxygen levels were adequate.


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    I finally noticed a group of workers nearby among the trees. I hastened over to find out who they were, where we were, and how to get out of there.


    It turns out that the First Moon of Pi 3 was a sap moon, and the dozen or so workers were part of a sap crew. Sap crews visited various locations throughout many universes, searching for rare saps which they sold as delicacies. They were easily able to give me proper directions.


    I hurried back to the shuttle and was pleased to tell Rep Beezle that I knew where we were and how we went wrong. I¡¯d have us at the correct Pi location in no time.


    We turned to the open door of the shuttle but it closed in our faces. The shuttle rushed off without us. We were left standing alone on the dock, a parting breeze in our faces.


    Rep Beezle gave me a death glare and told me to fix this now.


    Utilizing maps and a wormhole schedule, I figured out what happened. The wormhole we had used was not a permanent wormhole. Instead, it was a regularly repeating wormhole. The shuttle had been programmed to return to its original base before the wormhole closed if no one was on board. It had simply followed instructions.


    Of course, as a gnome I could have instantly teleported off the pine barrens moon, but Rep Beezle could not. I had to stay with her and request an official VIP shuttle on an ASAP basis.


    We had to wait on that moon for four of its days, until the wormhole opened up again.


    Luckily, the sap workers were delighted to have company. They were a rough and rowdy crew but friendly and hospitable with food and drink. Since these are the basic requirements for a fun party, even Rep Beezle had to admit we had some enjoyable evenings during our visit.


    I spent my days hiking around the area and inspecting the local plants and animals. It was the best way to avoid Rep Beezle and her simmering wrath. It was also an excellent opportunity to see if I could somehow find a glorious new scientific finding, anything at all, to mitigate the humiliation I knew was waiting for me when we got back.


    I only salvaged my future gnome career because that desperate strategy worked.


    I found a colony of Wengalese Zebras in a savannah area on the opposite side of the moon, peacefully chewing on long grasses. This was a sensational find.


    The zebras on this moon were the identical zebras found on the planet Wengala in a neighboring dimension. It was the first proof that animals can travel through dimensions when the boundaries between those dimensions were particularly close and the energies similar. This had been widely speculated but not verified.


    I took some holographic photos of the attractive zebras and their even more attractive babies. I also got some video footage of a gateway to the next dimension opening up before it gradually drifted away again. The zebras could be seen traveling through the opening with a nonchalance that showed they clearly walked to Wengala on a regular basis.


    Zebras walking through gateways to other dimensions made a popular headline across multiple news outlets in the following weeks. The holographic photos of the Wengalese zebras were widely downloaded.


    I even gave a few interviews about my findings. I did not mention getting lost nor did I mention Rep Beezle, who made clear that she did not want to be associated with me in any way. That was fine with me. I was happy to avoid sharing my newfound celebrity fame with her.


    Obviously, the planetary council could not fire a pioneering researcher who made such an important discovery. I kept my job and managed to redeem myself in later projects. I think they must have put a big red note somewhere in my file, because none of my projects involved working as a shuttle pilot ever again.

 Chapter 9: The reclamation of planet RW12

    After my unexpected scientific success on First Moon of Pi 3, the gnome council grudgingly gave me an opportunity to work on a planetary reclamation project. Working on a destroyed world can be very difficult, but I happily said yes.


    Destroyed worlds come about for many reasons. It might be because the inhabitants ruined their world through accidents in energy-producing inventions; or because of nuclear war; or perhaps the planet was destroyed by hostile beings from another world. It can even be due to natural forces, like a meteor strike or a solar flare. Typically, the inhabitants will have fled or been killed. The natural resources will have been destroyed or stolen. Word about the catastrophe makes it way around the galaxy quickly, and bands of looting outlaws start terrorizing all the planets in the area.


    Reclaiming a planet is an expensive project coordinated across a galaxy¡¯s worlds, with many types of beings taking part in the hard work. Since gnomes specialize in caring for planets, we are always involved in the effort.


    I was excited to get involved in my first planetary renovation project. I was assigned to an Earth-like planet that was simply called RW12. This formerly green and charming world had been attacked by invaders from another dimension. Unfortunately for little RW12, it had a molten core that was high in the metal bismuth. The invaders destroyed the planet solely to collect this metal that was rare in their own dimension.


    The invaders had developed a smash and grab technique to quickly destroy an entire planet. First, they attacked and overwhelmed a population. Then they detonated nuclear bombs to vaporize the surface. Next the invaders drilled deep to get to the bismuth. They extracted the mineral and simply tossed waste tailings and broken machinery across the planet.


    On RW12, the formerly beautiful countryside was now blasted into upheavals of charred rocks. Radioactive fragments had been left scattered across its surface. Mixed in with the deliberate destruction were huge runs of lava caused by earthquakes and volcanic action. As the volcanoes calmed, the climate morphed into ice and snow. Most species of life had been destroyed. Prospects for a natural recovery on the planet were nonexistent.


    This is the bleak scenario that I and other workers found when we arrived. It was distressing for everyone who saw it, but for gnomes who are accustomed to making an already-thriving planet better, it was especially painful. However, we were determined to succeed at the reclamation.


    I was assigned a sector of RW12 and given a spaceship with an advanced scanning system to help me conduct an intensive survey of the area. I found the expected high radiation levels and planetary chaos. What I found that was unexpected was that some radiation beings, or radbees, had already found RW12 and moved in.


    Radbees are instantly recognizable because they are so unique-looking. They bring an immediate reaction of revulsion to all humanoid beings.


    Radbees have black, hairless, charred-looking bodies that resemble lumps of carbon. They even smell like burnt chemicals. They shuffle on two legs, but their society is reminiscent of an ant colony. They work together and burrow deep into the earth. They do have enough intelligence to use technology, and can be seen buzzing around a planet¡¯s atmosphere in their distinctive cobbled-together air cruisers.


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    A colony of radbees is a big problem because they will never allow a planet to recover while they are living there. Radbees need radiation to survive, so they will constantly bombard a planetary atmosphere using any type of radioactive element they can obtain.


    I sighed. I didn¡¯t want to get involved with looters or squatters or radbees. I just wanted to make the planet whole and green again. I reported the radbees to the interplanetary defense council for them to address the matter.


    Gnomes are environmental designers and horticulturists, not warriors, so I didn¡¯t get involved in the battles to drive off the radbee intruders. I temporarily transitioned to another planet until RW12 was secured. I spent that time planning and researching how to manage the reclamation.


    Once back on-planet, I was ready to go.


    My group of renewal gnomes called ourselves 12ers. The RW12 project was so extensive and lasted for so long that when one of us said ¡°I¡¯m a 12er,¡± our occupation was instantly recognizable across gnome societies.


    The process to bring the planet back to a living entity took thousands of years, but it started with our first and most important action: determining the microbes necessary to renew the soil. Our laboratories created mixes of radiation-eating and earth-enriching microbes. These microorganisms cut many years off the time it would have taken for us to re-establish RW12.


    We planted the most radiation tolerant plants available and even created new varieties. You can¡¯t imagine our joy at the first tiny shoots that emerged from the replenished earth. Algae and water plants grew at the edges of newly created ponds and lakes. Mosses and tiny plants filled in across the planet¡¯s surface.


    Gradually we were able to add plants and finally trees. RW12 started to resemble a healthy planet instead of a planet recovering from devastation.


    Some plants started to grow that we hadn¡¯t planted, which is always startling. Greenery could develop from seeds that are still viable even after a nuclear blast. Or spores might have come to the planet inside a meteor. Our policy is to allow these random interlopers to sprout if they are compatible with the existing biome. We don¡¯t encourage or discourage them, they have to survive on their own. Our gnome reclamation group always gets excited if these random plants manage to endure on the planet we are reclaiming.


    After plant life became successful on RW12, we reintroduced insects, birds and animals. This is a very exciting time since it means reclamation is ending and the beginning of a self-sustaining planet is finally happening.


    RW12 followed our reclamation plan nicely. Workers were able to progress from spacesuits and special breathing gear to wearing normal clothes and breathing in clean, oxygenated atmosphere.


    At this point our group of 12ers paused. We had reached every goal set before us. Most team members moved on to their next planetary assignments. A small maintenance staff was set into place on RW12, responsible for upkeep instead of transformation.


    For a while, it seemed like the various councils could not agree on who got to live on the now beautiful little planet. Happily, someone had the brilliant idea to set up RW12 as a vacation planet during its transition time. The management team was phenomenally successful in offering safaris, bird watching, environmental tours and yoga retreats.


    I had moved on to another project, but eventually found out RW12 had become a permanent vacation planet. Its name was appropriately changed to Bellita, which means beautiful in several major intergalactic languages.


    Bellita¡¯s happy outcome was a relief to me. I always hesitate to check up on completed reclamation work because seeing how a planet is being treated by its new residents is often disappointing and too painful to bear. Instead, the assignment ended with excellent news for Bellita.


    I had my own excellent news, too. Since that project had gone so well, I was able to work my way into less distressing and more prestigious work groups. As I gained experience, I eventually managed to make my way into some fascinating terraforming assignments.

 Chapter 10: Gnomy loves terraforming

    For a gnome, there is nothing else like the thrill of terraforming rocky world planets.


    Terraforming is the art of transforming newly created planets, which consist of mostly barren rock expanses, into green and living landscapes. Entire ecosystems can be formed using basic organic materials, that is, if you know what you¡¯re doing.


    Gnomes are almost always involved in terraforming projects. It¡¯s one of our specialties and one of our favorite job placements.


    You might be surprised to know that ever since the troublesome but instructive start to planet Earth, almost all rock-based planets are terraformed using what is called the rocky world template. The template is really just a set of standardized and easy-to-follow instructions that follow the same procedures that eventually led to success on Earth.


    The template is for modern plants in a modern world, not dinosaurs in a prehistoric world. The creator gods have realized that worlds populated with huge plants and reptiles are a dead end. Gigantic reptiles fill evolutionary niches, but they never advance beyond the most rudimentary levels. The beasts are so finely tuned for their tropical worlds that any climate change means catastrophe. Dinosaur worlds are no longer designed, created or supported.


    These days, using the rocky world template as a guide, planets move rather quickly from freshly created empty worlds to paradises filled with modern flora and fauna. The rocky world template instructions are easy to scale up or down, depending upon planet size.


    I am always astonished to see how similar every rocky planet appears when it starts out. This actually makes sense since there are a limited number of basic rock types that can be created on a new planet. It does vary a bit, depending on the basic elements available in a solar system and the unique debris from meteors crashing on the developing planet.


    The terraforming procedure is also very much the same on every rocky world. Standard animal species and plant varieties are scheduled, delivered and maintained. It¡¯s the inevitable evolution that provides an interesting throw of the dice. Variations are watched closely as planets and animals uniquely adapt to each planet, often surprisingly fast.


    Interestingly, life on the smallest worlds always evolves to be especially beautiful. Birds and animals are vividly patterned with intense colorations. Every living thing seems to have a brighter essence. These small planets are like exquisite jewels, each one more colorful and unique than the last. Visiting any of them is a sensory delight.


    You may not realize that humans have been upgraded since Earth was created. This is not due to evolution. The creator gods have merely downloaded some subtle new instructions into human souls. The people on every planet have been guided to be less aggressive and more appreciative of the rare and fragile planets they have been given. Taking care of each planet has become a higher priority.


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    Humans merely need to look around the universes to see any number of ruined worlds that serve as examples of how easily civilizations can be destroyed and how long reclaiming a ruined planet takes.


    Across the universes, everyone agrees that the new humans are preferable to the old-style warlike and unappreciative humans.


    Finally, the terraform designers have not forgotten to look up into the evening skies. The rocky world template instructions require at least one moon to orbit around each terraformed planet. This requirement goes back to the original Earth design experience.


    Earth¡¯s single large moon was towed into place many millions of years ago in order to stabilize ocean tides and weather. Viewing that moon on warm summer nights has become a standard experience for humans and inspired countless attempts at poetry and romance. The moon¡¯s unexpected allure has made it so popular with earthlings that adding a moon has become standard.


    The creator gods don¡¯t like to admit it, but a moon is not just a beloved addition for inhabitants. It is also an inconspicuous and inexpensive viewing base to track the planet. After a planet is terraformed it is only occasionally visited by the creator group and their assistants. However, it is continuously spied upon by extraterrestrials living in moon bases. Moons are essential as observational bases to follow how a planet¡¯s population is progressing.


    A moon is also the first destination that civilizations visit when they finally travel outside of their own atmosphere. This results in astronauts being shocked to discover extraterrestrial researchers living on the moon in plain sight.


    The unexpected alien visitors may have been there for thousands or millions of years. When they are discovered, the space beings explain that they have no plans for removing themselves from their lunar observation posts. Intergalactic observers are an agreed-upon part of the maintenance portion of the terraforming contract. Terms were agreed upon by the galactic supreme council eons ago.


    How a civilization handles the discovery that there really are aliens says a lot about how they will fare as part of the interstellar neighborhood. Fortunately, there are interplanetary groups that specialize in guiding governments and societies through this potentially destabilizing era. As always, civilizations are free to make their own decisions as long as they follow existing laws and procedures.


    Most humans do not realize there are small magical beings living on all rocky planets. These include beneficial beings like wood sprites, elves, leprechauns and fairies. These fairytale beings are not actually invited to live on new planets. They simply find out about marvelous new unpopulated territories opening up, and then populate them. They are usually welcome since they band together to keep out the occasional evil magical being.


    Gnomes are magical too, of course, but we arrive as part of the official terraforming group. As the planet matures, gnomes stay on as hidden caretakers. We often work with other small magical visitors who have moved in. After all, their goal of a healthy planet is the same as ours.


    After working on dozens of terraforming assignments, I can handle anything that¡¯s thrown my way. I¡¯ve nurtured all types of plants and wildlife. I can tend to any sick or injured being as needed. I have even developed strategies for working peacefully with both humanoids and magical beings.


    I can handle everything except ¡­ except when I finally come to a planet I can¡¯t bear to leave.

 Chapter 11: The story of how coffee came to be

    I¡¯m sure you¡¯ve noticed that my time on Earth had a big effect on me. I learned so much from my early assignments on that beautiful planet. I feel like I know the planet and the humans more than most intergalactic beings. I spent enough lifetimes there to experience many of the activities and advancements on the planet.


    There is one agreeable activity that I picked up while on Earth that I still enjoy, all these eons later. That small yet noteworthy pleasure is coffee.


    Ah yes, coffee.


    Which, of course, is an essential part of a coffee break, that daily respite that makes each morning go so much better.


    Let me tell you the rumor of how coffee came to be.


    The story is that God the great Creator of All personally designed coffee, intent on forming a beverage worthy of itself.


    The Creator was becoming weary in its imagining of an infinite number of universes. It lacked the inspiration necessary to design new varieties of, well, everything. It lacked the positive energy necessary to lavishly design each galaxy, each planet, and each separate ecosystem to its fullest capacity.


    The Creator of All was looking for something to revive its flagging enthusiasm for the project.


    In a flash of inspiration, the Creator designed first the heavenly coffee smell and then the divine coffee flavor.


    It turned out that coffee was just what the Creator needed. God was able to continue its cosmic work. In fact, after a few cups of coffee, God finished its most beautiful, abstract and impressive work yet: the Pillars of Creation. The vast region of the Pillars is a star nursery, where new stars constantly coalesce from simple gases and dust.


    Yes, just when we thought this universe seemed complete, an entirely new area became active. The Pillars¡¯ stars will be completed on a regular timeline throughout the next tens of millions of years.


    I¡¯ve heard that there are some cosmic surprises coming up for the design of these stars and their galaxies. Their final forms are still a secret, but there are rumors that the laws of physics will be altered for this region of the universe. The new cosmic laws will allow not just greater diversity in the final forms but also permit research over millions of years to truly understand the incredible possibilities of this dimension.


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    There are many ideas about what will happen. Perhaps there will be a wee alteration in the rules of magnetism? Or just a smidge of a change in gravity? Maybe a few new floating string particles? Or perhaps some new elements will be created in the Periodic Table. It¡¯s whispered that changes in tiny subatomic orbits will ever so slightly alter particles as we know them.


    Like I said, the changes are a secret but that won¡¯t stop every being throughout the universes from speculating. Of course, different rules will result in different life forms existing there, too. I can¡¯t wait to see what they look like.


    Anyway, the Supreme Being has said that the Pillars¡¯ designs could not have been achieved without coffee¡¯s help. And so, God the Creator of All saw that coffee was helpful and good, and sometimes just what was needed to get a project done. Coffee was added to the plethora of items considered excellent and necessary.


    However, that wasn¡¯t the end of the story for coffee.


    The creator gods, the cosmic deities who design most planets and living beings in the universes, were miffed that they never thought of coffee. These hedonistic gods were always looking for new taste sensations, so they took up the coffee habit. They enjoyed its flavor and vitality just as much as the Creator did.


    Ever practical in their pursuit of pleasure, the gods decided to change coffee from a heavenly miracle that was difficult to obtain, to an agricultural crop they could easily grow. They decided to grow coffee as a coffee bean, on a coffee bush.


    Earth was one of the early test worlds for the new coffee plant. It turned out that coffee grew marvelously on that planet.


    News of this drink called coffee circulated quickly. The gods and their heavenly sycophants excitedly spread the coffee habit, and indeed the actual coffee bush, to fashionable beings on many worlds.


    Soon, plain hot coffee was no longer good enough for these notables. Their one-upmanship led to the development of espressos and assorted coffee drinks like lattes and mochas. Next there was iced coffee, decaf coffee, and long discussions about best types of coffee beans to achieve the most subtle flavors. A huge assortment of expensive coffee roasting and brewing equipment was developed.


    The creator gods helped design some sweet treats to go with their trendy morning coffee breaks. There were long centuries of debate on which type of baked cookie was best, what type of fried dough was delicious enough, and was there a best type of cake to eat with coffee. The tastiest recipes for croissants and pastries were fervently debated. These discussions are still ongoing in many lofty circles.


    Ordinary beings around the universes tried coffee and liked it. Coffee became ubiquitous on almost every planet. In fact, Earthlings who get caught in stargates and accidentally transport across universes are always astonished to smell coffee as they wander through new worlds.


    Now I admit that this whole elaborate coffee creation story is just another bit of gossip in a cosmos full of rumors. Unfortunately, mere mortal beings like us will never be privy to the actual truth. You must admit that the complex and heavenly smell of coffee and its unique taste actually do exist across most universes, along with accompanying sweet treats. And how else could something so glorious, enjoyed by so many around the universes, have come into being?

 Chapter 12: The tale of how two goddesses rolled the dice and created a new animal

    Once upon a time long ago, the creator gods and goddesses decided to make Earth their home. They moved to the picturesque area that would one day become Greece. These gods built their palaces at the top of Mt. Olympus, on the peak of the greatest mountain in a region of majestic mountains.


    Zeus, who was the undisputed king of this divine pantheon and who delighted in the title of Lord of the Sky, loved the pure and lofty region. He built his throne there, in a sunny palace placed high above the clouds.


    Despite the heavenly location, the creator gods filled their time with earthly hedonistic pleasures. When they weren¡¯t capriciously interfering in the lives of humans or other beings, they spent their time eating ambrosia, drinking nectar and indulging heavily in consumption of wine and beer. This lack of moral inhibition and absence of good judgment led to many problems.


    One of those problems was a love of gambling.


    This preoccupation with games of chance seems odd since each god could surely have influenced the outcome of any betting games. Perhaps the real enjoyment was seeing how long they could endure disabling their powers of magic to make the games actually a gamble, not a foregone conclusion.


    The favorite betting game at that time, indulged in by both humans and gods, was throwing dice made from bone or clay.


    Now at this particular festival of Dionysia, the gods started celebrating the cultivation of grape vines early in the day. They kept their wine consumption at a high level throughout the day¡¯s rituals, processions and events. Even the normally thoughtful Artemis and Persephone had been overindulging with wine.


    They got the hilarious idea to create a new animal based on the whim of the dice.


    Artemis is the daughter of Zeus and is the protector of animals, so you would think she would know better. Persephone is the goddess of springtime and innocence, so again, you would think she would conduct herself in a more responsible manner.


    However, screaming with laughter, the two goddesses decided to randomly roll the dice three times and build an animal based on the traits that came up. And what an odd miscellaneous assemblage of traits came up.


    First, there was the bill and webbed feet of the duck. Second, the tail of a beaver. Third, the body and fur of the otter.


    Artemis and Persephone started their design work. They threw in a few extra odd animal traits, just for more of a challenge. They decided the animal should lay eggs, instead of giving live birth like almost all other mammals. It would dive and swim in the water, instead of just floating on top of the water.


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    The two goddesses added a few more unusual ideas just for fun. The animal would have no stomach so it had to eat all day long. The animal would be small to make it look less threatening yet have spurs on its back feet filled with deadly venom. Finally, they came up with the funniest name they could devise and called the new animal a platypus.


    Although their creative skills were distorted by alcohol, their enthusiasm was not. By the end of their work session, they had come up with a platypus test design.


    Falling over each other with hilarity, Artemis and Persephone went to Zeus and asked if they could keep what they had invented. Despite their general silliness and drunken mood, they knew that they had to ask Zeus about adding a new animal to the collection of mammals. Zeus was the principal god, so what he decreed as acceptable is what would be allowed.


    Zeus took a long look at the animal, then looked at the goddesses. He decided he would rather deal with putting a platypus on Earth than deal with the ill humors of two inebriated deities, so he agreed that they may keep the platypus.


    There were several requirements, though. First, the animal was not a plaything, meaning it must be given enough agility to allow it to survive. He also decreed that the animal must be confined to Australia, where developing humans were used to strange and dangerous creatures. The goddesses agreed.


    Artemis and Persephone woke up the next morning and nursed their hangovers. They had completely forgotten about their casual throw-of-the-dice animal design. However, Zeus insisted that they redesign and complete their platypus animal project.


    After strong coffee and much grumbling, the two friends realized that their creative design session had resulted in a very poorly planned prototype. They consulted other gods and goddesses to help in overcoming the many design flaws. After much derision and scolding directed at the two goddesses, the group went to work. They reshaped the platypus animal until it was finally functional.


    The entire pantheon of gods gathered to celebrate the special animal and view its release into the outback. It¡¯s true the deities spend too much time drinking wine and gambling, but they were good at their jobs when they needed to be. They were proud that their combined ingenuity had saved the platypus design.


    To be honest, there has been much astonishment that the thrown-together platypus still survives through millennia. It has turned out to be a very hardy animal, needing only small, occasional design modifications.


    Artemis and Persephone get together once every million years or so to lead what they call a celebration of the platypus. It is in reality a celebration to rejoice at how well what had seemed like poor design actually turned into an incredibly clever project.


    The platypus has been an unexpected hit here on Earth. Humans can¡¯t seem to get enough of the quirky little beast. Australians, who are excellent at coming up with their own reasons for a party, spend an entire month celebrating the mysteries of the platypus every year. The platypus, and the celebration of the platypus, are a permanent part of the planet. One could even say that the platypuses lived happily ever after.

 Chapter 13: Gnomy starts his new job on Zelen and meets the fairies

    I can¡¯t express how excited I was to finally nab a work assignment that held promise to become a long-term success.


    The job opening was on planet Zelen. The gnome that had been there decided she was more interested in becoming a chemist and had moved on to researching giant gas worlds. Just the thought of falling into those crushingly heavy, yet bottomless planets gave me nightmares. I thought she was crazy to give up a new and pristine assignment like Zelen, but that was just good luck for me.


    Zelen was so early in its development that it was very similar to my memories of the Garden of Eden on planet Earth. It was located far across the universe from Earth, but otherwise there was little physical difference. The entire Round Woods felt familiar and comfortable to me from the first day. This made sense since I later learned that Zelen¡¯s topography was designed using the rocky world template that had been perfected on Earth.


    No wonder I was hired on Zelen, and also no surprise that I felt at home immediately.


    At that time the planet was still in the middle stages of terraforming. Even at this point Zelen contained familiar climates: forested mountains to the north, plains and deserts to the west and tropical warmth to the south. To the east, grassy plains turned into windswept sand dunes before ending at a briny ocean.


    Best of all, Zelen already contained numerous caretaking resident gnomes, so I would not be alone or have overwhelming responsibilities. With such diversity in the planet¡¯s topography and also gnomish neighbors to meet, it wasn¡¯t a planet where a gnome could be easily bored.


    The specific area referenced in the job posting was called the Round Woods. The Woods got its name because it covers a large but roughly round expanse. I often call the Round Woods a garden, but it is actually a huge, stunningly beautiful realm of rolling hills, ancient forests, open meadows, luxurious fern lowlands and shadowy swamps. There are a wide variety of animals taking advantage of its excellent living conditions. The Round Woods has four seasons, but winters are short and kindly to the animals and plants.


    My first day was very exciting. I transported onto Zelen and all of the gnomes and fairies from every sector of the planet were waiting to meet me. Each zone had its own gnome, nine in total. We would all work independently but meet for planning sessions and occasional projects, and of course to socialize.


    I¡¯m not sure if you¡¯ve ever been met by an entire meadow full of magical beings, but it was quite a lot for this young gnome to take in. Magical beings don¡¯t just shake hands and chat. They probe deeply into your psyche. They are prying into your motivations, your strengths, your weaknesses. Depending on the type of being, they can read your thoughts. It would be rude of me to probe them just as deeply, but at least it was acceptable for me to shield my most personal thoughts from their scrutiny.


    We spent that first day observing and interacting with each other to get a sense of how I could add to the team. Even the planet itself was evaluating me and passing judgement. I did have an earnest desire to do well in my new job, so apparently that came across to everyone. I was accepted as a valuable member of the group.


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    I would work most closely with two gnomes: Ondoe and Rau¡¯u.


    Ondoe was working to the west of me, in the plains and dry desert areas. He told me he loves the solitude of open, windswept areas. Ondoe was not only a xeriscape landscape expert but also an artist and sculptor. We struck up a strong friendship and I often help him build some of his larger sculptures.


    Rau¡¯u is the gnome who takes care of the eastern seashore. As it turns out, the flat, open area where ocean meets beach meets sky allows her to observe anybody who travels there. She has been a great resource and a wise friend. And just to note, since humanoids get only glimpses of us before we disappear into shrubbery, they tend to think every gnome is male. In fact, gnomes can be male or female. Our personalities vary a lot, but that is not associated with gender.


    Gnomes walk softly and inconspicuously among the landscape. We labor conscientiously all day long, willingly spending our lives tending to the animals and plants in our care. On rare occasions we present ourselves as ferocious bears or similar frightening animals, but that is only to chase away danger. I admit that pretending to be a wild beast is a lot of fun, but it would be too attention-getting to indulge myself often.


    There were many other beings, both magical and non-magical, to meet on that first day. In particular, there was a special type of being living in the Round Woods that I had never met before: the fairies.


    Of course, I had heard of fairies and knew a bit about them. Fairies and gnomes are both a part of the light of the creator, so we had that much in common. But our energies are expressed in such different behaviors that we are almost opposite in nature. However, opposites can complement each other in the best way.


    I was a bit shy meeting the fairies since I was so unfamiliar with them.


    Fairies fly freely and rarely concern themselves with being unnoticeable. On Zelen their chosen size is a bit larger than dragonflies. They are just as silvery in appearance as dragonflies but much faster. Their wings make light buzzing noises as they soar along, and they are so nimble that they are out of sight almost before humanoid eyes register that they¡¯ve even perceived them.


    The fairies in the Round Woods have a feminine energy, and when they allow themselves to be seen, present themselves as female. They chitter and chirrup amongst themselves all day long. Their talk sounded like random birdlike noises to me on that first day, but I was so mistaken. I had a lot to learn.


    A shared affection for caretaking the forests and meadows of a planet is what brings earth-loving gnomes into daily contact with high-flying fairies. We have the same interests in keeping a planet healthy and happy, so we have formed a strong alliance on many planets over the millions of years of our history.


    Phyler was the leader of the fairy group. I was simply hoping to form a good working relationship with the fairies, but in time Phyler and I became close friends. I often walked through the Round Woods with Phyler sitting on my shoulder, chatting and gossiping and planning what needed to be done next.


    Looking back, I had no idea we would all become such close friends. Together we established a strong community over many years and many lifetimes. We bonded through good times and bad.


    I came to love my corner of the universe so much that eventually I decided to keep it as my permanent home. I revised my name to officially declare that I was done with temporary jobs and long-term assignments. I would not willingly leave Zelen for another world.


    As we do in gnome culture, I changed my name to reflect my work status. I became not just Eden, but Eden of the Round Woods.

 Chapter 14: Phyler schools Gnomy about Zelen鈥檚 fairies

    Unfortunately, when I first met the local fairies I thought they were very much like large silver dragonflies. The fairies buzzed around people¡¯s heads with annoyingly erratic flights and torrents of endless chatter. As a grounded gnome with no wings, I just didn¡¯t get it.


    It didn¡¯t take long for Phyler to realize that I thought of fairies as big insects. She didn¡¯t hide her annoyance. A magical being of light can¡¯t really smack another magical being on the forehead when they are annoyed at their stupidity; that would be a breach of decorum. Instead, Phyler merely buzzed her wings in annoyance and proceeded to tutor this ignorant gnome.


    Oh my stars and planets, did I learn a lot.


    I didn''t know that the primary work of any group of fairies is to guard rocky worlds against dark forces. Fairies are the first line of defense and bear primary responsibility for protecting the safety of any planet in their assigned security area.


    Fairies are tuned to the nuances of the universe and are able to see alterations to its subtle forces. They can see the ripples and distortions in the universe caused by twisted evil intentions. Very little gets past them.


    Gnomes work closely with fairies and get involved in planetary defenses too, but we are not planetary guardians. The primary role of gnomes is to care for plants and animals. However, we can also sense any abnormal energy around us. Gnomes notify the fairy group for their area and are part of the safety council that must decide how to handle any problems.


    Phyler explained that she is the leader of Zelen¡¯s fairies. She added that of course fairies prefer to give an air of indifference to outsiders. They show no interest in events happening outside of their own selfish activities so that visitors to the planet will relax, chat freely and casually reveal any transgressions. The real work is successfully presenting themselves as a clique of intellectually limited and continuously nattering fairies. The gossipmongering of fairies is an act, but their closeness and ability to work as a skilled team is not a pretense. They depend upon each other absolutely.


    Now that I have been on Zelen for quite a few millennia, I have seen skirmishes and even battles in the stratosphere above Zelen. Thanks to the skill of our fair folk, the humanoids and animals don¡¯t even realize a hostile encounter is going on right over their heads. Great clashes of energy are not very obvious to non-magical beings. Explosions caused by energy pulses or wild crashes of plasma ray cannons hitting spacecraft are interpreted as strong thunderstorms.


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    I can give you an example of how Zelen was saved from disaster.


    At the other end of our galaxy, a space freighter captain mentioned the rumor that there were huge swarms of self-replicating nano bots headed toward Zelen¡¯s cosmic neighborhood. These bots had long occupied the empty areas of the universe but had recently evolved into a single entity and started raiding planets.


    The rumor made its way to security forces at several space stations, who then informed the fairies. The fairies called a security meeting to inform the gnomes and other magical beings on Zelen.


    The nano bots were looking for rocky worlds to strip out minerals needed for their own reproduction. They would have removed every bit of quartz, potassium, bauxite and many other minerals on every planet. The nanoparticles were so tiny that they didn¡¯t need to drill into a planet. They simply needed to dive into each planet and pull single atoms of minerals until they accumulated all of it. The catastrophic earth changes would collapse entire planets and kill every living being.


    These bots had not been designed to be biological entities, they were simply tiny machines that were accidentally loosed into the universe by some ancient civilization. The civilization is long dead, but the havoc created by their inept technology has outlived them.


    This problem was swiftly handled by Zelen¡¯s fairy forces, set as watchers around our solar system¡¯s orbit. The swarm of nano bots was barely visible as a shiny metallic swarm. The lookouts sensed the swarm more than saw it.


    Since the bots were not actually alive, there was no issue of whether they should be destroyed or not. The fairies simply set up a trail of tasty morsels, meaning highly desirable rare minerals. The bots followed the morsels from our 3D space to a different, empty dimension. The strange physical laws of that dimension might have destroyed the bots anyway, but the dimension was blasted with plasma until every single bot was demolished.  The operation was short, intense and successful.


    Phyler pointed out to me that this was just another effective operation on Zelen. Our local fairies function as a well-trained and alert security force. In fact, they have such a reputation that it alone keeps potential evildoers away.


    The fairies sort out the intentions of a huge variety of visitors: passing cloud beings or their cousins the water sprites; covert beings who have been moving within the earth; odd salamanders who bear a resemblance to dragons; malevolent energy forms hiding nearby; and they can even sense the flutter of angel wings stirring a breeze around them. All energies are evaluated and visitors are either welcomed or asked to leave.


    The fairies always know who is here in the moment, who has been here in the past, and even who will be stopping here soon. They frequently hear helpful gossip from their many contacts locally, in the universes, and in the astral realms. They understand that negative energy cannot be destroyed, but it can be deflected or neutralized or changed into something more positive.

 Chapter 15: Gnomy and Phyler strike a deal

    Gnomes and fairies don¡¯t normally have a close relationship because our personalities are so different. Gnomes are a reserved, plan-in-advance type of species. Unfortunately, we often lapse into extended silences while we slowly deliberate our strategies. Fairies are quick and intuitive and even their group discussions take only a moment. They can make decisions in an instant.


    Our natural vibrations are so different that on a personal level most gnomes and fairies have nothing to say to each other. Our two groups do mutually respect each other¡¯s capabilities when it comes to working together. We can communicate about our projects by telepathy as needed. However, the two groups have always led separate lives on Zelen and on most worlds.


    Phyler and I were the exception to the rule about having nothing in common. We gradually struck up a friendship after a few years of working together. We shared our knowledge of the Round Woods to broaden our understanding of the land.


    Phyler didn¡¯t indulge in idle chatter like some of the younger and more sophomoric fairies. Instead, she communicated in her quick little voice that reminded me of a tiny sweet-pitched bell. I would never be able to understand her rapid comments if I couldn¡¯t read her thoughts at the same time. Most likely Phyler wouldn¡¯t understand me without reading my thoughts, either, but we made it work.


    Our friendship was even more unusual in that we were so similar in our outlook on life. We seemed to be kindred spirits somehow. She called me ¡°Gnomy Gnome¡± instead of Eden, and I called her ¡°Dragonphyler¡± since she looked so much like a silvery dragonfly buzzing by.


    I learned that fairies are very sensitive to beings in pain. The dark auras from suffering disturb them greatly. Gnomes share this trait also, and this is one of the characteristics that helped us understand each other.


    I taught Phyler plant and animal information, and she got me up to speed on who was important in our solar system and how they fit into our local web of life. Sometimes we would discuss issues or pass along news about fairies and gnomes.


    Phyler started tagging along with me on my daily treks through the Round Woods, as I was checking up on things and looking for any ripples in local energy fields. Phyler would rest on my shoulder and direct me to whatever problems she had sensed on her daily flights looking over the Woods.


    One damp and chilly spring day, Phyler and I realized a big difference between gnomes and fairies: gnomes hate rain. Fairies love rain.


    Gnomes hate getting wet and we hate being chilly after a day in the rain. A waterproof rain hat and coat keep most of the water off of our clothes, but within a few hours the rain drips down our hats onto our eyebrows and noses. Even worse, the moisture trickles down our necks and backs and chests. Our beards act like vast sponges and hold large amounts of water. Every so often we have to pick up our beards and squeeze out the torrents of water. A wet gnome is an unhappy gnome.


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    Now I don¡¯t like rainy days, but I used to enjoy watching Phyler patrol the Round Woods in the rain. Phyler loved being in the rain. Phyler simply cast a silvery glow around herself to keep the raindrops off, and away she flew. Phyler dipped one hand out of her waterproof glow every now and then, just to feel the rain on her skin.


    I preferred to sit on my covered porch during rainstorms, listening to the showers while looking out on the peaceful meadows sloping toward the Long Lake. This was the time that I used to carve oak or cherry branches previously gathered from the woodlands. I mostly shaped gardening tools or kitchen items, small useful items that I would take home to Jaal, my wife.


    Every gnome wife is proud of her collection of handmade items carved by family members. The collection often includes special, complex objects carved by parents, grandparents or other relatives. These prized heirlooms are passed down through the centuries and generations. But even a gnome wife has to admit that there can be too much of a good thing.


    I had become a bit bored with my overabundance of workaday practical carvings, and also had absentmindedly noticed that the fairies had few belongings in their bright and airy cavern grotto. Apparently carving isn¡¯t a skill the fairies care to master. It makes sense that fairies don¡¯t enjoy the planning and concentration required to carve wood. Those skills don¡¯t mesh with their quicksilver thoughts and role of being guardians of Zelen.


    Hmmm¡­Instead of tramping around out in the rain looking for problems, I prefer to be at home carving. Instead of sitting at home during cloudbursts, fairies prefer to take flight. As it came time for me to set aside my carving and get ready for my damp walk through the woods, these two thoughts came together.


    Oh Dragonphyler! I called out to her. How would you like to furnish your empty cavern?


    I quickly thought out loud. Would you like to receive new bowls for your guests and spoons for their stews? Maybe some decorations for your walls? Or even bead necklaces to imbue with fairy magic and give as gifts? Or mushroom-shaped stools, from fairy sizes to bear sizes. Or maybe even a few substantial chairs for visitors who enjoy extra comfort or need to be the center of attention.


    Phyler slowed down at hearing my words, then circled back. Soon we were in solid negotiations.


    We finally agreed that Phyler would take over rainy day security patrols for me. In return, I would spend that time carving items for the fairies.


    Our terms decided, we both moved into our new roles. Since I am always happy to find more time to carve and Phyler is equally happy to find more reasons to fly in the rain, the arrangement has been a great success.


    Incidentally, as news of our successful little bargain hit the local gossip circles, I thought this type of arrangement between fairies and gnomes might become popular. It seemed like a perfect solution to stop gnomic grumbling about going out in the rain, plus solved a furnishing issue common to fairies across many worlds. Then, inevitably, cross-species friendships would develop from there.


    Unfortunately, the concept never took off on Zelen, or on any other planet for that matter. It was sad that our two groups couldn¡¯t even bond over something as useful as this type of collaboration. As they say, ancient habits die hard. I guess what our two species really have most in common is the ability to avoid change.

 Chapter 16: Gifts from the portal lands

    There is a strange place on planet Zelen, far to the west of the Round Woods, located just where the dry plains of the desert lands start. The mountains with towering firs and clear running streams have ended and the landscape has flattened into dry, windswept plains.


    Empty prairies of cracked earth and occasional rustling grasses have replaced the lush landscape. Some small animals thrive in that harsh desert world. Humans are not acclimated and do not try to survive there. This lack of population has turned out to be a blessing due to a problem specific to these badlands.


    The problem is that strange items randomly crash down from the heavens.


    It seems there is a portal that opens and drops items into this area. There is no rhyme or reason to the miscellany that falls through this portal. The stuff just falls and clutters up our pristine lands.


    Our theory is that the portal extends through many universes. Its edges must be unstable so that it swings around and pulls in items from many worlds and many time periods.


    The odd graveyard of curious and unwanted items fills up slowly but regularly. A group of us planet dwellers who value a tidy and natural look get together once in a while to clear out the junk. We simply fling the unwanted items out into space towards our sun.


    But before we start flinging, our primitive hoarder instincts kick in. Before our grand housecleaning begins, we give the debris field a good going-over to see what bounty we would like to pick up and move into our own domains.


    Rau¡¯u, the gnome who cares for the eastern seashore, has taken home many items. She has been able to repair and use small boats, oars, buoys and even some life preservers and colorful beach toys.


    She has passed along to the mermaid queen some colorful glass marbles to decorate rocky ocean caves. The swirled hues are marvelous to behold. Their shifting shadows bring rippled light into dark ocean hollows.


    The fairies have an ever-growing assortment of items for their guests. Their high cavern walls are decorated with paintings and tapestries. There are even tablecloths, silverware and place settings for the odd assortment of slightly damaged dining room tables.


    I rarely take anything home since my needs are few. I did pick up some clay pots that had crashed into a shallow lake. They were well-packaged, so not badly damaged. They are useful for ferns and other plants that I like to start and transplant. Some handy shovels and buckets have made their way into my forest workshop, too.


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    Phyler has a great sense of humor so you can imagine the fun she has had gifting her friends with strange and unlikely objects, tucked into odd places for us to find at the most inconvenient times. We have learned to tread carefully and not startle too badly at the pranks she has set up for us.


    The manna from the skies inspired her to a legendary height of prankersterism: Phyler decided to surprise me with a particular item she found in the portal lands. But ¡°prank¡± is a bit of an understatement. It was a complex and well-coordinated surprise that we all enjoyed a lot.


    First, Phyler had a magpie fly by me and caw at me, telling me to come to the main meadow quickly. There was something strange there that I needed to see. I hurried over, concerned.


    I was even more worried when I came upon an entire crowd of gnomes, fairies and local animals waiting for me in the middle of the grassy area. The Grove of the Ancients is located along the edge of that meadow, so all of the massive and serious-looking primeval trees also had their attention turned to the meadow.


    The residents who were not permanently bound to the earth stepped aside and made a path for me. I couldn¡¯t imagine what was going on, but became aware of suppressed grins and small giggles.


    As I headed up the rise to the top of the meadow, I suddenly saw a plaster gnome in the very center of its intersecting paths. I just stopped and stared at it. It looked like me! The gnome¡¯s clothes were very similar to mine, but it had the tall red hat that I coveted so much and was working hard to earn.


    Not only was there a statue of me, but it was raised up on a Roman column so everybody walking through the open area could see it.


    I had to stop and stare for a bit. Phyler flew over and landed on my shoulder. She told me that a group of local beings who were cleaning the portal lands had found the gnome statue. It had been only lightly damaged, so they fixed and painted it, then hid it until they could transport it here as a surprise. The column had crashed down just as they were ready to leave. Everyone agreed it was perfect as a base for the statue.


    Now I am a rather serious gnome, so when I came upon this short gnome on top of a tall column, with its bright red hat and holding a basket of cheerful flowers, I stopped in my tracks. My mouth fell open. Everyone paused to see my reaction.


    I started to laugh. I laughed and laughed. It struck me as the funniest thing I¡¯d seen in many lifetimes.


    We all enjoyed the joke that day. I was touched by the effort that went into the lighthearted presentation and accompanying party.


    Plus, I really enjoyed seeing myself on top of a column more than I care to admit.


    It¡¯s been over 200 years, and the gnome statue is still there. Phyler and friends give it a new coat of paint every now and then to keep it bright and attractive. It is now the center of a series of gardens and gives a focus to the many plantings that radiate out from it.


    The story has become a legend throughout the solar system. When contemplating a practical joke, the question is always asked, ¡°But can it beat a surprise party to present a statue of a gnome on top of a column in the middle of a meadow?¡± The answer is always no, and a great many annoying jokesters have had wiser thoughts and skipped their pranks. At least, they skip the mischief until they can check out what¡¯s crashed down lately in the portal lands.

 Chapter 17: About the fairies and their famous parties

    You would think that the fairies must have very luxurious abodes in which to hold their many parties and celebrations, but you would be wrong. As beings of light, they have no need of soft surfaces or beautiful fabrics. They carry vibrancy from the creation of the cosmos deep within themselves. The mesmerizing colors stream out, shimmering upon their silvery wings. The fairies hold their own celestial light; they have no need of further decoration.


    Their home on Zelen is a large, light-filled cavern with a plain but inviting ambience. This enchanted location is known as the Grotto of the Fairies. It has a kind of Bohemian flair, with its mismatched furnishings and combinations of hand carved wooden items mixed amongst salvaged tableware. The space is always pleasantly warm or delightfully cool, depending on the season.


    At night, the overall glow of the Grotto combines with the glow of visiting fireflies, who circulate among the guests to add to the soft cavern glow. Lovely harp and flute harmonies weave around each other to further charm the guests.


    All the major VIP luminaries from throughout the galaxies have stopped in for a visit at some point. Besides getting to meet actual fairies, the unspoiled, spectacular view of land and shimmering ocean is its own draw.


    Sometimes the flying creatures of the night, like moths and bats, join the fairies in their nocturnal festivities. If I am patrolling the area I can hear the little squeaks and wing flutters of small creatures joining the celebration. The night beings come just to the edge of the lighted area to watch and wonder at the ethereal fairies, before darting off into the darkness again.


    In fact, all types of wanderers are invited to visit the fairies. It is an easy matter for a magical being, or a technological being in a spaceship, to quickly travel through time and space to get to the Grotto.


    There is much conversation and camaraderie from the various guests. The multitude of languages and intergalactic news from outside our planet are a counterpoint to local, familiar voices. During these gatherings there is much joy and many songs. It¡¯s true that some of the words and verses are expressed through thought alone, but a song is a song no matter how it is sung.


    The brilliant evenings are legendary, and it is a great honor to receive an invitation to attend a celebration at the Grotto of the Fairies. If the visitors¡¯ vibrations are compatible, they will have an evening of festivity they will remember forever. If a visitor¡¯s vibrations are not compatible, they must have been invited simply to overhear their chatter. Otherwise, beings of questionable character simply would not be requested to attend, nor could they see or hear the fairies or their guests. In fact, the Grotto itself would be invisible to them. So sad for them if they cannot partake of the enjoyment.


    Now remembering that fairies are guardians of Zelen, do you imagine that these parties are held simply to satisfy the fairies¡¯ need for fun and companionship? No, indeed.


    In actuality, the fairies like to host a variety of beings so they can find out what is going on in the galaxy. Who is in, who is out. Who is selling, who is buying. Which governments are stable, which regimes are on their way out. Who is dealing, who is double dealing. Who was triple dealing and has suddenly disappeared from view.


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    Fairies use their lovely appearances and enchanting personalities to discover plots being devised against a multitude of beings, governments, planets, or entire galaxies.


    It¡¯s not that the fairies are being dishonest. They don¡¯t use any extra magic to lure in travelers. The fairies simply present themselves as delightful party organizers and servers, usually human-sized so they can be at the same eye level as most of the guests. It¡¯s not their fault that visiting beings assume that fairies are merely gracious and na?ve hostesses who revel in parties and wouldn¡¯t know an evil plot if it was thrown in their faces. The schemers can only blame themselves for indulging in foolish, revealing chatter. The fairies merely provide refreshments and listen well.


    One evening Phyler and I managed to strategize quickly and work together to avoid a catastrophe. On that particular evening, Phyler had been acting as bartender. She was mixing drinks for a small group of Cernaian scouts. Naturally the group became loud and boisterous, and discussed their plans to search the skies around our planet Zelen for their rival group, the Betomits.


    The Betomits are a powerful, dominant civilization in competition with the smaller but more technically advanced neighboring Cernaians. Phyler called me over to figure out our plan. If this wasn¡¯t handled correctly, the Betomits and Cernaians might start a skirmish. On top of starting an intergalactic incident, the combatants might decide that Zelen was worthy plunder and decide to claim ownership. After all, what better way to compare manliness and military superiority after a few drinks than to use the planet they were standing on, which belonged to neither group, as a battlefield.


    Phyler and I decided to work together: I would cast an uneasy, menacing feeling in the Cernaian minds, so they would feel they would lose badly if they started any fights with the Betomits. I had lots of practice giving off menacing feelings to unpleasant humanoids who misbehave in the Round Woods, so I was very good at that particular task.


    Phyler would set up an electronic device that simulated Betomit warship tones, suggesting that the ships were hidden nearby with their distinctive resonance signatures imperfectly muted. The ships didn¡¯t actually exist but sensors could be fooled with the almost-but-not-quite concealed vibrations.


    Fortunately, the Cernaians were merely a small party in a lightly armed ship. The Cernaian sensors were indeed fooled by the decoy energy patterns. The scouts became uncomfortable thinking there was a warship full of aggressive Betomits nearby. With my help manipulating their minds, their anxiety and fear almost drove them mad. The Cernaians quit the planet quickly and completely.


    It was a good charade and both Phyler and I were relieved it worked. If the menacing Cernaians and Betomits ever decided to come back to the Fairy Grotto, they would find themselves unable to locate it. In fact, they would become forgetful and confused at the mere thought of returning to Zelen. The same menacing fear, generated by me, would paralyze both groups. They could never return.


    I even took the liberty of planting a small subliminal thought into the Cernaian spaceship¡¯s consciousness, merely noting that it would be a good thing if the two worlds stopped fighting. That thought may just possibly be shared with other spaceships in the fleet and eventually reach those stubborn humanoid neighbors.


    Both Phyler and I were delighted by what we achieved working together. If a little planning and ingenuity could stop a hostile action and keep the guests from disrupting a brilliant party, we were all for it.

 Chapter 18: Phyler and Gnomy protect Zelen again鈥?nd again

    I am proud to say that sometimes I can assist Phyler and the fairies in their security operations. I guess Phyler thinks that if I¡¯m such a nosy busybody that I want to know everything happening in the Round Woods, I might as well get involved with it, too.


    But of course, I do need to know everything. The Round Woods is my area of responsibility. And besides, getting involved in the defense of Zelen is always a lot of fun.


    My defensive specialty is communicating with birds, bats, animals and trees. I can telepathically ask if they have sensed any unusual vibrations that could mean trouble. They are surprisingly astute at noticing subtle changes and are very conscientious in relaying information to me.


    One of Zelen¡¯s biggest advantages is that would-be criminals always underestimate the capabilities of our tiny yet ferocious fairies. The fairies choose to present themselves as harmless and almost doll-like beings. Intruders forget that fairies can change into any species and size they like.


    Criminals often assume that a lightly populated planet like Zelen is an easy mark, with too few residents to defend itself properly. The fairies actually have access to plenty of resources, like warships and an army of magical beings from around the universes. All of these defenders can be at Zelen in an instant.


    The same criminal schemes keep coming up again and again throughout the universes. Thieves constantly want to invade planets, including Zelen, to steal things like precious metals, rare plants or even valuable animals. Unbelievably, they sometimes try to grow plants on Zelen that are illegal on their own worlds. The ideas abound, fortunately the proficiency in attainment is lacking.


    The fairies often overhear these plans at their evening gatherings. These nightly parties are an effective backup strategy in case criminals manage to evade other spying and monitoring activities. If one information gathering technique fails, it¡¯s good to have other options. Otherwise we would not know about a scheme until, for instance, we felt the vibrations from mining machines below our feet.


    The mining thieves usually try smash and grab raids, not full-scale mining operations. Still, unauthorized miners are difficult to evict if they decide to burrow underground. We have helped other worlds remove these foul criminals; those worlds have helped us too. Fortunately, plasma ray guns are effective in destroying anything, if we work on it long enough.


    One time the fairies foiled a very strange plot. A group of so-called scientists planned to experiment with technology designed to completely extinguish the sun from a solar system. All of its planets would go cold and dark, never to recover. Possibly the technology wouldn¡¯t have worked, but they were stopped by Zelen¡¯s fairies before they could even try. The scientists are now explaining their actions before a regional court.


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    And this last example was a terrifying d¨¦j¨¤ vu for me.


    A large asteroid was detected heading directly for Zelen and the Round Woods. It was almost as large as the meteor that destroyed the dinosaurs on Earth, and would have been very damaging.


    No one wanted another high-profile catastrophic event, so our local security council got all councils throughout the quadrant involved. A high-speed neural link was established for quick communication.


    And to no one¡¯s surprise, due to the size of the asteroid and how quickly it would reach Zelen, the council members decided that the powerful creator gods were the right group to take care of the problem. They just needed to nudge the asteroid ever so slightly off course. It was a simple matter for them.


    Gnomes rarely have contact with any of the creator gods once a planet is done being terraformed, but this was an emergency. I volunteered since I had some past acquaintance with Zeus and the pantheon of gods. I had been courageous enough to tell them how angry I was about Earth and its destruction all those years ago, so perhaps that past bravery would be seen as a positive. I was very anxious about the situation but someone had to do it.


    Now there was an unexpected problem. The creator gods were impossible to reach. None of the assembled beings, even council heads, could get past their executive assistants, who functioned as gatekeeping snobs. The creator gods have the same arrogant, power-wielding sycophants as any other high-status group who enjoys showing off power by restricting access. The assistants were like a brick wall between us and the gods.


    In desperation, I finally transported unexpectedly and appeared in front of the creator gods during one of their regular meetings. I refused to leave until I showed them a holographic projection of what would happen if no action was taken.


    I knew I risked their wrath and was sure I¡¯d be in their bad graces for millennia after that audacious stunt. But I figured they owed some leeway for almost wiping me out when that asteroid hit Earth.


    Finally Zeus waved his hand and the asteroid deflection was done. No other planets would be affected, and the asteroid would eventually disintegrate harmlessly in a faraway sun.


    I heaved a sigh of relief and babbled my profound thanks until Zeus pushed me to leave the room. And when I say pushed, he mentally pushed me until I left. Being psychically dragged out would have been the next step.


    The entire quadrant of our universe celebrated that evening. There were many heroes to thank for getting this important task completed.


    Surprisingly, I didn¡¯t get into trouble at all with the creator gods, just with the fragile egos of their assistants. Maybe Zeus felt the gods owed me? I certainly felt they did.


    No doubt Zeus felt all was even and they had repaid me for the mental anguish on Earth past. I don¡¯t think we¡¯re close to even yet, but I¡¯ll take what I can get.

 Chapter 19: Queen Sintilla and the Guardian Rose

    Phyler had been sending regular security updates to the fairies¡¯ home world detailing our successes in dealing with ongoing threats to Zelen. It turned out that Queen Sintilla, leader of the fairies, was reading all of these reports. She was very pleased by our cleverness and quick actions.


    The Queen decided to honor us with an award for working so well together in keeping Zelen trouble-free. Rau¡¯u and Ondoe and a few other gnomes occasionally coordinated with the fairies on security matters in their areas, so they were invited to attend, too. They were just as excited as I was.


    I think the Queen really just wanted to point out that gnomes and fairies could and should work together on every planet. We would all get better results by synchronizing our efforts instead of handling situations separately.


    Phyler could have gone to the fairies¡¯ home world to receive the honor. However, our group of gnomes of course couldn¡¯t go to the fairies¡¯ home planet, which is off limits to outsiders, and especially to males, and even more especially to gnomes. I appreciated the fairy queen Sintilla coming here so we could participate in the ceremony.


    We were excited to meet with the royal court on our planet Zelen, in our main meadow in the Round Woods. Very excited, yes, but it meant that we had to get to work preparing our meeting place for this upcoming royal event. We made lists of chores and set to work.


    I made the animals and fairies stay out of the meadow before Queen Sintilla¡¯s visit. The only magical beings allowed were junior fairies, who were put to work picking up fallen twigs and leaves. The only four-legged creatures allowed were rabbits, who helped trim the grass evenly. I myself took care of some light trimming of shrubbery and trees. We were all happy with the result.


    Queen Sintilla¡¯s spaceship arrived in orbit around Zelen. She and her courtiers took a large runabout to the planet surface and disembarked onto our now perfectly manicured meadow.


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    Upon introduction, I felt Queen Sintilla was very much a mind reader and excellent at quickly evaluating someone. I felt her riffling through my mind even as I completed a quick bow. Queen Sintilla could sense that there was no malice in my heart, and, though no mind reader, I could sense the same in her.


    Queen Sintilla thanked the gnomes for maintaining such a good relationship with Phyler and the local community of fairies. We all bowed low and expressed to her that we felt honored to work with such a special group of magical beings. The fairies worked hard and were quite effective in their role of protecting Zelen. And frankly, they were a joy to have around, with their sparkling personalities and lovely silvery wings in flight.


    I added that we must not forget to give credit to the wild animals of Zelen, who often volunteered to work as sentries during security incidents. Although they were not created as magical beings, years of being in contact with local magic has given them an enchanted spark. They are wise and can telepathically communicate with the gnomes or fairies when they have need.


    Queen Sintilla gifted Phyler and all of the beings on Zelen with a special rosebush. I was quite pleased at this lovely gesture, and equally pleased at the loveliness of the rosebush. The flower buds were a delicate yellow color tipped with lavender.


    Not only was the rose beautiful and unique, but it had a purpose. Phyler explained to me that the name of this rosebush was the Guardian Rose. When danger is coming the rose will change to a bright purple color and its fragrance will become strong and metallic. The plant also sets off a series of strong breezes, so that its windswept flowers can be noticed by whoever is walking by. Anyone in the area will be warned of trouble.


    Phyler and I were quite pleased with this thoughtful gift and its presentation. The fairies have such a vibrant energy that listening to them speak is always a pleasure. I enjoyed both their remarks and the small reception afterward, which allowed us to interact with the visiting fairies for a bit and enjoy their company. I was sorry when they left that day.


    I checked the rosebush to make sure it was still thriving. I noticed that the rose seemed a bit lonely, having only my statue and the huge old trees for company. That gave Phyler and me an idea on how to give the Guardian Rose a setting worthy of its rarity and uniqueness.

 Chapter 20: Phyler鈥檚 rose garden

    Phyler and I decided that we needed to plant a rose garden and make our newly gifted Guardian Rose the star of the garden. Knowing Phyler¡¯s fascination with all things of the genus Rosaceae, and admittedly quite fond of roses myself, I created an entire English style rose garden for us to enjoy. The obvious place for it was at the base of my shamelessly outsized gnome statue that rests high upon its Roman column.


    We all agreed we should go bold because, well, why not. We would enjoy a bright change from shady and serene forests. The rose garden is a bit formal with its tidy concentric rings spaced carefully around the statue. However, the roses do not consist of perfectly clipped and shaped, long-stemmed flowers. Instead, the tumbling masses of cheerful blooms serve as exuberant ornaments highlighting the huge, rambling, gorgeously full rosebushes.


    We planted a variety of roses with a profusion of colors, ranging from tiny white petals to large blooms of ginger tones to palettes of pinks, yellows, creams and lavenders. The red roses have an intense color and vibrancy of their own. Butterflies constantly surround all the blooms, adding even more to the loveliness.


    The roses know we admire them, so they make an extra effort to create blooms as big and colorful as possible, blooms as big as Phyler herself.


    We placed the Guardian Rose in its own special area, close to the Grove of the Ancients. The Grove is the most ancient forest on the planet with the largest, wisest and most treasured trees. They have acquired knowledge from the earth itself, through their deep roots and psychic connections to fellow Ancients all over the galaxy. They keep an ear to the ground, so to speak, and have a familiarity with current events, too. They were delighted to welcome the Rose.


    When the Ancients see the Guardian Rose change to its troubled purple color, they quickly notify ravens to pass along a message to Phyler or me, or to whoever is in charge for the day. The few times the trees did not notice the color change or the strong breezes, the butterflies smelled the alteration in aroma. They passed along the Rose¡¯s warning instead. Either way, the Guardian Rose has been helpful to us many times.


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    We named the garden, very simply, ¡°Phyler¡¯s rose garden.¡± We are quite pleased with the garden, but occasionally add new roses just for the fun of having even more beautiful blooms to enjoy.


    Phyler¡¯s entire flutter of fairies often stop by to visit the roses, lightly descending onto the colorful flowers. You have not lived until you¡¯ve seen an entire rose garden covered with fairies flitting through the air or lounging on soft petals, or sitting cross-legged almost hidden in the centers of the largest roses. The roses obviously like their visits since they nod and sway with enjoyment.


    Phyler¡¯s favorite flowers are roses, so the garden is extra special to her. She loves everything about roses, even the protective thorns which she gracefully manages to avoid. Phyler says she has always found roses quite easy to talk to and looks forward to a visit with them. The roses seem to have plenty to talk about. The high-pitched chitter chatter of fairies is fun to listen to, although as always I don¡¯t fully comprehend it. I was always best at simply understanding the roses¡¯ feeling of enjoying fairy visitors on a warm and sunny day.


    Phyler¡¯s rose garden gets a multitude of both local and off-world visitors due to its impressive roses. The energy and scent and shape of the roses is quite remarkable. It has even been mentioned on lists of sites to see within our solar system, along with our peaceful Long Lake.


    You have probably guessed that I can¡¯t resist starting my security presentations with holograms of beautiful Zelen scenery. I like to say that the images give the audience a better insight into the amazingly beautiful planet I am discussing, although secretly I just like looking at the pictures.


    Phyler and I have given talks at intergalactic council meetings, discussing our great success in finding ways for fairies and gnomes to work together to keep Zelen safe. We have been trying to encourage more cooperation between our two groups, even if only in security matters. There was some interest in our story but it didn¡¯t seem to lead to much action. We had to settle for writing up our adventures as an addition to the akashic records, where anyone could research the topic as desired.


    Fairies are immortal, if they care to be. Therefore, royalty is expected to step down from being in a position of power after 500 years or so. This is what Queen Sintilla has done, moving into an advisory role to the new queen. The former Queen Sintilla still stops by Zelen once in a while to see how the rose garden has changed and expanded. Phyler visits Sintilla at the royal court on occasion, both to discuss fairy business and as a loyal friend. I am always happy to bow and greet the former queen here in the Round Woods, or send my warm regards along with Phyler.

 Chapter 21: A walking trip to visit Rau鈥檜 and the mermaids

    Apart from Phyler, who was my best buddy in the Round Woods for a very long time, my closest friends are the gnomes working on all sides of me. I occasionally visit them and they stop by the Round Woods, too. We are a solitary species to an extent, but without strong supportive connections to other gnomes we get lonely.


    My favorite walking trip is a visit to see Rau¡¯u at the seashore. There is nothing like a relaxing outing to the ocean for resetting my mood. Not only do I enjoy the exercise, the distinctive scenery along the way and the Infinite Ocean itself, but Rau¡¯u is quite entertaining. She always has news of the latest gnome activities throughout the quadrant.


    While we are at the beach, we often visit some of the beings who live under the water. Today we are planning to visit the mermaid queen and her pod.


    As usual, Phyler accompanies me. We chat as I walk. Our conversations are mostly telepathic so it looks like I am silently, solemnly striding with a quicksilver fairy occasionally resting on my shoulder. Phyler has a hard time being inactive for long, so she tends to flit off frequently to investigate birds and plants along the way.


    My friend Rau¡¯u and the start of the Infinite Ocean are just a half day¡¯s walk straight east from the Round Woods, through a scenic, isolated area. I could just instantly transport to the edge of the ocean, but then I would miss getting to walk in that lovely area. The walk itself is an important part of the day¡¯s excursion. I enjoy feeling the sun on my face, greeting local inhabitants along the way, and exchanging news with occasional passing travelers.


    Rau¡¯u has a hand-built home, but it is not a typical gnomish stone cottage. She has cleverly constructed her home by tucking it into the side of a permanent sand dune. The structure is built from driftwood and lime cement, with decorative seashells pressed into the walls. It has large east-facing windows, a stout wooden door and a few magical spells to keep trespassers out. It suits her needs admirably and of course has a beautiful ocean view.


    And what a huge ocean it is. The Infinite Ocean gets its name from the legend that there is no bottom to this largest ocean on Zelen. Supposedly if you dove deep enough, you could just keep swimming and come up on the other side of the planet. There wouldn¡¯t even be rocky depths to pass through, just saltwater from one side to the other. With this theory, the only thing holding Zelen together is the increased gravity and water pressure at the center of the planet.


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    I am not sure how that story got started, but belief in the idea is strong. Underwater sonar readings clearly showing a rocky core in the center of Zelen are disregarded. How can you argue when the same sea monsters seen on one side of the globe are suddenly seen on the other side of the world? Phyler and I always share a few scornful opinions on both sea monster sightings and the infinity of the Infinite Ocean.


    However, as enjoyable as our walk is, the force of the wind is always a revelation after living in the quiet and peaceful Round Woods, where tall trees act as windbreaks.


    The eastern lowlands start as hills covered with grasses and scrubby trees, but quickly become flat and sandy. And as much as we try to stay inconspicuous, the wind always notices us hiking. It becomes interested in our progress and visits us uninvited.


    There is nothing to stop the wind¡¯s forceful progress across the open land. It gusts hard against us, striking our faces and howling in our ears. It merely laughs at our presumption to complain before it blows even stronger.


    The wind increases as we head further east. It forces travelers to wear layers of clothes to keep it at bay, even on a warm day. We pull our sturdy linen cloaks close but still tire of the living wind howling around us. The squalls tug on our garments and toss sand in our eyes. They spray grit everywhere, tear belongings out of hands, chap skin, and dehydrate bodies. I think the wind would even enjoy knocking us over and dragging us into the ocean.


    I finally shout, enough! Let us alone or we will bring Rau¡¯u here to deal with you. The wind knows that Rau¡¯u could invoke multiple dust devils to break up its force into a series of small breezes, so it finally leaves us alone, moving away to grasp onto the next travelers.


    I¡¯m relieved to see the ocean and Rau¡¯u¡¯s home come into sight. The ocean looks wide and calm and very blue on this sunny day. To the north we see a pod of dolphins cutting through the waves. We are not here to see them, so we just wave hello and keep walking.


    We see Rau¡¯u outside, doing a bit of housekeeping. She is raking all of the dead grasses around her house into a big pile to keep the local beach tidy. Most homeowners would burn all of the dead plants, but Rau¡¯u waves a hand and the detritus simply disappears.


    Rau¡¯u catches a glimpse of us and says hello telepathically, then walks along the trail to meet us. We are all looking forward to visiting the mermaids and Queen Mystica today.

 Chapter 22: The mermaids and the Infinite Ocean

    The realm called Ocean¡¯s Edge is quite a large area but sparsely populated due to the poor soils and maddening wind. Rau¡¯u spends most of her time there coordinating the different geographic boundaries that run up against each other: the edge of the Round Woods meets grassy scrubland, that meets sandy beach and rocky seashore, that eventually rims the wide blue Infinity Ocean. Rau¡¯u coordinates not only the creatures of the land and air, but also the beings of the sea, including my favorites, the mermaids.


    After Phyler and I greeted Rau¡¯u, we all climbed upon the granite cliffs of Sailor Rock to summon the mermaids. We would easily see them glide through the water as they arrived.


    The high rocky peak is called Sailor Rock because sailors traditionally leave offerings there for the mermaids. They row to the base of the rock from their sailing ships, singing praises all the way. The songs contain flattering phrases and extravagant good wishes, and are sung sincerely even if out of tune. They leave small scrolls of love poetry tucked into gifts of flower necklaces, fresh fruit, or carved wooden treasure boxes.


    The sailors hope their songs and offerings will convince the mermaids to help any seafarers who fall into the ocean due to accident or shipwreck, and set them safely onto the shore instead of dragging them to their demises in the marine depths. It is unknown to me whether their sycophant gifts work or not, but I don¡¯t hear many rumors of sailor bodies washing up on the beaches in our area of the world. So maybe it is a clever move on their part.


    The mermaids eventually arrived, their silvery scales shimmering green and blue as they glided through the water. We walked down to the beach to greet them. They smiled and greeted us, too, their long silver hair streaming with water.


    Zelen mermaids are humanoid on their top half. Although their skin is pale and slightly green, they are quite lovely. Instead of legs their bodies merge into fishy tails covered in scales that reflect shifting colors. The mermaids can leave the ocean for a time whenever they like, so they joined us at the base of Sailor Rock.


    As always, languages and interspecies communication modes are not my specialty. I can convey honesty and willingness to help as needed, and I am adequate with telepathic languages, but I don¡¯t really understand most spoken foreign languages very well. Phyler and Rau¡¯u always seem to easily comprehend both leader and group and any language, no matter where we are or who we speak with. I think that is a real gift in life.


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    Phyler and Rau¡¯u spoke animatedly with Queen Mystica. I was relieved that there were no serious issues we needed to discuss. Our visit remained social and uneventful. As far as business affairs, we merely conducted a satisfied discussion of how we continued to keep on top of our two main problems: smugglers and polluters. Yes, some problems are universal to all worlds.


    Next we moved onto exchanging mutual tokens of regard. Since this was not a state visit, I brought gifts neutral enough to serve as official presentations, if we ended up discussing any kind of pressing business, yet personal enough to be enjoyed.


    First, I brought a pot of local orange blossom honey for Rau¡¯u, knowing how much she enjoys it on warm homemade bread.


    For the mermaids, I carried fresh delicate spring lettuces for Queen Mystica to pass along to the manatees, who are great favorites of mine. I also brought a mesh bag of navel oranges for the entire mermaid pod. They do enjoy the novelty of sweet and brightly colored fruit now and again. I didn¡¯t need to carry these fresh items all the way from the southern climates of Zelen, I just transported to a tropical region to pick them up while we were waiting for the mermaids.


    The mermaids brought me a large assortment of fresh seaweed. They know I love to dry it and keep it for use in cooking. I enjoy the briny flavor added to my occasional woodland greens and mushroom stews. For Phyler, the mermaids brought dried sand dollars and rare seashells. It was a charming gift that the entire flutter of fairies will enjoy viewing and displaying.


    Next, we settled on granite chairs at the base of Sailor Rock. These chairs had been carved eons ago and were smoothed by wind and rain. Their purpose was to allow visitors to comfortably listen to mermaid music.


    The mermaid voices were so beguiling that even I, a fellow magical being rarely mesmerized by any music, felt the urge to walk right into the ocean and follow after them. Imagine how much stronger the desire to swim with the mermaids would have been if I had been human with few defenses against magic and enchantment.


    Phyler and I headed back to the Round Woods after our successful visit. Since we were still feeling caught up in the mermaid songs, we each just instantly transported back to our respective homes instead of walking.


    I hung some of the seaweed in my stone cottage to dry, but decided I felt a little lonely. I wanted to take most of the briny gift to my wife Jaal, and tell her about the mermaids. I decided to transport to my home world and surprise my family. There is nothing like a visit home for a long weekend, with a gift I know the family will enjoy, to make me completely happy.

 Chater 23: Gnomy loves the endlessly interesting akashic records

    Let¡¯s start by asking: why are the universes so full of every kind of gossip when we have the akashic records? After all, the records were set up just for beings across the cosmos to find all knowledge about literally everything, everywhere. There should be no need to guess or make up lies.


    Ah, but there is a catch.


    Access to the akashic records is annoyingly limited. You will only be shown information that enhances your soul growth during this lifetime¡¯s journey, and only information that can be viewed without changing the future. Different species and different individuals have different amounts of access, depending on their futures.


    When we were teenagers, my friends and I tried to beat the information limitations by looking up records about each other¡¯s lives. We thought we¡¯d be able to combine bits of knowledge to get hints of what lay ahead in our group¡¯s future. No matter what we tried, the akashic records would only give us information to the edge of what could change the future, or what could change us for the future. We would marvel at how precisely it showed information that could be safely shared, and no more.


    Surprisingly, even the creator gods, who are responsible for forming living beings, planets and solar systems, can¡¯t access all the information about the universes. Only a very few cosmic beings in top positions have unrestricted access to all knowledge.


    There are various ways to access the akashic records. Most beings can access the records through deep meditation. Many beings have permission to access the akashic records on the glass tablet computers that are so commonly used across the galaxies. Some humanoids even have computer chip implants fitted into their brains to psychically access the records. The records don¡¯t just include books and scrolls, there are also holographic still images and videos to view.


    This means that it usually isn¡¯t necessary to travel in person to the akashic records campus. Personally, I love to visit the akashic records. I think going to the hall of records makes research easier and it is a lot of fun.


    I often transport directly to the akashic library when I am doing serious research. Complex questions require access to a lot of information, and I find that reading physical copies of original documents is much easier than peering at electronic versions. I always feel like I have gone back in time to gnome college, with books and publications piled all around me on a big library table. It¡¯s a relaxing and comforting arrangement that brings back echoes of my youth.


    Any subject you want to access is contained within one or more halls of knowledge. The library itself has a cyber brain that tries to simplify your questions and anticipate which archives you would prefer to view. For beginners, it¡¯s not enough. A librarian or assistants are crucial to help with the difficult task of looking through the collections.


    As a visitor looks around the library, the huge and almost endless interconnecting rooms are astonishing and intimidating. It¡¯s even hard to notice what color the walls are, since every vertical surface is filled with bookshelves and millions of original, physical books. Most volumes can be touched and opened, but some of the earliest fragile scrolls or books would crumble if handled, so they can only be accessed electronically. There is also an infinity of electronic volumes that can be given temporary holographic form so you too can contentedly surround yourself with stacks of books.This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.


    I don¡¯t research many topics these days. I am usually studying information on florae that exist throughout many universes, to help in developing new plants for worlds that are being terraformed. Sometimes I am researching historical accounts and want to look through ancient gnomic scrolls. And sometimes I look up my own contributions to science, just to make sure they appear in the books of knowledge. I never actually believe my writings are there until I see them.


    The building itself is the most massive and fascinating structure you could ever imagine. It started as an elegant Greek style building with a classic columned entrance. The building has gradually been made bigger and has become disorderly in design. It now has large haphazard additions with many levels, seemingly endless marble walls, gabled roofs, stairways and occasional large glass windows.


    The unbelievably massive structure is set on lovely wide lawns with plenty of benches to rest both mind and body. The akashic records campus is open for walking, so I always spend some time outdoors when I¡¯m there. The entire campus is quiet and hushed, with visiting beings appropriately in awe of both the infinite knowledge and mythical reputation of the library.


    When I step outside for some fresh air and sunshine, I always amuse myself by looking around to see if there are any earthlings or similarly bewildered humanoids stumbling around looking dazed. They are forbidden admittance into the akashic records building because they are not meant to see into the future at all. Nevertheless, they and other species sometimes suddenly appear on the grounds outside.


    How do beings from around the universes just randomly show up? The secret of how to activate ancient planetary portals, which are usually doorways carved into natural rock formations, has gotten lost on many planets. But the doorways are still there and it is possible to accidentally trigger them. If you don¡¯t specify where you want to go when traveling through an interstellar portal, you usually end up at the akashic records.


    There are always a few life forms on the campus who accidentally fell into a portal and ended up at the records. These lost and startled souls are an interesting diversion from my serious research.


    The library attendants would help if asked, but since these unauthorized beings can¡¯t get into the library, they can¡¯t ask. I usually help these accidental visitors rather than let any lurking evil presence get hold of them. After all, I¡¯m the friendliest face around them. Everybody recognizes a gnome when they see one. I can physically talk to humanoids through a translation device, which is more comforting than many species who only communicate psychically.


    I can tell where they came from by their energy readings. This is fortunate because they are often too frightened to speak coherently. Instead of making them search for a nearby planetary portal, I lead them to it and send them back to their own place and time. It amuses me that they will have a good story to tell when they get home.


    A few of these beings beg to travel the universes with me, but I refuse. Transporting unauthorized life forms would be a serious breach of intergalactic law. I would no doubt be found out and get into trouble. Besides, the various life forms are not so very entertaining that I want to spend lots of time with them.


    I have been to the akashic records many times, and always enjoy my visit. However, I still find the experience overly stimulating and exhausting. I am always ready to go home after a long day, taking a generous amount of holographic reading matter to ponder during quiet evenings at home.

 Chapter 24: The tale of Ginsor and the gold hoarders

    Gnomes love to talk about olden days. To hear us tell our story, the eras of antiquity were the best times to live anywhere, anytime, in any of the universes. Every gnome was heroic and clever, and always driven by the purest of motives. Every gnome endeavor ended successfully and became a moral guidepost for future gnomes to follow.


    If I am honest, I am proud to say that the written scrolls show our history was indeed proud and dramatic and consequential, and it did set us on the correct path for our future. However, no story is unblemished. I found multiple instances of gnome rogues and villains in our ancient past. The tale below is taken from one of the earliest gnomic scrolls at the akashic records. This scandalous story throws light on why our society developed as it has.


    Details of this unsavory early episode were recorded by one of the gnomes involved in it, who became known as Ginsor the Gold Hoarder.


    Instead of choosing a typical gnome occupation filled with gardening, horticulture and generally making planets better, Ginsor and some other young gnomes decided to take up gold mining. They found a solar system containing planets that were heavy with gold, and the group spread out among these worlds. The gnomes moved into existing underground caverns or dug deep within the mantle of their chosen planet.


    At that time, gold mining was not an activity that was objectionable or frowned upon by gnome society. Not at all. However, this offshoot group of gold miners became very fixated on piling up wealth. Each gnome greedily hoarded gold, jewels and rare metals in their cave complexes.


    Instead of creating a community with common interests, each gnome became focused on what they had individually obtained. The only shared interest the gnomes had in common was that they enjoyed calling themselves ¡°gold hoarders.¡± It did describe them very well. They essentially became warlords with huge underground fortresses.


    All the priceless inventory required each hoarder to hire gangs of vicious and terrifying goblins as guards. These goblins were constantly fighting amongst themselves and even with the gnomes who hired them. As the gnomes would have known if they had checked at all, goblins cannot work together for very long without trouble flaring. The goblins became increasingly bitter and argumentative about small grievances, escalating their complaints from words to actions. The goblin guards turned into roving bands of thieves and murderers. Even the gnomes became frightened of the goblin gangs.


    Daily goblin violence soon caused these greedy gnomes to live in fear of everybody, including other gold hoarder gnomes. There was no friendship or affection and no sense of community, all of which normal gnomes value greatly. There was only a ¡°what can I steal from you¡± mentality.


    Battles were fought, gnomes were murdered, and fortunes were stolen. Medieval-style fiefdoms quickly became warring nation-states, with goblins provoking the conflicts into larger battles.


    Now gnomes thrive in sunlight and tranquility, so these gnomes had set up a very unhealthy atmosphere for themselves. Their dishonesty and hatred only resulted in war and destruction. The larger gnome society was worried about gold hoarding conflicts spilling into their communities. Various clans were afraid that huge regional wars would ignite on or between gnome worlds. Gnome society was in crisis.Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site.


    Fortunately, while our gnomic supreme council was debating what to do, the gold hoarding miners found that they had become very depressed from living in dank underground burrows. Disagreements and daily skirmishes were wearing on their patience. Their very souls rebelled against the endless darkness, quarreling and greed.


    The miners were filled with despair. They yearned to return to their simple lives. They craved sunlight, clear blue skies, and idyllic landscapes filled with thriving plants and healthy animals. Most of all, they craved peace.


    After much worry about how they would be received by gnome society, the surviving gold miners elected a leader to figure out how to get out of the tunnels and back to their families. That leader was Ginsor.


    Ginsor came up with a desperate plan. He led the group in approaching the supreme council. On their knees, with downcast faces and hats in hand, the miners begged for clemency. The former warlords pledged their entire gold hoards toward reversing the damage they had caused. They asked to rejoin gnome society.


    The council knew a good opportunity when they saw one, and mediators were quickly called in. Feuds were resolved and goblins were driven out. Peace treaties were agreed upon and signed. Mined-out and war-ruined planets were restored to their former beauty.


    The murder of gnomes by other gnomes is considered to be especially heinous, but even so, gnome societies have a hard time severely punishing members who truly repent what they have done. They would rather rehabilitate where possible.


    The supreme council decided on a seldom-used punishment for the surviving gnomes: incarceration on a prison planet for 500 years. Upon release, they were banned from gnome worlds for the remainder of their current lives. Instead, they were permitted to live on whichever approved planets would have them. They would also spend their next hundred reincarnations on parole, with constant checks to make sure they were treading the straight and narrow.


    Most importantly, extended discussions took place about what went wrong and at what point the gnomes had gone astray from basic morals. Societal values were discussed and future pathways were evaluated.


    When gnomes take on a task, they handle it thoroughly and in detail. The olden gnome council was determined to develop societal improvements correctly. They set up an advisory board, and all home worlds were requested to send representatives to discuss the issues.


    A huge multitude of completed documents resulted from their work. Titles included Standards for Gnome Ethics, Outlines for Community Growth, Guarantees of Personal Freedoms, Guidelines of Individual Responsibilities, Planet Reclamation Guiding Principles, How to Adhere to Gnomic Values in Alien Solar Systems, and so forth, in great detail.


    Gnomes don¡¯t generally get caught up in a lot of rules, but when we are envisioning our future, we do tend to get caught up in trying to anticipate every possible scenario. The councils and groups finally had to rein in their worried imaginings, sign the documents, and apply their ideals as best they could.


    Things have gone well since that dark time. The formal documents have become a strong foundation for decisions about moving into an uncharted future. Ginsor¡¯s tale of gold hoarders is much studied by young gnomes. It¡¯s a vivid reminder of why it¡¯s necessary to clarify morals and values, then live by them.


    Ultimately, gnomes have learned much from this tragic episode. Our society has sworn to seek no rewards for our work beyond achieving healthy planets, vibrant wild spaces and contented animals. After all, what else could we need? Gnomes are much fulfilled by our social bonds and the honest work we have chosen. We are fortunate to be known and valued for our contributions to planets throughout many universes. These are the riches we celebrate.

 Chapter 25: Here be dragons

    Out in the vast unknown hinterlands of the universe, you can still find savage dragons living as they did back in the olden days: quarreling with their neighboring dragons, fighting over hoards of gold, pillaging and destroying towns, killing townsfolk, and stealing ever more gold. Dragons have not changed at all in these isolated and primitive worlds.


    However, dragons have changed a lot in modern and enlightened worlds.


    But before I get into that story, let me tell you the myth of how dragons first came to be created. Their ancestry is just as old as the universe, and just as fascinating.


    The story of dragons starts with a sliver of primordial flame breaking free from the fiery birth of the very first star. That burning ember tumbled across the newly created, empty universe. Finding nothing to impede its way, it kept dancing across the expanding cosmos. The burning spiral twirled faster and faster.


    The universe was generating a life force of its own as it grew. The twisting blur of wayward cosmic flame combined with the empty universe¡¯s new and potent vitality. The cataclysm caused by their explosive connection resulted in the birth of the very first dragons.


    The dragons opened their eyes, and seeing fire in and around and of themselves, turned that first realization of hot yellow flame into an inborn quest for gold. In their minds, gold was merely a terrestrial form of that first twisting flame.


    Dragons will never stop seeking to experience that flame again, hence their need to heap the essence of fire all around themselves. Their quest for fire takes the form of a large pile of bright and shiny gold. All dragons try to accumulate their own prized golden hoards, even if they don¡¯t understand why they do it.


    Have you ever seen an image of a Chinese dragon from planet Earth? Real dragons look surprisingly similar to those traditional images, being long and thin with whiskers and a scaly body. They show dark against a blue sky, but are actually gold colored and sometimes pulse with rapidly changing, bright colors. The colors become very intense when emotions are aroused.


    In olden days, when residents of the universes were less knowledgeable than now, dragons were thought to be gods. In fact, dragons took advantage of this and insisted on being treated like gods.


    All residents of the cosmos did bow down to dragons as gods. Both mortal and immortal beings were terrified and mesmerized by dragons. After all, the winged reptiles in the sky were fearsome and had laid waste to many cities in their quest to steal stores of gold.


    However, things are different these days. Humanoid civilizations do not so easily believe in gods anymore. It takes more than some fire breathing and fancy flying to impress modern beings. They understand dragon capabilities, but just as importantly, they understand dragon limitations. New modern fighting capabilities mean that humanoids can easily defend against the fierce raiders from the skies.The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.


    From the dragons¡¯ point of view, they lived well in olden days. They didn¡¯t really mind being shot at with wooden arrows and didn¡¯t even mind getting hit where their armor was weak. That was the price to pay if a dragon got careless with its defenses. However, dragons became most unhappy in these modern times. They hated getting knocked out of the skies with giant electric pulses. They hated the humiliation of writhing in pain on the ground, then being hauled off to lengthy confinements. And even worse, their quests for gold were no longer profitable at all.


    Naked aggression was not their best choice any longer. So, they had to brainstorm some new ideas.


    Adaptability became the key to modern dragons¡¯ survival. They cannot change their innate craving for gold but have learned to obtain gold in ways other than pillaging terrified villagers. These days, there are new and profitable traditions. Since dragons are incredibly smart and versatile, they have come up with new ways to make money. These methods involve starting family businesses completely separate from their past looting and pillaging.


    By the way, you might be surprised to realize that the first modern profession dragons had to master was public relations. Yes, it¡¯s true. That actually makes sense, if you think about it. No one believed that dragons were serious when they announced the decision to go legit. It took much nonviolent persuading from the dragons over many years for the first few humanoid worlds to allow dragons on their territories. There was shock all around the universe when the dragons kept their promises to live quietly and peacefully.


    Next the dragons moved into the professions they were really interested in taking on. There were many jobs that took advantage of the skills they already possessed.


    The most popular businesses closely aligned with dragons¡¯ warlike, predatory nature, but focused on protecting instead of destroying. Dragons have a long history of anticipating and destroying adversaries, so they were naturals in an air defense role. Traditionally fierce dragons now specialize in airborne planetary protection, leading defenses against hostile intruders.


    Dragons can see in both ultraviolet and infrared light spectrums, and have keen hearing, quick reflexes, and far-reaching psychic powers.  These abilities make them valuable in quickly evaluating trespassers. Dragons can slip from serene to terrifying in an instant, so they rarely have to do more than turn their slitted yellow eyes in the direction of a would-be trespasser for that life form to flee at top speed.


    After an enjoyable midair chase, dragons can incinerate their enemies quite satisfactorily, if they choose, just by using the flames emanating from their mouths.


    Some dragons who enjoy outside work have taken to searching for wildlife poachers. A well-placed smack of a tail will easily knock a poacher unconscious so it can be picked up by sharp claws and removed to the custody of police forces. The dragons enjoy practicing these precision flying skills.


    Not every dragon clan still has the flying skills to intimidate enemies. Therefore, some dragons have come up with other profitable yet equally enjoyable business ideas. Their resourcefulness at surviving modern worlds never seems to end.

 Chapter 26: The affairs of dragons

    Humanoids are often given the advice to not meddle in the affairs of dragons because they are quick to anger. This is good advice, but as long as dragons keep their thoughts on the gold earned from their highly profitable business affairs, they can control their tempers.


    Beyond the many phenomenally successful security businesses, which suit dragon temperaments so well, there are other noteworthy careers.


    A surprisingly popular dragon occupation is not so much historian as historical fiction writer. Dragon knowledge of the first days of the universe is unsurpassed, since they have existed throughout all of history. Unfortunately, dragons tend toward hyperbole and misdirection and it¡¯s reflected in their writing. They are unlikely to tell the truth if an invented tale is more interesting. For instance, today¡¯s dragons state that early dragons were the first true gods. This bold claim is not accepted by any other early universe scholars.


    Unfortunately, the discrepancies in their books compared to generally accepted history are so large that dragon research is regarded as merely apocryphal. Biographies of their early heroes are considered more boast than actual history. Modern texts about an early golden era, where dragons slew all enemies and built castles from their burned bones, are considered as extremely exaggerated myth. However, these works are quite enjoyable to read as fiction and sell well in bookstores.


    There are a few dragons that took up careers in the healing arts.


    Healing dragons are quite special and revered. They are rare and mysterious. They accept requests for medical consultation and will act as healers on their own terms or not at all.


    A healing dragon¡¯s decision about whether to help a being seems very capricious to observers. Their acceptance criteria are quite puzzling at first glance, but in actuality it¡¯s quite simple. Healing dragons have access to knowledge of the Creator of All¡¯s plans for most beings in this universe. They integrate that knowledge with an extensive reading of the person¡¯s soul and a mysterious dragon-specific reasoning of their own.


    All dragons heal by re-arranging a patient¡¯s energy molecules. There are more technical explanations for the process, but no explanation is more accurate. The healing manifests in ways unique to the patient, depending on their medical issue, the dragon¡¯s judgment, and the universe¡¯s plans.


    If you¡¯re interested in requesting a dragon¡¯s services for healing, meditate to relax your subconscious. Then call to the dragon in your mind. Try to shift into alignment with it. Perhaps the dragon will appear, frolicking and diving across your mind¡¯s eye. Thank the dragon and make your request. It may just be granted.Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit.


    Some dragons have gone into the entertainment business.


    Although dragons no longer terrorize populations, they still like to keep their incredible physical skills honed. Consequently, they¡¯ve set up very popular contests of strength and agility. They call their teams names like Diving Dragons, Lizard Flyers or Twisting Flames. They have turned their traditional agility games into lucrative moneymaking spectator sports. The dragons and their teams are just as popular as any human teams or players.


    Finally, the most creative dragons have brilliantly re-imagined the concept of roller coasters and invented a whole new type of roller coaster.


    Traditional roller coasters are still popular on many worlds. But dragons have moved several steps up from that simple concept, with much more thrilling rides called dragon coasters. The rides are so unique that humanoids come from all over the galaxies just for the experience.


    Riders are strapped two by two onto the long back of a very large dragon. Then the dragon takes off, beating its powerful wings, flying high. You can hear the riders¡¯ nervous squeals as anticipation rises. The dragon suddenly executes a series of flips, spirals and loop-de-loops high up in the air. It is terrifying and incredibly exciting at the same time. The dragon even belches hot flames so that the riders can enjoy being a bit smoky and scorched as they fly along.


    The dragon plunges toward the ground amid even more terrified shrieks. It banks up at the last second to avoid an actual crash.


    At a few of the larger entertainment complexes, there are two dragons that take off at the same time. They spiral around each other, emitting flames. They spiral faster and faster, adding loud roars and smoke to further shake up the users.


    There is nothing as terrifying and entertaining, yet completely safe, anywhere else in the universe. It¡¯s a high speed, wild, scream until you¡¯re hoarse, fun time. It¡¯s definitely not for small children.


    Remember that dragons have advanced psychic powers, so they would know if there were any upcoming dangers and easily avoid them. There have been no fatalities or major incidents in the history of dragon coaster rides.


    With such a variety of talents and business ideas, all of these clever dragon entrepreneurs have become valued members of society on many worlds. Dragons live close to their businesses, but continue to maintain their historical castles in remote medieval worlds. The dragons and surrounding townsfolk now live in peaceful coexistence instead of in conflict.


    Dragons still have an aspect of grasping and acquisitiveness in their nature, and they probably always will. However, using their strong intelligence and unique abilities to integrate themselves more fully into modern society was ingenious. Their castle keeps and dungeons continue to fill with gold since the work they have chosen is very lucrative indeed. Fortunately for us all, these days dragons find working as members of the corporate world more fulfilling than being dragons of war and plunder.

 Chapter 27: Nature meditation 1: From Eden鈥檚 Spring to Long Lake

    How do you get away from it all, when you feel like you need to get away from it all, but you already live away from it all? For me, the key is to leave all my gnomish work duties behind and roam aimlessly for a while.


    I don¡¯t even want the mental effort of deciding where to go, I just want to get out and experience the wilderness around me. To help me leave quickly and not have to come up with a plan, I¡¯ve devised some small journeys that I call nature meditations.


    Today on this perfect summer¡¯s day, a tranquil trip from my stone hut to the end of Long Lake is a great way for me to de-stress and enjoy the reasons I live in the Round Woods.


    Even walking out my front door reminds me of all the things I appreciate.


    I chose my hut location because it¡¯s just about fifty paces from a small spring that bubbles up from the ground. The water filters through stone and sand, making it wonderfully clean and sweet.


    Where the little spring overflows into a tiny brook, I placed a few rocks to make a small pool. All passersby, whether two-legged or four-legged or small and multi-legged, can easily drink their fill and rejuvenate themselves. I call this welcoming little oasis Eden¡¯s Spring. Few travelers realize that it is my own name. They think the name Eden was chosen because of the surrounding beautiful scenery.


    Eden¡¯s Spring spills over and becomes a little stream that meanders into the Low Meadow, where it joins with other small watercourses also on their way east. The long, succulent grasses send their roots to these small streams for a drink. This hushed grassland, quiet except for the slight noise of running water and small plants swaying in the breeze, attracts birds and all sorts of meadow creatures.


    The shallow streams crisscross and grow ever larger, changing from ankle-deep ripples easily stepped across, finally to a single sparkling, slow moving stream. This stream converges with a few other minor water sources to become a small creek, which finally becomes deep enough to float a small gnome boat.


    I built an inconspicuous small overhang, partially disguised by some brambles, to store my kayak and oar. I pull them from their hiding place and place the craft into the water, managing to step in without mishap.


    I named this section of waterway, just past the Low Meadow where it becomes a gradually widening creek, Friends Passage. What else could I call it? My friends are all around me on this journey.


    As I paddle downstream, I can tell by the way my sweet wild friends say hello to me that news of today¡¯s journey has raced ahead of me. Wildflowers nod to me. The large willow trees dip their branches lower so I can touch their swaying leaves in passing. Even the flourishing grasses shimmer in the sun, rippling a wave of green toward me.Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website.


    Ravens dip and caw, wheeling in the sky before they fly away. Swans dip their beaks, ducks quack, geese honk. Foxes and deer look up from their forages in the grass. Peace and great affection settle on the meadow during my passage.


    I especially enjoy the babies of the meadow. They give me a hard glance, since they haven¡¯t learned who I am yet. Their attempts at ferocity are endearing. I nod my head to the parents to let them know what fine offspring they have produced.


    Occasionally Phyler will accompany me when I make this journey. She often seats herself on the upturned tip of the kayak and adds her own high chirruping tones to the greetings and small rustles all around us. Today Phyler merely does a circling flyby, checking from above to make sure all is well, then soars off again.


    Eventually Friends Passage widens to become Long Lake. The lake is long although not very wide. It is dotted with small islands that were placed there by the creator gods just for use by nesting wild birds. And what a lovely variety of birds there are on the lake islands, all going about their daily avian business undisturbed by predators.


    Long Lake is a birdwatching delight. I always end up just drifting with the currents for a while, charmed by the busy birds and their natural world. I lose myself in peaceful meditations.


    The lake finally ends at rocks and small rapids that continue to head east. The Long Lake Falls are not too treacherous except in spring, when they temporarily become whitewater falls due to melting snow. I don¡¯t want to get caught in the fast-moving cascades of water then or at any time of year, so I pull my kayak onto the sandy shore close to the end of Long Lake.


    The final section of the waterway past Long Lake is named Singing River. It flows all the way to the ocean. Legend has it that the songs of mermaids can be heard all the way along the river. It¡¯s probably merely the wind singing through the tall pine trees, but no one can say for sure.


    The Infinite Ocean is too far for my half day trip, but sometimes my family visits Zelen and we spend several days kayaking and camping. We always portage around the rocky Long Lake Falls.


    I pull myself from memories of family trips, and walk to the top of a hill to stretch my legs a bit. I turn and look back at the lake with its many inhabitants equally enjoying their day.


    My heart feels like it might burst from joy at my much-needed solitude, my furry and feathered friends who are happy to see me, and the beauty of a pristine natural landscape. I live in a world rich with life and beauty.


    I hear the waterfalls as I head back to my kayak, the water now at summer levels and no longer roaring loudly with spring snow melt. These same waterfalls are often no more than a fast-moving current by the time maple trees start turning colors.


    I usually stop in the center of the lake before heading home from my meditation, and today is no different. A holly bush and an ivy plant have donated some tendrils that I have woven into a simple wreath. I say a small blessing to those who have come before me and had the foresight to plan this area so well. I bless the animals who live here, and wish them well through the years. Finally, I drop the wreath onto the lake. Then I row home through lengthening shadows and cool evening breezes.

 Chapter 28: Goodbye to the Beginning Tree

    It was a sad morning in the Round Woods when we discovered that our eldest and most cherished oak tree in the Grove of the Ancients had crashed down during a ferocious overnight storm.


    There was widespread damage throughout the Woods. Fortunately, there were few injuries to the resident animals and their families. They had the good sense to realize there was a storm coming and to burrow into their homes and hiding places ahead of time.


    But losing this particular tree was a huge tragedy. This ancient, stately, learned tree was very special indeed. It was a Beginning Tree.


    Beginning Trees are given life by the creator gods themselves. Their purpose is to be both a source of knowledge and a witness to the development of a newly formed planet. This Beginning Tree was created specifically for our planet Zelen.


    The Tree chose the name Ordell for itself, which is Latin for ¡°new beginning.¡± Beginning Trees have no gender, but our Zelen community felt rude calling Ordell ¡°it,¡± so he was referred to as a male due to his imposing majestic presence.


    Ordell had more than succeeded in his mission of being a recorder of Zelen¡¯s evolution. He knew the planet¡¯s entire history all the way back to its creation.


    Ordell had watched Zelen¡¯s beginning, recording how hot magma pushed from Zelen¡¯s fiery center and cooled into huge mountains of granite rocks. He observed as vast amounts of water poured down from the icy clouds that wander endlessly throughout the universe. He saw lakes fill, oceans form and life begin. Ordell knew every species of plant and animal that had ever lived throughout the planet¡¯s seasons.


    Ordell not only knew everything about Zelen, but was in touch with other Beginning Trees on other planets. He had access to their experiences, their knowledge and even their expectations for the future of the cosmos.


    Ordell was part of the vast Beginning Tree network across the universes. Their intertwined knowledge is more than a single Tree could ever know. Their collective information stores revolve around creator gods, universes, galaxies, planets, all manner of species, and even much knowledge of magical beings like elves and fairies and gnomes. They know the subtleties of the planning for this universe, and how it came to be such as it is.


    To those unfamiliar with Beginning Trees, these primeval trees seem impassive and unconcerned with the universes around them. However, that is not true. They are willing to tell their tales to any being who has the patience to learn their slow language, plus the willingness to settle in and listen. The old trees are extremely pleased when their recollections are helpful to other beings.


    Ordell was ancient when I first met him many millennia ago, when Zelen was still in its early stages. He did not so much learn my language as I learned his method of speaking. We connected psychically, through thoughts and images. Our conversations were communication between sympathetic minds. We were different species and extremely different in thoughts and form, but we still had harmony and understanding between us.This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.


    Ordell and I had many long, slow conversations during warm summer nights. His words came from a place deep inside the earth, rising through his roots and trunk. He was curious about many topics and especially interested in the living beings around him. Every subject we discussed was added to his store of knowledge.


    I spent much time sitting in the huge tree¡¯s presence. I learned to wait patiently while he decided which knowledge he wanted to impart that evening, and I listened while he slowly brought the information from his immense resources. Ordell was not just knowledgeable but also wise. I learned so much about our planet Zelen and the surrounding galaxies. He even told creation stories that were unknown in the akashic records, since he and other Beginning Trees were given life prior to the idea of collecting all of the data from all of the universes.


    Ordell was the progenitor of all the oak trees in our Grove of the Ancients. They grew from his acorns. These Ancients are also quite knowledgeable and awe-inspiring, but they do not have the special magic that the creator gods had bestowed upon Ordell and all of the original Beginning Trees. I do not have quite the strong friendships with the younger trees that I had with him.


    I shall miss Ordell tremendously.


    We decided that Ordell would want to be allowed to decompose in the forest where he had resided for so many millennia. Ordell would be happy to know that the scattered bits of bark and wood will eventually be nourishment for a woodland carpet of flowers.


    I did set aside larger pieces of wood to carve into special items in the future. The logs still have echoes of Ordell¡¯s magic throughout them. I shall have to think deeply about how best to use the precious lengths. Perhaps I could carve some trees of life to adorn the homes of my friends. The magic endowed from the creator gods could only help to protect their families. Or perhaps some serving bowls for fruit and gathered foods. An echo of enchantment from the creator gods would be a blessing for any table. And of course, I will carve a memorial to Ordell to place in the Grove of the Ancients. Future generations should never forget how his knowledge helped us form the planet.


    Since Ordell had a large network of friends who loved and appreciated him and an entire grove of descendants who revered him, we decided to hold his memorial in the Grove of the Ancients.


    I made a wreath of Ordell¡¯s branches and foliage, weaving together both the still-green leaves and some of the older yellow and brown leaves. It was a symbol of the past, present and future of Zelen. The ripples of his knowledge and affection for the Round Woods will forever be a part of us. I placed the wreath at the entrance to the Grove.


    We settled in for a day of grieving our loss together. Beings from all over the universe joined us, and we held long, slow conversations with Ordell¡¯s descendants. We shared memories of Ordell¡¯s kindness and willingness to share his knowledge. We recalled his enjoyment of learning about everything, from the smallest insect to the intricacies of how a universe was formed. We marveled at his ability to see the ¡°all¡± of everything, how every living being and every swirl of matter fit together to form the cosmos.


    Ordell¡¯s energy has returned to the vast universe from whence it came, but we are so much richer for his long sojourn in the Round Woods.


    I smiled at the thought of how much Ordell would have enjoyed his memorial. He would be happy at how much we appreciated him, and how we will continue to value his descendants'' involvement in our lives.


    Feeling drained but at peace after the long sad day, I turned from the somber stillness of the Grove and back to the energy and warmth of the living world.

 Chapter 29: Nature meditation 2: Phyler and Gnomy head to the frozen North

    All the gnomes I know hate snow. Including me! We are more of a warm weather species. We quickly become impatient for the end of freezing weather so we can get back to our plants again.


    We also worry about birds and animals over winter. Some of them are lucky and simply sleep the winter away, then awake cheerful and fresh when spring arrives. Most have to endure a rough winter or a long dangerous trek south to a warmer climate. I spend every winter concerned about all of them. I help where I can.


    I get so dejected over the thought of snow that each winter Phyler has taken it upon herself to pull me out of my spiritual funk. Since fairies can transform themselves into any form they like, she transforms into a large, soft and warm white swan so she can take me on a cold weather flight.


    Now that is a winter tradition I do enjoy. Although I don¡¯t like being in snow, it turns out that I look forward to viewing a world covered in snow.


    Riding on a large swan looking down on the frozen world from above is a magical experience. At least, it is once I¡¯ve gotten through the process of buttoning my heavy cloak, tightening my scarves and mittens, settling onto Phyler¡¯s temporary swan back, and balancing myself for the rise into the air. Once my attention settles and I look around, the view is spectacular.


    We always take off from the open space in front of my stone hut and circle upwards. My small dwelling with its trickle of smoke coming from the chimney diminishes quickly as we rise upwards. The structure soon becomes impossible to distinguish among larger shapes in the glistening whiteness. My comfortable home is the base for my life in the Round Woods, so it¡¯s a little alarming to see how quickly it disappears from sight.


    The local small streams disappear quickly too. Larger creeks and rivers leading into Long Lake become thin silvery threads. Finally, even the lake itself becomes small. At its far end, the waterfalls racing toward the Infinite Ocean seem insignificant and tame.


    The ocean, normally a half day¡¯s walk distant, becomes visible as a flat horizon to the east. When I¡¯m busy in the Round Woods, I seldom think about the huge expanse of water. Now the ocean is the largest feature around me.


    Phyler turns north to fly toward our destination of the glacier fields high up in the Zodiac Mountains. These glaciers are not close, but Phyler covers the distance quickly.


    From the air, the high mountains look like scenes from a gothic fairy tale. Twisted terrain and dramatic peaks are lofty reminders of Zelen¡¯s geological past. The frequent fast-flowing, steep waterfalls rarely freeze over completely. Tumbling water sparkles and throws rainbow mists against layers of snow.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.


    The high granite rocks are stunningly beautiful, but the sheer cliffs are unclimbable. The mountain spirits don¡¯t like humanoids in their domain. They will decrease temperatures to bitterly cold and increase snowfalls to blizzards if they notice anyone trying to climb. Only eagles and mountain goats may pass to the highest peaks.


    Phyler swoops down close enough to the high ledges for me to hear the waterfalls sing and to see sprays of water arc into the air. I get a good view of both sunny heights and shady wooded areas below me. The interplay of sun and shadow is mesmerizing as we fly. We are close enough for me to breathe in the fragrance of the pine forest, its sweet scent drifting high among the air currents.


    The far north is an empty world over winter. Birds and animals are hibernating or have moved to warmer latitudes. Last year¡¯s plants are dead and covered by snow, or sometimes show as misshapen and fantastic snow-covered lumps.


    We fly further north to see the extreme edge of the tree line and the small evergreens surviving there. They are exquisite in their intricate wind-blasted outlines.


    We continue even further north, all the way to the Northern Pole and its glaciers.


    The peaks are magnificent. Stark, harsh lines of snow and ice against sharp rocky cliffs are on full display. This is where the highest glaciers start and transform into slow rivers of ice. The water often flows into surprise pockets of alpine lakes.


    Every lake has its own distinct green or blue color due to the specific mix of mineral dust flowing into it. Large chunks of ice float on the surfaces of the open water. I always shiver as we pass the frigid scenery.


    Occasional small waterfalls spill over the precipices. Plumes of water plunge straight down into basins so deep we can¡¯t even see their edges.


    The northern mountains are called the Zodiac Mountains because they have such a beautiful view of the northern lights and major constellations. However, it¡¯s too cold to linger once the sun starts to set, so we head back.


    Transporting here at night for a quick half hour of viewing summits and stars before heading back to a warm fireplace is spectacular. The experience is dramatic but not as profound as today¡¯s all-day flight.


    The steady beat of Phyler¡¯s powerful swan wings moving through the air is hypnotic, helping me relax into the rhythm of our long journey home. I pull my scarves closer to keep cold winds from my face. I concentrate on the sensations of my chilly ride so I can take the recollection of such intense harmony with midwinter back to my everyday life. The memory will sustain me until the warmer breezes of spring.


    The far north¡¯s quiet soothes my soul. I enjoy being at a place so isolated that there are no other beings to nudge my consciousness. I would have to orbit around the planet to find a less populated area.


    I would never venture away from the Round Woods to see these glorious sights on my own. I am grateful to Phyler for carrying me away from my cozy hearth to enjoy the peacefulness of Zelen¡¯s northern climate. I need this day in the icy wilderness to give me a new appreciation of my warm and domesticated life.


    As Phyler returns me safely to the earth, I feel rejuvenated. My usual winter activities of checking animals, planning spring gardens, and carving wooden items now seems bearable again. I can tolerate the wait for springtime just a little bit longer.

 Chapter 30: Gnomy tries being a stellar cartographer

    We all know I am never a fan of winter. Recently I started feeling my wintertime blues earlier than usual, brought on by an especially cold and rainy fall season. I could hardly stand thoughts of even more harsh weather in the days ahead. Normally my friends can pull me out of my annual sense of dread, but this time was especially rough.


    Phyler listened to me complain like she did every year, but finally held up her hand for silence. Gnomy, she declared, the Round Woods residents are not going through yet another winter of you constantly sighing and yearning for spring. You think you suffer in silence, but you don¡¯t! It¡¯s time for a change.


    You are not going to have to put up with winter at all this year. You are leaving on a four month off-planet assignment. And, Phyler added, I have already cleared it with the gnome council.


    I was speechless but didn¡¯t even try to argue. Once the gnome elders on the regional council decide something, they don¡¯t change their minds. I knew my winter plans were set in stone.


    I actually was more intrigued than upset, since I was happy at the thought of leaving Zelen¡¯s winter weather. I also knew Phyler and the fairies would have come up with an interesting and novel way for me to spend my time.


    The four-month assignment turned out to be a project working as a stellar cartographer. I would be mapping the gas giant Juno, which is located within the same galaxy as Zelen. Juno is so massive that it has its own barely studied asteroid belt. The mapping project was just a small scientific undertaking, but asteroid mining would be considered depending on the types of minerals found in orbit.


    A complete mapping means counting and classifying every single ice clump, dust patch and rock circling a planet. It¡¯s an important but not terribly exciting task. It¡¯s completed by taking a runabout spaceship and simply moving from one space chunk to the next, determining each chunk¡¯s composition by bombarding it with various x-rays and lasers. It sounds very time-consuming, but when you use a science shuttle designed for asteroid research it actually goes very quickly.


    I was lucky with the runabout allocated to me. It was a large and shiny new Charlie S-class spaceship. It was a sentient ship, meaning it could talk to me and I could talk to it. It had also been given its own personality, so in many ways a conversation with the ship was like speaking to another humanoid.


    The runabout may have been given too much personality. He preferred to be called Charlie the Space Cowboy. He had a huge database of Earth¡¯s old western movies that he was always insisting I must watch. I think Charlie got his strange vocabulary from those movies. Phrases like howdy pardner, yee-haw, hold your horses, git along dogies, meaner than a snake. Yes, Charlie had a way with words.


    Being in space with a cowboy-talking runabout for four months could get lonely and slightly annoying, but I was always in touch with my family and friends. Charlie and I spent a lot of time together, sharing some intense poker games and long discussions about life. I even watched some of those old cowboy movies that Charlie liked so much.


    Just to humor Charlie, we discussed the movies, analyzing their thin plots and shaky story structures. We decided that Clint Eastwood was our favorite actor and acted out some of his scenes. We had conversations about driving cattle to market, sleeping under the stars, and enduring the isolation of living on the prairie. He talked about the drinking, fist fights, and the anticipation of trips into town. I listened to Charlie play campfire songs on his harmonica, and I learned some cowboy songs to play on my flute.This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.


    If I didn¡¯t know better, I would have assumed Charlie had lived through the cowboy era. Perhaps he had been there in some kind of incarnation, since his computer components were so complex that he had a type of machine consciousness.


    What else did I do for four months? I can¡¯t say that I actually worked. I had plenty of time to explore the ship¡¯s catalog of hologram adventures. I spent time viewing constellations through the telescope. I spent hours sprawled in the ship¡¯s comfortable lounge chairs, just looking at the hypnotic beauty of the swirling gases around Juno. I started writing stories about my many lifetimes, which was a project I had been wanting to do for years. I basically relaxed and shed my worries about everybody and everything. It turned out everybody and everything got along without me just fine for four months.


    I invited my wife Jaal to visit as often as she could. We had not been so blissfully alone together, without children or extended family or work interruptions, for many years. It was actually quite romantic. That time by itself was worth four months of living on a spaceship.


    Sure, I could have sneaked off the spaceship if I¡¯d have gotten too lonely between Jaal¡¯s visits, but I was enjoying my respite from real life. It was quite pleasant to have no responsibilities, no appointments and nothing much to do. Even the ship¡¯s replicated foods were pretty good. I had fun adding a few gnome recipes to the database.


    Unlike me on my extremely relaxed voyage, Charlie never got any rest. He was constantly busy with his routine of mapping and measuring rocks. He communicated with other ships for updates. He scheduled all of the mapping timetables. He compiled complex databases of the information he gathered.


    I actually didn¡¯t work on the project at all. Why was I needed?


    Well, the main problem with a sentient ship is that it does not realize when it starts to go into a circular thought pattern. Its logic routine can become overloaded. When that happens, the ship refuses to move on to the next work item because it thinks there are errors in the databases. Charlie would become convinced that he must keep working on the same small equation, over and over again, to get a more accurate answer. It was a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder.


    A humanoid can recognize that a spaceship is having problems and quickly pull it out of dysfunction. Usually just a few manual restarts of the onboard computer hard drives will do the trick.


    This type of logic failure happened five times while I was on the ship. After resetting Charlie and restoring his impaired thinking pathways, I always gave him a pep talk. I told him how minor the problem really was, how well he was doing and how much we depended on him. I would even talk about cowboys, if that¡¯s what Charlie wanted.


    I could tell Charlie was working correctly when he started using his usual cowboy lingo. Then we would take up our normal daily routines until the next time the logic error happened.


    Life on the mapping expedition was pleasant and low stress for me. I felt like I had been on a lengthy vacation when I returned to Zelen. I even brought home a woven straw cowboy hat that Charlie made for me.


    Phyler and the fairies welcomed me with shouts of ¡°howdy pardner,¡± ¡°welcome home buckaroo,¡± and a scattering of columbine blooms thrown over my head. I tucked some of the sprigs into my hat band.


    I thanked Phyler profusely for setting up the expedition. I felt energized and ready to start my springtime routine. Head ''em up, move ''em out, as the cowboys say.


    I did stay in touch with Charlie for a bit, but it turned out that the logic problems were worsened by the database changes that Charlie had made to store his thousands of cowboy movies. Once some repairs were made and those movies were deleted, the space runabout worked better.


    Unfortunately, Charlie¡¯s personality was no longer the same. He had been updated with a boring accountant personality instead. He was no longer fun and quirky, and our relationship was not the same. We no longer had entertaining conversations or had anything in common. I was sad to see our friendship end.


    I have started looking through my incoming emails to see what new scientific trips are being planned. I haven¡¯t seen anything intriguing, but I keep checking. It¡¯s probably fine, though. I think I will be much better at coping with cold weather after such a long break from winter. If not, Phyler will let me know.

 Chapter 31: Gnomy confesses that he likes to watch TV

    I truly do hate to admit when I like doing the same things that humanoids like. Gnomes are so much more advanced than any humanoid species that I feel like I am regressing back in evolutionary time to cave gnome status. However, I must confess that one of my occasional hobbies after a hard day¡¯s work is watching television.


    I wave my hand to activate the TV hologram in the corner of my living room, and it materializes just above my racks of basket-making reeds. I can easily access any television station from around the universes through a basic intergalactic subscription service.


    My favorite kind of TV show is the over-the-air kind, specifically from the first century after a civilization discovers how to broadcast electromagnetic waves. To me, that¡¯s the most interesting time period. Civilizations are exploring their new technology but have not gotten so sophisticated that they have moved on to cable or other technologies.


    There are hundreds of thousands of TV stations with these type of TV shows available to view. Some are transmitted from historical libraries, but in this galaxy alone there are thousands of early TV stations broadcasting right now.


    I enjoy analyzing the wardrobes and hairstyles that are considered fashionable. It¡¯s possible to get a good understanding of a society just by looking at the style of dress, the types of spokespersons, and the facial expressions of newsreaders. After all, TV stations always pick announcers that viewers will respond to most positively.


    Sometimes I just enjoy listening to the cadence of the numerous languages and viewing their body language for a while. Eventually I switch into translation mode and start paying attention to the meanings of the TV shows.


    I start by watching news programs. Humanoid news is actually rather stressful to watch, since so many members of their civilizations have incredibly poor decision-making skills. There are robberies, kidnappings, and appalling murders. These are followed by sensational trials and inhumane punishments. Who damages whom is a constant theme in most humanoid societies. Every flaw or vice is on display.


    Gnomes do none of these things, so it¡¯s a big learning experience for me. There are so many ways for humanoids to go wrong on an individual level. On a societal level it¡¯s even worse.


    Imagine poisoning your own water sources with toxic chemicals. Or mining whole sections of underground rock so your towns collapse into deep pits. Early nuclear power is always a coin toss as to how badly it will turn out.


    Wars are constant, and are clearly the result of past bad decisions resulting in even worse new decisions. A wise human once said that it¡¯s a good thing war is so dreadful, or we would never tire of it. However, I don¡¯t see that they have tired of it yet.This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.


    The list of astonishingly bad decisions goes on and on. These still-primitive societies achieve ever more damaging actions as their technology becomes more evolved than they do.


    Watching news programs for more than a few minutes is just too difficult. Most of these early societies will not mature until they have learned many painful lessons.


    I wave my hand to change stations, and the holographic images shift before me.


    Cooking shows are enjoyable to me. I am always amused by the chefs trying to persuade people that doing something so tedious would be fun. These humanoid beings must eat, so I admire them for being so steadfast in their determination to make and enjoy a tasty meal. Of course, it¡¯s always shocking to see the ways humanoids degrade their planet and cause pain to lesser beings while they produce the ingredients needed for cooking. I guess they feel they have no choice.


    I usually turn to comedies and light entertainment next. The TV shows are not very amusing but are acceptable while I concentrate on carving wood. Situational comedies are at least useful in learning about the everyday lives of families amid the larger society. I amuse myself by looking for gnome statues in the sets of TV shows. It¡¯s surprising how often they turn up, since gnomes are on most planets and humanoids know what they look like.


    I particularly like TV shows about the animals on each world. Animal species on rocky worlds are similarly made, and therefore tend to look the same everywhere in the universes. The body shapes and fur patterns are always amazingly beautiful. Animals tend to interact with their natural environments in similar ways, but sometimes there are truly unique behaviors. I am reminded that I will never know everything about animals, no matter how many centuries I work with them.


    And of course, I enjoy TV shows that display the longing for a civilization to progress to the stars. Most societies on a planet know subconsciously that this is where their future lies. The desire for a better future always gives me hope. I come back to these TV shows again and again to follow how humanoid imaginations respond to the latest achievements in technology.


    My TV hobby gives me a wide-ranging view of humanoid civilizations. I see them at their self-centered worst and courageous best. I often admire these beings who have such painfully obvious limitations, but who keep stubbornly striving. They gradually succeed in making a better home planet or even manage to achieve an advanced place for themselves in the cosmos.


    My family laughs at me and considers this TV hobby to be an odd, acquired taste. I admit I have more of a fascination with humanoids than they do. My gnome relatives consider assignments to work on humanoid planets to be unwelcome and quite enough of an education.


    Maybe my attraction to viewing humanoid development developed from my days working with Adam and Eve so very long ago, when their world was still new. That ancient project taught me more about humanity¡¯s struggles than most gnomes will ever learn, or most humans for that matter.


    I could easily re-experience my time on Earth by taking a quick time-crossing historical visit. I¡¯ve certainly thought about it. But just because I admire the Earth humans for surviving their fall from grace in the Garden of Eden, doesn¡¯t mean I want to look back on that painful time too closely.


    Well, maybe I¡¯ll go back again and maybe I won¡¯t. As the humans say, I¡¯ll decide one of these days.

 Chapter 32: Gnomy enters Zelen into a Garden Planet competition

    Some days seem dull, like nothing new is happening and nothing new or exciting will happen for a very long time. But then it turns out that¡¯s wrong. Suddenly a surprise appears from somewhere out of this world.


    My Far Away Messages file is where I store emails coming in from outside of Zelen¡¯s solar system. It¡¯s full of boring council meeting minutes, project statuses, and intergalactic law updates. Obviously, I don¡¯t check something as dull as this file very often. I was finally glancing through the holographic list, with email topics glowing in the air in front of me, and quickly swatting away correspondence into the computer¡¯s trash bin.


    I paused. Unexpectedly I had found something interesting.


    I came across a Garden Planet Competition taking place in our sector. Any gnome would have perked up instantly at this type of contest, and I certainly did.


    The Garden Planet Competition Committee was looking for the most beautiful and natural planet within our part of the galaxy. Their goal was to preserve the winning planet¡¯s pristine landscapes and to increase tourism. The prize was construction of any type of tourist-specific improvement that we wanted to add. Fortunately, the contest deadline hadn¡¯t passed yet.


    What perfect timing! I had just been complaining to anyone who would listen that I was worried about our planet Zelen. I was afraid it was getting built up with too many humanoids in too many villages, with markets and even small home businesses. Zelen was in danger of losing its natural beauty.


    If we could win this contest we would become a titled Garden Planet. Zelen would then be bound by strict conservation rules. There would be limits to the population and their related projects.


    It¡¯s true that we would be required to allow a much-increased number of tourists every year, but we would receive funds to set up the tourist infrastructure we needed. Hotels or fancy restaurants wouldn¡¯t be required, since the humanoids could stay on their own spaceships and consume most of their meals there. Small grocery stores and cafes plus a few rough cabins and camping places are all that would be needed. The increased spaceship traffic would be worth the trouble in order to secure Zelen¡¯s future.


    If you recall, Zelen was designed according to the rocky world template that had been developed on planet Earth. This meant that Earth¡¯s most scenic ideas had already been included. Zelen is an exceptionally lovely planet overflowing with mountains, glaciers, forests, deserts, tropical areas, beaches and a large ocean. There are a dozen full time gnomes living here, helping to guide the magnificent landscapes that are still being completed in line with the planet¡¯s master plan.


    I thought that, really, all we needed to do was to submit an application full of pictures of wildlife posed in natural scenery. We could easily snap an assortment of photos, holographic images and short videos. Voila, done. Of course we can win this!


    I knew every living being on Zelen would rally to the cause if I could just organize it before the deadline. I got busy and gathered my fellow Zelenistas. I simply coached the amateur photographers to make sure their photo subjects were not stiff and posed but were relaxed and happy. That was really all they needed to know to experiment and do a good job.You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.


    Everything went well.


    To start with, the gnomes volunteered to step into every type of isolated natural area to take photos. All sorts of animal parents were coaxed to pose with their adorable offspring. Deer families with spotted fawns posed against cool misty forests and dew-laden ferns. Moose families on the shores of Long Lake were attractive and majestic. Sweet little bunnies with soft fur and twitching noses could not be cuter standing on their hind legs in flowered meadows.


    Even the ravens were happy to pose in the Grove of the Ancients, with the stately old trees giving off a surprisingly malevolent air to match the brooding birds. Truly, every type of bird and animal in every type of habitat was included.


    The gnomes even managed to pull together some peaceable kingdom type compositions, with predator and prey sitting relaxed and apparently happy together. They simply fed every animal a big meal and waited until they were digesting but not yet asleep. The animals were too full to cause mischief.


    The planet¡¯s diminutive fairies got involved, too. I set up a camera for them to take close-up photos of any tiny natural specimens they wanted, like plants or insects. Fairies cast their own glow, so I didn¡¯t even need to set up lighting. A fairy simply needed to jump on the camera shutter button after setting up their scenic elements.


    Of course, with Phyler in charge there had to be a fair share of pictures with fairies in funny poses, and many group shots. I was a little surprised that the easily distracted group members came up with interesting photos. The images of fairies opening their shimmering silver wings against small white rose blooms were mesmerizing.


    Some of our humanoid friends also got in on the photographic action. These regular visitors were happy to take pictures while they voyaged slowly around the planet in space cruisers, carefully turning their cameras to record sunny views of wide blue ocean, fluffy white clouds, and interesting geological features. These turned out to be beautiful video images, some with the planet juxtaposed against cold empty outer space.


    In fact, it turned out that we had far too many images for the limit of 200 photos, holograms or short videos that we were allowed to submit. Choosing the final pictures was agony. We tried deciding by committee, but that didn¡¯t go well. Everybody had their favorites which were not the same as anybody else.


    Finally I just chose my favorite selections and sent off the packet via instant message delivery. Then we waited¡­and waited. It felt like we waited forever.


    While we waited, the gnomes enthusiastically decided on planetary improvements. We agreed on a long mulch path, running all the way from our already famous rose garden, past the massive trees in the Grove of the Ancients, along the dry side of the low meadow, and ending at an open area in front of Long Lake. That was a perfect area for simple pavilions and picnic tables. It was also a perfect junction for smaller paths to split off and run along the lake for a few miles. Wildlife viewing patios and bird watching blinds would mark the end of the developed areas.


    I just loved the plans. I felt they were simple, easy to maintain, yet very functional. The hiking areas would be interesting enough to keep nature tourists busy and happy for an entire day, but easy enough not to get them lost in the woods. If everything went well, we would decide on other projects to be constructed across Zelen at a later date.


    Now we merely had to win.


    I am sure by now you¡¯ve guessed what finally happened. We won! Zelen won the designation of Garden Planet with all the accompanying benefits. We were delirious with joy. Zelen would remain mostly wild and undeveloped.


    As an extra bonus, I got to work with my wife Jaal on the construction of our paths and buildings. Now I understand why Jaal enjoys being a landscape designer. It¡¯s great fun to set up plans for other people to complete. What a joy it was to make decisions about an area and have off-planet workers come in to do the actual construction. This was the first project where I didn¡¯t need to do any of the hard work myself. I¡¯ll definitely be seeing if I can do that again, or more accurately not do that again, in the future. And try to find a project to complete with Jaal again.

 Chapter 33: The Snowy Owl and the Great Watcher: a short history of Zelen鈥檚 moon

    Like all planets built using the rocky world template, Zelen has a moon, albeit a pale and inhospitable moon, circling in a fixed orbit around its green and living planet.


    Since Zelen is a small planet, it received a small moon. The creator gods didn¡¯t do anything fancy with that moon, like giving it canyons or volcanoes or electric storms, or rings or even exotic life forms. No, they just kept to the basics: a plain white moon with the only decoration being whatever random patterns were created from asteroids hitting its dusty surface over the eons.


    After all, the only two stated purposes of this moon were to have a handy place for researchers to spy on inhabitants of Zelen, and to help stabilize tides and seasons. But as always happens, the humanoid inhabitants are fascinated by their moon. They spend parts of their evenings gazing at the white orb floating in the night sky. They make up myths about it, imagining inhabitants on its dusty surface, or even writing songs about the allure of romantic moonlight.


    I think the waxing and waning of a moon is part of its attraction. Deep down we are never completely sure that the moon is coming back as it narrows down to a waning crescent. There is a small sense of relief when that sliver broadens into a new moon, right on schedule. We always hold something dearer when we have even the slightest doubts about it returning.


    Zelenites are no exception to feeling the fascination of the moon. Indeed, they still revere the ancient myths associated with their moon. They don¡¯t often refer to ¡°the moon,¡± they call their moon the Great Watcher. The Great Watcher has always been home to the Snowy Owl, who was also created by the gods.


    Throughout Zelen¡¯s history, the Snowy Owl and the Great Watcher have had many mystery cults associated with them. Prehistoric cave drawings of the Owl and the Watcher have been uncovered. Remains of ancient temples venerating them have been excavated.


    Ancient texts state that every night the Snowy Owl leaves its home on the Great Watcher to fly over Zelen. The Owl sees everything and knows everything. Given proper rituals and offerings, the Snowy Owl will pass along its wisdom to the humanoids on Zelen. It will advise through omens, dreams and meditations. Snowy owl feathers are greatly prized, since they may have been dropped by the Snowy Owl itself, during one of its nightly flights around Zelen.


    It''s fascinating that the cult of the Snowy Owl and the Great Watcher lasted thousands of years across Zelen¡¯s civilizations with little variation, well into the development of scientific knowledge.


    For good or bad, Zelenites have never lost their fascination with the moon. However, the planet¡¯s residents have come up with modern ideas and uses for the Great Watcher.


    Even before Zelen was officially designated a Garden Planet and tourism increased, the Great Watcher or moon was already a popular tourist destination. Visitors can merely dock their spaceships on its outskirts and take a small runabout into an underground cavern. An elevator deposits sightseers at the museum, and when finished, they head back through the gift shop.If you discover this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.


    Of course, there are no actual Snowy Owl or Great Watcher artifacts. Humanoids couldn¡¯t reach Zelen¡¯s moon to check what was up there until fairly recently. Although by that time people didn¡¯t really believe in the myth, they were still disappointed there was no evidence of an owl living on their moon. The cults celebrating the Snowy Owl and Great Watcher might have been wrong.


    Zelen¡¯s historical cults are actually very interesting. The priests and priestesses didn¡¯t just worship a mythical owl and their moon. They developed the first judiciary system, logged the first history archives, and wrote the first literature. Replicas of these documents have been placed in the lunar museum. Copies of ancient artwork and musical instruments, along with new anthropological books, are for sale in the museum store.


    Museum visitors are respectful of the myth of the Snowy Owl and Great Watcher. However, most visitors find the newer activities on the moon to be much more interesting.


    For instance, the battered remains of the first spy station have been moved to the deepest caverns of the moon. The creator gods themselves visited the spy station a few times, to make sure progress on Zelen and its moon was still on track. Crumbling blueprints with the gods¡¯ inspection notes and signatures are housed in a special climate-controlled glass case.


    A bit closer to the surface of the moon, large caverns are filled with wrecked spaceships, charred equipment and worn-out early defense systems. There are cracked and blackened walls from some of the early battles that took place on the moon.


    There was a time when the galaxy was not as settled as it is now, and there were fights for possession of planets that seemed easy to conquer. Zelen has never had a large population, so empires from around the universe were keen to add such a beautiful, unspoiled planet to their holdings. Fortunately, the creator gods knew how special the little planet was, and how it had too few residents to defend itself. They finally stepped in to shield the planet with strengthened defenses and even some magical spells.


    It was at this time that the fairies agreed to stand as watchers and defenders of Zelen. They still spend quite a bit of time on the fortified moonbase, patrolling and occasionally fighting armed intruders. Even now there are marauding thieves who must be driven off.


    The historic area inside of the moon also has a memorial dedicated to the beings who gave their lives defending Zelen. It is a somber room in a secluded area of the tour, dedicated to quiet thoughts and somber reflections. Some say that the Snowy Owl spends most of its time there now, offering solace and wisdom to grieving visitors.


    Stepping away from those caverns and moving closer to the surface of the moon, there is a large viewing area with telescopes. No trip to outer space would be complete without the fun of learning to manipulate telescopes. People of all ages take home amazing holographic images of the galaxy¡¯s constellations.


    Tourists are not allowed on the surface of the moon due to the sharp dust particles that filter through even the most heavyweight spacesuits. Instead, an enclosed viewing platform gives an incredible view of Zelen. It is quite a beautiful way to end the tour.


    There are still many hidden caverns that are not open to visitors because they are part of active defense systems. These moon craters are full of secret, lethal weapons. The fairies still act as Zelen¡¯s security team and are in charge of these weapons.


    Once upon a time, Zelen¡¯s moon was almost a fairytale, far away and wound with myths of delightful magic. Even now it seems magical, but it¡¯s filled with a deadly sort of enchantment. Still, the humanoids are grateful for their protective moon. They celebrate it and walk in its silvery light. The Snowy Owl still dispenses quiet wisdom to those who will listen. And the luminous moon, the serene Great Watcher, still floats above Zelen.

 Chapter 34: Gnomes were created to be planetary caretakers

    Jaal mentioned that I haven¡¯t actually been writing much about gnomes. A little less about the universes and a little more about gnomes, she requested. As usual, Jaal is correct.


    The story of gnomes goes back to the beginning of the first universe, back to before suns and moons and stars existed, even before time itself had been conceived of as a handy method to judge progress.


    Our cosmic Creator knew that there were many worlds to design but there was not yet anyone able to take care of those worlds. There had to be caretakers with a kind and gentle manner, but also with unshakeable willpower. These caretakers also had to work as designers and quality control experts, having the ability to set into motion all the subtle details of final planning. These beings needed intelligence and discipline, creativity and foresight, all combined with compassion and patience to care for the new flora and fauna.


    With all these requirements in mind, the great Creator of All made gnomes specifically to guide and caretake new planets.


    It was not the creator gods who designed us. No, those divine beings are very wise but they can be shortsighted. We were too important for their sly intrigues and alterations. Instead, the great Creator of All gave gnomes life.


    All magical beings are formed from the natural elements of earth, water, air or fire. Gnomes are elemental spirits formed from the bountiful earth. This means that the gnome life force is concentrated in caring for the growing things on a planet, including trees, flowers and all living beings.


    Gnomes were born to do this work. We seek out the natural area where we want to live. Although most gnomes prefer gardens or woodland or even dense forests, some gnomes live in extreme areas like volcano summits, windswept seashores and bare deserts. Once we choose our homes we stay there as long as possible.


    We laugh at the cartoonish portrayals of gnomes in many parts of the universes, but it can be a bit hurtful. I do admit that in the distant past gnomes were a disorganized group of individuals who hid in the woods and devoted themselves to their own small acreage. Nowadays we are sophisticated citizens in orderly societies. We are proud to use our skills to help guide planets into the future.


    Contrary to uneducated opinion, gnomes are not made too short to be effective in our work. No, we are the perfect size. Plants and animals love that we match their heights and can get so close to them. We can whisper to the animals and hear their replies. Our short, sturdy stature and lovely nut-brown colorings allow the beings in our care to quickly recognize us as friends. We can be inconspicuous and easily stay hidden within a hedgerow if necessary. We can become large in order to alter the wind and weather in local areas as needed, protecting our beloved plants and wild creatures.Love what you''re reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on.


    I have mentioned previously how gnomes are closely involved with reclaiming damaged or ruined worlds. We make sure that planetary councils realize that any neglected solar system can become a troubled place where planets will be plundered and left destroyed, open to any scavenger or bandit. The planets themselves cry out in pain and grief at this degradation. Repairing and reclaiming these planets is emotionally difficult to those involved in the project. It¡¯s also time-consuming and very costly.


    Our schoolchildren learn about reclamation projects, and we discuss various completed projects. Personally, I enjoy teaching students about planetary reclamation and the difficult work of planning and terraforming. It makes our children realize how much easier and joyful it is to set up a new planet and keep it in good order.


    This type of discussion is not only educational but a good way to determine which students are interested in traditional gnome occupations. Our teachers and parents are always surprised to find that now and then a student wants to seek an alternative life.


    As you know, most gnomes want to work with plants and animals. It is why we were created and it is our destiny. Yet every now and then a gnome is born with a restless nature. Not all gnomes enjoy forests and meadows and gardens and seashore. In fact, working with plants bores them to tears. They also don¡¯t like being around animals, may even be afraid of them.


    We know this type of gnome will not be content to stay in their woodland garden. You can see in their eyes that they will keep looking until they fulfill a different calling.


    Developing an unusual or unique occupation is acceptable for gnomes, but finding that occupation requires self-knowledge, creativity and hard work. Students may end up finding satisfaction in an occupation as down-to-earth as a blacksmith or government administrator or land surveyor. Or they may end up in an out-of-this-world occupation like space shuttle pilot, logistics specialist or even assistant to a creator god.


    Gnomes admire other gnomes who have the audacity and imagination to succeed in unusual occupations. However, some gnomes combine the longing for new and different careers with another odd trait: a desire to work with beings beyond the level of plants and animals. These gnomes often decide to start taking care of humanoids instead.


    Most regular gnomes find this decision to be odd and puzzling. To be honest, it puzzles me too.


    I don¡¯t know why anybody would want to become a specialist in humans and humanoids. You become part of a team of celestial advisors, all working in the background to advance each soul. The angels and guides set the rules for everything that must be done. A gnome devolves into more of a daily monitor to see how things are going rather than a manager or planner. And you must be so careful that the humanoids don¡¯t sense you helping, and you must be even more sure that you don¡¯t help beyond a certain point. Either mistake would violate cosmic rules by infringing on their free will.


    The entire work environment is stifling. Who wants to make a career of that drudgery? No, having to work with ungrateful and spoiled humanoids is too challenging for me. Plants and animals are so much better.


    Anyway, that¡¯s enough of gnome history and our professions, whether traditional or unusual. I realize that gnomes seem like they labor at their careers constantly and above all else, but truly we don¡¯t. The next chapters will explain a bit about how we enjoy our lives: family, music, parties, and weddings.

 Chapter 35: Nothing more fun than someone else鈥檚 wedding

    As with every culture, gnome weddings seem designed to whirl the future bride and groom into a confusing muddle: rigid societal roles, prolonged tests of each family¡¯s expectations, judgement on how well the marital couple knows wedding etiquette, and whether the couple¡¯s relationship is strong enough not to dissolve under the pressure.


    If the engaged couple pass those tests, they will be allowed to proceed further and cautiously pick out suitable wedding day selections that must be attractive and stylish, yet timeless in design. Well, that is, the couple may be allowed to select from a palette of wedding day choices as long as the outfits, ceremony and reception plans aren¡¯t too fiercely modern or unconventional. The bride¡¯s family generally has the last word on that.


    Let¡¯s not even mention the money thrown into paying for this anxiety-producing social event, or the time and heated discussions involved to get all that planning done. It¡¯s a wonder any young couple has the courage to plan a wedding.


    Gnome societies are matrilinear, so a groom marries into the wife¡¯s family. He traditionally takes the wife¡¯s clan name. I became ¡°Eden of the Lily Clan, husband of Jaal.¡± Any existing names may still be used in a gnome¡¯s career. I am still known as ¡°Eden of the Round Woods¡± on planet Zelen. In the local society on my home planet, my clan name always takes precedence.


    In times long past, the groom was presented to his future mother-in-law just before the start of the wedding ceremony. She had to officially accept him into her branch of the clan.  Of course this should have been settled in advance, and probably was, but the bride and groom had the fun of surrounding themselves with their own groups of rowdy friends who could loudly pressure the mother-in-law as needed.


    If the mother-in-law said no even after the friends¡¯ loud haranguing, the fun ceased and the rejection became real. The friend groups would carry the groom out and transport him to his home for a castoff fianc¨¦ revelry. This pity party would make his rejection as painless as possible.


    The entire pre-marriage acceptance ritual has been dropped, but the idea of large groups of friends watching over the ceremony remains. Nowadays these friends merely sign the wedding scroll as witnesses, using the traditional goose feather pen and blackberry ink.


    Each clan has thousands of marriage scrolls, going back through the ages. The scrolls have been crucial in working out our detailed genealogy charts. It¡¯s true that not everyone gets married, and not every child is born in wedlock, but there are other societal records to fill in those areas. When I say that gnomes are all cousins, it¡¯s true. We can recite exact familial relationships down to the hundredth cousin.


    A marriage is for a single lifetime only. The couple may get married again during future lives, but every marriage is new and unique to that reincarnated lifetime. No soul ever gets locked into an obligation from a previous life. Even if two souls do decide to reincarnate as gnomes and remarry, they may decide to be born with different personalities, new clans and even into an entirely different universe.


    It hardly seems necessary to note, but of course there are same sex marriages. These gnomes have enjoyable weddings and successful marriages just like anyone else. Gnome societies generally don¡¯t support exotic marriages like threesomes or extremely different humanoid races. We have a simple society and complicated relationships tend not to succeed in it. But these complex relations are not banned, they are just recorded as not traditionally wedded. They are welcome to marry according to the larger society¡¯s rules wherever they may live.This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.


    And obviously divorce exists in gnome society. Each ex-spouse is encouraged to reflect upon his or her role in the demise of the marriage in order to increase their self-awareness. If no reconciliation can be reached, they may then divorce and move forward separately.


    In any case, gnome weddings are great fun. Even Phyler and some of her fairy friends have attended Jaal¡¯s and my weddings during many different lifetimes and had a great time.


    Gnome weddings are never stiff and fancy. There are no lacy white bridal costumes and no uncomfortable groom tuxedoes. Instead, the bridal couple dresses however they like. Sometimes the bridal couple will wear soft, richly embroidered robes handed down through the generations. Some wear lightweight linens and laces. Some wear handsome new outfits that become part of the wardrobe and are worn to other social events for years afterward. Others just keep their look casual, which is especially popular for small outdoor weddings on a beach or mountaintop. In all cases, comfortable garments for a long day of ceremony, feasts and parties are expected.


    Wedding receptions are down-to-earth, full of dancing, singing, drinking and food. It is a community day, full of joy. There are few gifts, since gnome households need little. But attending a wedding means reinforcing lifelong family ties which bring a sense of belonging and enjoyment to all.


    Back in olden times the bridesmaids would actually go out to gather nuts, pick fruit, harvest vegetables, and prepare the feast. Wedding foods have not changed much since then: delicate soups made from early squashes, baked vegetables, simmered greens, and fruit pies, all decorated with edible blooms. Sweet or savory spices and just a touch of local honey impart tasty flavors.


    Those fine maidens of olde would even bake a wedding cake. The cakes were simple and rather heavy pound cakes. Nowadays, the bridal party rarely assembles the feast. We have caterers to make and serve meals, and bakers who specialize in wedding cakes.


    We still love our wedding cakes, but they are made from airy white flour and highest quality white sugar. They are not the overly sweet and layered confections humans would make, but are single-layered, fragrant and fluffy cakes with lightly whipped frosting. The emphasis is on a delicious flavor, whether traditional vanilla, a floral essence or fruit and nuts. A wedding cake is the most decadent thing we eat in our lifetimes, so it is always very special.


    Since gnomes normally don¡¯t eat often, and therefore don¡¯t cook much, merely having the chance to sample such a variety of foods is a treat. Gnome wedding menus are reflective of the choices available on the planet where they reside, so it can be a delicious learning experience.


    Another attraction for many gnomes is the selection of hard ciders that have been pressed and stored in oak casks. Tapping these barrels always brings a round of applause. Drinking, dancing, talking, and light wedding games keep the evening moving into the early morning.


    The Earth artist Pieter Bruegel the Elder really nails typical gnome style with his paintings of peasant weddings. We have the same sense of fun and community, but bear in mind that we are not actually peasants. Many of the guests are highly educated. Intense discussions of agronomy, botany and zoology will be going on at the reception. Simple lifestyles do not mean simple minds.


    Dear to all gnomes¡¯ hearts are the wedding¡¯s decorations. Clan medallions are displayed on the head table, surrounded by garlands and colorful bouquets. The bride¡¯s clan flowers are always tucked somewhere into her bouquet. The groom wears the bride¡¯s floral clan fabric in his tie or scarf. A mere glance at the flowered border on a guest¡¯s shirt or cloak will tell you all you need to know about that guest¡¯s heritage and family history.


    There are no sweet pale pink and lacy white decorations in the style that has unfortunately taken over the galaxy. Instead, there are warm yellows and purples, or deep orange fall colors, or anything that emphasizes the bounty of nature. There might even be flowers from plant species that were bred specifically to show off blooms on table centerpieces, proudly unveiled just for that wedding day.


    Gnome weddings are absolutely a blast, as the humans say. Ah, but I haven¡¯t even mentioned the ceremony, music and traditional games yet. And I look forward to telling you about Jaal¡¯s and my wedding day

 Chapter 36: Music and dancing and parties and weddings

    Since gnomes often work alone or in small groups off-planet, we love the occasional large party, or even better, a wedding with the most delicious food and special wedding cakes available. There are few gnomes who would miss an enjoyable gnome social event or wedding.


    Gnomes are all one species but we don¡¯t have just one home planet. There are many planets populated by gnomes around the universes. Therefore, these types of large gatherings have a mix of gnomes from many planets. A gnome party is not only great for making new friends, but we also get to visit with relatives from our clans. Since we merely have to instantly transport to attend an event, there are frequent gnome gatherings.


    We always have lots of music and dancing at our get-togethers. This includes the usual types of peasant dancing, like maypole dances, square dances and line dances for all ages.


    Regrettably, flirting doesn¡¯t come smoothly or naturally to most gnomes, so the adolescents definitely need a little help. The dance floor is a perfect place to practice their courting skills in a low-stress situation. The youngsters get to meet many youths and learn to recognize that little ¡°spark¡± between two gnomes that might eventually signal the start of a successful relationship.


    One dance favorite is called ¡°Sailing to Carmalie.¡±


    This is a circle dance, helpful for young adolescents who are too shy to talk to their crush. A person¡¯s name is called during a song, and the blushing young gnome chosen goes into the middle of the circle with the calling partner. They whirl around together for a bit while everyone claps and sings this song:


    I sail on the running river


    I sail on the open sea


    I sail on the wide blue ocean


    I sail to the town of Carmalie


    To Carmalie I go, to Carmalie I go,


    My true love for to see


    She walks on the lonely footpath


    That¡¯s where she waits for me


    My sweet (name) waits for me, she (or he) waits for me


    I know she waits for me


    But if she¡¯s gone with another fellow (or girl)


    Then back to my sailing ship for me


    Another true love will come to meSupport the creativity of authors by visiting Royal Road for this novel and more.


    Another true love for to see


    There¡¯s a great big wide ocean


    I¡¯ll find a new love to wait for me


    Then the first caller drops out, and the gnome who was called gets to choose and call the next partner. It goes on and on until everyone is chosen. There is a lot of embarrassed laughter and commotion. The prolonged interaction really cements new friendships.


    To be honest, this type of song serves as a good gauge to see who may have been sneaking glasses of hard cider. Any unsteady adolescent needs to be scolded and watched more closely.


    Everyone pretends to ignore the occasional young couple sneaking off together, walking along the footpaths by the great big wide ocean. Older and more mature couples just happen to walk in the same direction as the youths, casually strolling, talking loudly. After all, even though these adolescents think they can behave like fully grown adults, they definitely may not. It¡¯s good to remind them of that fact but not completely ruin their evening.


    Gnomes often meet their future spouses at these large gnome gatherings, and especially during the group dances. Of course, Jaal and I met during our years on Earth, but we still participated in this type of silly and fun dance until we got married. Then as a newly mature married couple, we no longer participated in singles groups and dances. If we had dared show up among the single gnomes, we would have been expected to be chaperones. We moved to the more enjoyable community dances instead.


    The younger children always get overtired from their long day of playing and snacking. They are taken in hand by volunteers to calm them with some familiar, soothing activities. Walking in a long line with synchronized arm motions, then ending with bows and curtsies, is always fun for the younger gnomes as they wind down.


    The next song is often the last song the children hear before they fall asleep on their blankets:


    Lay you down and quietly rest


    Dream of the meadow around you


    Green plants are so happy to see you


    Grass welcomes you with a soft carpet to lie on


    Sweet smelling clover tickles your nose


    Violets shyly raise their heads to gaze at you


    Daisy petals reach out to lightly touch you


    Hollyhocks show off their colors


    Rosebuds perfume the air


    And the trees whisper in the breeze


    They smile and lull you to sleep


    Watching over you and singing lullabies


    Unlike some societies, our children are always included in large celebrations. We design activities specifically for them. They have fun but we also start teaching proper behaviors and cherished traditions at an early age.


    Parents end up talking about every stage of their children¡¯s lives: what they are studying, what hobbies they have taken up, and eventually their careers. Then the ever-popular topic of who is marrying whom and who has decided to have a baby is next. Their homes and jobs are also thoroughly reviewed.


    The merriment always gets louder and the singing more off-key as the local cider makes its rounds. Discussion gradually morphs into the area of who is getting older and who unfortunately has passed on to their next life. Remember that gnomes can just step out of their molecules to end their lives when they feel like they have gotten too old to function. Death after a long life is not a sad event, but the departing soul will be missed.


    Wider topics like politicians and councils and changing societies are debated as the festive day draws to a close. There are few subjects that are considered sensitive or rude in gnome society. When everybody knows most everyone else, there are no secrets to stay hidden.


    Gnome planets are carefully hidden within warped space fields and shielded from any kind of spaceship sensor. Adversarial species or simply curious travelers pass very close to a gnome planet and never notice it. That kind of security, along with powerful plasma weapons, makes us feel safe enough to plan large outdoor activities in an often-dangerous universe. The confidence in our security makes our celebrations extra special. Unfortunately, many planets and species do not have such luxury.


    Once our day is done, we all promise to get together more often. Sometimes we actually do. We say goodbye until the next get-together, and transport our families safely home.

 Chapter 37: Jaal and Gnomy鈥檚 wedding and their trip to the Honeymoon Planet

    Ever since we met on Earth so long ago, Jaal and I have married frequently in our reincarnated lives. We were so in love the very first time we got married that we felt like we were floating.


    Jaal had a simple but exquisitely tatted white dress and veil made for herself. It was quite an extravagance, knowing it would go straight into her clothes chest at the end of the day and she wouldn¡¯t wear it again. It has since been borrowed by relatives, but it has always looked best on her. I know I laugh at the gnomes who get married in what I consider an overly frilly style, but when the time came, I couldn¡¯t imagine Jaal in anything but lace. She looked exquisite.


    We married in early summer, so her flowers featured white daisies, pale yellow roses and baby¡¯s breath, with a few lavender-tipped lilies tucked in the bouquet to honor Jaal¡¯s clan.


    I know men usually don¡¯t get very excited about their wedding outfits, but I felt quite smart in my white wool shirt, fashioned with a raised band collar, worn loose over matching pants. My long vest featured thin vertical stripes in Jaal¡¯s clan colors.


    We had decided on a fragrant vanilla wedding cake with the very top of the cake colored with a species of lavender that not only gave a beautiful color, but gave a hint of lemony-lavender flavor. The cake baker, who was one of my many cousins, added a sprinkling of tiny lavender blooms across the top of the cake.


    She also added two carved and painted figures to top the cake, with fresh flowers tucked around them. They looked just like us! Even the colors were perfect.


    As per tradition, I was presented to Jaal¡¯s mother just before the wedding so she could bestow final approval for Jaal to marry me. Our two groups of friends surrounded us in a mock protective style, but there was more laughing and chattering than serious worry about being allowed to marry. Indeed, my mother-in-law behaved admirably at our wedding and in fact ever after.


    My own parents were also pleased by our nuptials. They have always loved Jaal and thought we were an excellent match.


    With parents, close relatives, and our two groups of friends, there was quite a throng on the wedding platform. Everyone crowded in closely. Jaal and I stepped forward from the group to pledge all the days of this life to each other, amid much cheering and drinking of toasts.


    It would be incorrect to say that gnomes have religious rites. Gnomes don''t so much have a religion as they have a celebration of being part of the Creator. We are simply reminded to live in awe of that fact in our wedding ceremonies.


    Jaal and I swore to uphold our gnomish duties, meaning we must take care of all living beings, animals and plants, in every realm on every world. We also swore to take care of each other, our family, and all gnomes everywhere. Our community elders witnessed our vows and approved the signing of the scrolls.


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    Our wedding reception was traditional, with the usual feasting, drinking and entertainments. I¡¯ve heard that a tradition is what you do when you can¡¯t think of anything better. For us there really didn¡¯t seem to be a better way to celebrate a wedding that joins two lives and two clans, than with family, good friends and highly satisfying food and drink.


    The celebration lasted until dawn started to streak the sky. We enjoyed ourselves so much that the guests kept lingering. As much as we wanted to spend time alone together, it was hard to leave the affectionate assemblage of friends and family. Eventually the party wound down and it really was time to leave. We were showered with fresh, fragrant flower blooms as the group waved goodbye. Then we winked out of sight.


    As with many couples, we spent our wedding trip at the Honeymoon Planet.


    The Honeymoon Planet is quite beautiful and isolated, and seems like it was perfectly created just for newly married beings who are looking for a bit of privacy and relaxation. It is a world consisting of gently sloping white beaches, calm blue oceans with exceptional snorkeling, and scenic woodland trails leading to exquisite waterfalls. The concierges have tucked secluded outdoor hammocks here and there for visitors who want to rest during their explorations. When hunger calls, refreshments can be delivered to the hammocks or sent to a private cabin.


    The cabins are simple bamboo structures on stilts, where newlyweds can sit on quiet terraces with gorgeous views or step inside and roll up rope ladders for complete privacy.


    The Honeymoon Planet is a delightful place for newlyweds to visit after a stressful wedding. It¡¯s not only popular with humanoid couples, but it has areas just for us magical small folks. Everyone enjoys meeting new species as they stroll the trails or dine in any of the hundreds of restaurants.


    We didn¡¯t remain only on the Honeymoon Planet during our visit. We took advantage of our ability to instantly transport anywhere and took many short trips. We visited a rumbling volcano planet where we dodged fast-moving lava flows; we collected souvenir diamonds from a planet where skies rained minerals; and we took a spaceship tour that got daringly close to a black hole. We visited a planet with the deepest caves in the universe and observed the strange, sightless creatures who lived there; lastly, we took a tasting tour of a winery planet that produces the most exquisite wines in the universe, where we sipped wine and tasted exotic cheeses made from the milk of rare animals from around the cosmos.


    Then, just in time before we reached exhaustion from our busy trip, we returned to our home planet.


    Jaal and I had planned a new stone house to have a permanent home to live in when we weren¡¯t working on other planets. I hadn¡¯t managed to complete it and was feeling a little embarrassed to show the unfinished shell to Jaal. However, the best wedding present of all was waiting for us: our relatives had gotten together for a house raising. The house was not completed when we left but it was finished and furnished when we got home. There was even food in the pantry if we felt like eating.


    Gnomes always make sure that a project is finished and ready when it is needed. It¡¯s one of our best traits. Our new home was a fine start to anyone¡¯s wedded life.


    We were just as happy every time we got married in every new lifetime, but there is nothing like the enjoyment of a first wedding and starting a first lifetime together.


    Now that I¡¯ve enjoyed reminiscing about our first wedding, it¡¯s probably a good time to start talking about our next project: our children.

 Chapter 38: The energies of the universes

    Jaal and I have had children in many of our gnome lifetimes. Watching them grow up to become loving, moral and successful gnomes is very rewarding.


    Gnomes are somewhat similar to humans in how we live and how we raise our children. However, our lives are much longer than humans: about 1200 years on average instead of 100 years. Our childhood and adolescent years are only slighter longer than humans. We are considered adults by age 35.


    As with humans, deciding to have a child is a big event for the parents and their extended families. Female gnomes generally give birth to a single child, or sometimes twins. Gnome couples may have just two or three children during their long lifetimes. The parents often wait 50 to 100 years between children.


    Our society dictates that both parents leave their jobs for twenty years or so after each baby is born. This means we could have two or three twenty-year breaks in our careers, depending on how large our family becomes. During these breaks in working, the entire extended family spends a large amount of time together on whichever gnome planet the family has decided to call home. The twenty-year work gap is a lovely family time spent helping the child or children grow.


    Raising children is a special and rare time, so it is the parents¡¯ focus until the children reach the age to begin university or other training. The parents and grandparents could easily fall into an intense ¡°helicopter parenting¡± style, but that is strongly frowned on in our culture. The offspring eventually graduate and now it is their turn to find jobs, then possibly marry and have their own children.


    Not all souls who incarnate as gnomes will stay as gnomes. There are many beings who spend just one or two lifetimes as gnomes. It¡¯s the best way to receive a hands-on, short training on how to take care of planets. Just a few lifetimes may be enough knowledge for that being¡¯s purposes.


    There are some souls who try out gnome life to see if it suits them. Being a gnome is rather specialized, so they may end up moving on to other incarnations quickly. There is no requirement to stay or go, except to set up whatever feels like the best option for the next lifetime.


    This mix of many personalities with varied goals is the best way to keep our gnome worlds from becoming too insular and narrow-minded. A balance of old souls who have already decided on their pathways and new souls who are still making decisions allows everyone to learn from each other.


    Everyone incarnating as gnomes will, of course, go to school. Remember that it is only on Earth where human beings do not remember their previous lifetimes. We are able to easily review previous knowledge and increase our education with each lifetime.


    Gnomes aren¡¯t required to have much education after their teenage years. If they prefer, they can live happy and productive lives with just some basic classes on natural sciences. That¡¯s enough education for gnomes to have long careers as caretakers for the plants and animals of any world.


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    If gnomes opt to advance their knowledge and experience, they could eventually become responsible for designing and managing an entire complicated and multifaceted project. They could even become part of a team responsible for an entire solar system instead of just a single world. At that point, it is possible to move into a sophisticated and prestigious career working directly with the creator gods.


    However, before children can even dream of trying any of these professions, there is a skill they must work on during each lifetime. It must be mastered before moving into any planetary fieldwork.


    The skill that must be attained is the ability to effortlessly manipulate the energies of the universes. This is learned by playing a schoolroom exercise called the creation game. Children must become not only proficient, but learn to keep a high level of concentration for hours at a time.


    The training is set up as a fun game, but it is not a simple game.


    The first step of the creation game is learning to create triangles, circles and squares in the air. Children must use only one arm to summon the energy and turn it into smoke shapes. Next, the children must create these smoke shapes using only their minds. It takes years to master these skills.


    The next step is to make the smoke shapes travel, change size and go through each other. After succeeding at that challenge, a combination of directing smoke, fire and multi-colored visual effects must be mastered.


    An older child who has attained full mastery will be able to summon the pure energy of a universe and use it in whatever manner is desired. Universal energy has an infinity of uses. There are entire textbooks and classes dedicated to that topic.


    This final stage of mastery is not achieved until the child reaches mid-teens or older. It is a proud day for the family when a teenager reaches this highest accomplishment level. The son or daughter can now easily be accepted as an apprentice or choose a prestigious university.


    In this lifetime Jaal and I have two daughters: Liveta and Rinja. We have proudly watched them succeed at learning to manipulate universal energy. They have inherited their love of the natural world from Jaal and me, and we are so proud that both have achieved advanced degrees in biology and chemistry.


    Liveta uses her universal energy skills to manipulate molecules and edit genes in greenhouse plants. She designs the most suitable plants for each new terraforming project. She works on the molecular biology of plants and soils within her elaborate laboratory, instead of working on a planet.


    Rinja is a landscape design professional who directs planetary renovation projects. She¡¯s also a specialist in evaluating how well the repaired and upgraded landscapes are meeting expectations.


    I think Liveta and Rinja are very much like Jaal and even me. Jaal is an expert at organizing her work so she can smoothly take advantage of universal energies, instead of using her own muscle power to complete any landscape project. I am not as creative and dedicated to my work as Jaal, but I like to think I¡¯ve passed along the perseverance and adaptability learned during my early hardscrabble temporary jobs. Some of those jobs were more successful than others, but that¡¯s how life goes. I am happy working in the Round Woods now.


    I¡¯ve often told Liveta and Rinja about the difficult Earth years Jaal and I spent working on the dinosaur project, and that I later spent in the Garden of Eden. We only succeeded at our work because our gnome groups could harness the energies of the universe to complete all of our projects. They roll their eyes a bit at hearing about Earth so much, but I think they will eventually treasure those long-ago stories. After all, those stories are now legends, and still famous to this very day.

 Chapter 39: Decline of a planet: case study Earth

    I have often chaperoned school trips for our children throughout their educational years. These school trips are easy to arrange since gnomes have the ability to instantaneously transport ourselves around the universes.


    Merely visiting a location within the same time period where the travelers reside does not require special permission on most worlds. Galaxy Guides and star maps are all any tourists need to safely travel within their own universe and their usual time period.


    However, time travel is a more difficult proposition.


    Surprisingly, time travel is not dangerous. Teachers and students merely generate individual protective time pods around themselves. If a leak or problem is ever detected, the pods simply return the users to their home planet within the correct time period.


    Time pods keep time travelers slightly out of phase when they are roaming, just enough for them to walk around and invisibly observe a place and people. The slightly different phase means they cannot be seen by the general population. Experienced time traveling adult gnomes can keep their physical bodies out of phase through simple concentration, but that gets tiring. Pods are more comfortable.


    The pods have some other important advantages, too: they keep the occupant from not only being seen in the time period being visited, but also from being heard. It likewise keeps the visitor from touching or changing anything.


    Without pods, there would be grave danger of timeline changes. This is more likely than you would think. Most visitors do not plan to change decisions or events, but the temptation can become overwhelming. There is a reason for this, as you will see.


    Before time traveling, our students learn about specific time periods or civilizations or entire planets. They thoroughly study the subject, following a civilization through its rise and inevitable decline. Students read, attend lectures and take tests.


    When the students pass their preliminary requirements, they are rewarded by actual visits to the civilizations they are studying. We don¡¯t just read about history, our students actually go to the worlds we are studying and see firsthand what happened there.


    Researchers and students alike react strongly when they see the actual individuals, politicians, and societies. They have so far only seen rather dry and factual presentations of historical events. They become quite angry when they see the foolish deeds being perpetrated by a planet¡¯s inhabitants. The actions are so clearly not in the society¡¯s best interest that it¡¯s astonishing. It¡¯s extremely difficult to observe a scene when you so badly want to stop the self-sabotage. However, there are very severe penalties for any sort of time vandalism. Being a student is not an excuse.


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    This explains why the time travel pods are essential when time traveling. Even adults can get overly excited about what is really no more than just a play or a movie to us. It¡¯s useless to get caught up in a scene because as mere viewers we must not change anything. Still, many people forget they are just watching and are not in fact participating.


    There is a very interesting but rather distressing course that is wildly popular. It is called ¡°Decline of a planet: case study Earth¡±. It follows the tangled threads of societies, religion and politics of Earth¡¯s history from the earliest empires to its sad but logical present-day condition.


    The arcs of civilization on Earth are very compelling. We track Earth¡¯s rise from the start of the earliest Akkadian Empire. The next chapters cover the development of Assyrian, Egyptian and Roman civilizations. We are always fascinated by the ingenuity that allowed these great civilizations with their grand buildings to be built so early in human development.


    As the historical records move forward in time, growing populations cause new problems. Advanced technologies solve some issues but create severe environmental complications.


    Students find the constant despoiling of Earth very distressing. Natural disasters, overpopulation, overuse of resources, lack of education, dysfunctional decisions, and frequent wars throughout human history are difficult for gnomes to study. Visiting Earth as the final part of the course is fascinating, but can make us shout out and bang our fists in frustration. This is where the time travel pods are important to keep us from being seen or heard by the planetary inhabitants.


    Despite our discomfort throughout the Earth case study, we think learning about the powerful examples of mismanagement are important for our students¡¯ education. Theories of planetary development and planning are compared to reality. The bad decisions and unintended consequences of societies are exposed and analyzed quite mercilessly.


    Tracing the terrible examples of Earth¡¯s misguided priorities and decisions are part of our educations. Kingdoms and empires and democracies all start with great promise, but can end in a downfall rife with catastrophe and disaster. It can be quite shocking and agonizing for us to see it, but learning this history is essential to avoiding mistakes in our own futures.


    Fortunately, all is not lost on Earth. The current inhabitants are working as a single group to undo millennia of damage to the planet. Reclaiming Earth will take time, however. That battered gem of a planet deserves all their efforts and more.


    Learning about failed civilizations is important when gnomes are creating new and hopefully successful worlds. It helps teach our children to value careful planning, personal humility and strict honesty in our work and within our own gnome civilizations.

 Chapter 40: Bored teens and used Earth cars

    Ah, teenagers. They are the same on every world. Even teenagers who can instantly transport to anywhere in the universes want to buy flashy, super cool sky runabouts to travel around their planet. An economical, simple means of transportation is not enough for them. No, they want eye-catching personal sky cruisers to impress their friends.


    This desire brings together all of a teenager¡¯s typical traits: complete ignorance of a fair price for a runabout, fanciful thinking about how much money is required to keep a runabout running about, a corresponding lack of those funds, and an easy disregard of the older generation¡¯s advice.


    This is where Earth comes in. For such a backward planet in an isolated backwater location, Earth¡¯s name comes up on other worlds more than you would think. Teenagers from these other worlds are fascinated with two forbidden things associated with Earth: in-your-face selling techniques, which are a complete novelty to non-Earth humanoids, and used cars. Both of these themes come together in the practice of used car salespeople doing their job of selling used cars.


    Bold selling practices are just the opposite of typical restrained interactions of buyers and sellers in most civilized areas of the cosmos. Humanoids don¡¯t act this aggressively anywhere else. Residents of any galaxy have to interact with a huge variety of species from anywhere within the infinite universes, so speaking softly and dealing fairly are the best ways to avoid conflict. Many an intergalactic war has started with a simple misunderstanding turning into an extended grudge.


    Parents don''t like their children learning brash attitudes and aggressive actions from Earth residents. Therefore, their kids are banned from visiting Earth until they are mature enough not to pick up bad habits.


    However¡­


    Bored teenagers from all over the universes break intergalactic laws to zip over to Earth in their parents¡¯ long-range runabouts. The kids disguise themselves as adult humans just so they can experience the crass selling techniques, and then enjoy giving back a little of what they¡¯ve gotten.


    It¡¯s great fun for teenagers to bring disguises and bars of gold to Earth. After getting some suspicious stares and often some police presence, they panic and leave quickly. The boldest teenagers upgrade to better disguises, realistic drivers¡¯ licenses and actual Earth cash, then visit the vast acres of used car lots again. They fake-casually stroll through the used vehicle retail businesses to try their chances at facing off against aggressive salespeople again.


    This is actually a forbidden hobby due to the possibility of being recognized as not exactly human. The kids don¡¯t care. The parents think no real harm is done, and that it¡¯s educational. They often don¡¯t get too angry, except on planets where police issue monetary fines for the offense of trying to buy a car on Earth. The parents suddenly become very strict as they see monetary units departing their bank account.


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    Almost all parents insist that Earth¡¯s autos be purchased and not stolen. Pilfered cars could cause some serious blowback from any advanced planet¡¯s policing entities.


    The mere fact that this type of suspicious purchasing activity isn¡¯t reported by humans working in Earth¡¯s used car lots doesn¡¯t mean it¡¯s not happening or that the more astute salespeople don¡¯t recognize it. It just means that they don¡¯t want to give up their golden geese that lay golden eggs of easy money.


    Now it¡¯s true that aliens from other worlds, and especially teenage aliens, are not very good at haggling over prices but they have the big advantage of being able to read a salesperson¡¯s mind. This means they actually do know that the salespeople are trying to get rid of what dealers call lemons. It offsets the disadvantage of having limited understanding of prices and whether a car has mechanical problems.


    These buyers don¡¯t really care if the cars do have issues. They will rip out the entire engine and mechanicals anyway, in favor of an advanced extraterrestrial upgrade. The salesperson¡¯s overcharge is really considered a tip so that if the kid comes back to shop again, they will be eagerly welcomed back as a regular, albeit not very smart, customer.


    The teenagers bring the vehicles back to their home planets and work on them in their garages. With the help of robot mechanics and integrated repair manuals, they upgrade the vehicles into little runabout sky cruisers. These aren¡¯t intergalactic spaceships but just fun vehicles to fly through the skies of a local planet. The original engine has been removed and an anti-gravity propulsion system installed. So instead of the old Earth pastime of comparing V-8 engines, they now compare the speed and maneuverability of their shiny new power sources.


    A Detroit-made classic muscle car that¡¯s been upgraded into a sky cruiser is a highly prized possession on many worlds. These classics have a very high value even on planets that rarely use money. Therefore, fixing and flipping cars can be not only a cool hobby, but also a highly profitable hobby. Some teenagers enjoy buying, upgrading and selling the runabouts so much they continue with the hobby their entire lives.


    There is one automobile that is most in demand: a 1981 DeLorean sold along with a VHS tape of ¡°Back to the Future.¡± It¡¯s almost irresistible to a collector of classic Earth runabouts. There are collectors who specialize in cars like Porsches, Shelbys, Pontiac GTOs, Camaros, and the like. They repaint the cars using strictly original paint formulas, then polish them to their highest beauty.


    I would have thought car flippers would upgrade the interiors into something sleek, super modern and sumptuously comfortable, but apparently that would lower the car¡¯s value. They upgrade the mechanical parts of the car but go to great lengths to keep the interiors as original as possible.


    Other civilizations of course have invented automobiles, but somehow, they never made beautiful cars like you find on Earth. The aerodynamic designs and chrome embellishments are much admired intergalactically. You can hardly go to an advanced humanoid-populated planet and not see some of these prized sky cruisers zipping through the atmospheres. In fact, Detroit, Michigan and a few other locations on Earth have become popular stops for time-traveling tourists anxious to see the original automobiles and the factories where they were made.

 Chapter 41: The decision was clear

    I had just returned from a conference concerning the fate of a small rocky world that had been developing nicely on its own. However, sensors showed that it was directly in the path of a rogue planet heading straight for it. The creator gods and other conference attendees had to decide whether to let the collision happen and allow the catastrophic results to play out naturally, or whether to nudge the encroaching planet aside.


    It¡¯s not as easy as it sounds to push a rogue planet into a new path. The technology exists, but it takes precise calculations to move it exactly. The new path has to be planned perfectly all the way across the universe. Otherwise, we can¡¯t be sure that the planet being nudged won¡¯t hit a new target. After all, we can¡¯t stop one catastrophe just to set up a new one.


    And yes, I could tell you stories about close calls and even collisions after rogue planets have been redirected and not properly tracked. Once the calculations have been approved, technicians in the redirect department will not look at the projected path again. Local computer monitoring systems tracking galaxywide trajectories should be noticing any course problems as the planet moves through space.


    The conference attendees decided that the first step would be for me to gather information by physically visiting the threatened planet. Much of their decision would depend on whether there was anything unique to the planet. If there was nothing outstanding, it would be allowed to be destroyed as the long-term forecasts projected. Only an actual visit would give enough solid information to make a decision.


    I traveled to the unpopulated and never before visited planet, circling it in my personal sky runabout to record some preliminary data before landing.


    The planet was mostly ocean, and the landmasses showed as simple granite rocks. The sensor sweep did not show any chlorophyll and oxygen in the atmosphere. That meant there would be no plants on the surface and therefore no animal life either.


    I named the isolated and desolate planet Little Gray Rock in my reports, simply because the name amused me.


    The bare rocks looked a little shimmery, which puzzled me, but perhaps there was some kind of refraction from the atmosphere. The oceans formed 90% of the surface and gave no hints as to whether life might be forming there. I would carefully check once I finished surface observations.


    I placed myself within a sterile space pod that was large enough to hold me and all of my various measuring instruments. The pod would allow me to easily float close to the planet¡¯s surface. I glided out of the runabout, ready to make notes and gather samples.


    I was so oblivious, manipulating all of my handheld computers and sensors and surveying instruments, that at first I didn¡¯t make sense of the shimmer I was seeing. What was there? I squinted a bit.


    The shimmery rocks were actually clear plants, swaying slightly in a breeze! The most visible part of the plants were thin silvery veins contained within stems and leaves. My gloved fingers were easily visible behind the plants.


    There was a variety of small clear plants growing among the gray boulders. Not a single plant had color. They were somewhat similar to traditional plant species in form, looking like mosses, tiny ferns, and violets, but they were all completely clear except for the silvery veins.


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    I could hardly believe what I was seeing. The plants were happily growing in an anaerobic atmosphere with poisonous traces of ammonia, ozone and other chemicals. How could these plants be alive?


    I gathered my thoughts and got on with my scientific work. I puzzled over how any vegetation could survive, as I assembled samples of plants, atmosphere and soils. I worked quickly because I wanted to get out of the poisonous atmosphere before it started dissolving my safety pod.


    I submerged my pod into the gray ocean next. The ocean floor sloped gently with good visibility. There were aquatic, seemingly impossible plants here too. Small clear algaes and seagrasses grew in the shallows, and seaweeds grew in the deeper ocean. I quickly took my samples, then ascended back to my sky runabout.


    A quick look into my microscope showed that none of the plants contained chlorophyll. I checked my databases and could not find similar species of clear plants. Could the original plants and even the planet itself have broken off from a larger planet in some uncharted universe? That was something I wouldn¡¯t be able to determine with my few instruments here in the runabout.


    However, I knew some gnomes and a fairy who would be quite interested in the mystery. I invited my plant specialist wife Jaal and my two scientist daughters Liveta and Rinja to see the amazing plant life on Little Gray Rock. I didn¡¯t need to invite the fairy. Phyler, her fairy senses sharpened by her ongoing security work, detected that something was going on and arrived too, just to make sure we were safe.


    They were all suitably impressed with the barely visible beginnings of life on this strange world. I could already tell that Liveta would be angling to be part of the team set up to analyze its unique plants.


    However, that¡¯s only partly why I invited them. I wanted to set up a simulation of how the plants would continue to evolve naturally on Little Gray Rock if the planet was not destroyed. I knew they would enjoy this time travel project.


    Wrapped within sterile travel pods, we instantly transported to the little planet a million years in the future. Seeing the changes was so interesting.


    The gray rocks were worn down quite a bit, so now the planet had pebbles on flat areas and even sand on the beaches. The plants were still completely clear, but they were much larger and more advanced now. I especially enjoyed the tiger lilies growing in rock crevices, with their leaves and blooms reaching out to the sun. The lily forms were so perfectly shaped that it was like the entire planet was set up as a stage just to show off the subtle, graceful forms.


    We saw only small and primitive animal life on the planet¡¯s surface. There were colonies of some kind of clear bacteria and some small, silvery earthworms. Apparently, it¡¯s extremely difficult for complex life to evolve with no oxygen in the atmosphere. It will be a fascinating area for Liveta to study.


    As we moved into the oceans, we saw life there, too. Brine shrimp, jellyfish and tiny nematodes were surviving in the salty waters. We were all quite emotional at seeing the new life all around us.


    Clearly, our conference of creator gods and other interested parties will vote to push the rogue planet off course and save this amazing little world. I marvel at the unique life on it, and I also realize that if the planet had been much smaller our group would not have bothered checking it at all. It almost makes me ill to know that the amazing life forms on Little Gray Rock could have been destroyed without us ever knowing they were there. That is something to think about for the future.


    Phyler had been darting around Little Gray Rock in her own travel pod and absolutely fell in love with the planet. After all, why wouldn¡¯t she? Fairies are silvery and nearly invisible as they move, and are also mysterious and ethereal. I don¡¯t think Phyler has ever seen a planet that matches fairy personalities so well.


    Phyler has been making plans for her flutter of fairies to take over guardianship of the planet. They will keep a watch on it and make sure no beings alter its development. I am sure they will change the name Little Gray Rock to something more graceful and elegant in their fairy language.

 Chapter 42: Cities in the sky

    What do I think of cities? An interesting question for a gnome, since gnomes were specifically designed to live within nature. I have never lived closer to a city than in its greenest and least populated suburbs. To force a gnome to live within a paved city would be quite cruel.


    Even though I live contentedly within a nature sanctuary, I do spend time studying cities. After all, it¡¯s necessary to understand this part of humanoid life in order to design a satisfying wild area for them. And to be honest, I enjoy a change from nature now and then, especially during long, cold winters. After a holiday surrounded by gnomes and other humanoids, I am delighted to return to the company of my sweet and shy animal friends.


    I do admit that cities are fun and exciting and quite enjoyable. I love feeling the life force and creativity of humanoids concentrated into areas of high energy and creativity. As the dreamers and doers on each world find out, there are so many contrasting ideas and needs in urban design. It¡¯s very hard to balance old and new, young and old, traditional structures vs. towers of steel and glass. Every city has a different energy.


    And when I¡¯m in a city, I vividly realize why time spent in nature is so valued by the city dweller. Living close together takes a lot of patience. Spending time in nature lowers stress levels and lets residents remember who they are: natural beings who need time to tend to the outdoor-loving, unrestricted side of themselves.


    Now a new type of city has become popular: a city in the clouds. Yes, a city that defies gravity and exists in the air, floating above a planet. It is called a cloud city or a sky city.


    I suppose it was inevitable that cities constantly growing upward have finally moved into the clouds. These new floating cities are made possible by a combination of magnetic forces and antigravity technology.


    Floating cities are designed to have residents live on the highest floors. These levels are wonderfully scenic and tranquil oases. Living so high above the ground makes residents feel like they are angels or even light beings. Such an elevated lifestyle is a profound experience.


    Ordinary business and social activities occur on the more crowded middle floors. Support services are placed discreetly on the lowest levels. Farming activities are accomplished through advanced hydroponics, which could be in the clouds or in an on-planet greenhouse zone.


    There is in fact a compelling reason to move planetary residents and their activities into a city elevated above a planet: It allows the planet below to return to its unspoiled natural state. It is the best solution to the dilemma of needing to house multitudes of people in limited space. After all, planets with clean, breathable air are not so plentiful that we can destroy them through carelessness. Planetary preservation efforts have become the highest priority in most universes.


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    Cloud cities didn¡¯t come into their own until new technologies allowed the traditionally polluting industries around them to become clean manufacturing systems. A small part of the planet still has to be reserved for production of necessary items, but all of these industries are much cleaner. No more toxic leatherworking chemicals, no more poisonous plastic compounds, no more animal butchering wastes, no more metal smelting leavings. No dirt or pollution, just high-tech services to support the enjoyment of living in the sky.


    As the cloud cities grow and expand, each one becomes more unique.


    Some of the cities look old-fashioned, for a feeling of charm and familiarity. Medieval-inspired entertainment parks draw huge amounts of tourists. There are daring thrill rides and even extremely popular dragon coasters. Entire sky cities and even parts of the planets are designed as family vacation complexes.


    Some cloud cities are designed to appear as ultra-modern, gleaming towers. High tech corporations often have their headquarters in business-like facilities such as these. The top floors are designed to be city parks, so workers can easily take relaxing walks on sunny pathways weaving among trees and flowers.


    A few of the cities are very spiritual. They specialize in spa weekends and relaxing getaways. Participants gather in meditation circles at the very highest tops of the tallest towers. Serenity is broken only by the resonances of breezes moving through sound tubes, and the charming high-pitched vibrations of crystal bells. I tend to dislike random noises, but even I find these healing tones to be well-done and subtle enough to help pull my mind into deep meditation.


    Cities in the sky tend to run vertically as well as horizontally. They have openings to allow sunshine to stream through and not block too much light from the planetary surface. The push and pull of many construction shapes give the cities dramatic skylines.


    Designers have worked very hard to make actually living in cloud cities not just dramatic, but also a friendly and welcoming experience.


    A priority for planners is to avoid the ¡°alone in a crowd¡± feeling that large cities can create. Distinct neighborhoods, open spaces with seating available to stop and chat, and convenient light rail systems set the scene for enjoyable humanoid interactions. In all of the cloud cities I¡¯ve visited, chatting with fellow travelers and residents has made the trip special.


    An efficient sky city usually is only part of a well-run planet. Natural areas below are growing as they were meant to, with native plants needing minimal care. There are no zoos, just open areas where animals can live naturally. Humans enjoy the wide-open spaces and close interactions with large animals. Trips to the planet¡¯s surface tend to be multi-day safari vacations.


    Most cloud city entertainment areas contain the usual swimming pools, bars, gambling pits and glamorous shows, but that doesn¡¯t really interest me. I tend to skip right past these light amusements to the interesting activities. You know, looking at architecture, figuring out construction methods, evaluating landscape choices, enjoying well-planned spaces, trying restaurants, meeting gnomes and other beings, and viewing the plants and wildlife on the planet¡¯s surface.


    I enjoy the contrast with my humble everyday life when I¡¯m in a cloud city. While there, I¡¯ve met other gnomes that hate winter as much as I do, and we¡¯ve become friends. Jaal and I have vacationed with them on a few other cloud cities. There is nothing else like it.