《Author chan and her life of misfortune! (Hiatus info in original script)》 Prologue San Chapter San 1 Hello everyone, my name is Illyas and I''m a reincarnated person. So I''ma make this quick on my backstory cuz I wanna get going with my plot armor that Author gave to me so no complains "k". My former name was Ilyas Yuimi. I was born on the planet Tera in a family with a really unique background as my former ancestors did many legendary feats, for example, the 376th family head had 60% of the 5th heads ancient Chinese immortal blood in his veins giving him a monster level talent in both Qi and Spirit Cultivation. Ascending into the leagues of immortals and having the ability to summon millions and millions of top rank spiritual beast from the higher spirit plane such as the Asura plane. Another one was when the 769th family head carried 37% of 546th''s family head genes and became a genius scientist and eventually leading the world to reach the peak in technology and science knowledge. Also did I say that our family migrated from many multiverses to another? We''ve gone from and to many different multiverses and giving births to new genes in the new generation of the family, like for example when the 1557th young master of the Yuimi family was able to give himself the advantage to cultivate Ki in a mana filled universe with no laws of Ki cultivation at all. Anyways, I sound like I''m boasting but I''ma stop, anyways let me introduce myself again ok?! I''ll take all the complains as a yes! Thank you! Hello again everyone! My name is Illyas Yuimi, the third daughter of 7999th family head of the Yuimi family and also an Authatality practitioner. Nice to meet you, my- re-ea-de-rs. Orrrrrrrr so is my past life''s identity, I''m a Authatality practitioner, the same as the first head of the Yuimi family, I train in the path to become an Author. You guys know those Authors who created LN''s such as Mushogu Tensei and gave that Yudeus that thick a** plot armor or Xuanhuan''s like Against the Ascended where Hun Jhe has that 100% ploteball that he uses on his future harem members and gets a 100% catch rate. Even a Masteir ball doesn''t have that much capability. The author''s content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. Weeeeelll what do you think my ability is? I have the ability to become a Author but instead of writing books through imagination, I can tamper with reality to instead create my books that way. That''s right, you guys might be lucky enough for me to kill you with truck-chan and reincarnate you into a fantasy world with plot armor as thick as Fu Bengs butt. You like it that way don''t you? THEN BOW DOWN AND LICK MY FEET YOU MONGRELS!!!! Is definitely not what I just said. Anyways continuing on. How did I die you wonder? Weellllll, at that time, I was re-watching that Gagami''s guy from Feath''s Note and when it came to the potato scene. I tried to imitate the scene at the same time as that Gagami but who would''ve thought that I would bite my lip and accidentally killed myself by activating plot sword and made my heart stop by changing my fate through that way, well at less, I didn''t so if you did, congrats! And whadaya expect, I reincarnated as the Protagonist''s childhood friend in a fu*king fantasy world, I literally hate myself for activating that plot sword now. - Yuimi. Hello everyone. I back from writing that into my book, sorry if there are tons of mistakes, I literally rush this, tomorrow I''ll edit it correctly and work on chapter 1 OK. See ya. Chapter 1 is the offspring of Prologue for newbs I''m the Author! True Chapter 1 Hello Everyone! Illyas here again to bring you the adventure of my misfort- "Ahh!" "Ahh!" "FASTER!" "HARDER!" Can''t you be a bit quiet you two next door. Sorry kids, no fap materials in my novel ok, I don''t want any white stuff on my book, I mean it''s disgusting. I might as well kill you with truck chan if you do so. Anyways, continuing on, Illyas here with your everyday reincarnation story. Sooo long story short, I was born in a Dukes household as the 1st born of the main wife in random a** kingdom in some random a** human continent. It would be fine if that was it, a normal family with a good background and standing in the kingdom, but who would have a nice time if you''re born into a freaks household. My mothers name is Juana Yu Ultio and with a long red hair that stretches down to the waist, small pecky nose and ruby like lips with golden eyes, a figure that can top any top reigning models on Tera and her E cup size breatst. Sounds great right? Right, if only that was it. Do you know what that sound was? The one at the beginning of the chapter. Yeah, no that''s definitely not my moms sound. It was my dads, Yep, she''s a sadist and no not any normal sadist, a top ranking Sadist who toke over 100,000 soliders in the battlefield with only her whips and skill to inflict pain. She has many nickname such as Devil or the Demon of Pain but the most popular one that every knows and that is ''God of Toture'', You could say that she''s Ogita''s teacher. (Gintama reference if you don''t get it) An my dad, Fei Yu Ultio. He might be a masochist but he''s scary in his own way, my dad is a reincarnate, every time in the day and night except getting hit by mom is spent on making Atomic bombs and other mass destruction weapon focus on weaponising chemicals. He''s a mad scientist. ''Ahh'' the memories, I still remember it like it was yesterday, that time when my dad kidnapped a random guy from the street and multiplied his balls while melting different parts of his brain through a chemical potion. You towards! What the heck are you showing your kids, if it was the typical giving authority to your kids to use life like a trash, it would be fine but allowing kids to see stuff like this. Are you trying to me into a psychopath! I feel pity for my future siblings. But hey, I can somehow work with that, as one of my Authors ability is changing the development of a character around so I can assure myself to not go down whatever abomination my parents wants me to go through. The real problem is my neighbor. Around 2 kilometres west from my room is another huge mansion, and in that mansion lives my greatest fear, the protagonist. As an Author, I am sensitive to Authatality skills and ability being use and right behind that protagonist is what everyone knows and is used to seeing. It''s plot armor. Just like Qi or Ki cultivation, Authatality also has a ranking in terms of power. There are 10 realms and in a realm holds 3 tiers which are low, middle and peak, in the tiers are 10 levels to go through before moving to the next tier. If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. To increase your ranking, you need experiences, after writing and reading an innumerable amount of stories, gaining experiences which can then evolve into insights which can then give you huge breakthroughs which are called enlightenments. Through this way do you broaden your senses and ways of thinking which can increase your ranking, now I know what your asking. What rank am I? *puffs out developing chest* I am a proud rank 1 tier peak level 7!!! (readers - that''s low.) You guys! Do you understand what that means?! The first head of the Yuimi family uses over 100 quintillion years to get to the 10th rank and uses 30 years to get to where I am! Where I myself got here in only 20 years(including my new life''s years). That''s ten years before the first head. Now do you understand how awesome I am! Praise me more, praise me more! Is definitely what I want to say IF I''m not bothered by such an annoying problem. Every realm gives you 10 more percent in using plot armor and plot sword, right now I can use 19.7% out of 100% plot armor and plot sword BUT the plot armor use to back the protagonist is over 30%! I can''t do anything! Now you might be wondering what the actual problem might be? Let me tell you about a law, the law of Authatality that was set by the very first Author to ascend into True Authatality. "Authatality is not a game, it is a battlefield, every single Authors are enemy''s and NO GOD SHALL CHANGE THAT!!!" Is what the first Author said, oh and if you didn''t know, that person was the first head of our clan so yeah. Well even if he did say that, there were many Authors that teamed up and created factions but even with that done, the law is still outstandingly healthy, please go die already. So it''s like an all out survival game, if the Author supporting that protagonist finds out I''m an Author, I''m literally dead. And so is the problem, me a mere Author who can only use 19.7% plot armor and sword wants to face an Author who I can use over 30% of his plot armour and sword. Bullsh*t That''s just SUICIDE! I will have to be careful when hiding my ability, or else, I might have to walk through deaths door another time. Well, enough with the thinking for now, let''s just read today''s Yuxiaworlds update. Summoning my internet book using my Author ability, I read away. - Author. Hello everyone, Yuimi here, I''ll be honest with you all, I''m actually only doing this for fun. Well 90% fun cuz the 10% uis my motivation to improve my writing skill, I''m proud of my story creating skill but again I''ll be honest, plot skill, development skill to stuff like organising where goes where, I am an amateur. That''s why, I will welcome insults and negative comments, I am new to doing stuff like this so YOROSHIKU NEGAI SHIMASU. Plz teach me! Also I''ll be doing a mass update, AKA 3 chapters in one update till chapter 10 so plz bear with me, now PLZ DON''T HIT, ILL GO CLEAN PROLOGUE SAN RIGHT NOW!!! The calm before the storm. Author chan and her life of misfortune! Chapter 2 Finishing the last couple words of I shall seal the hell chapter 223, I close my book and made it disappear using my Author ability. I got up and look at myself in the mirror. Reflected on the mirror was a gorgeous looking young girl that''s seems to be around 4 to 5 years old. With a long jade-like black hair reaching down her hips, couple with her undeveloped yet exquisite and slim body. A small pecky nose and small ruby like lips and the golden eye trait she got from her mother, she looks like the child of the goddess of beauty herself. I stare at the figure reflected on the mirror for a couple of breaths before turning to look away, ''this is bad, I might become a narcissist, let''s hope, I don''t ''k''.'' Switching back from my trance, I walk through the door only to be greeted by a familiar figure. Andalia, my personal maid in charge of doing whatever problems of my that occurs. With a rare blue hair trait that comes only from the east, her outstanding figure that was supported by her elegant skills of etiquette. She''s literally a western Yamato Nadeshiko. Walking pass her without batting an eye, I walk through many corridors many corridors with Andalia following behind my back, there was an awkward but understandable silence between us whilst we walk. You readers might be thinking, I''m cold but Andalia knows this is a way of giving her respect instead of insulting her. The Yu Ultio house is very strict when it comes to rules, if I say anything casually and be nice to literally anyone of lower standing, it will only lead to their deaths and noting good will come out at all so please understand, it''s definitely not like I don''t want to developed her character because I''m lazy at all ''k''! After a time used to light a candle, I arrive at a seemingly wide courtyard at the back of the house. It is one of my everyday routine. Swordsmen training. As the very first child of a duke, it is no surprise that I''m chosen as a successor, meaning as the successor of a very flourishing household. I require the skill and knowledge of many subjects such as the language and how to write to subjects like math and physical education also known as swordsmanship. After many sessions of begging my parents, I was left out in the complications known as politics, now don''t take me wrong, I''m actually interested in politics by far as I redd many novels base on politics and ways to climb the ladder of status. But having my interest and me actually wanting to do it is two different things, i do not want to mess with politics YET. It is a ''yet'' because as an Authatality practitioner, a politics base novel is a must have if I want to ascend into true Authatality. It''s definitely not because I don''t know anything about politics at all in real life that I can''t write about one ''k''! * tsun* After many hours of training(Toture), I proceed onto my many other subjects, starting from writing/reading and maths to learning the landscape of this planet, finally ending it with dad teaching me technology. Here comes another info dump so get ready. This world is called Ealu, the world is known to only have 2 continent which is the human continent '' Hu '' and the Elven continent which is called '' El ''. But through my dads complicating machines, he was able to recognise 9 more continents out there in the world, as for information, there is still none. Ok I''ll be honest, it actually has a way longer name but I shortened it for you, I know you readers hate geography so praise me for that plz. Anyways. After finishing all those annoying works, Andalia went to the kitchen and got me my dinner. After that unsatisfying meal, it''s playtime! Enjoying this book? Seek out the original to ensure the author gets credit. Coming back to my room, I get ready for bed(fun-time) by having Andalia change my clothes and clean my bed. I got into my bed and after she left, I waited for around an hour or so before getting back up. Hehe! Clicking on a secret button. I took out from the secret tray my 1st product that I created. A Camera! No not a peeking camera, I''m not a pervert. . . . . . . . . Actually now that I think about it, it is kind of a peeking camera. I planned on using this to peak onto the protagonists life, seeing if I could catch any weakness that protagonist kun''s plot amour has so I can breach it while also looking for any signs of the Author. Ever heard of the phrase, instead of wasting energy to fight the soliders, kill the enemy general right from the start to win it easy. Well of course you haven''t cuz I just made it up. Assassinating the Author is the best way off ok, and one of the purpose of this camera is find him understood. It''s not like I used this to peak at my parents S&M play ok! *tsun* Weeeelllll, I haven''t really actually met the protagonist yet, but judging from my sensing ability, he''s one of those right, those ''umm'' harem protagonists. Well harem protagonist or not, he''s my enemy that''s all that matters. Moving away from that subject, I actually do have a backup plan to go by. That time right after I died, i was talking with goddess of truck chan about my reincarnation. She had me go through a game of rolling wheel by having me roll a deciding wheel to choose my reincarnation advantage prize and also my disadvantage. My reincarnation advantage was a card allowing me to use an 80% plot sword once and my disadvantage was to have my pain sensor remove from my soul. Advantage is great but the disadvantage, I don''t even know. How is getting my pain sensor remove, a disadvantage? I kinda understand that it hinders my reaction time but it''s still an advantage to me, oh well. While I was thinking of all sorts of things. I was organising the camera pieces and making sure it works. After doing so, I remember one of the Yuimi family''s Authors ability. ''Hiding from the Heavens''. It''s a simple but very efficient ability to hide the presence of my Authors ability, none below the 4th rank should be able to sense it, an OP ability but at my hands, the possibility of making a mistake is big. Very big. Clicking the button on the top of the camera, I activated the camera''s camouflage ability and after 1 breath of my lungs, the space around the camera started flicking as the lights surrounding the camera started dimming with vigour and after another breath, the camera disappeared. The camera''s special ability. Camouflage can manipulate the light around the camera to not deflect off the camera making it invisible. I also gave it my 19.7% plot armour for extra insurance. Time to start operation. ''Sir, I''ve finished the management of peaking camera version 65. I repeat, I''ve finished the management of peaking camera version 65.''- Illyas ''COMMENCE OPERATION PROTAGONIST PEEKING, START!''- Imaginary Commander - Author Ok I lied, I''m sorry, I didn''t do that mass release like I said. Sorry! PLZ don''t shoot me those glares! *sob* Anyways, next chapter is the fun chapter that you''ll be looking forward, I''ll make it long, like really long. Also don''t worry about the Action and Martial Arts cuz it''s coming up so don''t worry. -Yuimi. Original Script, Teaser Prologue is out for the public. Teaser Prologue "Mama!!" "Mama!!" - ***** "Yes, *****?"- Mama "Wreed mii fwuat swtoory pvvz!(read me that story please)" - ***** "You mean the legend of our clan''s first patriarch, our great great great great great grandfather?" - Mama "Wyesssss!(yessss)" - ***** "Again?!" "*sign* oh well, one last time ok?" - Mama "Wyesssss!" - ***** . . . . . . . . . . . . . Once upon a time, in ancient China, there was a man name oppaimaster24. He was a poor and ugly pantsu sniffer who steals the pantsu of big oppai womens and sniff them all day before returning them back to their owners. One day, after he finish stealing some food from homeless-dog1668, he was walking in the alleyway while looking at the many beautiful women''s walking on the streets, drooling and full of lust in his eyes, he suddenly heard a *shii* sound. Looking down he saw a weird looking long cup with a round round circular bottom, picking it up he saw the word ''Sexacalibur Ver''s X, created by the first lolicon to obtain true immortality and creates his true path, he called it, LOLITALITY. Written as sexa because my mom would kill me if I remove the ''a''.'' What the sh*t is this. Sexacalibur? Ver''s X? LOLITALITY? I like mature women with big oppai''s! Not LOLI! ''THAT''S IMMORAL. Are you an idiot? Ohh I like idiots, idiots are good, idiots are great. Ehhh, why haven''t you started liking loli''s yet? Are you actually and idiot? Why do you have to be my succesor. Ehhh!'' If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it. Ehh Who? Who is it!!?? ''Don''t worry kid, I''ll push you into the right path, liking mature women with big oppai is evil! It''s immoral, I will make sure you know what justice truly means!'' Before he say anything, the weird cup in his hand flew into the air and at a speed faster then even light, flew at his pen*s. Sticking into his pen*s perfectly as it miraculously sticks up like a true sexacalibur. He fainted. ................. "Nee! Nee! Nee! Fwat hwappen aaffata tat?"- ***** " Well after that our first patriarch then had his evilness called big oppai obsession cleanse from him and became a true lolicon which then lead him to doing many heroic deeds such as raping over 100,000,000 loli''s under the heavens or killing a non mature loli dragon by raping her with his true sexacalibur for over 30 days without stoping. He truly is our family''s greatest hero-, no, the worlds greatest hero to ever exist!!!!"-Mama "Ywayy!!! Mama, I wuant to bwe wlikke hwim!(Yayy!!! Mama, I want to be like him!)- ***** "Yes! Now that''s the spirit, but before you become like him, why don''t you go to bed first then start your adventurer tomorrow?"- Mama "Ywayy! Gwood Nyight!"(Yay! Good Night!) - ***** "Good night!"- Mama Never would they know that a sweating Papa is right outside the room. - The End True Teaser and Also IMPORTANT MESSAGE!!! True Teaser Hello my name is ***** , you can call me Author-Chan as this is my book after all. Anyways. . . . . . . ''Ah'' how do I start this, Ok let me tell you my backstory first off so no complains please . I started my life as your everyday normal girl with above average looks, other then my jade like black hair, there is literally noting special about me. Until I found out about Authors. That one day, at school, I was in IT finishing off some important works in English class, after working out some hard questions and writing my due essay, I wondered the Internet around for some interesting stuff and after some browsing, i found it. LOLI NEKO!!! I was browsing through forums in rebbit and clicked on a post that piqued my interest, if my memories serves me correctly, it said something about a mass gathering of LN and CN Writers, editors and MTLers celebrating the world wide Light Novel and Chinese Novel collaboration anniversary. But what interested me wasn''t the event but was actually the title. No it was more of a word in the title, and the word was loli. Ya see, the title was something like ''LN/CN EVENT DISCUSSION! THIS YEARS TOPIC ARE FETISHES, COME AND TELL ME YO FETISHES YA PIG LOLI. Well up to this day, I still didn''t understood what the topic creator was talking about completely, I thought it was something about attracting those fat and piglike otaku''s or neets into the discussion but I''m still not 100% sure. *clears throat* Anyways, at that time, I didn''t notice the whole sentence but the two words ''pig loli'', I was pretty hungry for lollies back then and the thought of sweet pork flavour lollies got my interested by far, now that I think about it, I think I had some Sweet pork BBQ style the day before that time didn''t I? I think so, no confirms. Anyways again, I clicked on the word ''loli'' only to be immensely shock of what lies in that treasure trove. With milky jade like skin that seems so smooth, it was ethereally beautiful couple with that outstanding roll plump face that exist hints of fat making her look cute enough for even heaven to refuse to have her because they''re unworthy. That small peck nose and ruby coloured lips being the years most fitting couple, that golden orange crystal like pupil belonging only in that round and exquisite eyelid, being the loneliest but most beautiful. Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation. Going down a bit, her undeveloped and childish figure yet when compared to others of the same age group, she''s like a goddess of beauty, her slim loli legs and her small butt. She was . . . . . . . . . . . . . My gate to true life! ...... Since that day, just like a wild animal, from an everyday normal school girl, I become the Goddess of Madness, my cravings for loli''s became even more reveal as I dive into the world of anime, manga''s and light novel. Coming in like a storm, I watch, wrote and read. Eventually becoming an Author with many different published works. And finally the legend is about to be turn into a myth as I, will finally ascend! My original cravings will finally be fulfil as I will become a True Lolitality Author! I finally know how the great first patriarch feel, thank you for being my idol. Be Aware. Mr World of Gods and Authors as I, Illyas Yuimi, Successor of my families lolitality''s blood of the ancients will become your storm and forever shall I never extinguish. - Author (PLZ READ) I''ll tell you guys a secret and the secret is that this is actually my original script planned out for my story, no kidding, but my mood went twist and turn which gave birth to the first 2 chapter. I will continue doing this and also the other one but the reason why I put it in as teaser is that sadly, I''m going on a hiatus, however don''t fret as I will continue writing in my hiatus time, it''s just that, I can''t post it as I have some life''s problem that will not be shared, so right when I''m back is when you be enjoying masses of releases. Thank you - Yuimi.