《Born to Die》


 1 - The Unspun Thread

    A woman sat, spinning her spinning wheel, monitoring the silvery thread that came out of the wheel¡¯s end. It was laborious work, spinning the fibers of fate into thread that had order, that followed the wheel of time. The thread snagged, and then snapped, and the woman stopped her spinning.


    It wasn¡¯t often that something went wrong when she was spinning fate. As long as everything followed the natural order, the spinning of the wheel of time never stopped, not until she was out of fiber to spin, until the person whose fate she was spinning had reached the natural end of their lifespan.


    Sometimes the fate was wrong, or something was miscalculated. The woman considered taking the thread that had been spun and putting it aside, ending this particular fate. She knew her sisters did it often. They were not responsible for errors in the wheel of time, of humans playing with fate. Their job was only to spin, and once the thread was done, make it part of the tapestry of history.


    The woman looked down at the thread spun so far. It was different from most human threads. They were all beautiful, some in jewel tones, some the sage greens of forests, some the blues of veins, but then there were those that were above the rest. The thread in her hand was a dull gold. Gold was a rare color to see among threads, and it was rarer still because of how it was dulled. The woman remembered such gold, from her time living as a human. Old gold was darkened by time and wear, but still just as precious, and to her, just as beautiful. Put through the fire, the gold would grow bright again. Perhaps the thread would be the same.


    She withdrew the thread from the spindle and the bobbin, and carefully untwisted most of what she had spun so far. With the mess of golden fiber in her hand, the spinning woman began again, rewriting a life that had been cut off midway. She would fix the mistake, and no one would be the wiser.


    <hr>


    Sia sat in the dark, cold, dungeon. It appeared that everyone had forgotten that she existed. She didn¡¯t know how many days it had been since she had seen another face. The hunger gnawed at her insides, and if she could satiate her thirst with her own blood, she would have. Blood, she had realized through an ill-begotten experiment, was salty. And salt only made one thirstier in the long run.


    She was at death¡¯s door, and she wished the door would open soon. She heard the sound of heels against the stone steps, and someone appeared in front of the cell. Sia wished she could muster some of the etiquette she had been taught throughout her life. Since she was a child, she had lived standing with her back straight, her hands folded together across her waist, like the perfect doll her parents had taught her to be. Now, she could not even sit up. She saw the woman¡¯s heels, and she knew who it was.This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    Her older sister Laureline. Sia had lived in her older sister¡¯s shadow her whole life. Laurel was prettier, smarter, and she was beloved. Sia had never known what it meant to be so beloved. She knew how to love, but she had never received love. At least, not in the manner Laurel had. She was tolerated. Her family fed her, clothed her, and educated her. But their love had been solely for the two older children of the family, Fenix and Laureline.


    ¡°Hello, Ardisia,¡± Laureline said. ¡°I did not expect you to still be alive. It¡¯s always the weeds that just refuse to die, isn¡¯t it?¡±


    ¡°Lau¨C¡±


    Her voice refused to work. Her throat was too dry, and she hoped her sister could understand. She only wanted a sip of water. That, or a quick death.


    ¡°In a way it is good,¡± Laurel said. Sia wished she could see her sister¡¯s face. Laurel sounded happy, and that was such an unnatural emotion in this dark and miserable place. Sia remembered her sister¡¯s smile. Laurel was easy to smile, easy to laughter. In comparison, Sia had been a gloomy creature. Then, Laurel had been given reasons to smile, reasons to laugh. She had people willing to spend their days in pursuit of Laurel¡¯s happiness.


    She had not been abused as a child, nor mistreated. She simply was not anyone¡¯s concern. Her parents had ignored her existence, her brother thought her useless, and Laurel let her follow her since Sia¡¯s presence only brought to light how much better Laurel was.


    ¡°The royal family wants to make a spectacle of the witch,¡± Laurel said. ¡°They want to burn the witch at the stake, to stomp out any ideas of bringing magic back to Opria.¡±


    Sia was not a witch. If she had been, she would have magicked herself out of the dungeon. She would have left behind all the people who had disappointed her, who had let her go through pain and suffering and only watched. Everyone called her a witch. All of the proof pointed towards her. Sia was innocent, but all of her protests had done nothing.


    ¡°Sister¨C¡±


    ¡°Ardisia, give up,¡± Laurel said. ¡°Your fate has been sealed. You will die at the stake, and end your pitiful life. I will marry the prince, for our family will be rewarded for our loyalty. There are not many who would willingly hand over their own daughter to be punished, and so easily. You are only meeting your natural end, Ardisia. This is the thing you were meant for.¡±

 2.1 - The Mortal Hell

    Sia¡¯s feet were being shoved into shoes too small. She remembered the feeling. It was a frequent one during her childhood. Her toes would become red from the friction against the cheap, tough leather. Sia opened her eyes as she felt her feet finally slip into the shoes completely. The laces were tied, so tight she lost a bit of feeling in her feet.


    She remembered the shoes she was wearing, little heeled boots with flowers embroidered on the sides of the leather. Laureline always wore ornate shoes. She¡¯d started wearing heels when she was only eight years old, and Sia was expected to follow in her sister¡¯s stumbling, unsteady footsteps.


    Like most of the things Sia owned, her shoes were also Laurel¡¯s castoffs and the things she had outgrown. The shoes were custom-made for Laurel, on top of being too small, and they were torture to walk in, especially as a child.


    She hadn¡¯t seen the pair she was wearing in years. She looked up as the door closed. She was in her bedroom again, but it seemed larger than before. No, it was the opposite. Sia was smaller. She was closer to the ground, and was wearing the gowns she¡¯d worn as a child. Her chest was flat, her limbs short, and nothing made sense.


    Sia had never wished for a mirror in her room when she was a child, but she wished she¡¯d had one at the moment. But mirrors were expensive, and the family wouldn¡¯t waste something with so much silver on her.


    She stepped out of the room and went down to the garden. In the early mornings, after waking her up at dawn and putting her in whatever dress was clean, the maids then proceeded to go to Laureline¡¯s room. Laureline was pretty enough to take time on. Her long hair needed hours of brushing and careful arrangement into ornate styles. Her outfits had to be coordinated and accessorized perfectly. In the past, Sia had sometimes looked in through the half-open door during the mornings, wondering at how beautiful her sister was. Now, she rushed past Laureline¡¯s rooms and down to the garden. It was the sole place where she could see herself without being chastised for vanity, or mocked for wanting to see a reflection that everyone else in her family had found disappointing.


    The reflection she saw of herself in the water of the garden¡¯s pond was never accurate. She did not know the exact lines of her face, but it had been an approximation she could work with. Now, the approximation was that of herself, but as a child. She could not be older than ten years, meaning she was fifteen years in the past. The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.


    Her childhood had not been a good time for her. Sia realized she had never really had good times, only times that were not terrible and times that were. As a child, she had been left alone in the estate more often than not. Her brother and sister¡¯s development was carefully monitored. If they were prize rosebushes that their parents carefully watered and pruned each day, Sia was the wildflower that had accidentally grown between the cracks in the garden path. Sia smiled at her reflection. Calling herself a wildflower was a kindness. In truth, she had been treated like a weed.


    It was a dream, or one final delusion from her starved, dehydrated mind. One final gift before death. Perhaps if she was lucky, this was death. She would have expected the afterlife to offer her something more, but no one had ever given her what she expected or desired. The afterlife, it seemed, was no different. If she could just spend the rest of eternity repeating days of her childhood, where at least she had the freedom to roam their estate without worry, she would be happy with what she was given.


    At least it was an age where her food had not been restricted. The moment she had started to bleed, her mother had started to notice her. At first the attention had been welcome, as her mother bought her a new wardrobe of clothing and beauticians to see what could be done with her youngest daughter. The beauticians had instead flocked towards Laureline. There was no fame to be gained from transforming an average girl into something a bit more pleasing to look at.


    But if they could work on Laureline, shine a light on her already luminescent beauty, they could grasp some fraction of the admiration that she would earn from society. So they had left Sia¡¯s room and congregated in Laurel¡¯s chambers, had added even more to her already stunning appearance. Her mother had lost hope then, and Sia was only left with her criticisms. A girl without a pretty face and without charm could not afford to be fat, was her mother¡¯s reasoning.


    So her meals became rationed, she was denied sweets, and she was subjected to random checks. Sia knew there were peasants who had truly starved. She was given enough food, she knew. It didn¡¯t help her forget the nights she had gone to bed hungry, because she had failed one of her mother¡¯s checks.


    She was glad she would live for eternity as a child. A child¡¯s life was so much simpler than an adult¡¯s. It was somehow a world with other people, or her delusions of them. She slowly walked back into the manor, trying to be silent. At least the afterlife could have been generous with her, given her shoes that fit. She had to cross Laureline¡¯s rooms to get to her own small chamber, and by habit, Sia held her breath as she walked by the door. Surely, neither delusion nor death would be so detailed as to create a replica for her sister.


    ¡°Sia!¡± her sister yelled, and Sia flinched.


    If Laureline had followed her to eternity, Sia wondered if she could die again after death, and try to escape to some other place. She heard Laurel before she saw her, and Sia stopped mid-step. Perhaps she was being stupid, thinking she would be so lucky to get into some kind of neutral afterlife. She was in hell.

 2.2 - The Mortal Hell

    Laurel was a lovely child in front of her. If Sia did not know her sister so well, perhaps she would have loved Laurel just as much as everyone else did. After all, people were drawn to beauty. They were drawn to golden hair and emerald eyes and a face that was the personification of a summer day.


    ¡°Sia, what are you doing here?¡± Laurel asked. Her question from the outside sounded innocent, but Sia knew the real meaning behind it. Sia was meant to stay in her room when they were expecting guests. Normally, they were not so strict, but on the days when they expected guests Sia was restricted to her room. Society thought that the Kaldors¡¯ third child was sickly, often restricted to her bed with some flu or the other.


    It wasn¡¯t entirely false. Sia was often ill as a child. She was small for her age, and the very picture of infection no matter how much rouge her mother had applied to her face once she got older. Now though, it must have been one of those occasional days where she was untouched by illness.


    ¡°Good morning, Laurel,¡± Sia said. She hoped her false smile was convincing. She had loved Laurel in the past, although that love had been tinged by jealousy, and the jealousy had been covered in guilt. She saw why others loved Laurel, and as a child, she had felt like a villain for even thinking slightly badly about her perfect sister.


    ¡°We have guests on their way,¡± Laurel said. ¡°Mother told you this already. Go back to your room.¡±


    As a child she had never questioned why she¡¯d had to hide away even when she was feeling well.


    ¡°Who is coming?¡± she asked.


    ¡°It is none of your business,¡± Laurel said. Her sister had a talent for saying terrible things in a good-natured way. ¡°You should go back and rest.¡±


    Sia knew what would happen if she refused. She was small enough to carried away kicking and screaming. She had outgrown the tantrums of children years before. So she smiled away and turned away. Her one signal of rebellion was not offering her sister a proper greeting.


    Her room surrounded her, and it felt so empty. It was small, but made larger by the absence of proper furniture and decoration. The visits to Laurel¡¯s quarters had been infrequent when she was a child, but it had always felt like a special treat to be let in. With curious eyes she had taken in everything in Laurel¡¯s rooms. Every time she visited there was something new and beautiful to see. The curtains were replaced each season, the walls painted new every year, the bed and beddings upgraded each time some more luxurious or soft fabric was found.


    Sia¡¯s own room was an afterthought. The expensive furnishings were used for long enough and then given to servants who wanted them. There were no paintings on her walls, and the color had faded over time from a cornflower blue to something darker and sadder. Where the paint was chipping, she could see the plaster underneath.A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    She had been so generous in her memories, forgetting the barrenness of her childhood. Her parents had kept her fed as a child, and she had a roof over her head, but she had been deprived of so many things. She had been denied proper education with the excuse that she did not have the intellect for it, exposure to the world because of her sickness. She had been denied friends. Laurel held her tea parties in the garden, and Sia had yearned to join in. She had looked in from her bedroom window. At first when she was too young, a kindly maid had told her that it was because she was too young. But even when they were both adults, Laurel was the only one with friends, while Sia was at best, her handmaiden.


    Because of her illness, had they always considered her a wasted investment?


    She recalled what Laurel told her, before her death. Laurel had told her that Sia was only meeting her natural end, that her purpose had been to die.


    Only Sia hadn¡¯t even done that properly. She was somehow back in her old home. It had been hours since she¡¯d collapsed in the cell, Laurel growing blurry as her eyes closed. No delusion could last so long. And did dead people dream? She didn¡¯t know. She had never been a religious person in her first life.


    She decided to sleep instead, finding a little warmth beneath her threadbare blankets. When she woke, her lunch was on a tray next to her bed. It had grown cold, but she ate readily. Her body wasn¡¯t all that hungry, but her mind was. The last meal she remembered was moldy bread, the last drink water that had tasted of mud.


    Sia threw her head back after the first sip of her soup. Even leftovers and cold food tasted good when they were made by the Kaldor chefs. Hell or earth or whatever place she was in, at least they had the decency to feed her.


    Once she was done with her meal, she went to her window. The window overlooked the garden, and if it was Laurel¡¯s friends who had come to visit, they almost always had tea in the gazebo.


    People were in the garden, but they weren¡¯t Laurel or her friends. Her father rarely made the effort of coming out to host guests. Her mother sometimes did, but her father usually stayed to his offices, focusing more on his work and making friends with the neighboring nobility or landlords.


    But her father now was obsequious and all pleasing laughter. It was a strange appearance on him, Sia thought. He only reserved stern grimaces for her. Her siblings got soft, wide contented smiles of pride. Now, whoever the guests were, he wanted to impress them. He wanted their favor.


    Perhaps the father she had in the afterlife was different. Among the guests, there was a little boy, around Sia¡¯s age.


    She remembered.


    Perhaps this was the day that things had truly started going wrong. The Kaldors were neither the highly ranked nobility, nor were they extremely wealthy. They were well off and they were well respected, but they were one among a few dozen other noble families with a similar pedigree and wealth. Furthermore, their lands were in the north, where farming was difficult and winters were unforgiving. Their wealth did not come so easy.


    But the royal family had visited, and the queen had taken a liking to Laureline. Sia had slept that day, and heard gossip from the maids about how the queen had loved the little miss.


    She had cried that she had missed the royal family, that she had been in her room. Now, she opened the window a little to hear what she could of the conversation. This time at least, she could learn first-hand what happened during the visit.

 3.1 - The Family Flaw

    Hedith Kaldor was a woman who was proud of herself. It was not an undue pride. She was a landlord¡¯s daughter, who had risen to nobility. Landlords were only lords in name. Their domain was only over dirt. As Lady Kaldor, she had power, she had influence, and she was a lady over other human beings. Her husband had wide swathes of land with tenant farmers who took off their hats and bowed their heads if she was so much as in the vicinity. When her name was announced as she entered gatherings, she could hold her head high and look down on those less fortunate.


    It had all been possible because she was beautiful. Hedith knew that was why her husband had thrown away sense and married a woman with little dowry and no name. Beauty blinded even the most intelligent of men. She worked hard to maintain her beauty, because even the position of lady of the house was an unstable one.


    She paid attention to her appearance, to the clothes she wore. She made sure if she was one of the most beautiful women in any room she stepped into.


    Now, it looked like her daughter would go even higher. Laureline was lovely in a way that exceeded even Hedith¡¯s expectations. She hadn¡¯t had to suffer the effects of a childhood under the sun, of chores that roughened her hands, or of a family that didn¡¯t understand the true value of a woman¡¯s beauty. She had the benefits of proper education, of knowing how to speak and what to say, and how to give flowery praise while seeming absolutely sincere. It was coming in so useful now. A few decades before, Hedith could never have imagined that her daughter would be walking holding onto the queen¡¯s hand, that a royal family would compliment her on having a lovely home.


    She could have more. Fenix would be a lord, but Laureline could be a princess. If Hedith was lucky, she would see her daughter as a queen. As for Ardisia¡­ Hedith looked up at the manor, where her youngest daughter was in her room. Ardisia would benefit from her sibling¡¯s good fortune for a time.


    Two out of three was not terrible, Hedith convinced herself. It was enough to cement her place in society. She had produced an heir, and a beautiful girl that would bring her father a good name. As for Ardisia and her illness, that was something the girl had inherited from the Kaldor family, not Hedith.


    ¡°You have such lovely roses,¡± the queen commented, and Hedith smiled. It was a genuine smile. Her roses were the pride of her garden, the envy of her neighbors. She¡¯d had the plants imported from Revordell, and her husband had balked at the expense. Now, the roses had paid for themselves.


    ¡°Thank you, your majesty,¡± Hedith said. ¡°Laureline loves roses and chose this variety.¡±


    The queen took her hand out of Laureline¡¯s grasp and placed it around her shoulders instead.The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.


    ¡°It appears your daughter has good taste at such a young age.¡±


    Hedith beamed and offered the queen another curtsy. Praise filled her stomach more than food, and each word from the queen¡¯s mouth confirmed her belief that she had done the right thing by focusing her attention all onto Laureline. The fact that the roses were actually Ardisia¡¯s favorites did not matter. The queen could never meet Ardisia, never doubt that perhaps the Kaldor blood had flaws or hereditary disease. Hedith knew she could not hide it forever, but it would be enough if she could hide it until they had gained more favor.


    Her husband¡¯s wealth was moving the nation forward, as the railroad industry gained momentum, she knew they would become wealthier still. It was true that Wright was only a baronet, but that could change with time. Now, she knew that while she was a Lady, her husband¡¯s title did not even have enough power to give her a title of their own. Duke¡¯s wives were duchesses, counts has countesses, but baronets were so low in the hierarchy that her husband¡¯s title was sometimes seen only as a courtesy. Sir Wright Kaldor had leveraged his wealth to buy himself a place in high society, but he had not gotten a good bargain.


    ¡°I was told that you had three children?¡± the queen asked. ¡°Is the youngest not here?¡±


    ¡°My youngest¡ª,¡± Hedith searched for a plausible excuse. She would lie and say that Ardisia was with Hedith¡¯s parents. It was true that her father and mother doted on Ardisia in a way they did not with Laureline and Fenix. For some reason, they found something lovable within the child that Hedith had yet to see. Before she could open her mouth, she heard a sound from the manor. It came from above them, and Hedith pleaded to the gods for it to just be a bird.


    Instead, they all saw the tiny head darting back inside the window. Ardisia¡¯s illness came on suddenly and unexpectedly, and she¡¯d told the maids to restrict her to her room for the day. They¡¯d told her that she was sick with a fever just the day before.


    ¡°My youngest,¡± Hedith continued, gathering her wits. ¡°Is quite the wild child. You know how the youngest children are.¡±


    She meant to come off joking, and she hoped she succeeded.


    ¡°Then invite her down,¡± the queen said. ¡°She looked close to my son¡¯s age.¡±


    Hedith hesitated and then called for one of the maids. As long as Ardisia stayed healthy and behaved herself, there would be no issues. The queen would still be taken with Laureline. Hedith glanced at Laureline, and saw the beginnings of a scowl beginning to form on her face. No matter how much Laureline was prettier and more liked, Ardisia¡¯s appearance meant that she would have to share the attention she was getting.


    Her older daughter was good at many things, but sharing was not one of them. Hedith cleared her throat and gave Laureline a look. Within a second, Laurel¡¯s face was back to her usual good-natured smile.


    ¡°Would you like to see our hedge maze, your majesty?¡± Laureline asked, leading the queen away from the manor and towards the maze. To others, it only looked like a child showing an adult what she thought was interesting. Hedith knew better. Ardisia was still young, and she was scared of the maze. She had gotten lost in it once, and never stepped foot in it afterward.


    Hedith followed them in. She had racked her mind on how to keep up the image she had created, of the flawless family with the perfect daughter. Laureline had done it with ease. Ardisia would stand at the edge of the maze until they returned, and by then, it would be almost time for the royal family to leave.

 3.2 - The Family Flaw

    Ardisia looked healthier than she had the day before. She was still small for her age, and far more plain than Hedith or Laureline had been at that age, but she looked better. The stranger thing was that she was at the center of the maze. She had always been scared of getting lost, and after her bad experience, she had barely stepped out into the garden. In the end, it appeared she had chosen the worst time to overcome her fear.


    The queen looked in interest at the little girl who was more a miniature of Wright than Hedith. Where Laureline was golden, Ardisia was sable. But at least now, there was a nice rosy hue to her cheeks. She looked healthy, and Hedith only hoped that her good health and humor would last until the royal family departed.


    Ardisia executed a perfect curtsy and greeted the queen. The maid beside her was holding a handmade bouquet of roses, and Ardisia handed them to the queen.


    ¡°I heard you say you liked the flowers, your majesty,¡± she said, looking down.


    The girl in front of her could not be her daughter. Ardisia was not charming or sweet. She could not yet curtsy properly, didn¡¯t have the intelligence or awareness to come up with the idea of gifting the queen flowers. Laureline possessed that kind of charm. Ardisia was dark and dour and constantly ill. She was like a walking reminder of childhood mortality, and Hedith could not reconcile the daughter she knew with the hopeful waif in front of her.


    The queen took the offered bouquet with a smile. Hedith didn¡¯t have to look at Laureline to know she was scowling. Now, the attention was not shared. The queen¡¯s gaze was solely on Hedith¡¯s younger daughter.


    ¡°Thank you, child,¡± the queen said. ¡°What is your name?¡±


    ¡°Ardisia, ma¡¯am,¡± Ardisia said. ¡°You can call me Sia if you¡¯d like, though.¡±


    ¡°Ardisia!¡± Hedith scolded her. The girl had made a mistake, just as she feared. Her majesty wasn¡¯t a simple ¡®ma¡¯am¡¯, and to address her as such was an insult. ¡°I apologize, your majesty. She is young, and does not properly know etiquette yet. I will make sure that she is taught better in the future, to address you properly.¡±


    The queen laughed. ¡°No, Lady Kaldor. She has been taught well. It is perfectly allowed to call royals in the manner that your daughter did, after the initial greeting.¡±


    Hedith had not known. Her own etiquette teacher hadn¡¯t known. No one expected the Kaldors to ever grow wealthy enough to entertain royalty, and her lessons had anticipated that she would meet a duke or duchess if she was lucky. Somehow, her daughter had known. Now, it was not Ardisia who was the fool in front of the queen, it was Hedith and Laureline.


    For the day, Ardisia looked better, and Hedith saw the queen¡¯s thoughts in her eyes. The younger a child was, the easier they were to mold. Ardisia looked healthy for the moment, and the queen would think of her as the intelligent younger daughter. She might not possess Laureline¡¯s beauty, but Hedith realized for the first time that the queen was not beautiful either. She was an elegant woman, and carried herself with dignity, but her demeanor distracted from her plain face.If you come across this story on Amazon, it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it.


    Such a woman would think it better to choose a sensible girl as a partner for her son rather than a pretty one. Compared to Ardisia¡¯s quiet consideration and gift, Laureline might appear loud, brash, a bit too precocious. The queen stepped forward and took Ardisia¡¯s hand.


    ¡°Why don¡¯t you show me your favorite parts of the garden?¡± she asked.


    Ardisia hesitated. ¡°Would you like to see the rockery, ma¡¯am?¡±


    Hedith imagined she heard Ardisia emphasize the last word, as if to reiterate Hedith¡¯s own stupidity. It had to be her imagination. Ardisia was too young to be so conniving, and from the beginning she had been rather simple-minded. The knowledge was probably something she gained from reading her story books. It could be nothing more.


    ¡°The rockery?¡± the queen asked.


    Hedith and Laureline were left behind as Ardisia took the queen to the rock garden, a remote part of the manor that Hedith herself detested. It was Wright¡¯s favorite place, and no matter how many times she had tried to convince him to get rid of the dismal thing, he had never relented. It was the ugliest part of the manor, in Hedith¡¯s opinion.


    She followed behind the queen and Ardisia, a few steps behind.


    ¡°Why is the rock garden your favorite?¡± the queen asked. ¡°Surely, a pretty young girl like you should like flower bushes and vines more.¡±


    Ardisia paused for a moment, looking around at the curated flowers and hedges they were walking by.


    ¡°The rockery will survive,¡± she said. ¡°The flowers die if there¡¯s too much sun, or not enough. They die if the gardeners don¡¯t take care to use the proper fertilizer, or if they get too much water. They take too much work. The rockery doesn¡¯t need anything. The rockery survives even though the gardeners pay it very little attention.¡±


    ¡°You like it for that reason?¡± the queen asked.


    ¡°I¡¯d rather be strong, ma¡¯am. I¡¯d rather be able to take care of myself than depend on others. I think people take care of pretty things, and they grow fragile and dependent on that care.¡±


    The queen looked back at Laureline, and Hedith started to feel a pit forming in her stomach. More and more, she saw her dreams of being related to the royal family slip away. Ardisia was driving the queen away from Laureline. She was painting her beauty as something vapid and powerless, and Hedith could not stop her. Whether the girl was doing it knowingly or not, she was dooming their family to the same namelessness they¡¯d had for generations. Ardisia might have temporarily caught the queen¡¯s attention, but Hedith knew such girls were not memorable. The queen would leave, and she would forget their family. She would find some other young girl, of a higher rank, who lived closer to the capital city, and make her the crown princess.


    ¡°Ardisia, I believe it is time for your lessons,¡± Hedith said. She could still salvage the situation. Laureline was saying nothing, and that frightened her too. Laureline was good at getting her way. She could be pleasing and sweet when she wanted to be, but when things did not go her way, she behaved like a child. She grew petulant and ill-spirited, and Hedith knew a tantrum would soon arrive. The queen had not said a single word to Laureline since Ardisia¡¯s arrival.

 3.3 - The Family Flaw

    Hedith wished that the men and the boys would join them soon. Queen Verista had not let go of Ardisia¡¯s hand yet, and the conversation between them became quieter as they walked closer. She could not catch some of the words, and she saw the queen grow thoughtful at some of what Ardisia said.


    It was different from before, when the queen was smiling at Laureline. Hedith wondered if the queen had only been humoring Laureline, being nice to the pretty young girl that no doubt wanted to impress her. But with Ardisia, it seemed to be a conversation between friends instead of an adult and child.


    ¡°Laureline, why don¡¯t you ask your father to join us in the rockery?¡± she asked. Laureline left, and Hedith let out a breath of relief. For the moment, the tantrum was averted. When Wright joined them, he would put forth Laureline as the daughter the queen should pay attention to. Soon Ardisia would be in her sickbed again, while Laureline would continue to be beautiful and charming. She explained to the queen, ¡°It is my husband¡¯s favorite place as well.¡±


    ¡°I see your younger daughter takes after your husband then,¡± the queen said. It was praise that Hedith did not like. For years she had heard people praise Laureline, telling her that Laureline took after her and was just so lovely. Fenix took her after in appearance as well. There were Kaldor features, of course, but their coloring and the frames of their bodies seemed almost modeled after hers. In contrast, Wright and Ardisia were slighter, thinner. Wright was happy to show off his beautiful wife and children. They praised his good fortune, his luck in finding such a beautiful wife, but they never praised him or his characteristics.


    Now, she was in Wright¡¯s position, and she did not like it. Everyone spoke of Wright¡¯s good fortune, but it felt like an insult being reminded of who had truly been fortunate, whose life had truly changed. It had been Wright¡¯s decision to marry her that elevated her status, that allowed the luxury to maintain her beauty. Without her, he would still be Baronet Kaldor. Without him, she would have been some village housewife, her beauty long gone, weathered away by difficult times and household work.


    ¡°Baronet Kaldor must dote on her,¡± the queen continued. ¡°It is always nice to see our good qualities passed down to our children.¡±


    Wright was a genius when it came to business. It was the reason she was the envy of even countesses and marchionesses of their region. Hedith couldn¡¯t imagine what had convinced the queen that Ardisia had inherited any of that acumen. The queen was wrong though. Wright did not dote on Ardisia. He was a businessman, and Ardisia had always been an asset without potential. If Ardisia had at least been healthy, perhaps he would have doted on her.


    ¡°He thinks it would spoil her,¡± Hedith lied. ¡°Wright is disciplined with all our children.¡±


    The queen nodded. Wright and the king came into view, Laureline¡¯s hand in his. Hedith calmed, seeing her husband. Wright fixed things. It was what he was good at. Behind them both, Fenix and the prince followed.


    ¡°Lord Kaldor,¡± the queen said. ¡°I¡¯ve had the most pleasant chat with your youngest.¡±


    ¡°My youngest?¡± Wright asked, until he caught sight of Ardisia. Wright¡¯s mouth tightened, before falling back into a practiced smile. It was his business smile, the one that could hide a thousand different emotions behind it. She wondered if he was angry with her, with Ardisia, with any of the maids who let their youngest outside of her room.


    ¡°She¡¯s quite insightful for one so young,¡± the queen said. She leaned down to face Ardisia. ¡°If my son were half as wise, I would consider myself very lucky.¡±


    She called over the young prince and put her hands on the young boy¡¯s shoulder. ¡°This is my son, Robalt. I believe he is around your age. I hope you¡¯ll be good friends to each other.¡±


    Wright looked down at Laureline, and Hedith caught his raised eyebrow. It was not the outcome he was expecting, but he wasn¡¯t displeased.


    ¡°You all should come visit us in the summer,¡± the queen said. ¡°I¡¯m sure the children will enjoy seeing everything the capital has to offer.¡±If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    The prince looked back in Fenix. He had wanted to play with Fenix more. In the capital, most people kept their distance from him. He had started to realize that a lot of his victories in combat training, in archery, and in swordsmanship were false. People let him win because they were afraid of outshining him. Fenix didn¡¯t do such a thing. Robalt had lost three times in their five bouts of hand to hand combat. While Fenix¡¯s father looked angry, he couldn¡¯t say anything even though their fighting got more spirited.


    ¡°Fenix, please come and visit! You can come in the winter too, if you want!¡± Robalt offered. He hoped that Fenix¡¯s father would see how much he liked Fenix, that Fenix wouldn¡¯t be chastised for not pretending to lose.


    ¡°I do have some work in the capital in the winter,¡± Lord Kaldor said to the king. ¡°If your majesty would like, my son and his highness can spend some time on my estate near the capital.¡±


    Robalt hoped his father would accept. He had noticed that Lord Kaldor did not monitor his son so closely. Fenix¡¯s knees were covered in scrapes and in general he was louder and more boisterous than Robalt was ever allowed to be. The king nodded his assent and Robalt broke out into a grin.


    He looked towards his mother, hoping she wouldn¡¯t voice any concerns. She often did, and even when he got his father¡¯s approval his mother often pointed out some problem and Robalt ended up not getting his way. His mother was instead looking at a girl he hadn¡¯t seen before. Fenix had only spoken of one sister, and he¡¯d seen her when they first arrived.


    The younger girl looked different from both Fenix and Laureline. She had dark brown hair, and gray eyes. She was small and slight, and when she spoke it was slower and more deliberate than he expected.


    ¡°Good afternoon, your majesty,¡± she said, offering his father a deep curtsy. It was perfect, and when she stood up, she offered Robalt a similar greeting. He bowed in response. His mother continued to speak to her, and Robalt realized the girl hadn¡¯t introduced herself to him. She had gone back to speaking to his mother like she was one of them, an adult, and not a child like him or Fenix.


    She pointed out the different plants in the strange garden they were in, telling the queen the details of where the plants came from. Lord Kaldor looked surprised at his youngest daughter, continuously speaking about deep botany as if it were the most normal thing in the world.


    Hedith focused her attention on the king. Whatever the queen said, the final say would be up to the king.


    ¡°Your majesty¡ª,¡± she said, chiding herself on the mistake she had made again. ¡°Sir, would you like to retire to the music room? Laureline is an exceptional harpist.¡±


    ¡°Yes, I think it would be nice for the boys to get out of the sun for a while as well,¡± the king said. His wife was not being a gracious guest, focusing all of her attention on the child the Kaldors seemed least proud of. Baronet Kaldor had told him that his youngest child was feeling poorly, but the odd little girl looked hale and hearty, albeit a bit small for her age.


    They took more refreshments in the music room while Laureline played her harp. Hedith was glad to see her in better spirits. In the music room, she was the star of the show, the one who held everyone¡¯s attention. Ardisia sat on one of the armchairs, her hands folded across her lap, respectfully listening and clapping when each song finished.


    ¡°Does your youngest not play, Lady Kaldor?¡± Queen Verista asked.


    ¡°I do not, ma¡¯am,¡± Ardisia answered. Hedith hated how she kept taking over the conversation.


    ¡°When you come to the capital in the summer, I will acquaint you with a nice teacher I know,¡± Queen Verista said. ¡°You have a voice that deserves to be taught to sing.¡±


    Hedith realized that the queen was right. She had focused on the pianoforte, the harp, but never thought of singing. Laureline had not liked singing, and so she had never considered it for Ardisia.


    ¡°Thank you, ma¡¯am,¡± Ardisia said. In truth, Queen Verista thought that the girl had a voice that deserved to be heard. She was insightful, and when she was passionate about things she was thorough. Verista had not expected to learn about rock gardens and be interested about them. She had asked the girl about politics, about economy, and while the girl¡¯s responses were simplistic, they demonstrated genuine thought and consideration of more than superficial problems.


    The Kaldors were an interesting family. Their eldest son and heir was a typical young lord, and seemed to get along with Robalt. Their older daughter was treated like a priceless treasure. Meanwhile, their youngest was not even an afterthought. She hadn¡¯t missed the way the girl walked slowly due to her ill-fitting shoes, or the way the clothes she wore hung on her frame. The Kaldors were wealthier than many in the nobility, yet they might as well have dressed their younger daughter in rags.


    ¡°In fact, would you like to become a lady in waiting for my daughter?¡± Queen Verista asked.

 3.4 - The Family Flaw

    Verista was not usually a kind woman, and she normally did not care to meddle in other families¡¯ matters. But it was such a waste, letting the girl waste away with family who did not value her.


    It was true that she was younger than most girls who came to become ladies in waiting, and Verista could guess that the girl¡¯s education had not been a priority or even a concern for the Kaldors. But she was intelligent, she was considerate, and she would be a good influence on Evana. They could be companions or playmates and be educated together.


    ¡°Your majesty,¡± Hedith said. Laureline was on the makeshift stage in the music room, but it was like the center of the room had shifted. Everyone was looking at Ardisia, who looked stunned by the queen¡¯s sudden request. ¡°My daughter is young, and she is often¡ª¡±


    Hedith stopped speaking, feeling Wright¡¯s glare before she saw it. She had been about to say Ardisia was often sick.


    ¡°Of course, your majesty,¡± she said instead. ¡°It would be the greatest honor.¡±


    ¡°Wonderful,¡± the queen said. ¡°I will send a carriage for her once we return to the capital. You need not trouble yourselves with that. She will be the responsibility of the crown.¡±


    After Laureline half-heartedly played a few more songs, it was time for them to leave. They had more nobles to visit in the region before returning to the capital.


    ¡°Sia, don¡¯t worry about anything. You¡¯ll be well taken care of in the capital. Whenever you miss your family, you will be allowed to visit them,¡± Verista assured her. ¡°I know you¡¯ll miss them, but this will be good for you.¡±


    She offered warm goodbyes to the rest of the family and got into the carriage. The king took off his coat once the carriage doors were closed.


    ¡°Looks like you chose the wrong daughter,¡± King Berlon commented.


    ¡°No, they did,¡± Verista said with a laugh.


    King Berlon was uneasy with the arrangement. It wasn¡¯t often that Verista did things without consulting him. He knew that she was sure she had made the right decision. If not, she would already be second guessing herself and asking for his advice.Ensure your favorite authors get the support they deserve. Read this novel on Royal Road.


    ¡°What makes her special?¡± he asked. He had noticed the older daughter first. The girl was cheerful and pleasant, she was very pretty, and she was the daughter that Wright Kaldor had mentioned multiple times during their conversation. There was something strange about the younger one. She was one of those old souls, and behaved very unlike a child in the time he had seen her. She was polite, she was intelligent, but she was not childlike.


    ¡°She was intelligent,¡± Verista said. At the beginning, Verista had considered a betrothal between Robalt and Laureline. Not because the girl was pretty, but because Baronet Kaldor¡¯s wealth was impossible to ignore. Sooner or later, he would be elevated to a higher rank due to his contributions to the kingdom. It would be better to ally themselves to a man who was so driven to making money. However, she had preferred Sia over Laureline. The two sisters were silence and loudness, and she had heard more in Sia¡¯s silences than she¡¯d heard in Laureline¡¯s incessant prattling.


    Sia had made it abundantly clear why Laureline was unsuitable without directly saying so. It didn¡¯t make sense that such a young girl was so good at using words to her advantage, to drawing comparisons without arousing her older sister¡¯s suspicions. But she had, and Verista saw some part of herself in the little girl¡¯s audacity.


    ¡°The girl is very young to be stay away from her parents,¡± Berlon thought aloud.


    ¡°She is Robalt¡¯s age,¡± the queen said. ¡°And she will be better off in the castle. At least we do not dress children in cast-offs.¡±


    Berlon hadn¡¯t noticed, but when he thought of it, the clothes were part of the reason why she appeared so thin, so frail. He knew that in poorer families, children wore their elder siblings¡¯ clothings, but even there, clothing was altered to fit new owners. To think that such a rich family had not done even that for their daughter was nonsensical.


    ¡°Are you sure?¡± he asked.


    ¡°The mother looked aghast that the girl appeared in front of me. I believe they were planning to keep her in her room until we left,¡± Verista said.


    ¡°They might come to expect a betrothal between Sia and Robalt instead,¡± Berlon said.


    Verista shook her head. Hedith had appeared to believe Sia to be stupid, to be worthless. She doubted they would realize their daughter¡¯s value even in the face of clear evidence. They would think that the royals were odd for choosing their inferior daughter over their perfect Laureline.


    ¡°Do you think she is an illegitimate child they brought in?¡± Berlon wondered. ¡°Or an adopted child? Surely family would not be so negligent of their own child.¡±


    Queen Verista said, ¡°I do not know.¡±


    Blood was not always an indicator of loyalty or love. Sometimes it was just a burden to be borne, a binding that tied unwilling people together until someone made the difficult decision to cut everything between them.

 4.1 - The Gilded Girl

    Sia had only wanted to ruin the chance of Laureline being chosen by the queen. She had only come down because in this second life she didn¡¯t intend to let chances pass her by or do as her family desired. She remembered how it had gone the first time. The days after the royal visit had been ones of celebration in the manor. The queen had been charmed by Laureline, and Lord Kaldor was satisfied. The royal family had given him the rank of a Viscount and Laureline had become friends with Evana, the princess.


    She had only wanted to destroy their happiness, and instead had stolen it for herself. The queen had looked at her too closely and Sia had talked without thinking, about plants and rock gardens and politics and everything under the sun. In her previous life she had used the Kaldor library extensively, trying to make her father proud with her studiousness. The world was out of reach for her directly, and so she¡¯d tried to taste it through the pages of books, through novels and travel books written by explorers.


    If all that she was experiencing was a dream, it had taken a strange turn. While she was talking to the queen, she had been herself and not thought of the consequences. Dreams were bound to end and for a few hours at least, she thought she could do all of the things she had been scared to in the past. She thought she could wreak havoc without consequence.


    But the hours passed, and she was not descending into death. The manor rested in an angry silence. A maid had taken Sia to her room and left her there. She knew Fenix and Laureline would not have been sent to their rooms. After she heard the turning of the key from the outside, Sia settled into a chair by the window. The dream was not ending, which meant it wasn¡¯t a dream. It wasn¡¯t the afterlife. It was her own life, ten years before. The only thing that made sense was that she had been given a second chance.


    She laughed, because the chance had saved her. Without even fully knowing it, she had changed her life in one day. Her mother and father were furious. She could imagine her mother, furious and powerless. The queen had chosen Sia to join her in the capital, to be a lady in waiting to the princess. She didn¡¯t know what her father would think. Perhaps he would be happy that his least valuable child had yielded some benefit.


    From what she remembered of her childhood, Baronet Kaldor was a distant figure who never took interest in the details of raising his children. He provided Hedith with money, and was pleased with the outcomes excluding Ardisia. The door to her room clicked open, and a maid walked in.


    ¡°You¡¯ve been called to the lord¡¯s office, miss,¡± the maid said.


    Sia made her way to the room. It was a large room adjacent to the Kaldor library, and the rest of her family were already in the room. Her mother looked furious. Fenix was busy reading a book, and her father was as usual inscrutable.


    ¡°Good evening, father,¡± Ardisia said.Unauthorized usage: this narrative is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings.


    The last time she had spoken to her father was in her previous life. In that life, his expression had not be so neutral. He had hated her then, and she had felt like the mud on his boots. Something to be washed clean of as soon as possible.


    ¡°Ardisia, you disobeyed your mother today,¡± Baronet Kaldor said.


    ¡°I don¡¯t understand, father,¡± Sia said.


    ¡°You were instructed to stay in your room,¡± her father said.


    ¡°I was in my room, like I was told. I woke up because I heard voices in the garden, and looked out the window. A maid brought me downstairs. She told me mother called for me.¡±


    Sia pretended to be confused. She could play the part of the little girl who hadn¡¯t known better. After all, her mother hadn¡¯t told her to stay out of sight. In her past life, she had slept through the entire day with a fever. Wright looked at Hedith. It was only to be expected that she had done her job only half-way. His wife was beautiful, but she was lacking in many ways. She hadn¡¯t even instructed the child properly.


    In a way, it had been for the better. The queen had taken to Ardisia in a way he had not expected, and he could see Laurel had not been able to draw the same amount of interest. As it was, he had been concerned about what to do with his younger daughter. Even if Laureline was not chosen as the crown princess, she would face no shortage of suitors when she came of age. But Ardisia was not as beautiful, and she was strange. She was sickly on top of her strangeness, and he did not want to buy the heavy dowry that young men would demand to marry her. He could not have her marry beneath their rank and bring a bad name to the family.


    If she grew up in the capital, favored by the queen, she could make up for her deficiencies with whatever meager amount of power or connections she made in the castle. Their family physician was forever telling him that the girl¡¯s constitution was weak and that it was unlikely she would live long. But he doubted that claim now. She looked perfectly healthy. Even if she died in the castle, they could feign ignorance and the royal family would favor them out of guilt for taking their youngest child away from them.


    Hedith saw him thinking and cleared her throat. ¡°You cannot be thinking of sending her.¡±


    ¡°I cannot disobey a royal command,¡± Wright said. He could, but Hedith did not know better. ¡°It would be better for us to stay in her majesty¡¯s good graces. Is there any reason why Ardisia should not go?¡±


    ¡°It should have been Laurel,¡± Hedith said. The girl had entered the perfect situation and usurped Laurel¡¯s opportunity for herself. If it had only been Laureline and the queen together, the queen would have seen her daughter¡¯s charm and chosen her instead of Ardisia.


    ¡°If it was meant to be Laurel, the queen would have chosen her,¡± Wright retorted. ¡°It wasn¡¯t meant to be. Besides, Ardisia can pave the way for Laurel to enter the castle. I¡¯m sure she will speak favorably of her family when she is with the queen, especially of her sister. Will you not?¡±


    The queen might favor Ardisia at the moment, but that might change in months or years. The queen did not have the final say in who the crown princess would be, the prince would. Young men did not want conversation or introspective girls. They wanted beauty, and Laureline would be beautiful. In a way it was better. He would see a girl by his sister¡¯s side as an extension of his sister, as perhaps a childhood friend.


    ¡°Yes, father,¡± Ardisia lied. ¡°I will make sure the royal family knows how wonderful our family is.¡±