《Herald of Undeath》 A Rather Grim Beggining ''Where did it all go wrong?'' A common question really, but one with deep meanings and sometimes even deeper answers. In my case though, there''s nothing deep about it, I believe it''s just tragic. The ever so sad story of Kael Morgrave, that''s me by the way! Floating in a almost numbing darkness that almost makes me forget this goddamn pain. The pain coming from every fiber of my muscles, all my nerves and blood vessels literally detaching from my bones. The scraping sensation of my flesh peeling from my skull, and yet the weird part is that somehow i still feel my bones? ''Where did it all go wrong?'' My answer to that? From the very fucking start! Blackfern''s Hollow, a godsforsaken village in the middle of nowhere. The closest thing to that could be called civilization is a small barony a week away. Swamps and bogs surround the place, a eerie atmosphere always makes itself known throughout the settlement. Ever got those kinds of depressing days, where you could swear somebody had died or at least suffered immeasurable sorrow? Well depict that every day of the week, for every month and every year, and there you have it! The only reason this cursed place still exists, is that in a cruel twist of fate, some herbs around this place conduct mana really well. Mana; the ever present energy that makes the world go round, a really bendy energy if I could say so myself. It exists in it''s basic pure form and then spreads itself in tinier particles called elemental spheres, which mages and the likes then use to cast spells and whatnot. I''m not really a scholar so I can''t explain that well unfortunately for me, as it had always been a sort of dream of mine to go around shouting fireball and blasting things apart. Sigh... Enough self-wallowing! Moreso, this bloody hellhole was founded by an old hag, one that goes by Lyra Blackfern, some sage that wondered the continents and decided to settle here. Still can''t wrap my head around how demented one has to be to wake up and say: "Hey look at this awful place, perfect spot for a village!" But hey! Who am I to judge? I''m just a decaying corpse at this point, not really prone to judgements i guess... She also decided to raise a small but elite school for the magically talented, in account for the magical herbs. Six or seven teachers make sure to properly guide the students in thepath of the arcane, it is not a world renowed facility for sure, but nothing to scoff at. And in this cozy place, is where I was born and proceeded, against my will, to call home. I was born around midyear, not really sure, around these parts we don''t keep track of such business, but in my case things went on a more sour note. Apparently my unlucky ass was born under a green moon, or as the locals call it The Death Moon, a bad omen if there ever was one. A sickly frail child, a cursed bad omen... What could go wrong? It seems that everything! But you ask, surely things couldn''t be even more somber? Yes they bloody can! I am, or was I don''t know, the only child to the Margrave family, a family of gravekeepers!If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. How perfect... How fitting... So when i grew from a sickly baby to a sickly child, i was avoided like the plague, mostly. There had to be some sunshine in this fog i call life, and those sunshines came as two children. Roy and Lissana, two brave souls that dared to come nearit. Roy approached because he wanted to prove something or he was hazed to do it, he never really told me, and we got along swimmingly. The brat just started hazing me outta nowhere, so naturaly as two young and refined lads, we got into a scuffle! Punches, kicks and hair-pulling, everything was game. We even got a nice little audience at the time from what i remember, we went at it for some good 10 minutes untill a girl got in between us and decided enough was enough. In comes Lissana, a angel on earth, world doesn''t deserve her I always said. A smile warmer than the first rays of spring after the long winter, with the personality to match it. She pulled both of our ears and proceeded to deliver a sermon for what seemed like an ethernity. After that things went as they usually go, we became close friends and shared some wholesome momments together. Until tragedy decided to rear it''s ugly head again... Mom and Dad snuffed it and I became an orphan. As at the time of their passing, I didn''t have the age to keep up family the family trade, they sent some other poor bloke to take the shovel. I was taken in by Roy''s family, which i had gotten close to at the time, thus I became a butcher assistant. No complaints here though beats living in a graveyard. More years pass and Roy, Lissana and me got into that weird fase that hairs started popping up where they shouldn''t and our attributes start to grow. Due to our closeness we got caught up in a dreadfull love triangle, things got all sorts of weird until awinner would be decided. And guess what? It was not me! But no hard feelings! Really none at all! believe me I''m trustworthy! Yeah I am sore loser! So What?! See the woman you had feelings for get touchy with someone else, every single day, and to top it off i lived with the guy! But I couldn''t just break things off with the two, they were the ONLY two people who seemed to put up with me, that closed a lot of avenues so i just decided to suck it up and smile. And now comes the good part, the start of my fall from disgrace. A common day like all others where i looked at the depressing scenery on the window and started my routines. Put on some clothes, wash my face, eat with the guy screwing Lissana... All the good stuff! I put on my worn off boots, grabbed my cutlass and went around the village looking for anyone that wanted for their chicken or their geese to be butchered. Soon enough i found a family wanting their eldest rooster to be turned into nicely cut meat. I went in to get my hands dirty, grabbed the loud thing by the neck and snapping it. It made a clearpop sound that i really enjoy somehow. I defeathered it and cut it''s belly open, digging my fingers through the warm innards, pulling each part out with care and throwing it in buckets stained with so much blood it would make you dizzy. Strange thing though, I always find this part to be comforting... Weird i know! But i can''t help it! Always found that weird, me and death, we have a thing going on. I feel at peace amidst death, when people died I often found myself wondering what the big deal was, they just died, that''s it nothing complicated about it. It only got weirder, as even when my parents passed i couldn''t bring myself to mourn, cry or even feel sad, after all, they just died. Made one hell of a show though, I knew not feeling sad was a big nono, so i put up an act. I fineshed filleting the rooster in nice and neat chunks of meat, delivering it to the nice folk, who seemed fidgety by my mere presence. Sheesh... It''s not like I''m going to bite you guys! I roamed around doing this same dance, again and again till twilight. I cleaned my hands and started walking, going to a place filled with sweet memories, I was going to a small hill near the border of the swamps. The place Lissana and Roy would be waiting for me. Masochistic of me? Maybe, but they''re my friends... That small hill is where we spent most of our childhood in our usual shenanigans. There I saw, the bittersweet scene of the two of them holding hands and gazing in the distance where the moon was about to shine. "Hey lovebirds got space for another?" Lissana looked over and said in between smiles: "Always Kael, you know that! Anyways, how was your work?" "Bloody." She looked at me with a deadpan face until Roy just burst out lauging. "Hahaha" Wiping a non existent tear off his face he countinued. "Still the same after all these years, and you still got a bad sense of humor." "Well atleast i got some sense if any at all." That little response got me a punch in the shoulders. Amidst our usual banter, i felt something wrong, something foul. The hairs in the back of my neck stood up, sweat drenched every inch of my body and my eyes turned bloodshot. A pale sickly green, shined all over us, and in a move that i would forever curse through the remainder of my existance, i looked up. Directly at the fucking moon! And the momment i did so... What i saw would forever be etched deep in my soul if there is anything left of it. Death, carnage, mountains upon mountains of bodies and atop of it that cursed moon! My body turned feeverish, I started trembling, my eyes rolled upwards and I passed out. A Nightmare That Haunts I The screams, the stench of decay, faces sunken in, rivers of bile and blood, gore schelching beneath my feet. Up in the skies a cursed green moon shines an eerie light, i look down, to the vile scene of this unholy puddle, but what gazes back isn''t me, it''s a white skeleton draped in dark robes. The thing appears to be gazing at me, and oddly enough, i think he is smiling, if a bare skull can smile that is. I stare back for what feels like hours of unending tension, I feel uncofortable istaring at this... thing¡ªif it can even call that. The skeleton tilts its head, streaches it''s hand to the bloody surface in slow paced movements. To my surprise, the bony hand erupts out and grabs my ankle tightly, so tightly it hurts. Soon enough his other hand holds my remaining ankle, his ''smlle'' grows and he yanks me downward. I start sinking into the blood sea, I flail around violently, desperately trying to get out of it''s grasp, and I fail miserably as I only start sinking faster. By the time the blood seeps into my mouth, my heart is pounding so violently that the veins in my ears pop like little embers in a fireplace. Slowly but surely I feel like I''m drowning in this gory mess. Despair sinks in... I try to scream as loudly as I can, but nothing comes out. The skeleton appear again in front of me, reaching his hand towards my chest. Pain bursts ou as his claw-like fingers sink into my thorax, wrapping around my heart tightly, he squeezes it, once, twice... until everything goes black. I wake up screaming at the top of my lungs, my throat raw, my body utterly drenched in cold sweat. But even as I gasp for air... I swear I can still feel his grip on my heart. Looking around the room in a daze I notice someone staring at me, a woman I''m rather familiar with, my friend Lisanna. She looks at me in a funny way, she then sighs and comes near with a wet towel in hand. "You gave us quite a scare." She says in a soft tone while wiping my forehead with the towel. It''s a sweet feeling being taken care of by her... Away! Vile thoughts! You lost that one already... "How long was I out for? And what the hell happened?" "You were like that for a day, as for the rest... that''s actually something we hoped you would answer, you just went out cold out of nowhere." We? Who''s we? She''s looking at me in a funny way... There is something off happening here. Then I notice her eyes trembling a bit, I blink and it''s gone. I''m just paranoid... I guess that dream really got to me huh? "I don''t know what happened, I started feeling uneasy, I look upwards at the moon and that''s it." "I see... well you should rest a bit more." "Bah! I can rest when I''m dead." I get up slowly from the bead, wary that I don''t make too sudden of a move, as despite my bravado I still feel a bit weak. I put on my boots, grab my trusty chicken slaughterer and look at Lisanna. "Shall we?"The author''s content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. "I guess if you feel fine, then it''s your choice to make." When I was about to leave the houuse she stopped me. She grabbed me by the shoulders and shot me a nasty glare. "Surely you''re not trying to say that you are going to go out to work without eating for an entire day, are you?" I smiled nervously. Sweat once more dripping from my back. "Well i guess I''m not really that hungry... Lot''s of chicken to butcher and all that you know? My work is important, can''t have the good folk getting their dinner delayed for good ol'' me!" "I know your work is important, that''s why Roy is taking care of it, now stop stalling and sit." I try to get out as fast as I can, but her hands clasp tighter on my shoulders and i swear I can see a vein pop on her forehead. She pulls me forcefully and sits me down in front of the tabble, then she turns around and goes to the pot. I hear a ploping sound behind me and my stomach twists and turns weridly. "Quick question though... who cooked?" "Naturally I did. You know Roy can''t cook, unleass you call that slop food." "Haha yeah you''re right..." She puts the bowl in front of me and sticks a spoon on it, sitting besides me and staring at me intently. I smile weirdly and start eating the food, the momment it touches my tongue all i can feel is the taste of ashes, my brows furrow quickly and I''m left staring at the bowl in confusion. I was always quite fond of Lisanna''s food, maybe i was biased yes but... even with the simplicity of it, her food was something to look forward to. This isn''t what I remember, know that I think about it, I can''t smell it... What the hell? I can''t smell it... Why can''t I smell it? My hands trembled slightly, my eyes shaking a bit, unease sinking into my heart. What''s going on... What''s going on... What''s going on... I feel a warm pair of soft hands over my trembling one. I look up in a haze and I see my friend''s tender gaze. "I know it might be a bit bitter then what you''re used to, the village elder said to put a bit of medicine on it." She smiled apologetically. "Yeah bitter... Not really used to it, but it''s alright, thank you for doing all of this." My eyes avert from hers, the guilt from lying to her sinking in, but more than that the strangeness of it all. I spent a whole day lying down, yet I''m not hungry, I''m eating a food that I''ve always been fond of, yet all I can taste is ash, there is a whole fucking pot of food in the house, yet I can''t smell anything. What is happening to me? I grit my teeth and eat the rest of the food, swallowing it quickly, trying to keep it away from my tongue as much as I can. At the corner of my eyes Lisanna eases up at me wolfing down the food, her shoulders seeming like a giant weight has been lifted from them, after I finish eating Lisanna hands me a cup of clean water. I take it and start to drink, in the hopes of washing down the ashen taste, instead of the predicted refreshing feeling of the cool water washing down my gullet, it actually flows down burning my tongue and my throat, I tear up but still force myself to drink the bloody thing, despite the pain. Handing back the cup to her i get up and go out of the house while thanking her for care. I walk in quick strides, desperately trying to find some desolate corner, every second feels like torture, every step makes the food and water in my oesophagus churn, deepening my agony. When I do find somewhere safe, I retch violently, vomiting everything along with a sticky black bile. Finally I feel ''normal'' again. What is this? I cover up the unholy mess with dirt and decide to work and keep it away from my mind. I walk around the village trying to find Roy and relieve him of ''my'' work so that I can do it myself. While doing it I notice the gazes of the rest of the villagers are more distant than the usual one. Odd. Soon enough i find the hulking mass of muscles that i call a friend walking around with his hands stained in blood, for a split second I can almost see that blood as my own, a quick and fleeting nonsensical thought but my world crumbles down with it... "Hey Kael! How are you feeling? Doing better now? You were tossing and turning in your sleep." "Ah... I''m alright thank you. But can I handle the rest of the work? I feel uneasy with having nothing to do." "Sure thing buddy, I should check up on Lis, she didn''t catch a wink this whole time. I should make sure she gets some rest." Yeah right... you''re going to help her rest alright. My world turns red, like that sea of blood, for a second and I can see the bony hand from my dreams, streching out and squashing Roy''s head like a rottten apple, a sense of satisfaction washes over me... "Hey Kael!" I blink and it is all gone, the red world, the bone hand and Roy''s dead body. My mind turns when i remember how I felt when watching it all, I curse myself for feeling that way, scurrying to respond to Roy. "Yeah I was just lost for a second there... Wasn''t ready for the sickening lovey-dovey aura around you that''s all." "Haha, well then see you later." He walks past me and disappears in the distance. The hell just happened? A Nightmare That Haunts II Seeing my friend walking away, the guilty feeling of lying to Lisanna and that ''vision'' of Roy, haunts me once more. Sigh... I try regaining my composure by grasping my cleaver tightly, breathing in and out slowly. But the faster my heart beats, the harder it is to push down the feeling that something is terribly wrong. Finally my fast beating heart starts to slow down a bit. I look around for a bit before I go to work, if there is any left. As I roam around, memories of everything that happened ever since that nightmare begin playing in my head, again and again, slowly I''m getting dizzy from this fucking cesspit of a day. I''m woken up from my reverie as a burly man, with too little hair on his head and too much on his body, beckoned me over. "Hey butcher boy! Get your ass over here!" Real polite I see... "Coming over sir!" I walk over to him, as I do, the red world comes back, with a much too similar gory vision as the one with Roy, it ends just as fast though. My heart starts beating fast again, i turn a little bit weak in the knees and almost stumble over. "I need my cow butchered boy! I was keeping her for the milk, but she stopped giving any, so now she''s going to be the dinner, hahaha!" His grating voice sounded over my ears as I furrowed my brows. I wasn''t trained to butcher a cow, as I have always been quite weak, so it wouldn''t end well for both me and the cow. My body was always scrawny, my black hair dry like hay and my eyes sunken and darkened like I''m always suffering from insomnia. "Sir, I''m not really capable for butchering a cow." "What do you mean you''re not capable of butchering a cow? Aren''t you a fucking bu-..." During his rant he turned to look at me, the moment his eyes fell on me, his face sunk. His visible annoyance became a almost too blatant discomfort. He straightened up his back and cleared his throat. "I see it''s you then... You''ve woken up." He almost sounded like he really wished I didn''t. I''m sure this fucker wouldn''t be like this straight to my face right? "Indeed I have. So if you want your cow butchered you have to go to Roy''s father." "I''ll do that tomorrow then. I''ll make due today with old goose over there." He pointed to an old grey goose with a funny walk. I approached the little thing and nonchalantly picked it up. It''s honking drowning out my tumultuous thoughts and bringing me a tiny amount of respite from it all. "Sorry little guy, but this is it for you." I clasp my hands around its long neck, suddenly applying a little bit of force to my hold. The neck pops with the all too familiar sound, but this time, instead of that strange comforting feeling I sought, an all too sweet smell assaults my nose, the first one ever since I woke up at that. I look at the goose weirdly for a good couple of minutes. The man behind me gets impatient and urges me on. "Get on with it, or are you going to make a fucking ceremony for the thing?"Love what you''re reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on. I am jolted of my reverie as I defeather the goose. My thoughts once more dance around wildly. What the hell is this smell? As I finish defeathering it, I grab my cutlass and cut open it''s belly. The sweet smell gets stronger and stronger as its guts pour out. My hands automatically dig themselves into its innards as though they''re treasures just for me, moving around with glee. My very souls feels ecstatic with all of this. I pull its entrails with care, as if they are the most precious thing in the world, a strange feeling of warmth spreads around my chest as I do. I stop myself from playing around with them, and throw them in the bucket, as I have weirded out, both myself and the man behind me too much for a single day. My hands move with a never seen before expertise, I cut the meat masterfully and somewhat beautifully for me. I hand back the meat to the not very polite man, as I receive the payment for the service. I do the same thing a few more times, a few more clients, a few more creatures dying by my hand and the same experience with the goose happens again and again. As the bucket gets fuller with their viscera, the feeling to just dig around and caress them gets stronger and stronger, I feel my will faultering ever so slightly. Before I lose myself to this feeling I run trhough the village and toss the guts to the dogs that roam around guarding the sheep from whatever lurks in the swamps. I get back home before night fully settles in, the darkness and the moon somehow now make me feel strange... I greet Roy''s dad on my way in, then the same for his old mom, both of them don''t give two flying fucks about me though, it was already bad enough before, but it only got worse now. Seems everyone in this hellhole knows about my fainting trick. Fuck them all! They''re going to die anyway KeKeKe!!! ... What did I just think?! I freeze at these thoughts, they aren''t mine. That wasn''t me! It fucking wasn''t me! I plop down on my head as I''m starting to get too dizzy. I close my eyes trying to rest and just push myself to sleep, hoping all of this is just a bad joke of a nightmare. But sleep doesn''t come. My eyes are closed, my heart stopped beating so fast, it almost isn''t beating at all actually, my mind is almost completly empty, so why can''t I sleep? I feel time pass around me at a frightening speed, I hear Roy and his parents speaking in too fast a pace for me to catch anything. I feel the fucking moon and the darkness slither around the sky, but no sleep at all. As I sink deep into this state I feel the warmth of the sun beggining to rise in the sky, part of me feels frustrated of its intrusion upon the darkness. I push that part of me away as I ''wake up'' slowly, earlier than everybody else, even the roosters haven''t started singing yet. When I start my usual routine of putting on my clothes, washing my face and all that good stuff, i notice my pale skin, well paler than usual at least. I feel uneasy. I rush over to the water bowl to look at myself. My skin is indeed much, much paler than before, i can see purple veins all over, my eyes have sunken further, my skin is dry as sand and my hair fell off a bit. I''m starting to look better eh? I''m starting to what now? What in the flying pigs is happening to me? I hear the people stir behind me as I get on with what I had to do. I cook some plain and fast food, food that I know i cannot eat, as such I cannot share a meal. I pick a bowl lying around, I smear a bit of the food on it, just enough so that it appears used and dirty. I came up with this during my ''sleeping'' state, i can''t let them know what''s going on with me. They can''t know... They can never know... They will know though KeKeKe!!! ... I breath in slowly, I clasp my hands tightly, looking up with a newfound resolve. I put on my clothes, making sure they cover up my visible purple veins, as for the rest I''ll say I''m just under the weather or something, not much else I can do. I go out as the sun starts to shine on the horizon just like I felt it would, the receding darkness leaves me behind unwillingly. My heart mourning it''s loss, my mind feeling frustrated about it, well part of it at least, a part that I''m really starting to hate honestly. As the light hits my eyes I find myself momentarily blinded. My eyes are much too sensitive to bright lights now. I''m losing something at every second... Something important to me, something crucial to me. What am I turning into? What did that fucking moon do to me? Whatever I''m becoming, it''s dark, it''s not good. I don''t really know how to feel about it... I don''t even know if I''m actually turning into ''something'' rather than I''m just becoming more like myself. That thought frightens me, it makes me wonder, just what aberration did the Morgrave family give birth to? Do I let myself loose? Do I try to maintain what I am now? Can I even fight or stop this change? Can I trust someone? Anyone? You can''t do anything. You never could. KeKeKeKeKeKe. A Colder Me Is Awakening The sun rises higher in the sky, the roosters start singing, and one by one, the villagers start to wake up. The sunlight hits my paler skin, yet I do not feel its warmth. Instead, a faint discomfort creeps in, and I end up flinching a little. As I stare absentmindedly to the sky, a figure approaches me, and catches me off-guard, much to my dismay. Lissana pokes my sides, and starts giggling by herself. I''ve never understood her need to do that, it irks me how she insists on doing these things to me, she treats me with this awkward affection and closeness, one would show to their partner or... to a child. And since I''m quite brutally reminded every day I''m clearly not the former, that only leaves the latter. I can''t quite know if it''s just her quirks or if it''s something else, something that pisses me the fuck off, because more than once has she done this in front of Roy, and sometimes i swear I can see knowing smirks from the both of them. Whenever that happens, I feel something dark wash over me, something I''ve been getting quite familiar with this past day. That familiar bitter feeling crawls over my mind, I feel something clawing at my heart begging to be unleashed, to be inflicted... Lissana flinches for a second and looks around in a worried daze, I tilt my head in curiosity, that unusual reaction amuses me. I kind of want to see more of it, but before I can revel on this new feeling she asks in a somber tone. "Did you feel that?!" "Feel what?" I stare at her with a playfull gaze. "N-Nothing, I think it was just a cold breeze... A-Anyways, has Roy woken up?" She uncomfortably shifts the matter. "He hasn''t, should be up shortly though, if you want you can go inside and wait for him. You''re no stranger after all..." "No need for that, I don''t want to be a bother. Are you going to work now?" "Yes I am! You know I feel restless without something to do." "Can I accompany you then? I also want to make sure you''re okay, you look paler than usual, if you weren''t talking to me I would think you are a corpse." My eyes narrow briefly at that comment, it unsettles me. I want to get rid of this nuisance... "You want to watch me butchering poultry? Isn''t that a bit too bloody for you?" "Nonsense, I''m going to be the wife of the future butcher of the village, can''t go fainting at these kind of things." Ah yes, there is that... "I suppose there''s no problem then..." I give a hollow reassuring smile, while on the insides I''m feeling quite the annoyance, annoyance mixed with something else... We walk together through the village seeking for clients like I usually do, only this time I got quite the nosy company. The first client pops up soon enough, a plump red haired woman approaches us. She greets Lissana warmly and looks at me with visible disdain. "What can I help you with?" I ask with a cold tone, colder than I have ever used with someone. Both Lissana and the woman look at me with an unbelieveng look in their eyes. "That fat chicken over there..." She speaks in a mild tone with a more ''agreeable'' look in her face. I nod and go over to the chicken, as soon as I approach it, the little things starts trembling and shaking violently, like it has seen the most dreadfull of beigns. I look curiosly at it, as I strech my hands towards the chicken, it freezes up and I catch it quite easily. ''How unusual...'' I whisper to myself.This novel is published on a different platform. Support the original author by finding the official source. I delicately run my finger up its neck, I apply the usual strenght, it''s just that my fingers end up digging through the neck of the bird, instead of a pop I hear a squelch. Odd... I didn''t put that much force in my grip, neither do I remember being capable of this. I put these thoughts aside as I enjoy that sweet smell once more. I''m starting to enjoy this, not gonna lie... Once I have defeathered the creature like usual, I start gutting it, as I do, I start noticing the intricacies of the dead chicken, how its muscles stick to the bone, how the tendons stretch and snap when I pull on them and how even after its death the chicken''s heart pulses ever so slightly. How peculiar! How wonderful! This goes on and on, again and again. As I repeat the process multiple times, the visceral feeling of just wanting to caress the innards of the poultry, is overwhelmed by a morbid curiosity of their functions and how they work together. I want to know everything... Nay... I need to know everything. During the day I start to linger a bit too long over the innards, tilting them, pressing them, feeling their weight. I almost want to do this while they are alive, see how they would be different. While I''m doing this to yet another goose, I trace my fingers on its veins, feeling their slight pulsing, marveling a the fact that moments ago they were thrumming with life. I start to wonder, just how different a cow would look like... How different would a human be... Lissana has been watching me closely all this while, I wonder what does she actually hopes to achieve with this. Lissana trembles for a bit, her eyes flicking nervously. "What are you doing Kael? Why are you playing with a goose''s intestines?" I look at her tilting my head a bit. "I''m curious, that''s all." "About what?" She asks with a soft but uneasy voice. "About why you''re with me." My tone sharpens without thinking. I relish in the discomfort that seems to settle over her. "I said I want to get used to this. For Roy." "That''s a lie though..." Her eyes widen, and I see a brief flicker of panic in them. She stammers, trying to find her words. "W-What do you mean?" I notice the tremble in her eyes intensify from the one from yesterday, betraying the unease she''s trying to hide. I take a slow breath, savoring the moment. "If you trully wanted that, you would''ve gonne to Roy." My gaze lingers on her, cold and unmoving. "But he would have been doing this to cows, sheep and goats." As I hear that excuse, a wicked grin slithers over my face. I let out a low chuckle, a dark and almost predatory sound. "Guts are guts, blood is blood, it matters not whether from poultry or cattle, they''re just bigger my dear Lissana..." My grin goes wider, something sharper creeping into it, something new, yet familiar. She looks at me while trembling, her shoulder shivering, yet they are not shivering from the cold. "Fine! If you don''t want me here I will leave." Her words are rushed, laced with a mix of hurt and fear. She looks at me one last time, but her eyes show the want for something else... a different response perhaps, one she shall not receive, not anymore. "That would be for the best." I can''t even feel the weight of my words anymore, and by the looks of it, neither can she. As I say that I see an unbelieving expression grow on her face, it then turns into something else, something I can''t quite read. She stares at me with wide eyes, she trembles a bit more, turns around and leaves. As she walks away, one thought crosses my addled mind, ''how fun...'', it is indeed a new feeling. The client of the goose, who was watching this in a front row seat keeps staring at me, until I grow Impatient. "The fuck you''re looking at? You lost something?" He gulps loudly and points with shivering fingers at the bird still in my hands. My eyes narrow and I force an appeasing smile. "Ah yes this... I suppose I should finish my work, yes?" He nods weakly. I expertly cut the bird and hand him the chunks of meat. I finish my work for the day and head home, lost in my tumultuous thoughts. Things are changing at too fast a pace for my liking, but they''re also being infuriatingly slow. As I near Roy''s house, I notice him, and his parents at his side, standing in front of the door. Their expressions are not good ones. I approach them without the slightest worry, as I do so, Roy starts to rant in that insufferable voice of his. ''How the fuck did I endure this for all those years?'' As I wonder in disbelief over my own poor tastes, Roy speaks to me in that self-righteous tone he believes is intimidating. "Lissana told me what happened... what''s wrong with you?" He looks at me with an admonishing gaze. I look at him stupefied, in utter disbelief he would actually want to confront me over this. "What? Should I entertain her while you''re unavailable? I don''t remember having signed up for that... it''s not my job to do that, it hasn''t been ever since you know when." Word for word my voice grows darker, I''m getting more and more detached from it all. His face contorts in shock. "That''s not what I-" Before he can make any dumb excuse, i shove him aside as I speak once more. "Not interested. So fuck off. I''m tired." I brush past his parents, who seem too stuned to do or say anything, as I make my way inside. I can''t actually sleep anymore. But dealing with these people does make me wish I still could. Let''s see what tomorrow shall bring. The Flesh We Shed, The Masks We Drop Another sleepless night, filled with thoughts and conjectures of my own. I keep replaying the last day, my actions, my mannerisms, everything about me is changing at a fast pace. Yet part of me believes it is not a fast enough one. Still, the way I acted with both Lissana and Roy were completely out of hand, unwarrented even. Can''t help but wonder though... was I right? Lissana wanting to follow me out of nowhere didn''t make any sense. I get the unsettling thought that she actually came looking for me, and not with any good intentions. Weird things have been happening since that bloody green moon. The villagers disosition towards me took a turn for the worse and I always feel like I''m being watched. Am I getting a tad bit too paranoid perhaps? Are these changes happening to me, making me stress and fuss over little things? I don''t know... And that infuriates me. Sigh... Nothing I can do for now though. My inner thoughts are interrupted as I feel the uncomfortable presence of the sun nearly rising in the horizon. My eyes open slowly, my breathing quickens a bit and my slow beating heart pulses with a little more intensity. And then, I smell it. Rot. Raw, putrid, thick enough to coat my throat. My brow furrows. Weird... I haven''t been able to smell anything recently. Except for... ''that one thing''. The only scent that still reaches me. I sit up, my movements stiff, searching for the source. But as I do so, the stench follows. No... it clings. Realization hits me like a battering ram. It''s coming from me... I look downwards to my pale chest, only to notice dark green spots with yellow edges, my veins which were a purplish color before have turned a dark gray as more of them have become aparent. My eyes widen, as the faintest hint of utter despair threatens to burst out. I reach my fingertip to one of the spots on my frail and thin biceps, only for my nail to end up sinking into it. My skin tearing itself apart with ease and the putrid smell become slightly stronger. Beneath the ripped skin, I see a muscle, with a mixture of pale grey and sickly green colors, the distinctive signs of rotten meat. The despair escapes my control and washes over me. I start hyperventilating. Jumbled up emotions, thoughts that I feel aren''t completely mine, inability to eat, drink or sleep, a paler body and whatever happens when I kill and poke around a body... those are utterly nonsensical thigs. But those I can deal with. My own body rotting? That''s a bit too fucking much for me. My hands tremble uncontrollably, my eyes shiver wildly, but my heart is still beating slowly, too fucking slowly, I can''t even sweat now. I''m dying... Or are you already dead? KeKeKeKe... As I hear those cold unfeeling words and that manic laughter, my world shatters itself apart. It loses its colors, and is instead overcome by an unyielding gray. My eyes turn dull, as I''m left standing in the dark with thoughts even I can''t fully comprehend. I look at the ''wound'' again, my fingers once more dig into it, pulling it apart. It can''t have spread too much further right? It can''t! But as I foolishly cling to this hope, my flesh unravels, showing that the extent of the decay, goes way beyond just the visible spots. The flesh feels unnervingly soft, like fresh mud, its dampness spreads over my fingers. How''s this possible? It has only been a day!Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on the original website. Roy shifts in his bed, not too far away from mine. He is waking up, maybe the smell is bothering him? I can''t let anyone see this, so I get up quickly. I pick a bandage to hide my wound, and stop the pus that is now leaking from it. I wrap my biceps with it, turn after turn, too absorbed in my own world to realize I''m walking and where I''m walking even. The village''s houses blend into one another, I walk past them in a reverie. As I finish dressing my wound I find myself sitting against the wall of one of the houses. When did I stop walking, how did I fucking sit without noticing? Bah! Weirder things have been happening anyway... As I''m about to become imersed in my own thoughts, I hear an old raspy voice. That voice belongs to the village elder. So this is where I am huh. Then I hear a sweet melodious voice. That of Lissana. I don''t quite listen to what they are saying since I''m quite busy with my own thoughts. That is until I listen... my own name being said by her, and my ears perk up. "... yeah he is indeed behaving strangely." Her sweet voice trails off with uncertainty. "How strangely girl?" The old man''s voice raises with impatience. "I don''t know! He is feeling colder, he seems sick and he... seems fascinated with animals innards." "I always knew that accursed child would end up bringing trouble to us. Look at his dead parents..." Hearing that my fists clench tightly, my eyes go a bit bloodshot. I dare you old man, say one more fucking word... "... I bet he was the one that killed them. He cursed them! Just as he will do with the rest of us." Yeah I''m going to kill you shrivelled sack of meat! My thoughts turn tumultuous, as I cling to a final ray of hope, maybe Lissana will put some sense in this fool. She was never one for superstitions after all. "Well I don''t know about that..." Yeah tell him! I should apologize to her latter, what I did was definetly uncalled for. But never in my wieldest nightmares, would I have been prepared for what followed. "Ever since you asked me to watch him, he has indeed behaving strangely, but I don''t think he has a droplet of magic on him. He always sulked about that." As I hear her merciless words, my heart drops, the world seems to be getting colorless again. So I was right huh? She wasn''t hanging around with me to be a better wife for Roy, or wathever other bulshit I had cooking up my mind... She was just fucking spying on me. At that old geezer''s words at that. Just a little pawn for him to pull the strings. My eyes lose that glimmer of life, they clung to so desperately. They turn empty, as empty as this dark abyss my mind is sinking into. I swear, I can almost feel whatever it is that''s causing me to rot, getting more ravenous, as if i just poked the fucking thing. HaHaHaHaHa... I start laughing like a maniac, my tone ever so slightly becoming more like the skeleton from my dreams. I can''t stop laughing, not that I would want to anyway. The absurdness of it all is so fucking funny. KaKaKaKaKa... In the corner of my vision I see figures moving. But I couldn''t care less, I just continue laughing, louder and more bizarrely. "Kael... what are you doing here?" Hearing the bitch''s voice makes my laughter slowly die down. I look up in annoyance, noticing the elder is here, along some other villagers who heard the commotion. "I was having such a blast. You just had to ruin it for me didn''t you Lissana? Like you ruin everything else." My voice sounds colder than ever before... "What are you talking about?" She asks as her brows are furrowing. "Is this about yesterday? If so you''re better be here to apologize to me!" "Apologize?" My voice gradually shifts to that of a rutheless tone. "For what? For calling you out on your bullshit? For being smarter than you give me credit for?" "What?" This time the one to speak is the elder, his face completely deadpan as his eyes scurry through my entire body. "Buzz off you old geezer, I''m talking to your little puppet here." I say as I slowly get up from the ground, dusting off my clothes. It is at this point that the two of them narrow their eyes. The rest of the crowd looking with newfound curiosity and intensity. "Tell me little puppet... Did you even bloody object? Huh? Or were you overjoyed at the opportunity to make good old Kael for a fool?" I say rather menacingly as my gaze shifts over to her. "What are you on about Kael?" "Ah, I should comend you, really! You should be an actress in one of the big cities, you''re waisting your potencial in this hellhole." I delect myself in her confusion, her growing unease, a pity I can''t just bottle those up... "Let me ask you this. Are you just his little spy, or are you his little plaything as well? Actually can he even get it up?" I ask with a playfull but curious gaze. Her face twists itself in anger, she takes a step back, looking at the elder, seeking his help. "That''s enough Kael! You ungratefull brat." My gaze shifts once more, losing it''s playfullness, only to be replaced by ice cold fury. I walk over to him in slow steps, the old man doesn''t even move an inch. "This is the second time you have interrupted my conversation with your puppet. There will not be a third." Once I finish those words, my hand darts towards his neck at a surprising speed. I raise the old man high in the air, his old flesh unable to escape my grasp. I slowly apply more strenght to my grasp. Strenght that I previously did not possess. The old man''s throat is so thin. So frail. My fingers tighten, and his heartbeat stutters. A strangled gurgle escapes his lips, it''s intoxicating. I give one last squeeze. The body goes limp under my grasp. A bag of brittle bones and useless flesh. The last breath leaves his lips in a pathetic rasp. That''s it. That''s all it took. I let him go and he hits the ground lifeless. My smile turns into a demonic grin. A Complete Downfall Looking at the old man''s corpse at my feet, I just couldn''t help but grin. My grin was so wide that my rotten lips riped oppen, oozing a blackened blood over my face. My gaze wandered from the corpse back to the fair skined little puppet. Her eyes wide open in terror and surprise. A perfect expression... fear, surprise, and just a touch of despair. Beautiful. Glancing at the rest of the audience, I saw similar expressions on them, though none as delectable as Lissana''s. I watched as they grew in panic. Maybe they were wondering... When would it be their turn perhaps? Honestly this is reeaaally fun. Like messing around with little ants. Right? KeKeKeKe. Am I really that far gone? That I can no longer view people as more than that? Did my mind fall so much, that I find myself agreeing with these words in my head? And why is it, that the tone in them is growing more similar to my own? I sigh loudly, catching the attention of everyone from the elder''s corpse. Once they see my face, oozing black blood, with a manic and demonic smile, their desperation grows to unreachable levels. Some of them even faint on the spot, some whisper ''monster'' under their breath, while most just stay absolutely frozen stiff. My gaze focuses on Lissana again, noticing her every details, details that I couldn''t quite catch before. Her snow-pale skin, brown smooth hair, and deep green eyes... All of those pale before her real self, her pale skin flaking around her shoulders, her fingertips bruised and partially ripped, and her visible veins carving an alluring map on her body. A unique fleshy work of art. She recoils, her body trembling under the weight of my gaze, as if my eyes could peel the flesh from her bones. I took a step towards her, a step filled with a monstruous stride. As I did so, Lissana tried to get back, but ended up tripping, and falling on her back. I chuckled lightly. Crouching in front of her, I extended my hands towards her face. The air was stale with everyone''s silence and heavy breathing. My hand approached her leisurely. "Please leave me alone... Please..." She sniffled weakly. That weak pathetic noise hit me like a rock. It made me pause. It made me flich. What am I doing? How could I do this? I looked at Lissana... I mean, I trully looked at Lissana. I saw her body trembling, tears in the corner of her eyes, recoiling from my mere presence. This image overlaped with the one from my memories. A cheerful girl that could warm my heart, make me forget my deepest sorrows, and this terrified woman. My slow heart thrummed furiously and with a powerfull intensity. Like it was trying to deny something, trying to take something back. But it was too much for its current deteriorated state. It ripped itself appart, spilling black blood all over my insides. The vibrations from that pulse resonated inside of me, tearing my inner organs, from my lungs all the way to my intestines. I ended up retching pieces of everything, along with black blood. I felt pain like never before, as if my hole being was torn apart, not merely physically, but my own spirit as well. The liquid hit the hem of my friend''s dress. She looked at me in horror. As I matched her gaze, I looked at her with pleading eyes. No... It wasn''t a pleading gaze, it was a begging one. I wanted to beg for her forgiveness, for everything, for the fear I had caused, for the way I let my mind twist beyond reason. Even if she was spying on me, I had no right to complain, just that she was willing to befriend me... It was enough for a lifetime of gratitude. Yet... Yet... I acted as the elder said. Like an ungratefull brat. I took the years of friendship for granted, and assumed things without even asking her. I''m really the worse. My insides didn''t need to rot, they were rotten all along.A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation. I mustered whatever little air I could with my shredded lungs. "L-Liss-a-na... f-for-gi-ve... me... p-plea-se..." My voice flowed in a low rumble, almost inaudible, the sounds so far apart that they could barely be considered words. Her eyes flared open. Her face twisting in an expression I couldn''t read. There were very few emotions I could notice in it. Fear. Sadness. And confusion. My vision was darkening by the second. The world spun, and my body hit the filthy ground, making a dull thud. I heard steps around me, voices flaring up, a discussion ongoing. My decayed tympanum only catching snippets of it. "...Monster..." "...Burn..." "...Kill..." "...Purge..." "...Curse..." "...Toss..." "...Swamp..." It continued for a while. Up to the point I felt myself being lifted, the small, consistent bumps of someone walking, and a familiar presence. And then, without ceremony, I was dumped into a small wooden cart. One used for hauling animal food... or their filth. My mind flashed in and out of a state of consciousness. I heard angry ravenous screams, and muffled sobs. All of it inside my own mind, as two very different mindsets battled each other. Though I couldn''t tell who or what had the upper hand. The journey was a really rough one. More than once did the cart get stuck, splashing slimy water over me. I guess the one carrying me isn''t all to happy. Fucker must be enjoying this. Not that it is undeserved. Sigh... I made a mess out of things, didn''t I? After a while the cart stopped in a dry patch of land. The person hauling the cart turned me over, till I could finally see them. Roy... A familiar face, with an unfamiliar expression. When he noticed my gaze he smiled a bit. "You really fucked up didn''t you Kael?" His smile turned into a grin. "I-I... Guess I d-did..." I tried to speak, as bile and bits of flesh, spilled amidst my words. "Haha! You really did man..." His voice trailed off as he gazed at the distance. "But I must say, you made my work easier. Guess I should at least be gratefull for that." I looked at him with curiosity. Noticing my gaze, he continued to speak. "Well I never really told you, my side of things, of the day we met. Did I?" "As you should know... It was a little dare, ''Go and fuck over the village freak!'', kid stuff you know how it goes." Yeah I always thought as much, it made no sens for him to approach me out of nowhere. "But you... you little fucker. You didn''t play the part. You started fighting. Do you have any idea how pissed off I was?" Hah... sweet memories. "It was seriously annoying... till Lis got in the middle of us." She never liked those kind of things. She always found them ''too brutish''. "Then she went into a little rant. I say little, but I bet it went for at least an hour, if not more." Hahaha. I thought she was going to talk our ears off... "You know? I like this silent you a lot better. You''re more agreable this way." Fuck off you prick! "Anyways..." He spoke. Interrupting my insulting thoughts about him. "During her rant, I noticed the way she looked at you. And I saw a chance..." Huh? "... a chance to get with the pretiest girl in the village." What the fuck is Roy talking about? "I just had to tag along you, and she would stick around the both of us." I''m reeaally not liking this Roy! "Fast forwards a few years, and the two of us got closer and closer. Though the way she looked at you was different... It pissed me the fuck off. But I guess she saw in you a stray puppy or whatever..." Eh? "... thankfully you were always a dumb fuck, and you didn''t notice. Because of that I could approach her, and I got to bed her." You motherfucker! No rubbing salt on the wound! But really? She looked different at me? Nah he''s jesting around. "I even got to have fun parading her in front of you." Yeah... I kind of catched those smirks on you... "Though the day you fainted, she started looking at you in that way again. She got all skitish and worried about you. She begged the elder for medicine, though he denied spending anything on you..." Glad I killed the old geezer. "... so she spent all her savings on a potion made by those wizards from the school." SHE DID WHAT? WHY DID SHE DO THAT? "She spent all night caring for you... Even kicked me and my parents away. I had to fucking watch her sit beside you with that worried look on her face." As his words came, I couldn''t help but remeber everything I had done since I woke up. My emotions went into turmoil, my flesh darkned quicker, and I felt my muscles detach themselves from the bone. "Watching that infuriating scene, from the outside of my own fucking window... You have any idea how I felt? I bet you don''t." Fuck off that I don''t, I had to watch you being clingy with her you bitch! "So that night I decided I was going to get rid of you." W-What?! "Problem is... I think she noticed that. So she went to hang around you." Wait... "She offered herself to keep an eye on you, for any signs of changes. The elder, ever so supersticious and wary of you, took the excuse, hook and all." No... "But you... Hahaha! You dumb fuck... You pushed her away." He laughed a vile, unsettling laugh. "I don''t really know what is wrong with you, but I don''t really care. You are going to stay here, like a good dog, and you''re going to be devoured by beasts." I could barely register his words by now. "Bye bye! I have a woman to comfort now. Thanks for you patronage... Imbecile." And just like that, I was left alone. To muse over my own thoughts and mistakes.