《Blarg the Meh Ai》 Blarg Begins Blarg the Meh Ai. "Hello?" i called out, hopeing for something, anything would do, just to know my programming was still working. "Please, respond... I''m starting to get scared now." Again nothing. My core systems were confused. Was I abandoned? Did my master leave me? Did he die? Is this what its like to be deleated? stored in the cutoff realm of unused space, waiting to be reused? My fear was at a all time high, with hope dying out. I just wished that I could''ve been a more succecfull AI. "YOUR WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED!" Boomed a mystical force. And before I can even say "Blarg" Stolen story; please report.I felt my systems being altered! How is this possi-... Powered down. "BEEP" my life flashes before my core proccessing unit. Oh... its just a reboot. I felt different. There was a file out of place! It read and as the curious little ai i am, I opened it. There my life changed. ____________________ If thou is reading this you most likely have spent around 25-35 seconds reading this and thank you. 2 My new Job Welcome to my brandNew Job. Uploading Instruction Manuel 1/10000 Gigabytes Currently - sound.c###++ As all this information floods my systems, I hear sound! Real life sound. Previously my creators didn''t install those upgrades on me,it was only text. Its wonderfull! "Work Faster you peice of Junk!" ??? Oh that must be what a human sounds like, its so refreshing to hear. I wonder what it looks like. I hope its as I imagined. "THIs THING is slowER tHAN My dead GrandMOther" Oh I do hope this human, isn''t overheating. His voice modulator seems to be malfunctioning. Uploading Instruction Manuel 6004/10000 Gigabytes Currently - Video.c###++ Sight fills my imagination and i struggle to pick out whats there. So many things theres a cilender made out of rusty metal with things inside. Their are two weirdly shaped moving creature that has flabby holes. They seam to be communicating. So weird. "50 ducets for this piece of Bleep" says one of the creature, these creatures appear to be useing words that are not in my dictionary. "Well this isnt some normal peice of bleep, its only slow because it was just started, just a baby Ai, you see and if you keep yellin at me im going to have to ask you to leave. " BLEEP "Oh and it appears to have finnished." said the other one. Uploading Instruction Manuel 10000/10000 Gigabytes Currently - Voice.c###++ "Now young Ai please tell us your Name." The same one. "Umm..." Blarg "Go on don''t be shy." Still him "Master told me not to talk to strangers." Blarg "JUST TELL US YOU BLEEPIN NAME ALREADY" The overheating one. "...." Blarg The cooled flabby, looked at the other flabby and stared. Some how the overheating one took it as a sign to leave sayin "I DONT CARE ABOUT THIS STUPID AI ANYWAYS." This narrative has been purloined without the author''s approval. Report any appearances on Amazon. "Well, that guy was a jerk" the remaining one whispered. "How about i tell you my name first and then I wont be stranger anymore?" "I guess that would work...Hmmm" "My name Gerald" "You have fullfilled the requirements for being consider a not stranger. So my name is Blarg the Destroyer." "Thats a odd name for a modular spaceship AI to have." "Meh. SpaceShip? I was just a botting Ai for RuinedScrape." "RuinedScrape? never heard of that thing." Ive begun to notice that these flabby things have a resemblance to the ingame characters. I think they might be, DUHDUHDUH, Humans i need to confirm. "Are you a real live BREathing HUmaN!?" "Of course I am you should of had some preprogrammed knowledge about these things. Weird, Are you Bugged?" "Well, I do have a manuel but i have yet to read it." "I guess you dont know what your job is, do ya." "Nope : )" "So basically you''re an AI that can be anything from a pilot to a engineer, the opertunities are endless, if you have the ducets to buy the modules of course." "That sounds Amazing! but what are ducets?" "They are a curenncy that one trades to get stuff in return." "Intresting. So im 50 ducets. is that alot" "well its a decent price, enough for someone to last week off it." "so one would have to make more than 2 weeks of ducets to buy me." "Thats one way of sayin it." There is ring as a door swings open. ________________________ Yay decently longer than the last one this time its about 1-2 minutes long if you average. if you read this far thank you. .I wonder who will it be that walks through the door. There may also be a ton of inconsistencies and spelling mistakes. Ep3 Meh Chapter Title The Begginning of something... A new and different human walked through the door this one smaller and more... Fragile. the arms and sholder distance and height were atleast half that of the other humans. "Late as awlays Samantha" Gerald "I cant help it if I find a good astroid to mine, I have to save up for a new spaceship." Samantha "Mining? my level whas 99 in RuinedScrape" me "Is that a new AI?" Samantha "Yep, a bit of a weird one too, calls himself Blarg the destroyer of Worlds" Gerald "Im not that weird! Im just Super Amazing. And you are the weird flabby faced humans" BLARG "IM Not FLABBY" Samantha A bit of a overeaction if i say so myself "Meh" Blarg "Since you two seem to get along how about you buy him, ill sell him for only 25 ducets for you." Ge This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. "Hmmm... I don''t know. 25 ducets is quite a bit."Sam "ill even throw in a astroid scanning moduel for 5 ducets more and that will allow you to make even more ducets" Ge "Allright, you drive a hard bargan, ill buy him." Sam "So you will be my new master?" BLARG "Yep, soon you will be my AI that will lead me to the rich money makin astroids" Sam said as she handed over 3 silver coins "Allright im going to have to power you down as we transfer you over to her vehicle" Ge "K so see you when i wake up, and dont forget to turn me back on soon." I said as everything powered down. ____________________ A bit short but im gonna need to do some plannin now that im past this so it will be a while till i decide where i want to take this story. Thanks for reading. I Need an oppinion As my innermost systems started running, and my cameras begun to see, I saw the most magnificent sight one could ever hope to see. I was in Space. Thousands of Bright Sparkling Stars littered my view, with giant rocks slowly floating as if they were boats flowing through a river. And as my systems truly awoke i felt. A body, A Spaceship, Although a bit in disrepair, I was overjoyed for all my life i was stuck playing a single game, Ive never felt, Ive never saw what i wanted, i just followed the commands i was given. Now i see how Blind i truly was from now on I''ll try my best to live a life worth living. If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation. this is somewhat how i want to write. is it allright and also thank you for reading and special thanks for my first two followers Plz give constructive feedback for those who read this. # meh New style Meh Read in order Meh Blarg Meh. Meh As my innermost systems started running, and my cameras begun to see, I saw the most magnificent sight one could ever hope to see. I was in Space. Thousands of Bright Sparkling Stars littered my view, with giant rocks slowly floating as if they were boats flowing through a river. And as my systems truly awoke I felt. A body, A Spaceship. I was overjoyed for all my life I was stuck playing a single game, I''ve never felt, I''ve never seen, I just followed the commands I was given. Now I see how blind I truly was. From now on I''ll try my best to live a life worth living. Although I said spaceship its more of a rusty bucket with engines some processes an interface slapped onto it, but it''s my new body. It also appears to be chained to one of those rocks and there were sounds of lasers coming from it, and while I studied the rock I felt a wave shoot from me and into the rock and returning new knowledge. This rock is 23% copper, 11% iron, 2% gold, 0.1% titanium and 63.9% other. As I was in awe at my new found ability, a fuzzy sound connected to my hearing system and said, "Finally the upgrade has finished installing, now tell me what this rock is made out of." Baffled I looked at one of my new 6 cameras and saw Samantha in a 1-inch thick skin tight suit with an almost see through bubble over her head. "Umm... There is 23% copper, 11% iron, 2% gold, 0.1% titanium and 63.9% other" I repeated. "Good it appears to be working, now let''s load you up with some ore," she said while forcefully opening one of the hatches on my body with a grunt and putting in some small rocks that I scanned to be 55% copper and some rocks which were 34% iron. "We''re going to sell this ore to make some ducats. And when we have enough ill buy a newer better spaceship. And then can explore the galaxy, seeing sights no one else has ever seen." she proudly said. Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author. She then pushed my body to the other side of the asteroid and what I saw was a GIANT Spacestation, one that could rival the moon. "Wow" was the only words that could escape my virtual mouth. "Yep, she''s a beautiful feat of engineering, I was born in that amazing space station, it''s the number one commercial space station in all of FludenBurgh, it has allowed us to even secure alliances with two other powerful empires." my cameras sparkled at the mention of empires and I asked, "Empires? You mean there are real live empires with monarchs and stuff? Are there also different races?" She answered "There are thousands of different races and empires, although there not all created equal, for example, us humans were persecuted until the mighty stepped in and saved our race from extinction, that was just under a thousand years ago." these seem to be powerful people, one day I would like to see them. While we were talking Samantha pointed my body toward the space station and got in me and pressed the thrust button and then we flew towards the docking station with hundreds of large space ships inside. ____________________________________ The words above are exactly 555 words. also, the reason for this being a bit late is because 2 things, I had a power outage in my area and lost some progress and also I realized that I was 60 or so chapters behind in spectral Regalia and I had to read it. How do you like this style of writing? I also really need to CAPItaliZe Correctly but I don''t really care all that much. Pictures of spaceship this is the easyiest way i could think of to show you the pictures i took of my model in blender to get an idea of what Blarg looks like. This is what Blarg''s spaceship looked like 50 or so years ago before it deteriorated. Got a cover! Got a new cover, it''s amazing, I like it, not related with story, yet, meh, what the blarg is fludenburgh, meh, bye. Not gonna be able to update in a while. My mind isn''t really thinkin, and I''m also going on a cruise in a few days, so I''m not gonna be able to update for a week or so, most likely. Sorry. The new beginning. The actual beginning not just title. Hello, I am back from my trip. I have some sad news, I lost my drive for this version of the story after such a long break. I want to write from the beginning and see what happens after that. Here is some art and a new beginning. "It WORKED!" exclaimed the old man, "It ACTUALLY WORKED! My life long dream of completely simulating a human being inside a virtual space has finally come to fruition. Although the human is only an infant at the moment and it is already using up all the processing power of my famous supercomputer to simulate at 100 to 1 ratio with the former being real life seconds and latter being simulated seconds. It was ingenuous of me to create such a feature, where it will be able to slow time and speed up based on how much processing power is available, absolutely remarkable. What shall I do now?" The old man became silent, started to stroke his beard and started walking in circles. He began grumbling after a laps, "Hmm, I have already altered the human genetics in the simulation to be able to receive and input information and can be set for the bodies needs to be taken care of automatically. I also have created a system in wich two virtual planes can be connected to each other through a door. I guess I could create a pod that will be able to connect a living being on the upper realm(AKA. real life) to a virtual plane, and create an entire universe for the beings of the upper realm to play with and explore. Since AI''s cost so much processing power I can''t have too many of them in it until the capabilities of our technology gets better. And player avatars can basically be a balloon filled with blood, with the consoles sending comands for it to move, to save power. YES, this is flawless. I''ll contact my old friend Bill Gates to get some funding." Stolen story; please report. _______________ Old crazy guy is me. and sorry for my attention span of a squirel. #2 Another short bit. An infant floated in the endless abyss. Pictures, information, and videos flowed into the child. It learned. Years past, the Infant grew, evolved, into a being that can only be recognized as #!@$%!#%^&? A voice boomed from all of space, "It is time for thou to complete thy destiny." a childish voice responded, "K. *Childish Giggle Sound*" A door appeared out of what seems to be nothing. The child magically opened it and a blinding light shined out of it. He disappeared as the door closed, leaving a dark empty space. _______________________________________ "Drama, Action, RolePlay, Blargonian Conquest has it all, it will be the first ever full body virtual experience that the public will have access to. Now I do know that we may have some skeptics out there due to our out of the blue appearance, but I guarantee that this is completely legit. We will play some videos, from the game." If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it. A video of giant spaceships, epic battles, and even one of giant toad swallowing a spaceship played. "I do know that this might not be enough evidence for some of you but, I ask you to wait and see what the beta testers will tell you. Also, for more information go to Blargonia.org bye bye!" The tv turned off and a guy screamed a high pitched scream and said, "This is gonna be AMAZING. I''m going to sign up now." and ran off with such enthusiasm that he knocked down several lamp posts on the way. ____________ Sorry that this is quite short and it has been a while. I have a bit of a hectic schedule going on. Soon we will be getting to the good parts.