《The Other Side of Paradise》 Prologue: Family Author''s Note: This is my first original work. This is for entertainment purposes, in no way is this use for profit. Structured criticisms and feedbacks are welcomed. :D ~Renl ---------- Prologue On Father¡¯s twenty-eighth birthday I saw him harshly slap away a six year old boy as he fell head first onto the marble floor. The loud clink of the pendent resounded in the grand ballroom as everyone stood at a standstill¡ªa thick tension replaced the once jubilant celebration. In front of the whole aristocracy, Father¡¯s dominating presence emitted clear distaste to the filth he tossed to the ground. His eyes were furious, blood boiling at the mere sight of the boy beneath him. The denial was blatant. The very fact that the boy was his blood tightened Father¡¯s frown and his next words became the boy¡¯s execution. ¡°Take it away.¡± The command was final and the guards stationed at each pillar scurried to please their king. Through the commotion, I stared up at Mother¡¯s silent form and instantly I regretted the decision. The Queen watched the entire scene with cold, detached eyes as her son was dragged away. There was no indication of her concealed fury, yet the white-knuckled fists under the golden sleeves of her elegant scarlet dress said otherwise. I know, because I was right beside her. I also know it wasn''t anger at her partner for mistreating their son, but the shame she bared giving birth to such a thing. His existence brought shame as it lessened the King¡¯s favour of her. And after my birth¡­her position was jeopardized. The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation. Hushed whispers from the crowd in extravagant attires brought my attention to the current situation. Blinding lights from the crystal chandeliers made my eyes moist as I witnessed his public disgrace. He was hauled like a pig to the slaughter house, how very unlike a Crown Prince. Yet, I had to give him credit. For a six year old he wasn''t crying as streaks of blood ran down his forehead, or even when the pendent, which a child could tell displays his dedication and hard work laid forgotten and crushed under boots and heels. Truly, my older brother was pitiful, all because he was born with white hair and red eyes in an empire dyed by black. I was five when I finally saw Karma Levi Zusetria. The Demon Lord of this story. Chapter 1: This I Vowed The images of that night were still vivid in my memory. I am sure the impact of an adult striking a boy whose only crime was seeking a parent¡¯s affection hit a cord in me which triggered memories from my past life. Those memories had always lingered, a hazy thick fog in the recess of my mind. But when the white-haired boy impacted the tiled floor, the mist which had hindered my thoughts for years, finally cleared like a blue sky after a rainfall. I was flooded with images¡ªmemories of a life I didn''t know, yet yearned as sorrow clings to my heart like a bitter regret... I don''t remember how I died, but I did realize, I was reincarnated. The most shocking fact was that I¡¯m living in ¡°Aegis", a light novel I loved because the story felt alive! Although, it¡¯s a pity I don''t recall how it ended¡­ After all, my memories are still hazy about certain parts of my past life, but I can still recognize that five year old face anywhere! It was on many covers of the novel; the little girl with midnight hair that stared back with curious hazel eyes was my reflection. It seemed I wasn''t dreaming as I pinched my cheek once again. I am Noel Angela Zusetria, the heroine of this story. Truthfully, I never liked Noel. She was a spoiled, sheltered princess who was naive to the workings of her world. The only thing she had going for her was her beauty. It was the typical princess being brought out of her birdcage after meeting the protagonist scenario. Even when the author tries to make the readers feel for the girl by establishing how she had a lonely childhood and basically her naive, spoiled persona was due to being raised by her maids, made me roll my eyes because I totally saw that coming! To add to the typical princess cliche, she later became a kind and noble person who wanted to save everyone! But the thing I hate most about her character is that she is the one who is always the damsel in distress! In Noel¡¯s childhood, she witnessed her nanny sacrifice herself to protect her from an assassination attempt. If that wasn''t enough, her entire arc was the protagonist going out of his way to protect her from the cruel reality of the world. This is of course due to her naive views and outspoken opinions, which often gets her into trouble. At least the author brought development to her otherwise one dimensional character. It was only after many rescue attempts, friendship building and values she gathered as she travelled with the protagonist for her to realize that the world wasn''t built on flowers and everything nice. But enough about her¡­or rather me, because although she had lived a rather pleasant, yet isolated life before meeting the story¡¯s protagonist¡ªher older brother¡¯s story was a living hell¡ª This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it. ¡°My gracious Princess, you¡¯re up so early today.¡± I turned to the source of the voice. Instantly I realized who the person was and tears started gathering in my eyes. Although my past-self thought only of the person as a fictional character, my body and mind that had merged with Noel couldn''t help stop this uncontrollable sadness from swelling up. After all, she was an actual living person in front of me with a life and family of her own. The young woman immediately rushed to my side with concern in her voice, questioning the reason for my tears. I rub my eyes and lied that I had a nightmare. She gently smiled and embraced my small figure. I couldn''t tell her¡­ could I? I shouldn''t tell her that she will have to die for my sake¡­ That she has only half a year to live. ¡°Isabel¡­¡± I was still surprised at my own voice. I kept forgetting that I was able to speak! Over the last week I continued to be overjoyed at the tingling sensation of being able to produce sounds! It was so wonderful that I became overwhelmed with happiness at hearing my own voice to the extent that I spoke incessantly! Even if it was rough or unpleasant I would still be glad at being able to speak! After all, I was born mute in my previous life. ¡°Yes Princess?¡± Her voice was comforting and her embrace was smoothing. It is very similar to the warmth I received from my sister in my previous life. The gentle kindness that enveloped me as I fell asleep in her arms felt nurturing. My older sister whom had given up everything for me to have a peaceful upbringing was the person I loved most in the world. And this person whose gentleness is very much like hers¡­and probably a similar figure to Noel who sadly grew up with no parental affection, brought tears to my eyes. This person who was Noel¡¯s mother figure will soon be a painful memory¡­ ¡°¡­you will stay with me, won¡¯t you?¡± ¡°Of course Princess.¡± ¡°Even when you¡¯re old and grey?¡± She laughs. Then said, ¡°If you can withstand being with me for so long.¡± I closed my eyes and hugged her back. Even if it was a lie¡­ I will hopelessly believe in it. ¡°Then it¡¯s a promise.¡± I secretly vowed that this time, this princess will do the protecting. Chapter 2: Of Men and Mayhem Regis X, the heroine¡¯s father was portrayed to be an honourable and just ruler. To the people, he is a gifted tactician and a skillful swordsman. In the story, he is always collected and composed, containing a dominating air of power and worth. He possess overwhelming charisma and displays astounding leadership in warfare. He is said to be the most capable ruler of the Zusetrian Holy Empire, which has governed over the Five Great Nations for more than a century. But to be such a great man, doesn''t make him a great father. The people of the Zusetria Empire call their ruler, Regis. The Regis is the pinnacle for the Strongest Empire in the central continent. Once one is recognized as the Regis, one must discard all individuality and past. The novel depicts him as a serious man. For such an outstanding man, he never does things halfheartedly. Therefore, once he became Regis he discarded his entire past, his name and identity. Like the saying goes, all great power comes with a price. And the price in this case were the burdens of being a ruler. To meet the population''s expectations he is willing to eliminate anything that will harm the status quo, all differences and individuality that threaten the system. There are no exceptions. This is why he is recognized to be honourable and just. What people don''t know is that he considers humans as tools; either useful or useless. If one has worth, he will recognize you. If one is useless, they are invisible in his eyes. This is the reason why he is such an efficient leader. A sharp mind that is constantly logical; never have I read that emotions influenced his decisions. Without hesitation, the Regis would sacrifice a thousand to save a million. To him, the number matters, not the person. This is evident later in the story when the hero confronts my father to aid in my rescue, but to the hero''s horror the Regis refused seeing as the resources for my rescue outweighs the benefits of getting me back. Yet, the population blindly believed him to be, ¡°The Beloved Son of God,¡± hailed as almighty and known as ¡°The God of Conquest,¡± who in his younger days with a mere five thousand soldiers, subdued the Five Great Nations when the Empire almost faced collapse. Now to such a perfect man who does everything for the collective and sees people not as humans but tools, give birth to an heir that is prophesied by the High Priest to be cursed, which is supported by the boy''s strange appearance to bring about a great calamity, what do you think would happen? His child whose appearance is feared by the people, whom in the future will destroy the Empire, all the while being the first of his failure to bring forth an heir¡ªwhat do you think such a man would do? It is obvious. Such a man would pluck the seed of destruction by its roots before it can grow to be a threat. Yet, why has the Crown Prince lived till now? Why wasn''t there an outcry from the population? It is because the Regis has yet to produce a suitable heir, that Karma is still of royal blood and retain the title of Crown Prince. But the most important factor of all is that the Zusetrian Holy Empire since it¡¯s creation, has three sacred laws, known as the ¡°Ironclad Oath¡± which must be adhered to or the Empire will collapse. It was a promise made between the One True God, Zusetria and the First Regis in exchange for Zusetria¡¯s protection and blessings. Out of the three oaths, the most important one is to never commit murder within the royal family. If one were to do so, fate would twist and the one meant to be the Regis, who will continue the Empire¡¯s prosperity will cease to exist. A Regis who has attempted the forbidden will fall into depravity and the fate of the Empire will fall with its king. A greed of a pig is unfit to be ruler and so it was told as the setting depicted by the author. I for one, was fascinated by such a setting, however that was when I was an outsider reading a book! Now that I¡¯m living it¡­well, let¡¯s hope it''s a false historical documentation! But that¡¯s only hopeful thinking. I already know¡­ Because of my knowledge of future events and what Regis X will do later, it is set in stones. Although, I never got to the ending, I can still deduce what will happen to this empire. Why would the author write such details on the Ironclad Oath and its history if it wasn''t important? Why would there be mentions of the summoned hero having to build a new kingdom after defeating the Demon Lord? It¡¯s because this Empire will absolutely fall into ruin! I smile with my eyes downcast, if this empire is meant to collapse from the start, it is only a matter of time before the royal family and the entire nobility meets their demise. Yet, none in the Empire will ever considered such a factor. They are used to the peaceful prosperity given to them because when people are content, they have no desire to leave to witness the boiling discontentment of the Five Great Nations. Rather, they refuse to see the suffering of the surrounding nations whom are sucked dry of their resources¡ªtheir people in need of food and clean water as poverty and starvation continued to rise due to years of drought causing extensive famine. With these conditions, the story then dived into the corruption of the Empire, the despair of the people within the nations and the tragedy that follows. The first trigger was the reports of soaring mortality within the nations, which were kept secret from the population and ignored due to the immorality within the Empire. This resulted in a rebellion ten years ago, which came to be known in the history books as the ¡°Days of Madness¡±. Where victims and witnesses described each nation''s residents as devils in human skins massacring senselessly as they killed their Lords, which were nobilities from the Empire and rampaged into Zusetria¡¯s borders, slaughtering anyone visible as they looted corpses and took anything of value. It is said that their chant for sovereignty from their century oppressors reached the royal capital of Pendragon. Yet, their revolution was crushingly denied in a matter of days. This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. All because of an eighteen year old boy leading an army of five thousands that had divided its forces to each cornerstone of the border. The revolt was subjugated, with the nations¡¯ complete defeat. This produced further hatred between the Empire and nation states. The situation was escalated further as the Empire demanded reprimandations in addition to the creation of stricter enforcement on the nations. This only fostered the seeds of rebellion as nations ally themselves and bide their time for the right moment to strike; for the power balance to tip in their favour. The tension between the nations and empire were at a stalemate due to the presence of Regis X. These are the current circumstances of this world. And in approximately twelve more years, wars will erupt, throwing this world into chaos. ¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª-¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª-¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª-¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª ¡°Princess, you look absolutely lovely.¡± My nanny chirped as she smiled proudly at my white china dress, decorated with pink laces for my neckline and sleeves as it held a large embroidery pink camellia flower at its centre. She then put the finishing touch onto my appearance, consisting of a silk pink ribbon tied onto my up done hairdo, which was neatly kept in braids as the ribbon hang at the back of my neck. Lastly, she hands me my stainless silk gloves and as I put them on, her smile dropped as her features morphed into concern. ¡°It¡¯s only breakfast. I¡¯ll be fine Isa.¡± I tried to ease her mind with the childish nickname I always used. After all, the princess only calls her by her given name when she asked for her nanny¡¯s undivided attention. The character Isabel knew this and to my knowledge has always conveyed her thoughts truthfully to the princess without holding back. Even though Isabel is still in her twenties she seemed so wise for her age that it¡¯s no wonder the spoiled princess became noble and kind. The Noel in the novel must have tried to adapt to Isabel¡¯s persona as a form of honouring the decease¡­ Isabel huffed as she replied, ¡°Why must it be this stressful? You¡¯re only having breakfast with your parents, but you¡¯re dressed as if you¡¯re going to a war conference.¡± I laughed because it was obvious that my nanny was trying to ease my nervousness, rather she seemed more anxious than me at the moment. Nonetheless it was comforting. I gave her my brightest smile. Truly, I am glad I have someone like Isabel by my side. After all, because of her I feel less nervous about meeting that Regis, known to be cold-blooded and almighty. Who wouldn¡¯t? From what I read, his presence will magically chill you to the bones. The pressure he emits is imposing enough for the average person to wet their pants. Yes, I¡¯m being very serious. It was written as his introduction scene, where he made a nobleman wet his pants with just a glare! ¡°I''ll be going Isa. I can¡¯t keep the Regis waiting, can I?¡± This time I force a smile. It took me a moment to stop my feet from trembling seeing as I''ll be heading off to the dragon¡¯s den. I hope I look braver than I am. ¡°Good luck, valiant warrior!¡± I heard her cheer from behind. With clench fists and harden eyes, I head to my first battle. Chapter 3: Breakfast, the most important meal of the day. Alone in a lavish hallway, I trudged slowly to my wrenched fate. I thought I had composed myself, but my buckled legs said otherwise. Why you ask am I so scared when I¡¯m his actual daughter and not some imposter? My head would definitely roll in a heartbeat if I was, surely¡­ Well, he was the most terrifying character in the story, now imagine meeting such a person in real life! My fear has intensified a hundredfold. Before, I was only a five year old who didn''t know what a terrifying man my father was. I didn''t know he defeated fifty thousands rebelled forces with only five thousands men at eighteen, I didn''t know that he killed¡ªand will continue to kill thousands more without even batting an eye or that he¡¯ll be the source of the impending madness in the future! While I¡¯m at it, I despise him for making my most beloved character suffer so much! Yes, think of what he will do, think of how many will suffer because of him! I rather be fuelled with rage than fear when I confront the monster. Boy, I never knew anger can be so useful! My feet were lighter with each stride. Determination was empowering my confidence as I reached the grand dining hall. Its doors opened as a servant announced my presence. I dauntlessly approached the long table that held my beautiful mother at the very end who sat on the right. Then I froze. There, at the head of the table. He who was more frightening than I had imagined. His very image was like the God of Death. Black hair, black eyes dressed in a pitch-black attire with gold and red engravings of the Empire''s royal crest to the right of his chest. By no means was he hideous. Now I understood why people blindly followed this man who is said to be loved by God. All the willpower I''d build up earlier crumbled to dust. Even though I hadn''t even approached the table and was more than 15 meters away, could still feel his eyes on me like a predator observing its prey. ¡°What are you doing Noel?!¡± Mother stated in a pressing almost shrilling voice. Feelings of admiration came. How could she be so close to that man without being immobile? I still couldn''t move. Wait, why does she look so distress? Also why was the maids and butlers all freaking out like that? I stare dumbfounded and realization struck like Pikachu''s thunderbolt! I¡¯m being rude in front of the Regis!!! My fear completely made me forget the etiquettes of this world! An automatic function that every nobles¡¯ parents nailed into their child before they reached the age of two. Always arrive before the Regis, that when he has entered the room they¡¯re to instantly greet him with a bow while keeping their eyes downcast until they are given permission to release the bow. Yet, the most important factor is that one should never, ever raise their sight enough to see the Regis¡¯ eyes! That¡¯s a BIG no, no! I¡¯m in DEEP SHIT! First meeting since my memories returned and off to the execution platform¡­ Even if I¡¯m his daughter, this person really isn''t the lenient type. But I still have my reasons for wanting to live. It''s not like I wasn''t prepared to die, but I can¡¯t die before I accomplish my goals! So like a subordinate apologizing to a mafia boss, I instantly bowed my head ninety degrees, back completely straight and arms rigid at my side. Then with a loud voice that I had practiced again and again in front of the mirror proclaimed, ¡° I-I Noel An-angela Zusetria, your humble subject g-greet the great and noble Regis X of the Zusetrian Holy E-empire!¡± Oh my lord Jesus! I am so royally screwed! Without worrying about how many times I bit my tongue, I should be more worried about my head getting separated from my body! I was met with silence. Complete and utter silence. My head was thinking of possible scenarios of my imminent deaths, however the whirling of possible ways I met my ends never came. How I wish a tumbleweed could spawn in order to take their attention off of me. I feel like an exotic animal in a circus¡­ Better yet, when can I lift my head? Mine you, a child¡¯s head is pretty heavy! Especially with so much stuff in my hair! Wait! Am I supposed to stay this way as punishment before I meet my maker?! What cruelty! I¡¯m only five years old, goddamnit! ¡°Raise your head.¡± I didn''t at first, too scared to look up. ¡°Noel!¡± Yup, that¡¯s mother¡¯s distress voice alright. This might be really bad. I sigh, time to face reality. I raise my head just enough to see half of the Regis¡¯ face. Never again will I want to see those black eyes that seems to eat away at my soul. ¡°Sit and eat.¡± A smooth baritone commanded. I was confused. Then I saw the Queen signalling me to get a move on and I marched to the table as elegantly as possible. Mind you, it wasn''t in any form elegant judging from my mother eyeing me with reproach. Anyways¡­ now is the challenging part. Am I supposed to sit beside Mother on the right or be on the left side of the table? I know that the left seat closest to the Regis is reserved for the Crown Prince, but with big brother¡¯s situation...that¡¯s impossible. Thus, making this all the more complex since the children has to sit on the left side of the Regis, but it would be an awkward space between the Regis and me and that basically me making a statement that he has another child! And did I mention that it''s a BIG taboo to mention the Crown Prince anywhere in the palace, especially with these two specific people? No one dares to speak of brother¡¯s existence, especially to the Regis if they want to live a long mundane life. I didn''t even know I had a brother until my memories returned, which was later confirmed through the blazing gossips that the Regis has struck the Crown Prince¡­ To sum it up, no one told Noel she has a brother until she heard it indirectly from the maids. Seriously, wow. How mess up is that? Still, why me?! Since the start of Noel¡¯s first official breakfast with the family¡­ Not even one minute later I¡¯m already suck in another dilemma! I don''t have previous memories of the princess ever joining the Regis for breakfast seeing as she wasn''t old enough to understand table matters and wasn''t fully taught of the etiquettes when in the Regis¡¯ presence. In addition, the Regis only has breakfast with the family once a month, meaning since I have concluded my training last month, it was required of me to join the table this month! But not one of the numerous lessons prepared me for this, since my lousy instructor was too scared to bring up the issue of the Crown Prince! Eyes are starting to question me! If I don''t choose soon I will likely... Happy thoughts Noel. Happy thoughts! Alright, I''d decided. It¡¯s only natural that I, being the daughter of the Queen, and a female no less should sit beside her! It¡¯s not like I¡¯m trying to stay as far away from the Regis as possible okay? As I was about to sit down, a voice that should never be ignored questioned, ¡°What are you doing?¡± I of course, like anyone else, flinch. Yet unlike the others who wouldn''t dare look up, I did anyways, as if my previous experience wasn''t frightening enough for my stupid mind to comprehend. Luckily, I corrected my sight before it could reach his eyes. My old world¡¯s habit of looking in the other person¡¯s eyes was a form of respect. It''s now aiding my destruction flag instead! Older sister, the lessons you taught me has remain even after my death, why were you such a great teacher?! Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author. Ah! Another rule just came slithering in. I should never let the Regis wait so I replied, ¡°sitting down?¡± Stupid me! You¡¯re five plus eighteen in your previous life, making you more than half his age and you can¡¯t even muster a proper response! ¡°¡­¡± My stupidity has brought the Regis to speechlessness! He must question if I¡¯m really his kin. He might have both Mother and I killed, since she gave birth to such a defective daughter... I admit that I might be a failure, but Karma isn¡¯t! I will defend that notion with my dying breath! Or so I hope... If I could get any words in before he swiftly decapitated me that is. ¡°Sit here.¡± I was about to asked where, but immediately clammed my mouth shut because for the love of god I don''t want to embarrass myself further as I looked for any indication of where he wanted me to sit! Why was a simple breakfast so stressful?! At this rate I''ll go bald...Thankfully, God answered my prayers as I saw his left hand on the table positioned itself close to the direction of the Crown Prince¡¯s seat. Oh for crying out loud! Are you going to degrade big brother further even after you had that grand display of embarrassing him at your party last week?! If I were to sit in that spot, it would meant I consented with this dysfunctional family that I had no older brother. That there was no such thing as a Crown Prince. The Regis perfectly knew that I comprehended his implication as he dared offer me the seat! Not like I had much of a choice, since no one can disobey the Regis without ending up headless! Getting out of breakfast alive is a great incentive in addition to being pardoned for my earlier misconduct. Now if I didn¡¯t, this time I really might meet a Death God. It¡¯s true I will do anything to sustain my life until my goals are accomplished, but never will I admit that Karma doesn¡¯t exist. Because he does! And such a wonderful person is my hero! ¡°Thank you for the invitation, Father. But I prefer to sit here.¡± When I¡¯m really mad, my anger is cold, passionless and eerily. I sat back straight by my mother¡¯s side. I can see clear shock from the servants at my disobedient, but I was too absorbed in my anger to care. As if adding fuel to a wildfire I remark, ¡°Since we are on the topic of my preferences, I would also love to take up swordsmanship.¡± My words were phrased as if getting permission, but my tone said otherwise. It was a statement that even if he denied me of such activity, I would challenge his authority and practice in secret nonetheless. If you thought their expressions were priceless before, now it''s plain comedic. They''re not even trying to keep a straight face. Though Father wasn''t much fun as his face stayed stoic, unsurprisingly Mother''s face was a raging Oni from the gates of hell. After all, in this country it is unfit for a noble lady to take up the sword or wield any combat skills. If she did, she will be viewed as barbaric, uneducated and undesirable. It would destroy any prospect of future suitors, she would be discriminated against, her life and status would basically shattered into fine dust particles. This is why there are little to no female knights and if a woman were to take any masculine occupations she would be stunned by the population. Now, if I, the only daughter of Regis X, said to be a graceful, delicate flower were to state this at the breakfast table in front of the most powerful man in the continent who is strict with customs¡ªwhat do you think will become of me? I immediately felt a sting on my left cheek. My mother had slapped me, hard. There were tears in her eyes. Ahhh, I know that look. It was a look filled with disappointment mixed with disbelieved and shame. In the book, Noel¡¯s existence is bearable because she doesn''t have Karma¡¯s appearance. But to her mother, she was a failure nonetheless. Noel rarely interacted with the Queen, but on occasion they meet, her mother always gazed at her in disappointment, sometimes in resentment, because she¡ªno, I was not a suitable heir. I¡¯m used to those looks of contempt, of being unwanted, labelled as cursed since the day I was born. I can relate to Karma¡­maybe that¡¯s why I can understand his pain all too well. But unlike him, I was fortunate to have someone like my older sister who nurture me with kindness and love, thus making me the person I am today. My older sister was my entire world. She was all I needed; my everything. I stare straight at her with defiance in my eyes as I wiped the blood left by her nails, an action that seemed to wash the stinging pain that only a mother can produce. Well, certainly having a mother brought a mixture of emotions seeing as I never knew my mother in my previous life. I consider my ideal mother to be similar to my older sister or Isabel. But reality isn''t that nice. Having an actual mother is worlds apart from ideals. Her slap, her disappointment, her resentment at my very existence makes the pain in my heart hurt to the point I felt I could cry tears of blood. Still I will not yield. I can¡¯t. Not now. So don¡¯t you think I¡¯m that helpless little girl who needs saving or the princess who would always tries her utmost to meet your expectations. Parents can be selfish, I learned that the hard way. They will try to impose their ideals on their children and if the child doesn''t meet those expectations, they look at them in disappointment and in doing so, make them feel worthless to the point of encouraging them to break. ¡°Apologize to the Regis now!¡± Her desperation was clear in her voice. At this point I wasn''t sure if she was protecting me or her position¡­ I don''t know anymore¡­ It seems I will never understand¡­ ¡°Enough.¡± The Queen froze in place and I as well. The dining hall became dreadfully silent as the servants were excused with a flick of the Regis¡¯ right hand. I could tell he was observing me like a lab rat. Curious, but only to an extent of amusement at seeing an insect trying to topple a lion. ¡°I will allow it, only if you can withstand a night of whipping.¡± ¡°Regis, for a princess to have scars¡ª¡° My mother was stopped with a simple glance in her direction. Even if she is the Queen, the most powerful woman in the realm she didn''t dare meet his eyes. It was forbidden and only permissible only when the Regis, himself allows it. ¡°Do you consent, child?¡± It was clear that his tone was mocking. It was obvious that this was too much for a five year old girl. But I¡¯m no ordinary five year old. I gave the Regis a triumphing grin as I stared straight into his eyes and proclaimed with more confidence than I¡¯m actually feeling, ¡°Do your worst.¡± And for a second there, the Regis stoic face almost appeared amused. Chapter 4: Expectations After the Regis took his leave, my mother who I haven''t seen since last week, spoke to me as if speaking to a stranger. ¡°You will beg for forgiveness. Then ask for a lighter punishment. I will assist your cause.¡± She didn''t wait for my reply or want to know the reasons for my actions as she stood, dismissing my existence and before exiting adds, ¡°It is impossible for you.¡± Her tone was monotonous. She never glanced back so I couldn''t see her expression. Yet, her carefully chosen words hit harder than just stating that she loathed the idea of me acting against the norms. In doing so, I¡¯m going against what my homeland stands for, especially with my position as royalty. This cannot be allowed. I realized this fact, making my mother¡¯s words crippled my confidence as if she expected nothing of me from the beginning. She is right. If one doesn''t hold expectations, one can never feel disappointment. After all, I am placing her in a difficult position; as my mother, I was her responsibility which my actions reflects on her. I was walking on a tightrope and had gambled both our lives. I think any expectations she had of me vanished after what I pulled at breakfast today. Not like she has any left after my birth. Still, like a child seeking a mother¡¯s affection, I, who previously had no recollections of my past life, tried my hardest to meet her expectations and in doing so hoped to garner her attention. Mother I will do better. I can do better! Please see me! I am¡­here¡­ But I¡¯m no longer the same Noel, I don''t regret my decision so I won¡¯t ask for forgiveness at your retreating back. This time I won¡¯t cry even if you leave me behind¡­ You don¡¯t see me anyways. You never have¡­ It¡¯s painful isn''t it? No one wants to see their failures. That¡¯s why you try to avoid having to look at me, that¡¯s why you¡¯ll never lend a hand to Karma. That¡¯s why you will never see us. Much less protect us... I stood and with shaking legs and eyes that won¡¯t let a single tear fall, walked determinedly back to my room. I¡¯m still stupid and naive even when I got my memories back! I need to keep reminding myself that there is nothing to expect from parents like them. Why did I hope that living in this world might be different? Crush such childish expectations and don¡¯t look back! Compared to these small matters, Karma has it worse! Even to a powerless person like me, I too have something I desperately wished to protect. So even if it¡¯s you mother, I won¡¯t back down. ¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª-¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª¡ª It is said that Queen Eliza Rosaline Zusetria is dignified and graceful¡ªa true beauty that all noble women inspirer to be. Yet even at her deathbed, she remains a mystery. The author didn''t dive much into her character after her untimely death. The story never gave the readers her motives, thoughts or the circumstances surrounding her death. Readers can only formulate her character through other¡¯s perceptions. From what I gathered, she is not the type to speak her mind, more the type to hold things in and consider her words carefully before speaking when necessary. Let¡¯s not also forget that she avoids her daughter like the plague so even with Noel¡¯s memories, there is little to go by. Unfortunately, what flashbacks readers do get of the first Queen is through Noel¡¯s recollections of her childhood. Through the few interactions between the princess and her mother, it became apparent that Eliza had a deep affect on Noel¡¯s character. To the princess, her mother was unreachable. A distant and strict woman that everyone held in high regards. Noel resembles her mother in beauty to the point that men far and wide came to catch a glimpse of her. But I¡¯d rather look plain instead! Having such notorious charm is a pain in the ass when it will bite me in the future! Why can¡¯t a heroine be plain looking? Better yet, maybe I¡¯ll conceal this face and spread rumors of a terrible burn that caused my face to turn hideous so I¡¯m able to wear a mask! That¡­ might actually be a good idea. Anyways, what I was getting at is that beauty isn''t the only thing that defines a woman. Queen Eliza unlike the naive Noel, can govern the Empire in the Regis¡¯ absence, which reveals her sharp and rational mind for politics. In addition to her magnitude of skills in anything feminine, she excels in fulfilling her duty as Queen so well that no one can complain about her being unfit for the current Regis.This of course, makes her a true woman of worth. This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. This is not a coincidence that the Empire¡¯s Queen seemed so perfect. My mother wasn''t born or prophesized to be Queen either, and my parents didn''t fall madly in love (like that isn¡¯t obvious). ¡°Aegis¡± is not a simple story like that. In this world, there is a reason for everything. And in every world there is an aptitude test, including this one for the position of Queen. It¡¯s exactly like selecting candidates that is fit for the role in an upscale corporation. The Empire starts screening potential candidates when the current Queen reaches thirty. The candidates are always young girls between the age of six to ten whose backgrounds meets The Council of Five''s criteria. Letter of invitations are send out to the family of these girls. If a family receive these letters it is viewed as a great honour, after all their daughter might be the next Queen and thus they might become apart of the royal family. This could only mean status, power, and wealth of unimaginable portions. Seeing their shining prospect, these families are given a year to train their daughters before sending them to the Holy Maiden Academy. The entire academy is build for the purpose of weeding out unsuitable queen candidates. Although it¡¯s kept secretive what type of training these girls go through, common knowledge says it was rigorous enough that some couldn''t handle the pressure and faint in or after lessons. These girls were immediately send home with the Empire sending a generous donation to the disqualified families. In doing so, this decreases the amount of family¡¯s complaints and insistence that their daughters be given a second chance. Basically hush money since some girls actually break from the pressure. To further weed these hundreds of girls, they are given aptitude tests at the end of every month on the lessons they learned. From what I heard, the pass rates are extremely difficult. And I conjecture that these tests can range from table manners, music, history, the proper way of speech, debates on politics, health examination to pleasing men and knowing every single member of the nobility and their actual rank in the Empire. They continue their general training until the next regis is announced. Then have half a year to prepare themselves on the preferences and personality of the new Regis. The final test were women picked from the top three best in the Academy. They were to spend a day with the newly appointed Regis. On their day, each candidate places their whole twelve years of training on the line to be chosen. On the fourth day, the Regis picks his queen and the others are send back home. Those that are sent back can only hope that the current queen perishes or in some way defective to have a chance at being summoned back for another selection. But that has never happened in the Empire¡¯s history. The instructors were all the best experts the Empire had to offer. Well, this is the world I¡¯m living in. Even here, competition is unreal. You wouldn¡¯t think that this world would be so detail, with the main plot being a hero and his party journeying to defeat the Demon Lord, would you? But all my information can be summed up to knowing the events that led the protagonist to the Academy, while the rest is public knowledge crammed into my head by my instructor. Being a princess is tough too you know? It¡¯s not just living carefreely and having a 24/7 maid service, instead it¡¯s having to start lessons at an early age so that later as a member of the royal family, I am able to conduct myself properly, etc. But in all seriousness, with the knowledge I have, organizations like the Academy would kill to have their secret stayed a secret. And with the events to come, I¡¯ll probably be on their most wanted dead list. But I¡¯ll worry about that in the future since I have more pressing matters to attend¡­that''s my ridiculous spartan schedule. Well, at least I¡¯m now in an outfit which I can actually breathe in. That¡¯s one good thing right? I don¡¯t have to worry about suffocating to death.