Oh, yes, Tyr. A blessing in disguise. Hel was such a nice place, I bet people were dying to get there. Just the kind of place I''d like to be in after losing our heaviest hitter.
''Marc,'' A quick side glance of acknowledgement. ''Do you feel as strange as I do?''
''I don''t know exactly how you feel, David.'' Well, that only made sense. We were both guys. ''But...this place is for those who die shamefully, as the Norse understood it. I died in battle, so I am unwelcome here, as far as the realm is concerned.'' You, on the other hand, should feel right at home was left unsaid. My lips twisted into a sardonic smile at what the Norse would have thought of my death. Oh, look at Silva, never having to kill and fight to survive, whining because people don''t read his rags. Getting a rope tie because strangers won''t acknowledge him.
Laughable...
''Come, you two.'' Tyr''s ravenous sword was now sheathed across his back. ''We must reach the gates.''
Much like the forest near Urziceni, time and distance in Hel seemed dictated by drama, as opposed to logic. We were moving, as far as my senses could tell, but the landscape, dead grass covering dry, grey hills like funeral shrouds over corpses, didn''t change.
Marc tried to scout ahead of us a few times, claiming he''d been dead far longer than me, and Tyr was too valuable to lose, but his ghostly speed, unbound by the laws of reality, didn''t get him anywhere. Each time, he stumbled back at out sides, looking for all the world like a bird that had smacked headfirst into a window. I hope Hel found it hilarious, because he definitely didn''t.
Frustrated by the bleak, unchanginc environment, and Marc''s pointless attempts to help us in any way, I decided to badger my other companion.
''Say...which of your hands did that wolf bite off? I forget,'' I smiled at Marc''s warning look. What the hell was Tyr going to do, kill me? Good job losing potential help. I''d have thought it would burn bridges with ARC too, but I doubted anyone in the organisation gave enough of a damn about me to ask for recompense from the Aesir.
''Remember the one I smacked you with? The other one.''
''Ah, I see. I''m glad you''re all right now.''
Tyr smirked. ''You have no idea how much we have mellowed out in this day and age, strigoi. In another time, I would have bitten your head off for that.''
''Sorry, not into that.'' I faked a long yawn. ''You know how some strigoi return from death because they still want to live?''
''Are you one of them?''
''No, I did the hemp pirouette of my own accord. But you should really bring those threats of yours when I show you the field in which I grow my fucks.''
Marcus stepped in between we could start trading more than words. ''Lord Tyr, are we any closer to the gates?''
''Yeah, are we there yet?'' I bared my fangs at Tyr''s irritated smirk. ''Because I''m ?this close to draining that overgrown worm-fodder of life and sending handyman back home to daddy in screaming pieces.''
The god shook his head, chuckling. ''Why are you even so angry at me, Silva? Is it because I honoured Heracles'' request to leave them behind? Or are you just shaken because I hit you and you felt it?''
I forced myself to laugh. ''That''s it? You think I''ve forgotten what pain is like? Or did you just cream yourself at the fact you''re no longer fated to become dogfood, and your brain got rattled-''
Tyr''s hand was suddenly crushing my neck, but I wheezed straight into his face. ''Kill me now, or I''ll eat you, right after a snack.''
''You are right, strigoi,'' Tyr said thoughtfully, ignoring my offer. ''I am indeed no longer fated to die to Garmr. Maybe I should take a leaf from Surtr''s book, and rewrite my destiny.''
I bet Surtr read as much as Tyr wrote, but I was too busy landing on my feet after he dropped me to point that out.
''You asked why I''m so angry at you?'' I called after the war god, who was purposefully stalking ahead. ''Maybe it''s the fact your pops dragged everyone into this shitfest because he couldn''t keep track of his stuff. Or maybe it''s the fact you abandoned those three to die, despite the fact I''m fucking unkillable to whatever that walking coal mine can do! I should have stayed to hold Surtr off! Why the fuck did you listen to Heracles?''
''Why doesn''t your god snap his fingers and make everything alright?'' he replied without turning. ''Why is he doing nothing to stop this crisis?''
''How should I know His ways-''
''Think, Silva. Why have none of the gods mightier than my father done anything to end this strife? Free will. Why is your god acting through you rather than intervening himself? Free will. Why did I honour a friend''s request?'' His gimlet stare pierced my soul as he looked over his shoulder. ''Free will. One day, you may learn we can only accept what others want.''
It was a quiet walk to Hel''s gates after that.
They appeared out of mist that was nowhere near enough to hide them. I supposed it was because we''d all poured our hearts out and were now best friends forever.
The slabs of black iron were almost as tall and broad as the mountainside they were set in, carved to look like-no. Not carved. The skeletons that stood out in relief were real bone, melted together and covered by iron.
They were nowhere near as grim as the thing guarding them, though. Garmr didn''t look like much, physically, though Cujo would have felt insecure next to him. But metaphysically, he was dripping with the thick, cold blood of every dead man who had tried to get past him, and was wearing their gore like armour.
The hound raised his head at Tyr''s approach, fur bristling in wariness. The war god hummed, tapping his fingers on his hip.
''Go ahead, you two. He''ll let you in, and I''m sure his mistress will welcome you. I want to try something.''
***
''I am glad the giant told you. I will not reiterate the facts.'' I thought Hel''s living half was beaming, though it was hard to tell with the dead one''s permanent rictus meeting its expression halfway through. The goddess was half beautiful, fair-skinned and fair-haired, and half hideous, with paper-thin skin than clung to prominent bones where it didn''t sag, or hang like ragged curtains to reveal shriveled organs.
She stood on a throne of yellowed bone, surrounded by every coward and wretch who had ever died believing in the Norse gods.
But those things, we had expected. They weren''t what concerned us.
One of the problems was her big brother, prowling around her throne with his fangs barred, looking quite prepared to huff and puff, and blow Odin''s house down.
The other problem was her even bigger brother, who had slunk away from Midgard after deciding he wanted to and could. I wasn''t sure how Jormungandr was positioned around and through Hel, but his head was definitely beneath us, given the scaled, shifting floor.
''I do not know where the head is, either. But fear not,'' That phrase always calmed people down. ''If one of you gives all he is to me, I will be able to achieve the clarity needed to help you find it.''
Before I could tell her to wait just a damn moment, or at least go over her offer with Marc, I realised I was alone. The Legionary was now standing on the steps of Hel''s throne. The goddess'' hand, gaving parted his ghostly plate, was now gripping his heart.
Marcus turned to look at me, a shaky smile on his face, which was becoming vaguer and vaguer while his body came apart. ''Told you...lived long enough, played at it...far too long. See this through to the end, David. That''s...an order...''
Not trusting my damned mouth, I leapt forward, barreling straight through the ghosts trying to stop me. My friend tried to push me away, still smiling, while Hel lay back in her throne, eyes rolled into the back of her head. I gripped Marcus''s arms, as if I could pll him back together and put myself in his place.
''You damned fool,'' I hissed, pointlessly directing my will at his unravelling self, trying to heal the spiritual rips, push my lifeforce into Marcus'' form. "N-Not...not even asking for my fucking opinion, eh? Just went ahead and sacrificed yourself?''
''If I didn''t do this,'' Marcus rasped. ''I''d be telling you that...instead...''
I was never able to tell him he had been right.
Marcus was only the first to go. Hel''s ghosts were drawn to their goddess like iron filongs to a magnet, and she shuddered as she consumed them, smoke rising from her flesh where bones broke through it. Hel spoke in tongues, in a language I didn''t understand but which made my ears bleed. I tried to keep my footing as the throneroom shook in the throes of the goddess'' oracular trance...and in the end, it was all for nothing.
The last thing I heard before my ears began ringing was that, despite the ritual that had burned up so many millions of ghosts, including one of my few friends, as fuel, she had been unable to see Mimir''s head.
Then, I saw black.
***
My first thought after I came to was that, damn, Thor looked really angry gripping Mjolnir like that as he stood above me.
My second thought was, when the hell had he gotten there? How long had I been out?
''...to answer your question,'' the god ground out. Damn, I didn''t remember asking anything, but that wasn''t a reason to get mad. ''With one of my own, strigoi: how could you do this?''
I looked down at his gesture, at Fenrir''s dismembered carcass scattered over Jormungandr''s cracked-open skull. At Hel''s corpse, split in half at the chest, which I was standing in.
I stumbled and fell on what had once been a paw, scrabbling against cracked scales to avoid landing on my face.
H-How...when...?
Thor...Thor had always hated the snake and wolf. I doubted there had been any love lost between him and Hel, either, but...f-fuck. Was...was I trying to justify this? They had not done anything, except... except-
...
My focus returned to the thunder god''s rambling.
''I don''t mean, how could you have the gumption to do this, Silva. I mean, you literally should not have been able to.'' He shook his head. ''We knew the Black God would use you to do something reckless, but...we did not expect this.''
''No, you did not,'' I agreed, letting the glamour over my hand fall away, revealing claws that dripped venom-Jormungandr''s first and last gift to me.
My hand plunged through the gullible moron''s chest and heart before he could even think to dodge or block. I laughed in his rapidly-paling face, leaping away to see him stagger.
He dropped the hammer first-expected. Then, he managed stumbled towards me, before falling at my feet.
Where they would all end up, one day.
''Nine paces, Thunderer,'' I crooned. ''It seems that, in the end, you didn''t have the heart to defy destiny. Just like poor Tyr...who never had a hand in his fate. Did you see him and the dog when you arrived? Don''t worry. You''ll meet them soon,'' I promised, patting my belly with one hand, while raising the corpse to my widening maw with the other.
Now...it was about time little David got to see his handiwork. Unlike other gods, I never claimed the credit for my servants'' accomplishments, be they unwitting or willing.
***
The divine remains still possessed enough distinguishing features to make me dry-heave when I finished retching. My throat burned from the god flesh that had passed through it, and felt raw even before I began spitting blood, trying to make sense of...of...
I ate people, a small corner of my mind whispered distantly. Like a strigoi would.
That small corner of my mind-which, in truth, was my truest self, and had never been small; in fact, it had been growing smarter and larger since my undeath-twisted my face into a broken grin. I began chuckling as tears ran down from my wide eyes, running down to mix with the blood, mine and theirs, spattering my chin.
My laugh, like jagged shards of glass rasping against each other, was answered by a joyous, booming, equally-twisted one.
Then Chernobog was looming above me, and everything became clear.
''Killing gods of other faiths without mercy or thought...a true man of Christ, David.'' Chernobog grasped my chin, forcing me to look up at him. His other hand lightly touched my iron-silver cross, turning it to a cloud of metallic dust. ''He suspected, you know?'' The Black God nudged half of Thor''s face with a clawed foot. The thunder god''s glassy, storm-grey eye was still narrowed in angry defiance. ''They all did. Let me coil up inside you, like a wasp larva in a caterpillar. Watched while I raped your mind...'' His featureless face split to reveal ivory teeth, bared in honest amusement. ''They knew I would reach out through you, and did nothing. Too concerned with peace and balance, the cowards will whine. Or they wanted me to strike down their rivals, or act as their proxy, others will admit. But...does that truly matter to you, David? I had you for so, so long...owned your body more completely than any woman ever did.''
He didn''t let me spit, either blood or insults, instead lifting me to his eye level with a clawed and around my abused throat. "Should I tell you what madness possessed the Dagda to kill the dragon? To drive the cold ones mad, and push everything into motion? He has always been a lover of nature and innocence. It was all he could do once he passed by those who had been maimed by Nidhogg, in revenge and the name of justice...just, don''t tell him the dragon never left Ygdrassil''s roots, let alone harmed anyone. It might drive him mad permanently, this time." He whispered, dropping me a heavy wink.
''Y-You-'' I managed to choke out before he shook me.
''No, David. I am just the lead of this play, not the playwright. I was the one who stole the head while everyone was losing theirs over the Dagda''s deed, though.''
''Then why?! If you''ve known where it was this whole time, why-'' His slap knocked two front fangs lose. I would never regrow them.
''Because the Aesir would never allow me, in person, to even come close to their tree. You and the other expendables, though? I must thank you for carving my path. And, you want to know the best thing?'' Chernobog leaned forward, wide mouth next to my bleeding ear. ''I just dropped it back in its well.''
And then he tossed me over Hel''s edge, never stopping from talking. ''The knowledge contained within its waters blinded them, for it was brighter in the aether than the one who once drank from them. Food for thought, David! You have all eternity to mull it over! Wouldn''t want you to get bored in Ginnungagap!''
Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit.
After the echoes of Chernobog''s last taunt faded, I fell for what felt like days, but I knew I couldn''t trust my senses in this not-place. There was nothing but shadows and silence, for as far as I could see. I couldn''t fly, though I didn''t know why. It was like a dream of falling, except this nightmare would never end.
***
Having drained the knowledge contained in the old god''s head, Chernobog decided to head to Earth, while everyone else were still wrapping their heads around it. He didn''t know if Thor had come to Hel based on a hunch, or if he had been the first sent and the others were coming; and, truly, he couldn''t pretend to care, either.
Even if they all dogpiled and killed him, he might as well give their beloved neutral world something to remember him by. Starting with that city David loved so much...
To Chernobog''s shock and disappointment, the first sight to greet him as he arrived in Bucharest were not screaming mortals, but his old, nearly-forgotten rival, blade raised to strike him down.
Chernobog blocked Belobog''s sword of light with a blade of shadow, putting Mimir''s drained head on his hip, letting it hang there from a knot of solid darkness. This cost him a dozen wounds, glowing tears in his black hide that light streamed from.
''Elsbeth Crane?'' he guessed. It was just like Zeus'' latest whelp to always expect the worst...spineless bitch. ''Is this how your power told you was the best way to fight me!?''
With a grunt, he broke through the sword, expecting the Belobog facsimile to fall apart under his strength, and reveal Crane. Maybe her rapist father and slut mother would want her back in pieces?
The White God fell apart, indeed, but there was nothing beneath the bright facade.
Because there had been no facade.
Chernobog glared up, and Nacht beamed down at him, laughing in the voice of a content murdered flaying a newborn at midnight. Hex stood on air, his partner''s dark form passing through and out of him. His stitches had been torn apart, and Night, in its purest form, filled his joints. Wide, black eyes twinkled with amusement, while a toothless, tongueless mouth spread wide, dripping darkness.
''Forgive the clich¨¦,'' the Black God began. ''But this is impossible. I destroyed your human bitch while you were still reeling from Thor''s strike, in the void. Without him as your link, you cannot manifest in the universe.''
''Indeed! You left me alone with naught but my fears and hatred, Chernobog...cruel, cruel soul that you are. But I am the darkness in men, not just the absence of light. Fear, hatred, greed...and so, so much more. I can bring them all out, but I never truly tried it on myself until you left me...indisposed. I must thank you for that!'' Hex clapped slowly, sarcastically. ''I have never loathed or loved a man as much as I do Hex, you know? He is...the darkness inside me. It was the easiest thing for me to reach for what darkened my heart, and bring him back from oblivion. With him returned, I was free to act again!''
''If you''re done gargling your own cock,'' Chernobog tilted his head. ''I have a question. Two, actually. Are you controlling him now? Have you switched the literal strings for metaphorical ones? And...Belobog. Did you search for the darkness in my heart, and brough forth the object of my loathing?''
''Those were three questions, Black God~'' Hex grabbed his white long coat, opening wide to reveal darkness no light could ever pierce. A white head, featureless but for a pair of antlers, emerged from it, followed by Belobog''s body and sword. Chernobog scoffed. If all they could do was bring back his rival whenever he was destroyed, he-
Another White God strode out of the darkness, crossing his sword over the first one''s. Then, two more. Eight. Sixteen. Thirty-two.
Chernobog backed away, cursing, spinning in place to keep track of the thousands and thousands of White Gods Nacht had spun from his fears, each as powerful as the last.
''I would question your bad luck, Chernobog, but...you should have never harmed Emil,'' Nacht leered, moving Hex''s right hand down his side, to his hip, then lower. ''He is my chain and cell and jailor, and I will break him one day. But he is mine.'' The leer dropped off Hex''s face, the impossibly wide smile returning. ''But enough about fear! What if the possibility you hate the most came true?''
''Do it, bastard,'' Chernobog breathed, fending off half a dozen Belobog clones as they circled him. Power that would have turned stars to nothing was shackled by their godly wills, so that even this dingy side alley was left untouched. ''Bring the pantheons here. They will trample you to nothing fighting over what I bear.''
Nacht laughed. ''It seems you are dimmer than I remember. Or...not? Hmm...more short-sighted, perhaps. I am talking about David Silva, Black God~ or, rather, what he will become.'' Hex leaned forward, hands on his knees. ''You saw the shadow of his destiny, and tried to snuff it out? A god, of all things, should know that never works. Should I reach forward through time, and bring him here and now? No...I think I shall not. Wouldn''t want the Fixer feeling I am threatening his prot¨¦g¨¦...''
***
I fell through a shadow, and down onto Bucharest''s streets. I didn''t know which area, exactly, but I knew the city''s smell. Before I could get my bearings, though, Chernobog was on me.
''Damn you,'' he snarled. ''That thing and its puppets will kill me, but before...before...'' A mad grin split his face as he raised a shrunken head with his free hand. Despite the grey skin and blank eyes, I recognised the face of the god of memory. But before I could speak, Chernobog pressed its forehead against mine.
''You should have died. You will regret living. If I am to pass tonight, I shall happily do so, knowing every god and man will hunt you for what you are.'' The head began cracking in his grip. ''I took away what it knew, not what it does. It cannot think anymore, for it is dead, but it knows everything about everything it sees. I wonder if seeing the world like that will drive you mad before the gods cut you apart for your knowledge.''
And Mimir''s head shattered, its godly perception flowing from its eyes into mine, showing me the truenamesofeverythingpastpresentfuturewhatcouldbewhatshouldneverhavebeenSTOPSTOPSTOPTHISISNOTASTHINGSSHOULDBE-
***
Lucas put a comforting hand on his apprentice''s shoulders. Zmei never felt cold, so any shudders from them were usually theatrical, but...he had the feeling Mia was not fooling around.
''Someone just walked over my grave,'' she hissed, fangs clenched. ''I m-must...'' Mia was out of the shop before she finished her sentence. Cursing, Lucas bounded after her.
***
''He passed Mimir''s sight along,'' Hex mused, kicking Chernobog''s remains aside to squat over the wild-eyed, babbling strigoi. ''Nacht...Silva was a gullible fool, but he does not deserve this. Do you have a way to cure this...madness?''
''I do not, Hex. But she might.''
Normally, Hex was loath to involve civilians in what they did. But when the zmeu girl, claiming to have felt ''something wrong'' in their current location, began making crosses out of thin air, he decided to make an exception.
Now, if only she could stop crying enough to do whatever she believed would save her friend...
Turned out, Silva was more loved than Emil, or even the strigoi himself, perhaps, knew.
A bigger, three-headed blue male zmeu touched down a few metres from the female, two heads taking in the scene. The middle one raised a questioning eyebrow.
For the first time in his life, Hex did not know what to do.
***
There was no light at the end of the tunnel for me. Only darkness, and two figures, both painfully bright, both vaguely humanlike, floating in the void.
I knew what this was, without needing to be told. Though I hadn''t been judged like this after my first death. But they knew everything there was to know about me, without needing to ask anything.
''TAKE MY HAND, DAVID,'' the first figure said. ''YOU WILL GO WHERE YOU HAVE ALWAYS BELONGED, AND KNOW NOTHING MORE OF THIS WORLD AND ITS STRIFE. I ASK ONLY THAT YOU FIND PEACE.''
''TAKE MY HAND, DAVID,'' the second figure said. ''YOU WILL BE RETURNED TO LIFE, FREE TO SHAPE THE WORLD AND THE LIVES OF ITS PEOPLE. I WILL RESHAPE YOUR MIND TO FIT CHERNOBOG''S UNASKED-FOR BOON, AND MADNESS WILL LEAVE YOU. BUT YOU WILL NEVER KNOW PEACE, FOR MAN AND GOD ALIKE WILL HUNT YOU FOR WHAT YOU ARE AND KNOW. YOU WILL NEVER SEE THE AFTERLIFE. BUT YOU WILL SEE AS MIMIR SAY, AND POSSESS KNOWLEDGE AS NO MAN EVER HAS. I ASK ONLY THAT YOU LET ME WATCH EVENTS UNFOLD.''
After that, it was obvious-both my choice, and the identity of the beings. I took the second figure''s hand, turning to scowl at the first. ''That shining disguise cannot hide what you are,'' I said warningly.
''INDEED, DECEIVER,'' the second figure told the first. ''YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOO ENAMOURED OF YOUR MASKS AND PAWNS, PEOPLE WHOSE HEARTS YOU DO NOT TRULY KNOW. TAKE THIS ONE, FOR EXAMPLE. YOU TOLD ME HE BELONGED TO YOU.''
''ALL MEN HOLD YOU IN THEIR HEARTS. THE GREAT ONES FIRST AMONG THEM.''
The second figure shook its head, amused, then leaned forward, letting me see its horns. ''I LOVE YOU HUMANS,'' he said with a crooked smile, morningstar-bright eyes shining. ''YOU NEVER REFUSE KNOWLEDGE!''
And then, there was light.
***
Mia''s worried face, scales gleaming with tears, greeted me after I...after I came back to life. The second time. She held a needle and thread of golden light in her claws, praying to whatever gods listened to let it work, dammit, while she stitched my head back onto my body. Her eyes weren''t the usual red, but a white so bright it hurt. The first figure reaching down into the world, for His opposite already had. The guiding light left her eyes only after the stitches circled my neck. They burned briefly, before fading into my pale flesh.
I rubbed my neck, feeling the old, reassuring texture of my noose marks, before taking in the devastated sight that spanned city blocks around us. It looked like a mage army had gotten high, then tried to LARP while using the Necronomicon as a guidebook. Nonsensical colours, impossible shapes and tears in spacetime, leading to places man had never been meant to see, for hundreds of metres around, despite the ARC agents hard at work cleaning up the new eldritch landmarks. The result of me speaking, with Mimir''s inherited perception telling me the true name of everything I saw, and making me speak it without thought, for my mind hadn''t been able to deal with it.
I turned to Mia, determined to avoid starting my new life-dealt with the Devil, my strigoi side snickered in my mind, sounding clearer than ever-with a lame line.
''Crying doesn''t suit you,'' I rasped, forcing myself to sit up, bones cracking. Clearly, Mimir hadn''t been a god of knowledge pertaining to being a ladies'' man.
But she hugged me, and, when she told me to shut up and preserve my face, they still weren''t sure whatever had happened to me, she didn''t sound exasperated.
Look at me, so much game I was a...a...
Blackness, again.
***
''I can''t believe you killed me,'' I told Mia for the third time, staring at the whitewashed ceiling of the ARC infirmary as I lay back in bed. Her provisional uniform-killing an agent, even for his own good, not to mention getting involved into the the Headhunt mess, as it was called now, from her own volition, meant she either had to work with us for a time, until she was proven trustworthy, or accept a silencing enchantment being placed on her- wrinkled from all the times she''d fussed over me, not to mention the numerous occasions she''d fidgeted with it when I didn''t need anything.
''I know, right? That wasn''t how I imagined taking your head,'' Her smile didn''t reach her eyes, which were darting over the room for something, anything she could use to help me recover from my skull-splitting headache, or the numbness that spanned my whole body. ''But at least I learned to add bladed edges to my constructs. Only way to keep you down, really, until...''
''Necessity is the mother of invention,'' I agreed. ''Never cross me again, though. Please.''
Mia growled to mask her snicker. ''The fact you''re abed is the only reason I''m not folding you in half for that pun.''
''You''ll have plenty of time for that later,'' I joked. ''Let''s stick to kissing for now, alright?''
''Implying we''ve started,'' she scoffed, before her eyes softened. ''David...I don''t want you to feel you "have" to be with me because I helped you, or something. Or...'' Mia snorted, laughing at herself. ''The fuck am I even saying? You''re barely able to think straight again, and here I am with this bullshit. Like my teasing isn''t enough.''
''I don''t mind that,'' I blurted out, unknowingly sealing my fate. ''And...it''s not because of that. I am grateful, yes, but...I think we should give it a chance. Being grateful is as good a basis as any.''
''You asked for it,'' she said in mock warning, sitting down on the edge of my bed. My room-cell, really-was covered in crosses, metal, carved and painted alike, in case the strigoi went crazy again and ARC had to keep me contained before they out me down.
They were far more busy fending off the pantheons these days, though, when they weren''t working together to heal Yggdrasil. Several gods wanted me dead (and Loki hadn''t gotten over his children''s deaths at my-Chernobog''s-hands, not that I could blame him; I should''ve never been so damned stupid as to be made into that bastard''s sock puppet) so working for them, and I''d even gotten some marriage threats-er, offers. Odin had proposed having me on loan, as an advisor and liaison between Asgard and ARC. The division Heads, and the Directorial Council, the faceless black suits overseeing each country of the Global Gathering ARC operated in, were still discussing that idea. But, before that...
''So,'' Mia smiled, pushing my covers aside with one hand, the other grabbing my hair as she leaned forward so she could look into my eyes-scarlet with black slits, boring into my once-black, now blank, ivory orbs. ''Kissing?''
''It''s a start.''
Sidestory: Fae Play
At first, I needed to pass through Ireland. The Fae have always been uneasy around outsiders, even if those outsiders are guests they invited themselves. Perhaps especially then. And if the guest is similar enough to the Fair Folk to invoke familiarity, but strange enough to to make them uneasy? Even worse. I have been told that, from their perspective, iele are like peacocks with no feathers, trying to sing like people.
I was extremely flattered at the comparison.
As such, the Fae couldn''t accept one such as me entering their territory directly. Luckily, the Emerald Isle was neutral ground, at least when it came to supernatural politics. Purely because the locals hated their neighbours so much they couldn''t go to war, or everyone would lose.
''Are we there yet?'' I asked, not looking at my guide.
The barghest growled. When I''d first heard who would be guiding me, I''d expected an oversized, monstrous dog, not...this. But the word ''barghest'' supposedly formed as a combination of "burh" and "ghest". So, town-ghost.
The translucent, stocky man floating ahead of me seemed to be in a perpetual bad mood. But, perhaps I shouldn''t have been surprised. He was British, after all. And dead.
"You feel like we''re there?'' he asked in a gravelly voice. First time he''d talked since my arrival.
''Well, no. Not really...''
''Then we ain''t.''
I swallowed a cutting retort. No need to waste my voice on this grump. I needed it at its best for my upcoming performance.
The Fae were holding a celebration, though you would be hard-pressed to get an answer if you asked why. Personally, I think they''re grateful the Royal Army hasn''t sprayed all of their holdings with iron dust. And this time, they wanted a foreign element, someone with a new talent, a new perspective.
The Fae also had singers who could jerk emotions around like puppets on strings, so that wasn''t why they asked for me.
After the Shattering, their realm, Faerie or Elfhame, was one of the first to solidify into being, because the legends about them were so old and widespread. It sent the Brits running from the mainland back to their island. You can''t help beat the Nazis down when the Wild Hunt is tearing up your backyard.
Heavens, I hoped the Hunters wouldn''t be present too. The Hunt''s leader was always a vile bastard, whoever held the mantle at the moment, be it Odin, Gwyp ap Nudd or the Devil. At least Herne and the Erlking were getting brushed aside more often nowadays.
If you thought personality disorders were a pain, you should see that mantle getting jerked around.
The barghest plodded through the wet, misty moor, while I floated alongside him, my human mask discarded for the time being. Perhaps after this was done, I could pretend to be a lost woman. Then, when some monstrous creep came for me, I could turn the tables on him.
There were far too many of those in Northern Europe.
Eventually, we reached the Lughstone. When the Romans had come to Britannia, the Tin Isle, they had interpreted the local gods, as they were wont to do. And so, Lugh was associated with Mercury, and people started seeing him as a god of travelling. The stone, placed by Lugh himself, could grant quick passage to any realm the god knew of, if your will was strong enough.
He found the whole thing pretty amusing. Whenever he came out of the Eioch Cluster, to walk the Earth, Lugh claimed that there were worse things to be associated with than travel and Mercury.
He also claimed the Romans had been smart not to equate him with Apollo, or worse, Jupiter.
The Shattering had changed the fabric of reality, just when Einstein was starting to understand it, and teach people about it. And so it was that, besides the mundane universe we lived in, there were also an infinity of alternate realities, as well as higher dimensions, with each transcending the one beneath it like a human is beyond a drawing on paper.
And then there were the dimensionless things beyond that, born of Lovecraft''s mad genius. Thankfully, most of them were too vast to perceive dimensioned space.
There were also the Clusters, macrocosmic structures that reflected the beliefs of theists. Creation could not contain so many conflicting cosmologies and supreme beings inside a single realm, so it split itself apart.
You would be surprised how many ancient people believed the world was a flat expanse of land surrounded by ocean. Though, I suppose they did not, could not, know better back then. But the old stories remained, so the Clusters formed. Named after their creator deity or force, they existed alongside our universe, linked but separate. The Kaos Cluster, the Odin Cluster, the Ra Cluster...
I had asked David, once, if he would like to visit the Yahweh Cluster. He''d claimed he was unworthy.
Still, it made one think about coincidences. About patterns and the collective unconscious. Why an underworld, middle world and world above, in so many cultures? Why so many world trees and pillars and turtles and elephants? How could ancient civilizations that had never met one another think so alike?
Perhaps there was something behind the scenes, guiding and shaping mankind''s thoughts. Maybe Constantin''s theory, of a multi-faceted supreme being, was not just a theory.
The Lughstone was a representation of Lugh in his triple aspect: three faces, three manhoods. There was a reason he was such a popular god.
Or, rather, several reasons.
''Well?'' the barghest asked gruffly. ''Grab it.''
''Of course.'' I turned to him with a sarcastic smile. ''Is there a certain part I should grab, or...''
''If ye wanna shag stone, be my guest. But do it on yer own time. I''m supposed t'' drag yer arse to the Fair Folk, and I''m gonna do it.''
I touched one of Lugh''s faces, and it seemed to me like it smiled. The Lughstone began to shine like the Sun, and we were gone.
Faerie was just not as I''d expected. It was greater, in every detail. The air was sweeter, the grass greener, the sun brighter, the people happier.
Because not all Fae are cold monsters obsessed with mischief and mayhem. The common people are similar enough to mankind, with much of the same fears and joys, hopes and worries, for all that they are immortal.
The Fae peasants nodded and smiled at me as I walked through the city. Their rulers must have passed along the news, because no one stopped me to demand answers from the strange, floating woman. The barghest and I walked to the middle of the city, and through the garden leading to Oberon and Titania''s castle. High in the sky above us, I could see the bottom of the Hill that rose above Faerie. Symbolism made fact.
''Here''s where we part,'' the barghest said when we reached the unguarded, multi-coloured gate. It was so tall I couldn''t see the top, even if I craned my head up, and the towers of the castle rose far higher, piercing the cloudless sky, and perhaps even the bottom of the Hill.
''I have not been in Faerie before,'' I said, trying not to sound nervous. ''How am I supposed to find my way to the ballroom?''
''The monarchs will send someone fer you.''
''You are wrong, frowning one,'' a new, amused voice cut in. ''They already have.''
We looked around for the source of the voice, until the clearing of a throat drew our eyes downwards.
Oh, Puck.
The little Fae, straight out of Shakespeare''s play, as he liked to present himself. Oberon''s informer and wetwork specialist, when he wasn''t moonlighting as court jester.
Puck was looking up at me, eyes glinting with amusement, bearded face dominated by an earsplitting grin. I could not tell what he was wearing, except that it was sheer, and at times, he looked like he was naked.
"Come on now, lady mine. ''Tis coming, your time to shine." He said, turning around and walking towards the gate with a spring in his step. It opened by itself, because even doors knew better than to cross Puck.
"Since when do you talk in rhymes? You don''t, in the stories." I said, pacing myself not to leave him behind, though I fully knew he could outrun me, short legs or not.
Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.
"Ah! ''Tis, how you say, a... fleeting passion. A trend! Yes, a trend. You see, I learned of this Gaiman fellow, who was writing comical books about gods. I do not understand the term, since they were more grim than comical, but you know how humans are...anyway, this lad''s works introduced me to the world of comical books! There''s this one about a demon who talks in rhymes, and is appreciated by few, though he does good work. It resonated with me..."
As we travelled twisting, shimmering corridors, Puck regaled me with tales of his favourite comics, and asked if I wanted to see his Etrigan collection. I told him that maybe I would, after the ball.
The ballroom seemed to appear out of thin air as we turned a corner. The floor and ceiling looked like they were made of a myriad of giant butterfly wings, which beat when you looked at them from the corner of your eye. Fae lords and ladies gathered in cliques, taking food and drink from silver trays born by pixies who were visibly straining under the weight. Sometimes, they took the pixies themselves, and ate them alive, smiling as they screamed. The remaining pixies were then chastised for letting trays drop and dirty the floor.
My lip curled. None of this was new to me-you cannot live with my sisters and remain thin-skinned-but that didn''t make it easier to stand. Maybe my songs could touch their hearts, and help them become better.
I turned to look down at Puck, but he had already left my side, moving through the crowd and mingling with everyone.
Like a shark among minnows.
I realized the ball itself hadn''t started, because the Monarchs weren''t present. Neither was Mab, or the Cat Sith, or any god.
Or any Hunter, thank the heavens.
I looked around, unsure where to go, who to talk to, when a raised stage flashed into being in the middle of the room. Oberon and Titania were standing on it, smiling, in all their finery. They were both tall and lean, pale and fair, and there was nothing human in their faces.
Oberon had curly, short dark hair, and looked like he was laughing at a joke only he understood. Titania had long, straight, copper-coloured hair, and was looking at her subjects with a mix of affection and pity.
''My friends!'' Oberon began. ''Tonight, we have a iela among us. Coming from the wilds of Dacia, we hope her voice will bring a short succour in our long lives. After all, what is immortality, save endless time to contemplate boredom?'' Dacia? He knew very well no one used that name anymore.
The crowd laughed, toasting their King, eating a few more pixies. Oberon''s smile then thinned, and he spoke in a voice affecting regret.
''Sadly, the brightest stars of our court will not be attending...''
"Mab is walking mankind''s dreamscape, all over Britannia." Titania said. "The midwife is performing her duty, helping give birth to man''s dreams. It is said," Titania leaned forward, conspiratorially. "That she has grown tired of her kin, and now finds comfort amongst humanity..."
The crowd shrieked in outrage at that, screaming accusations, tearing at each other with nails and teeth, with cutlery and shards of broken glass. They cursed their fellows for driving Mab out with their foolish antics, with their boorish behaviour. By the time they were done, only half the crowd was standing, and none of them was unwounded. The monarchs looked upon their work, and found it good.
I find it necessary to mention that these were the Seelie Fae: the champions of good, mankind''s allies in the fight against the Unseelie and the monsters in the dark beyond the fires. But, while the Seelie could be kind enough to men, their bottled up viciousness had to be unleashed somewhere. And why not other Fae?
Without another word, the Fae rulers, floated off the stage, and I reluctantly took their place. Dammmit. The ball was just starting, and I was already shaken. But I couldn''t show weakness. I couldn''t bleed in the water with so many sharks around.
I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind, and began singing.
Not human songs-they had not called me here for that. For all that the Fae acted like we were still living in the Iron Age, they fully understood electronics. If they''d wanted human music, they''d just have looked up something on YouTube and put it on loop.
More channels than you might expect are Fae fronts, and more internet trolls actual trolls.
I sang to touch their ears and minds, because I did not have souls to work it. I sang of good and kindness, courage and charity, but they just nodded and hummed along. They were Seelie, and they understood such things, when they needed to. They wanted something more...lurid.
Oberon and Titania brought forth a child, barely a teen, in a white dress and red slippers. My heart sank at the sight of them. I knew what they meant.
This child had been stolen from a dangerous household, they said, and a changeling left behind to torment the callous parents. She was much happier here, for how could she not be?
They asked for lurid songs, and promised child would dance to them.
And I sang. I sang of war at home and abroad, of the Ottoman yoke and the Impaler''s cold justice. And the Fae tore at each other, while the child danced and danced, until her feet bled, until they were redder than the slippers.
And they roarer, and urged me to go on.
I sang my throat hoarse, and the child danced and wept, until she could not stand anymore, could not catch her breath.
She fell to the floor, but still tried to dance.
When I could not sing anymore, I excused myself, blaming my raw throat, and the Fae lamented, but still applauded. With a shaky smile, I floated off the stage, and hurried out of the ballroom. The Fae cried out behind me, asking me to stay for the rest of the ball, or at least take Puck with me, if I wanted to leave. But nobody tried to stop me.
Somehow, I found my way out of the castle and into the garden. It was night, and the city was quiet as a tomb, with a cold mist hanging over it, filled with will o''wisps.
On one of the ornamental carved stones, the child sat and wept. She was not wearing the red slippers anymore, because her feet were gone.
I rushed to her, taking her hands into mine and asking what had happened, when had it happened, and why.
''Because I could not dance until the end.'' And she spoke no more. She did not seem to be bleeding, or in pain, but I could not leave her here. The Fae did not mutilate valued servants, so she might as well have had ''banished'' written on her forehead.
I gathered her in my arms and rushed to the Lughstone, flying high over the city, riding the winds. I would find her a place in the human world, if it was the last thing I did.
We reached the Lughstone, and I grabbed one of the faces so hard it cracked. In moments, we were back on that misty Irish moor.
The child was laughing, and at first, I thought she was laughing in joy.
Then, I looked at her face, and saw the mad grin, the feverish eyes.
''Such a bleeding heart,'' she crooned in a broken voice that made my skin crawl. I tried to throw her away from me, but she clung to me like a spider. ''You thought this dreary world held the key to my joy. You though you could take me, without my masters knowing and allowing your folly. Oh, you stupid girl...''
And she laughed and laughed, aging before my eyes, until I was holding a hideous, toothless crone.
''Faerie was the only thing keeping me alive,'' she hissed, sticking her wrinkled, gaunt face into mine. "I was taken seven of your decades ago, and kept young only by that realm''s magics. Now, time has caught up with me. I hope you are happy, murderess."
And she laughed again, a sharp, mad sound, as she died in my arms, turning to dust, until I was holding a cracked, grinning skull.
Damn them.
Damn the Fae and their pointless, twisted games.
Sidestory: Of Events Past and Things to Come
???
...And a good day to you, too, comrade General Secretary. But I can tell, by your eagerness, that you are far more interested in my file than my manners. Dare I do something outrage-
*recording faulty? Several crashes and indistinct sounds*
A-Apologies...f-for the joke in poor taste. P-Please call them o-off...
A-Ahem...
You might be unsurprised to learn that comrade Aaron comes from humble origins-as humble as possible for a creature like him. This might explain his lack of respect towards protocol, almost apolitical tendencies, and other traits that are barely compensated for by his competence and power. This...is what we managed to gather...
[Redacted] forest, Bra?ov, Romania, 194x[redacted by order of the General Secretary after perusal of the file]
The zmeu is hunting.
That is not a surprise. In all his years-the whole handful of them-he has never met one of his kind who was not a predator. Manipulation, extortion, maneating...then there are the ones who prefer to favour flesh in rather different ways.
He shares these urges, of course. However, he has not heeded them, so far. He does not know the others like him, here in the mountains, are pariahs, even among their newly-formed society, which is itself prone to extremes.
The zmeu is not a member of society, either of his kind or the greater Romanian one.
Nor does he know his parents. This is not unusual, either. His kind are not attached to their children. What is unusual, however, is the strength of his father, and the nature of his mother, who was a zmeu only long enough to bear him.
And the brothers he has not met yet.
The zmeu is not hunting out of hunger. He cannot starve to death, though hunger is annoying. He is hunting-animals-to prevent himself from doing something worse.
The bear has torn apart a young, overconfident hunter. A human unsettled by the changes brought by the Shattering, trying to calm himself down by killing something he knows, something that makes sense.
The hunter used to read while resting. As the zmeu tears the bear apart, he notices the book fallen on the grass, next to the hunter''s corpse.
''A-Aron Pum-nul...'' he speaks haltingly, parroting the big, bold letters on the cover. The stern, wise-looking human on the cover, he thinks, looks admirable.
So far, the zmeu has only heard human curses. He is still learning Romanian. He does not know this, but the man on the cover has helped bring the modern language into being, along with his students. His works will now help the zmeu master it.
***
[Redacted], Bra?ov, Romania, 196x
Aaron has met his parents once-entirely too many times, in his opinion.
His father spends his time in zmeu country, for his voice alone would shatter the Earth. The behemoth, with his myriad mountain-swallowing maws and rainbow scales, is everything they say about their kind.
If he came to sleep around the world, he''d sleep around the world, provided he did not pulverise it by twitching.
His mother is far, far worse. Aaron used to think his father a coward for having and abandoning him, but...
His eyes cross and bleed as he remembers a fraction of her form-all angles and no curves. Where did the old lizard find the insanity to...to...
Aaron shakes his head. One of his brothers is near, and the other not too far. He knows, as surely as he knows the fire in his blood and the fangs in his jaws.
His brothers hatching in his stomping grounds is pure, stupid coincidence. Perhaps the two old monsters have a favourite mating spot here, though it''s hard to imagine his father-Maws, he decides; his whole name, really a description of his body, is a mouthful-shapeshifting to become small enough to fit anywhere on Earth, let alone mating without wiping out the sun and everything around it.
As he hunts, his instincts briefly hesitate. No, both brothers are near. And...
Aaron bursts through trees, breaking them into kindling, to see a little green zmeu-barely more than a hatchling, really, smaller than some human children-held in the three maws of a bigger, blue one.
Aaron tears his youngest brother away with one hand, backhanding the blue zmeu to the ground with the other.
''Why?'' he demands in a growl, holding the mewling hatchling close to his chest. The bite wounds are already healing, but...
The zmeu who will become Lucas sneers. He does not know how to speak yet, but his growl says ''rival'' as he glares at their younger brother with blue eyes.
What a family he has...well, he supposes his teens are not too early to raise children. It''s not like he''s their father...
The hatchling wraps around his hand, purring, while the blue one bares his fangs, crossing his arms in a huff as he stares up at him.
No. He is definitely their father, in all but fact.
***
New Centre, Bucharest, 1992
Lucian strokes his goatee as they walk into the club. It''s his second time staying in Bucharest, and far happier than the first, at the moment. Miri would not have been found anywhere near a place like this before the Revolution-she is a vampire, and a woman of class besides-but, with the regime change, people are unsure, experimenting.
Lucian has been getting into vampires recently. He likes them, too, or so he tells himself.
Lucian was raised by a brother who repeatedly told and showed him zmei who give in to their impulses are executed. The images of preventive castration, in the cases of zmei with insatiable appetites, improper orientations, or just dubious personalities(they will have to come up with new terms, now that the reds are gone) were not really necessary to get the message across, but they helped. Aaron beat self-control into him, and he''s thankful.
There''s a iela singing tonight, and every night, the posters promise. Lucian takes one look at her, alone on the stage, and wearing a shift so sheer he''s not sure it''s there, and admonishes himself for his thoughts, then realises that''s stupid. Thoughtcrime is not a thing anymore.
He''ll still have to tell Miri, of course. For penance. The vampire tears open his neck(his kind cannot be turned, so there is no danger besides pain, and he regenerates in moments) for every improper thought and action. He tells himself she keeps him honest.
Soon, Lucian will look back on this relationship, and realise how unhealthy it was.
''I''m surprised you agreed to come.'' His wings rub against the holes in his leather jacket with a sound like knives on skin.
''Of course!'' She favours him with a radiant smile. No fangs, of course. He knows it''s fake. She''s only happy when baring them, and vice versa. ''The owner is an old friend, you see...''
''Yeah?'' He takes in the smoky room, and realises how bland it is, besides the posters about the iela. Are the walls even painted? They don''t smell like it...and why are there only humans inside?
''Indeed. In fact, I believe he will soon become a friend of yours, too.''
If the owner is a vamp, Lucian thinks it''s extremely likely the only friendship struck tonight will be between his fist and the leech''s face.
Then the iela begins to sing, and he realises what is wrong: everything.
Lucas, in-between his "walks" and painting sessions, has taught him to hone his arcane sense. For survival, of course, though Lucian has mostly used it to play hide, seek and find with ghosts. But, for the first and last time in decades, he thanks his brother.
The iela''s song is chaining the patrons to the club. Not physically, nothing so blunt. Rather, to the idea of it, and the suggestion that they like it. With the Security dismantled, ARC still setting up shop and no national agency at the moment, there is no one to notice such crimes, besides people like him.
But this is so obvious he''s almost baffled. If he, with the arcane sight of a myopic rhino, can spot this, why the hell hasn''t some supernatural with enough power and something vaguely resembling a moral compass closed this down?
Lucian narrows his eyes, and notices the iela is chained too, also to the idea of the club. Controlled, too? A puppeteer having her strings pulled?
The zmeu is eating concrete one moment later, Mirela straddling his back in a way more unpleasurable than even their usual, lamentable romps. Is she in on this shit, or being driven crazy (er), or what?
''We knew you''d be distracted, you bleeding heart,'' she croons, one clawed hand around his throat, the other over his heart. She''s trying to tear through his scales, get at the blood.
The first option, then. He always picked "a" on tests, anyway.
"But do not worry! We know you cannot be brought into the fold, by force or not. I have given you so many little deaths," only about three real ones, but he''s good at faking. ''Let me give you the true one, too. You walk around here too often to be allowed to live.''
As she taps into her inner gloater, the other vampire comes into the room out of a door behind the stage, running like a bat out of...heh.
Both of them are skilled enough to use their full strength without collateral damage. Good. He is, too, though he''d likely lose in close quarters to two peers unable to feel wounds or exhaustion.
Good thing he always has his mace. He''s never unarmed, either.
Lucian summons his mace in hand as they drag him down, and realises its enchantment, wrought by the Mother of the Forest in exchange for his and his brothers'' services (flames, his crotch still ached just thinking of that hag) will not be able to permanently destroy the vamps. He could reduce them to quantum foam, or nothing at all, and they''d heal instantly, because his weapon is not holy.
Then Lucian peers through the windows, and sees a church in the distance, far beyond where the patrons could see, even if their perceptions weren''t addled. He glances at the iela, at the anger beneath her smiling mask, and sees the aetheric chains extending between the tall, stocky male vamp''s eyes and her neck.
This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.
The zmeu resolves himself. Recently, he''s been reading about some American batting sport, and looking for a chance to try it.
Well, Lucian thinks as he swings his mace through the vamps with the intent to destroy them, he might as well take them to church.
He and the iela do not become a couple. Neither of their species is built for constant relationships, and they do not have the temper for sharing themselves with anyone besides each other. She is only into men half of the time, anyway. But Bianca, a human name he suggests to her as the vamps are burned with holy fire and the thralls taken away for rehabilitation, is not deterred. As she explains that night while they explore each other, out of nothing but curiosity and lust, they tell themselves, they can still be friends.
Many years later, they will meet three young men: one gloomy and descending into despair, one still recovering from the demands of distant parents and looking to form his own family, and one who has been walking with death since birth, and will continue long after his death, which, as far as everyone will know for a long time, will be due to the asthma he had been born with.
They will also meet an old bear, who will be as much of a father to them as they will be older siblings or surrogate parents to their younger friends.
He will take a long time to be a father, rather than a parent, to his own blood, though.
***
Muspellheim, 2030
Odin does not arrive by means of the Bifrost. The runes are his to speak and carve, and the tree he has raised is his to walk.
As such, he simply moves, without moving, from his throne room to this blighted, stifling realm the moment his ravens, who have remembered they are supposed to be useful, inform him everything is going wrong.
His ragged travelling cloak has been discarded for armour as grey and weathered as he is. In one hand, he clutches Gungnir. In the other, he holds destruction, shaped into a glowing rune and ready to unleash at any moment. His ravens perch on his pauldrons, their eyes seeing even more than his can.
Not that he needs sharp sight to spot the fire giant, or the victims at his enormous feet.
The Romanians have been torn apart, and burned-he is not sure which is which, even their souls are charred. The Olympian brat has been cut to pieces, still snarling defiance at his opponent as Surtr sneers down at him.
''We should have ripped you apart, too!'' Odin calls to get his attention, raising Gungnir. ''Though I''m not sure even my brothers and I could make anything worthwhile from your carcass. At least that frozen moron was good building materials.''
''Borson,'' Surtr rumbles in response, a grin shining through his jungle of a beard. ''I did not know you were masochistic, or suicidal. Coming here?''
''Took the words right out of my mouth-as I''m sure nobody has ever told you,'' Odin smiles back. ''Do you think yourself my better?''
''I think you are no longer fated to die in the wolf''s jaws. There is no destiny anymore, One-Eye!''
The giants lunges, and Odin lets him swing, raising Gungnir like a quarterstaff to block.
It does not pierce the spear, as Surtr realises, despite the shockwaves and flames unleashed by the blow turning Yggdrasil, all the words on its roots, trunk and branches and the stars in its leaves to nothing.
Smile widening, Odin speaks the name of time backwards, and all is restored. Enforced by the Allfather''s will, this will be unremembered by any walking or climbing the world ash. No one, but Surtr, for Odin intends to anger the giant, just as his nonsensical slaughter has angered him.
''No!'' Surtr growls, pouring his will into his blade, stoking the flames until they are hotter than all the stars in the mundane universe put together. ''You cannot bring it back! I have burned it!''
''I think you''ll notice...I just have.'' Odin pushes the blade aside with one gauntleted hand, sending Surtr sprawling across his blazing domain. ''Why so surprised, giant? You burn the tree to nothing, yes-in Ragnarok. But I have been told recently that...there is no destiny.''
Surtr roars in rage, but only briefly, before Odin closes the distance, throttling him with one hand. ''Be silent! I have lost face before the other pantheons twice-once when Thor lost his temper, once when I humbled myself by allowing the taskforces free reign to walk my Realms. And you strike them down because...what? It''s the first time you feel unburdened? You have been polishing your sword so long it has become tedious, and you want to draw attention to yourself?''
Surtr cannot answer with the Allfather''s hand crushing his throat. Odin does not want him to. Glancing at the burned corpses and Heracles'' remains, everything is clear. He will send the former to their Lord, preachy hypocritical bastard that he is, and the latter to his perverse lout of a father. It would not do to deprive Olympus of another incestuous fool.
Surtr is far denser than any natural material on Earth, and heavier than any star. This does not stop Odin from throwing him out of Muspellheim, up Yggdrasil''s trunk, past its branches and leaves, and past the eagle who now has no rival. Veorfolnir startles between his living perch''s eyes as the Allfather and his foe pass by, far faster than light. Odin has outpaced Surtr''s flight, floating on nothing above Yggdrasil''s tip to catch Surtr as he reaches the apex of the throw. One of Odin''s arms is wrapped tight around the giant''s neck, the difference in size rendered meaningless by his powers, and the other around Surtr''s wrist, holding his arm extended and his power shackled so that he cannot use his sword.
''Do you think Frey will be jealous?'' Odin growls, teeth bared in a wolfish grin. "You even burned down the tree...he''ll feel like I''m stealing his role!"
With a hateful roar and a burst of strength that shatters his body, Surtr frees himself, spinning to face Odin and bringing his sword down on the Allfather''s head. Odin raises Gungnir, its tip clashing with the sword''s flaming edge, and shattering it, the void shrieking as it closes for Surtr''s grimacing face. It pierces his flesh and skull and brain, bursting out of the back of his head, but Odin is not unmarked. A shard, still flaming, leaps at his eye, burying itself deep within it.
Even as it burns, hotter than anything in the universe, Odin smiles, gripped by a rage fiercer than any since...ha. He cannot remember. He will have to ask Munin.
''You will die, Borson!'' Surtr screams with the last of his strength as he falls down into Ginnungagap, steaming blood forming a curtain around and above him. ''And when you choke on your ashen tears, you will wish you have died like your bitch of a son!''
Odin smirks, until the end of the taunt. With a thought command, his ravens blur over Yggdrasil. He not know how Surtr knew about Thor''s fate-perhaps the Black God shared a plan with him, and he was merely expecting it-, but by the time Hugin croaks sadly in his ear, Thor is dead. Tyr, too, a braver warrior than he had ever had a right to ask for. And...his blood brother''s little monsters, as well.
''No fate, indeed,'' Odin snarls, his godly sight searching Ginnungagap without the need for eyes. He is not sure if he could take the Black God-it has killed Fenrir, whether by surprise or fairly. Could Odin have done the same? Perhaps. He could have pushed himself far past his limits with his runes, but, during Ragnarok, fate would have done the same to the wolf, so he would still die.
But fate...is no more.
''I will not be the one choking on ashen tears,'' the Allfather muses to himself, a wisp of a smile twisting the corner of his scarred lips. He has found what he was looking for, far past his Realms. It is unsure and formless, without its anchor. Odin does not give that back to it-he does not want to be an accomplice to whatever it may do once returned-but he helps. Just a small flicker of runic light, a beacon, a lure, pointing towards the Black God who crippled it.
An old monster looks across endless darkness, and smiles. And, though it has no face, Nacht smiles back, and promises pain and horror, as it always has.
***
''Grandfather! Where are...'' It is Magni who meets him as he strides back into Asgard, after this phase of the war (against what, Odin wonders? Perhaps chaos itself) ends, and a false peace descends. His grandson trails off at his eyeless face, but his expression, he knows, hurts far more.
As Modi and Vidar gather around him, and so many citizens watch from their windows and doorframes, Odin can only think how Frigg will take the news. Sif, he knows, will be...
No matter. He has always been able to harden his heart.
''Split them however you wish,'' Odin says hollowly, putting Thor''s panoply in Magni''s hands and striding past him as Vidar calls for him to return, and Magni and Modi throw their heads back and wail-roar? He is tired, so tired...he cannot tell anymore-in grief and disbelief. Grasping his ravens in both hands, Odin tightens his grip, barks the harsh spell he has put together over the return trip, and snaps their necks.
Knowledge flows into his mind, no longer filtered and limited by the bond between master and familiars. Already, he knows the whereabouts of his sons'' lingering souls, and how to make them coherent, so that their shades may return, at least in Asgard.
Fate is gone. The old ends are no more. And, Odin swears as his raven''s eyes fill his sockets, and their insight and memories fill his mind, they will never be caught blind again.
Empty Tomb, Prologue
''Why not him?'' I had suggested, flicking my knife at the black one.
As always, Hogge had skulked deeper into the shadows of his pen, eyes flashing yellow above gleaming tusks. His piggish face had somehow seemed to be grinning mockingly.
"Look at me, how scared I''m pretending to be."
Pops had shaken his head. ''There are others, David.''
''That one is unnatural. Hell, he''s been around since my childhood. What the hell kind of pig lives that long? Besides the magical ones you insist he''s not.''
''I do that because Hogge is not a magical pig.''
I had sighed. One day, we were going to address the swine in the yard.
But, clearly, not today. Tempted as I was to just look at him with Mimir''s sight, and see whatever pops was being oblique about.
Maybe I''d finally find out my father''s dark secret. All weirdos needed a good parent with a dark secret, right? The town librarian had said so while we were discussing novels, and dammit, she might have been a crazy cat lady(as in, a werecat who believed she was human), but she was trustworthy.
No mud touched pops'' faintly-glowing rubbers boots as he paced through the muck, orange flames streaming from his open palm and turning the slaughtered pig''s skin a rich brown. Mihai had offered to do it himself, but pops had declined, claiming the aetherically-sensitive would taste his magic''s residue while we were eating, and faithcraft was faster than a burner. The old man wore a pair of thick grey pants-a gift from a retired friend, who''d worked at the car factory in Mioveni-and a black jacket he didn''t need to protect him from the cold. On the back, a golden image of Christ wept red tears, smiling plaintively with his arms outstretched. "DO NOT" was written above the Redeemer, and "CROSS ME AGAIN" beneath.
A tasteless joke, in my opinion. But then, pops often received dubious ''gifts'' from his parishioners who wanted to see if they could rattle old Father Silva, or shake his faith. He kept them to prove they did not.
I leaned against the wall next to the cellar door, one hand toying with my new cross. Pops had forged it after Chernobog had turned the last one to dust during the Headhunt. In truth, I wasn''t wearing it, because it would have made me sink through the concrete. Instead, I was shaping the air around it, creating a supernaturally-strong current, that, while small, could still keep it floating a few millimetres above my skin, preventing the thousand-ton cross from cratering the ground. The weight had been a suggestion of Rivka Peretz during a particularly frustrating sparring session. The ghoul had kept coming at me, however many times I''d reduced her to stray atoms, after running out of curses and taunts, we''d started talking.
''God,'' I had sighed, holding her above the ring in a sphere of spinning air. ''I wish I had something to just...pin down angry, unstoppable midgets like you with.''
''Watch the low blows, Silva!'' Rivka had said, before performing a gesture that I was sure wasn''t encouraged by the Tanakh, or even common manners. ''Why don''t you just ask your daddy to make you another eyesore paperweight, if you want to pin me down so much?''
A comment I hadn''t replied to, not even jokingly. I had a girlfriend now, for the first time in over a decade.
And so, the second cross. Still made of iron and silver, though I wasn''t sure if pops had simply made a shitton of the materials and compressed it, or just made the cross heavy despite it not physically massing much. It also had bladed edges, just like the first one.
Mia squatted next to me, or maybe she was kneeling. With zmeu legs jointing backwards, they were pretty much the same thing. Even like this, her head was still above my waist, but I''d gotten used to the height difference, while she was using the height difference.
''Sure you don''t want me to lend a breath, Costi?'' my girlfriend asked, arms folded across her thighs as her tails fiddled with the strings on her red hoodie.
''Thank you, my dear,'' Pops waved her off. ''But your flame''s power would linger on the meat, just like Mihai''s magic. It''s...almost done, anyway...''
Mia had grown close enough to my father since the beginning of our relationship that she refrained from cracking a joke about the meat, just smiling. She knew he found her humour "quite energetic", but not really his type. In turn, she held her tongue around him, and opened up around me.
She didn''t refrain from jokes, either.
When pops was done, Andrei approached the pig, boots making the tarp it was on creak. The were was wearing a thick black long coat over a dark green shirt and blue pants; the coat was a holdover from his Securist days, proof against silver blades and so heavy it would have broken a human''s spine. His calloused hands became the paws of his beast form, fur running up to his elbows and filling his sleeves. He drew a claw the size of my index finger across the pig''s back, opening it up like an envelope. Then, he wisely jumped back, clearing over a dozen metres and landing in the back of the garden, and I joined him an instant later. Petru and Pavel were tied to one of the apple trees, just a few metres away from him, and both dogs growled as he touched down. Being moved from their usual places was usually great, especially when pops took their leashes off, but the presence of strangers annoyed them.
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Andrei, like my other friends, came by when pops and I were away, to feed the dogs, the "neighbours'' cats" that seemed to live with pops, and water the plants. This didn''t stop the dogs from barking their lungs out whenever they smelled the werebear. Maybe they just sensed the animal in him, and couldn''t stand it. He loved them, and, since most of his work consisted of working as security for bored rich people or tearing up people in the supernatural fighting circuit, sometimes along Lucian, he had a lot of free time. So, he had spent a lot of time with the dogs. They just didn''t like him.
Mia stood up, dusting off her tights as Lucian and his brothers dropped out off the sky, making us jump into the air. Both Lucas and Aaron flipped before landing, shrinking in size until they were hardly bigger than their younger brother. We didn''t really have enough space for Aaron, so...
''I wanted to help with the guts.'' Andrei wasn''t pouting. He just sounded like it.
''Don''t woooory,'' Mihai smirked, slouching against the fence. ''If you want to gut a pig so much, just get in trouble with a cop.''
''Ha, ha,'' Bianca smiled sarcastically, then quickly covered it with one hand in mock-embarrassment.
''That was pretty bad, man,'' Alex said quietly, rubbing his hands together out of reflex. He hadn''t felt anything since his death, but he still acted human, even shaping his ectoplasm into winter clothes. In fact, the ghost''s bluish-white face was barely visible-only his eyes were, really-under his thick "woolen" hat and scarf.
''Agreed,'' Andrei replied. ''Even by my standards. And I love making bad jokes-just look at David.''
''Hey!'' I spread my arms in disbelief.
''Do accidental jokes count?'' Alex adjusted his scarf, sounding thoughtful.
''I''m a rapper, I swear,'' I turned away dramatically, fist clenched. ''Catching strays for no reason...''
''What''d your name be, Lil'' Moody?'' Bianca raised her eyebrows, giggling.
''Stick around until the evening, and maybe you''ll find out. Mia and I are going caroling.'' Pops couldn''t come. He was looking for a new verger, wanting the church to be fully-staffed until Christmas, for reasons he hadn''t shared. Over the decades, pops had sometimes had helped, but they either died or quit, and he could handle almost all duties himself, between his enthusiasm and faithcraft.
''Ah...'' the iela twirled a blonde curl around her index finger, smiling sheepishly. ''Can''t. I''m singing at several senior centres in Bucharest tonight. Next week, too...well, until after New Year''s Eve, really.''
''If you have to sing for old people, you''d rather be paid, eh?'' I asked, nodding sagely. Understandable, understandable.
''Gotta stay on my grind.'' She flexed a slim arm that could have flattened a tank, grinning.
''And she''s not singing for them!'' Lucian called out to us, turning to look over his shoulder, mouth and moustache red and dripping. ''She''s singing at them. Bia only sings for me.''
Well, it was really nice that their tempers had aligned enough for them to be together for the holidays.
''He hasn''t looked like that since my last period,'' the iela whispered theatrically, leaning towards me.
''Oi, don''t eat while you''re working, you arse!'' Andrei yelled. ''If you can''t be serious, get over here and I''ll take your place.''
''Let me show you where to shove that suggestion-'' Lucas smacked his brother upside the head before he could demonstrate.
''Sooo...'' Mihai stuck his hands into the pockets of his green tracksuit. ''Caroling? I''d come too, but the girls are coming back tonight from Adi''s mom, and I wanna greet them.''
''Making sure your mother-in-law hasn''t opened their eyes about you?'' Alex rasped, eyes glinting.
''What''s that supposed to mean, Gasper the Unfriendly Ghost?''
''Hey,'' Bianca turned to me. ''Heard there''ll be a lots of bears and goats this year.''
''Bah! Those are for young men. Besides, only the two of them?'' Andrei said, waving a hand dismissively.
''Oh, I don''t know,'' I said, looking him up and down. ''If you come with us, I think we''ll be able to go with the bear...''
''Hilarious.'' Mr. "I love bad jokes" bared teeth that had become fangs in dry amusement. ''You need a costume for that, smartarse.''
''But if you go hybrid, you''ll be so ugly people will be convinced you''re costumed!'' I insisted. ''I know it''s unusual, but bear with me...''
We bantered for a bit more, as the morning sun rose higher, and Mia and the zmeu brothers finished their agreed-upon part, the former gathering the guts and jerking her head at Bianca for the iela to come help clean them.
The rest of the day was so blissfully normal, I should have known something bad was coming. After the pig''s alms, the zmei brothers hung around a bit more, to help make the sausages (Aaron insisted it helped with his blood pressure, which I think was a first time for pork), then left for their country. Their parents had reunited for the first time in decades-not for Christmas, as their father didn''t celebrate it, and their mother didn''t understand most aspects of our reality, but through sheer coincidence-and, going by their excited apprehension, they really wanted to capitalise on this.
This was the beginning of what should have been a time of joy and charity.
Let me tell you, instead, of the Fright Before Christmas.
Empty Tomb, Chapter 1
''Still say we''ve got it worse than you, teach.'' Eric grinned, all fangs, leaning back on the bench and running a hand through his mop of brown hair. He''d never stopped calling me "teach", even after graduation.
Bogdan nodded sagely in agreement, short raven curls swaying. ''Yeah. Can you imagine being eternally thirsty?''
''Moron.'' Eric ripped off an index finger to flick at his friend''s forehead, sharp green eyes narrowed. ''Why would he have to imagine something he lives with?''
Bogdan turned to me, a doubtfu; look in his blue eyes as he put a hand on my shoulder. He tilted his head this and that way, humming, before coming to the wrong conclusion. ''Are you always thirsty, David?''
Eric groaned. ''Come here before you infect him with something.''
Shrugging, Bogdan rose from the bench we''d been sharing and flitted to sit down next to his friend and partner. ''I meant his girlfriend, you little savant you.''
''Oh, yeah!'' Bogdan grinned toothily, eyes brightening. ''Mia''s pretty thirsty. I just thought you meant literal thirst.''
''Well, maybe I did,'' Eric smirked at me, rubbing his chin with one hand, the index finger healed. ''She still thirsty, boss?''
''Oh, definitely. Just glad she''s not a vamp, otherwise she''d be sucking me dry twice over,'' I replied.
''Ah, well, we can''t all be looking for blood,'' Bogdan replied, before leaning closer to Eric. ''Probably has saltier tastes,'' he mouthed.
''I bet,'' Eric said, his smirk slightly annoyed. ''Before you derailed me, though, I wanted to clarify what I meant. I didn''t say vamps have it worse than strigoi-''
''I don''t know, man...'' I said in my best philosopher voice. ''Vampires suck.''
For my troubles, I was caught in a shower of sharp words and sharper gestures.
''I meant,'' Eric said finally. ''That us two have it worse than you when it comes to our jobs.''
''Oh?'' I said curiously, taking in our surroundings as he gathered his words. We were in the Haunts, Bucharest''s undead quarter. Specifically, the Belfry, the area with the highest vamp concentration, where the inhabitants had thick blinds over every window and pooled their weather manipulation to keep everything under permanent dark clouds.
There were lots of blood banks, too. Artificial blood was in far higher demand from vampires than normal people, even though, at thirty-two million, vamps represented barely more than a thousandth of the world''s population. But then, normal people didn''t chug blood like water.
I kind of agreed with him. I loved what I did. Liked my job, too.
''Well,'' Eric leaned forward, fingers steepled. The one he''d severed had been crushed in his grip and the remains placed in a bag that would be obliterated. Such things were never left lying around. ''I meant the uniforms, mostly...'' He gestured at his dark blue pants, yellow shirt and red tie. The tricolor. ''ARC dresses you up like a chessboard, yes, but black goes with everything, especially white. We look like someone sneezed, had a nosebleed, then dipped the tissue into ink.''
''The fuck, dude?'' Bogdan punched him in the shoulder, shooting Eric an incredulous look. ''Keep that nasty shit to yourself. I don''t wanna hear comparisons like that before drinking.''
''Well, the Supernatural Service is fairly new,'' I said placatingly. ''I''m sure your superiors just want to show they have the country''s best interests at heart, hence why the colour scheme is a little...on the nose.''
''On the nose,'' Eric repeated, a deadpan expression on his face. ''This is not on the nose, David. It''s a brick between the eyes. Not even Breakout from the States dresses as her flag, patriot that she is.''
''Actually,'' Bogdan said in a snooty voice. ''She wears a balaclava with the stars and stripes, and used to wear a sash like that, too.''
''Oh?'' Eric glanced at him curiously. ''And why are you so well-informed about FREAKSHOW''s favourite wrecking ball? Studying the opposition, are you?''
''Wake up, man. Freedomland ain''t been "the opposition" for decades.''
''Talk like this could have you taken away, comrade! Don''t make me send you to the Canal!''
''The one I dug through your mom, or...?''
I smiled as they bantered, happy they had finally found something to fill their unlives with, something they had chosen. Romania was a little better for every supernatural who pledged their powers for the people, or the country, or even money.
Hell. Just not being a supernatural criminal was nice.
None of us were off-duty-in fact, all of us were patrolling, looking for suspicious supernatural activity in case anyone was using the holidays as cover or to draw attention away from themselves. I didn''t remain with them for much longer, though, as I was soon recalled to Omu base.
***
Since the Cold Madness and the Headhunt, ARC and its national counterparts had grown sick of being caught unawares. As such, a regime of training against every type of conceivable opponent, as well as some inconceivable ones, had been established.
In ARC''s case, this meant agents from different divisions were pitted against each other, as well as whatever construct the people from Salem could cook up. The Air Force even lent us some-doubtlessly outdated-drones to train against, to hunt or be hunted down by. The spherical machines were barely bigger than a football, but tough enough I broke my hands hitting them, fast enough to fly circles around lightning bolts, and able to raze Romania in seconds with their lasers, plasma bolts, railguns or missiles.
The drones, like many forms of power armour, were powered by a network micro-wormholes leading to the sun and other stars, the energy being funneled through so that the drones would never run out of power, or sunlight to strip vampires of their esoteric abilities with.
I had just beaten a werelynx named Radu, who had come from the Luna division base over in Bra?ov, while Rivka Peretz had gone in his place, to cross claws with our were colleagues. Incensed at her perceived uselessness during the Headhunt (like she could have done anything to Thor!), and at how easily I''d incapacitated her during the spar before I''d gotten my new cross, the ghoul had taken to eating thousands of times her weight in lab grown meat, her power growing to the point where her movements became a blur to my eyes when we fought, and she could tear through me as easily as the Unscarred had done on Mars, years ago.
She was not as strong as the albino currently was, but, between her power and the ferocity that only grew even as her hunger was sated, I doubted it would be much consolation to the weres.
While Aya Reem and Romania''s Director Gelu Malea discussed who would take over as Romania''s senior agent after Marc''s...after Flavius Marcus had gone missing in action(they still spoke as if Marc was somewhere out there, merely lost), an experienced Crypt agent had been brought from Spain as a temporary replacement.
We just...couldn''t tell what he was experienced with.
As I dispersed the air sphere around Radu, the werelynx fell the thirty metres to the ring with his legs coiled, landing on his paws easily.
''Nice move, Silva,'' he growled as he turned human, fanged smile becoming merely toothy. Unlike most weres, who preferred to fight in their hybrid forms, gaining power and sharper senses while retaining their voices, Radu fought as a lynx, claiming anything you wanted to say during a spar, you could express through actions. He still went hybrid on missions, as far as I knew, but, in training, he chose to mangle people on all fours.
''But I''m not a hamster,'' he continued, his ruddy face screwing up in distaste. ''If you put me into a ball again, I''ll tear out your balls and swap them with your eyes.''
Pussy! My strigoi side snickered in my mind. It had developed a sort of pseudo-sapience since the Headhunt. Less of a separate personality and more of a really loud, really coarse subconscious, it had been awakened by the tiny quantities of lifeforce I had consumed from dying animals and plants. A strigoi eventually began talking to their instincts like this, if they consumed enough lifeforce, but...after the bullshit Chernobog had pulled in my body, I wasn''t keen on having someone else on my head, even if it was still "me".
We should tear out that rough little tongue of his, human, it whispered, a smile in its false voice. And shove it down his throat. Do it again and again and again as he heals, until he bloats and falls apart! Then, after he stops being a pile of gore, we will do it again, with a different body part~.
Its suggestions didn''t help. Especially since I knew, deep down, that it only reflected my darkest desires.
It got real interesting when I was with Mia.
''Alright, me lads!'' Marc''s replacement clapped twice as he jumped down between us from the bleachers. My ghost colleagues, as well as a few necromancers and the ogre corpses they animated, looked down at us with curiosity from one side. On the other were Radu''s colleagues from Luna, as well as a balaur from Drake. Thundertail, as he insisted we call him, had haggled with all of us over "old things" for his hoard, because he "knew from experience" that dead people gathered knickknacks around them.
I had felt attacked. I was dead, not retired.
Now, the balaur glanced at us with mild amusement, his electric-yellow body, larger than most passenger planes, sprawled across several tiers of bleachers, muzzle propped in one claw. Thundertail was just as strong, fast and tough as me, healed as fast without any holy weakness, and his lightning breath could and had vapourised me.
When balaurs, and dragons in general, were killed, it was because their killers were favoured by gods or fate, or just had absolutely monstrous weapons.
''Radu, go clean yourself up. You can even use the showers, if you want,'' Diego Cortez said, his grin just as sharp as the werelynx''s, who packed more insults in that smile than I could in most sentences. Nevertheless, Radu nodded in agreement, as his body was covered in blood and guts, his still steaming, mine as cold as ever, from when we''d torn each other apart.
The Spanish vampire hummed to himself, spinning on one foot to look at me with blood-red eyes.
Diego (I was sure his last name was just as fake as his claims of having sailed to America with the Conquistadors; the Shattering might have been an acausal headache, but this guy didn''t act like he was centuries old, even if he dressed like he was) had skin as white as his poofy-sleeved shirt, which was tight across the torso, opening to show a chest covered in wiry black hair. Over it, he wore a black and white, unbuttoned ARC vest. He also wore black leather pants, waist encircled by a brown leather belt with a gold buckle. High-heeled, shiny black shoes-he only came up to my chest, even with the added centimetres- and a wide-brimmed black hat with peacock feathers in every colour of the rainbow completed the flamboyant ensemble.
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''Now!'' He pointed at me, dramatically turning his face to look away, his other hand on his hip. ''There is bad blood staining the Crypt''s floors. My kind are often called leeches, and, ah, Dios! What a poetic comparison! For the noble leech drains away all is foul and corrupt, leaving the body healthy. Loric!''
I almost gawked at him, but opted to instead turn and look as the wall of the training room shifted to allow in the strigoi I had never wanted to see again.
Szabo looked just as fat and jolly as the last time I had seen him, though there was a faint annoyance in his gleaming eyes, in the lines of his face. He had loathed being restricted to patrols through Hungary alone, I imagined...
But the old bastard had somehow managed to get a new set of ''leathers''.
''Szabo?'' I began by way of greeting, crossing my arms. ''Please tell me you got those from corpses, at least.''
The older strigoi giggled. ''Why, David...I only handle dead meat when touching myself~''
My strigoi side laughed approvingly in my mind. Great, now I''d have two groady bastards living rent-free in my brain.
''Why is he here?'' I asked Diego, not taking my eyes off Szabo, or his broad smile. He was faster than I could see, but it was the thought than counted.
The vamp clicked his tongue. ''David, David, do you listen not?! To clear the air between you! I know you and Loric have your differences, but that is no excuse for dissent among the ranks. Why, I remember once, when my men mutinied against me...it was the summer of sixty-three, that is, seventeen sixty-three, and the grog had run as low as their patience...''
Szabo listened and nodded at the appropriate moments, still smiling, to my bafflement, but I didn''t miss the tension in his stance whenever Diego moved. Was he...was he scared of this guy?
''As such!'' the vamp exclaimed after finishing his anecdote. ''Loric will explain why he attacked you, David, and you will explain your disapproval of him. You can do it before, as, or after you spar.''
''That''s it?'' I asked. ''We shake hands then part as friends?''
''You can kiss too,'' Diego wiggled slim, black eyebrows. ''But remember: do not become ?too friendly. We are, after all, professionals. Besides, I''m sure David''s spitfire of a darling would get mighty jealous, and we wouldn''t want that, would we?''
Before I could ask when or why he had learned about my relationship with Mia, Diego was gone, and Szabo was ripping me apart. Both events had happened faster than I could see.
***
ARC''s training rooms can simulate virtually any environment. Whether through magic, technology, or both, they could create spaces as large as a city, planet or universe, which were still contained in the room.
For today''s exercise, Omu base''s training room used wards crafted by mages specialised in bending space, creating a copy of the universe equal in size to the original, but simultaneously small enough to fit in the room, which was only the size of a few football stadiums. The objects in the replica were made of hardlight, each just as durable as the real thing.
Something I could attest to as Szabo smashed my face against the ground, breaking both it and Germany into tiny chunks. The strigoi threw me away, disinterested, and I split the Atlantic with my passing, landing to rip through the States, breaking them in half. My body healed just as fast as it was damaged, unlike the fake Earth, but I was still losing. Badly.
Szabo was on me before I could move, stomping through my neck to turn the southern USA into dust. With a pitying look, he kicked me away, and I vapourised several mountains with my passing, each impact bruising my back, managing to stop myself in midair somewhere at the border with Canada.
Szabo was floating in front of me instantly, shaking his head, and I flew away, until he was just a dot on the horizon, whipping the weather into a frenzy with my will. To distract him, I created a sphere of ink-black storm clouds around him, bombarding the strigoi with hailstones that would have crushed cars and rain that would have flayed humans alive. A snap of his fingers dispersed the clouds, and I summoned lightning, looking to cover him in layers and layers of bolts, hoping to blind him.
When the bolts, well over twelve hundred times faster than sound, were milimetres from his skin, he disappeared, only to reappear kilometres away, behind me.
So damn fa-
''I am sorry, David,'' he said, one fist smashing through my chest to grip my spine. ''Not for neglecting to explain myself to you. You should have seen through Chernobog''s ploy, no matter what he looked like-''
''Then why are you sorry?'' I snarled. Every microsecond, I punched the strigoi several times, each strike packing enough power to vapourise the mountain golem I had merely pulverised in Siberia. My fists broke on his nose and eyes-the softest parts of his face, fucking dammit-leaving him unharmed, if filthy. Szabo flicked my chest, to get my attention, turning me into red steam.
''Why are you sorry?'' I repeated when I healed, trying to fruitlessly harm him once more. ''For hurting Mia?!''
''Who?'' his brow furrowed in confusion, and I roared, summoning a storm fiercer than any that had ever ravaged America, making thousands of lightning bolts tear through the sky every microsecond, and drawing them all into my hands, until I was sure that...that...
Baring my fangs, shaping the lightning into a crude blade, I raised it overhead, and Szabo shook his head at my approach, but made no move to dodge.
I split him in half from exposed brain to crotch, and he healed almost as fast as I cut through him, before flicking me into steam once more.
Szabo sighed as I healed once more, rubbing his forehead. ''I am sorry you make yourself so weak, David.''
''The fuck are you saying?''
''Let me tell you...three things.'' Szabo held up three scarred, calloused fingers, then was gone from my sight, as was everything else.
By the time my eyes healed, I was in high orbit, looking down at a world with no continents.
''One: in the time it would take a human''s heart to beat once, I dragged you around the planet seven times, shattering the continents with your body,'' Szabo whispered, suddenly behind me. Before I could turn, his hand ripped through my skull, squeezing my brain, and throwing me at and through the moon.
My constantly-regenerating body carved a tunnel that would have swallowed Germany from one side of the moon to the other as it smashed through countless tons of rock. Szabo was there when I flew out of the ruin, kicking me from the moon through Mars, ripping up an area the size of Europe, and into Jupiter''s Great Red Spot. I tried to gather my bearings until he reached me, but he harnessed a fraction of the great storm that was Jupiter to keep me in place, trapped in a hurricane of orange clouds and yellow lightning, moved so fast by his will I was turned to charred pieces several times.
''Two: you are slow. You do not move quickly, either,'' Szabo said after he flew to me, gripping my throat and forcing me to look at him.
''And three...you fight like the weakling strigoi you were, not whatever impossible freak you became during the Headhunt. What will it take to motivate you, David?''
''I don''t know how to use Mimir''s power,'' I protested, angry at myself for feeling the need to justify myself to Szabo, for losing to him, for-
''No,'' he said firmly. ''It is my fault, I am sure. Perhaps you need someone else to motivate you~?''
Szabo giggled as his skin turned ebony, features fading while antlers began to grow from his...his...
''Go to hell,'' I growled hoarsely, striking him with all my strength, turning my limbs to paste, but sending the grotesque son of a bitch out of sight.
''Oh, David...'' a rich, deep voice rumbled as black arms wrapped around me from behind. ''Did you think you could ever escape me?''
I roared, thrashing in Szabo''s grip as he laughed, unable to dislodge him. Why...w-why...
Why the fuck was his touch burning me!?
Finally, his grip loosened, and I kicked the Chernobog-lookalike deep into Jupiter''s clouds and out of my sight.
I w-was hallucinating, clearly. C-Could strigoi do that? I had...h-ha...I had imagined that he was burning me, like a god would.
H-How fucking scared could I get?
''That was better!'' Szabo''s normal voice rang out, and I broke my spine with how fast I turned to glare at him. The fucking bastard was smiling, like he hadn''t just...just...how fucking ?dare he?
''But not good enough...'' Szabo trailed off, looking at me, nonplussed, as I broke my body trying to leave one, one fucking mark on him. ''David? What did you do while I was finding my way back?''
''W-What?'' I gasped, voice breaking, eyes darting wildly from his face to his head. He was...he was Szabo. Not...
''Your chest...how did you burn yourself like that? And why aren''t you healing?''
¡fuck him. Damn him and his fucking, twisted joke. I didn''t know how he was doing this to me, but I lost it.
A sound like a blade slashing through air, on an unimaginably greater scale, brought me back to my senses, and I blinked newly-healed eyes to see Diego floating between us, his sharp features set in a thunderous grimace. In one hand, he held a one-edged sword dripping with ruby blood that didn''t dry or run out, its gilded scabbard hanging on one hip. His intervention had reduced both Szabo and I to scattered particles, separating us.
And turning Jupiter into a shapeless cloud, spanning the distance between Saturn and Mars.
''End simulation,'' the vampire said tersely, his goateed chin trembling, one hand clenched tight on the sword. A small corner of my mind distantly wondered how much blood he had drank to become so powerful. He was certainly the strongest vamp I knew of, even stronger than that blue whale that had destroyed Australia, barring a few unsettling rumours from South America.
''No!'' I screamed, and Diego turned his piercing stare on me. ''I will kill him! The bastard fucking burned me! I don''t know how, but-''
''THAT''S THE BLOODY PROBLEM, SILVA!'' Diego barked, silencing me. ''What just happened-and we''re not sure what it was-should not have been possible. We must look for glitches in the simulator, or intruders, or-''
The simulation ended, but not with the created space fading into nothing. Instead, it twitched and writhed like a dying man, before disappearing in a blinding flash of colourless light.
Diego, Szabo and the other agents were on their feet, back to back, when my sight recovered, Thundertail encircling us, wings raised and lightning crackling in his yawning maw.
Every light in the room and beyond was shattered, every device in pieces, or rusting.
And, through the darkness, fey laughter rang out to fill our ears, carried by wind that had not been there before.
Interlude: Glimpses
Mihai Codrea returns home by teleportation. It''s a fairly nice apartment in the Spheres, Bucharest''s mage quarter. Everyone wil give you a different answer if you ask for the name''s origin and meaning, which is only fitting, when magic is involved.
The wards, which would normally prevent such an esoteric entrance, recognise their creator and let him in. So far, so good.
Then, Mihai realises he is alone.
This is not what unsettles him. He expected to outpace the girls. What is unsettling is the fact that all the lights in the house, which should have turned on at his arrival, are out: the lightbulbs broken, the magelights-spheres of sunlight he crafted in case of a blackout, which he is beginning to think this isn''t-snuffed out.
Then, someone almost kills him.
Mihai''s reflexes are boosted by his mana, a necessity in the presence of his rowdy friends, with the supernatural bodies they take for granted. Even so, the blade leaves a shallow, thin mark on his throat as he teleports away, cursing.
The line doesn''t heal. This is when he gets scared.
Mihai puts his body, mind and soul in a timeloop set to rewind him to perfect health, however disastrous his death. This is paired with an automatic teleportation spell, set to place him a far distance away from the cause of his latest death.
Both of these things are, again, a necessity when around his friends. None of them has killed him, not even accidentally...so far. This doesn''t mean it won''t happen. He is only human, which means he is frail and paranoid.
Mihai gathers power as he sees his attacker, tall and lean and barely visible under a shroud of shadows. It is smirking, white teeth gleaming in darkness. His eyes dart to the knife in its hands, a dull, almost blunt-looking thing. But he feels the absence within the blade, not just lack of mana, but its opposite.
Antimagic.
Mihai proudly considers himself too boring to have enemies, so he''s not sure why grinner over there is trying to give him a new mouth on his throat, but the enthusiasm is neither appreciated nor wanted.
Mihai tries to stop it from advancing, but it walks through spatial distortions that should have flattened it into nothing, and spots of twisted time that should have made it never exist. It deflects his projectiles with its knife, and leaps when he tries to bend the living room''s floor around its feet.
Then, when it is in midair, Mihai creates a portal in front of it, then another above near the ceiling. It is followed by a third on the floor. Mihai dispels the first after the wannabe assassin blurs through it, leaving it falling from the second and into the third, over and over. Mihai blasts, not its knife, but the wrist of the hand holding it, sending the weapon flying out of its grip and reach.
Still, he feels it reach out with its will, trying to take control of his portals. With a scoff, Mihai shuts down its attempt.
He''s had enough of people taking his things since his arsehole parents removed every ''distraction'' that could prevent him from reaching ''true prowess in every domain''. The times they locked him in the cellar, with no light and stale air, were pretty memorable too, if not exactly nice.
Mihai doesn''t know this fucker, but, if his parents are the first people it has made him think of, he doubts he''s going to like it-
A thin scream, that quickly becomes a gurgle, fills his ears. His heart almost sinks as he imagines his...no. It wasn''t his wife''s voice, nor one of his daughters''. Just...
"Just" a neighbour whose name he''s never managed to remember, despite seeing her every day.
Before dashing out of his home to help, Mihai takes a good luck at the would-be killer, and smiles coldly.
People like it always need some iron in their blood. He might as well give it a present, before going to meet its friends.
Christmas is coming, after all, he thinks as he stabs the Unseelie through the heart with a created iron knife, walking ''on'' the floor portal like it is solid, before dispelling it and letting the Fae''s corpse fall.
Mihai does not think about this now, but he has just killed a thinking being for the first time in his life.
***
Andrei''s current employer is a young rich girl, with a foreign-sounding name. Miranda...something. Her parents were landscaping mages, and left her a fortune when they died. She has all the vices he expects, given her age and wealth. No worse or stranger than any of the gold-digging ''friends'' she clubs with.
It''s supposed to be a nice, boring bodyguard job, so, of course, it goes wrong. ''Predictable'' things always go wrong. Like when he was assured someone would take him from the orphanage. Or when they told him the bear attack had left no wounds because he had imagined it.
(The were turned him before it began tearing him apart, so he could heal and survive everything it did to him.)
Or, why not, when he was given a choice between tirelessly working at the Canal and raising monuments, or a silver blade through the neck. It took him some time, and killing several dissenting coworkers, before the Party realised he''d do better as an attack dog rather than a mule.
Those were the years, he thinks drily, remembering all the dead protesters, the children taken away for stealing food, the soldiers and politicians who were too successful and popular, who stood out.
But it was kill or be killed, really. He got to disappear some real monsters too, some of whom he worked alongside in the Security, until his little mishap with Simona got him a black mark. Not because anyone had given a damn about a teenage mother dying in childbirth, or even that he''d slept with a minor without realising, like a moron, but because they had thought he couldn''t control himself.
Maybe they''d been right. It had been a stupid, stupid storm of pent-up lust, and a truly bizarre attempt to get at his father Misha by sleeping with a willing woman, proving he wouldn''t become a rapist like him.
It seems every son in their family, Andrei thinks, smiling to himself as he wonders what David is doing, is better than his father.
After the regime change(the people got sick of it, as in, rich foreigners wanted in, and a ravaged, hungry, revolutionary population, would provide good workers and buyers. Almost like the forties over again...)he was smart enough to keep his head down, so they let him fade into obscurity.
Security in obscurity is a phrase that will never cease making him laugh his head off...
Andrei tenses, glaring in concentration as his senses try to find what his instinct tells them is there. It takes him an instant, but he jumps away from the sliver-covered fist that comes out of nowhere, rolling with the blow so it just breaks his nose.
This will never heal, and dammit, it''s not like he doesn''t already look like shit, as several people told him in his childhood. Back then, it didn''t mean anything as harmless as being ugly. It had more to do with being a "crow without a murder", as some charmingly put it.
The Fae grins at him between raised hands covered in silver gauntlets, and he tries to remember when and how he''s drawn the enmity of the elves off the shelves. He comes up blank, instead focusing on dodging jabs half a dozen times the speed of sound. Then, someone hits him from behind-not with silver, it barely hurts-, sending him flying through the club''s ceiling, pulverising a hole in it, and continuing up, into the cloud layer. Another Fae suddenly has his head in its fist, and pushes him down face-first through the club, turning it and the city block around it into a crater. Bucharest shakes.
And, as bloody mist sticks to his clothes and broken, quickly-healing face, Andrei realises the Fae only refrained from using silver so he could remember being used to kill thousands of people.
A tool for murder, again?
As his beast takes over, and he stands a metre taller and two hundred kilos heavier, Andrei swears to eat one of the Fae alive, spit it down the other''s throat, and drown them both in molten iron.
***
His husband, Liam Lloyd realises uneasily, is not responding. Not to texts, or calls, or scrying.
This is strange. Ryan is a meticulous bloke, has been since they hooked up at the mage academy in Yulara. He also knows what a worrywart the lich is. Coupled with the fact his magic consists of placing his mind in devices, this...should not be happening.
Liam touches down in front of their place, nervously fingering the hem of his t-shirt. ''Milk for the Khorne flakes'', with a cartoonish version of said Chaos God standing with a spoon raised overhead. The guys at the tournament thought it was a tired joke, but screw ''em. It was funny when he got into the hobby, and it still is.
Everything inside their house is off. Not just in the sense no device is running, another impossibility when Ryan is around; everything feels wrong.
The Fae turns to smile mockingly at him as it tries to stab Ryan''s heart with a knife that makes the lich''s dead stomach churn just from its looks. His husband is not a strong guy, as one can tell by the beer gut and noodle arms, but he is boosting himself with mana, though he still needs both hands to hold back the Unseelie''s extended arm.This narrative has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. If you see it on Amazon, please report it.
Ryan grins as he sees him enter(he''ll have to make a joke about this later, cheer him up), his ruddy face split by a broad grin. Sweat is running from his forehead to his grey beard with effort, and his green eyes are narrowed in concentration.
''Die,'' Liam rasps at the Fae, his magic killing the chance of it living any longer. In the kitchen, an iron knife falls from its place, ricocheting off the floor, then the table leg, the walls, the living room ceiling and walls, until it is close to the Fae, who laughs, expecting to casually dodge the slow projectile.
But even as it laughs, it breaks Ryan''s grip and raises its knife to dash at Liam, whom it sees as more dangerous.
"Dumb cunt." Liam grins skeletally at its confused, offended expression. Then, with a burst of mana, Ryan knees it in the crotch, sending it flying into the air just in time for the knife to pierce its skull.
Liam doesn''t have time to high-five his husband, though, because the neighbourhood is soon filled by the sound of exploding lightbulbs, crashing cars, dying gurgles and cold, fey laughter.
***
Aaron is off-duty at the moment, and meditating, but not relaxed.
As such, when the Fae appears out of nothing above him, intent on splitting him in half with a kick, he leans back, all six legs tensing to leap away, out out of the Black Sea and into the air.
It disappears in a burst of shadow just as dark as its hairless, muscular body, reappearing in front of him and punching him in his third head''s throat, ripping it off. The impact sends him flying off Earth, past the other planets, and headsfirst into Pluto, which shatters. Aaron barely feels it.
The Fae appears again, but he''s prepared now. With a thought, his war-harness becomes armour, and a punch that would have beheaded him again does nothing, the Fae''s fist crunching against his faceplate in a mangled mess.
Normally, the Unseelie''s presence makes all things built by civilisation fall apart, for they are bringers of chaos, but his armour was forged and enchanted by the Mother of the Forest, a hag just as wise, if not as powerful, as Merlin or Yaga.
As such, blows that would have pulverised the Earth fall harmlessly, soundlessly, as Aaron watches with faint amusement.
Snarling silently, the Fae creates a blade of shadow, and Aaron only stands still until he feels it split his armour. It laughs at his perceived retreat, reshaping the blade into throwing knives, so Aaron decides to make it choke on its laugh.
His harness can create any weapon or tool. And, in this modern age, robots and constructs are often thought of as such. The armour peels off, leaving only a thin layer that, through the Mother''s magic, restores itself, becoming armour again. The discarded material becomes an automaton, identical to Aaron in shape and strength. The Fae scoffs, then growls as the process repeats, both Aaron and the construct shedding a layer to make two more automatons. Then, four more. Eight. Sixteen.
Tens of trillions of automatons quickly fill the void between Pluto''s remains, growing more numerous every instant. Aaron knows he could drown the universe in constructs if he wished. There is no need for that.
Both he, without boosting his strength, and they are powerful enough to punch the Earth in half, or turn it to ash with a firebreath.
Grinning under his helmets, Aaron turns his armour to iron, while its enchantment keep it just as durable as before. The constructs mirror him, rushing the Fae as it screams in frustration and anger.
***
The problem with aberrants, the Shaper seethes as it directs the Unscarred towards the intruder, is that they always have to play by their own rules.
Take this ferroallergic specimen, for example. It entered the Collective''s domain despite the invisible anti-teleportation screens, the shield that splits unauthorised visitors infinitely and scatters them across the multiverse, and the defenders and drones.
It seems immune to esoteric effects. That is not a problem. The Unscarred is, too, a reversal of the quantum experiment making its existence and nature an unchangeable fact. So is the rationaliser project, meant to ground out magic and its effects in large areas.
The Unscarred teleports next to it, fist raised and clenched, striking hard enough to shatter Earth and shake the sun from core to surface. The Fae turns, grinning, punching its arm to red mist, and leaving an immense hole in its chest.
Aberrants, the Shaper thinks as it shakes its metaphorical head.
The Collective''s realm is built on, in and around Earth''s core. As the Unscarred''s machines shape themselves into a new arm and filling for its chest, the Shaper wonders how moronic you would have to be, as a Fae, to fight on a sphere of iron, which its yoctomachines are already harvesting and shaping into weapons.
The Fae''s smirk fades at the Unscarred''s new body parts. ''We were not told...how did you do that?''
''Yoctomachines, aberrant!''
***
Breakout grins under her balaclava at every punch that rocks her. The dickless bitch she''s fighting is swinging hard enough to make poor abusive Mother Earth a new asteroid belt, but that''s no problem. Breakout has always risen to the task.
Her power is breaking free of restriction, anything preventing her from doing something, and it works passively. What is preventing her from surviving its strikes? Body too weak? Become more durable.
Breakout is always strong enough to stomp the States into dust and outpace lasers, but this pointy-eared fucker is way stronger than her baseline. Stupidly faster, too. So, her power made her better.
It has always saved her ass, back when she was a dumb lil'' bitch in a neighbourhood where a mouthy black chick being the strongest around rubbed people the wrong way. She bullshitted herself into being with an older white mage, to bury the hatchet and lower the tensions. That had been a few decades after the Shattering, with racism still rampant.
The guy had promised she''d become unable to live without or keep her mind around him, and had put a spell on her that had almost made that promise reality. Her power had manifested to remove the restriction of her life and mind depending on him, in time to smash his skull in.
Since then, she''d entered FREAKSHOW (Federal Resources for the Elimination And Killing of Hostile Supernatural Organisms and Weapons-they''d come up with the acronym first) to prevent such things from happening to anyone else. She was really thankful when people had stopped letting stupid shit like race, gender and religion separate them, and instead focused on integrating supernaturals into society, and killing the bad ones.
From outside, the fight looks almost absurd: a dreadlocked woman of average height, if obviously fit and muscled, wearing thick boots, jeans and a ragged blue hoodie, wielding a metal pipe against a muscular Fae so tall she barely reaches his chest.
The pipe is another thing her power helps with, making it durable enough to withstand her strength, so she doesn''t have to fight unarmed.
Breakout has smashed the walking refrigerator to red mist several times, and that''s when her power gets off its ass to remove the restriction preventing her from winning: her pipe isn''t made of iron.
The yamadium pipe changes makeup just in time for her to break the long-haired cocksleeve in half with a laugh. Then, before its halves hit the ground, Breakout pats her jeans pocket, and realizes someone, somehow, lifted her wallet when she was returning from work.
"Can''t have shit in Detroit..." she grumbles, stomping her way through the Fae, pipe slung over one shoulder.
Breakout is angry. This is nothing unusual. She is, however, about to live up to the epithet tattooed on her knuckles. It''s ambiguous whether ''worst bitch'' refers to herself or the people she punches, but then, they''re left pretty ambiguous themselves.
"Yo, rat fodder," Breakout flips the Fae''s mangled torso onto its back with a yamadium-toed boot, looking down into its asshole of a face. "Whatever fuckwit sent you should''ve remembered this real quick, after they were done jackin'' off to themselves: I''m like a philosophy book. Whatever bitch meets me suffers an existential crisis."
Then, smashing him into paste, for real this time, Breakout saunters off, whistling tunelessly.
***
The walls of Hades are larger and tougher than any planet. This does not prevent Asterion from pulverising a hole dwarfing Earth through one as he dashes through it, giving Cerberus a curt nod. The dog yawns, tongues hanging out, knowing there''s no stopping the man-bull, and there hasn''t been for millennia.
Asterion-not the minotaur, not the bull of Minos, he has never been his son or property-spent his first life as a glorified walking stage prop in the play of Theseus'' story. After the demigod killed him, he got sent to Tartarus, where he tormented and was tormented in turn.
Eventually, Hades saw his skill, and made him a torturer, letting him eat cannibals and maneaters, in a fit of irony. Asterion glutted himself on the evil souls, becoming powerful enough to punch planets to dust and brawl with Heracles, but that was only a quarter of the transformation.
Minos has absorbed the powers, skills and memories of those he has eaten, becoming a mage, were, and so, so much more. He has also become able to dial up his strength, speed and durability endlessly, on a whim. Finally, he has become so suffused with sin only people without evil in their heart can harm him, the evil failing however strong or esoteric their attacks.
Asterion''s first deed after Hades ''accidentally'' opened the gates of the Underworld for him, centuries ago, was to find and punish the gods responsible for his existence. Poseidon, for his rage at Minos not sacrificing the Cretan Bull to him, and Aphrodite, for making Pasiphae fall in love with him, like a...a...
Asterion shakes his head as he leaps a distance that would take an anvil nine days to fall in a hundredth of a heartbeat. His mother is dead and happy, sane. Let her rest. The guilty have been punished, though not made humbler. They are gods, after all.
Asterion is a member of the Aegis Adamantine, Greece''s supernatural defence agency. It is Eidolon, one of his oldest colleagues, who calls him to Earth through the bond they formed decades ago(even after turning to eating criminals, he never got over, heh, eating women).
Minos arrives on the shores of Crete to see a woman who is not a woman. Eidolon looks up at him, her clasically pretty marble features made even more beautiful by her genuinely fond smile.
''Aster,'' she says, already using her copying power to imitate his traits. Two iterations of his powerset are always useful.
''Eidi. The emergency?''
''It will not arrive for a few minutes. When it does, it will be in Athens.''
''It always is...''
''Are you getting cold hooves from visiting your enemy''s city?'' she teases, head tilted to one side, smile widening.
''Pah! It''s always nice to see where his father fell to death after the moron forgot to replace his sail.'' If you put Aegeus'' organs in a new body, would it be a Father of Theseus Paradox? ''Why''d you call for me? Lowering your standards again?''
Eidolon shakes her head, shoulder-length locks swaying as if they were hair. ''Don''t put yourself down again...''
''I''d always go down on-for you,'' he replies, dropping a heavy wink. Honestly, a freak like him making a woman smile in exasperation as opposed to scream in horror is reward enough. The fact she was built to help people only makes him more self-conscious. The last time one did, it was Pasiphae before his hunger, unable to be sated by her breast milk, human food or grass, had driven him to eat her guards and his minders.
''I''m sure. You look...different.''
''I do?'' He thinks he looks the same as always. Head and shoulders above humans, broad, body covered in coarse black hair. Backwards-jointed, hooved legs. A tail that is always swishing in anticipation of bloodshed, or in joy at it. Ivory horns covered in the blood of the youths he has eaten, which will never dry. One of them was broken in half by Theseus, and Asterion wouldn''t heal it if he could. He can and has healed from far worse, including his body''s quarks being scattered across realities, but the reminder of his defeat remains.
A spiked nose rings twitches at every-unnecessary-breath, making sure Minos is never truly calm or unhurt. His torturers put it on when he fell in Tartarus, and, just like the broken horn, it cannot be altered.
''Yes. Your eyes are...blazing.''
Ah. It is because of the recent batch of cannibal tribes he has eaten. The Tartarus Engine, as he is known for his ever-growing power, sometimes shows when he has eaten recently through such unintentional displays.
''All the better to see you, my dear,'' he purrs huskily, leaning forward to place a hand on her waist, and lowering it. Eidolon''s stone dress is part of her body. She feels every touch on-
''Seconds until arrival,'' she says curtly, walking away from him. Already, she is tapping into her copy of his powers, and imitating several other beings. His arcane sense can tell: the Nemean Lion, the Lernaean Hydra, Typhon...
Much like Samuel Shiftskin, one of his few and best friends, who can imitate and combine the traits of any beast, Eidolon is a signatory if the Syncretic Treaty. Even existing at her strongest is seen as an act of war, unless creation is under attack from overwhelming outside forces.
''Iron, Aster,'' she adds, not looking at him. Asterion nods, asking for an explanation. With a pulse of magic, his flesh becomes iron, while retaining its might.
But, as they dash towards Athens, Asterion can only wonder what is so dangerous, that Eidolon is channeling such power without the pantheons coming down on her head...
Empty Tomb, Chapter 2
The Seelie Fae, depending who, how and when you ask, will tell you their name is derived from or has inspired the word ''silly'': happy, carefree, harmless. Whether they are being ironic when they say this is up to debate. They have also been known to claim their name and the word evolved together, but separate, without influencing each other.
At the moment, I wasn''t sure which version I agreed with. The Unseelie didn''t look unhappy, and definitely didn''t sound sad.
Almost all Fae were inhumanly beautiful-as in, inhuman and beautiful. Barring Puck, and some of the more monstrous Unseelie, most Fae had to shapeshift in order to appear anything other than perfect.
Not a problem I''d ever shared. Some people suffer from success, others without it.
Most of the Unseelie who filled the training room, walking from the ceiling to the floor on air, or stopping halfway through to stand on nothing, were grey-haired and grey-skinned, like me, and black eyed, like I used to be, before the Devil gave me my mind back, and threw me out of limbo and back into unlife, though not after I mistook God for him...to His face.
Not my proudest, or smartest, moment. When I concentrated and strained my pure white, godly eyes, I could see one staring back with cold amusement, yellow and black slit like the serpent its owner had once shifted into.
"One eye on you, one on the world", its unblinking, gleaming stare seemed to say.
Not all Unseelie looked like pointy-eared strigoi, though: some had dark-green or black, cracked flesh that resembled wood, with emerald mana shining through the gaps, toothless mouths spread in permanent smiles, hornlike branches rising through manes of leaves. And these were just the humanlike ones; I could point out at least half a dozen redcaps, looking closer to red-skulled, shaved, needle-fanged chimps than anything human, clawed hands closed around the hafts of blades or scythes. A nuckelavee, the taloned hands of its human torso brushing the floor while the horse half paced, skinless flesh twitching, glared at us with a single, balefully-glowing red eye set in the centre of its metre-long skull. That was not the worst, though.
In the middle of the Fae, between the nuckelavee and three redcaps, something that resembled shadows they way I resembled corpses stood. The featureless, almost oval silhouette did not move, but every time my attention shifted even slightly, it seemed to come closer to me, or...
No, wait. Was the room getting smaller?
I blinked, shaking my head, then looked with my new sight, remembering Szabo''s jabs. His words had irked me, too.
Mimir''s sight revealed a whole bunch of frankly useless information. I didn''t need to know the ancestry and childhood of every Fae present, how many people the redcaps had bled to live up to their names, or what the nuckelavee didn''t do to people it caught(very few things; in fact, given how drooled dripped from its horse head''s mouth, and how something that was definitely not drool dripped from the other head, it was pretty excited to get its claws on us). But the shadow...
You know those ''nothing to see here'' signs people sometimes ironically place around? Mimir''s sight might as well have been showing me one, for all I learned. In fact, according to my godly sight, the shadow not only had no future, it had no past, either, nor was it even present in the multiverse, the aether between realities, where the dead who prayed to no god went, or anywhere else. I could only see what it...wasn''t.
It was Diego who broke the Mexican standoff. His sword, wide as my hand, its edge dripping ruby blood, trembled in his grip, as if he''d been seized by uncontrollable rage. With clenched fangs, he lowered it, the tip pointing down, a scarlet droplet gathering upon it, milimetres from the floor.
''I can''t believe this...'' the vamp said in a heartbroken tone, head lowered, face hidden in the shadow of his hat, before he stood up straighter with a snap, eyes glowing red as they bored into the Unseelie. ''Do you have any idea how much we''ll have to pay these bums extra for repelling an attack right before Christmas?!"
And the blood drop fell.
The Fae looked at him in disbelief for half a microsecond. Then, before the other half elapsed, they leapt at us, moving so fast lightning a lightning bolt would have looked sluggish.
I knew, because I created several in an attempt to slow them down. My strigoi nature gave me dominion over weather, and, over the years, my skill had grown enough that I could summon aspects of it without manipulating the weather around me itself.
Nearly thirteen hundred times faster than sound, the bolts flashed electric-blue or ivory-white as the streaked through the air, only for even the slowest Fae, the human-looking ones, to casually sidestep them when they were a hand''s breadth from their skin. A few of the smug fucks even backflipped over them, and one, using the connection with the natural world all Fae had, whatever their Court, waited until a bolt was nearly touching her black eye, then, smiling, leapt above and onto it, running towards us on the still-flying bolt like an acrobat on a tightrope.
Alright, new plan. I''d hoped to at least blind them, even for an instant, until someone faster than me got something made of iron we could use to beat them to death with, and make it stick.
I cursed myself for letting my cross behind in my room before coming to train, not wanting to give my partners a chance to snatch it away and use it against me.
There was probably a metaphor for everything important to me, somewhere in there.
I leapt at the acrobat Fae just as she willed the air around her into becoming armour. From the corner of my eye, I saw Radu, this time in hybrid form, holding off four of the redcaps, while the fifth, short legs wrapped around his spine, alternated between punching his skull to splinters or ripping away chunks of flesh the size of dinner plates every microsecond, for all that the were was just as durable as me. Fangs gleaming, Radu jumped onto his back, trapping the redcap between his body and the yamadium floor, while tearing at the other four Unseelie with his clawed feet and hands.
The sixth redcap had jumped into the midst of the other Luna agents, and was currently in the middle of ripping a wereotter in half every time the agent tried to get her paws on it, while its stubby legs kicked a group of wererats to pieces whenever they tried to tear at it. The weres healed just as fast as they were destroyed, but were making no progress.
Meanwhile, the nuckelavee, who was either a jailbird or a football fan, had decided to knock the biggest motherfucker''s block off, as a result getting into a ripping and tearing contest with Thundertail. Though far smaller than the dragon, the nuckelavee gave as good as it got, hooves and fists clashing with claws, wings and a trainlike tail, every exchange packing enough power to vapourise mountains. It was only Thundertail''s will that kept the hundreds of gigatons in every strike from damaging Romania as a side-effect, though I''d be damned to say why the Unseelie was worrying about collateral. Eventually, the dragon, having had enough, flexed the belly the nuckelavee had ripped a bus-sized hole into, sending the Unseelie into the air. Before it could use its powers to make a foothold, Thundertail spat a bolt of unnaturally-powerful lightning at it, blasting it to vapour, just like he had done to me during our spar.
It didn''t do anything, of course. Unless hurt by iron, Fae could regenerate from being erased from existence, having the quantum foam making them up divided across endless realities, or even being retconned from the timeline, just like strigoi could, unless harmed by holy power. However, Thundertail''s breath attack meant the nuckelavee regenerated in midair, only to be blasted to steam once more. Grinning with satisfaction while his belly healed, Thundertail looked ready to keep this up all night.
I was almost close enough to touch the Fae by the time I processed all of this, but it was not to be. Instead of the grey-armoured female I had expected to clash with, a black gauntlet smashed into my nose from somewhere, sending me through the sparring room''s ceiling, as well as every other floor between it and Omu base''s hollow mountain peak, then the rock itself, and into the air, where my passage dispersed the thick clouds filling the night sky for tens of kilometres around.
And, dammit, my nose wasn''t healing. It actually hurt, too. The fu-
The gauntlet smashed into my back this time, sending me flying faster than my dead eyes could process. By the time the blurs left my sight, I realised I wasn''t on Earth anymore, given the thick, yellowish clouds I split with my passage, before smashing through several volcanoes, the force turning them to clouds of dark smoke.
This was not how I wanted to get acquainted with Venus. The planet was infinitely uglier than the goddess it was most commonly associated with, (not that I used to have a crush on her...oh, shut up. Everyone did, especially since she stopped being a vain, vengeful hellion) and my impromptu, unasked-for makeup session didn''t do it any favour.
The bruises my head got from vapourising the volcanoes healed instantly, but the pain between my shoulder blades didn''t vanish. The reason for it quickly appeared to stand a few metres before me.
''David Dravich?'' the Fae asked in a melodic voice, a smile quirking his lips in such a way I could barely wait to rip his tongue out and swap it with his junk. So tall I barely reached the bottom of his broad, black-armoured chest, the Fae''s long, silver hair was pulled back by a simple obsidian circlet, framing his grey, angular face. His voice was as beautiful as any human singer''s, despite the fact Venus'' atmosphere, not to mention the roaring volcanoes in the background, should have made it inaudible.
''Who the fuck told you to call me that?''
''Ah. It is true, then. The truth angers you.''
''Your mom, I see. Tell her only she''s allowed to taunt me, and that''s if she asks my girlfriend first. Don''t worry, they''ll have time to talk while Mia pegs her-''
The punch broke my arm, and almost tore my shoulder out of its socket, so I forced myself smile up at pretty boy. "Aww, jealous? Calm your tits, I''m sure you and mommy will get to maintain the family wreath when my zmeu is done fisting you-"
A spiked knee broke my jaw, so my laugh was decidedly uglier than usual. ''It''s fine! I don''t kinkshame, bro...''The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement.
''You know I could kill you any moment.'' The Fae sniffed. ''Have you heard of me, Dravich?''
''Didn''t I see you behind that gloryhole at-''
His slap sent half my fangs flying, along with flecks of congealed blood. I landed on all fours. ''Man, you sucked, and not in a good way. I thought maybe I liked guys too, but you convinced me I don''t. Guess you scared me straight!''
''Quiet,'' he snapped, one moment looking down at me from several steps away, the next hefting me above him with one gauntleted hand. Its touch burned me, the jagged symbols carved into it so dark light was drained into them, but it was nothing compared to the pain of my ruined face. Not that I''d let this bitch see it. I wouldn''t give him the satisfaction of beating me mentally, too, fucking dammit.
And where the hell were Szabo and Diego, anyway? They were our heaviest hitters.
As it turned out, while the vamp would only tell us what he went through after the Fright, while we were counting casualties, the strigoi wasn''t far away.
''I''ve never been able to stand creatures like you.'' The Fae closed his eyes with a weary sigh. ''Acting defiant when they can''t achieve anything...what are you hoping to do?''
''Certainly not you, but can I ask for your name?'' I wiggled bloodied eyebrows, and my half-toothless grin widened when one of his eyes twitched.
''In the crude language of the Island of Tin, I would be Coldhold, Count of Greyreach. A county, I suppose, in our realm.'' Coldhold snickered to himself. ''Speaking to a dead man, who''s about to die again...I swear, I am turning as stupid as you, Dravich. Would you prefer to die like a worm, or on your feet? But remember: whatever your answer, I can kill you with my hands behind my back.''
Coldhold only gripped my throat for a fraction of a microsecond longer, before I was sent flying from his grasp, and he turned, staggering, arms severed and gauntlets shattered at the elbows. They had been turned to red mist, but healed even faster than mine would have.
''What a coincidence~'' a lilting voice said, and I couldn''t believe I was thankful to hear it. ''I can kill you with your hands behind my back, too!''
And, as a demonstration, Szabo leaned to one side, giving Coldhold a good look at his severed appendages. The Fae stared at him with disgust for a moment, before his face became a mask of disbelieving hatred.
''How?'' he asked. ''The shadow should have killed you!''
''Oh? The Bleeding Edge is taking care of it. They don''t call him that because he''s new, you know?'' Szabo dropped me a wink, shifting from one leather-booted foot to the other. Snarling, Coldhold poured his will into the world around us, while leaping at Szabo with clenched fists.
But, without his holy gauntlets, it seemed he had no other means to damage the strigoi. Punches that would have shattered my skull only resulted in broken arms for the Fae, while spikes of rock, shaped from a country''s worth of stone and shaped to an impossibly sharp and fine point, smashed against Szabo''s eyes so fast they glowed white from the heat, only to shatter, not even piercing them. Space bent to reveal portals into churches, mosques and sites of worship so alien or unholy I had to avert my gaze, while Coldhold grasped the air inside them with his will, sending holy objects flying at Szabo, who laughed, disappearing and reappearing faster than I could see, hand buried into the Fae''s neck to smash his face into the holy projectiles instead. Cursing in outrage, the Fae tried to bend time and make himself faster, only for Szabo to punch him to mist every time, shattering his concentration. Attempts to erase the strigoi from existence only left him standing, naked and laughing, in huge, unnaturally-smooth pits that extended past the horizon, his nature making Szabo a fact of existence.
Finally, Szabo reached into the hole left in his chest by his suicide, grabbing something I hadn''t seen until then, something that gleamed dully. Smiling, Szabo flashed around Coldhold several times, smashing my cross over his face, flattening it until it was uglier than mine. Then, he cut the Count''s legs in half at the knees.
''No need to have you bleed out. You have answers I just know you are eager to share,'' Szabo muttered, looking down at the mutilated Fae, who spat at him. Coldhold spat up at the strigoi, who, laughing, used his wind manipulation to send it back the Count''s throat. Before Coldhold could even grimace in disgust, Szabo smiled widely, grabbing his tongue.
''You want to swap fluids~?'' the strigoi asked, before ripping his tongue out and shoving it down Coldhold''s throat. Then, not giving him time to spit it out, Szabo did it again, and again, until the Count''s bloated throat burst, allowing a mass of bloodied grey tongues to fall onto his chest. ''Should I kiss you again, darling?''
Not waiting for Coldhold to regenerate his throat and answer, Szabo grabbed the Fae''s silver hair, ripping more and more out each time it healed, and wrapping the clumps around the Count''s leg stumps, to slow his bleeding.
''I know it''s a hair-thin excuse...for bandages. But...'' Szabo shrugged. ''Dare I hope you will tell me how and why you attacked Omu base? I know the Unseelie can ignore any defences or means of detection created by civilisation, for you are bringers of chaos. But the wards? The spells?''
''Why don''t you ask your toy over there?'' Coldhold jerked his head at me, causing the strigoi to laugh. ''He seems to have an answer for everyone, and a need to talk and talk.''
''Oh, my...'' Szabo giggled, eyes closed, smacking my bloodied cross against one palm. ''You think I see David as a source of amusement because I try to make him stop pretending he''s a hairless monkey? Can you, truly, be as stupid as you look? Have I found the missing link between dense and misinformed fools?''
''Mock me all you want. In the end, you will die as you fear, skinthief-unremembered by history, let alone anyone worthwhile.''
Szabo laughed even louder now. ''Look at you! You can only attempt to hurt me with words, and are failing even at that. Now...my question again. Will you tell us why and how you assaulted us? We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the haaaaard way~''
''Go to the hell you claim not to fear.''
''And here I thought you had that dog in you, like me. But I was wrong. You''re a bitch.''
And, with a swipe of one arm, Szabo shattered Coldhold''s remaining armour, leaving him defenceless but for a gambeson-like garment. That didn''t last long, either, Szabo quickly shredding it into dust.
Shifting shape into something that made my eyes cross whenever I tried to look at or away from it, Szabo grabbed hold of the bare Fae, my cross held in an appendage the likes of which I''d never seen on Earth.
Coldhold didn''t stop screaming for a long, long time.
***
The shadow, Diego decided, was much like common supernaturals: a law unto itself, telling the universe how it worked. While ordinary matter was erased when it passed through it, Diego''s vampiric nature and sword let him touch and knock it around as if it was made of flesh, even though each touch left burns that did not heal.
Kind of like that song about skin. It was far less cheerful than the music Diego usually listened to, which was just a sign of how badly things were going, if he was thinking about it.
Though the shadow shifted mass constantly, Diego currently estimated it at about twelve trillion tons, given how it had quickly turned a mountain and the land around it into gravel by dropping onto it after he tackled it out of Omu base.
As if such weight mattered to any monster worth their salt...
With a cheerful grin, Diego rushed the shadow, kicking it off Earth before it could attempt to erase him. Then, when it was close to the moon, Diego intercepted and tackled it into the sun, for all that it weighed more than a hundred mountains, so fast light would take more than an hour to catch up to them.
Sunlight sealed away his esoteric powers, but he needed somewhere he could cut loose against this unbeing. Besides...he had some tricks up his veins.
Diego''s healing, much like his senses and physical prowess, was always at his disposal. So, when he cut his gut open, the cloud of gore hanging in the void, it closed up instantly, just in time for him to repeat.
Diego leapt, legs crossed under him, allowing a tendril of shadow to pass harmlessly, erasing hundreds of thousands of kilometres of solar plasma.
What a dim fellow...
Diego cut himself open again and again, until he was surrounded by a sphere of gore that shielded him from the sunlight. Then, his powers returned, Diego grasped hold of all his blood at once, drawing it out only for it to refill instantly. Then, again.
And again.
And again...
Vampires gained power by drinking blood. However, even when losing it, they regenerated just as powerful as before being harmed. It was not the liquid''s presence in their veins, but the act of consuming, that increased their powers.
Which meant that, when Diego was done bleeding enough to cover the sun, turning it red, he didn''t lose anything, and gained much.
The shadow tried to erase him or his sea of blood, but Diego, using his weather manipulation, grabbed hold of the solar winds. It didn''t matter that they were hardly a real weather phenomenon. It was all about symbolism.
Spinning the star''s surface like a disc, Diego mixed the plasma with his blood, beginning to shape his weapon.
The shadow lunged at him, thousands of times faster than light, and the vampire raised his sword, grasping it in both hands.
Then, he dispersed he blood he had shaped to look like himself, and struck the shadow from behind.
The force of the strike was such that its shockwave split the sun, sending the halves millions of kilometres away. The sun gods would be mad, but...he was saving the world. They''d understand, or kill him, thus freeing him from worries.
While the shadow spun in the void, reeling from the strike, Diego grasped the blood sea he had shed, spinning it into a spear that glowed with veins of plasma. The blood would allow it to touch the shadow, and the plasma...would add a little power.
Diego''s projectile smashed into the shadow''s ''head'', splitting it like a rotten melon. But, before the creature dispersed, it flung a part of itself at Diego, faster than it had ever moved before (had it worked itself into a rage?), cutting him in half at the waist.
As he spun in place, drifting towards nothing and bleeding out, Diego laughed drily to himself.
This was like back when he''d been left stranded on that nameless island off the coast of South America, before his sire had turned him to save him from dying of thirst, instead giving him an endless one.
But, really, the vampiress just hadn''t wanted to entertain herself with a dead man. She liked them lively, as she had told him.
His sire had never asked for his consent, especially once his pleas and prayers, followed by curses, had made it clear he hadn''t given it.
It had taken him decades to feel human again, let alone like a man.
"Smile and wave, nino," his mother used to tell him. "You are not smart, or strong, or brave. But you make others laugh. Do not let them see your tears. No one likes a sad jester."
Sometimes, Diego wondered what had become of his sire.
Now, he just hoped he wouldn''t be found by another monster.
***
''Gerald Reyes, you say? And Sir Ronald, too?''
''The Dragonlayer, yes.'' The old, captive mage''s wrinkled face twisted into a smile. ''Grandfather bless him and his wife.''
''For giving you research subjects? I mean, unofficial grandchildren?''
''I love all my Knights, and their children, too, uncle.''
''And why were they here? Both ARC and New Camelot, I mean. Talk about rivalry...'' Especially when the UK''s supernatural defence agency had been founded at roughly the same time as ARC''s Camelot division, exacerbating the problem caused by similar names, chosen in ignorance of each other.
''The aim is actually collaboration, I think. They plan to break Nimue''s prison, so I may walk the world once more.'' The mage''s human mask slipped, his true features casting no shadow, for even the darkness was afraid of some things, even when-especially when-they had turned away from it to serve the light.
''That would be something to see. Maybe you can get rid of the ghostwriter, and finish the Hero''s Handbook yourself! It''s hilarious, really. I''m sure the Roundhouse would agree.''
New Camelot was nicknamed thus both because of how their headquarters looked, and to differentiate between them and the ARC division meant to integrate supernaturals into society, like Arthur''s knights had once done.
The mage chuckled. ''Perhaps. But tell me more about your new favourite, uncle. I see all there was, is and might be, and your eye is always on him.''
''My mark, too.''
''Indeed. So...?''
''So. He is interesting. Makes me laugh almost as much as little Faust did, when I sent him Mephistopheles as a poisoned gift.''
''Are you planning to paint a bedroom''s walls with this one''s remains, too?''
''Why, do you want him?''
''...Hmm.''
''And you say he should be worried about me...'' A great, horned head shook fondly, before its owner squeezed his nephew''s scarred hand with something a human might have perceived as affection. ''Goodbye, Merlin.''
''For now,'' the greatest cambion mage to ever live agreed, knowing his father was seething at his son''s closeness to his lord.
''Interesting, indeed...'' The mage smiled to himself, morningstar eyes twinkling. Almost as interesting as when his uncle had taken the name of an old, petty king no one remembered anymore, save as his.
There was a lesson to be learned there. He just hoped David Silva wouldn''t become a stepping stone for someone greater before he truly opened and learned to see with his old friend''s eyes.
Empty Tomb, Chapter 3
Say whatever you will about Coldhold: he never once screamed in fear as Szabo''s monstrous form worked him over. He screamed in pain at the cross'' touch, and cursed the strigoi in disgust, but received only laughs and comments in a conversional tone.
''Thank you for screaming! If you stayed silent while I touched you, I''d have felt like I was with Csilla again. And trust me, you''re way too skinny to remind me of my wife...''
''Do you know sign language? It''s for the interrogation, see? I''m meeting my great-grandbrats this Chrismas, and I want to give them your ears! I''ve been bringing body parts home for years, and I hope we''ll get enough to build something soon...''
''No, no, stay on your side. The writhing looks better this way...''
''David, want to get in on this?'' Szabo smiled at me without turning, instead forming a mouth on something I supposed was his shoulder.
''No thanks. You seem to have things well in...under control,'' I said, trying to ignore the voice in my head screaming for the Fae''s torture. My strigoi side was being pretty insistent, too.
''Oh, brother...'' Szabo was now looking humanoid enough again for me to tell he was shaking his head. ''You have literally nothing to lose.''
''Yeah, well..'' I winced, getting to my feet with a creak. Damn, but I actually sounded my age. My broken bones still sent stabs of pain through me with every move, but I noticed that, for example, brushing the ground with my broken arm neither exacerbated nor lessened the pain. My flesh was still numb to sensation, besides the parts the Count had shattered with his gauntlets.
''Maybe I''d get over there if twitching didn''t make my brain riot,'' I told Szabo, looking at the bruises mottling my grey skin with dismay. In the last eight years, only a couple things had managed to leave their mark on my body. The noose I used to hang myself, for one. Chernobog''s slap, which had knocked out fangs, for another.
Well...the second one had come with a silver lining, I suppose. Mia had once claimed she could give me a French kiss without me parting my teeth, before showing how flexible her tongue was.
But, now? Now I was not only as ugly as my worse half, I was also half a cripple, and you could have flown a paper plane through my mouth.
What a great Christmas gift for everyone. I was sure they''d love to see me getting fucked up permanently like this.
''What, is this the first time you''ve been truly wounded?'' Szabo asked, now back to his human shape. ''I''m baffled, with how insufferable you are.''
I gave him the most deadpan look I could manage with my messed-up face, receiving only a steady stare and slight raise of his eyebrows in response.
''The cause is the cure, David,'' Szabo said after a few moments, rubbing his belly. If not for everything else about him, his round gut, covered in wiry grey hair, would have looked comical.
''The hell? Are you saying this bitch''s gear had a healing function? The gear you shattered?''
Szabo looked at me once more, then at Coldhold, receiving a cold, hateful glare. Thankfully, the Fae now looked as bad as I did. Then, he pursed his lips, clasping his hands in front of himself.
''I will pretend he knocked your brain loose, brother.''
''The fuck''s that supposed to mean!? Szabo!'' I called after him, walking closer, broken arm swining limply at my side. ''Don''t you dare pull that cryptic bullshit on me again,'' I growled, putting a hand on his round shoulder. Szabo held my gaze, worrying his lower lip with his fangs. Was he keeping his anger under control? Or his laughter?
''You know what happened the last time people withheld something important for me,'' I continued.
''When you learned who your real daddy is? I think I want to hear that story again.''
There was no point to trying to wipe the smile off his face. Even on my best day, and this was turning out to be one of the worse ones.
''Yes, it''s almost as funny as living through it. I meant when you, Reem, and every damn god out there looked at Chernobog coiling up inside me and did jackshit.''
''Well said, every damn god. I''m glad you''re starting to damn yours, too.'' Szabo''s smile widened when I staggered back, claws digging through my palms s I clenched my fists.
''That''s not...you know fucking well I wasn''t including Him-''
''Why?''
I searched for words a few times, trying to say anything that wasn''t chockfull of invective.
''God doesn''t intervene in the lives of His people because He values free will.'' Look at me, deftly ignoring his question.
Szabo nodded. ''Ah, right. The fact the Headhunt resulted in a rather ardent worshipper of his gaining Mimir''s perception was just a happy little accident, as Ross would''ve said.''
''Are you scared He''ll ask me to use it on you?'' I taunted, trying not to sound angry.
''Terrified. But tell me, if he is all-knowing, all -powerful ?and all-loving, how come there is suffering?''
''I told you, free will-''
''Hmm? He knows the pain everyone will go through and does nothing? Even I could respect that callousness. Or maybe he''s just strong enough to seem almighty, but only knows so much? Are you happy praying to an overpowered idiot?''
''You have children, right?'' I asked.
''They died long ago. Though not because I stood by and watched when I could have done literally anything to help.''
''But you were a father. If you saw your child about to make a mistake you knew would hurt, would you stop them, or let them learn a lesson?''
Coldhold, who seemed to have grown bored while we debated the Problem of Evil, opened his mouth, only for Szabo to stomp down on it without looking.
''Your example does not work. And you know why? Because it''s insane to punish a child for something you knew they''d do and which you could have prevented. Go find Adam''s soul and ask him, or ring up old Scratch. He''s got his eye on you.''
''These examples don''t work either. God-''
''Sends people to Hell because they commit sins he knows about, can prevent, and condemns, sins which, allegedly, only became possible because of something he also knew would happen and could have prevented.''
''We''re going in circles,'' I shook my head. Maybe, on another day, I-shit! ''Szabo, were the Unseelie dead or incapacitated when you left Earth?''
''My stars, David! You finally remembered you''re supposed to protect your world and colleagues after you stopped being offended at your god''s hypocrisy being pointed out!'' Szabo clapped thrice, slowly, but I slapped his hand down when he began to crookedly cross himself. There was only so much blasphemy I could take.
''Don''t make me find out what these eyes can really do,'' I warned him, gripping his wrist. He didn''t stop smiling.
''Using a false, pagan god''s power to crush Christianity''s enemy? Ah, the beauty of religious appropriation...''
***
Szabo, I learned, needed just over three minutes to fly from Earth to Venus. He gripped Coldhold by the throat as we flew, and me by my healthy hand, because I was far too slow to keep up with him.
I bet I was more embarrassed than the Fae. And not just because of how much Szabo had rattled me, again, without actually doing anything horrifying.
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Was my faith that weak? Or was I a moron for thinking enough faith left no room for doubt?
But God ?had intervened, in the end. He had...had offered to send me to the afterlife. Was I special in His eyes, for some unfathomable reason? Did every dead Christian get a second chance at life? And if not, why was I more deserving?
The thought made me feel almost as guilty as the one that maybe it wasn''t so bad if God had influence over the user of Mimir''s power, rather than another deity or pantheon.
I...I''d have to talk to Aya Reem. She had experience balancing work and faith.
After Szabo dropped me off at the remains Omu base-the Unseelie had been killed or driven off, but only Thundertail, drooling bloody froth, and a wild-eyed weredeer had survived. The rest lay in twisted poses, impaled by silver blades or spikes, or crushed under silver bludgeons. The necromancers and their servants had been torn apart, never to rise again.
''Take him to a Mobius cell in another base, balaur,'' Szabo said, tossing Coldhold to Thundertail, who snapped up the Fae with a vengeful look.
Mobius cells simulated the dimensionless Outer Void, and became more harder to break out of the more a prisoner tried. There was nothing to strike or warp, and teleportation and portals simply failed. It was rumoured Fixer used them as brainstorming rooms, because mundane reality was too malleable for him.
I could believe that. The Fixer spent most of his time outside the multiverse, because he could turn it into an eldritch nightmare, or nothing, with a stray thought.
''Szabo?'' I asked after he blurred back into my line of sight, in a new set of leathers over an ARC shirt. I had to wonder if he had gone to Hungary to get dressed, since Omu base had been destroyed, the mountain cracked open like a rotten tooth. ''Is there anything I can help with?''
''Yes,'' He adjusted his coat''s collar. ''Grit your teeth, brother, or find a way to heal those wounds. We''re doing cleanup.''
''Where? All of Ilfov?''
''The world, David.''
***
The Happy Cemetery, the dust of the dead remade as golems to tear apart their families.
The Redeemer, reshaped into a fiendish monstrosity that destroyed half the churches in Brazil, before a joint effort by ARC and the Circle Bizarre had stopped and returned it to its proper state.
The Great Wall, cracked open to let out the vengeful echoes of the walled-in, sacrificed builders.
Krampus and his counterparts, manifesting to rampage.
And so, so much more...so much worse...Aokigahara appearing over east Asia again, the things under the pyramids rising up in the desert, in the jungle, under the sea...
By the time I got home while the higher-ups tried to get their act together, I could almost fool myself into thinking I was physically tired. I didn''t have to fake mental exhaustion, though.
Mia looked worse than I felt, which was saying something.
My zmeu''s temporary work for ARC had turned into a job, though I''d be hard pressed to say if she was in for the thrill or to help people.
Not that I dared press her at the moment.
Mia had learned harnessing the magical power inherent to zmei to create constructs and powers by drawing shapes on air. I guess she hadn''t found time to heal herself, though.
''Hey,'' Mia croaked, leaning down to kiss me with a mangled mouth. Her single eye gazed at me with worry, nerves growing in the other, empty socket as I watched.
''Don''t worry,'' she grinned, all fangs, because there was nothing else. ''You should have seen the other bitch.''
''Are you sure you weren''t poisoned, or cursed? Or-''
Sigh. ''They checked me, David, before sending me home. Didn''t they do the same to you?''
''Even so...''
''I''m fine,'' ?she insisted, lips beginning to grow back. "As you so often tell me. Healthy, too."
''As I so often tell you,'' I joked lamely. ''The Drake base...how did you manage? Are you allowed to say?'' I added, just as she shook her head, then sighed, shoulders sagging. ''You''re alive. That''s enough for me.''
''She just gotta be female, preferably alive,'' Mia grunted in a mock-dudebro voice, her contralto lending itself to imitating men. Her voice went from simply deep to "motorbike", depending on her excitement, as my neighbours and I had learned.
''I mean, I wouldn''t mind if you were undead, either...''
''Reaaaaly. What kind?''
''Hmm. Not a braineater. I don''t have one around you, anyway.''
''One head is sometimes enough, David,'' Mia smiled, putting a hand on my hip. It didn''t stay there long.
''Why, thank you...um. I''m really happy to see you-''
''I can tell~''
''-but...is there something wrong with your power? Why not speed up the healing?''
''I''d rather try to heal you, darling.''
I wasn''t sure she could. That time she had sewed my head back on had been, well...a miracle. Both God and the Devil had been involved. Mia had essentially dropped out of college, though her ARC training made up for both her studies and lost job. I wasn''t sure about her salary, but mine was well over a dozen times bigger than when I was a teacher, not counting the hazard pay for certain missions.
Lucas would have happily let her remain an employee and check in when she could, if not pay like she was working full-time, but Mia had refused, not wanting to get tangled up in too many things.
''Well,'' I smirked. ''I''ve got this swelling that needs hands-on care. Anything you wanna watch before you play doctor?''
''You, stripping.''
***
''Merry late Christmas, love,'' I muttered, standing up to stretch. The cleanup had taken up all of Christmas Eve, Christmas, and most of the following day, so that it was midnight by the time we got home.
Mia, lying on her back with her muscular arms crossed under her head, didn''t reply, instead spitting a fireball that reshaped itself into a heart near the ceiling, briefly lighting up the dark room before being snuffed out by her will.
''Merry Christmas, David,'' her smile quickly became sardonic. ''As merry as I can feel sitting here like a moron while you limp around like a gimp.''
''Mia...''
''Oh, shut up. What''s my excuse for not being able to pull it off twice?''
''Not having God''s help?''
Mia looked like she was about to say something very biting, before looking away. ''What will you do while waiting for orders?''
''You, preferably...'' I leaned to one side while I winked, dodging the thrown pillow. ''I''ll have to make up to my friends for missing Christmas. Pops, too.''
''I wanted to meet Lucas before this clusterfuck.'' As good a word for it as any. We weren''t sure how many millions had died in the Fright Before Christmas, as it was quickly becoming known, except several, probably in the double digits.
''I think he and his brothers will be together. They celebrated with their parents, remember? Maybe when I go to Lucian and Bianca, he''ll also be present. I''ll pass your thoughts along, if you''re too tired.''
''No. I want to come.''
It took me a few moments to realise she wasn''t just talking about the visit, and by then, I was on my back. Again.
If only all my problems were like this...
Empty Tomb, Chapter 4