《Reality Grants One Chance》


 Chapter 1: Pilot

    "What I see before my eyes? A chain of humanoid creatures lined up, waiting for their turn diligently, empty eyes devoid of any sign of intelligence, looking into distance and avoiding each other. Step after step I am getting closer to the reason behind this line. Another creature makes sure that everyone pays for the right of advancing forward.. only the ambient music in my head silences the unnatural sounds that accompany the process." - a tired young man indulges himself in his thought as his legs slowly shuffle along with the shortening line of people.


    "O..ou..nt..ag?" - the toll collector asks a question, not looking up. The young man can''t tell what it is saying, so he removes his headphones, stopping the loud music from messing with the sense of hearing.


    "Sorry?" - his own voice seems like something distant and forgotten. He didn''t speak for quite a long time, aloud that is. A slight sigh came from the direction of the sitting cashier, as if asking the same question to a person twice took a toll on her stamina.


    "Do you want a bag?" - The woman in a dark blue vest with a name tag that spelled "Josie" looked up at for just a brief second, before turning her eyes to the usual level.


    The young man mumbled something that sounded similar to no, so she just pressed a few buttons and declared the price.


    "I really hate supermarkets, the annoying lines of people, some of which could be top stars of a freak show, the sound of the machines, really annoying "beepbeep.. clackclackclack.. skchchch.. have a nice day" over and over again. On the other hand, milk won''t buy itself, neither will cereal" - in his thoughts he was a lot more talkative, one of the symptoms of not interacting with people outside of the screen of his computer, but on that subject- later.


    Leaving Josie and some of his cash behind, he grabbed the pack of cereal in one hand and shoved the bottle of milk under his arm, pressing it to his body.


    "Should have asked for a bag tho.." - oh yes, regretting his actions already, however he didn''t turn around to ask for the bag, as the cashier already went with the routine and was busy with the next customer.


    Slowly moving his legs, the young man went to the exit from the supermarket. A burst of chilly air hit him in the face as a wet towel. He shivered a bit, but in the end- just zipped his jacket a bit, to cover his neck. His light green eyes were squinted, as if that would help keep the warmth inside his body. The gray scenery of a busy street met him gladly, waiting to absorb his figure into the ever-moving anthill of a small city.


    The tall young man with light-brown unkempt hair stepped on the walkway, long legs carried him past other people. His stride seemed slow, however due to his height - he moved quite a bit faster than other pedestrians. His free hand reached into the back pocket of his worn and crumpled jeans for a pack of cigarettes and a lighter - he craved nicotine. A little bit cracked lips took hold of a yellowish filter and pulled, at the same time his fingers used the lighter to start fire to the cigarette.  A feint sound of crackling embers reached his ears as he inhaled the smoke, his lungs gladly accepted the poison.


    Don''t think he doesn''t know that smoking is unhealthy- on the contrary, he started smoking exactly because of that. Plus he is not underage by any means, being nineteen years of age. A light stream of smoke escaped from the corner of his mouth as he was crossing the road, his thoughts were somewhere else - one of the reasons why he heard the truck that rapidly approached him a few seconds too late. Seems like he was not the only one who didn''t pay attention. His body got hit, his legs shifted from under his body, as he rotated under the force of the impact.


    "Fuck.." - the only short thought his mind was able to mumble in the amount of time from when he noticed the unavoidable collision and the moment his face met the windshield of the truck. Everything went dark, however not before blinding light flashed before his eyes and jolt of pain spread through his body. Being unconscious has its perks, however sooner or later you have to wake up.


    ...


    His vision was blurry, he couldn''t focus or understand where he was. The only thing he was sure of - he wasn''t on the same street. Blinding light didn''t help with regaining his eyesight, on top of that the headache was killing him, plus he felt as if he was about to throw up. Someone was walking around him talking, his hearing was as good as his eyesight. He didn''t hear shit, however he smelled something sweet.


    Yes, that''s right - he was hit by a truck and sent somewhere else. The hospital.


    The cars in the premises of the city don''t move fast enough to kill a person, not on busy days.


    "Fuck mothering traffic light must have been broken... being hit by a big white truck - that would be a great start to the generic anime.. or manga... or a light novel." - His thoughts were haphazard, so he paid little attention to the doctor or whoever the hell the person pointing a flashlight into his open eyes was.


    "A minor concussion.. blablablabla.. go get an x-ray" - he concluded the whole array of sentences into a short phrase. He was just bruised and bleeding a bit from his head, which was already bound by bandages.  - "I''d rather the driver would accelerate.. at least I wouldn¡¯t feel like shit"


    Half an hour later he was sitting in a medical examination room and a woman in a white coat, with a stethoscope around her neck, was pointing at the x-ray of his chest, telling him that everything was okay, no broken ribs, or even cracks. The young man was looking at the black and white picture, not minding the explanations - he didn''t care much.


    "That''s the second time I see an x-ray of my insides after being hit by a vehicle..." - He mumbled slightly, the doctor already knew that, as well as all other information from his personal file. No comments from the doc, she was professional - that is good news.


    "What''s with me and cars?"


    ...


    Around five years ago, he was in a similar situation, though then it was just being careless with his friends from school. Running around, chasing each other - he didn''t notice a car, and the driver didn''t expect a kid to throw himself into his car. Boom crack crash.


    He was lucky then too, no broken bones, just a slight fright and a few bruises, however his parents insisted on a full body check. Doctors troubled face seemed ridiculous to the teenage boy, the fact that only his parents were called into the office for a talk was even more ridiculous. He was fine, not like a few bruises could kill him right? When the door to the doc''s office opened and his father looked at him with murky eyes and invited him in, he was actually nervous. Mom was crying, the doctor had an adamant expression, however he looked at him with.. pity?


    "What the actual fuck?" - he didn''t voice his worries, but it wasn''t necessary, soon he was presented with the truth.. his parents insisted that he is informed and aware.


    The doctor hung the black sheet in front of a light display, black and white image of bone matter on an x-ray shone into vision.


    "Is that a potato" - the teen immediately caught sight of a somewhat diluted spot on the image, as if someone spilled milk on it or something.


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    ....


    At fourteen he was diagnosed with lung cancer, that was around five years ago. Now he was sitting in front of a similar sight, but there was no sight of the murky spot in his lungs tho. A lot has happened in his life .


    "Mr.  Johan..."


    "I know my name doc." "..and I hate it.."


    " If you have nothing to say, I believe that there is no need for me to stay in the hospital for any longer.. " - He


    interrupted, eager to get the hell out of this place. The concussion wasn''t serious, and even though he looked like an abuse mop, everything was as fine as it could be.


    "You are free to leave." - The woman slightly wrinkled her eyebrows, but didn''t say anything else, she had no intention to hold someone in the hospital for longer than necessary.


    "Great evening. Went to get some treats, ended up being fucked up, covered in milk and smelling of cereal in a hospital." - He reached into the back pocket of his pants, happily noticing that his pack of poison was in place, along with the lighter. One fluid motion and he was blowing smoke into the air, standing near an ashtray just a few meters outside the hospital parking lot.


    "Well.. seems like I''ll have to eat some insta-noodles today. Shall I walk home, or be less advent.." - No time was given for him to finish the thought. The light haired man was just reaching to the ashtray to throw away the cigarette, however it fell to the ground shortly before it could reach the tray. Next to it was a small pile of quickly disappearing ash. The young man was nowhere to be seen. Just like that, without a sound, without any warning of flashy effects, he seized to exist, turning into ash.


    People passed by as if nothing happened, no-one seemed to mind the sudden disappearance of a young man, as if he wasn''t there in the first place.


    ....


    He felt something crawling on his skin, as if hundred of ants were crawling under his clothes, his head was still spinning, his legs were numb, and he felt cold.


    "Why does it sting like that? Did I lose consciousness?" - His eyesight was greeted with a scenery of forest canopy, light was crawling from between the leaves and branches. His senses were back to normal and the stinging became rather painful, he brushed his leg, feeling tiny objects crawling and sticking to him.


    "Is ants!" - the green eyed youth jumped up in surprise, trying to shake off the insects that were biting into his white skin, leaving red marks and a lingering stinging sensation. He ran away from the anthill near which he has awoken. His hands frantically tried to slap the ants away from his legs, torso and even hair. The latter part was harder to do, as his hair was messy, curling up in different directions - simply  bed hair. Even though it was on the shorter side, it proved to be hard to get angry ants out of.


    Breathing heavily he was able to regain his composure finally, but not before stepping on a twig, hurting his bare foot.


    "Fuuu..." - angrily the young man kicked the branch, sending in into the nearby bush. He was certainly in a forest. How he got here, he had no idea at all. First thing he noticed- his headband was gone, his clothes were gone.. now he was wearing only a pair of crude pants.. which could be described only as an old potato sack.. they were itchy as all hell..


    "Other than the pants.. no shoes.. no jacket... and on top of that I am running commando.. nice.." - His eyes twitched slightly, the situation was ridiculous. - " I don''t want to jump into conclusions.. but there are a number of possibilities which could be taking place... neither of which sound realistic at all.."


    His hands pressed on his ribcage - it didn''t hurt, so the bruises the size of an apple were gone.


    "Minus one possibility. " - he tasted his own saliva in his mouth. The tongue felt normal, so no dehydration.


    "Wasn''t drugged either. So that''s out of the question.. minus another explanation." - The young man looked at himself one more time. No dirt on the strange clothes, or rather on the potato sack, as if it was new. No dirt or any cuts on his legs or arms.


    "OK.. what the fuck is that" - he finally took notice of the black mark on the backside of his hand. The light haired young man licked his left thumb, then tried brushing the black mark off. It didn¡¯t even change color. Intricate pattern looked like some random tribal lines, or a sigil, or some sort of letters.


    "A tattoo... which looks like something Mustang would have on his glove.. this shit is getting more impossible by the minute." - Just in case he snapped his fingers a few times, clapped them together and placed on the tree. Surely, nothing happened, but he expected as much - it helped him calm down a bit tho.


    He sat on the damp moss under some tall tree to regain his composure, he checked for ants beforehand tho. Long fingers massaged the temples of his head. -  "Have to do something... other than being ridiculous that is. Calm down first... what is the most ridiculous scenario?"


    The forest was silent enough for him to hear his own rough breathing, he was nervous. More than that - he was scared shitless. In the woods, wearing a sack and not knowing where to go, panic was a normal reaction, however he was trying to regain some semblance of composure,  thinking about ridiculous things and turning on his imagination on was a way to do exactly that.


    "OK.. I am dressed as some hobo, dropped in a random location with a Dark Seal on my hand... goddammit at least


    give me some weapon.. even the deprived have a fucking club.. OK.. what would I do normally? ...choose a name and tweak appearance.. the second part is not happening obviously, so I am stuck with my ugly mug.. the name.. not like there is a HUD where I will see it.. but hey..have to have a legend if I bump into someone. Not like I will go babbling my real name to anyone? Is there even anyone?" He lost track of his own thoughts, thinking about things like - what should he call himself, what is the point of the tattoo thingy, as well as why are the pine trees covered with leaves rather than needled. "Shit doesn''t make any sense.."


    Nothing lasts forever, even the silence in the forest. A shriek somewhere far away notified him that Idling about is not something that will be the best course of action. There wasn''t one shriek either, a second followed, as well ass a echoing sound of running getting closer to his location.


    "Hide.." - being scared, his reaction is normal - run away, but where to? He doesn''t even know what is behind those trees or those bushes. So he chose to dive into some thick bushed and take cover in their shadow, seeing a bit outside. Smell of moss was actually a bit calming, the shrieks however grew louder, so did his heartbeat. He could hear the drums in his ears, and feel the cold sweat starting to run along his shoulder-blades.


    "It''s getting closer" - His panicked eyes grew wider, as the sounds were approaching closer.. from behind the trees he saw movement, something was running through the forest.


    "Shitshitshitshit" - He panicked and prayed that it would be something like a bunny, and that the bunny wouldn¡¯t bite his throat off, and that it would run somewhere else. However bunnies don''t shriek do they?


    "Fuck.."

 Chapter 2: The first encounter

    A shriek pierced my ears like a knife, sending shivers down my neck and making my body react by tensing up. I was scared to my core, who wouldn''t be? Good thing that my bladder was already empty, as bricks would be shat - quite literally. I could hear the sound of multiple entities running, twigs being stepped on, as well as rustling of branches in the distance. That was nothing compared to the sound of my heart racing in my own ears though.


    "Goddammit.. why am I that scared?" - I asked myself, as my lungs tried to steady the breathing. I failed miserably, but at least managed to slow down the panting a little bit, fear has appeared out of nowhere - I didn''t expect it at all. The smell of damp moss was not soothing in the slightest, it was a tingling reminder that I was not dreaming.


    Why the certainty? I don''t remember ever smelling anything in a dream. Feeling, seeing and hearing yes - not smelling or tasting, everything before me was one and only - reality.


    A figure rushed from within the bushes into a clearing, a man. Human as far as I could tell, I was not sure about anything at all right now, but on the first glance he appeared to be one. It was a bit too far to distinguish any fine details, my eyesight was not the finest of tools - that can happen when you indulge yourself in the virtual reality and stare into a screen for hours daily.


    What was apparent - the human was male, probably a little bit shorter than me - which meant that he was around average height, a bit under hundred and eighty centimeters. Yes, I am indeed taller than that, though I consider myself being normal height at hundred and ninety centimeters. The man that appeared from the woods had dark hair and light skin, or he was just pale from being out of breath.. to get a better look I would have to come closer, which my body wouldn''t let me do at all. I was stuck, even though at first I wanted to stand up and scream something like "HEY!". I didn''t... somehow I couldn''t, or rather I wouldn''t let myself do something like that.


    "No.." - I could hear the slight whisper somewhere in the back of my head, my instincts were telling me to act like a coward, or rather be smart. That human could not be the one that produced the blood-chilling shriek, and if he did - even more reasons to go full nope on him and remain in the cozy darkness of the bushes.


    The man ran about twenty meters, enough for me to make out that he was dressed in some old fashioned clothes. His clothes were odd, they looked like something you would see in books on medieval history, or in a movie about a certain fellow called Max, who was mad or something. Brown pants, rough greyish-white shirt, and a cloak that swayed behind him as he was running. Well- that was better than my potato-sack-pants, maybe he can point me in the direction of the nearest village or whatever.


    As I was looking at the running man, seems like I missed the ones that were following him, or rather shall I say- hunting. Two figures appeared from behind the trees and rapidly caught up with the running man. My hand twitched as I again wanted to stand up, run in and help the poor fellow. Wanted? A moment later I started doubting that, as I saw the feral figures push his body to the ground and start ripping him apart.


    They weren''t dogs, they weren¡¯t anything I could call an animal - they looked humanoid, nothing similar to Earthen animals. It would be easy to call them goblins due to their large heads and short height, but they looked nothing like a goblin.. mostly nothing like the usual image that would appear on screen if you would type the word in the search-bar.


    For one- they weren''t green, the shade was more rotten-brown with a bit of gray. Their skin was similar to that of a toad. In fact- they did look like toads, toads that had claws on their slim and dry hands. Toads that had a monkeys'' face for a head, a deformed and ugly monkey face. God they were far too close to my liking, the pressure made my insides turn as I tensed up, trying not to disturb even a leaf.


    Those creatures were bashing and clawing the man, probably angry at him for running away. Something reached my ears, a strange sound. It wasn''t quiet, seems I didn''t notice it at first. I heard everything as if my ears were filled with water. The sounds were distant, but finally my own heartbeat, and those screams became the only thing I heard. I did not understand any of the words I could make out from the deafening screams of a dying man, nevertheless - it wasn''t a language I could understand. I didn''t want to know what his words were, but the pain was apparent.


    The toad creatures stood up, all the previous screaming stopped and I was left to listen to my own heartbeat for quite some time. I couldn''t make anything out from where I was lying, it was certain that their victim was dead.


    I just witnessed a man being killed. What''s worse - I didn''t move a finger to help, I couldn''t.. I would die if i did. Silence made some space for a flood of thoughts to rush in.


    However what came next was even worse than the deafening screams and I wished that the forest wasn''t so quiet. I wished the echo wouldn''t bring the sounds of cloth ripping, followed by wet strikes of stone connecting to flesh. The creature was swinging a small stone hatchet, crushing it on the shoulder of the now dead body. The skin ripped, and the bones started breaking, which was apparent by the loud "crack" that echoed through the underbrush.


    I could feel my stomach turning at the sounds, as if it was me who was being smashed apart. I could only stay silent, and watch, nothing else.


    The second toad-monkey was swinging what looked like a rope with a stone tied to it, trying to get it around a branch of a tree. I knew what was going to happen, I knew too well - the hunters always processed their game on the spot, those creatures weren''t different. The rope creaked as they pulled on it. First I saw the legs- which were tied, allowing the small creatures to lift the carcass in the air. I still wasn''t able to see the face of the man they killed, the grass was covering parts of the view..not like I wanted to look at it.


    My thoughts collapsed on themselves, all of the smart remarks that were coming to mind a few minutes, no..even moments ago, disappeared. This is not something I could imagine, more so, I wish that everything would be just a little nightmare, caused by me dropping unconscious on the parking lot of the hospital. It wasn''t the case though, I was stuck lying in some bushes, while watching a short ugly-faced creature pull out some small tool from its belt.


    I don''t need to see it to know what he pulled out. The necessary tool in order to process a killed animal - a knife. I could have sworn that I heard it perfectly, as the knife dug into the neck of the freshly killed human. I could make out the sound of the dripping sticky blood  landing on the moss, the smell wasn''t better - it reached me in a matter of minutes, spreading like an oil leak. Just in time for the main course, as the body was stripped from the remaining clothes and the stomach was opened.


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    Ironic how while someone else intestines fell on the mossy flooring of the forest, I was trying my best to keep the contents of my own stomach inside. I had to swallow the vomit that filled my mouth twice. The bitter taste of the stomach juices kept me from smelling any more blood. It didn''t help with sounds though, even worse - I couldn''t turn away, as I was too scared to lose track of the creatures even for a split second. Even if it meant to keep on looking, as they were cutting the head off, as they chopped the palms off of the body, as they piled all of the edible organs back inside of the corpse - using it as a basket. As they were moving away into the distance, I was still looking at them. At those short, warded backs as they disappeared between the trees.


    My eyes became dry, they hurt like all hell, however I remained still. Time passed and I could feel my body relax enough for me to move. My legs were shaking though, so I couldn''t pull myself up. I remained in the bushes for a bit longer, trying to keep myself from bursting into tears or worse- screaming. High pitched ringing was clouding my thoughts. I couldn''t think, or rather I wouldn''t risk to. The following half an hour were spent in the same position, belly on the moss, staring forward.


    I was finally able to pull myself together and stand up on all four limbs, slowly, still waiting for some sort of ambush. The forest was just too quiet for me to calm down. The sound of blood dripping was still lingering in my mind.


    "Please be safe.." - My eyes broke contact with the spot between the trees at which I was staring at. I turned around, in the opposite direction from where the toad-monkeys left, and crawled away from the safe haven of the bushes. I didn''t know where to go, but one thing was certain - not there, anywhere but there. My legs were able to make only a few steps before stopping.


    "But they did leave the scraps of his gear and clothes.." - My brain betrayed me. Most of the thoughts crossing my mind are random - simply a reaction to something catching my attention. The fact that it is a survival situation caught my attention, and the brain responded accordingly. Internal debates happened in a blink of an eye, my inner search engine began to remember everything that may prove being useful. No- not my amazing boyscout training, I never had one. What I did have- was common sense, logic and a lot of haphazard information from having a bit too much free time on my hands. Now - all of the useless videos from the internet that "prepared" you to survival, were flooding my mind, none had anything useful for the current situation. Amongst the stupid information one thought was practical - not much, but a great start.


    "Everything I scavenge might be helpful." - Goddammit brain, curse you! I am not a pro survival expert - but you don''t have to be one to know that having some things is better than having nothing at all in my case. But that meant turning around, and more importantly- going to the place of slaughter. My stomach once again made a complete turn around itself. Didn''t throw up though... that''s good.


    My mind and my body were fighting, but eventually one of the two lost, as I found myself walking toward the spot where the man was butchered. As expected - the smell was far worse than what I sensed from within the bushes. Urine, shit, guts and a lot of blood, as well as stomach juices- everything was right before me - simply lying on the ground, mixed together into one red pile. Another wave of nausea hit me, I gagged and felt the contents of my stomach to rush into my throat as I covered my mouth with my hand.


    Why did I keep swallowing the vomit back? Simple - I couldn''t let myself become dehydrated because of the stomach acting up. There was no water in sight, I reacted that way even without thinking about any reason actually.


    My eyes caught glimpse of the mans'' arm, which was grabbing onto a handful of dirt. On the back side of the palm, there was a similar tattoo. It looked completely different than that on my hand, though the location was the same. Was it some sort of brand? No, thoughts aside, I have to hurry. The smell of the body will eventually attract scavengers, or worse - some sort of a predator, anything could be lurking in these woods, now it was certain that the range of possibilities was broad as the ocean.


    I made a step and felt wet warm moss sticking to my feet. It took a bit of concentration not to look down, I didn''t want to freak out even more than I already was. A bit away from the bloody pile lied a bit of cloth, ripped from the victims pants and shirt, the toads must have taken the cloak with them, as it was mostly untouched. Bad luck for me, as only a few strips of cloth weren''t covered in gore, well.. those few were covered, but a bit less than everything in the vicinity. A piece of leather was lying beside the tree. It looked like a pouch of some sort. As i picked it up, transparent liquid poured out from it, smelling like some hard liquor.


    Inside was a broken glass bottle, small at that. Doesn''t seem like a flask with booze. More like a flask of medicine, small one at it. Even though the contents were beyond salvageable, the tiny pouch and the shards of glass could be useful. For cutting my own wrists vertically, to stop all the suffering for example. I''d rather not get myself into such state though.


    A few pieces of cloth the size of a napkin, some glass and a tiny leather pouch tied with a piece of string. My efforts felt useless. I couldn''t stand being at that spot any longer, so I turned around and started walking, fast - without looking back. You could think that I should have buried the remains, giving the person his last rites. I say - fuck that. I couldn''t look an the dead eyes of the unknown man for longer than a second. I would not be able to dig the earth just to bury him... I am not sorry, I just want to get further away from that spot, further away from killer monkey-toads.


    "... and there I thought all the games, movies and shit made us less sensitive to the sight of violence and gore.. they didn''t..." - My hands were still trembling like crazy, I could make out the sound of glass jingling in the pouch that i held wrapped in the bloodied pieces of cloth. It seems like I started calming down, or rather switching my attention to what was important - not becoming That..


    Dressed in potato-sack pants, feet covered in blood and carrying a tiny parchment with some garbage, I walked while trying to avoid the sharp twigs on the ground. It was obvious that I had to come up with a plan, however - right now I was only able to focus on walking.


    So I did exactly that, walked in the woods, with no idea where I was going.

 Chapter 3: Importance and Dangers of Distractions

    "Come to think about it.. the forest doesn''t feel chilly," - I tried distracting myself with some thoughts, not like there was anyone here I could talk to, left to myself. Maybe I will eventually make myself a Wilson to talk to, probably not.. there aren''t any volleyballs growing on the trees. Thinking about anything but what happened less than an hour ago was calming my mind. Best reaction a human can get when facing fear, well, for me at least, is to ignore it, think about anything else...yep, distraction is the best cure for a damaged mind. - "The air is warm, its still somewhere around noon probably, or it would be getting quite a bit darker already. I won''t freeze to death, the ground feels rather warm... too bad that I don''t know the geography of this place.. I don''t even know what season it is right now"


    The all mighty providence didn''t leave me even a minute to think without new distractions.  Stinging sensation on my skin made me reflectively slap that spot, only to reveal a  small swelling on my forearm, as well as a buzzing noise near my ear. A sigh escaped my lips, the old enemy found me again.. mosquitoes, those tiny bastards that feast on blood, those itch inducing vampires, oh I hated them. For one- it was the only creature I''d rather not be in this world.


    "At least they are not five meters tall... that would be fearsome." - A giant buzzing bloodsucker, anything but that thank you. However something ticked in my head the next moment and smile appeared on my face. Even though I hated them, I knew one thing about them - if it''s really dry- they have nowhere to breed. Meaning there is a puddle somewhere, meaning water, meaning that I won''t die in the next week at least...from natural causes like starvation. Being assaulted was still something to watch out for though.


    OK, I was heading in the direction of some water source, hoping that it''s not a swamp, as that would be disappointing. Something occurred to me.. even though I was walking for at least an hour or so, the sunlight level didn''t change much - it even became brighter. Even in the shadows of the trees I could feel the heat. Where the sun reached the underbrush - the patches of moss dried out, turning turquoise-greyish and becoming brittle. They cracked under my feet as I stepped on them.


    My feet hurt, occasional poking from a stick I didn''t notice, or even stepping on the local equivalent of a fir-cone, it was a bit of damage. Feet that were usually protected by footwear weren''t hard enough to withstand the elements. I remembered a show where one of the hosts was always walking bare-foot, even in some of the colder regions. Well, I was not like that guy, so my feet were just too soft, and right now burning from pain.


    "I should have walked far enough" - the problem with walking through the woods is that I couldn''t tell if I was heading in the same direction. In reality I probably made a curve rather than a straight line. I just hoped that I won''t make a full circle eventually, the thought of stumbling into those creatures made me shiver. I tried being quiet, but for someone who isn''t a pro survivalist or a hunter, well probably the only time I wasn''t noticeable was splattered in the bushes, holding my breath and trying not to move. Right now - every time I moved, I created sound, probably, hard to tell yourself. There was no animals around. Of course some birds were prancing around in the top of the trees, nothing else though. Quite a pickle if you ask me.


    I sat down on a little patch of dry moss, which creaked and broke down into dust. My fingers immediately started scratching the fresh mosquito bites, however I forced myself to stop. It was hard to do, as itching starts to irritate your mind quite fast, but I didn''t want to scratch my skin off. Dirt and mosquito bites equals infected wounds, and with no way to wash or disinfect those- well I doubt that it would be pretty, an inflamed wound oozing pus wasn''t something I would be able to deal with at the moment.


    Finally I looked around and watched the new environment. Right about time huh? Well I had a lot on my mind, still feeling like shit after seeing someone killed before me. I had no time to sulk tho, no self-pity, nothing like that - it helped me stay sane tho. I had too much things on my mind other than what happened that I could bury those unnecessary emotions a lot deeper.


    As I stretched my feet, that were barely covered over the knees with the sack-pants, I relaxed and looked around. If you think about it - the location was strange. The trees that look like pine, and smell like it too - had leaves. Moss was growing everywhere, however patches of grass were not rare. Young saplings that clumped together into tiny forests, bushes with long leaves that looked like strands of paper and occasionally wild vines were coiling around the stems of trees. It was something else entirely. I could tell that it was not some sort of flat-lands, in the distance I could make out drops in altitude and even some hills. More than that - there were large gray stones that poked out from the moss. Boulder sized ones even.


    "Just where the fuck am I?" - I couldn''t keep the question from escaping my lips. I wouldn''t be surprised if by some magical force I was made to talk in a completely different language. I was talking as per usual, in the same old boring tongue. Well - nothing surprising, not all amazing fantasy stories are good. Someone has to experience the shitty ones why not me?


    Hit by a car and strait into another world, or a mutant monkey habitat... both possibilities sucked, the mosquito sucked too.. literally. A slap of my hand left a small spot of blood on my skin. Got it..


    I unwrapped my scarce belongings and took a good look at the broken glass. It was murky, but solid, the pieces were around half a thumb long and rather different in size, around half of them were sharp enough to cut something. At least I have some sort of a semblance of a knife, which means nothing is yet completely lost. I had a crude, but a tool, that was more than starting with only bare hands... though if I found a few rocks I could smash them on one another to get a stone flake that would be as sharp..goddammit.


    "..starting in an unknown place with nothing but your bare fists.. huh?" - A certain game came to mind, though I doubt that punching trees or hiding underground would be a valid course of action. I would just be left with bleeding knuckles, don''t know about the sleeping underground part, but probably not a great idea either. Plus as far as I could see - the physics of this world were completely normal, if you discount the noon that seemed to last forever. Not like I was gullible enough to believe that another world had the same number of hours in a day, and yes I say another world already. This was rather obvious to anyone in the least familiar with video games, or anime, or manga, or light novels, or anything from the internet..


    "I am like Robinson Crusoe, but on a lot bigger scale.. he had a dog at least.. and a whole ship somewhere in the distance... what do I have? A broken bottle of aspirin or some shit.. not enough fabric to even make a pair of socks.. and a sack smaller than my ball-sack.. thank you! Well..I have some amazing information somewhere in my head.. if it was only possible to access it without relying on the random pop-ups..." - I was grumpy, the first sign that I was getting hungry. Not like it was a bad thing, too far from starvation still, being hungry can be a good thing, motivating you to move. Well, that is how I tried calming myself.


    As I started to fold the "inventory" back into the pieces of cloth, my hand grabbed a bit of dry moss and stashed it into one of the more dry pieces of fabric. It could prove to be a good enough tinder in case I was able to come with a way to start a fire. And speaking of starting a fire, I finally stood up and headed to a nearby bush. The plant was dead and had no green parts, it had been dried by the sun, and that was just perfect. I broke a few sticks from the stem, tied my belongings to them and continued walking.


    No, it''s not a weapon, but did you think you could just take a few sticks, rub them together and voila - fire? Nope, well... not in my theory loving brain. In order to make fire sticks, you would have to find some sort of soft wood, preferably straight. Get rid of the bark and leave those sticks to dry on the sun for a few days or so. Even that time I didn''t have, so dry wood and some tinder could mean a lot for me.


    Did I say I hate mosquitoes? They keep coming for a bite of my blood.. well - not like they keep sucking for a long time.. once they feel that something is off- they fly right off. Yep - mosquitoes hate the post-chemo blood. If they could tell their friends that my blood was not as good as I smelled - so that they could stop biting me to try it, would be great. There were just a fuck-ton of them around, so even one bite per fucker - meant a lot of bites..


    I saw a bit of a clearing up ahead, finally - water. Ye-no.. It was more of a pond than a lake. It was not deep - maximum waist deep, on the first glance.. what''s more it was all covered in vegetation, and the smell - well, wasn''t quite pleasant. In short- the lake looked like a tiny marsh, with water that you rather not drink, unless you want some diarrhea or whatever. What''s more - as expected, it was a breeding point for the mosquitoes, so there were literally thousands of them.


    "There is fish in the pond, that''s a deal breaker. Going too far away from this place wouldn''t be smart. Food is food, and there is nothing else in those woods that would come close to me.." - I continued with my thoughts while circling the pond. Even though it seemed small - there had to be some source of water which fed it. Of course it could be an underground spring or other source, or even rainwater, but that wouldn''t help me - right? If there is a chance that there is a different source of water- I had to look for it. What I noticed- the mosquitoes suddenly disappeared, that made me wonder if I just stumbled upon something amazing without even realizing it.


    First thing that seemed off- was a short purplish bush, with leaves that looked like that of a maple tree and it smelled of moss. I mean - literally it smelled the same as a piece of moss that i crushed in my fingers. Completely bizarre, but I had to make sure. So off I go back to the mosquito city, only to find myself surrounded by the buggers once more, and back to the bush. You say its obvious, but I had to make sure once more. So I took a small branch of that bush that I broke off, and returned to the place where mosquitoes were in abundance. To my satisfaction - they avoided me. Some potent bug repellent that branch was, they avoided me for good. Best feeling ever, maybe worth making into a paste and rubbing on my skin, or burning in a fire to scare the bugs away - good plan- lets do it straight away...not.


    The plant was new, it could scare the flying atrocities away, but that was the only thing that I knew about it. What if it burns the skin, or melts your eyes out as you burn it? Even back home there were some dangerous plants. I had to be cautious of everything and anything, even more in this world. Back home I knew at least some of the plants, here- nothing. So I ripped a leaf from the plant and rubbed it on my skin. Oh, I just did the opposite of what I was warning myself? Don''t think so. I applied the leaves only to a small area, and if some reaction would occur within a few hours, then it could potentially be harmful to me, if no - then I had the best anti-mosquito remedy that also didn''t smell like shit.


    As I proceed past the bush, I could notice some more of them all around. Purplish spots here and there, for some reason the plants preferred this location to the other side of the pond-lake. Why became apparent only after a few minutes of walking around. At the foot of the hill that was leading to the pond- was a tiny stream of water. I almost cried in delight - it was a freshwater spring.


    Well.. to be honest, the find was good, but not lifesaving. Of course the water from the lake could not be drunk as is, but it''s not like I would die from thirst if I wouldn''t find the spring. So it wasn''t a necessity, but just a novelty. I didn''t care though, my hands brought the cold water to my face and I tasted it. Amazing if you ask me, drinking for the first time in this place, I could feel my body screaming with joy, I was like a dry sponge which was put into a bowl of water.


    This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it.


    I sat down on the ground near the spring and let the flowing water wash away the blood from my feet. It was finally getting a bit cooler in here, seems like the sun finally decided to move along and stop killing me with heat. I swear - if there were no trees - my skin would look like the purple plant, with a tinge more red to it. Ye, I don''t get tanned easy, rather become sun-burnt. But the cool air reminded me of one thing - soon, it will become dark, and I didn''t want to stay in the darkness for god knows how long.. for all I know - it could last a year, with deadly light-hating monsters rushing after me.. though I wouldn''t have Vin Diesel to cover my ass..


    So next on the list was making a fire. Oh boy, the fun part for every apocalyptic enthusiast, survivalist or anyone stupid enough to forget to bring a lighter while camping. Time to collect some wood, and so I did, as I headed a bit away from the pond area and back into the woods, where dead branches were scattered, and even occasional rotten but dry felled tree could be seen. Starting with tiny twigs and dry leaves and grass, I started piling the wood a bit away from the stream. Dry bark from the felled tree looked nice, so I collected quite a bit of it, besides it smelled of pine - so at least it would burn like it as well. I looked for bigger branches, but the only thing I found was a lean young tree which was quite dry and lacked any bark. It was rotten and partially eaten by some sort of insects, but other than that - the wood was still there, so it would burn. The only thing - the smallest broken down piece was around three meters long, as well as thick as both my feet combined. It was also a minute or so away from the place where I decided to set up the camp...and it was on the other side of the hill, so ye. Time to break some sweat, which is stupid and shouldn''t be done by anyone, but I wanted to burn a big log.


    My hands were killing me after three steps of pulling the log uphill, it was a heavy bastard. I wasn''t that weak was I? Oh.. no I was actually. Before all that cancer jazz I was stronger than now, and I was fifteen at that time. So yes, at the moment I was weaker than five years ago, yay to seclusion from the world and self pitying. Nevertheless, I kept at it. Letting the steam out by pulling on the log with both hands, just the usual guy stuff.  Well it didn''t last long, the uphill struggle. About ten minutes of panting and I dropped it down the hill and let the gravity do its job as I looked at the rolling log. Quite a sight if you think about it.


    As you may have noticed - I am quite easily distracted. Some hours ago I was trembling and afraid of even breathing, now I was launching a log down the hill, looking as it crashed into a few trees, breaking into three. Retarded, I realized what I have done only a few moments later. I fucking made a lot of noise, the thought of those toad thingies hearing the noise and coming closer to take a look made me shudder and freeze right away. I kept still, but in my head I was yelling, mostly at myself for the stupid carefree attitude taking charge for a few moments. I could literally die, but still made so much noise. Stupid moron.. A person doesn''t change just after a few hours, this will take a while to readjust to. That sort of behavior is unacceptable.


    "I could be dead three times already" - I hastily picked up a fat stick that was lying on the mossy floor. Somehow I was scared, but if it was necessary, I wouldn''t go down easily. Not like it would be hard for anything in this forest to cap me. I proceeded down the hill in a rather grim mood.


    "Just a few moments of rest, just a bit of good in this situation.. and I relaxed.. I was reckless, that was dangerous." - I lifted the makeshift club and tapped myself on the forehead, a slight ting of pain was just a reminder that this is not a dream. Pulling the shortened log was a lot easier, but not worth the risk.


    Originally I planned to set up a camp near the stream, but now I decided otherwise. My arm didn''t become red, nor did it sting at all - good enough for me to say that the plant will not kill me immediately. If I plan to set up a fire, it will be seen from outside, which will suck monkey-balls in the sense of safety. Screaming on the top of my lungs "FUCKING EAT ME!" would be less suicidal, not like I would do that. Not now anyway. The plan was easy as tits tho, to hide the fuck away from sight. Preferably in the area with the mosquitoes, as it is filled with miniature forests of tall, even gigantic, bushes. And that''s where the purple bushes come handy, but before that - one last test on the leaves and I could spend the night in sort of a safe place. I ripped a leaf from the plant and chewed on it for a bit, turning it into mush and letting it rest under my tongue. I didn''t swallow any saliva just in case, just spat on the ground. As expected- the leaf was very bitter, as if someone mixed coffee with soap. Not a great taste, but I have to check the plant for gods sake.. I don''t want to apply poison to my skin and end up dead a few hours later.


    While the lab test in my mouth was taking place, I took my time to crawl around the mosquito infested area, and I brought the branch from the bush along with me. It didn''t work as good as when it was fresh, but it kept the most of the blood-sucking monsters away.


    Crawling through the thick bushes without any shoes was painful, even more so as I was trying to be at least somewhat quiet. Every five minutes or so I had to regain my focus, keep my mind where it should be and not wandering around. I hit my forehead with my fist every time I made a noise that could be avoided, fair self-discipline, may be stupid, but I had no other idea on how to keep myself from acting stupid while getting distracted by the tasks at hand.


    It took me a while of exploring the area, and a few little cuts and bruises, but I found a perfect area for a camp. Amongst the thick cover of tall bushes, was a clearing. A five meter wide somewhat circular shape was perfect for a camp. It seems some long time ago the place in the middle was a campfire. The bushes didn''t grow directly in the area, but my own fire would fit perfectly. Plus i knew what to do in order to keep it under control and perfectly safe - well, as far as safe goes.


    It was quite hard getting out of the bushes, but that was the plan. It was impossible for anything to get to me without me noticing beforehand, and I would be able to react. Not the best plan, of course. I could still be ambushed, surrounded. Here I felt safe a bit more than outside.  So started the preparations for the night. Well to put it into simple terms - I drank up, gathered all the wood and slowly brought it into my little enclosure within the green bushes.


    I didn''t feel any changes on my tongue either. There was no tingling, nor did I not lose sensation in it, so the purple-plant was proven safe. By the way I took the opportunity and called it Purple-Maple. Don''t judge my naming sense, it was just on a whim and without much thought put into it. The area was filled with a few piles of wood, my belongings - the trash and cloth, and only one of the three logs, as they wouldn''t work for the type of campfire that I decided on.


    In order to dig I used the sticks as a shovel, not like digging by using only my hands would be efficient. What I was left with after a few minutes of digging, were two nearby holes, one larger, the other narrower. I connected them with a small tunnel at the bottom. This way I could stack the sticks into the smaller hole, fill it and let it burn. The air will be sucked from below due to the difference in pressure caused by hot air moving upwards, and as such the flame will be contained. It will not be super bright, but I will have a bit of lighting and even if it becomes colder - I will be rather warm. Another thing that I noticed while digging - the soil in here had some clay in it, so I had another Idea for the future, but that could wait for a while. No I didn''t plan to build a mud house, that is too much effort.


    I tried to postpone this part for as long as possible, but it was the only thing that remained. I even gathered a whole bunch of Purple-Maple leaves to chew into paste and rub into my exposed skin. It was time to try to light the fire, from the looks of it, I had a few hours of daylight still, yes it was a really long day cycle apparently - I felt tired, but I won''t rest without a fire...not like I was sure I would be able to light it.


    I removed the bark from the dry sticks and made a small round hole in one of them, as well as a crevice for the hot dust to fall from. Simple when you talk about it, but it was rather hard to do using small pieces of glass for a tool. Nearly cut myself, but gladly only nearly.


    "Tinder - check, small stick on top of it to allow some airflow -check, base fire-stick with the Pac-Man shape carved in - check.. the straight stick to go spin-to-win... check" - I gulped as my hands pressed on the stick and began spinning it. Applying only a bit of pressure, using mainly speed, not force. I heard slight screeching noise from dry wood, but obviously it took more time than I thought. More time, as in hours of trial and error. I failed twenty three times exactly. The charring dust wouldn¡¯t make the tinder catch fire for some reason.. First ten tries I couldn''t make even smoke, but then it became a lot easier to do so...But it still didn''t burn. I added the dry moss to tinder around try seventeen, but it wasn''t enough to catch fire. But patience kills all other motherfuckers in the room, so as I blew on the smoking pile of tinder, they caught the heat and produced bigger ember, then it roared a bit and caught fire. I could barely see at that point, as it was getting quite dark.


    As I placed the burning tinder under the prepared pile of wood, slowly I could hear it crackling and making other wood catch fire. It was the best campfire ever, for me, for this moment in time, tomorrow will be even better. My hands were covered in blisters though. I did everything I wanted, finally I sat on the log and relaxed. It was not that dark now, not that scary, not that cold and lonely. I had a fire going, I had enough fuel, and I was rather safe in this hidden spot. My chest pumped up as i took a deep breath, relaxing, and slowly my eyelids shut, letting myself doze off.


    That¡¯s when the scream came back. The scream of the man who died before my eyes, wailing in pain, gurgling as he was strangled by the ugly branchlike hands. His words were unclear, burning into mind like molten metal. The sticky sound of dripping blood accompanied him, his empty eyes were looking at me, pleading for help, asking to save him. Then he cursed me, as the dark fingers reached for my own throat from within the darkness.


    I opened my eyes, fire was still burning as bright as it was just before I fell asleep sitting. I felt a knot in my throat, I finally burst and let myself be consumed by everything. My fear, my anger, my sadness.. I silently wept while covering my eyes with my palms as if to muffle the sounds. My body shook from the painful trembling, as my tears rolled down my cheeks. It was terrifying, being alone like this. With nothing to distract me from those thoughts, I became consumed by them. I don''t know for how long I kept at it, but as suddenly as it started - I stopped. My hand reached towards a piece of wood, long and straight. I looked at it with red swollen eyes, not thinking anything as my fingers clenched the piece of glass.


    "I need a distraction after all.." - My hands started scrubbing the bark off of the piece of wood. It was going to be a long night indeed.

 Chapter 4: Sleepless Night

    I have no problems skipping a night or two of sleep. Gaming brings forth such a habit, especially if you play any sort of mass multilayer games. Grinding for hours and hours, doing the same menial task without much thought, or no thought at all, sometimes enough for someone to think you are a bot and submit a ticket to an admin. Being mistaken for a brainless and thoughtless program, not really something to be proud of. Nevertheless, removing bark from a long stick can be put into the same category of tasks, especially if the only tools you use are your own teeth, nails and tiny pieces of glass.


    "In-game it would take only a few minutes to get at least some sort of tool or weapon.. well.. depends on the game.. but mostly players are not left defenseless.." - My fingers moved along the pole, scratching the bark off with, tightly gripping the barely sharp triangular piece of glass. I would scratch, make sure the fire had enough wood to keep on burning and scratch some more. Literal grinding was as soothing as in-game, it just took a whole lot longer to get any sort of result.


    "Shall I try to get some fish to eat in the morning?" - My thoughts inevitably switched to food, which is normal, considering that my stomach was quite empty - except for water that I drank before setting up the fire.


    "I have a lot of things that I can make with just what I already have.. but everything takes time, so I won''t be able to actually work on everything at the same time.." - my eyes moved along the shaft of the pole that I have debarked. Just that took about half an hour, so making anything complex would consume even more time, especially without tools.


    "It is dry and warm, so no need to create shelter for the time being.. Bushes will do just fine, plus I have the Purple-Maple bug spray.. if any of the pro survivalists would listen to me they would cringe so hard and yell at the top of their lungs." - I knew that having no shelter was retarded, but what could I make? Even a simple cover would require something harder than a few branches that I could find, ans undoubtedly longer than that pole I had.. It barely reached my chest. Tools would make a difference, but it''s not like I could just grab a piece of wood, chew it out and make a goddamn chainsaw. Even the most primitive tools were made out of a resource that I didn''t have available. Yes, there were those huge boulders that were sticking out of the moss, but how the hell am I supposed to break a part of that?


    I rubbed the temples of my head, trying to ease the starting headache a bit. Too much to do with far too little at hand.


    "OK, lets think about it for a little bit. I have the glass pieces, one of the five is already  chipped..so four temporary cutting tools.. have to use them smarter.." - I judged myself..working on that stick wasn''t something I did with any sort of reasoning behind, I just did so to occupy myself. - " I can make a simple four pronged spear even with this.. would suffice for fishing and all..."


    Seriously, I doubted that I would catch even one fish. It''s not something that simple, without any previous practice a total amateur as myself would fail for hours at a time. Well, the days were a lot longer, that I knew. As for nights, well It became darker, not pitch black yet, so more like late evening at home. Still a long time until morning and I had no intention of sleeping any time soon.


    "I can''t move away from here.. With nothing to carry water with, I could last for a few days max.. so I am stuck here for the time being, not like I had any idea where to go. The human could have ran from the direction of some sort of settlement or a road of some sort... not going that way tho, that would be suicide.." - Yes, I remembered the man again, but letting myself let everything out was enough to let me keep my cool for a while. Ignoring everything that has to do with emotions proved to be quite an effective mechanism in this situation. I had previous experiences, not something I was going to think about at this time of course, not the time or the place. Mostly not the place.


    "I will be able to make some cordage from the fibers of young trees and bushes.. again, will take some practice, and probably a ton of wasted resources. Well, there are the vines, they will work just fine I think.. not as hard as even the crudest of ropes, but I could tie some shit up.." - the fire reflected in my eyes as I was looking at a small coil of vine amongst the wood that I collected. Hoarding everything that looked useful in the slightest was great to begin with. As I said, I wasn''t an expert on survival, but at least I am not retardedly stupid, common sense and logic were my tools, well - my logic seemed adequate to me, same with the common sense.


    "Even without the tools, I can probably weave a basket. From long grass or from thin branches of bushes..not that hard to do, so yea.. even I can make something.. fish trap, sure I''d have to put something to lure the fish in.. " - My feet rustled the earth, moving the small hard lumps that I''ve dug out when setting up the fire pit. It was clay, looked like it at least.


    " ...maybe I will be able to make something out of it. I doubt it though, even if a simple campfire can provide enough heat to fire clay, it is not likely that I will be able to make anything out of it. Not like I have feet for hands, but.. fuck it.. will try to make something.. I have seen a guy build a fucking hut from clay and mud.. Trying won''t kill me..probably." - As I sort of pumped myself up, I grabbed a thick short stick and the chipped triangular piece of glass, which I used to debark the long pole before.


    Time for some spear-making one''o''one. Step one - get a long enough stick, which I somewhat did..whatever. Step two - split it twice at the top, making a cross. Easy enough to be able to do it even with a piece of glass and a stick for a hammer. I tapped the glass lightly, slightly nudging it into the piece of wood, slowly splitting the top once, then I repeated the process. Easy enough huh? Not the end of it, I grabbed a few small sticks and some vines for cordage to proceed. Common logic and faint memories were the only guidelines for the process, I wasn''t expecting to make a legendary spear of awesomeness.


    I nudged the small short sticks into the top of the "spear", that way the ends split apart and looked like four pointy fingers. Yep - that was the idea of the spear ends. Four is better than one - covers more space, meaning that it will be easier to catch a fish with it.


    If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.


    I took the vines and tied them around the stick, not to let the wood split any further. As per what knot I used - I have no idea actually.


    I pressed the vine to the stick about palms length from the place where it was split. I pulled the vine across the pole, then back to the place where it started. I made a really elongated "U" shape this way, with the tip of the spear being pointed downwards. Then I started wrapping the vine around the shaft and itself, trying to pull it firmly, but not excessively tight. When I reached the noose that was at the split part of the spear, I pulled the vine through it, then tightened the knot by pulling on both ends. The knot tightened itself, and I bit the excess vines, leaving just a bit to re-tighten the knot. You know, just in case.


    Then I realized that my amazing knot had one flaw. It didn''t cover the sticks nudged into the spear-head, so they could fall off quite easily. The tension in the wood seemed to hold them in place of course, but they probably could fall right off. I say probably a lot do I? Well indeed I do that, I am not sure of whatever I am doing. Remember - I am just a guy, who was in a hospital not more than a day ago.. well somewhat along ten to thirteen hours ago, or a bit more. Hard to tell. Even though I have approximate knowledge on things, I had no actual Idea of what I was doing.


    If a homeless person from Earth would see me, he would share his clothes with me.. I had a sack for pants for fucks sake. Better than no pants, but still.


    Well, with the spear done - I didn''t have anything to do any more. I wasn''t planning to use the glass pieces for the time being, unless I absolutely had to. Using one of those to just peel the bark off the stick was already a waste? Why? Well.. I could have used my teeth to bite it off, but I thought of that too late, as in just now.


    The night has finally shrouded everything in darkness, the small light from the fire was like a little island in the endless black sea. What''s more, now that it finally became this dark, I understood that in reality, there were animals in this place. I could hear faint rustling in the grass, something small was moving around. Small was good - small wasn''t as scary as medium-size. Occasional splashes from the direction of the water notified me that the fish that inhabited the pond-lake, was a lot more active during the night.


    It''s a good thing that I had a fire. Not because of the light or the warmth in the chilly night it provided, mostly because I could stare at the dancing flames. It was mesmerizing enough for me to completely shut off any thoughts. At least a few hours passed as I stared at the slowly fading fire, until finally realizing that it was dying out. Trying to set it up in the complete darkness would be rather challenging. That sounds ridiculous, forgetting yourself while looking at the fire. My mind and my body however, were tired - so I''ll blame that, not like it would change the fact that my dumb ass just barely escaped losing the fire.


    "People learn on mistakes.... But I have to think ahead. A simple mistake could cost me my life.." - I''m not really the life loving type, but I was through too much shit so far to allow myself to just die for some ridiculously stupid reason, or giving up. Hours have passed and I was thinking on what to do during the day. Going on without at least some schedule or plan didn''t seem like a good idea, but I wasn''t the best at something like planning ahead. I never had a diary or even an event planner thingy of any sort.


    I sat on the log in front of a dim fire, drawing on the ground using a thin stick. I didn''t draw anything in particular, just some random shapes. It helped me think, like when you doodle while talking to someone on the phone, some people do that. The night was boring, but I didn''t mind, boring was welcome right now.


    "Should I scout the area tomorrow as well?" - I asked the darkness, whispering lightly. Seems like the darkness didn''t want to answer the crazy guy, don''t blame it. I wouldn''t answer a person like that as well.


    The night passed, and with it - my hopes of getting back to my old life. The now and here was my life, I had to think about not dying, not hoping for miracle to happen and everything becoming better. Life didn''t work that way, never has. I looked up, through the opening I could tell that the sky was turning lighter. Soon it would be enough to see, well - according to my estimation - in four to five hours it will become a bit lighter.


    The time was indeed different from home. Not only the day was long, but the night as well. I was sure, I counted.. for at least four hours I counted seconds. Fourteen thousand three hundred and ninety four to be exact, got tired of counting and stopped. From the time that it became completely dark to this moment, quite a bit more than eight hours have passed. My inner clock will have trouble adjusting to this place, the natives probably are used to the cycle, but I would eventually get tired if I kept working during the day and sleeping during the night. Not like I was planning to, or was able to sleep any time soon. I had to be exhausted to sleep without the nightmares... but if I would be in a deep sleep, I couldn''t keep an eye and an ear on anything that could come at me.  Sleeping with one eye open wasn''t a skill I had, but I had to learn being aware of my surroundings even when I sleep.


    I could see the sky becoming lighter, light enough to see the ground if the fire wasn''t here. I threw a whole bunch of sticks in the fire, couldn''t afford for it to die out. Spending two to three hours trying to re-light it would be a total pain in the butt.


    "Good morning to me.." - I stood up while grabbing one of the pieces of cloth that I had by my side. The new day has started, and I had to start working on crafting the new me. I wish I had a better start, but then again everything could have been far worse, it always can be. My hands moved the bushes aside as I made my way out of the hiding. The pond was still there, twenty or so meters away from the spot I''ve spent the nigh in. Not too far and certainly not too close. I had to clear my head and start improving the conditions I was in. I didn''t have that much time before the literal deadline.


    Still a lot I don''t know about this place, but eventually I will figure everything out.

 Chapter 5: Morning

    Back home it is rare that you see the world in its true colors, for most people. Wake up in the morning, and the streets are still lit up, filling the gray pavements with the warm yellowish light. I was used to this sight, but with no streetlights the mornings looked different, and not by a slight margin.


    The slight clearing the pond provided allowed for a bit more light to pass through, however most of the forest was filled with a heavy smoke looking shadow. It was nearly physically cold, but only nearly - it was still warmer than any summer I lived through. If during the daylight forest was filled with slightly dark greenish color, with the turquoise moss brightening the ground, while the sun didn''t provide that much light - it looked quite grim. Everything looked desaturated, as if almost all of the color was removed, leaving mostly gray with a tinge of blue. It''s strange to admit that during this hour - the lush green forest looked a lot like the city landscape, dull and cold.


    I was sitting on the ground, scrubbing my body with a wet cloth. The cold water was sending shivers across my skin. Of course it seems like in the situation I was in - skipping on washing myself wouldn''t be such big deal, but for me - it was force of habit. You wake up, you go wash yourself - simple as that. Water didn''t have any metallic scent, nor any traces of chlorine in it, clean and untouched by anything as far as i knew. It was refreshing to say the least, ice cold - not the temperature of water I would use to wash my body. My sack-pants were lying a little bit away, as I took them off - not going to wear wet clothing first thing in the morning, summer-cold is the worst.


    My teeth chattered a bit, but I wanted to wash myself clean. Somehow I felt dirty, not because of the brown dried bloodstains on my feet and shins, not even due to the dirt and sweat covering my body. I simply felt pathetic, and the feeling stuck to me for the whole day yesterday, it stuck like rancid smelling glue. Washing myself was just a way to get the last day behind me, forget it without letting it slip away from the memory.


    As I scrubbed blood off of my feet, coloring the flowing water in dirty-red, I was studying the tattoo on my hand. The lines were fine, however there was no feeling of discomfort, no swelling, no blood, it was a mystery as for how it was made- more importantly, it was rather doubtful that the pattern on my skin was man made. Ridiculous, but that''s the illogical conclusion I came to. If you get a tattoo - you will be feeling at least some pain, followed by red skin, blood and a lot of healing until it looks right. The thing on my hand seemed to just appear out of nowhere, with no sign of actually being tattooed. I first thought about being under some sort of anesthesia, moved, branded and then thrown into the forest, though that possibility once again seemed unlikely.


    If I was under the effects of some drug for a long time, there would be withdrawal symptoms. But I felt perfectly fine, despite being magically teleported to a different location. Here I was, sitting in a puddle of ice-cold water, washing myself and thinking about the fact that there was likely magic involved in this whole scenario, and not Pen and Teller kind.


    The mark on the backside of my hand seemed to have no purpose whatsoever. I tried tracing the lines with the tips of my fingers, pressing on it, scraping and shaking the hand - no reaction proved that the tattoo was just that - a tattoo.


    "Ridiculous.." - I couldn''t cope with the thought that the mark on my hand had no apparent purpose, besides being a cosmetic feature. Everything had to make sense, but this- among many other things - didn''t. I was used to games having some sort of logic, having a system behind it, making sense and providing a sensible plot-line, even if you had to think about it. This made no sense for now, the grumbling stomach, on the other hand - did, besides the interest in the tattoo faded quite fast, mostly as it didn''t provide me with more fuel to spike my curiosity.


    Had enough time to think in the "shower" I hurriedly put the pants back on, of course there was no-one around, but it didn''t feel right to be stark naked in the middle of the forest. Even less logic to my actions - I once again chewed on the purple-maple leaves and smeared the paste on my skin, not covering everything this time, just a few spots here and there. I could once again smell only the wet moss, but most importantly - the tiny buzzers left me alone. These insects were the number one reason for me to avoid nature in the old times, maybe I should have coped with them though and got a higher tolerance to their bites or something.


    Droplets of water were dripping on my shoulders from the unkempt curls of my hair. The light brownish hay bale on my had wasn''t cut for a long time, but as far as I knew it was still the same length as before, that''s another point to the fact that I couldn''t have been unconscious for longer than a week - my bangs would reach further than my nose. I let go of the strand of hair from my bangs that I lined along the bridge of my nose, as if using it for scale. The strand bounced back into a wavy form and aligned itself in a seemingly random direction. I simply swiped it away from my forehead and the curls grabbed onto each other somewhat holding in place, not falling onto my eyebrows, or into the line of sight.


    My head was messy to say the least, hopefully there were no tics in this forest, getting bitten and possibly sick - wasn''t anywhere on my agenda.  I could look for the tiny black suckers on most of my body, but if one would crawl in my head - it''s "Gee Gee", only hope was- that the moss would scare them away, or it would stop drinking my blood, as it''s filled with all sorts of lingering shit. My stomach seemed to curl on itself, it felt  a bit nauseous, just like old times.


    I crawled through the thick bushes back to the little "camp" and threw some sticks into the fire pit, keeping it burning, so that I won''t have to relight it. My palms were already blistering from the yesterdays'' stick-spinning, as such I would really appreciate the fire burning for as long as it was physically possible. Each time I clenched my fist, it seemed like I had a hard rubber glove on my hand filled with nearly dried wax, that was due to the whole lot of rubbing my palms went through to start the flame. I grabbed the poor excuse for a spear that I''ve made during the night and made my way to the water.


    ....


    OK, maybe it all looks nice and easy when someone capable or even somewhat experienced tries to fish, however I struggled. I felt fatigue from the physical workout, and my breath wasn''t as calm as it should be. Standing ankle-deep in the water, I was holding the spear - ready to strike a fish when an opportunity would present itself, it seemed more like someone trying to copy something he''s seen on TV, like a kid mimicking a character from a game or cartoon. Looking like you are fishing is a lot different than actually fishing, but it was a start, and I didn''t expect much really. The sun reflected from the surface and blinded me, disrupting my aim. I really thought of the Polaroid glasses as the greatest invention ever, one that I didn''t have on me of course. To be honest, it''s not like the sun was to blame, I wasn''t great at trying to stab a moving fish.


    I didn''t go deeper into the water, mostly because there was no need for that - the fish were circling in the shallow waters. They swam really close to me, nearly scratching my feet with their fins - seems like they really didn''t care at all. My hand struck the spear down, as one fish seemed to be close enough for me to strike, but the tip hit the muddy ground instead. Quite far away from the place I was aiming at, judging by the position of the target.


    "Huh?" - My brows curled a bit, which made me look like an angry owl - yes the eyebrows of mine were quite thick, light though - so I didn''t look like someone bushy brows'', an I didn''t wear a green jumpsuit.


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    Nevertheless, I really thought that I hit the fish spot on, then the realization came. Water bends light, so anything below the surface was not as close as it seemed, as well as the angle of the throw had to be adjusted, it is common knowledge, but somehow I forgot about it. Knowing something and applying the knowledge was quite different. Hitting the target appeared to be a little challenging, but people did so for thousands of years, so I could do the same..probably. It was harder than right-clicking with a mouse on the tiny creatures on the computer screen.


    So, the next twenty minutes were spent entertaining the inhabitants of the pond with my seemingly useless struggle. I was able to adjust to the way water distorted the view, however it didn''t accomplish much. The fish were really nimble, and as my spear hit the surface of the water, they moved their body away. They were just too fast for me and I couldn''t predict their movements, as they just reacted randomly - well, I didn''t see the pattern yet.


    To add insult to injury - the fish didn''t mind my feet at all, knowing that the feet wouldn''t attack them, and even if I would try to stomp on them - they would just move away, in fact they did so a few times as I was losing my temper. I couldn''t strike them when they were this close to my feet, the risk of stabbing myself was real. Somehow it seemed that I was more of a threat to myself than anything in this place.


    As half an hour of failure passed, I was somewhat out of breath already, spear-fishing seems quite tiring to the body, as I was breathing heavily. Seems I was in worse shape than first thought and already had to take a rest, I could feel the blood rushing to my face as it lit up, my ears were also burning. I looked like a sweating tomato - not a pretty sight if you ask me, nor appetizing. My feet were stinging a bit from the water, probably caused by the small cuts from when I moved through the bushes in and out of the camp.


    Having failed at acquiring food, I moved to a different task. I could just take a quick rest and try again, but my temper would make me anxious of failure and more mistakes would be made, so moving to a different, less strenuous work it is. Multitasking, or multi-failing in my case. I moved back to the stream for a quick drink, and visited Mr.Tree to think about politics for a little bit..at least my kidneys worked fine.


    "I will have to get an actual semblance of a toilet..well, make one, not get.. when I finally manage to acquire food I can''t go shitting everywhere like an animal..no.. even animals in enclosure use a single corner for it.. " - Having decided that digging a hole some distance away from the camp would be wise, I immediately didn''t do it. Hurray to procrastination and being a blabbermouth, or easily distracted by my own thoughts.


    Still hoping to find some easy food, thinking positive is so cute,  - I decided that it would be good to scout the territory I was currently in. To be honest, I hoped for some easy source of calories, like a bacon-tree...or a drive through in the middle of the forest. I wasn''t used to not be able to eat when I wanted to, you can say I was spoiled in that way, but quite a lot of people are the same. Lame excuse- but hey, made me feel a bit less helpless.


    Once again I returned to camp, just to grab a piece of cloth and a few black coals. As I didn''t have a knife, I had to use some other way to mark the direction on the trees. The glass was out of the question, I decided not to waste the only cutting tool I had for simple tasks, so I took the coal to use as a makeshift pencil. If I didn''t even do that - I could get lost in the woods in no time, and by that I mean immediately. A few steps among trees a little spin  and congratulations - you are lost. I''d rather not get lost, especially when I had found a source of drinkable water. Imagine finding a pile of gold, going to get a bag and never being able to trace your steps in reverse..maddening.


    My fingers pushed a black coal to the light-gray tree bark, leaving a sideways "T" pointing the flat end to where my water source was located. I could draw an arrow, but that would be too obvious, paranoid mind didn''t let me act this simple. Not like a whole bunch of other signs wouldn''t bring anyone with eyes to my camp. Everything would be so much easier if I had some sort of previous training, but unfortunately all I had was the random knowledge from the internet - don''t get me wrong, I still felt like half a Rambo.


    By the way, I didn''t move in a straight line, rather - in a squarish spiral. Less chance to get lost like that, if only because you stumble around the same area quite a few times, so you start to recognize the surroundings even if a bit. Walking through the forest barefoot was still not really enjoyable, but as I focused more on looking around, and less on the branches sticking into my foot - it became a bit easier. The thing though - walking in circles around the pond-lake, which wasn''t that large, was still time-consuming, it took me a few good hours to get far away from the water.


    I could hear the wind rustling the leaves somewhere at the top.. well- that''s it. Other than myself, I didn''t make anything out from the noise. While looking around, on the other hand, I was getting familiar with the flora of the area. Long grass, which grew in patches amongst the moss, was quite hard to the touch, as if sandpaper. I could use it in some way, but if I tried to pull it out - it would just cut me eventually. Not quite worth it, so I just noted the green, thin and long grass in the mental encyclopedia of things and moved on.


    Other than young thin trees and bushes similar to those I was residing in - there wasn''t much. A few bushes of purmap, amazing name I know - Purple-Maple was too long to my liking, and a lot of moss, that was dry and  brittle where the sun touched it''s surface.


    I have found something that a first looked like a curly bush, but happened to be simply one plant with a short stem and a lot of long curly leaves, which were rather soft to the touch. I ripped one off and tried biting it, immediately getting a disappointed look on my face. I couldn¡¯t bite through easily and it felt like trying to chew on a cotton ball, the fibers in the leaves were really similar to cotton. I immediately thought about a certain use for them, and as such called the plant paper-leaf. Once again toiletpaperleaf was rather long. The stem was hard as a stick, and I decided against biting that, kind of fearing that my teeth wouldn''t last otherwise.


    I decided to call it a day and return to camp...easier said than done, as it took a few hours tracing through the woods looking for my marks and figuring the way to the camp. I did it though, and was feeling a little tiny bit of pride for it.


    I returned back to my fire, which was still smoking, and put the little pile of paper-leaf plants near the log. They were easy to fully pull out of the ground, so I took four of those as I was going back to camp. I still had the whole day, and somehow - avoided returning back to the pond where the evil fish would get the better of me. You can say I was trying to avoid failure by avoiding the job itself, which of course was just a temporary solution, shitty one at that.


    While the sun was still somewhere far away, and the cool morning air prevailed, I didn''t even notice that it was getting a lot hotter every minute. The air heated up rather fast. I was sweating from every pore of my body, quite literally. It wasn''t unbearable, more like - unexpected. Seems like I will be making a lot of trips to the stream with the heat in the picture.

 Chapter 6: Statistics and Fishing

    I never enjoyed fishing before, seems like I will not get a feel for it any time soon. Being hot, not in metaphorical way, was already driving me mad and with the sun shining both from the top, as well as the reflection in the pond - I was being slowly roasted by the natural oven. I don''t know quite when, but at some point I found myself simply staring at my own reflection in the water. It  wasn''t even two days, or day cycles rather, but I already looked quite beaten up. Dark circles under the eyes and the tired look on my face was present for the last five years, so it''s nothing new. Bed-hair that looked more like a straw bale than a head of a person was already dry, even though I''ve shoved it into the stream to cool off. My chin was covered in patches of short facial hair, I didn''t shave that often so it already was about a week since I last used a razor.


    "So I will grow a beard here.." - Growing a beard wasn''t something I ever achieved, as I lost any patience when the beard started itching. I doubt I would be able to manage shaving with a piece of glass.


    My skin was already turning from pale-white to light-red, if I keep staying under the sun for long periods of time, I will either burn to crisp or.. well there is no other option. I don''t tan that well, so I will have to deal with sunburns as well.


    The fish didn''t want to get caught, at all. Every one of the lunges I did - missed, though I was able to scratch a fish once. That was about three hours ago, my progress seemed too slow. If that goes on, I will get weaker and eventually starve. I couldn''t get to the birds that were so far up, that I couldn''t even see them. Only the noise from their occasional chirping and flapping. I really wished for a dummy guide to surviving in a fantasy forest, though it didn''t seem so much fantasy to me, other than new environment I was yet to see anything supernatural.. other than the two mutant midgets from before.


    On that note, I was getting used to the sounds of the forest.  Seems like my mind is slowly getting used to the information flow, and separates the sounds that it recognizes. Before it was like listening to a mash of sounds, but now, I could tell about a fifth of the sounds apart. I didn''t get any skills, just got used to the fucking mishmash of subtle forest sounds. That''s what happens when you suddenly have no background music - you hear the ambient environment a lot more, and trust me - it seemed like static from TV, disorienting to say the least.


    Before sitting down into the shade, I made a little detour and collected some thicker vines and a few long, thin branches. Even resting should be used for something, otherwise I would get nothing done. So, I started weaving a basket, which was easier than I really thought. Well - actually it was a fishing trap, but it begins in the same way as a basket. I had seven long thin branches, which I tied together on one end, so that I could start weaving the vine around them. It is important to have odd number of ribs for the basket. If you take an even number, you will not be able to weave in a pattern I was going to, well it''s not like I knew more than a simplest pattern at all. Simple is good though, simple means it is doable, plus even if you don''t know the intricacies of the task before you, or don''t even have a guidebook, logic is your best friend. Weaving a basket is the same as assembling furniture from IKEA - get your shit together and hope for the best.


    I simply tied a vine in a loop to the base of the seven ribs, then started wrapping it around the sticks. Under one, over the other, go on and repeat until you make a full circle. When you come to the rib you started from, you will notice that according to the pattern you will have to go over it, whereas you started by going under. That way, the pattern repeats itself every two full circles, making a simple basket.


    When the piece of vine runs out, just shove it firmly between the previous layers, it should hold just fine, then take a new one and continue from where you left. Sooner than later the monstrosity that I was making started to look sort of like a basket. Shaped like a cone, it would most likely do just fine as a fish trap..well, if only I had some bait to put inside of the construction.


    When you complete the cone, you should take the ends of the ribs and bend them, shoving the sticks between the vines. This way, they will keep everything from falling apart. The basket won''t look amazing, but it should do it''s job. With the cone ready, all that was left to do- was to make a smaller cone with the tip sewn off, but that I left for later. It was time to get back to fishing, as the sun hid behind a cloud.


    I entered the water, ankle-deep as usual and froze ready to strike with the spear. And once more I got consumed by the process and didn''t notice the time pass. Focusing at one task at a time can be good in some situations, however this wasn''t the case.


    Strike with the spear, fail, get back into position and wait. The cycle repeated itself and so did my failures. I scratched a fish by it''s hard scales a few times, but it was still kind of hard to hit. Probably some of the people in a similar situation would excel and catch a few dozens of the scaly torpedo, but I wasn''t the capable one. Practice makes perfect, and this was exactly what happened. I mean I practiced and was as far from perfect as it could be, missing and even losing balance a few times, falling into the water and scaring the fish away. They returned right back, either they were mocking me, or they thought I wasn''t a danger.


    I wanted to prove the fish wrong, but they were right, I didn''t pose a threat to them. Despite all that, there is another force that applies when repeating the same process over and over and over again, and no, I''m not talking about insanity, even though I wasn''t far from it. I mean statistically you ought to get a lucky hit once in a few thousand strikes. Plain and simple - if you throw a thousand coins in the air, eventually one of them will land on its rib.


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    What I am saying - I finally hit a fish with the four pronged spear. Piercing its eye with one of the sharpened edges, not killing it, but pushing it into the mud, where it flailed and wriggled, trying to escape. I held it tightly in place with the spear, not believing my eyes. Food. I immediately grabbed it with my hand, and as hard as I could I threw it in the direction of the shore.


    Here a lot of things could happen - I could have failed and lost the fish, thrown it in the opposite direction, but instead something unimaginable occurred. Everything went smoothly. The fish was lying on the moss flapping about, suffocating without the water slowly, and as frozen in place as I was from excitement, I rushed towards it. I had no hammer, or a stick thick enough, plus I didn''t want to leave it on the ground while I look for one. So I grabbed the fish and hit it on the tree, making a hard thud noise and feeling it tense up and remain that way, only to relax after a few more hits. Back home I would probably get a bunch of people yelling something about animal abuse and being vegan. I don''t care about the feelings of the fish, it would just be hard to cook if it kept jumping like crazy.


    The thing about fish - they are slimy, just how slimy they are I understood while trying to gut it using the piece of glass. It slipped all over the place and grass started sticking to the scales. My fingers were trying to hold both the piece of glass and the fish in-place, not as easy as it seems, especially when you try not to cut your own fingers. Next to that I wasn''t the biggest fan of the smell, and as you could guess - the fish smelled quite strongly. It took me far too long to finish removing the guts from the lucky fish, but I didn''t complain - I would have something to eat. Right after I roast it.


    "Goddammit.." -My head tilted in the direction of the sky, a sigh escaped my mouth. With all that fishing and trying to become one with nature I forgot to keep an eye on the fire. Which was already long burnt out, still warm, but with no orange embers in sight. I threw the guts into half-made fishing basket and dropped the fish on the ground. Again- I lost track of something I had to do. Even the fish I caught wasn''t a good enough excuse in this case, I wasn''t  that mad at myself though, mostly annoyed.


    So - the spinning of the stick began once more, this time though -it didn''t take two hours to start the goddamn fire. Not like I got better at it, probably the fire-sticks dried out a bit during the day. The air was rather dry actually, so anyone could start a fire. Quarter of an hour later the flames were dancing, poking from the hole in the ground, and the fish was leaning towards them from the stick that was jammed right through it. I wanted to eat it straight away, but it still had to cook for a while. My rumbling stomach was not making the process go any faster. The burning wood cracked inside the fire, the little droplets of fat from the fish occasionally dropped onto the orange coals, turning into a black spot that seared a tiny jet of flame.


    I sat there for a few minutes thinking about what other tasks I had to do. More importantly - what I had to do which didn''t take that long.  Digging a hole didn''t seem as it would take a long time, so I stopped on that. Even using only a stick and my hands- making a hole for the future use as a toilet was a minute task, or about five-minute task. What caught my attention during the digging, was the way earth felt. It wasn''t brittle and falling apart, rather sticky and somewhat oily.


    "Seems like clay, and quite a bit of it to be honest.." - The task was complete and I made my way back to the fire through the bushes. There really is a lot of walking around involved, maybe I couldn''t sit down and relax due to the nervousness and stress. Nothing just seems comfortable.


    I was just in time for the fish to be perfectly cooked...as if. I had to sit and watch it for ten to fifteen more minutes, until I could somewhat say it was cooked.  OK, at the time I wasn''t thinking about one specific thing - that the fish could be poisonous. I mean - everything could have been poisonous if you think about it, but what other choice I had? Not eat? Doubt it, really. It was a necessary risk.


    So I ate the fish. Burning my lips and tongue on the first bite, as it didn''t cool off yet, but then taking my time, slowly picking out the bones. The fish had nearly snow-white soft flesh, which was still a bit moist with the juice. It tasted quite bland without any seasoning, though a bit of an earthy taste was present, however I was eating and that''s what important. It was pure bliss, food somewhat secured - I was happy.   But what''s more - it was already nearing evening, a surprise that caught me off guard. Seems like my fishing really took a long time, and to top it off as I sat there eating, the fatigue hit my body like a truck. Every muscle ached, and my head was heavy. With the day being that long, it seems like it took more than twenty-four hours to catch a fish, more than that - I didn''t sleep for over two normal days, so my mind was shutting down. I didn''t even put away the leftovers, and the charred fish skin was still tightly clamped between my fingers.


    It wasn''t something I could control, I nodded trying to keep my eyes open, but as I let them close for a split second, I turned off completely. It was a gamble - would it be safe to sleep, or I would regret that immediately. There I sat- on the log, with my face down and a mostly eaten fish in my hand, seems like I didn''t let go of it.

 Chapter 7: Sleep Rationing

    I woke up as I heard the water splash quite hard, the fished were more active during the night, splashing around. The sound startled me. It seems like I slept for good three or four hours, as the fire was tiny and barely noticeable. Nothing a few sticks wouldn''t make better.


    My mind was still foggy and tired, but it was now easier to keep myself from falling asleep. Seems like everything was in-place, and I wasn''t attacked. I saw the fish-bones on the ground, so I threw them into the fire, I didn''t know what to do with them right now. The basket smelled of fish, I remembered why only a few moments later. I was still confused as to where I was, but slowly my mind caught up and the whole picture became clear.


    "Oh right.. the fish trap" - Seems like brain decided to finish the half-made basket first, I didn''t mind at all - go brain! You know your shit best.


    Making the cone with no tip was a little bit harder than the basket itself, but the process was really similar. As the night crept through, washing the heat away with it''s dark waters, I sat near the fire, weaving in the same manner as when I made the basket. Some trial and error was required to make the top part, but after a few hours and three burnt failing attempts, I made a somewhat decent doughnut-shaped cover, which would allow fish to easily enter the basket, but due to being narrower on the inside - would cause trouble for them to get out. Simple trap for simple creatures. One issue though, after the fishing session, I wasn''t sure that these guys would fall for it. They did seem quite capable. Either way, I have attached the top to the basket, shoved a few sticks to hold it in place and left it be, the guts of the fish slowly rotting away. I really hoped that the fish would smell them and go for the easy food, but that would have to wait until the morning. I wouldn''t leave this place right now, the camp felt a lot safer than the outside, so I stayed.


    Truth be told, I worked on the fish trap during the night, only to wake myself up and not fall back into sleep deeply. I had decided to come up with a way to ration my sleep throughout the day and no other option came to mind so far. As it was, I was going to cut the sleep into smaller increments and spread them throughout the day.


    As I sat in front of the fire, I fell asleep once more, but with no fatigue to keep me knocked out, I saw the nightmare again. The same one I''ve seen the other night. With the memories still this fresh, it felt real. It kept repeating itself in reverse, sped up and looping. I couldn''t take my eyes off of it, and as such - I woke up covered in cold sweat. As you would expect - my heart was racing. Waking up from a nightmare was always followed by the same feeling of anxiety and irrational fear, but for me at the time, the fear was rational - the things in my nightmares were real and lurking somewhere. Hopefully far enough from where I was.


    "Seems like I don''t have to worry about sleeping too long.. oh lucky me.." - my voice sounded quite tired in my mind, that was a sign that all this shit was taking a toll on me. Well it''s that and the fact that my stomach was grumbling as if I ate some really spicy food. Even though the morning was a few - six hours away, it was already light enough to make out everything on the ground. The darkest time of the nigh has passed, so I took the make-shift toilet paper, and waltzed through the bushes.


    As I faced the hole I dug, curses came from my mouth. I nearly forgot that there could be clay in the soil here. It would be really bothersome to get my own shit out of the way if I would do what I was here for. Well - seems like there is more digging to be done, so I took some stick, moved fifteen steps away and dug a smaller one. Business had to be done -so yea.


    New food can be annoying to get used to, and seems like it would take a few more trips to the hole to get used to the fish from the pond-lake. On the other hand- paper-leaf was a great substitute for toilet paper, soft but sturdy enough not to rip off too easily.


    I felt a bit of a chill, as well as slight fever. Sunburns were setting in, and as such - I went to the stream to drink. Usually when I get sunburns- I feel the slight fever, and what''s strange, my body feels cold even though the surface of the skin is burning up. I really hoped for it to get cooler, but it''s not like I could control the weather or something. While it was still bearable, and the sun didn''t rise - heating up the whole forest, I took the spear and went towards the pond bringing the trap along. I sunk it, digging the base into the mud a bit, so it wouldn''t randomly pop-up on the surface and went along the coast to make some distance between myself and the basket.


    Splashing noises occasionally accompanied my muffled grunts, as I was trying to spear some food for the day, or a few days. My hands burned, and I knew that by this time - the blisters were getting bigger. Despite the discomfort - I kept at it, as I wanted to catch something before the sun starts burning the living hell out of me. Apparently I have to get used to this, unless the fish trap works, all of my food will be coming from this pond.


    "What''s worse - I have no way to preserve the fish.. I think that drying fish still requires a lot of salt... note to self: if you have an option to choose a location where you will be stranded - choose something close to the sea. " - no way of preserving fish meant that I was stuck in a loop. Catch the fish, cook it on the fire - it will last one to two days maximum, so I have to catch more fish. That could become troublesome really quick.


    My hands clamped up from exhaustion, despite that I had to keep this up. Quick rest wouldn''t hurt though. I was still not used to this sort of exercise, well i was less than a week. Somehow it felt unnecessary to make such an excuse - it was simple, I was unfit - I had to overcome the muscle-sores and do what it takes.


    The sun was already past the horizon. I didn''t see it, but it was getting a lot lighter, so you don''t need to be a genius to deduct this. Well- probably the other reason I didn''t see the rising sun is that I wasn''t looking in its direction, water and the fish dwelling within it were my only focus. Somehow the noises of the environment didn''t dim or get quiet, on the contrary I could pick up a lot more sounds from the top of the trees. I bet these were birds, the chirping was present at all times. Seems like I was on alert even during fishing - that''s really handy, of course if it isn''t limited to the bird calls only.


    Slap. The tip of the spear pierced the water and submerged instantaneously. It wasn''t rocket science after all. I caught a fish - the spear pierced it from the side, dead on in the middle. With enough practice you inevitably get better.


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    "Simple analogy would be any video game with some unusual controls. You are struggling in the beginning, getting confused and disoriented - as the game uses something different from what you used before that. The more you play, the more you get accustomed to the controls, and soon after - the movements become natural, so you don''t even notice them." - I pulled the fish from the water, it dangles a bit, but the spear pierced some vital organs, so only a few weak spasms were the only movement it produced.


    "When you get a hang of the controls, you begin getting better in the game. Soon after that it becomes apparent if you are just a casual scrub, or a normal player." - I threw the fish on the shore, it landed with a slight thud on the moss. Getting better at this game was my plan. It was a bit taxing on the body, which is an understatement by the way, as the palms of my hands looked like I was bitten by a few dozens of bees. I just hoped that these will be good blisters, not those that rip and eventually start bleeding. Yes- I was hoping for callous hands, it was better than coping with all of the skin from the palm peeling off.


    More splashing of the water, the result wasn''t a lucky shot, as after less than an hour I caught another scaly motherfucker. Twice the result from yesterday, quite good. The sun was up, and the heat began rising quite fast, so I didn''t stay in the pond, which would heat up, smell and reflect sunlight straight in my face.


    Yep, the pond smelled fishy to say the least. Even though I wouldn''t drink from it, and would strongly advise against it - the fish was quite delicious, but that''s my hunger speaking most likely. I doubt that there was any food I wouldn''t find amazing right now.


    Two fish- two times the gut cleaning. Love it, hate it, doesn''t matter - it had to be done, so I did it, cleaned the fish and set it up near the fire, to cook. The guts from it  would accompany the previous batch in the fish trap. I really hoped that the fish would go for the guts of their comrades. It''s not like fish had anything against cannibalism, as far as I know. I mean I''ve seen fish in the fish tank eat each others fins, and that''s off of a live one. But the fish of this world could be geniuses for all i cared, either way I was going to catch them and eat them. Unless they beg me for mercy - I won''t show any. Sitting on the warm ground cross-legged, I thought about some really useless things while waiting for the fish to cook.


    As I had nothing better to do, I went to the shithole I dug during the night. Good thing I remembered about it in the morning. Or- instead of clay I would be facing something less appealing. Well- the ground had a greyish color to it, and was a bit hard - like hard old cheese. I took a few pieces of the gray stuff and returned to camp, wetting a piece of cloth while I was near the stream.


    "OK, so that really is clay." - Seems like I was getting a habit of talking to myself in my mind. I looked at the pliable piece of dirt in my hand, it was strong enough not to fall right apart. I quickly made something like a cup from it. Like - because it looked like a dog made it, and as far as I know - dogs don''t make cups. It looked horrible, but nevertheless, I wasn''t after aesthetics. What is important to find out - if the clay I found could be fired. Having clay available would change things quite a bit. For one- I could get some water boiling, and with the fish available - I could make a fish soup. No more wasting the scales, bones, fins and heads, everything will fill the water with the godly fish taste.


    "I am hungry for more fish? Hunger does show a middle finger to the pickyness" - It was somewhat strange, as it''s not like I was such a big fan of seafood or anything back home. Fish wasn''t the least favorite food, but it wasn''t in the top ten to be honest. The sudden food preference changes seemed somehow unnerving, but I didn''t pay much attention to that.


    The cup was left in the shade to dry. If I would try to fire it right away- it would explode from the inside due to sudden water evaporation. Not literally explode like a bomb, but rather crack and ruin all the efforts.


    "Smells nice" - I sniffed the air, fish was ready. Moving closer to the fire-pit, I moved the cooked food away from the heat, removed the sticks that I used to prop them up. After I wrapped my dinner in the paper-leaf leaves, unused paper-leaf leaves, I left them on the log.


    "Quick nap and back to work" - I closed my eyes, feeling the warm ground with my back. Having a log for a pillow wasn''t comfortable, but I forced myself to sleep. Well - as expected, I didn''t sleep for long, however there was no screaming in my head anymore. The dream was silent, which didn''t change the fact that I saw the same scene over and over again. It''s not the blood and gore that gets to me though, its the fact that I was helpless, that I just left someone to die like that. I was no hero, never will be, but this shattered all the self-confidence I had. I doubt I could have done anything... but what if it was someone I knew, what if it was someone dear to me? That''s what keeps me jumping awake from this dream, the feeling of disgust towards myself. Hating yourself and still wishing to survive, ridiculous stuff - once more I felt dirty.


    I washed my face a few times in the spring to completely wash away any sleep remaining. If I could stop myself from falling into the deep sleep - I would be a lot more aware of the surroundings. Like when you hear every noise in the house in the morning, or when during the night a door to your room opens - creepy, but that''s a hospital for you.


    With no apparent need to catch fish for today, I decided on taking another scouting trip. Moving a bit further away from the pond into the forest. I think that was the bit of laziness showing itself at the time.


    "Though I shouldn¡¯t move that far away from the fishies" - I stretched a bit as I gathered a few pieces of coal into a cloth and filled the fire a bit with firewood. Thinking about fish, I found that my mouth was salivating like a Pavlov¡¯s'' dogs hearing the bell.  - "...and the water stream of course.. seems I am really getting exhausted here."


    I looked at the pile of dry wood near the log - it would last until tomorrow afternoon more likely, so I will have to make a few wood gathering trips. Will do just that on my way back from scouting, and then have dinner.


    As such - I took off into the forest, to the edge of the marked territory.

 Chapter 8: Woods Are Not Desolate

    The forest was in shade, yet I was already sweating like crazy - good thing I had the water from the stream, not on me, but at least in my system.


    "It won''t allow me to move far away from the pond.. I wonder how far is the closest.. civilization...The man had to come from somewhere, but he was quite battered if I think about it.." - Yes, remembering the bad things was my forte, I was quite experienced at it. Real question though, why didn''t I pay attention to these details at the time? Well... being scared shitless was a decent excuse.


    Considering the body shape of the man, he couldn''t have ran for a long time. Call me judgmental, but he was fat.. I doubt he could keep the pace he had for more than ten minutes - so he had to come from somewhere close. I really doubt that he was any sort of important figure - as someone would come after him..well the toads did come, but that''s different.


    "It doesn''t seem to be anything similar to The Predators movie... really, hunting an ex-cancer patient can''t be considered good sports. I would laugh at that to be honest. It''s like bragging that you hunted a deer that died before you even took aim." - Being in a different world was certain, but I still thought about a reason, about any sort of explanation. Seems like making assumptions on what was the process which caused me to be in this place, was the favorite topic in my thoughts, along with food, probably second to food.


    "People do disappear on Earth, but the stories about time-travelers and other shenanigans seem to be a bit ridiculous. Oh... that''s new"


    My eyes fixated on a small - arm-length sized bush with tiny pinkish berries on it. Don''t get me wrong, there were a lot of bushes around, quite a few patches of grass as well, some purmap and paper-leaf, but mostly - dried moss. Seeing something as fertile as a bush with berries could be considered an achievement. The scarce vegetation - could it be because of the dry heat?


    Well- thoughts about plant-life aside, I knelled down to take a better look at the plant. I smelled the air near it, it was a bit sweet, but I wasn''t going to jump and eat the berry right away. Well- the drill to determine if the plant is indeed poisonous wasn''t exactly a hundred percent deal, but smearing on the skin, leaving some under the tongue without swallowing, and finally eating a little bit was the best choice I had.


    Of course I had the godsend of fish, but if I continued eating them without limit- I would exterminate the whole population. Even though I wanted to indulge myself in gluttony and eat all the fish I could, common sense told me to shove that wish somewhere far away. Other sources of food were needed. I could be considered a retard when it came to coming up with a straight plan, most of the things I do aren''t quite planned, but intuitive. To be short - I suck at planning.


    So without further hesitation, one of the berries was smeared on my hand. Waiting would take too long, so I continued walking.


    It was quite noisy in the forest at the time, which I thought of as strange. You see- living in the city, you are constantly surrounded by all kind of sounds - not that subtle. So you can say my hearing was just adjusting to the volume slowly. I could hear my own footsteps, which seemed quite noisy - imagine eating cereal without milk, that''s what every step seemed like to me. It was annoying to say the least, I rather preferred to not hear the crunching sound - so my struggle to walk at least somewhat silently began. So at the moment- I had to remember a few things just to walk - avoid sharp things, look where you take a step, feel where you place the foot before stepping... that''s already a lot, now add proper placement of the foot to reduce noise. I wasn''t walking fast, shuffling through the hot furnace of the forest, looking for any sign of edible plants.


    Periodically I would stop to make a sign on the tree closest to me. I was moving away from the known location, so I made a mark every twenty to forty steps I took. A few times I walked back to the previous tree, just to be sure I could find my way back. Losing the camp wasn''t a good plan, it was the best I had available to me. Of course it was just the third day.. I was getting confused in how much time has passed exactly, as sleeping in small increments of time made it rather hard for myself to remember how much time has passed exactly. It was obvious that the day was longer than the usual twenty four hours, but I didn''t know by how much, well - I didn''t bother as it wasn''t useful for me, or rather - I had no idea how to use the information even if I had access to it. When it was dark it was night, when it wasn''t it was day, easy peasy.


    What astonished me quite a bit - was the fact that even though there was an occasional opening in the forest, the tree branches would cover it up almost completely. Only something like the pond-lake was wide enough to let the sunlight pass through the opening above it.


    "The berry doesn''t seem to have any effect.." - My hand didn''t seem to be different, no red marks, no signs of irritation. The spot didn''t seem different, In fact - I couldn''t feel the place where I smeared the berry at all.


    "Holy shit.." - I poked the spot with a thin stick I picked up, all of the sense of touch was gone. I could feel the pressure, but that''s it - the hand was completely numb in the area. - "So.. Do I try to chew on it?"


    I was hesitant, for all I knew- this wasn''t a good sign. I doubt that eating a lot of painkiller-berry was a smart idea in any world. Such a long name again... Numb-berry it is.. Numb-berry was noted as a possible anesthetic plant, and I nearly yelped as I came around another large bush - these were the same ones I camped in, no name - just bushes.


    What made me nearly jump and duck in the bush - a herd of animals. They were quite a bit away, but the slow movement between the trees caught my shortsighted eyes. I slowly crept towards the movement - just out of curiosity. The fact that the shapes were constantly stopping to bow their heads, seemed like an indication of a herbivore... of the floor was littered with the corpses of their slaughtered enemies and they were nibbling on the bloody remains. Staying positive was necessary.. I could be cautious and stay in the bushed for the rest of my life, which would be short and uneventful, but that seemed like almost giving up. Saying- life, please get it over with and stop my suffering.. Fuck that, I''d rather shove a cactus up my ass than give up like that.


    If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.


    "But you were wasting your time locked inside of an apartment staring at the screen for the whole day..


    Fuck you me.. I was a fully functional person who could pay his bills and keep living like he wanted to.


    Secluded from the society.


    I was communicating with people online, thank me..


    Oh. Sure, saying fuck you to EULA''s and making some small coin from games, as well as the at-home job of an accountant.. with NO proper education.. you were living a dream..


    I was living the way I wanted to.. " - arguing with myself, I really need some company here, or not... I''d rather not have any company if it would want to kill me. Oh the dilemma.


    I crept closer to where the animals were. The fact that they didn''t run away yet - was a great discovery. The wind was blowing on the back of my head, so the animals should have already smelled me, but they didn''t show any sign of noticing me.


    "Oh the great purmap - you are the best deodorant in the world." - Seems like the plant was not only useful as a mosquito repellant, but it also covered the odor of my body. As in completely covered it. Wild animals probably had at least somewhat good sense of smell, so I was pretty confident that was maybe right..


    "It works fifty percent of the time, every time." - Yes, that''s the sort of things that randomly pop up in my mind for no reason, as well as the moments from random shows and movies, episodes of manga and books. Too bad that I can''t control it, I could at least stop grinning like a fucking retard for no apparent reason, as I remember some short dialogue from South Park or something..


    My steps were quite silent, but apparently not silent enough. The closest of the animals suddenly popped its head up, looking in my direction dead on. I could feel the goosebumps flowing through my back and crawling up my arms.


    "Please don''t aggro.. " - the animals took of jumping just like deer, or something similar. I exhaled, a bit disappointed that I couldn''t get close enough to take a better look at them. They did take off - so they saw me as a threat, or at least a nuisance, which once again meant that I wasn''t the prey here, but rather the hunter.


    "A shitty one, but hey... " - This encounter made me more confident, or at least not shitting my pants afraid of every shadow in the forest. There was an animal that was more of a pussy than me, hurray. More importantly, if the tiny amount of chewed leaves could cover up my


    smell to this degree, what would happen if I prepared it properly?


    I walked around the place where I''ve seen the deer-like animals, only to find a few round clumps of dry weed. Once I realized what I held in my hands- I immediately unheld it... shit.. deer shit.. amazing timing brain, the realization had to come after I grabbed it, thinking why it is this warm to the touch. At least I didn''t try to bite it or something... walking around with an aftertaste of shit in your mouth, that would be a new experience.


    Something else was apparent - there was something like a hill up ahead. What I planned when I started walking to its top? Like hell I knew.. It was a spontaneous discovery, and the same with the decision. My legs started talking shit about my mother after just a few minutes. It''s one thing to walk on straight ground, but the whole other experience - walking uphill for long periods of time. Once again, my muscles proved to be not as used to physical exercise, figures.


    There was a lot less large trees as I climbed higher, I could tell by the amount of direct sunlight that blinded me. Oh how much I love the sun..not. As I got tired and took a quick rest in the shade of one of the smaller trees, which by the way looked climbable, I understood the plan I had. I could make out a lot of green through the trees in front of me, with a hint of blue. I was already above the tall trees, so when I reach the top I could take a better look around. Maybe there''s a city not that far away and I''m trying to survive in some park like an idiot.


    Good thoughts are a great motivation, so despite aching feet I continued my road to the top of the hill. There were almost no plants by the time I got to the top, only some dry grass. It was brittle, so it crumbled as I stepped on it. That''s good news, because what I could see from the top of the hill wasn''t. In all directions - only green plants, and even bigger hills surrounding the place where I was standing. If you imagine a not so perfectly round bowl, that would be the valley I was located in, and if you imagine a tiny nipple on the bottom of it - that was the hill, and some even bigger nipples were littered here and there. Even if there would be pathways made by sentient beings, any villages or anything similar, I couldn''t make anything out from here, the tall trees covered everything in a carpet of green. I wasn''t able to make even the pond-lake from where I stood. There could be a city with skyscrapers on the other side of the hill for all I knew, but there could also be none.


    The reality is harsh. I had no way of knowing where to go. What''s worse - that was my life from now on for all i knew. A hermit in the woods, living alone.


    "Well.. that''s it huh? Not the worst that could happen.. just permanent camping in the woods." - I was walking downhill, slowly, as the struggle to keep myself from making excess noise was still going on. I was still able to hear my steps, but it was getting better. I collected a whole lot of Numb-berries which I wrapped in the cloth I carried the coal in, so that''s a few handfuls. My plan for now was to continue with getting to know the area better, come up with any good ideas, get some fish..or other food.


    Cold water coursed down my throat as I drank directly from the stream. The whole scouting process made me quite dehydrated. My feet were feeling like someone swung a baseball bat a good few times at the muscles. But I still had a few tasks to make, for one - I wanted to get more fish.

 Chapter 9: Unexpected

    "They know" - OK, I get that catching fish is a gamble for the most part for someone of my skill, but this was getting ridiculous. I''ve returned from scouting and almost immediately started fishing, but to no success. What''s worse - I got so occupied by the process that I''ve lost any track of time, only noticing when it was getting darker, and I mean two to three hours Earth time until the late evening when it''s hard to see almost anything in front of you.


    You could describe what came next as hectic rushing from one place to another. As if my pants were on fire and I was running around to find a fire extinguisher. I had to do a lot of things in the remaining time, for one I had to relight the campfire. Good news- it took only a few minutes to do so. The bad news however - my hands were blistered from the constant use of the spear for god knows how many hours, some of those ripped and now stung from every touch.


    I really got consumed by the fishing, or rather I couldn''t think of anything but eating fish at the time. What''s worse - there was only one cooked fish left, as I ate the other one just before I went to fail at shoving a spear into the water. I really thought that catching a few more fish would be easy, but it wasn''t. I got too confident after catching mere two fish by luck, thinking that I could replicate the success. Being wrong isn''t great, being wrong in a situation like this can be disastrous.


    The night was spent doing mostly nothing, as I wasn''t able to figure what to do and what resources were necessary to make any more tools in the time I had. Losing track of time cost me quite a bit, besides, I was getting worried that the one cooked fish was the only food for a while, the Numb-berries were too suspicious to eat, the paper-leaf wasn''t edible as far as I thought, and eating grass or moss seemed pointless.


    I was now standing in the morning sun, with a spear in my hand, once again, trying to get some more food. The source was not secure at all. The fish weren''t big in the first place, and having only one meant that I would start losing a lot of strength soon. How long will I really be able to go on for? A week? I doubt that I would be able to continue fishing with no way to refill energy. Two weeks is a period before dying.. I doubt anyone who lies on their deathbed will have any power to stand up and fish for hours.


    The fish avoided my throws, as if they suddenly invested into evasion stat. I doubted that was the case, but their movement was different than before. They knew of my presence for sure, and avoided every throw I made. Yes, I''ve gone so far as to try throwing the spear if the fish was a bit out of reach. My stomach hurt and I felt hunger more than ever before, I had to force myself not to think about the cooked fish I left at the camp. I had to somehow ration it probably, but I didn''t know if I could trust myself with that.


    I literally thought only about fish. I would stand in the pond for hours, failing at getting food, do some other tasks - like gathering firewood, or getting bark off of the stems of the bushes for later - to make cordage. But that''s it, I wasn''t able to think straight for some reason, I was sweating during the night, my stomach was turning and every joint in my body hurt. It wasn''t anything I ate, because I didn''t eat anything that day. The fish was left for the next day, to get some energy for the coming day, so I felt horrible.


    I was lost to what caused this condition, but it''s not like I cared about the causes. I wanted to eat fish. I sat there, moving my line of sight from the flames to the leaves where the fish was.


    "It will spoil soon, I shouldn''t wait for that.. eat it now, a good course of action yes." - My eyes were bloodshot at the time, I didn''t get any sleep for the whole day, evening and good half of the night, hunger was keeping me up and awake. I couldn''t sleep, my whole body was trembling as from a fever, even my skin hurt. I could have had a heatstroke from being in the sun for the whole day, exhausting myself. I didn''t care about that, trying to come up with any reasons not to eat the fish right now, it wasn''t easy to do. I bit my nails to the point that three fingers started bleeding from the corners when I ripped a piece of nail along with a tiny bit of flesh. Red droplets covered the nail along the rim, smearing across the skin wherever I touched.


    It was one long night, but as I saw the surroundings get lit up by the morning sun, I''ve grabbed the fish. The patience had its limit, and my limit seemed to be long gone. I had to eat, it was the only possible choice here, nothing else was an option. My hands ripped through the flesh of the fish, and with shaking fingers I ate the cold white fish-meat. It wasn''t juicy as at the time I ate it right after cooking, it was also still bland. My mouth salivated like crazy though, I ate hastily while trying not to choke on the bones.


    Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.Once I finished eating, the feeling of hunger died off, together with the trembling, the pain in the joints remained, but it was bearable. I felt better, the thought of what just happened and my actions sparked in my mind, but died off  really quickly.


    "God.. if that was simply getting hungry, I don''t want to know what I will be doing after a week of this." - I thought that I had a heatstroke and my body was under a lot of stress, which caused it to crave for food more than usual. People will begin to lose their minds from hunger, it was proven in human history on multiple occasions.


    "Seems it''s quite easy for me to lose mine.." - I felt displeased with myself, giving in to hunger so easily seemed like a really spoiled behavior in itself.


    I started the day by doing other tasks before getting into water. I gathered wood and collected more fibrous bark. I was getting anxious that I will get hungry for the fish once again and start going insane once more. It didn''t happen though. It was somewhere in the middle of the afternoon when I felt my stomach ask for some more food, but it was a weak call, nothing like the insane hunger I felt during the night. It was a possibility that something else completely caused the symptoms, getting sick would be a step towards disaster, but at least I got myself an explanation. My mind was a bit at ease, just a bit though.


    I slept as planned during the day, the exhaustion from the sleepless night allowed for a few  dreamless hours of sleep. My head felt clear as I continued with the day, it''s like nothing happened. I was going on with the tasks. Of course fishing was the majority of them. Fish, do something else, fish again. It was a priority of course, I wasn''t able to find anything else edible in here.


    I sat staring into the flames once it got dark, I wanted to make sure that no more hunger madness would come. It didn''t seem to, which seemed odd. I was hungry, but not like that time, not to the point of seeming insane to myself. I was confused, but at the same time - relieved. My eyes moved from the fire to the big pile of curly strands. It was the prepared and separated bark fibers, which I collected during the day, mostly to get fish out of my mind. It did help, but I was left with a ton of fibers to process.


    It was first time for me making rope, but the process wasn''t something completely difficult. I sat before the flames and pulled the pile closer to where I was. My fingers separated a few long strips, which I then gently bent in half. Holding both ends, I twisted the one which I held in the fingers of my right hand clockwise - making it wrap on itself, spiraling the strands firmer together. Then I switched the twisted strand from my right hand to my left, by twisting it counterclockwise around the untwisted end which was previously in my left hand. Repeat the process and if everything was done correctly, you will eventually see a rope forming. Once the untwisted strands become shorter, add more in the same fashion, by taking a bunch of fibers, bending them in half and adding to the ones you were twisting.  That''s all there is to the rope-making, twist the half fibers in one direction, then twist both ends in the other, not rocket science.


    It''s a tedious and slow process, but I was able to make quite a bit of rope out of the bark fibers, and what''s more - it was quite sturdy. Making rope was soothing, you didn''t have to think of anything, just keep alternating twisting one end with twisting both, and not fuck up with mixing up the directions. One - clockwise, two counterclockwise, repeat. My fingers moved as I was sitting scrunched up in front of the fire-pit. Before long, I had a whole thick coil of cordage, which was undoubtedly stronger than the vines. I bet I could come up with some uses for it, but at that moment it was nap time according to the schedule. The last nap before the new day, once more - I forgot to count how long has passed since my arrival.


    I sat with my elbows on my knees and my head on my palms, trying to sleep. I thought about the fact that I was running around like a headless chicken, not having a plan. Planning was important, but how could I do other tasks while the food situation was getting out of hand. Oh great - you have built a house, but ended up dying from starvation because you didn''t allocate enough time for food.


    It was getting chilly, I felt my body tremble a bit, but before long - my mind went blank and I fell asleep. More attempts tomorrow, though I will have no breakfast this time. I will hate myself for eating the fish and not leaving anything, but that will be the whole new day..

 Chapter 10: Failure

    Falling asleep feels rather good, but falling awake is a completely different thing. Feels scary and unexpected, plus confusing. During the sleep I kept leaning to my right, until finally lost my balance and started falling. If you watched a certain movie about dream inside of a dream, you will know the falling chair theory they used there. The thing is, while you do wake up, it doesn''t mean you will have the lightning fast reflexes necessary to regain balance and not hit your head on the fucking log you were sitting on. Best alarm ever - a log to the head, jolt of pain, a bit of adrenaline and not a speck of sleepiness in your eyes.


    I automatically threw a few sticks into the fire while trying focus my eyesight. The fire didn''t die out, so it seems that I slept for two or so hours - yes, my way of telling time wasn''t quite accurate, but it''s not like I could count down seconds and minutes the whole time, certainly not while sleeping. My fire was sort of accurate, which was enough for me - if it dies out - three to four hours have passed, if the coals are cold - even longer.


    Soon the day would show it''s colors and I could start with the survival tasks once again. More fishing, I couldn''t be happier.


    I stood up, scratched my head, somewhat taking the dirt and a few tiny pieces of bark off of my hair. The morning was here, my skin felt hot from spending a lot of quality time under the sun previously. Today I was determined to get some food, I would spend the whole day in the water if necessary. Having food right there in the water and not being able to get it was killing me. Yes, not the hunger, not the heat, not the fact that I was still wearing the fucking sack for pants, the inability to do something that I was able to do once. I was tilted for sure. Call me salt-master now. Does a salty person on-tilt care that he is who he is? Nope. He simply goes on doing what he was doing.. or that''s usually what I did until I blew up in rage and go smoke to cool off my head. I was OK with the ridiculous situation, but wasn''t OK with being outwitted by the fish. The longer it took me to catch a fish, the more energy I wasted for nothing - well you can guess the rest. Effectiveness of hunting goes down, my chances of living go down twice as much.


    With a spear in my hand, I stood in front of the pond-lake. I already knew each and every reed that grew close to the shore, in fact, I was one step from starting to name the reeds that stood out from the masses. I could tell that it was a certain part of the lake just by the nasty smell. It was a bit different depending on the amount of reeds growing, the degree of bitterness to the smell of vinegar or rotten wood was different in the smell in different areas of the pond. In regards to the reeds - they were similar to cattail, but blackish in color, somewhat desaturated, dirty-green in color. They separated the shallow waters from the deeper part of the pond. I didn''t go swimming in it at first because I was cautious, but right now only the smell of the water stopped me.


    It reeked of rotten wood with a bit of vinegar in it, really doubt that people would be allowed to swim in something like that. What''s worse - the water seemed oily, so the smell stuck to the body, and the sack-pants once wet smelled like I puked all over them. That''s the main reason why I left the pants on-shore and stepped into the water wearing nothing but my birthday suit and a layer of anti-mosquito plant chew.


    Failing three days straight - I didn''t want it to happen. Lets say - hunger doesn''t help with staying calm when you see food swimming around.


    "The issue is.. they got smart.. or they were smart from the beginning and no-one actually ever hunted them before." - The fish in the pond-lake was moving quite fast in the shallow waters, spreading out. This way even a lucky shot was impossible - they were too spread out to hit one fish while aiming at a different one. To add insult to injury - they dodged my spear like ninjas. The moment sharp ends of the spear touched the surface of the water, the scaly bastards wiggled out of its trajectory. My throws seemed sluggish compared to their movements, but at least they didn''t turn into logs or anything.


    ....


    "How many throws today? Four or five hundred? Or a thousand? Fuck I lost count..." - the idea of taking count of the times I threw the spear in an attempt to catch a fish seemed like a good idea at first, however it soon became - "the amount I failed" and my composure began to slip away. I didn''t get out of water to rest, seems like being pissed off makes the adrenaline cloud all feeling of tiredness you accumulate. For now of course, undoubtedly I would feel this passionate fishing bite me in the ass sometime later.


    How many failed attempts are necessary for you to get angry while performing a task? For me that number was somewhere in the thousands, as I was boiling while going on with the now meaningless and rage inducing task. My face was quite red, either from the sun, or from the amount of blood that rushed to my head as I was getting angrier. My heart was racing, and the throws were performed with all the power I possessed, lacking the accuracy though.


    The fished moved away from the mess I was making and swam closer to the fence of reeds, some moving into the deeper waters. Of course they would, I was this close to catching the food!


    "Fuck it... fuck you and you" - My own voice seemed distant as I growled in whispers, my body was feeling sluggish and hot - sweat dripping from the tip of my nose. My joints were aching a bit, and feet felt a bit stingy. This added to the frustration and anger, enough to spark rage into combustion. The fish have gone too far, both metaphorically and literally. They moved to the deeper waters, where I could not reach them. What''s more - I could even see them move slower there, swimming around as if nothing mattered in their life.


    I was angry, almost to the point of fire spewing out of my ass. Step after step, I closed in towards the reeds barrier. Only one thing on my mind - kill the fish and eat them, even if I have to choke them with my bare hands and skewer them onto the spear manually. Moving deeper into the lake, first waist deep, then up to my chest - the water was kind of warm even at this depth. If I couldn''t catch the water-dwelling ninjas from outside the water, then I will attack them where they least expect it.


    I was too angry to notice that I was feeling sick my body trembling from something other than anger. I dove into the deep waters, immediately feeling my eyes burn. The feeling like when you accidentally get shampoo into your eyes, and I don''t mean foam, I mean shampoo or a piece of lemon. If fucking stung, but I was a few meters underwater once I realized that I fucked up. How the hell was I supposed to strike a fish with a spear when my whole body is affected by the water resistance? My behavior was so irrational, that the fact that I didn''t take notice on such a change had put me into a state of terror.


    Something snapped and bit my right hand, the sound echoed in my head before pain struck me. I''ve felt sharp teeth pierce the skin and dig into the flesh. I nearly opened my mouth to scream, but was able to hold it, only puffing a few large bubbles out of my nose. My eyes opened in shock, the pain from the bite overpowering the stinging from the water. The size of the bite was around the size of a really big cat, however it wasn''t any sort of fish, it was something different. I just had to jinx it.. why did I ever think aloud that there was no sign of this place being a fantasy world...


    "A snake?" - My eyes made out the thing that bit me, it was still clenching my forearm tightening its grip and moving around. It looked like a snake with a clam for a head, ridiculous and at the same time somehow terrifying. I jammed my fingers into the gap between it and my flesh trying to force the mouth open. As I did so, I felt that it was indeed hard like a shell, with muscle lining insides of it''s mouth.


    "No..nonono" - My thoughts turned to panic as I saw the movement of its body, better to say - bodies. In the darkness of the murky waters, where its long snakelike body led to, was a whole bunch of movement. Not fish, but more of the same greenish-black looking snake bodies coiled into a huge mess. It was like vines - growing from somewhere deep in the water. Like tentacles lined with clams covered in thorns, they squirmed around as if feeling the water, mixing it. Everything about what I''ve seen was terrifying, but the biggest issue was - the size, all of the clam-heads which I could make out in the murky waters were quite a bit larger than the one trying to pull me deeper.


    For all I knew, the one that bit me, was just a tiny sapling compared to the main stems. It was terrifying to think that these things will come at me and rip my body apart piece by piece. I cut my fingers, but kept trying to release my hand from the grip, feeling like a rodent caught in a mouse-trap. Using the bit hand as leverage, I was able to force the clam to open its grip a bit, that was all I needed.


    I was finally able to rip the clam away from my hand, along with some of my skin. I still held the spear tightly, as if the badly sharpened stick could protect me. I could feel the water pressure at this point, my ears were ringing already.


    My body kicked the water and I hurriedly swam up, accelerating towards the surface - which for some reason was really far away. The thing pulled me deeper before I even realized it, and the darkness was the only thing surrounding me. I swam like mad, trying to move as fast as possible, but another snap, a whole lot louder thundered as shock wave inside of the water. My left wrist was bitten by a force of a bear trap, large thorns missed the bone by a miniscule distance. It was one of the bigger tentacles, which I felt not only by the force it bit my hand, nearly breaking it, but also by how easy it started pulling me underwater. I felt water burn the inside of my nose, as my air supply was already at it''s limit. The pain spread through the wrist, up my hand and into the shoulder, it was sharp and there was a lot of it as I felt my bones creaking at the point of giving up to the pressure and shattering like a wine-glass hit with a hammer.


    I turned to face the monstrosity, only to find out it didn''t have a face, just a solid bony-white shell. My body moved on its own, fear clouding everything and pushing me to act fast. Probably that''s what matters when you look into the darkness which will be your death. I hit the clam monster with the spear, struck it inside of its mouth where soft muscle tissue was tightening its grasp on my arm. I couldn''t break through the stone-hard shell with a stick, nor could I force it open. Piercing its muscle was the only chance I had, do it or die...no.. I''d do and die trying to survive.


    It wiggled me like I was but a tiny rat in an eagles beak, but for a short moment it let the trapped arm go. It was enough for me to rush to the surface once again, feeling like my lungs were about to explode, my vision was getting a bit too dark. I was almost to the surface when another snap caused me to stop for a fraction of a second, as if stuttering before continuing further.


    "It missed.." - my face broke the surface tension of the water, but I didn''t stop, as I rushed through the water, the reeds and to the hard ground. It did follow as I heard it splash behind be, but I was able to move far enough for it not to be able to reach me. My feet felt the dirt, clouding the water as I ran tripping and falling, not caring to be silent. My gasps were deafening myself, but i fell onto the moss ten steps away from the shallow waters.


    I lied on the dry crusty moss, which crumbled under my weight. My body shook in spasms as I coughed vomit-tasting water and tried to regain my breathing. I sounded like a strangled donkey, somehow there seemed to be no pain from my wounds. I blamed shock and adrenaline.Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings.


    I tried standing up, but it was hard - nearly impossible to do right away. I pushed myself up from the ground - that''s when I noticed something off. There was too much blood on the moss - as if someone spilled a tiny bottle of dark red paint.


    "Something''s missing" - the realization struck me as I looked at my left palm, which was bitten last. There was no pinky and the ring finger was also missing. Blood was streaming from the wound, but even as that I could see that only a piece of bone - half a stump of the third part of the ring finger- was the only bone left there. Some flesh and skin still dangling, but the bone is cleanly ripped out. The little finger gone completely, and there was only a tiny stump in the place where the finger was previously.


    I rushed to the water stream that was just a few steps away to wash the wound, but just a few seconds into the process something flipped inside my head. The pain slowly started reappearing, I understood that soon I will be squirming in agony, unable to do anything but bleed out and die. On shaking legs I pushed myself through the bushes into the camp, for the first time being outraged by how hard it is to get through. The pain was near, but my mind was long gone, I could barely understand my own actions and logic behind them. My ears were ringing as if someone put a microphone to a speaker.


    I grabbed the cloth the Numb-berries I gathered were wrapped in, some of them fell on the ground as I struggled to hold them in my shaking hand. Without hesitation I threw a handful of them inside of my mouth, my whole body was shaking - most likely from the blood-loss. As I chewed on them, I started to lose all sense in my mouth, but my head became a bit lighter, the taste was horrible and bitter, but that didn''t matter at the time, I could cope with the pain - that''s what important. I swallowed some of the chewed berries, spitting the rest on the Paper-leaf leaves, that I would use as a bandages. My mind began to float like a boat on waves, and I was barely holding onto being awake - it was just a matter of time until I lost consciousness.


    Tending such an injury wasn''t something I experienced, nothing came to mind, but I had to somehow stop it from bleeding. I forced the skin and flesh back together, covering it with paper-leaf bandage and tightening it as hard as I could. Numb-berry mush was forced onto the wound, making the pain go away for now. I applied layer after layer of bandages, until it looked like a ball rather than a hand. I then covered the right hand with some bandages as well, which just stuck to the drying blood, as the wound already started to clot, unlike the left hand. My whole body felt tingly from blood loss, but I forced myself to crawl to a bush, bringing a coil of cordage I made the other night.


    I wrapped it around the branch of the bush, making a sort of a noose, which I used for tying the left arm in a vertical position, and then it hit me like a motherfucking truck. Both pain and something else completely.


    The reality seemed to drown in thick sirup, crumbling away and running off into the sunset. My vision became blurry and twisted, the ground started to spin and I nearly thew up from the unexpected movement. Bushes were laughing, pointing their long fingers at me, while the fire giggled in its crazy laughter. My insides were on fire and I tried to scream, however it didn''t work. Through the spinning vision I could make out the pale berries on the ground, they jumped in delight, looking at my misery. My throat wasn''t there, they stole it along with my voice, and now they started crawling under my skin, stealing the pain away. The thieves, they were stealing everything from me.


    My face tasted of blue and the sky sounded like cheese, the whole world made so much sense now, and I was so ridiculously blind this whole time. Everything was flowing and dancing around me, but I was just sitting there spectating. I could see myself staring at myself, I could hear my hair grow out of my head.


    As I saw my face drip away into the ground, the truth presented itself to me, the fire shaped itself into different figures. My thoughts became visual and tangible, I could taste my fear - it was a bit sour and metallic, or that''s blood.


    The whole reason the fish were acting the way they did, as well as the smell of water - it all came to me. Yes, the flying beaver-pig was right, I was stupid not to notice, but now, now I was smart and flowing through the cracks in the ground like freshly grated cheese on hot spaghetti.


    The fish are working for the clam-plant, it''s all their intricate plan to bait me into the deep waters, and the pond is not a pond - it''s a giant stomach, waiting for walking candy to drop itself into it''s grasp, where it will drag you down and slowly melt you away. The fish started acting strange because the plant told them so, it could tell someone was hunting in the stomach, so it told them to lure me in. It poisoned me to lose my mind, that mad plant. It took my sanity away so that I was dumber than the fish, it took my time away to make me hasty, it made me crave for more of that delicious meat so that I jump into the deep waters where it could reach me..


    Everything started to move faster, speeding up like a crazy merry-go-round. I wanted off, I was falling to the ground from my seat, my feet turned into mashed potatoes. I didn''t feel them, the same as I didn''t feel anything else, only my face was above the anthill. I was laughing silently as the tiny legs dragged me deeper into the ant-city, eating out my eyes. I didn''t feel anything though, it went dark and silent all at once.


    ....


    I felt something go up my throat as I barely turned my head and felt vomit flow through my open mouth and nose onto the ground. It was still dark, I understood nothing. Fucking hospital, was I in a hospital again?


    The light turned on as I forced my eyes open, seems like my eyelashes got glued shut - hurray, more pain. My head was ringing and I had the worst hangover ever, everything was wobbling and spinning as if I was on a boat, seasick and high at the same time. My body ached all over - as if I was beaten with iron bars, it seems I''ve been moving quite a lot when I lost consciousness, or even before that. The ground was beat up with marks from my feet lining it in a completely chaotic pattern - feet covered in dirt and only god knows what else. I didn''t think about that.


    I freed the hand I tied to the bush to lessen the blood flow to the wound, it hurt a lot - but mostly from the skin that had rope burns on it. I knew that it would hurt, didn''t mean I was appreciating the feeling though. The whole arm was covered in red leaves, which were greyish when I tied them around the wound beforehand.


    "I thought dry blood was brownish in color..not bright" - Well- the forearm was half brown from the blood that dried on it, so I seemed to have lost a lot of it, the leaves however were a bit of a mystery at the moment. A mystery I didn''t have time to unravel.


    I was sweating like a waterfall, unsure if from the pain or the numbing berries that caused me to suffer the aggressive high. Don''t do drugs kids - some distant voice rang inside my head, far away - just a recollection of something I heard a number of times- enough to get tired of it.


    I felt sluggish still, but that was understandable, I wasn''t sure how I was able to still remain conscious. That could wait, I had other things to worry, first - how the hell was I supposed to walk if I was unable to stand up. My feet were shaking - void of any power, and as I couldn''t stand up, had to move through the bushes on my knees, forcing my way through.


    I made it to the stream, avoiding to look at the pond. Fuck the pond, fuck the fish and fuck the thing that dwells there. How mature of me, I know.


    I lied there, letting the cold water flow around me, sipping as it touched my lips. Yes, just laying in the way of the water, with my head on the ground, sipping water together with bits of earth, I didn''t mind - it was still the best thing ever. Only now I was able to tell that the water I considered clear- had some slight taste, I couldn''t tell what it was exactly. I was thirsty as never before, and the taste qualities of the water didn''t matter to me, so I drank as much as I wanted to before sitting up.... well.. trying to sit up, it would be a pain to watch this pathetic struggle. I had to change the bandages... probably, but first- clean the wound somewhat. I wasn''t a doctor, so whether it''s a good idea to touch such a wound - I didn''t know.


    The stream filled with dirty blood from the bandages as I was letting them soak, which would allow me to remove the leaves. One by one I unwrapped them from my arm, but I didn''t expect what I saw.


    No, the fingers didn''t miraculously grow back, I am not as lucky. What surprised me was the net that separated itself from the last paper-leaf I removed. Like someone glued a bunch of string to both my hand and the leaf.. It was a fibrous net that held the skin together tightly, coiling inside the wounds and piercing skin and flesh.. It could be bad, in fact it looked gruesome and dangerous, but it held the severed skin and flesh together on both of the wounded hands - the idea of a plant growing into my body was a bit scary - but I feigned ignorance.


    There was more to it though. The edges of the wound secreted transparent fluid that hardened as it came into contact with the air, but got soft as it touched the water and washed away quickly. It looked like wax, and probably was the only thing that kept me from bleeding out dry, then again.. if something as viscous was flowing though my veins - how the hell didn''t it clog anything.. causing me to die.. like hell I knew.


    "...fuck.." - was the only thing that I could whisper while grasping the whole situation once more. I nearly died twice that day. I ate some dangerous plants while being half functional, which probably was the reason for the insanity that followed through the night.


    "I could have cauterized the wound.." - something like that was possible, but while suffering from deafening pain you don''t think about causing more harm and pain to yourself. I didn''t.


    It took some time sitting in the cold water until I was able to pick myself back together, the close call was a dodged bullet, but I doubted anyone could dodge a bullet twice in a row. I had to reapply some fresh bandages to the cleaned wound, then think some more.. my head was still killing me, so thinking was a struggle. I walked in and out of the camp in the bushes, a bit hesitant as of what to do next.


    "Where did I leave my pants?" - I walked along the shore, looking for the place I took my pants off. They were left on the moss, yes walking with my ass exposed all this time, not the top priority to notice it right away. As I''ve put them on, I remained in place, sitting on the moss, looking at the top of the trees. I quickly glanced towards the water, then away, the pond was a lot more dangerous than I thought.


    "Fuck the deep water - I won''t take a single step into the pond"


    The fish were bait, the whole pond was an enemy waiting for its prey.. They avoided me when necessary, inviting to hunt when they moved slower. The issue is - why did I fall for it? During the trip everything seemed to make perfect sense, now - I needed more than just random assumptions. The answer came to me eventually, the theory at least.


    The only time I''ve started losing my mind, was when I remained in the water longer than half an hour or so. It was probably the effect the acid-juice of the plant had on me. Losing sense of time to get more intoxicated by the contact with the juice, get agitated to follow the bait, be intoxicated to act irrationally, be weakened by the poison so that the giant Trap-Plant could drag you in and feast on the fresh flesh. Craving for the fish after you eat one also helps with catching prey. Nature is scary- and this fantasy nature is even more so terrifying.


    I sat there, looking at the arm wrapped in bandages, thinking that everything could have been worse - far worse to be honest.


    "I can do with three fingers on my left hand, not like you use the other two all that much.. It could have bitten me somewhere else, which would be a lot worse. Taking a foot off, or biting my dick.." - the last thought made me shudder, yes, definitely I was lucky.


    The shock was subsiding and gradually completely winding off from my head, that''s when real questions were asked. I rushed to my camp once again, as I thought of one detail - I didn''t know for how long I was knocked out..so the fire could have died out... that would be a disaster. Or not. I could try making the fire with only one hand, but I would prefer not to. Needless to say - I nearly tripped over a few times, my muscles still sored and lacked any energy..flailing around the whole night was tiring.


    In the pile of white ashes I was able to dig out a few slightly-red coals. My heart nearly stopped when I saw the fire as it was just a little white hill that was just slightly warm to the touch. If I was late to get to them, there would be no way to re-light the flame, not in my current condition.


    "Thank god and praise the sun.." - I rushed around the camp as much as I could possibly manage to, however soon a small flame signified success of my attempts to save this little ray of hope.


    Now was the time to get my shit together. Seeing a person die was shocking, but nearly dying myself was a true wake up call. I thought survival skills will improve as I go on, but in reality I had no time for that. I had to think everything through and be a lot more careful.


    "...next day after the incident.." - I''ve started to count days, as I lost track before - that day was the starting point of the true beginning of my survival, well the beginning of the true life here. The shit just got real, even though I couldn''t even imagine how real it would get, or even worse - how unreal all of this was going to become.

 Chapter 11: Half the Speed - Twice the Plans

    It was strange to see the world around me from this point on, as if I was looking through my fingers, knowing that this place is not home, not Earth, pushing this knowledge into the back of my thick skull, ignoring it. Losing some of those fingers made me realize - I was going through this whole thing wrong, rather unable to act differently. Call it instinct, or fixation on reality. Everything was a whole lot less logical than I thought... If I was a lost person in the woods - I''d be just fine, but I was some place different and unknown... I should not have behaved as I did. I didn''t pity myself, not in the slightest, well... maybe just a bit.


    My eyes watered from looking at the flames, eyelids and forehead becoming hot from the radiating heat. Smell of smoke was always rather pleasant to me, even now it was comforting. Even in this dire situation, only a few minutes alone with my thoughts, staring into the bright dance of the fire, was enough for me to regain my composure. That and the fact that my stomach decided to announce that I was all right and hungry. My fingers dug into my own skin, as if trying to choke the loud and obnoxious organ into silence, I already knew that I felt hunger, no need for the rumbling and pain.


    "Still no food...." - Well, some people are more talented than others, as for me - even in this situation I had only a semblance of a skill-set and a grain of knowledge. I was too overconfident in my own skill-set, too much unneeded bravado nearly cost me greatly. Simply put - I would miss food even if it was laying right before me.


    Something that I planned to use as some sticks or a source of thatch - has caught my eye, well - eyes, as I still had both intact. Yes - the paper-leaf stems, they looked a bit soggy - a bit rotten maybe, but that''s the point. They looked soft enough to eat. Though my thoughts changed as I picked one of the stems with the good hand. It was still solid as a stick - albeit a bit more springy than before. Considering I was already dying from starvation slowly, I nibbled on the stem. A little bit unexpected, I''d shout food ex-machina if I''d see this same situation in a movie.


    "Fuck me under and over with a broom handle..food" - the stems weren¡¯t solid after spoiling for some time, they were edible, a bit crunchy and chewy, but fucking edible. I never imagined that I would be so happy to feel the taste of raw onion in my mouth. If it behaved in a similar fashion, then roasting the new food-source would make the paper-leaf stems even more delicious, caramelized and sweet.


    It''s not worth explaining how tasty the slightly roasted stems were, especially for a hunger driven, injured person on the verge of loosing his mind. I''d settle on - bloody fucking amazing. Something was a simple piece of dry wood, became food after a few days lying in the shade, not unseen in my old world, but truly not something I''d expect right now. Somehow my stomach felt as if I''d eaten a lot more than I did, probably the stems were a bit heavy on the stomach right now, but I could live with that.


    Without further delay I decided to stockpile the stems a bit, if they required a bit of lying around - then better start early. My injury was no excuse to stop working, besides it wasn''t as painful at the moment, rather painless and a bit itchy.


    ...


    "Fuck!" - I cursed out loud. Lack of pain has tempted me to use the injured hand to assist with ripping the ugly sack pants into strips of fabric. Really bad idea.. just as I clenched the injured arm, the pain struck me on a few different levels - first, the dull feeling of radiating pain pulsating through my bones, then the burning sensation of needles ripping my flesh. Pulling the wrapped hand to my chest, I stepped on the sack-pants with my left foot to aid with ripping. No time to rest, no time to pay attention to the pain.


    "This is my life now.. deal with it motherfucker.." - my right eye twitched a little, seems like everything is leaving a strain on my mind already. I could still taste the metal in my mouth as I clenched my teeth, trying to calm the outbursts of frustration and anger. Really a mess of a human..


    The sudden desire to rip the sack-pants was easy to explain. I wanted to carry the paper-leaf stems, and doing so just by hand-full would require a lot of walking back and forth. Hence the grand half hour project - crafting a "backpack". Of course I could deal with a few stems and call it "good enough" but fuck that... no more "good enough".. "extra" and "in abundance" were the only valid options from now on. I had to improve the conditions I was in.. not accept the shitty situation. So a few strands of fabric tied and twisted into an impromptu rope, as well as some vines, sticks and any other debris I could get my hands on got used up in a few minutes as a backpack was beginning to form. Nothing fancy - just a simple upside-down "U" shape made from flexible sticks, along with some "ribs'' for sturdiness. Fabric from the sack-pants became the shoulder straps, as it would last longer then the vines I found, which I decided to coil up and use to bind anything I was going to carry. As I thought - it took around half an hour from start to finish, so I didn''t waste all too long on the crafting.


    According to plan - I took of in the direction of the paper-leaf patch closest to my base-camp. Even though one of my hands was useless, I still carried a thick club-like stick in my right hand. I wasn''t going around unarmed any time soon, so a weapon was going to be my companion from this moment onward. Even if it''s just a thick stick.


    I tripped again, nearly falling face down on a large moss covered boulder. It was odd to see only the lonely giant stones around. Or maybe I actually didn''t look hard enough. It took me another ten minutes of walking around until I actually realized that the stones could be long covered with multiple layers of moss and debris. Truly - under the thick carpet of moss and rotten wood - were smaller stones. Flat and round, as if washed my water, which was strange considering I was in a forest, and besides the man eating pond no large bodies of water were in sight. Nevertheless I left my discovery for the time being, knowing that I have stones available was enough. Despite it being good news, I wasn''t air-headed enough to smile or be happy at all, I felt a bit heavy and empty on the inside.


    Some time later the backpack was filled up to the top with multiple layers of stacked paper-leaf stems, and I decided that it should be enough. Well I didn''t know how fast the stems would spoil after becoming edible, but spoiled food was still better than no food in my mind. I had more than three times that I could possibly eat in three days, so if the plants would start to spoil - I would overeat like crazy and go look for more. It was a better option than starving. I''ve put the paper leaves on top of the bundle, then wrapped it with the vines, securing the whole thing in place. On my way back to camp, I passed the spot where I dug out some stones. My bundle became quite a bit heavier as I added the different sized rocks to the "collectibles". My back felt the weight, and the shoulder straps dug into the skin. Yep, even in a different world - rocks are bloody heavy. At least I wasn''t going to make a second trip just to get some stones, all in one go.


    "Real men carry everything in one trip.." - well what goes for groceries shall go for everything else, right? How did I live without human interaction? Its been only a few days and I''m wierding myself out already..


    ...


    I saw my reflection as I drank from the stream. I looked like shit, that for one was obvious even without looking. I felt like shit, tired, dirty, bloodshot eyes and the whole lot more. My body won''t last long if I keep going in this manner, I had to come up with a better schedule than work until you drop..


    Once again - the leaves rustled as I made my way into the little encampment within the bushes. The opening became my little island of isolation, something I was grateful for. A light, almost transparent smoke signified that the flames were still burning. I sat and stared into the coals, until I remembered the crude cup that I made a while ago, yes - the one that looked like a dog made it. Well - it dried out enough, so I could try firing it inside of the fire pit.


    The dried clay cup found its way into the burning hot coals. To top it off - I added more wood on top, so that the burning flames provide enough heat. Now I''d have to wait and do something else to keep myself occupied.


    "If the cup is a success.. then making clay utensils and pottery might be rather useful.." - I started scribbling something on the ground, a simple shape of a doughnut, but a bit more cylindrical. To make pottery - a simple furnace would be useful, and with the current resources - it is easy to make one. I mean in theory - it''s not that different from making a sand castle on the beach.


    Rest was brief, and in a few moments I was already back to work. What I was doing this time? Throwing a rock at another rock.. yep, that''s it. I was trying to break one rock with another, which worked, but not all of the broken pieces were usable. I was able to produce some different sized flakes, which were razor sharp - I figured it after grabbing one and slitting a quarter of my fingernail off. Painful, but I wasn''t even mad - that was amazing. I had a sustainable source of cutting tools, which would mean easier time doing... things.. Yes, I was still dubious of what to do and where to start.. Jumping from one task to another.


    Speaking of another... another rock split diagonally, making a somewhat triangular shape.. This was exactly my intention.. well - that''s the result I was hoping to get, the process was rather clumsy, so I would not be able to produce another piece like that any time soon. What was the intention? A hand ax, something to chop wood with, not an actual tool - but a crude primitive ax meant that I could progress with the tasks I made for myself.


    I''ve put the sharp stone flakes into the pouch where I kept my cutting tools..khem..pieces of glass, and went to try out the new tool in action. Lets say - cutting wood was a slow and tedious process, and I soon got too tired after cutting down a small tree, well.. more of a large sapling. Seems like task that require wood will be more time consuming than I thought.. not like I was right about a single thing here from the first moment on. The cool air brushed my cheek, and I sat down before the fire - looking at my freshly cooked meal.


    Yes, I tried to bake the stems on hot coals, which proved to be a rather smart choice of action. The stems became a lot softer, and tasted - still just like onions, but now baked. Sweet and smoky, full of juice - it was a good enough food for someone as tired as myself. There was a huge bundle of stems in the shade, ripening as time went by. Or should I call that fermenting? Either way - I had some stems left, so I won''t starve before the new ones are ready to eat. I may be lacking nutrients, but not starving as of now.


    The cup I made came out to be just fine, I tapped the glass with a fingernail, which made a slight "ting" sound. As far as I knew- that meant the clay was fired successfully. No apparent cracks, and as it was the test sample - I didn''t wait until it cooled down gradually, I wanted some comfort - as such, I decided to boil some water.


    To make things different, I crushed the purple-maple leaves and mixed them in the cup. I''ve put it directly on the burning hot coals. After a few minutes the water started bubbling, there wasn''t that much of it, so it heated up to a boil really fast. With a few green sticks, I gently moved the cup from the heat onto the ground and left there to cool down. I wasn''t that impatient, and the idea of burning my hands and lips wasn''t all that appealing. For the time being I sighed and flexed my arms, though the only thing that relaxed was my body.. my mind wasn''t allowed to get even a second of rest. It seemed that relaxing was not such a great idea after all. I got really sleepy in just a few minutes of sitting. A thought occurred to me, it was barely a day after the incident, and I''ve simply thrown myself into full on work mode, trying to avoid thinking about what happened or sulking. Ignoring things - running away from the reality in one way or another, why does it seem like the easiest way to proceed?


    I held the cup to my lips, smelling the dark liquid inside. The "tea" had a somewhat earthy smell, but there was more to it, that taste which I was able to sense within the water - it was stronger now. Didn''t mean that it lingered long enough for me to understand what it was. Faint - the only word I could come up with to describe it.


    ...


    Something to note for the future. Coffee, nor any energy drink.. stands even close to the pur-map leaf tea. It felt like a jolt of electricity ran from my across the whole body, strong enough to fry my brain and any sleep that still lingered in it. Tiredness was still there, however it was numbed to the point that I could go on for a few more hours, maybe even more. I glanced upwards, the sky was dark, no moon, no stars - just a solid black colour that absorbed everything that dared to step into it. The forest seemed quiet right now, but I suspected that there was more action within this silence than I could make out.


    "Well, there goes my sleep rationing.." - I was left alone with my thoughts once again, inevitable if you think about it. With the day being longer than twenty four hours, I certainly had to shove a few hours of sleep during the day.


    "Work, eat, sleep" - great schedule if you ask me.


    I''ve spent the night thinking and doing minor chores around the camp. There was no more smelly dirt around the place where I was flailing around not that long ago. Never thought that I would be using a makeshift broom to clean the soil. Speaking about cleaning - as it was right now, I was covered in dirt after every nap I took, and being a civilized being - I would spend half an hour washing my body in the stream afterward.


    "Maybe it was time to make a bed... or something close enough..." - Of course making a bed would be a bit harder than simply assembling a pre-made one bought in a shop, but I was rather sure that it wouldn''t be all too difficult. I looked at the bundles of cordage made from bark fibers that I''ve made some time ago, it was time to make proper use of the abundance of material that I''ve had at my disposal for this whole time.


    "The pur-map is all too potent, I guess taking a nap during the day is inevitable." - I stretched, stress remained -but somehow it wasn''t all too bad, like I didn''t care that much. I just hope it''s not caused by something harmful.


    ....


    Sweat was dripping from my forehead onto my nose and falling to the ground, as droplets of water from a slightly opened sink tap. I looked at the job I''ve done so far. It looked somewhat bed-like, if you can consider four wooden stakes fixed in the hard ground with a frame tied to them, to be a bed. Two sets of frames were a few inches from one another. One to hold sticks, the other to hold the bedding material.. which in my case was paper-leaves and some dry grass.. the latter still had to be dried and smoked - just in case there were any bugs.


    "Building a bed first, not shelter.. seems a bit out of order.." - In reality that was the only option right now, as my wounded hand was in no condition to handle larger pieces of wood. As such - building a "house" would have to wait, the current heat was useful. I chewed some roasted stems while taking care of small things around the camp. Making sure that everything was in at least a semblance of order, so that I can find anything at any given time. Onion tasting plant was a good source of food, however I won''t be able to live off of it forever. Sooner or later I had to get something else to eat.The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.


    ....


    I looked at the seemingly calm water of the pond, the sun barely shined through the canopy, reflecting in the glass-like surface like dozens of fireflies. Standing on the hard ground I could still feel a slight tremble in my chest, I was afraid of the water. Every day I would spend a few minutes looking at it, thinking of nothing, trying to get used to the fear. Yes, I wasn''t trying to dull it, to get rid of it.. fear was important. It''s been three days already, three days after I''ve lost a part of me to the monster in the deep.


    "Mom used to say that if a wound itches, then it means it is healing.. if that''s true then I should have grown a new hand or two already.." - It wasn''t an exaggeration, even though there was no apparent infection, the healing remains of the fingers were itchy as all hell. The single numbing-berry I''d take every twelve or so hours wasn''t of any help with the sensation. It was driving me insane. It''s really hard to stay focused when such a distraction is present.


    I didn''t fish in the pond any more, as walking inside the stomach fluids of the pond was a self inflicted taboo. I didn''t even enter the pond to get the fish-trap out of it.. Simply used a pole made of a long stick and the fishing spear I''ve had. When I removed the basket out of the "water" it wasn''t that surprising that there was no fish caught in it. Not like I had any plans to eat it. I shuddered only remembering the insane craving for more tasty fish that came after consuming it''s flesh.


    "Still there.." - I gulped in disgust, seems like my thoughts were still affected.. at least I was aware of this fact.


    There was slight progress with gathering of materials. Even though I still hesitated to work using the injured hand, I would gather fiber and thin branches. The pile of wood was separated into piles branded - "fire wood" and "for later use". As I was limited in what I allowed myself to do, the piles were stacked pretty high - almost to my chest. Considering the amount of young wood I''ve collected, there was quite a bit of fiber, hence - quite a bit of cordage I was able to weave.


    In the shade the stacked wood produced stood the result of my artisan skill. Yesterday I''ve made use of more of the clay. Even though it was kind of slow with only one hand, I indulged in "pottery" - making a simple clay disk and layering thing sausages of clay to make a pot shape.. well, a "battered ugly bucket" was a better description.


    ...


    The days passed slowly, even though it seemed to me that I was able to do a lot in this time. For one, I''ve made a discovery that could mean a new food source. It happened during soon after the afternoon sleep, as I was gathering more wood. As I was picking up another twig - I''ve notice small black oval shaped stones on the ground, well- at first I thought that they were tiny stones, what was confusing - they were on top of the moss, not buried beneath it. Once I picked it up and was able to see it properly I smiled.


    "It''s shit.." - Man was I happy to have shit in my hands.. That''s a first time for sure.. Well - rodent shit meant meat, and I didn''t eat anything but plants for the past four days. I like the food I have, but meat, even from a rat was appetizing to say the least.


    Besides, after the long hours of looking at the murky waters, I had some ideas on how to use the addicting fish in the future. What I had swimming in the waters was the best bait in the whole world. One taste and you''re addicted.. of course that''s if you''re not me.


    Well.. no rat traps at hand, and the bait is swimming leisurely in the waters, so really.. quite a long way to go until I''m even able to get the meat.


    "To get rats, I have to get the fish.. and to get the fuckers means I have to finish "that"


    "That" was something I was trying to do, and failing quite miserably at the moment. I tried to make a stone spearhead- well, more like an arrow head. I figured that if I had to throw the spear into the water from a longer distance - I''d have to make something sharper.. The current spear didn''t have enough power, nor sharpness to pierce the larger fish from a distance. "That" had a twin brother - "this" which I delayed as it was just a hassle. Trying to carve something out of hard wood using just stone flakes was hard.


    A lot of steps to take before you are able to do a certain thing, and when you are ready - it appears that you have a handful of things to do right away, at the same time.


    ...


    The rat traps seemed to work when I tested them, however the ones I''ve set up in the proximity of the camp - were untouched. I guess the rodents didn''t like the roasted stems. Good thing that I was about ready with "this" and "that".


    What I''ve been carving during the eating hours was an atatl. Imagine a club meeting a spoon, meant to act as an extra lever for the purpose of throwing a spear. It was supposed to increase the throwing power by quite a large margin. And higher velocity, paired with a better spear would mean a direct upgrade. What was enough to use in hunting mammoths, should do against these nasty water dwellers.


    The tiny spearheads weren''t perfect and some were fragile, but I had a batch of them prepared in case I break it.


    Something else - quite an obvious addition to the whole fishing idea, something I''ve done already - a platform above water. Well.. I didn''t quite make one, but the bed had the same design - so simple repeat in steps and I had a way to stay away from water while at the same time being a lot closer to the unsuspecting victims. A thin rope tied to both the tail of the spear and the wooden stake of the platform would mean I didn''t have to go in the water to retrieve the catch. At first I thought of attaching the rope to my wrist or the belt area of the sack-shorts, but decided against it. Dangerous - that''s what such actions would be. Wasn''t going to give even a slightest chance to be pulled in by the plant..


    After this new addition, my days became quite busy, but ultimately it was a grind once more. Slowly progressing with everything at the same time, recovering and figuring the best course of action - simple description of my struggles.


    It''s been five days already, passed in a breeze.. that''s what you get when you are busy at any given moment, not enough time in the day, even when the day is longer than you''re used to.


    My schedule became something like: Spearfishing, making pottery, making cordage, collecting resources, weaving at least a basket nearly every day and tend to rat-traps. Most of the tasks already became dull to the point that I performed them without thinking too much about the actual task, and more about the surroundings, being alert at the same time.


    I''ve cut a few larger looking young trees, which were still on the thinner side to be honest. Nevertheless - with the crude tool, and only one working arm - I''ve spent a lot of time on that. And it still wasn''t enough, maybe two thirds of the resources I calculated I''d need, but I wasn''t done with other collectibles either. I started going around and cutting down ferns, which I stacked in bundles that were growing with each passing day. The project to build a hut was on its way to completion and that wasn''t the only thing that was going well.


    Fishing was getting better, besides it''s not like I needed a lot of fish. I''d never eat them anyways. But, I''ve scattered some of the fish quite far away from the camp, and began setting up more rat traps, using the new bait. Success didn''t wait too long to follow. The next day after I set the traps with the fish, I found out what the rodent looks like. Ugly.


    The noose of the trap has strangled the small animal to death. I''d be sad if you showed me something like that before, now - I was still sad, but hungry for something better tasting than the onion smelling sticks. I removed the noose from the animals neck while holding it by the long rabbit-like ears. It didn''t move at all, but just to make sure I broke it''s neck. A slight cracking sound notified me that the animal won''t wake up, and I held it by the ears before myself. Beady black eyes with no whites stared at me as if the animal was alive. It had a head similar to a rat, but some parts were of a rabbit - like the ears and the plump body ending with a silky smooth, bald tail.


    "Rat rabbit hybrid..." - well I didn''t mind the looks, but I hoped it wasn''t going to infect me with some parasites or the plague.


    Butchering it was amazingly easy. The hide ripped open really easy, so I didn''t even have to cut it for the most part, just rip it and pull off the carcass. It was thin, which unfortunately meant that it was useless to me. I could boil it to make glue or something, but what use would that be? On the other hand, the meat was pink and appetizing, if you forget the blood and gore, as well as the guts that had to be buried underground. Seems like I don''t mind blood all that much, not like I was ever getting cold feet after seeing some crimson red after a nasty cut. The rat-bit seemed appetizing even being covered in its own blood.


    You could think that I would cook it on the open fire or something, but as I didn''t have proper food for far too long to my liking, I cooked something proper for once. Besides, I could make use of one of the many pots I''d made previously.


    Boiling the meat together with paper-leaf stems for an hour and a half, made me nearly drown in my own saliva. The smell... I''ve made soup, simple and plain.. but god all-mighty kill me if it didn''t smell heavenly.. that was a mouthwatering feast like never before. Long story short, the rat-bit tasted like rabbit, and that was by far the best dinner I''ve had during my whole stay in this place.


    That was the biggest success by far, but not the only one. I''ve also made a pestle from wood and using some water and pur-map leaves, I''ve made a paste. Finally no need to chew the leaves every time I had to reapply the bug repellent. Well.. to be honest the concentrated oily paste, which was bitter as all hell, could still be brewed.. or.. chewed when in need of an energy boost. Multipurpose paste - seemed really helpful at the time.


    Not all experiments were a success though. I''ve found out that paper-leaf is completely not suitable to be used as a material for boots. It was too thin. Suitable for the role of bandages and toilet paper, but trying to wear the leaves as shoes.. oh my would it be a mistake. The second step I made, left a sharp stick in my sole, good thing I felt it in time, so it didn''t pierce deep. I stopped experimenting with the leaves for a while afterward.


    Next failure was me trying to be all cocky and make a spoon out of clay. Well - lets say it was for the sake of science that I''ve wasted nearly three hours trying to mold it. I decided that I''ll stick to using chopsticks, and maybe.. maybe.. carve a spoon out of wood sometime I have more free time. Which I didn''t.


    ....


    Something else worth mentioning, the state my hand was in during these few days. Itching seemed to fade slowly, but just to be sure that the wound doesn''t get infected I''d change the bandages daily. There was no swelling, nor any pus coming out of the wound. A few droplets of dry blood, and the wax-like substance. The web-like layer that kept the wound closed - started fading, as if becoming transparent. On the fifth day it dissolved when I was washing the wound in the stream, leaving only the white scar tissue. It looked as if my skin was molten and stuck together. Well.. that could actually be the case for all I knew. I tried moving the "good" fingers, and there was only a slight discomfort, so it seemed that finally I would be able to use both of my hands.


    "More work possible now..." - I wasn''t all that happy, work was necessary to survive, but it didn''t mean that I enjoyed doing everything. Building a hut was on the list since forever, besides, all the resources were already gathered and waiting to be put together.


    ...


    Building a thatch hut is not difficult, it just takes some time and patience, as well as both hands. Using a piece of cord and a few sticks, I drew a circle on the ground - just so that everything aligns correctly. It was a bit strange to think of how to better build this thing, with the bed already in place, but I tried my best.


    I started by drawing an approximate circle enclosing the area which I planned to build around. The diameter of the circle was a few heads longer than my own height, that way I could at least lay down. Everything else was rather easy, digging the soil to place the poles for the frame, bending them together and tying tightly, even the whole process of surrounding the frame with its ribs and placing thatch on top. It went on so fast that I didn''t even notice how a few hours later I was tying the last knot on the inside of the hut. That''s including the cap covering that one opening at the peak of the frame.


    "That was kind of fast." - In reality, most of the work was already done beforehand, as I collected all material and made preparations. What has left me busy only with assembly, and as I found out that didn''t take long.


    "Can''t believe my eyes.." - I truly couldn''t believe. For the last week of Earth time, I was struggling without being able to use my left hand.. it was shocking to see the actual difference that it made. I sat down on the primitive bed inside the new dark room, it felt cozy. Separated from the environment, covered from the sun. I lied down on the bed, and without much wait, I slipped away into a dream.


    ...


    After the great success with the hut, I expected the following projects and such to become quite easy and less meaningful. The fact that I had to place five more rat traps proved that luck has its limits and ultimately - me being wrong. More traps meant a better average supply of rat-bits, which seemed to vary from one day to another. Sometimes I got nothing, sometimes nearly all of the traps were presenting me with a delicious fluff-ball.


    And as I had more traps, I still had to spend some time during the day spearfishing. But soon I came to realize - I really needed one or two of the fish from the pond, but as my aim got better, as I got used to throwing a spear with an atatl, it didn''t take all that much of my time. Even though I could keep fishing and simply let the fish spoil, I would never waste the precious resource like that, but I wanted to keep practicing with the atatl, mostly because it was the only thing I could consider "fun" right now. You have to have something to vent the stress.. well that was my current way.


    So I decided to spend some time after fishing, as well as after the midday sleep - training. Well.. more like throwing spears into a target from a lot further away. It proved a lot more difficult, but at the same time a lot more challenging and fun.


    That''s how I added a bit of exercise into my schedule.


    On the next day after the first training session, I wanted to reconsider - yay muscle pain, but pushed myself through the whining and added some stretching into the schedule twice a day. Which was fine, because considering the amount of food I had to eat just for it not to spoil, I had plenty of energy to do all this. For once, I was overeating and trying to work through those calories diligently.


    Speaking of the abundance of food.. I started to throw whole bundles of rat-bit skins and guts into the pond. So in a way I was feeding the trap-plant dwelling there, as well as all that fish. Quite a cycle going on there.


    ...


    After wasting some more time cutting wood using the stone hand ax, and inevitably getting tired of using such an inefficient tool, I decided it was time to put my head into it and remember how to make a proper stone ax. Blisters from using a simple sharp rock were killing me. My palms felt like they were covered in bark, but it was just layers over layers of blisters from both spearfishing and doing quite a lot of stuff with my bare hands.


    Well, to make a stone ax - I required a stone ax-head.. which required a stone, which as I found out were all underneath the moss. After a bit of digging and picky choosing, I victoriously carried the pear shaped flat stone to the large boulder closest to my "base". I sat in front of a boulder, with a pot filled half with sand, half with clear water from the spring, and started grinding a small rock on the larger rock.. So much fun... But it wasn''t hard to do, just tedious. That''s what I understood about most of these tasks - they were more tedious than hard, a bit taxing on the body, but still manageable.


    The weather however made this tedious grinding quite a bit harder, as it was really hot, and it wasn''t even afternoon at the time. I could feel my whole body being covered in sweat, and my head becoming heavy. In that hour that I was grinding the axehead, I went on to the stream to cool down and drink a few times. I am certain that I wasn''t just being lazy. My sunburns got better, the reddish skin stopped hurting and started getting darker, from bright red, to more of a purple color, and finally giving up and starting to look tanned. Who knew that a cure for my intolerance of sunbathing would be sunbathing..


    The product was worth the effort - a rather smooth looking axehead with a clear edge to it. It wasn''t super sharp, but it was enough to cut wood.. well.. I still had to make a handle for it. That was the part that I really had to sort out.. and at least remember something linked to it. Easiest way to proceed was - making a Celt ax, and that the Celt with the same C as citrus. In all truth - the handle was easy to make if you had good enough wood lying around, which I had plenty of. Hoarding habits seem to keep paying off.


    So what you want to have is a piece of wood that looks sort of like a club, which I had trouble getting out from underneath the whole pile of different shaped pieces of wood and sticks. I then went on and scraped it smooth and sat in front of the fire. Here was the part that was somewhat interesting - using burning coals to burn through the wood. With the limited sharpness tools I had at my disposal, fire was the fastest way to dig through the handle. It took about twenty minutes to an hour of measuring, blowing on a piece of burning coal and scraping - but the result - a hole wide enough to fit the axehead, but at the same time not long enough to let is slip through. It should hold right around the middle portion, with each hit getting stuck more firmly within the wood. No chance that the axehead would fall out of the handle, unless it shattered to pieces.


    Happy with the result, I actually set the ax aside inside my hut, and proceeded according to schedule.. which meant dinner.

 Chapter 12: I wish the night was silent

    It''s been nearly two weeks of local time that I''ve started counting days. Twenty or so days Earth time - I was impressed that someone like me was able to survive in the wilderness for such a long time, and not just survive but thrive. For one - I''ve really gained in weight. Which was understandable considering my diet of rat-bit meat, which - as I found out was impossible to dry without spoiling. That''s one unpleasant memory.. my stomach still turns on the thought of eating cardboard-like meat that had a horrible rancid aftertaste and made me throw up for a few hours. But other than that - the meat was fine, I just had to eat it before it spoiled... considering the amount of rat-bits that were littering this place, I could go on forever and that''s including overeating like crazy every few days. I would eat so much, I''d get dizzy from all the stuffing inside of me.


    With this much calories and the plentiful physical labor, I gained some meat to my bones. It didn''t look like a bodybuilders body, my arms were just thicker, and whole body looked a bit more solid if I would describe it. The palms of my hands were hard as shovels- I really could juggle burning coals without feeling a thing if I wanted to.


    One important change in the schedule was the addition of a laundry day.. Even though I washed myself regularly, having only one set of ...clothes, was.. well.. inconvenient to say the least. The sack-pants smelled, and the smell wasn''t that nice.. so a few days ago I had the idea to wash them, and used the ashes from the campfire as a makeshift washing powder. Ashes- that''s how lye was made back in the day.. hell- it still is, I think. Ashes plus hot water and you have yourself a way to clean your clothes.


    As my hands scrubbed the fabric on itself, I thought about making clothes of my own. Which was possible, but crazy difficult. For one - I vaguely knew how to do that, so it would take up all of my free time. This lack of knowledge meant that this idea had to be thrown out, as many others before it. I looked at the shorts which looked completely gray, even more - they were covered in a thick layer of wet ashes. At that moment I started to doubt this method of washing. However as I started- I had to finish, besides it wasn''t like I wouldn''t be able to wear them afterward. Rinsing the fabric from the oily ash-water took quite a bit of effort.


    After ten minutes of splashing around in the stream, I was able to finally wash the last bits of ash off. The fabric looked a bit darker, but I hoped it would at least feel cleaner and not smell as much of sweat. I didn''t like the idea of smelling like a homeless person..


    After I hung the wet shorts on a bush, I stopped for a while, thinking about what to do while they dry. The idea of walking whole lot around the forest with my junk flailing around didn''t sit well with me. Seems some part of me was still civilised.


    I decided on practicing with spear throwing, so I had to pick up the training spears from the hut. The atatl was always with me, even without the spears - the piece of wood was a decent little club, and a triangular shape of the backside of it could certainly provide a nasty wound if I would need to use it. A thought struck me, with all this work, I failed to notice how everything in my surroundings seemed to fade away. I didn''t take notice of smells, sounds or even feeling on my skin. I was preoccupied with doing a task then moving to a different one.


    "Really wrong if I think about it.." - My own voice in my head sounded annoyed. Even if I acted in a quite efficient manner - all of these seemingly meaningless pieces of information were important. It was still the remains of the way I used to live... looking only a short distance ahead, dulling my senses.. It was wrong on many levels, which meant only one thing..


    "I have to forcefully change this habit..." - I ducked and entered the narrow hole which was the entrance into my thatch hut. The dry grassy edges scraped on my skin, as if someone with thin long nails was scratching my back, it wasn''t that unpleasant - just a bit discomforting.


    Now that I was forcefully aware of my surroundings, the hut was a bit dim and smelled of smoke and moss. The later was thanks to the few pur-map leaves I would add to the small bundle of timber for the fire pit. At any time there was a small fire burning inside. I even built a ring around it out of clay, along with a tiny shelf like roof , a small furnace so to speak. It was only because of it that there was no sparks flying all around the hut. If that was the case, it would burn down in an instant I think, so I really put my best effort into making a secure fireplace inside. The smoke didn''t cover the whole hut, only the higher part - and inevitably would get blown away through the vent.. well- the top opening with a cap- served as a vent, so I didn''t choke myself with smoke.


    I reached for the spears under the bed, which had a whole lot of bundles of cordage on it - I was busy with figuring out how to make knots.. one thing is seeing a video on it, completely different- trying to tie a knot yourself. At the moment- I was really far away from being perfect - I could make a hanging noose... well, that''s it, no monkey-fist knot or anything cool..


    I took the training spears and grabbed the small clay cup with the purple paste in it, I pushed my fingers into it and reached for my eyes. I smeared the oily purple paste around my eyelids, making me look just fabulous with purple eye-shadows. In all truth that was the best protection from the sun I had, it proved to work quite well. As my eyes were light in color and susceptible to bright light, I really struggled to aim during the afternoon sun, or even the morning, when the sun was low and shining straight into my eyes. Dark circles around my eyes seemed to absorb some light and lessen the strain on my vision. Not quite sunglasses - but the closest I could get.


    Before exiting the hut, I took a pot that stood close to the fire and made a few large gulps. Yep, the leftover soup from yesterday. Well- I ate most of the meat already in the morning, so all that was left was a bit fatty brine. It wasn''t great tasting cold, but it wasn''t bitter or spoiled - so I was happy enough.


    "I''ll have to check on the traps after I get my clothes back.." - I placed the pot on the ground, near other pots that required cleaning as well, I''d kill for a dishwasher right now, or at least some dish-soap.. washing the fat from the pottery with sand was a long and tedious process.. and I had to boil some water just to make sure I was safe to use them later. Washing dishes with sand, boiling hot water and bare hands - I''d be whining, but my hands lost the ability to feel nearly any pain already, so it was fine. Just annoying, as everything else.


    I left the dim hut, not looking at other smaller projects I had sketched on whitish paper-leaves using coal. The sudden change in lighting made me half-close my eyes. I lowered my hand looking around, the forest wasn''t all that green. Only the plants near the stream seemed to have the lush green color to them, everything else was rather yellowish. There was nearly no wind, and it was still quite hot.


    "Back home, I''d expect it to be raining after such a heatwave.. here however.. it''s nearly a month.. and still no rain.. the stream is getting smaller, I doubt it would dry out completely.. but if worse comes to worst .. I''ll have to drink from the pond.. God no! " - I made my way to the small "shooting range" I''ve made. It wasn''t anything special, but to me it was like a playground. I had a few bundles of grass and paper-leaves tied to poles on different distances, however knowing that static targets are just that- static, I''ve made a bundle tied to a branch, which was swinging from side to side. I was still trying to figure a way to make it swing more randomly, the current movement was rather predictable.This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    I laid the spears on the ground, then sat down on the moss. The feeling of pine needles and dry moss touching my bum, was... new.. I shivered from the slight discomfort, but proceeded to stretch. As my fingers reached for my toes, I felt the tendons straighten up and stretch. This helped with the later muscle pains, plus warmed up muscles performed better, and helped avoiding a dislocation. I doubt that I could pop a dislocated shoulder back in myself, and I didn''t want to try it. The stretching was short, but it''s not like I was going for Olympic gold or anything, I was just practicing to not go crazy from the loneliness and isolation.


    One extra step that seemed pointless and a waste of strength at first - was me tying a bundle of sticks around my forearm, and not just sticks, they had stones wrapped in paper-leaf wedged into them.. Overboard? Maybe.. but there was something cool to training with weights, even a rather dumb and boring character gets ultimately cool when he removes the super heavy weights and gets all serious.. Call it my inner weeb screaming, but I wanted this, even if it meant making my muscles scream in agony. And they screamed like a thousand hell-hounds for the first few days.


    I pushed the bundle, letting it swing to the maximal amplitude and proceeded to the spot where I left the spears. The atatl was hanging on a rope attached to my wrist, just like a Wii remote, but far more deadly. I took one of the spears and aligned it into the opening of the atatl, then took a deep breath and made a wide step while stretching my arm to its full length. Rotating the whole body around one axis, forcing the momentum through my core with the synchronized movement of the hips, legs, chest, back and arm muscles. The result - a swing that actually made a wheezing sound. The spear soared through the air, rotating as it neared its target. With a thud sound- it pierced the closest bundle, shoving itself through it to half its length..


    "Off center.. and a bit too slow." - I judged my performance and reached for the next spear. The same process repeated itself numerous times. I''d throw a spear, criticize the throw, go through all of the projectiles, collect them and start over. It went on for an hour - until I was kind of out of breath, covered in sweat and my arms felt numb. That was still better than previously - as I was barely able to go for fifteen minutes at first... that''s what she said..


    After training I went to the stream to wash off the sweat and drink up, as well as pick up the still slightly wet shorts. Which were dry enough, so I''ve put them on and went to the traps, I hoped for some fresh meat today, however I was surprised when I arrived at the first trap... and I really don''t like surprises.


    "Well fuck.. I really hoped that I''d luck out on that..." - My hands trembled slightly at the sight. I captured a rat-bit - but someone stole most of it.. Leaving only the tied head in the trap.. the body was bitten off by something. Seems like my traps might be considered as free cafeteria by some animals.. the thing is - I didn''t see any animals close to my camp.. well - if you forget the toad-like creatures.. I really hoped it wasn''t them. I clenched my atatl harder, to the point my knuckles became pale-white.


    "Seems like I''ll have to make some bigger traps.."- yep, that''s the plan. Home-alone tactics, with a bit of a deadlier touch. Trap the fuck out of the surrounding area, and make sure to remember all the locations not to fall into them. A whole lot of making sharp sticks incoming. From the dozen traps I''ve got only three rat-bits, another two were in the same condition as the first one - surely something was hungry enough to get close to my camp, only a matter of time until I am on the menu.. and we can''t have that, can we?


    Almost all of the projects were put on hold as I returned to camp. I gutted and skinned the rat-bits as usual, and left them over the hot coals to cook. In the mean time, I got straight to the point and brought a lot of sticks into the hut. For the traps I was going to make I required a whole bunch of spikes.. and by a whole bunch I mean a ton, hundreds maybe. Pitfall traps of different scale, stakes tied to a young tree that would act as a spring and strike with deadly force.. in reality these were the only traps I could come up with, others were just too Rambo-style and complicated to my knowledge. Nevertheless, I sat on the bed, shoved some pur-map paste under the upper and lower lips, feeling the slight stinging sensation, and went to work. Somewhat burn the sticks and then scrape them into sharp stakes. Lets say it went on for quite a while, and I had a whole backpack of them ready to go. Remember the simple wooden frame of a backpack - well it was completely full of stakes, to the point that I was barely able to carry them.


    I grabbed my digging-stick, an ax and a spear- looking like your average MMO character filled with items. Slowly I went on to the rat-traps, and close to them, I''ve set up a whole bunch of pitfall traps. It took a while, but after nearly ten hours of work, I was left with a perimeter resembling a minefield. Now I really hoped that I''d not forget where I''ve set one of these babies and accidentally step into one of them. That would spell disaster.. I decided to walk around tomorrow, making sure I get used to avoiding the deadly surprises I''ve left lying around. But now, I could go and eat dinner, sleep and get ready for the next day. I really hoped that the traps would provide at least a decent defense.


    ...


    Ok, so it took two days for the first victim of my serious mode traps to arrive. I guess there wasn''t all that much food, and the starving animal made it''s way to the place where the rat-bits were just hanging, waiting to be eaten. In the middle of the night, I woke up to a echoing yelp. It wasn''t the shriek itself that sent shivers down my spine, but the sound of similar yelps picking up in the distance. That thing that I thought was just a wandering single animal... was a whole pack.. Until the morning I sat in the hut, which was barely illuminated by the slight fire, clutching a spear to my chest. I went through half a pot of pur-map paste, so in the morning I was a bit jumpy - like I drank just a few dozens of cups of coffee too much..


    I was approaching the spot where I heard the yelp from, holding a spear in my atatl, ready to throw and kill. Well- it was a bit late for that as it seems.


    "Well.. that''s new.." - I looked at the gray fur of an animal. It was the size of a dog, not a large breed at that. I''d compare it to a fox, but..it had scales on its bald head, as well as the feet, which looked like ones of a lizard. Seems like this ugly mofo went for the easy prey, and fell chest first into the pit of spikes, which pierced through its chest.. It must have been moving quite fast, as the stakes went right through its throat and chest in a few places and were sticking from the other side, covered in blood. It''s only eye, which was located in the center of the head looked shocked and scared. I could imagine.. it didn''t meet it''s death fast.. It bled to death, suffocating on its own blood as the spikes pierced the throat and lungs.


    "Others might have been curious" - the area close to the pit seemed like someone was walking in circles for quite some time.


    "Probably the pack-mates" - I squat in front of the pit, trying not to miss anything, the least I could do - was notice the obvious. - "They didn''t get close to the dying creature, they were cautious of it.. even after it died they didn''t dare to fetch the body, or eat it.."


    I stood up. To be sure, I had to check other traps. It seemed that they didn''t get caught in any other traps along the way..


    "Considering the amount of noise.. I''d guess there was quite a number of them.. but somehow they avoided all the traps up to that point.. as if following the tracks of their fallen mate.."


    I went on to collect a few rat-bits which got caught in the rattraps, seems like the drama that happened during the night scared away any other critters.


    "Now they will either be careful and not step close to these traps, or avoid them, but still steal my meat..." - seems like the lack of food is making a whole lot of animals move around, I''ll inevitably have another encounter with something larger than a fish..


    "It''s probably the dry season at fault here.. less food means more fights for territory.." - I picked up the carcass of the strange new animal by its hind legs and dragged it towards my camp. It really had a long face with short and sharp teeth. A bite from that would leave a nasty mark.. and that''s if I forget the lizard claws, which could definitely pierce the skin. I was going to proceed the same way as with the rat-bits. Gut, skin, cook and eat. I guess I should have noticed something earlier, I regret not being observant enough, as there were tracks near the trap, but nearly none leading from it...

 Chapter 13: Hate to be right, Hate to be wrong

    The newly found animal seemed edible, at least it smelled quite nice roasted. The meat was firm, with little to no fat. Latter was probably caused by the current lack of food. Somehow my luck with being able to live off of a few herbs and rat-bits seemed quite fortunate. I''d guess the rat-bits were many times faster and more nimble than the lizard creatures. I still didn''t figure what I should call them, so at the moment I called it lunch. There was enough meat for a few days to be honest, however I still didn''t go on preserving food, so eating the lizard the same day it was cooked - seemed like a plan.


    Without salt, the meat tasted bland and dry - like overcooked chicken, not quite what I expected, not even close to the rat-bit meat. Still - I had to finish it today, otherwise it will end up as fish-food, just like its guts and skin. I left the hut feeling full, burping occasionally - after all I''ve eaten half the thing, along with a bit of boiled stems as a garnish.


    "I have to reset the trap today.." - I grabbed a spear and headed over to the place where the trap was. The weather was still the same, hot and wind-less. The forest was quiet, I couldn''t even hear birds chirping somewhere at the top layers of the lush forest.


    " I wonder if I''ll have to change the alignment of the traps or something, just that the animals won''t figure a way around them." - The leaves sounded like waves at the beach, occasionally filling the air with slight rustling sounds, that were picked up and echoed ever so slightly. In no time I was already by the spot, the blood dried up in the heat, and there was no smell I could perceive from it.


    "At least none of the spikes broke down, so no need to replace them" - I checked the wooden stakes, they were still sharp and usable, I just had to pick some thin sticks from the surrounding area and make a grid for pine needles and moss to go on. The sound of the trees creaking would remind me of the times when I''d go camping with my family or friends. The huge trees would look like reverse pendulums, waving in the wind and quietly creaking due to being bent even slightly.


    "Quite the times.." - I reached towards another thin stick, when a wave of cold sweat ran down my spine. There was still no wind.


    "..no.." - My palm held tightly to the spear as I started calmly turning my head. The slight creaking coming from the top of the tree didn''t stop, but I avoided looking directly at it, never was I so terrified of such a silent sound.


    Crra..crr.crrcrrcrr...crrra.. I sounded eerie. In the corner of my eye I could see movement up on the tree to my left, slow - almost unnoticeable.. like a chameleon. It was the same animal that got caught in the trap, it was slowly creeping up on me from the top of the tree.


    I moved slowly, pulling on the cord that attached the atatl to my wrist. The end of the spear was secured in place. I slowly made a wide step while stretching my arm a bit, my fingers gripped the handle so hard it could break, my heart was racing. The feeling of being hunted - it was terrifying.. I didn''t plan to allow the feeling to consume me. I wasn''t just some easy prey. I took a deep breath and my body shot out like a wind up spring, throwing the spear directly at the descending creature, just as it was about to get down to the ground. There wasn''t a loud sound from the impact itself, just like something was struck with a nail. I hit it on the back, and heard the thud noise of wood hitting wood.


    "Got''em!" - I cheered for just one second, as the familiar yelp echoed through the forest. It was only then that I noticed and acknowledged the silent creaking coming from all around the place. Slight chirping echoed from the top of the trees, and I immediately ran for the spear. The sounds I was hearing at night, and during the day.. wasn¡¯t the birds.. It was them, these lizard like animals dwelling on top of the trees, and now they were hungry and out for me.. smarter than I was, as they set up an ambush at the known hunting location... and I fell for it.


    I could see them descending, there was around three that I could see, and a few more by the sound of it, but it felt as if dozens of animals were rushing down from the trees like an avalanche ready to swallow me. I jerked the spear out of the still twitching body of the animal that I killed and turned around ready to face off with the attackers. Or so I thought.


    I misjudged the distance they were at, thinking that I had time.. I was barely able to tell that the darkness with slight blinking of lights- was the wide-opened mouth of the creature, aiming for the back of my neck. It jumped really high - as I was a rather tall person. It broke through the striking range of the spear, as well as the atatl, which was too long to fend it off from this proximity. It took a fraction of a second, but I raised my arms in order to cover my neck. It''s mouth snapped just like a mousetrap, and I was the mouse.


    It bit my forearm with amazing force, slicing and ripping through my skin, the hit knocked me off balance, as I was mid-turn. I could hear growling coming from it, as it''s sharp nails sliced through my skin as a paper-knife through cardboard. Its hind legs reached my chest and stomach, clawing at them, leaving long red lines along my body. I felt the air being knocked out of me as my back hit the ground. My left hand tried to rip it off with no success, pain struck like lightning -suddenly crushing my mind, I knew that in a few moments even more of those things would swarm me, and then... I''ll be no more.


    I pushed my thumb into its only eye with all force I could gather, until it popped like a zit, covering my face with lukewarm blood. The feeling of its insides was gut-wrenching and unpleasant to say the least, the smell of blood was strong as it sprayed all over. It got into my opened mouth, making me taste the metal in the sticky liquid. The animal yelped loudly, I wasn''t that far behind it, my own yell thundering in the air... I was finally able to shake it off, rolling away on the ground. Blood streamed down my arm, I could feel pulsing pain going through my whole body, but grabbed the atatl and lowered the center of gravity, pushing myself closer to the ground, being ready for the next animal flying at me.This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.


    The open jaws didn''t catch me off guard this time, and I didn''t hesitate to strike the flying projectile. With all my might I swung the club diagonally down. I wasn''t even aiming, simply reacting on sheer emotion and instinct. I was angry, afraid, terrified even, but I fucking wanted to live - best word to describe me at that very moment would be: "desperate". The triangular part of the atatl hit the thing right on the skull. The crack echoed through the forest, with not much yelping it fell to the ground. I was ready to strike another one, but none of them jumped, there was four or five left. The one I just downed was wheezing slightly as it''s body convulsed, it was still breathing apparently - but not for long.


    They weren''t going closer, but they kept moving. Circling around me. I could hear their claws going through the moss, rustling with every step. I kept twitching and moving, failing to keep all of them at sight. Two of them attacked at the same time, one from the front, one jumping at me from the back. It was only because I was turning, that I was able to drop the one that clawed onto my back off me. It ripped my skin, but I struck the one in front, missing it''s head and hitting the neck, which had thick muscles on it, protecting from most of the damage. It was hurt, not dead. Yelps could be heard all around me. The animal was getting back up, twisting its body, and I struck it on the skull as it was about to stand up and run away. It dropped to the ground, but I could tell that my atatl was about to break when I hit the lizard-fox.. between my fingers the wood already split, piercing the hard skin of my palm. With all the pain coursing through my body, I couldn''t tell if the splinter went into the muscle.


    The last strike didn''t kill it, so I yelled as loud as I could and stomped on the head of the downed enemy with all my weight, feeling the already fractured bone giving under the force of my foot and bending inwards. Bone scraped the heel of my foot as brain matter seeped through. There was no giant splatters of blood, everything remained close to earth.


    Yelping around me didn''t stop, it filled the air mixed along with growling. I really was just fighting to take out as many as I could before going down myself. The animals, however.. seemed hesitant. To them this hunt was already a failure, and they simply got quiet..and scattered to the trees. Climbing upwards rapidly, just like roaches when you turn on the lights. The forest was mostly quiet, the fight was over in an instant, only three bodies littered the ground, one was whining and yelping quietly, unable to see.


    "It''s quiet once again.. but now... I know that they are watching me.. constantly.." - I could feel the eyes on me, staring, waiting for me to drop my guard, to leave... In reality, I didn''t know what they waited for. I didn''t wait for anything.. I didn''t pick up the spear, I didn''t finish of the blinded creature, I headed through my trapped field into the only area void of trees - to my camp. I could feel my fingers and my arms sticking to my own skin because of the blood. I could feel the skin flapping in the place where the first bite hit me, with all the blood it was hard to tell where the skin ended and where the flesh was looking through.. it was all a mess.


    I nearly knocked the hut down when I entered it, slamming into the frame when going through the low doorway. I didn''t go for the bandages, or the water to clean anything, I went straight for the numb-berries, that I stashed in a pot close to the bed. I didn''t take as much as THAT time, but four berries got swallowed after a brief second of chewing. I could tell they did what was expected as the pain subsided within a few minutes. I took a pot of water and downed it over my body, trying to at least somewhat wash the wounds. The ground and the bed got covered in blood mixed with water, to keep myself from falling asleep right there, I took in a mouth-full of pur-map paste, forcing myself to keep at it. Slowly I started bandaging my own wounds, wrapping myself in paper-leaves. The hardest was to wrap the chest and my back, but the leaves simply stuck once in contact with blood for around half a minute, so eventually I started to look like a mummy covered in crimson leaves. I could tell that they were curling up and piercing through my skin and flesh, going deeper into my body. I didn''t mind - if a plant saved my life by growing into my body - let it be. Last time - there was no apparent long term damage. I licked my lips, and something felt wrong. Since the pain wasn''t as sharp I didn''t notice that fast, but the left side of both upper and lower lips was cut clean apart.. Probably by the first clawing lizard. I slapped a paper-leaf onto my face like a band-aid letting it stitch the wound for me. I tasted blood.. figures.


    I was able to stand up using a spear I picked from under the bed as a crutch. Slowly I made my way outside, where I didn''t hear any rustling - so it was at least seemingly safe. I felt a cool breeze, which would be really dramatic and all if I didn''t feel like complete shit right now. Now the real leaves rustled, and at the same time I could hear short howls run through the tops of the trees like a wave, or an orchestra. It was something I''ve never heard of, it didn''t have the same eerie feeling as the yelps of the lizards..but I could tell it was them, it was their song.. cheerful..


    "Why? Why the fuck are you happy? Do you think you got me?" - My face, crooked from anger was looking up into the trees, when a drop of rain fell on my cheek.


    "...rain.. they are cheering... because of rain..." - Confusion - that was the only thing my face reflected, nothing else.


    "..so you couldn''t care less about me.. " - I giggled like a maniac, hurting my own stitched body. More and more raindrops fell down, until it was like someone opened a shower full power, and I stood there like a retard, listening to the cheers of tree-dwellers and understanding that I wasn''t of interest to them any more.


    The excess blood was washed away by the rain by the time I went back into the hut. Water was dripping from me onto the bed, but I simply sat there, appreciating the fact that I was alive. Once again, a close encounter. I have to be ready at any given moment to fight, having a weapon on me was not enough.

 Chapter 14: During and After..

    The Rain.. there was so much of it, so suddenly. The sky turned black and there was only rain and darkness around. My hut seemed to handle such an amount of water quite well, inside it was rather dry. However I had to quickly make a temporary door to cover the opening, as water was getting in, and it got quite cold really fast. Some sticks and paper-leaves, along with a bit of cordage, and I had been able to completely isolate myself from the sudden water pour. The bleeding has completely stopped and numb-berries made me completely..well..numb to pain, so slight moving around didn''t hurt me. Pain wasn''t the issue, but the metallic taste in my mouth, along with sudden fever - was a problem. I lost quite a bit of blood and even though I washed the wounds to some degree, the wounds inflicted by an animal, be it bite or clawing, could get infected in a blink of an eye. The fever was worrisome, I hope it wasn''t a sign of an infection... Images of animals bitten by larger lizards came to mind, especially komodo monitors.. even if the victim escaped, infection would kill it eventually.. even though I came out of the short fight untouched, didn''t mean I was out of the danger zone.. I carefully dropped my body on the still damp bed, I wasn''t able to lay down properly. I was starting to tremble, it was chilly, but the fever was definitely setting in.. fucking animals..


    I grunted and pushed myself up after just a few minutes of lying in bed. Holding to my side, I stumbled to the pot that still had some water in it. I could barely pull it up to my mouth.. lukewarm water spilled on my chest and legs, but I greedily continued to drink...


    "Fuuuck.." - I growled, brushing my mouth with the backside of my arm. I doubted that I had enough strength to get to the stream, but my eyes were locked on the entrance to the hut.. I had enough in me to put the pots out right next to the door - to collect the rainwater, just so I didn''t have to walk around during the rain to get a sip of water - and I hoped that I could man up and crawl through my own hut to get them later. The rain was soothing, my eyes got quite watery, while all of the muscles decided to give out at the same time.. My feet were still on the ground, as I was half-lying on the paper-leaf mattress... I hated this..and I nodded off even despite the amount of pur-map I''ve ingested. Seems like fatigue hits harder than the coffee substitute eh?


    ...


    I woke up and the rain was still there, so I thought that not a lot of time passed, however the coals of my small fireplace were barely noticeable in the dark.. which proved me wrong.


    "Once again.. losing a shit-ton of time.. FUCK.." - I nearly screamed as I pushed myself up, the feeling of my skin being stretched while being pierced my the springlike roots or whatever was quite sharp. The fever seemed to calm down, but I was sweating, which meant I wasn''t all fine and dandy.


    "I can think.. and move.. sorta" - A bundle of different sized sticks went into the fireplace, it had enough strength in it to set the wood ablaze shortly.. I shuffled towards the entrance to get a drink, it still showered without any sign of stopping. Being bored of doing nothing, I began to make some cordage out of fibers I had laying around - I still believed that the rain would stop after a few hours.


    ...


    The rain was still there, and I''m literally out of fibers to make into cord... I''ve even practiced making knots for a few hours, not only that, but I''ve finished eating the remains of the tree dwelling lizard thing.. The bones were simply lying around near the fire pit, I was still to weak to walk out.


    "... that''s how you get ants" - I mumbled to myself, the edges of my lips rising ever so slightly.


    ...


    After some time of staying in a horizontal position, staring at the thatch dome, I couldn''t take it anymore. Staying in bed was unusual already, doing nothing and resting seemed crazy.. I had to do something..


    ...


    Seems like I''m cooking two types of paper-leaf stems.. boiled and roasted. The fact that I was able to fall asleep, then get hungry, means that it was raining for a whole day already, and it didn''t seem to stop. At first I went on to cook, but midway I thought that it was really possible that the rain will go on... for a long time. Which could prove to be quite problematic. Eying the pile of wood, I hoped it would stop sooner than later..


    ...


    Had to take off my shorts and go outside naked... nature calls. Lost most of the paper-leaf bandages due to them soaking up the water.. though the nets of the plant remained, holding my wounds closed like some sort of an exoskeleton. It''s still dark, and I''m losing track of time to be honest, it is possible that it''ll rain for a few years now.. so I have to somehow hunt in the dark? Fatigue was barely noticeable, no sign of fever.. the pain was coming and going as I took the numb-berries..


    "I''m healing quite fast.."Enjoying the story? Show your support by reading it on the official site.


    ...


    I''m not going out in the darkness to check on traps... no way. I''m chewing on the leftover bones of the tree-dweller, disgusting I know, and unnecessary to be honest. After the food started getting depleted, I tried to get to the paper-leaf bush.. Ever tried walking around your house in pitch darkness.. getting a bit anxious with each step? .. the same feeling, but I had reasons justifying the anxiety. I brought a whole weeks worth of stems with me, but would it be enough?


    ...


    It''s raining for what seems like eternity. Quite hard to keep track of time when you don''t see the sky, or even a sign that the night has fallen, or the morning has come.. A period void of time.. I could tell approximately how much time passed due to the bundles of wood...


    "Four days.." - my face showed no emotion, blankly I stared into the orange light of my fire-pit.. My wounds healed already, which could be considered crazy fast, I didn''t mind. The springs in my skin started to dissolve and hurt, plus I ran out of numb-berries.. a slight fever wasn''t a good sign.


    "I''m either addicted.. or that''s just infection setting in at last" - Yes, the giant wound from the bite was the only thing that didn''t heal completely yet.


    I''ve made two more pots and a cup of decent quality while waiting. I am running out of wood slowly as well, when the fire goes out, I''ll be stuck here in complete darkness. I didn''t hope for anything anymore though.


    ...


    I woke up to the sound of... nothing.


    "No fucking way.." - Slow as a sloth, I tried to open my eyes, which didn''t cooperate and tried to shut themselves and make me go to sleep right away. There was no drumming of rain anymore! Unbelievable, it was pouring non stop for nearly a week.. My stockpile of fuel ran out a few days before, I was drying some sticks I''d gathered in the darkness, but they were damp, barely provided any heat or light.. mostly smoke.


    I pushed the door away, revealing a bright new world... which was dark.. literally it was both. The sun was shining through the canopy, and it was bright enough to hurt my eyes that got so used to the darkness. On the other hand - everything was rather dark. All the trees were covered in a thin layer of dark moss, the grass, leaves - everything was filled with the same dark color. The ground had dark green patches of grass sprouting everywhere, even more moss filled the area. The short pur-map bushes as well numb-berries were bigger than I ever saw them be, and that was me just stepping a bit outside of the bushes I lived in.. Growing spree like no other. I mean.. even my hut was covered in a layer of moss, which seemed crazy.


    But there''s more.. As I looked up, I saw the trees light up in vibrant colors. It was something completely different, not moss or flowers, but mushrooms of different sizes sprouting from the bark at the top parts of the tree-trunk. The fact that I could see them from all the way down here, proved that they were immensely huge, bigger than anything I''ve ever seen in my life.. that''s what she said... dammit... Name any color - it was up there, and I was just standing there, speechless, trying to figure out what had just happened.


    "It''s suddenly almost like I''m... in a fantasy world.." - I snorted on the stupid thought.. Sure it was.. for a long time already..


    With a spear in hand I walked around for a bit, getting acquainted with the slightly different landscape. It was like someone painted over the old world. I brushed my palm against the soft green moss on a trunk of a nearby tree, it all seemed different.


    "I guess water washed away all my markings on the trees...or moss covered them.." - I realized after calming down from the new sight.


    My wounds had healed up properly, even though I was left with quite a bit of large bumpy white gashes all over my body. Scars covered me from the neckline, down to the heels of my feet. Figures.. my right forearm looked funny with two bite marks on it... one from a plant, one from a lizard.. Am I collecting them or what?


    The part of my mouth that was sliced open, now felt a bit numb - the scar covered quite a bit of skin. Well at least water didn''t spill when I drank any more..


    "And I don''t get myself covered in drool every few minutes.." - With a slight sigh, I''ve made my way back to the bushes hiding my small hut. Despite all this amazing stuff going on, I had chores to do and a schedule to keep track of. Besides, with all that sitting indoors, I''ve gotten a bit soft and mushy.


    "Out of food, out of wood, time to get going.." - I stumbled back into my hut to get the backpack, as well as a few spears and a couple of short spikes, just in case. I was going back into the territory of the tree-dwellers, so I wasn''t going to take any second chances. Before my schedule could return to normal, I had to secure myself some food once again, and with such sudden changes, I didn''t know just how much food I''d be able to get.


    "Check the traps, catch some fish and keep at it.." - dark moss sank beneath my steps and returned to it''s original condition as if it was memory foam. It slowed me down a little, but not like I couldn''t get used to it.. I was getting better at that.


    ...


    Good news was that the traps were still intact, bad news - half of them were covered in moss, and some had decomposed corpses in them, all of which were rat-bits. Seems like the tree-dwellers didn''t go after the rat-bits any more, and they avoided all of my traps as well. I was still alert, the memories of the recent fight were still fresh, the same went for the pain from the wounds.


    " It''s strange that they went after me.. I never saw them before that day.." - once again I was thinking about the whole situation, I did a lot of that during the rain. Starting the thoughts from the very beginning every damn time. I blamed the heat, it probably made food scarce to the point that mostly docile creatures attacked. It didn''t mean I was going to leave my spear or the newly made atatl anywhere, I''d kill anything coming at me.. try to at least.


    I finished checking the rat-bits traps, as well as moving the cadavers a bit further away from the rat-bit traps. The pit traps seemed fine and working, the moss covered only the top layer, making it less obvious to animals, or whatever might be walking over them.


    Something that I''ve added to my schedule - was making more traps, as something was telling me.. when the forest blooms, more animals might appear. Which means that far bigger predators might start lurking through the land.


    ....

 Chapter 15: Simple life

    My previous struggles of trying to survive became less of a burden, and more of a style of life. Yes, I was getting used the the way things were. Doing chores, training to keep myself sane, hunting, building and doing all sorts of small things at the same time. It wasn''t that easy of luxurious, but at the moment that was the way I lived. Besides, it''s been nearly a month already, so I really guessed that this was the way things were going to be, well.. I was planning to progress with my living conditions a bit, but for the most part, this was the way things were going to be.


    My idea that animals would go into a breeding frenzy or something, were partially true. I''d seen quite a few rat-bits running around during the day, which meant that they were simply waiting out the heat and searching for the scarce food during the night. That wasn''t necessarily the good news to me... As I figured by their areas of interest, they were scampering around the lush grass that sprouted in patches, the grass had rice-like grains growing out of the middle stems.


    At first I was happy for the new food source, but as I tried that - it didn''t sit well with me.. literally.. It made me vomit.. What''s worse - that new discovery of mine meant that all the other traps were rather useless.. as the rat-bits had enough food to simply avoid my ingenious fish bait.. I had to move the traps to the grass.


    The fact that the little guys weren''t fond of fish any more, made my schedule a bit empty.. which I greeted by adding another hour to my "leisure time".


    Something else I discovered accidentally was regarding the paper-leaves, which I considered useless for the most part. Well.. as I was throwing quite a bit of fish-bait back to the pond, I dropped some leaves into the water, quite a few to be honest.. I didn''t pay attention to it at first, but after a few days.. I was rather confused why the pale-whitish leaves became of the almost the same dark green colour as the whole forest.


    To my amusement, such change wasn''t the only one. As I closer inspected the leaves that I got out of the water, they proved to had become much harder, both to rip and to pierce. Not hard as leather, but like hard fabric soaked in bees-wax.


    "I could use that some way probably." - even though it probably could be used to make some sort of clothing, a poncho maybe. And that''s how half of my stash of bandages ended up inside the pond.


    Good thing I also found out. The lizard foxes were mostly scavengers, they seemed to avoid direct confrontation with me... but if the food would become scarce again, I''d make it into their menu once more. Simple and easy to understand.


    The issue I had with the forest - was that there wasn''t quite that many creatures, well.. I''m not talking about mammals or anything.. no. I meant that aside from mosquitoes, there was no insects. No ants, no bugs of any sort.. not even worms. I couldn''t quite get the finger on it.


    Next to that - I had a slight cold feeling in my stomach for the past week.. It''s probably to my habit of chewing on the pur-map paste, I''ll try to do that less.


    I am quite happy with my living conditions as well. Inside of my awesome moss-covered hut looks rather amazing. All over the place are bundles of pur-map leaves, which I was drying - as it makes for a stronger effect on the purple paste, and it''s easier to store.


    I have five pots now, one broke when I was firing it, but still, only one out of six that I made broke so far. Maybe I should have become an expert pot-maker. Speaking of pot.. I have been drying numb-berries, mashing them using a few stones and drying some more. Seems that such a process evaporates all of the chemicals that made me high, along with the healing properties. So, the numb-berry is hard to make any sort of healing potion, salve or paste out of, if at possible.


    I''ve got a whole lot more stone tools, and that includes the newly made stone knives - which were my proudest achievement in crafting to be honest. Flint-napping wasn''t something I had any idea how to do, so trail and error, and eventually I was armed with a knife.. well- it looked more like an oversized arrowhead, but did the job.


    ....


    I was going through the forest, trying to get better acquainted with a bigger territory this time. I guess you could say that I was slowly expanding my area of habitat. As I was going, I''d mark the trees using the stone blades, one by one - carving this time, so that I''d be able to find my way around.If you encounter this narrative on Amazon, note that it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    One thing to notice - The place where I found the man - was only about a few hours long jog in a straight line, seems I made a rather big semi-circle when I first arrived. Quite unnerving of a discovery, and I avoided going deeper into the direction of that area.


    I moved through the thick bushes, trying to keep low and make as little noise as possible.. to some extent I succeeded, but for the most part, I was just a bit too large to be completely unseen. I was looking for something particular, for something I noticed a few times along my day-long journey.


    "Once more here.." - I moved the round warm clump of digested grass.. or deer droppings, feeling that it was still.. ew.... warm. Grass in droppings meant that I came across a trail of some sort of a herbivore, and as there was no sign of digging or anything, I concluded that it wasn''t a boar. Which I''d be quite frankly hesitant to track. You see- boar could easily gravely injure an unprepared hunter...I was rather unprepared to hunt one.. so I decided to check the area for any signs before moving on.. smart, but stupid at the same time. Anything could be possible here, so what the hell, besides.. I was for the most part certain, that it was the same deer animal that I''ve encountered quite some time ago.


    The animal of interest seemed to circle the area, and as such I decided to look into that. I followed the path to the location where I first saw them, this time I was able to get quite a bit closer, still - closer meant that I was around thirty meters away from the herd. I say "thank you" to the pur-map paste, even though I was getting closer from a winded area, the deer-creatures noticed me just when I came into sight - but they didn''t run this time. My smell, however, was covered by the pur-map paste, which I had smeared on my skin. I was literally covered with purple smudge lines like a lazy kids sketchbook..


    "Is...is that a dick on its face?" - I really wish I was kidding, but from where I was standing - that''s was what I saw. The deers were so ugly, not in a cute way. Seriously, they had long snouts that hung and dangled before their mouth like... well lets say it looked very falic.. Some of them had short antlers, that had no sharp ends, but ball like protrusions at the ends - I thought those were males, according to the logic from Earth. Ones without antlers were either young ones, or the females. They didn''t seem like dangerous bunch, but I wouldn''t risk them seeing me next time..


    "I could try to hunt these deers." - the idea seemed to pop up just now. I wasn''t tracking them for the purpose of hunting, but more so to see what the animal was and if it posed a threat. It didn''t seem so.. so I planned to kill them and eat them.. such a typical human behavior.


    So the plans to expand my rations began, deer seemed like a rather beautiful addition to the food I had - and I had quite a bit less rat-bit due to them avoiding my fucking traps.


    ....


    I felt the sharp object pierce my skin, instinctively pulling my hand away. It drew blood, I cursed. I was really bad at sewing, even worse so at sewing using wooden toothpicks instead of a needle. I already hesitated if the idea was even worth it, making a whole poncho-with-a-hood-like-coat-thingy...out of the hardened green leaves.


    " It SHOULD work. Really, the...fuck.. the deers should not see me as fast.. and I might be able to get close..." - I occasionally looked up, the conversation with my new friend was going in circles. He was an adamant debate opponent.. well.. he was a dummy. I bundled some spare paper-leaves into a shape of a torso and just for the giggles made a head for it as well. A mannequin for me to hang the finished poncho or something.. I called him Eduardo. The lack of human interaction was ridiculously stressful. Even stuck at home I''d at least chat with some people, but here.. the isolation was getting on my nerves.


    "I know that they might notice my smell from far away.. but I have a solution for that." - I smiled wryly at Eduardo, he didn''t see the whole plan with the poncho as I did. Speaking to the imaginary conversation buddy wasn''t the worst part. Recently I developed a rather bad headache when I went to sleep, it came with static noise. Migraines maybe... Worst part - once every other sound dies off, I could swear I''d hear some whispers mixed in.. But that''s probably my brain trying to freak me out, seeing patterns where there are none.


    "I will soak the ready poncho in pur-map solution, making it even more invisible! .. I know, I know.. I should stop chewing it.. it''s just a habit... and I know that my gums have turned purple... Who''s side are you on anyway??" - I threw a broken needle into the dummy and looked at the almost finished product, I couldn''t hold a smile back.


    "It''s been two weeks after the rain, the deer will pass the same place the day after tomorrow.. they do so every three days.." - I was a bit hesitant to hunt them, but I was back in shape, and pretty confident in my new set of spears, which even had leaf fletching, not talking about the better stone spearheads.


    I was progressing with the hunting project slowly, the rat-bit population seems to have exploded in a way, they are stockpiling on the seeds from the grass.. Half the animals are not edible due to the same reasons that the seeds themselves aren''t. My well being depended on the outcome of this hunt.. and I was going to do it right.


    Now back to sewing.

 Chapter 16: The Hunt

    I was slowly creeping through the bushes, it was still twenty minutes of running until the opening where the deers would pass, but I wasn''t going to take any chances. Everything was ready, and I had to be ready as well. I tried to calm my breath, which was easier said than done - my muffled hot breaths made the green cloth around my mouth damp and warm.


    My hands blended with the darkness as I reached for a branch to move it out of my way, it was still early in the morning, and the forest was still more dark than dim. However that was the great time to get to the spot. As I made my way through the bushes, I appreciated just how much the pur-map mixed with ground coal was concealing me. Both my smell and my figure were almost invisible close to the bushes.. well - I hoped that was the case any way.


    The wind rustled the leaves of my poncho, making me seem like just another shrub, I was getting closer and could feel the tension build up. I didn''t know if the animals would pass here any time soon, I doubted that they had a tight schedule. Either way I was going to wait as long as it would take for them to get here.


    "Relax, it''s the same throw you practice every day. It''s not hard at all, just throw the stick and let it fly.. " - I was sweating a bit, last night wasn''t calm for me. Headaches, even though I''ve been off of pur-map for some time, they were getting worse.. and with that creepy noise constantly ringing in my head, I was losing it..


    No, not my mind, hell no.. It''d take a lot more than such petty thing to make me lose it.. I was loosing my cool, getting angry, breaking stuff. I wasn''t the most hotheaded guy, but my fuse seems to have gotten shorter. It wasn''t a sudden change to be honest, since the first day, it all was grinding at it, piece by piece.. Well, I was grumpy, so what.. didn''t mean anything. Fuck, besides I''d get a lot more frustrated due to lag, than this..


    ...


    An hour passed, but there were still no sign of deer anywhere. I had my doubts now. Maybe I misjudged the stupid animals, and they had no pattern in their moving through the forest.


    Rustling of leaves was like a song to my heart, I was able to see the whole herd move into the opening in the forest. It was quite large to say the least, and as they moved, I had trouble counting them. They do look almost the same, so don''t judge - or fuck off if you do.


    "Wait for them to get to eating.." - The herd would start chewing on the long grass in this area, that''s when I was going to strike.


    "Don''t aim for the little ones, nor for the females, aim for the average looking ones with the horns" - I reminded myself. The last thing I''d want to do is to kill a deer, with a potential deer inside of it, or an unripe one.


    My fingers were holding the atatl loaded with a spear this whole time, and I started to slowly get into position. The wind didn''t into my face, but the animals couldn''t tell I was there by the smell, nor their sight.. I wasn''t going to spook them with sound.. they were so close, I could see the strands of their short fur.


    "..." - My mind became completely blank, only the static noise and its whispering were present. Without any thought, no signal, no word or anything.. I took the shot. My blood rushed through my veins as my body shot into action. It was the best shot I had, and definitely one of the strongest so far. The leaves made a loud clapping sound, as if a whip thundered. the animals raised their heads, but the spear was already nearing it''s target. It hit the animal in the side with such force that it lost balance, all of the herd rushed into the woods away from me, scared.


    "... shit its getting away!" - I froze for a bit, but the animal didn''t seem to die that quick. Even with a spear nearly piercing through it, the deer ran into the forest, leaving quite an obvious crimson trail sparkled on the ground. A second later I rushed after it, holding my spears in the left hand, gripping them tightly with the three fingers.


    Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit."It didn''t die!" - I heard the animal run ahead of me, and I followed. Branches of small trees scraped at the bare hands as I dove into another set of bushes, only to emerge on the other side, listening to the rustling of the animal ahead of me, or - looking into the blood trail .. - the latter was a lot more difficult.


    "It''s not that big...that''s what she said.. but it didn''t die from a direct hit.. I broke my older spears when I tried throwing them like that.." - That''s why I had to make stronger shafts and spearheads, making the spears more akin to a javelin in shape.. that animal, surely wanted to live.


    " SH.." - As I dove out of another bush, I was barely able to jump over the deer that laid on the ground. My head was pulsating, and I was really close to throwing up because of the elevated heartbeat, but other than that - the hunt was a complete and utter success.


    "Oh god it''s alive!" - I thought the deer finally died.. but it was still alive, suffering, hurting, afraid.. a slight whining sound spread from it as it''s chest went up and down, breathing.. with a spear protruding from it.


    "Shit.." - It was painful to watch really, but I got on my knees and took out the stone knife. I wasn''t sure what the best way to act would be.. but I sliced the arteries on its neck, letting the animal die... and I didn''t waste time to hang it by it''s legs and start gutting it.


    ...


    "It''s not all that heavy.. i think" - the still warm and gutless body was around my neck and shoulders as I carried it towards my camp. It still had some blood on it, but that was small inconveniences that I would take care of some time soon. I could live off of this deer for quite some time, only if I''d be able to preserve it somehow. And somehow - meant that I was going to dry it and smoke it, besides.. I was making preparations before this hunt, so the whole upper portion of my hut was made into one giant drying rack.


    "But today I''ll eat as much grilled meat as I can fit into myself" - I was happy, with little to no luck with the rat-bits, I was left with only one option - to hunt deer.


    ...


    Deer meat was heavenly good, a bit hard to chew, as I wasn''t quite the chef, but it had great taste nevertheless.


    I ate so much, my stomach hurt afterward... Gluttony is a sin, bla bla bla.. but I''d overeat on deer meat any time of the day, no problem. Besides even after spoiling myself a little bit with such a feast, I still had at least two or three weeks worth of meat inside. My hut was filled with smoke, meat and herbs, but the worst thing - the mouthwatering smell was present here, every time I entered it would make me tear up a bit. But really. It smelled good, though I knew that I''d have to hunt some more if I wanted to have some meat stored. That would be two days from now, I couldn''t wait for the fresh meat already, well- not like I was craving for the drugged fish meat, but you get the point.


    ...


    "Jinxed... I jinxed it! I fucking missed.. SHIT.." - My foot landed on a small stick, sending it flying across the forest and into the nearby bushes. This time the hunt failed.. And it''s not like I did anything wrong, or different from last time.


    " I came there a few hours before them, Waited patiently, let them start eating, and then.. I missed." - Of course you can''t throw every time with one hundred percent accuracy, but.. but one miss was all that was needed to fuck up the tree day wait for meat. At least I caught a rat-bit two days ago, maybe some more will be there today as well.. My mood wasn''t the best..


    A few shrieks suddenly pierced my ears, as they echoed through the forest. High pitched, they went off one after another. First two nearly at the same time, then another one, and another one shortly after. I heard that damn sound before, on the first day.. but now it was coming from the direction of my camp.


    "..." - there was no thoughts to be honest, there were dangerous intruders somewhere near my house. The shrieks could mean only that they were hurt - caught in the traps.


    "The spike pits.. " - the half mask dropped from my nose and revealed the black colored face underneath. I was furious, and my teeth were grinding so hard, they could crack.. I made my way around, until I was in eyesight of the closest area with the trap.. the shriek has quieted down quite a bit, but there was still wailing.. I neared the source not believing my eyes.


    "Are you fucking kidding me.." - I exhaled cursing out loud as I saw the problem at my hands, and the source of the sound.. which looked right back at me and opened it''s mouth. Another shriek followed.

 Chapter 17: Get Off Of My Property!

    A shriek from up close pierced my ears, my face was distorted from the discomfort. The high sound was killing my ears, not literally.


    "Shushushushush!" - I tried to silence the toad-like creature that was terrified to find me coming closer. I was in a difficult spot to be honest. As to why I didn''t straight away murder the creature by piercing its throat with a spear.. well, that was the problem.. This one was obviously a kid. I couldn''t just outright kill a child.. even if it was a man-eating, toad-like goblin-thing.. besides it didn''t look as ugly as the ones I saw, it was just a smooth-skinned, big eyed and giant mouthed .. bald alien kid.. I DON''T KNOW how to describe it, and it was obviously aware of the fuck up it has gotten itself into.. My shushing didn''t help to calm it down, besides its foot was pierced by a spike trap, covered by the moss - so pain was fueling its fear quite a bit.


    "SHUT UP!" - I barked at it, slapping the little one with an open palm. I was against killing it, hurting was a part of not killing.. whatever, it stopped shrieking. It whined though, which sounded like a mix of whining and croaking.. It covered itself with its tiny hands. Finally some piece and quiet to think..


    "Four shrieks.. four traps.. four small toads.." - I looked at the situation, trying to figure a reason.. and there was a perfect reason for all that. My fingers rubbed the bridge of my nose, why the fuck did have to deal with all this?


    "Kids are fucking stupid no matter what race!" - I grumbled as I looked at the child angrily, it was still in pain. As my hands reached down to its foot, the toad tried to kick me, and paired with the tiny sharp claws, it made a slight cut on my wrist.


    "That doesn''t help!" - The thing didn''t understand me.. of fucking course it didn''t.. why would it? I showed it the cut, pointed at it, then showed it my stone knife, then pierced the moss with it. The thing shook like a leaf, continued whining, but didn''t try to claw at me.. seems like my point came through. I made a noose from a rope I had with me and threw it around the toads neck.. just in case it decided to bolt off, well.. now that I think about it, not with a wound like this.


    "ok.." - I grabbed its foot and grabbed onto the top of the spike.. The toad was obviously whining, hell, it was totally crying.. any kid would.. I pushed onto the spike and pulled the leg, more shrieking for a short while, a few cuts on my arm, but the foot was free... and bleeding. The toad tried to crawl away as it saw me reach behind my back, I yanked the rope and got its head into a choke-hold. The thing was opening that big mouth to reveal no teeth, the rim was just covered in hard protrusions, it was literally like a mouth of a bullfrog.


    "If you scream, I will hit you..if you bite, I''ll hit you even more.." - I''m great with kids. As my right hand was holding the thing in place, and held to the lower part of the mouth, I threw a numb-berry in the opened shriek machine and forcibly closed it. A few moments later it swallowed the berry, and in half a minute seemed to calm down - the numb-berries were amazing. I ripped a paper-leaf from my poncho, wrapping the foot of the child tightly.


    "Fuck.. four more to go." - I yanked the rope, and the toad shuffled behind me. I knew the foot wouldn''t hurt for some time, so I had to get going.


    ....


    I left the three toad-goblin children tied to a tree, while I went to get some more paper-leaves. Yep, one of them was unlucky.. and now I was carrying its corpse along with me, as well as the cause of all this. I lied the body on the ground, to the terror of the little toads, they already saw what had happened to their friend.


    "So was it worth it?" - I angrily threw the four rat-bits on the ground before the toads. They understood that I figured it out, and not only that but I was furious. I picked a rat-bit up and held it closer to the toad children as I yelled.


    "Was this! WORTH THAT?" - My voice thundered as I pointed at the tiny body wrapped in paper-leaf. They trembled, the huge eyes were filled with all sort of emotions, and I myself - was devastated..


    "Fucking idiotic children... FUCK!" -My body simply relaxed, as if giving up... I was responsible for this, and I was angry with myself, toad children and the whole situation at the same time.


    ...


    "I''ll regret it..." - I was walking through the forest slowly, dragging the little toads behind me on a leash, as well as carrying the parcel with the dead child.


    "But.. I can''t kill kids.." - the spears which were tied together were catching onto the bushes and hitting the occasional tree. I didn''t like what I was going to do soon.. but I was going to do it anyway..


    This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it"Why couldn''t it have been something else... WHY KIDS?" - My thoughts were haphazard and lacked any construction, they were scattered, as I could not concentrate to save my life. I was doing something that was contrary to my own survival..


    "I know what will come next.. FUCK!" - My eyebrows were showing regret and anger, I even had a vein swell on my forehead, really, emotions were rushing all at once.


    I stopped... That was the spot, the place where I''ve seen the adult toad goblins butcher a human. There was the bush to the left of me, I laid there.. watching. Now I stood there, with a rope holding a bunch of younglings, as well as a dead body on the ground. Almost nothing was different, I had some tools, had a bunch of spears with me, a tattered after turning into bandages- poncho.. but other than that.. I was still the same person..


    My chest pumped up as I inhaled air, I could feel my lungs stretch and fill up with air.. a bit more, then even more once again... and then I yelled on top of my lungs, letting the voice echo through the forest. Thundering sound hurt my own ears, made my chest vibrate, but I kept at it until my throat began to hurt..


    The kids on the leash jumped in surprise, and then I stopped. I looked down on them and poked them with the atatl, opening my mouth. One of them seemed to get the point, as he let out a shriek, others followed him after a few moments.


    "Enough.. shut up." - My hoarse voice sounded like rusty old sandpaper getting scratched on itself, not pleasant.. I bumped one of the screamers with an atatl on the head, one by one they stopped shrieking - it seemed like they adapted rather quickly.


    I took a breath and took out the spears, setting them up near me. Then loaded one into an atatl, my movements were filled with a bit of desperation, it hurt me to do so, and would hurt me inevitably. The toadlings croaked something jumbled, but I just shushed them.


    "Now I wait for them to come..." - I guessed that the toads would get the message, but I didn''t think it would produce the results it did..


    ...


    I focused my eyes on the spot where I''ve heard the rustling noise from. Something was running through the forest, and I was sure that it was a toad-goblin. I aimed. More rustling followed from the same direction.. a lot more.. fucking hell, did the whole toad village run here or something? It was getting closer and closer, I won''t lie that I wasn''t nervous, a cold sweat trickled down my spine, that was until I saw the first one come into sight. A toad mug peeked out from behind a tree, it seems that it was the first one from many, as the rustling in the distance didn''t cease. It saw the kids, and eyed the threat. Somehow it didn''t seem as menacing now, the short legs and burly body wasn''t all that scary, but I knew that they were capable of hunting a human..


    A few more appeared, then even more.. It seems like they felt a lot safer with such an amount, as they snarled and started walking towards me, they were still quite far. Most of the rustling stopped and curious toad eyes looked at me in dozens, some taking cover between the leaves, some peeking up from the grass. All of them had some sort of crude weapon, and one of them looked different - for one he was a bit larger, and secondly- had some sort of a headpiece or something. Being the only one without a weapon - made me conclude that he was some sort of a leader amongst them, so he surely was important somehow.


    The toads were slowly walking towards me, I didn''t hesitate..


    Exhale, inhale.. The whole process to me seemed like an eternity, a then came an explosion within me.. My spear soared through the air and went past the approaching toads, striking the tree next to the toad with the hat. It was too fast to dodge, too unexpected.. and too powerful. Pieces of bark exploded like shrapnel, flying all over. Even though it lacked any power - it was quite a sight to be honest.. and that''s forgetting the thundering crack of the wood.. It was a good throw..


    Panicked looks appeared on the faces of the creatures, but I was already loading a new spear..didn''t throw it though, the first one was a warning shot. Different pitched croaking went on from the "chieftain" of the toads, and the approaching ones stopped. The message was received.


    "I guess you don''t want to lose any men.. and before you get to me I''ll be able to kill quite a few.. smart choice" - that wasn''t something I''d gladly accept - the fact that the creatures had at least some sort of understanding and intelligence.. Though I calmed myself, it seemed like my plan was working. The chieftain stepped a bit forward, waiting, some toads were creaking at him, though a short croak shut them down. I didn''t misjudge, he was in charge.


    I tied the rope which I dragged the kids with to the paper-leaf wrapped body... and let them walk, thrusting the rat-bits to one toadling whose hands I untied. The look on my face was sad and disappointed, even through the black paint on it, that much was obvious. It didn''t look me into the eyes, staring onto the ground. As the kids approached the first line of toads, the adults looked at the parcel, and angrily croaked, which was followed by a whole outbreak of angry sounds..


    "...figures.." - Once again the chieftain croaked everyone quiet, this time with a significant delay and headed towards the children. A few croaks later his eyes were fixed on me, waiting. Can''t say I wasn''t waiting for something similar. I stabbed a spear into the ground and took out my knife. Holding it in reverse grip I stabbed the tree,which I stood next to, dragging the blade and leaving a deep cut. Marking my own territory like a wild animal.


    The line.


    I really hoped that the toads would understand that they should not cross it..I really did.

 Chapter 18: Outnumbered

    I waited for the goblin toads to leave before leaving myself, for a while I stood there - looking into the woods, trying to figure anything about these strange creatures. I had no idea how they lived, or even how far their habitat stretched. It''s tough to have something like that on your mind, and whenever I felt unease, whenever I was silent - the noise would come back, whispering eerily. To be honest, at first I blamed the migraines, for which I blamed the strange sleep schedule.. but the migraines left- leaving me with the whispers from within. I figured that it was caused by stress or something, or maybe I was losing my mind.. slowly, but surely.


    "Sh.skt..shhhhaa" - It kept scratching on the insides of my mind as I kept silently watching the unmoving woods. A slight wind picked up, breezing through the leaves of the dark green bushes. There was no more toadlings, so there was no more reason to keep watch. I picked up my belongings and moved in the opposite direction.


    As I went through the forest, marching on the soft moss with my bare feet, there was no one trailing behind me, not that I noticed anyway. Not even a slightest rustle from the direction They came. I hoped they would not follow, but I remembered the looks in the eyes of the toads... anger, vicious anger...and fear... it fueled a lot of conflicts before, and I guessed that it would do the same.. again.


    Fear.. memories of every encounter flooded me, as I slowly walked. The thought of the human I''ve seen came rushing into my mind.. he surely felt fear as he died. How could I forget? No.. that would be a lie, I''ve actually forgotten.. I was so fixated on the idea of surviving, of getting food... living here.. that I completely drowned the thoughts and memories of that first day.


    A human, he couldn''t just appear out of nowhere could he? I did..


    "Yes.. he definitely came from somewhere.. a city, village.. anything.." - I was nervous..the thoughts were more of a way to say to myself that there is hope, my sudden fear and feeling of loneliness urged me to run.. Toadlings knew where I was living, the whole village of them knew I existed..I wanted to run... escape.. Leaving everything behind, running as fast as I could..


    I didn''t.. I didn''t want to.. Even if there was a village somewhere, even if there was a way out of this forest, I wasn''t going to run there hastily, unprepared and chased out. No..


    I was walking for a few hours at least, and my nervousness, anxiety and slight fear subsided.. as if a foam from a boiling broth, leaving something else, showing the bubbling feeling that dwells deeper.. I wasn''t angry, I was calm, but it burned my insides like hot tar, sticking to me..


    "There''s no way some critters are going to scare me away.. This is my territory.. These woods are mine..." - I worked bloody hard to make this place, it was just starting to get better. That''s what I told myself, in reality - I still had no idea why the rage was building up, but despite my understanding - it kept burning..


    The trees revealed a small opening, a stream - a pond, and a lush patch of bushes that I knew as my own palm. I bowed slightly to enter my hut, my eyes reflected the slight glow of the fire-pit, I had work to do.


    ....


    The night came, slowly pulling a veil of darkness all over the forest. At night, everything changed - slight sounds became less frequent, until they stopped completely. Everything was quiet.


    I wasn''t an exception, as I was curled up - trying to keep my body warm, I didn''t make even a smallest sound. My spear was close to my body, it followed me even to bed, as I clutched it. Slight breeze made me tremble slightly from the cold. It was windy that night, more so than yesterday, the weather was getting worse.


    "Sha..shakkata" - During the night the whispering was persistent, as there was no sounds to make my mind drift off- they occupied all of my world. It was me, darkness and whispers. I wasn''t asleep, but I was sleeping - resting with my eyes closed, thinking of nothing.


    It was two days ago that I''ve met face to face with the tiny toadlings that made everything a whole lot difficult. I had to let them go, I could not do otherwise..


    Well.. it was in the past..


    Skch! - it wasn''t the whispering, I opened my left eye widely in slight shock.. I stared at the leaves of my poncho, pierced by a small spear, I could hardly breathe.. the slight crack echoed as it went in deeper.


    They actually came - the toad-goblins finally came..


    "GwarK!" - A burly figure appeared from the darkness, light from the fire was dying out - reflecting on the creature. Its face was happy- it slaughtered the one responsible for the death of a youngling. It croaked in delight - sounding like an opening beer-can, and others responded, the forest got a whole lot more noisy. I could hear them even through the deafening sound of my own heart racing.


    ".. too.. gullible.." - A spear left my grip softly, heading towards the ground as it slipped off of my shaking fingers. The toad just stood there staring..


    Staring into the darkness wide-eyed, as an almost silent thud echoed in it''s ears. The face covered with warts was frozen, with a long wooden pole going through the back of the toads skull. Blood and gore poured out of its opened mouth and slowly made its way down the shaft of the spear, the body twitched a bit. I could already smell the blood.. blood and other less appealing fluids and solids dripping on the ground. The blood foamed from the nostrils of the creature as it still reflexively tried to breathe, its body at least.


    The thin wooden spear, piercing the poncho, fell over, revealing Eduardo the mannequin. He valiantly took my place in the hut.. I never slept inside of my house after that day, leaving the hut to rest, tonight wasn''t different. This was one of the many precautions I''ve made to calm my mind, which was racing the same as my heart.


    My fingers nimbly picked up another spear, loading it into the atatl, and silently - launched it right at my next target. The spear silently pierced the night, hitting a clay pot secured in the top section of my hut. Another preparation.. A slight crashing noise echoed through the forest, followed by sizzling of the fire. A pot filled with water extinguished the remaining coals.. the only source of light nearby went out.. returning the darkness... I opened my right eye..


    "They should have listened to the warning.." - The burning sensation returned, or rather I noticed it again, as the feeling never left me.. I''ve already made my mind clear on the topic, I had whole two days to think about my actions. I wasn''t going to back down..The story has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.


    When the toads entered my forest, following the path their children took, they''ve sealed their own fates. They came into my territory with ill intent.. I was not going to let anyone get out of this part of the forest easily.


    "They''ve had an opportunity to turn around.." - I''ve started climbing down from my hiding spot, a tree trunk of the giant pine covered by a smaller tree. Silently - my bare feet felt the soft damp moss.. carefully my legs soared me through the forest.


    The fact that the toads didn''t attack during the darkest hours of the night meant only that they weren¡¯t nocturnal. So their eyesight - it was the same as mine.


    "If we see the same.. I have an advantage here.." - Evading my own traps and trees before me, I rushed ever so faster.. I knew my way around my territory, it was my ground. I circled around the group, heading to the place they entered through.


    "..." - My mind gotten blank, whispers followed me in the dark, pushing me slightly forward.


    ....


    "Croakk!"


    "CRACrakcrawk"


    The whole bunch of sounds started echoing through the seemingly empty forest, the toads didn''t meet with one of their own. The one that killed the villain, it was odd.. he should have returned by now, a grand hunter as him.


    They smartly made their way around the traps the young ones told them about, avoiding any danger on the way into the den of the beast. Something, however, was off.


    "Crararck" - Hasty voice full of alert rang out, after a slight pause the group swiftly bolted towards the place where they entered through, the signal to group up.


    They weren''t silent, or gracious - their burly bodies half-jumped, half-ran clumsily...


    A crashing sound thundered, followed by a wailing noise. The group abruptly stopped, someone got too far from the path and fell into one of the deadly traps. As it ran, the ground sank under the pressure, falling deeper spikes ran right through the skin, bone and flesh.. what''s more - other spikes, lined downwards didn''t let the foot to be pulled without wedging the spiked deep into the leg..


    After a brief croak, part of the toads went to help one of their own... but as they made their way into the darkness, the wailing of the hurt toad stopped abruptly.. A shriek, then a sound of a whole bunch of toads rushing towards the rest of the group. The toads, seeing their comrades run, one without his spear - felt a chill run down their spines.. The toad goblins came as a group of fifteen.. now, however, only thirteen remained. The plan was failing..


    Croaking had both anger and fear mixed in it, pushing each other they''ve made their way along the safe path.. So close, just a few more minutes and they would be gone from the dangerous den.. that was..until a spiked stick shot out of the bush and pierced the stomachs of two of the toads in front. They didn''t even croak or shriek, the impact had left them breathless - literally. The sound was more like hitting a wet rag against the floor, the fate of these unfortunate was settled...


    Most of the group stopped, while a few of them rushed forward, fear made them run without thinking.. and it didn''t let them cease their movement. Sound of bodies falling, crushing sticks and twigs, as well as more sudden rustling echoed in the night.. there was a lot of blood chilling shrieks. Pain - it filled the air as a thick fog..


    The path that seemed safe, was no longer so. Twelve was left, including the one screaming in agony, trying to get its foot out of the hole in the ground.. to no success.. their number was going down rapidly. Most figured that those who got separated would die soon.


    ...


    I held to my side while looking at the group of toads from behind a tree. My ears were ringing, and I had to clench my left fist to stop the shaking. Even though I was following the plan, it was still nerve-wracking.. This was no ordinary hunt, and truth be told - it didn''t go that well for me.


    The toads weren''t moving, and I only killed a few of them.. There were still so many! Far too many..


    "Shit.." - I applied pressure to my side with a palm that held a paper-leaf. Sooner or later the plant would do its thing and start sprouting and closing the wound.. - "I wasn''t fast enough to get close to that frog... fuck..."


    The first one - toad that had its foot stuck in the pitfall trap.. I heard it scream in agony, and rushed in for the finishing blow... I killed the wailing creature with a stab of my spear, but as I was getting it out of the unmoving body - others came rushing. With a dead toad pierced on the spear, I was in a tricky situation, so I flung the bleeding projectile towards it''s former comrades. I felt blood splat on my own body, as well as covering my feet.. Blood was really sticky when there was this much of it..


    The toads ran away in fear, but not before one of them threw a spear at me.. It only grazed my right side, as I was able to dodge.. unfortunately the tip was crudely made from a shard of bone, which wedged itself under my skin and into the flesh as a splinter - a huge splinter. I could get it out, but it bled excessively... what''s worse - there was still some bone in under my skin apparently. However taking care of that had to wait..


    "Why aren''t you lot moving?" - The toads were waiting for something, quietly croaking between themselves. As if the deaths of their people didn''t matter... Then I figured it out.. they were waiting for the daylight - at least that was the only explanation I could come up with, waiting until it got a bit brighter. If they thought that they could look for my traps and avoid me at the same time, these critters were gravely mistaken. I wasn''t going to let them come up with a plan..


    "If you insist on not moving.." - I threw a spear towards the group, movement was close to being automatic. Throwing the spear made a bit of noise as I grunted, but the projectile hit its target - piercing the soft-looking protruded belly of a frog, going right through it''s insides. Croaking mixed with the sound of throwing up blood, the air was already smelling of blood so much - it made me want to gag.


    "Seems like I''ve hit it somewhere along the liver.." - I didn''t wait to see, the creature would not survive a spear going through its intestines, like a stick through a marshmallow.


    I hoped for them to scatter, but the toads immediately followed me. It didn''t even take them a second to figure out where the spear came from, dammit - I was a bit too hasty. Now I was being chased, which meant that I couldn''t lead them directly to the traps. They noticed when I avoided something in the dim lighting and followed almost exactly step by step.


    "How can they be that fast.. being that fat.." - My breathing was rather heavy, but the toads didn''t lose track of me, not falling behind almost at all. Their clumsy looking way of moving was faster than it seemed at first glance.


    "There is no way I''m able to get far enough.. " - My heart was beating hard and fast, I was really pumping adrenaline through my veins right now. I didn''t feel the pain as much, but I could not run forever..and I didn''t. I dove behind a bush, waiting for the frogs to come closer.


    As I heard them clear the last bunch of steps, I hit them with the spear, as if it was a baseball bat - putting the weight of my whole body into the strike. The wood cracked and broke - sending splinters in every direction, but the frogs stopped as they saw the ones in front get hit by something again. Their reactions were sharp.. I used the moment of confusion to stab the closest one to me with the sharp piece of the broken spear handle before diving behind a tree again. Blood gushed out of the pierced throat - slowly leaving the body of the creature.


    The toads, however, got faster, as if they were running slower on purpose before, and surrounded me in no time.. As I stood with my back to the tree, the ugly creatures started getting closer, closing the semi-circle that they''ve made, not risking going around me - as it meant moving in closer. Sooner or later - they would attack, and then I won''t be able to do anything..


    "Ten to one..." - I was panting.. My side hurt with each breath I took, the tiny pieces of bone piercing my flesh. Even the feeling of the paper-leaf spiraling inside of my wound, coiling through my flesh was less painful. At least I didn''t bleed much - I had no numb-berries on me, so no instant pain relief. Sweat was slowly trickling down my face.. turning black as it mixed with the black paint covering my whole body.


    Everyone was hesitant to make the first move, looking for any sign of weakness in the posture of each other, even a slightest movement would cause the fight to erupt. My spear moved and the toads rushed - closing the distance rapidly.

 Chapter 19: Stand-off

    With my back to the wall - I seemed to be cornered, if I was going to run - it was already too late. I could feel the moss brushing against the skin of my back, damp and slightly cool.. The goblins were closing in at astonishing speeds, their movements were beyond any expectation I''ve had... I didn''t think they were as fast on their feet. At least I had one advantage over them still, I was the one who chose the fighting field.


    My spear reached the rope faster than the attackers reached me, releasing the sprung thick branches, covered in spikes. The whole area before this tree- was a semi-circle of these deadly traps oriented in different direction. As they were hidden below the moss - even I could have trouble finding it if not for the carvings on the trees. Four total paths led to this spot, lined to the same position.. my last stand, waiting for me to stand with the back to the three.. making me look like a cornered victim. Maybe I was cornered, but as far as being a victim - I had my doubts.


    It was a slight diversion, the spikes wouldn''t be enough to kill every one of these creatures.. but it ought to buy me some time.. if even a moment.. more importantly - didn''t allow to jump me all at the same time. Can''t dodge everything can I?


    One of the toads was struck right in the face, the sound was like a baseball bat hitting a watermelon.. a watermelon filled with minced meat and bones... its body was dangling on the spikes like a Christmas tree decoration.. A bloody - dead-eyed decoration, oozing brain matter on the moss below the body. It''s eye was popped, flopping out of the pierced socket like a deflated balloon..


    Three toads were able to dodge the spikes and advance towards me, their bone-tipped spears aiming for my body. Despite the size - they were rather terrifying, like a pack of feral dogs.. vicious. Instead of dodging sideways, or trying to increase the distance - I rushed right into them, using the advantage of my far longer reach to kill at least one of them. Lets say - my lack of experience in fights to the death wasn''t of the best help.. I felt a hit with my whole body - the spear struck a toad to the right right under the collarbone, skewering the creature and pushing the stone blade of the weapon through its body, scraping on the bone and going through its organs. It was like piercing a needle through a very dense fabric... I didn''t follow through with this hit, as I grabbed the spear of the middle goblin-toad before it could reach me.. though somehow misjudged the distance, causing the bone tip to slice open the palm of my hand, scraping my wrist - but, despite the grip becoming slippery, I was able to throw the toad sideways, knocking it right into the furthermost left creature of the trio. .. that was just the fraction of a second - happening nearly instantaneously..


    I did drop the spear, but I wasn''t without a weapon - I grabbed the newly made atatl, which simply dangled on my wrist all this time and only now realigned myself by making a few light steps sideways - trying to regain balance. Two toads were already flanking me - one armed with a spear - other, with a stone hatchet. The first approached me from my left side, as the other - from the opposite direction. I couldn''t block both at the same time, so I attacked the closest one - the toad with a stone ax. As the weapon soared towards my side, aiming for the ribs - I instinctively tried to block it with my left arm.. The piercing pain from my left calf nearly made me fall - the toad armed with a spear reached me before its partner. It jumped - that''s how it reached me first! The toad was now making the spear turn due to the momentum of its body.. excruciating pain made me yell and lower my head as my knee bent due to the force.. It made me kneel.. Something snapped - relieving the pressure on the wound.. the spear didn''t last long, breaking the tip off I wasn''t able to appreciate the relief, as the strike of a dull stone ax found the top-left part of my forehead.


    CRACK! - I felt dizzy immediately, after the sudden thundering sound of my own skull being cracked open, I heard a long - wailing bell ring. My eyes blacked out for a second, as I shuffled through the darkness blindly - trying to move away. By now the light was already seeping through the dark-green canopy, however.. I was surrounded by darkness alone, feeling blood rushing down the side of my head. Then.. it all became quiet, I couldn''t hear a thing, not even my own heartbeat. I tried to stand up - which was hard to do, and even harder to remain standing, however I clung to my life.


    My eyes were wide open, and through the darkness, blurry silhouettes started to resurface. As if someone took a blindfold off of my face. I was badly hurt, but this.. This..was the first time I fought like this.. No experience could prepare me for anything of a kind.. I was about to throw up, but it was most likely due to the concussion.


    I saw the two toads rushing to their feet, seemed like the spear-toad that hit me, also hit his comrade that landed a strike on my head. There were more of them coming my way, six more - if you forget these two. Eight in total..


    There was no chance for me if the toads were to regroup.. however reckless the actions may look like.. I had to take them out as soon as possible.


    "I am bigger than them..." - somehow, that was reassuring me as I rushed at them full speed, nearly losing my balance and falling head first into the two that were getting up. Last step - I''ve put my whole body weight into the single point, rotating my sole and allowing the momentum to bring the heel of my right foot forward. I wasn''t the most flexible, but there was no need to rise the foot too high - when you fight creatures half your height. A strike to the face sent the toad tumbling backwards.. It didn''t fly dozens of feet away - simply fell and tumbled once. The neck of the toad flapped back and back straight, making a cracking sound.


    As my foot hit the ground, I made a backwards swing, striking the ax wielder in the face. The atatl broke, the toad though attempted to block the hit with the weapon. The wood of my club shattered as it popped the large thumb of the toad, which the hit landed on, like a pea in the microwave...splat... I saw the bone pierce the skin and flesh, as the blood gushed under pressure. The toad was fine, but its allies were close, so I grabbed it by the throat and ran away, dragging and throwing it in the direction of a moss-covered boulder. It hit the ground like a sack of potatoes, crushing its knee on the stone. I saw the knee bend the other way, as the lower half of the foot followed in the same manner. I hoped it would break its skull.Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more.


    I vomited due to the concussion, no spasms - just vomit all over myself and the moss under my feet. Truth be told- that was the least of my concerns at the time.. I changed the direction, turning one hundred and eighty degrees.. yes, rushing back at the toads, as I grabbed a large dry branch from the ground, raising it while I charged at them. Neither of us was in the position to evade.. so a crash followed. Ever seen two cars collide? Less steel, more flesh.. This time, I wasn''t able to remain on my feet. The ringing had gotten louder, deafening - nauseating..


    I felt around with my hands - grabbed a part of the branch that broke off, pushing myself up. Without even fully standing up I struck the closest toad with the sharp stick, piercing its skin. I was able to pull myself up, forcing my whole weight on the sharp piece of wood wedged into the side of the creature. Blood poured out of the open wound, but the cut was not deep. I struck it once again - this time in the ugly face. The toad tried to block the strike with its hand, which under my weight got stabbed right through. Just like a piece of meat being struck through by a nail and a hammer.. I kept stabbing the mug of the goblin-like toad, and the pierced arm moved along with every move. The face had more and more holes in it, bleeding, showing flesh and gore.. Which for some reason was black..


    Now that I noticed.. everything has been in gray-scale for a while. My shaking hands had let go of the stick as I felt one of the creatures jump on my back, trying to choke me by wrapping its slippery hands around my neck. I slammed backwards, trying to shake it off my body.. something pierced my side.. the branch - it went through the toad and wedged itself right into my right side..


    Fighting has gone from planned to haphazard just in a matter of seconds.


    Three toads were slowly approaching me, slowly, as they had pieces of splintered wood stick out of their bodes. Going right through, or simply wedged deeply. They were the only ones that were able to keep going, others - were either dead, or incapacitated. I wish my condition was any better, which sadly wasn''t the case. My vision already started fading, and I saw black spots move over the bodies of the toads..


    "SH.SHASHckck!" - the whispering suddenly thundered in my head, as if a plane taking off right next to me. I couldn''t comprehend where it came from, the direction.. It seemed to come from my own body, from the ground and even from the fucking toads. The sound roared, threatening to split my head open and scramble the brain..


    They were hesitant to attack, seen what I was capable of, but they didn''t back of, as too much has been done already.


    I wanted to take a step, however, pain slowly but surely took over,making me lose the ground for a split second. No other sign was needed.. the toads jumped me, I felt their claws ripping my skin and their teeth biting into me. My left palm was being crushed between the jaws, as another toad tried to reach my neck. I couldn''t tell what the last one was doing, as we all became a tangled mess of bodies struggling and flailing, trying to rip each other into tiny pieces. Anger and desperation pushed me further, as I pushed my left hand, holding the toad down with my right knee. Sounds were getting to the point of being intolerable, I wanted that to stop, I proceeded to slowly wedge my palm between the teeth of the toad.... The weight of my own body, as well as it''s flailing comrades had pinned the creature down.. The bone-like protrusions of its spiked teeth ripped my skin as I pushed my arm into and down its throat. I could feel something rip and crack as I jerked my hand violently, ripping flesh and skin each time. As my hand slipped out, it felt like a wet glove coming off, a warm - slightly sticky glove..


    With the last of my strength I was able to fall backwards, crushing the head of the toad that was biting onto my shoulder, the teeth scraped my bone as its jaws broke open - bones piercing the skin within the mouth and starting to fill its throat with blood. It tried to shake me off, but the bite held it firmly in place under my weight. It was suffocating.


    I held the last creature with its back towards myself, it was positioned at a ninety degree angle to the direction of my body.. I bit into its neck, ripping right through the rather thin skin.. my left hand clawed its eyes out as I used the eye socket to hold onto it.. my right hand was pulling the jaw downward, opening its mouth wider and wider.. slowly.. until the feeling similar to a dozen of strings ripping one by one in succession resonated in my fingers. Then the jaw came off, causing my hand to fling rapidly and hitting the ground with the ripped out part of the body.


    ThumpThumpTHump! - I could hear my own heartbeat again.. The noise disappeared in an instant.. It sounded like someone was hitting the drum-barrel full force, but it was a good noise. White sky was peering through the dark green canopy.. the body of a dead toad slid off me, laying on the moss.. it looked as if the creature was resting its head on my body. My vision started to darken, and within a moments notice.. I''ve lost consciousness...


    ...


    I tried to force my eyes open, but I couldn''t.. Slowly I pulled my hand over my face, forcibly opening my eyelids, which were stuck together due to the blood.. well.. the right one at least. I thought I died, but somehow- I was still breathing.


    "Have to start on the paper-leaf" - My somewhat clear mind made me reach towards the wound on my side.. The blood was more or less dried out. The whole body hurt all over, but.. I didn''t feel any sign of severe blood loss, which was going to be the case at least..


    "All... this.. because some kids wandered off and tried to steal my rat-bits... " - I struggled, trying to sit up, but I regretted it immediately.. The spear that broke inside of my calf.. well - it was still right there, surrounded by dry blood.. there wasn''t that much I could do really, it didn''t seem to bleed...but I tied my leg with the rope that served me as a belt, restricting the flow of blood to the wound.. I grabbed onto the bone tip and prepared to push the shaft.. there was no point in waiting..


    My screams were flooding any other sounds in the forest as I gripped the removed spearhead in my hand. Once I could think again, I heard some noise moving away from where the fight took place. The pain could wait, there was more important matters to tend to.. Gritting my teeth, I pulled myself up and went looking for my spear, barely walking.

 Chapter 20: Disobedience is punishable

    My whole body hurt all over, with every step I took I could feel the echoing of pain soaring through every muscle and every inch of skin. I guess that was the only thing keeping me awake.. well... no, probably there was another. I was still not done.. one of the toads was missing. I clearly remembered that one of them had it''s leg broken.. it was gone, crawled away while I was unconscious.


    "I most likely looked dead enough.. so it felt like trying to get out was the best... " - I slowly came closer to the source of sound, and as I did.. it became a lot clearer.. silent cries, muffled as if someone was trying his best to not let any sound fly out of its mouth. Obviously - it failed at that.. I brushed the occasional branches of low trees away, paying attention to every sound. As I circled around a set of paper-leaf bushes I came upon an unexpected discovery, it really made me rise my eyebrow.


    ".. a leg?" - I stared at the curved lump of bloody meat. It was the whole broken leg, down from the kneecap - just lying on the moss. Suspecting that it could be a trap, I avoided stepping too close to the body part, at the same time trying to figure out the reasoning behind such an action. Doubting that the pain from the broken foot could justify removing your foot, I eyed the surroundings - looking for any signs of an ambush. None, though I found the blood trail on the moss - no way to fake that is there?


    "You aren''t a lizard.. and I''m most certainly not eating that foot.." - At least if the foot was moving and twitching.. no - that''s a stupid reason to throw a leg away - thinking that the thing chasing you would be satisfied with just that.


    ...


    The toad was crawling forward, dragging its slowly bleeding stump behind it. It produced quiet screams of pain with every pull, each time it moved. The creature tried to get as far away as possible, survive at any cost. It was barely conscious, blind and deaf to the surroundings, desperately clawing its way forward. The beast was still there, he was certain that the tribe killed him, even at the cost of their lives.. but it didn''t die.. It slept leisurely, surrounded by the corpses of his family, covered in their insides.. Toadling had to get away, further away..


    My eyes were fixated on the slowly crawling figure, as its shaking fingers pulled on the green moss.. I was watching it struggle, narrating the whole thing in my mind, trying to understand it.. I poked it with the spear, but the toad was oblivious to the sensation, it seemed like trying to move forward was the only thing it could do.


    "Can this be even considered alive?" - I lifted my foot from the back of the creature, letting it slowly inch forward once again. The only thing I could remember - was the experiment with the frog in a pot of boiling water.. If you heat the water slowly, the animal won''t suspect anything until it''s whole body simply cooks.. Oblivious to its own death..


    "Can''t watch this anymore.." - the blunt end of my spear landed on the head of the toad, I reached down and started dragging it towards my own camp. There was a whole bunch of cleaning up to do..


    "I guess I''ll patch you up a bit.. "


    ....


    I sat in the ice-cold water of the stream, slowly pouring it on my skin. The stream turned black from the blood and paint covering my body. Walking around with the gore all over the fresh wounds, wasn''t the best plan..


    "The cuts are definitely there.. My fingers slid over the exposed flesh. It felt spongy, even a bit dry.. It was like taking a piece of bread, mushing it in your hand and leaving for a while to dry. When water washed the closed wounds, they felt a bit slimy - still, I was grateful that the bleeding didn''t continue.


    "It doesn''t seem to be regenerating.." - A slight smile appeared on my face. I couldn''t stop myself from chuckling lightly, considering how much numb-berries I''ve been taking, pur-map, and even the wound closing paper-leaf.. the fact that I didn''t know what was going on with my body, wasn''t all that unexpected. Mix a whole bunch of drugs and then think you''re something special because your blood clots really fast, ye.. wasn''t going to happen. Being cocky due to a lucky coincidence - not the way I roll.. I was never that happy to receive good news, as there certainly was something fishy going on, and the bad news would always trample everything to the ground..


    "It''s not something I''d be so happy about.. if the blood clots easily, there''s a possibility of a clot traveling through the body until it clogs something up and I die.." - Somehow the lucky healing didn''t seem like such a godsend anymore. Pessimistic? No.. just accepting the thing for what they are - shitty.


    "AArgh!"


    "Shut up!" - I barked as the one-legged frog wailed again. I looked at the creature angrily as it looked at me with eyes full of fear. I wondered.. I knocked it out unconscious, tied it up to a tree and wrapped the stump with paper-leaf. Merciful to be honest, the toad should be more grateful. Maybe it wasn''t all delighted to wake up to a sight of me dragging the bodies of its tribe mates into a pile, like timber, but more likely it didn''t enjoy the sound of an ax landing on the necks of the corpses. It tried to free itself as I was busy beheading the bodies, putting the heads into a woven basket, leaving the bodies to bleed out near the pond.


    ".. you know what?" - I stood up and went closer to the toad, sitting on the ground before it. - "I couldn''t help but notice.. you guys, don''t seem to have any tattoos on you. The guy you killed had this."


    I raised my arm with the back of my palm facing the toad, it stared at it blankly. - " From the whole body, you''ve left the arm with the fucking mark.. Why?"


    I pushed my palm into its face until it hurt, squeezing the head between the mark and the tree. It tried to move away from it, not afraid - just avoiding it. I exhaled, this was useless... the frog couldn''t explain shit..If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.


    "I''ll figure this sometime later.." - I was annoyed, but still, there was time for everything, and right now - I had to do a bit more dragging. But before that, it was important to make myself presentable, looks were important!


    "Can''t walk around with my wounds being visible.." - My fingers slid across my face, smearing black paint over the skin. Covering my own scent seemed a bit important, but hiding the fact that I was wounded- seemed to be a higher priority.


    ...


    It took a while to drag the noisy critter to the place, but the stage had been set, it was time to call the audience. Besides, it really seemed like my hostage had lost patience, it was flailing around and yelling, despite the gag that was wedged into its large mouth.


    "..let me help you with that." - I untied the rope. As the gag fell to the ground, the blood-chilling screams of the creature pierced the heavens themselves.


    "Shit.. Why are you screaming so loud all of the sudden? You were almost timid for the past few hours.." - My face curled in slight disgust and pity. The toad was wailing as if it was in great pain, and I didn''t even do anything, well..


    "Maybe it does look a bit terrifying" - I looked at the area in front of us. The moss was pierced with stakes all over the place, and not just empty ones at that, most had toad heads impaled on them. Really... call me Vlad. There was enough empty spikes to have at least twice as many toad heads be impaled on top of them, sometimes the most graphic display of power is the one and only option.


    "I really hope that this time they will get the message" - I stood there, a black motionless figure with a dozen of spears stuck in the ground behind me, with a toad tied to a tree by my side, overlooking a grim scenery of disfigured faces looking forward to meeting the toad-goblins once more. The deafening scream was the bell, calling the tribe to see the results of their decisions.


    ...


    "You sure are persistent" - I eyed the tied up frog, it''s screams had become hoarse after a while, until apparently its vocal cords couldn''t go on any more. Right now it was still trying to yell, but nothing came out. Its veins bulged out, and as the mouth opened wide, there was nothing but silent attempts to cry. All the effort in vain, the pained face made me shiver a bit, a horrible sight to behold..


    From the same spot, hidden behind the bushes in the distance, my audience finally arrived. Seems like this time, there was only the chief-toad and a few spear-toads escorting him. I straightened my back, trying to look harmonious to the gruesome and disgusting scene that I''ve laid out on the field.


    Toads had terror reflect in the folds of their warped faces, even from this distance - I could sense it. The forest was nearly completely silent, except for the hoarse breaths which came from the flailing hostage.


    Chieftain moved forward, the soldiers followed him - gripping their weapons, but I didn''t have to react, as a sudden whip with the back-side of the palm to the face of the closest warrior showed that the elder was pissed off.


    "Crawk!" - He croaked with a somewhat tired voice, it seemed strange to me. There was too much anguish, sadness and crushing defeat in this voice. What''s more - all of that wasn''t directed at me, but at his own tribe. I carefully studied the face of the approaching toad, it had more wrinkles than a pug, but such facial feats showed the age and experience.. the toad lived for long enough apparently, but what could I possibly know about the aging process of a completely different species. Much like before - the toad had no visible weapons, but I wasn''t going to let my guard up - if the creature gives me even a slight reason to worry - its head will be pierced by a spear..


    "... crekkkk"- A disappointed murmur resonated from the throat of the chief-toad as he passed the spikes and walked close to one of the impaled heads. Even though I couldn''t get the "words", the expression of its face and the eyes made me realize.


    "It''s not disappointed of them as of warriors that failed a mission.. wait.. don''t tell me that they disobeyed their Chieftain.." - I looked down at the tied up toad, the ropes had scratched off patches of skin as it violently thrashed, trying to scream.


    ...


    Five large strides separated me from the elder toad as it stopped. It has looked at the suffering hostage for just a brief moment, but then - completely ignored the creature, that seemed cold .. and that would be an understatement. As if the desperate creature that ripped its vocal cords screaming, was already dead..


    "None of my business.." - I looked directly in the eyes of the chieftain, he did the same.. but then.. it lowered its head, then its whole body to the ground and showed me his arms, palms up.. Complete submission.. For the elder - the trip wasn''t for the sake of saving the hostage, but for the sake of showing that the tribe begs for forgiveness.. in the stead of the warriors that didn''t, that were too hot blooded to listen to the warning and obey the commands of the chief. This wasn''t at all what I''ve expected.. but.. it was what it was..


    ....


    After a few minutes remaining on the ground, the elder backed away - facing me until it was "far away", then turned around and slowly went back to the spear-men. It''s then was that I realized - they weren''t going to take the hostage with them, but were leaving him here.


    "Hey!" - My voice echoed through the forest, making the toads jump in alert and the elder quickly turn its head in fear. I pointed at the flailing creature.


    "You are going to leave him to me?" - My thoughts were rather direct, I''ve left the hostage for them to take away.. why the hell were they just throwing one of their own like that? The elder toad made a gesture that I didn''t understand, pal going from the heart up the throat, and as it opened its mouth - the finger unfolded, reaching for the sky. It then finally walked away, reaching the spear-men. Their group didn''t say a word, leaving the scene in complete silence. I was surprised, and to be honest I still didn''t understand their reasons, as the gesture was far too ... well obscure..


    "That can mean anything!!.. the soul leaving the body? Reuniting with your ancestors in the tree of life.. What??" - I looked away from the flailing creature.. I did what I wanted, and now.. I had to cope with the decision of the toads - which meant leaving the creature as it was.. to suffer and probably eaten by the tree-dwellers eventually.


    ...


    It was long past the afternoon when I reached my camp. I had this feeling of disgust towards myself after what I''ve done. Not so much due to killing the whole lot of creatures, not even for impaling their heads on the stakes - turning them into decorations, but for leaving that one creature to suffer.. the toad lost its mind, foaming from the mouth and rapidly breathing, I was sure that the blood-loss and injuries had pushed it to the point where it would have no chance of survival.. Still - it was something I''d rather forget, though - there was a slight reminder for me to look at.


    "There was no time before.. but damn.." - I looked at the headless, gutless pile of bodies lying a few meters away from the stream, being cooled down by the flowing water. With all the other things I had to do before setting off towards the toad village, I really had not that much time on my hands.. so the only thing I did was gut the toads and feed the pond..


    "That''s a lot of bodies.." - fourteen toad carcasses.. I moved towards the hut. - "I''ll need more than one knife"

 Chapter 21: The search begins

    Pitch black sun was reflecting in the watery surface of my unblinking eyes, constantly in motion, as if millions of dark tendrils moved in unison - mesmerizing and grand. My mind wasn''t questioning how the black star was really possible, why I could even see it, as darkness is nothing but the lack of light... but then.. why did the gray sky shine dimly? Nothing of that mattered, only the feeling of dread and helplessness I''ve felt for the last few hours did. Standing alone in an empty space, all around for miles and miles - were only the infinite, charred flat plains. They looked as if someone had set the land ablaze, leaving the slightly smoking barren lands behind - no life, not even a sign of any remains. No bodies, no structures - everything was covered in black charred velvet.. There was no heat, there was no wind - tiny specks of black dust floated close to the surface of the ground, seems like even my existence already disturbed this place.


    It wasn''t, however, the sight that caused me to feel dread and helplessness, but the feeling - the sounds. Everything was resonating right within my brain - the sun, roaring like a thousand beasts, was echoing inside my skull, tearing it apart. It didn''t stop even for one second, it didn''t get any less loud... I heard a similar sound before, but it was miniscule in comparison, the whispers - that was the same sound... Instead of the constant whispering, it was an ominously deafening roar.. it was constant, unchanging - I''ve grown used to it this time... Yes, this time as in not the first time I''ve been here. As I remembered this fact, the darkness shifted, blinding me.


    "This dream again" - I slowly opened my eyes, looking at the ceiling of my hut. The thatch roof seemed murky as my eyes were getting awake as slow as the rest of me.. My whole body was covered in cold sweat, and a slight headache persisted, which wasn''t anything new.. For the last three days, I''ve been visited by the same dream over and over again, by the same black scenery. Despite any explanation I''ve been trying to come up with, or persuade myself to believe, right now it was just a bad dream - even if the aftertaste was the slight feeling of fear. Part of the blame attributed to the cracked skull from the fight - which bothered me only the first day.. and maybe will bother me again, as the scarred spot would leave a bald line in my great mane of hair..or maybe not now that I think about it..


    The other culprit which I''ve blamed for the headaches, was the fact that I''ve been cutting down the amount of pur-map I''ve been taking, as I''ve noticed that the inside of my lower lip being covered in tiny wounds.


    I didn''t panic when I felt the tiny cracks in the smooth surface, same things happen when you go a bit too hard on chewing tobacco, or when you use snus too often. It''s just the rather harmless chemicals slowly dissolving the thin membrane protecting your body - sounds worse than it is in reality.


    I stretched - trying not to knock anything in the tiny space of my living quarters, my spine cracked a bit, sending the tiny speck of pleasure in a echoing wave across my back. My eyes were already half open, and my mind half awake - which was good enough to be honest. The green surface of a paper-leaf bedding rustled under the movements and my shifting weight, as my feet found their way to the ground and sat the rest of my body up. Even despite the rather shitty dreams I''ve been having for the last three or so days, I''ve been well rested. The three hours of sleep - blessing for a tired body.


    Speaking of body.. The attack of the cl.. the attack of the toads was almost four days ago. It was quiet enough, no signs of any approaching creatures, so I''ve decided to stop being paranoid and start sleeping in my bed once more. Which was important to do, as sleeping outside in some bushes - well.. I doubt it would help my wounds fully heal. After I washed my body thoroughly and looked at all the wounds I''ve suffered - I felt a bit happy. No, don''t get me wrong - I wasn''t happy that I''ve been torn to shreds once again, not into M stuff.. much.. but happy for surviving it and being able to walk. The wounds were starting to heal - even without the aid of paper-leaf they would heal eventually - though would surely add to my collection of scars. Even now - the dark crust, which painted me into a two legged zebra, was being surrounded by dozens of long white lines, some dragging over the skin, as if someone drew them with a thick layer of paint.


    The wound on my side, which I''ve covered with paper-leaf - was the same, on the exception of the light jellylike webbing covering it, stitching the skin together. Yesterday, I''ve had an unpleasant experience of pulling the tiny shards of bone out of it. They came out with a bit of pus, which was unexpected - as before I went to sleep that night, I haven''t felt any pieces in there, not even any sign of infection.


    So overall, I''ve had enough time for the wounds to heal. That doesn''t mean that I''ve been resting for the last few days, I''ve just limited my activities to the nearby area to my hut, as well as slightly shorter practice with the spear and a bit of stretching. Even with the whole being hurt business, I couldn''t allow my body to stiffen from the lack of movement...and it had nothing to do with being bored out of my mind from lying in bed..starting at the ceiling.


    "Good morning Eduardo. Good job guarding my sleeping ass.. " - I shifted my gaze, while forcing my mouth shut from a mighty yawn. The dummy was propped against the wall, wearing something bizarre looking.


    Three days ago, I''ve been busy skinning the toads, and Eduardo was wearing one of the attempts at making clothes... A failed attempt though, as the two skins that I''ve stitched together over the dummy have dried to a crisp.. literally, I couldn''t remove the shirt without breaking a piece of it off.. Good thing that I decided to drop the rest into the pond, hoping that the same thing that happened to the paper-leaves... of course I''ve surrounded the area I was using with a "fence" of sorts.


    Recalling the events of the past few days. A whole lot of skinning of the toads was going on. Their hides really came off rather easily, I could say the feeling was the same as taking a glove off a hand covered in honey - left in a warm place to dry for three or so hours.. and the glove was covered in a bit of oil. Nasty stuff, but I really didn''t want to waste the materials, even if the creatures seemed to be intelligent.


    Now there was a whole lot of moral outrage flaring up inside my head as I was about to do the skinning. For one - the creatures were rather smart, which already posed a dilemma.. should they be considered the same as human? I mean, I''ve let the children go... but now there I was, cutting into the skin of their supposed parents, uncles or whatever and dragging the hide off of their flesh. The other part of me, the one which was struggling with lack of resources and hunger, was thinking something akin to: "..fuck you and your morals! Waste the fucking materials and I will end your white ass!"


    With me being threatened by myself, I went on with the plan to use everything to the fullest. This way I could say that it wasn''t my greed talking, but the thought that the death of the creatures wasn''t for nothing. Besides the fact that I killed them to live - so what I''d do with their bodies was up to me.


    Oh and speaking of not wasting anything..


    I''ve stood up, bumping my head on the drying piece of meat, it left a purple spot on my forehead. Yes, I''ve decided to butcher the toads and use them up for food. That''s the second outrage - eating a sentient being, but people do that either way, so the outrage was just a tiny "ew".


    However, over a dozen carcasses was too large of a source of food to simply let it go to waste. Ok, I''ve eaten frog legs, and the meat was soft and a bit fatty, so - that was the temptation already.


    Toader meat cooked over an open fire was great... I tried a little bit of it to make sure it wasn''t poisonous, and ended up cooking half the body... I''d wish to say that it tasted like chicken, or pork, but it didn''t - being completely different in both texture and taste. I''ll just say it was good, so good that I didn''t want it to go to waste whatever the cost.


    The cost was- turning the whole hut into one big smoker, leaving enough fresh air not to suffocate when I''m sleeping.. so everything above the bed was covered in a shifting cloud of thin smoke. I felt the layer of damp purple paste on the surface of the pieces of ham I had drying... "ham" - being the upper portion of the toad leg, which was thick as all hell and dark.


    "I shouldn''t let the top layer dry up too fast I guess.." - A little dampness was good, though I wasn''t that knowledgeable on the art of smoking meat, but as far as I knew, when curing meat - if the top layer becomes too dry too fast, the moisture won''t be able to escape the meat and it would spoil... Then again, I was curing around six "hams" with no salt or anything... more of an experiment, unlike the rather thin slices of meat that were hanging all over the top of the hut like Christmas decorations..


    Jerky is rather easy compared to ham, or whatever the hell I was making.. Some cultures were known to simply let the thinly sliced meat dry in the shade during a hot day - not using any salt, or protecting the meat from insects.. So I was sure of success in regards to the tonnes of jerky I''ve had smoking. And no, I wasn''t using pur-map as a source of smoke, I used some wood from random bushes.


    Even despite all my efforts to keep all of the meat, there was a tad bit too much of it. I''ve made broth from the bones and meat, which I''ve left in the clay pots with lids right in the middle of the stream. It was cold enough to let the broth turn into jelly, so for at least three to four days - I could leave it as is, without the slightest fear of it spoiling. Oh, did I mention toad bacon? No, because the fat on them was lacking, and there was nothing like bacon on them.. despite the round figure, the toads weren''t fat..The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.


    My whole hut started to look like a stockpile on top of a stockpile.. a warehouse full of food. Paper-leaf stems tied into bundles and hanging from the walls or standing in baskets, getting soft enough to eat - everywhere you looked was food. The only thing left would be finding an edible breed of mushrooms... It''s hard to let things go in these circumstances.


    I ducked and left the warm embrace of my smokehouse, getting a nice breath of fresh air. I looked around, the frames with the skins stretched over them were positioned in one place, making sort of a wall in front of my hut. The skins were drying - after being soaked in the plant-juice pond for a few days. As I thought - it really had the similar effect on the rubbery hides as on the leaves of paper-leaf. The toads skin didn''t dissolve in the stomach juices of the plant after nearly three days of soaking.


    I touched the surface of the stretched skins - they actually felt a bit rubbery to the touch - flexible, but hard enough at the same time. Thirteen frames littered the outside of my hut, letting out a bit of a fishy smell. The deer skin which I could have easily forgotten, shared the same fate as the ones of the toads.. it seemed to be a bit rougher to the touch though, and considering the fact that it had a whole bunch of holes in it from me failing to skin it properly, was looking chewed up.


    Yes, training to skin something tends to have a toll on the resources - so the deer skin could only be used for making some belts, or laces..


    Usually tanning would take a few months to do, or something like that, but I wasn''t in the normal world... One look at the drying skins that looked properly tanned proved that.. so with the new materials and a whole pond of quick-tanning carnivorous plant stomach-juice... holy shit I am bad at naming stuff.. I''ve been able to speed things quite a bit. Three days accounted to a few months of waiting time and hard work.. all because of the simple man-eating pond. Still- the toad skins would hang to dry until tomorrow, and I will get ready to set out in the mean time - I had to be ready for anything.


    I was going to set out to find where the human came from, and as I decided.. I wouldn''t be coming back until I find out. As I was washing my face in the cool water from the spring, taking a few sips, I looked over the mark on my hand.


    "I really want some answers.." - A cold splash of water made me lose my breath for a slight second, then I threw another one at myself.


    ....


    "DICKFUCK!" - I looked at my left index finger that had a large bead of blood forming on the inside of it. I sucked on the finger, feeling the coppery taste of my own blood. Sewing toad skin was harder than you can imagine. For one - it was actually hard to pierce with a wooden spike, even a bone needle was having trouble penetrating it.. and I had to stitch it for a while now.. So my left hand looked like it was sick with chicken-pox... red spots all over the fingers.


    "The worst part ... I''ll probably have to do all of this all over again.." - I looked at the half-made pants in my hands, as well as at the large piece of stitched together toad skin.


    "OH sure! I''ll be super smart and use sinew from the fucking toads as string!" - I verified that the finger had no more blood pouring out and continued the painful task of sewing the smelly hides together, occasionally piercing my fingers.


    "The sinew will shrink when dry and hold the leather together! SO SMART!" - I was whining, but continued to sew.


    "Really.. finishing the shirt, then half the pants.. and then getting that the sinew will get loose if I wet it.. and the clothes will fall apart.." - I took the stone knife and started popping holes close to the stitches I''ve just made. - "So instead of doing everything once.. I''ll fucking have to make holes and stitch everything in place with leather laces.. amazing efficiency."


    That was the day I''ve decided to make clothes.. and for that task I''ve decided to allocate my full attention, skipping lunch, training and any other activity I''ve had scheduled. I was going to make these clothes even if it would be the last thing I do.


    ....


    I stood looming over the result of my agony and suffering. The real set of clothes I''ve had made..


    "Well.. they don''t look that ba.." - I couldn''t stop myself from laughing out loud, striking my face with my palm, making a loud slapping noise. - "..phahah.. they''re fucking horrible.."


    I really can''t tell what was worse between the "pants" and the "shirt". They were rough and a bit crooked, but that was just on the first glance.. The pants were too wide in the waist area, so when I wore them, I''d firstly have to use a belt, but that was just the beginning.. The pants looked like a diaper, hanging in the crotch and the ass.. while getting exponentially narrower.. to the point that I had to cut the leather a bit, just to get my foot through... If that was not enough.. the pants were basically just longer version of shorts, covering only a half of my shin.


    "Well my junk will be having a whole lot of space," - I laughed just imagining how this atrocity of dark leather would look to someone else...


    As for the shirt... Well - I had some troubles making the sleeves out of leather, rather I''ve fucked it up and made the opening for the sleeves too narrow.. to the point that the sleeves had to go. Sleeveless shirt which got so crooked, that on the left side it was going halfway to my knee, but the right side of my stomach and ribs were completely exposed.. DON''T even ask how I was able to fuck up that bad..just no. And that''s all besides the giant stitches that make the clothes look like they were made in the same way as the monster of Frankenstein.. Did I mention that they were dark gray after being washed and boiled in pur-map? I was already grateful for them not coming out purple.


    To somehow cover the exposed area, I''ve stitched a huge patch of dark green paper-leaf to the side, evening the shirt out. At this point I was one step from sewing the pants to the shirt to make a onesie, just for the laughs. On the bright side, and to my astonishment - the paper-leaf leaves turned black after being boiled in pur-map along with the leather... the more you know...


    "My god.." - I''ve finally had clothes. - "I was so preoccupied with whether I could.. that I didn''t stop to think if I should.."


    "Well, whatever" - The whole clothes situation was a slight relief for me, letting out a few laughs and making fun of my own failures - when else than then. It was the first fuck-up that didn''t end up almost killing me.


    I didn''t care what I looked like, the clothes were functional, and I was able to say goodbye to the sack-shorts. Leaving them by Eduardo as a reminder. Reminder of what? Like fuck I know, it just seemed appropriate.


    Still, with the sturdy clothes covering at least some parts of my body, I was actually ready to set out. I tightly wrapped my arms and hands up to my shoulders in black paper-leaf bandages, making sure I could still move rather freely. I tied the leather belt around the new pants and secured it with a piece of bone and a little string, putting the bone through the noose in the leather and tying both ends of it with leather string. The belt was thick and wide, with a few loops tied through it, to which I attached the stone celt ax, a few knives and two sacks I''ve made from the sleeves that I''ve cut off, these were filled with some of the jerky and paper-leaf stems. The last thing I''ve had with me, was a cylinder made from fired clay, with a wooden cork in it.. that was more of a test run for the crude flask.. It didn''t hold much water to be honest, and could easily break.. I had to think of a way to make a good one - but for now, that was what I''ve had..


    After smearing my face, neck and exposed skin with the black pur-map paste, I went into the hut to get the paper-leaf poncho, which I''ve repaired, and a set of stone-tipped spears - totaling to eight pieces. On my wrist, as usual, an atatl was dangling - I really was inseparable from a weapon at any given moment. Since the journey could go for a while, I had a short dinner - finishing the jelly like broth from toad meat and having a few pieces of jerky, which was dry enough to keep on hanging for a few weeks if I was going to be gone for that long..


    Leaving my base of operations, I''ve made my way to the only place where I could go in order to find the answers regarding the human.. damn.. that was the least favorite part..


    ....


    Silently creeping through the dark green covers of the bushes, even despite the gear I was carrying, I''ve made my way through the forest. I already remembered the route and could have navigated through the forest to the spot even during the night. Despite that, I decided to set off early in the morning - to have as much sunlight as possible. I didn''t go directly to the spot, but circled it from the side. Just a small precaution to be honest.


    If it weren''t for me almost striking the empty wooden spike with my hand, I would''ve missed the spot. I couldn''t believe my eyes, as what was before me, wasn''t the same gruesome scenery I''ve left behind almost a week ago.


    "Why so much paper-leaf?"- The plants were literally everywhere the eye could see, a whole fifteen square meter patch of white paper-leaf spreading through the dark green covers of moss. It was bizarre - and after blankly staring for a few moments, I''ve made my way through. I really had to be sure that it was the same spot.


    "Maybe someone else set more spikes elsewhere?" - That couldn''t have been the case, but I was still hesitant to believe that the place got fully overgrown with paper-leaf all of a sudden, as it was an empty opening covered in moss.. What I''ve seen made me recognize the place, and send a chill down my spine, as realization slowly crept from my toes up to my brain.


    "..." - I was speechless as I stood before a tree and eyed the one-legged corpse before me.. If that thing could be considered a corpse. The gray, warty skin - that showed signs of decomposition was stretched over something that looked like a bundle of wires. It was like a frame that resembled some creepy statue made by Giger, rather than what it was originally.. but the body itself, despite looking horrendous, wasn''t what made me shiver. It was the thick paper-leaf stems - protruding from the eyes and the mouth of the creature, as well as the nostrils and the ears. Wherever the skin looked like it ripped - I could see black, dried spirals - stitching it together.


    "..." - My mind was blank as I walked closer, stretching my arm to brush against the leaves and the stem of the plant with my fingers. It left a spot of whitish dust on my fingers.. It didn''t take me long to figure out that, as there was no flower, this wasn''t pollen.. Paperleaf wasn''t a plant - but a mushroom.. or a fungus of some sort.


    Pictures of insects with mushrooms growing out of their carcasses loomed in my mind, striking pure horror into my mind. That was me who applied the paper-leaf to the injured toad, I did this.. but... My spine felt ice-cold.


    "I''ve been using it.. b.." - even in my mind I was stuttering as I looked, first at the fungus infested corpse, then the whole area overgrown by the paper-leaf. My hands were shaking as I was about to throw up, but somehow I was still holding it in, while my mind kept racing. I was moments from falling into complete panic, but the loud croak in the distance made me abandon that and jump in alert - turining around. Behind the trees I could see a toad with a spear, watching me from behind the trees. Someone was running into the distance, my mind however - was still preoccupied with what I''ve just witnessed.

 Chapter 22: Half-assed answers

    I''ve still felt the chill on my spine, as if someone spilled a whole bucket load of ice cold water on me .. My eyes were shifting around, trying to comprehend what happened, the reasons, but it all still came to the same conclusion. I''ve been responsible for this.


    "The largest stem goes out from the ...body.. of the deceased toad.." - My thoughts were hesitant, this whole situation wasn''t easy to swallow, and even harder to digest. Nevertheless - puzzles aren''t that hard when you pay attention to details.


    "Considering that the plant is paper-leaf, there''s no doubts that it was because of me covering it''s wounds with fresh leaves.." - I crouched on the ground, squatting as my fingers touched the area where the original bandages of the paper-leaf were put on, there was no spores, unlike the large plant.. or rather fungal growth protruding from the corpse.


    "Normal paper-leaf never had any spores on it.." - to confirm my thought, I''ve studied one of the leaves of the plant growing from the darkened moss. - "And considering that I''ve been using green paper-leaf to tend to the wounds of little toads.."


    I''ve paused, thinking about what has been going on back then. - "They didn''t show any signs of being in pain... unlike this fellow.."


    Yes, now the sudden screaming and agonizing pain made a whole lot more sense, even though I was excluding myself from the equation. Right now I was focused on the fungus before me, and what I knew of its behavior so far.


    "I''ve wrapped the dead body of a little toad with paper-leaf.. the tribe took him back in without any hesitation... still - that''s an unknown variable.."


    I glanced up at the area where toads were coming from, but there was no-one there but the watch-toad. I still had time to think and calm myself down.


    "One plant with spores, multiple growing in a limited area around it.." - I took a deep breath and studied the "field" where the paper-leaf bloomed, the only difference with the surrounding forest was my spike and head fence.


    "Fuck.." - I brushed the back of my head.


    "Paperleaf reacts to blood - that much is known for sure.. The patch doesn''t go much further than the last impaled head.. so it must use it to grow. Considering the state of the corpse.. and the fact that the impaled heads didn''t turn out the same.. the spore bearing stem must use a lot of nutrients - and uses the living creature to grow.. So the fungus stops any excessive bleeding - not to waste any food... then the whole screaming shenanigans go on.. feeling a fungus spreading and eating you must be painful.."


    I''ve brushed my eyes, reorganizing the thoughts inside of my head.


    "Then there''s me... I''ve used paper-leaf a lot - and there doesn''t seem to be much pain at all. Of course the fungus might grow only inside the toads or something. Like the zombie fungus that affects only a certain species of insect - one fungus for one species... But it wouldn''t heal the wound if that was the case, would it?" - My fingers ran across the soft scar tissue on my left arm, the lack of fingers there was quite bizarre to the touch.


    "So there must be something that makes me different from the toad.. no- from a normal host. Why my blood is not good enough for the fungus to continue growing.. It''s not my immune system for sure, chemo has made sure it was shred to shit.. Is that it?"


    I''ve sliced my palm on the sharp stone tip of the spear, making a bit of blood pour out of the wound. A few moments later my fingers simply brushed the remaining blood off, leaving only a thin reddish line. The bleeding stopped quite fast, making me frown - it wasn''t normal that blood stopped that fast no matter what.


    "But if I''m poisonous to the fungus, it would already die off.. or if I was still suitable.. then it would have started growing shouldn''t it? So I''m not the perfect host or what?" - The fungus wasn''t growing, but was still in the healing stage.. there was something I was missing really. But one thing was for certain - I was alive and better than well - meaning that all of this, I should simply put in the back shelf of my mind. Besides, this right in front of me wasn''t what I came here for.


    ...


    My eyes were staring blankly at the half rotten head with an exposed skull, which was really an overstatement, as there was not much head there.. the rotten flesh was eaten up by the moss or whatever insects that I haven''t seen yet, leaving some sticky goop on the bone - can''t call this flesh really. On the bright side there was not much of a smell to it, not enough to make you gag, just disgusting smell of vomit mixed with some spoiled meat.


    The elder toad was looking at me with slight worry on it''s face for the last few minutes. Seems like they''ve really set up watch in this area in case I came back.. And the one that was going to interact with me was the tribe chief, really - any toad would do. Whatever, toads feared me, mission accomplished and now I could use the fear to get answers. Problem was- the lack of dictionary.


    "Crack?" - A younger toad with the spear spoke to the elder, only to get slapped on the back of its skull by an older spear-toad. Their faces had some fear painted across them, surely they didn''t want to be here, especially this close to me - closer than before, as I was four fifths of the way from the paper-leaf patch to the place they stood at. I wondered if they could tell what my clothes were made of.. probably not, as most of them were covered by the green poncho. It seemed like my silence was rather long, in reality I was trying to figure out what I should do or say.. or what noises to make..Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.


    "Shit..." - I''ve felt my fingers bury into the soft goop inside of the eye-sockets, as my palm touched the sticky nearly jelly-like substance on the surface of the skull. I threw the head towards the feet of the elder. It rolled on the moss, stopping only as it bumped into his foot.


    It looked up at me dumbfounded, like - "yes, its a skull..so?"


    I pointed at myself with a thumb, then into the approximate area where my base was located, then I pointed at the elder and the location their village should be located, that''s when all the three toads got a bit tense. Last I''ve pointed at the skull at their feet.. They waited expecting me to continue, but I''ve also waited - my eyes fixed on them, glaring rather than staring. Took the toads some time to figure things out and get the message.


    "Croekcraararark" - The awkward silence was broken by the elder toad, who pointed at the older spear-toad, obviously ordering him something that he didn''t like, all the croaks full of dissatisfaction were stopped by a raised hand of the elder. The face of the young one was full of relief, he looked sympathetically at his spear bearing comrade.


    "I guess that''s my guide" - I''ve straightened myself, holding the spear on the ready - just in case. The fact the toads were ready to help me, was in no regard a reason to let my guard down. Nothing was, everything was an enemy. Still I was already happy - I was going to find out where the human has come from, that could mean there was some settlement nearby or something.


    ...


    The toad kept throwing wary glances at me for the first twenty minutes we were walking, but as my face didn''t show much, and I could have obviously attacked on a multitude of occasions.. including two times the toad tripped while looking back at me, it calmed down and kept going through the forest. I could still quite easily navigate back to my place from here, so I wasn''t that much worried. There was no-one following us as far as I could tell, and there was no obvious traps in front of me as I followed the spear-toad step by step.


    I was anxious to say the least. Coming face to face with a fantasy-like world due to some crazy teleportation was one thing, but getting back to humanity after this much time alone in the forest.. it seemed life-changing. However the toad stopped in front of a hill surrounded by bushed - a steep hill that probably had a climbable slope on the other side.


    "Croak!" - It pointed at the bushes and started shuffling sideways, glancing at me. I was pissed.. I expected a road, anything really.. anything but a fucking hill with bushes. I waved my hand in annoyance at the toad. Not even a second later I was alone with the new discovery.


    I''ve crossed the remaining distance and made my way through the bushes, noting some half-broken branches hanging off the healthy stems. As I stepped out of them, before me was a big hole. I would be happy to call it a cave, a giant gaping black hole with millions of wonders inside, but it was really a simple man-sized hole obviously dug by humans.. as I stepped closer, I felt something below the moss creak.. The rotten wood probably belonged to the door..


    "Well that''s fucking disappointing.." - I stepped inside the narrow space, still hoping that it was a tunnel to a city.


    ...


    It took me only ten minutes to scan the hole fully, mainly due to it''s size. Not even going to make any comments on that other than it was underwhelming. Roughly dug out walls supported by some already rotting wood. The whole thing felt unfinished, hastily made and abandoned. There was no doubt that the human from the first day had come from here... the problem was- why.. Why would someone dig a hole inside a hill in the middle of nowhere?


    I wish I didn''t find the answer for that.. among a few moldy and half-rotten sleeping bags, I''ve found one covered in remains of human- a skull and a hand, as well as another set casually lying on the ground. That wouldn''t tell me much about the people that died by the hand of toaders, but some things that were left along with the limbs did.


    "I guess that''s what happens when you let art face the elements.." - I sat cross-legged in front of a darkened wooden frame, which held some sort of fabric - which looked like colored tatters right now. Really easy to guess what it was some time ago.


    "A painting..." - I looked at the broken pieces of stone on the ground - some were shaped like humans.. once again a piece of art..


    "Sculptures..." - I even found a few copper coins in the ground after bushing by fingers through it.. - "Money.."


    Considering that the place seemed to be in a haphazard state, with most of the paintings thrown around like someone was searching through the place hastily. The lack of any tools, as well as some glass shards littering the floor.. I came to a few conclusions.


    "For one.. you guys..."- I slapped the half-decomposed skull, making a disgusting splashing noise and covering my hand in the smelly slime once again.. - "..were thieves.... who had a shitty stash in the woods.. I guess you had some valuables hidden here for some reason.."


    I sat there, petting the skull laying close to me.


    " ..But the toads took all they could find.. after killing you that is.. except for those coins they dropped... and paintings.. and sculptures... oh - and one horseshoe!" - Why would the toads need art either way? Why would they need money and tools?


    "The answer is rather easy..." - I was annoyed, angry, dissatisfied.. My arm threw the rotten head into a support beam, making a bit of dirt fall from the ceiling.


    "They like shiny stuff..." - I stared downwards. My hopes of finding civilization shattered. This was a stash, poorly made one at that... which would be dubious if there would be a city anywhere close. So what that meant for me? Well.. nothing new. I was alone in a forest, with no obvious way of telling a way out of this place.


    "You most likely used this as a halfway point between hideouts, yes?" - the skull was staring at me mockingly, vile slime dripping down its left eye-socket.


    "... and now.. all of your shiny stuff is at the toad village... and they don''t use your weapons, which you surely had somewhere... of course.. it''s shiny, precious loot."


    I stood up, readjusted the spears tied to my back and moved out of the hole. There was nothing worth looting in here, nothing of use to me. I guess I was the same as the toads, only with a slightly different criteria, regardless - the scraps of art were useless to say the least. I made my way home, gloom and rather angry.. I''ve had my answers, but they weren''t worth neither the effort, nor the risk.


    ...


    That evening, I''ve broken a dozen of training spears trying to vent by training..

 Chapter 23: Groundbreaking changes

    For the first day after the discovery of the hole in the hill and its origins, I was angry. During the second day, I''ve been depressed and fear of dying from the fungal infection persisted, despite that - eventually I''ve calmed down.. I''ve been good with accepting my own mortality, not like that was the first time..


    The third day - was when I returned to normal routine. Gathering, crafting, hoarding and hunting. Meat I''ve dried and cured, ended up being a success, even without any salt or anything. It didn''t taste particularly good, but now - I''ve been in possession of a reserve of food, which could last me some time in case of emergency.


    Another week passed as I was consumed by the alternating tasks, dreams of black world and training. I accepted the situation, really - there was no point to try to deny it. I was ok with living like this.


    ....


    "The little ones are growing quite fast"- I was watching the herd of the deer-like animals for the past two days, and hunting wasn''t the only reason. It was relaxing to say the least, these animals seemed so alert, yet so calm at the same time. I wanted to learn more about them, but for now the only thing I could see- was two of them mating. Yep, apparently they couldn''t find any better time to do the deed, making me look like some pervert.


    "Really.. animals.. no sense of shame" - I laughed silently, until I''ve felt like something was coming up.. And no, not funny. It was as similar to the feeling when you are about to throw up, but my stomach was just fine. I felt my heartbeat skyrocket in an instant, but what was important - I wasn''t the only one who was affected.. The deers straightened their heads as if listening to something, even the mating stopped as they looked around - panic in their beady eyes.


    "Just.." - I couldn''t even think of anything, as suddenly a deafening roar popped inside of my head. I knew that - it was the whispering, or the roaring from the dream.. but this time it was in reality, it roared somewhere deep down - inside the earth. Roared and made my whole consciousness feel like a tiny stone being pulled in by a giant planet... It was pulling on me, or rather I felt the urge to jump straight down, diving head first into the moss.. I was able to resist, but my vision was blurry and darkened, tunneled.. I felt my grip loosen, making me slip down the tree, as my leg lost footing. Bark scraped on my face, but I''ve been able to hold on..until the ground shook violently.


    My hands strained as I felt the tree wave around, creaking.. the ground was rumbling like mad, and it got louder and louder until the earth started breaking up and moving as if it was alive. Trees were breaking and flailing violently, I''ve heard yelps of the deers that failed to remain standing or got hit by a branch. I couldn''t keep holding to the tree and was sent flying, the landing was not soft in the slightest. The air was knocked out of my lungs so violently, that I could feel something ripping inside. Even on the ground, I wasn''t simply lying, but tossed into the air - two or three meters high.. every few seconds.Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.


    My eyes were seeing everything in a blur, moving - flying around.. trees, stones, animals - everything was a mess.. I could swear that I''ve caught a glance of the tops of the pine trees for a brief moment.. that was - until my vision darkened from the power of another strike.. I''ve lost consciousness..


    ...


    "Still alive?" - I doubted my own condition as I could feel my own breathing, hesitant to open my eyelids. In the end, despite feeling battered up and bruised, I was quite fine. I tried to roll to my side while opening my eyes, but the feeling of emptiness where the ground should have been made my eyes pop open.


    The ground was somewhere thirty meters below, quite a long fall to be honest. I grasped the dirt, moss and stones trying to pull myself back and move away from the edge. I felt solid ground behind me, as I shook my head violently - trying to see where I was going, as my feet and arms scraped on the surface of the ground to get back to safety. My heart raced as I faced the results of the mighty quake that I''ve survived. Before me wasn''t the scenery that I''ve lived the past months in, giant cracks in the ground, looking like gaping mouths of giant beasts were lining the land before me. Small hills that I''ve seen before were no more, substituted with giant, pillar-like mountains of different sizes, but most importantly - there was it. IT was impossible to miss, as it could be called a center piece of this whole disaster.


    Looming over the smaller pillars, mighty and grand column of jagged mountains and raised earth - hundreds of meters high. It didn''t look like something made by nature, nor by man.. it was as if some deity grabbed the mountains and the plains and built a sandcastle using a bucket.. I felt like an ant in comparison.


    ...


    It took me a while to finally calm down and start using my head, by looking around myself closer. I was located at the face of the cliff - on a ledge a few meters wide and ten to fourteen long. It was mostly ground and rocks, but occasionally I could see the roots of the trees protrude from the cliff - looking like unmoving tentacles. I didn''t see the top of the cliff to be honest, but as far as I knew - there was another ledge around five meters above.


    "Going down is out of the question.." - Without tools and rope, going down the steep cliff was the same as jumping from an airplane without a parachute.. and there would be no safety net to catch me. - "... my stuff is lost too."


    Seems like all that being thrown around during the earthquake made me lose my atatl, spear, leaving me with only a stone knife, that was still tightly tied to my belt. That wasn''t much, but it was something right? Lets just say the knife made me a bit more confident, as I looked at the dangling roots of the tree - trying to decide if it was worth the shot..

 Chapter 24: New terrain

    Stones and pieces of clumped dirt fell from the dangling roots, rushing down the cliff-side - causing even more earth and rocks to join them in the journey downwards. The small landslide was caused by a rushed movement above, my own movement as I clung to the slippery roots of a pine tree. At first I thought that climbing five meters up the cliff was an easy task, that the roots would provide decent support and assist me, making it trivial. Oh, I''d regret that, more so.. already did.


    "..fff..." - My mind didn''t have the strength to mumble curses as I looked down - seeing the land so far below me. My head spun at the sight, causing me to nearly slip and fall. It''s not without reason every time people climb grand heights in movies, the same line seems to pop up every time: "Don''t look down.". How would I not look? After two or so meters, nearly halfway up, I''ve felt the root I''ve clung to vibrate.. as if it was... ripping. The fall would surely kill me, though I WOULD get down rather fast...


    Not even a second later my whole body sprung into action, as an arrow released from a bow. I flung myself towards the next bundle of roots, gripping them so hard - my fingers seemed to crack. A root broke down and fell, only to get stuck in the tendrils a few meters below.. Rocks fell down, drumming down the cliff. I was safe... but I looked down, following the sound of stones and earth crashing into the ground.. I couldn''t even make them out in this distance..Indeed I was safe..


    The issue here was.. the roots I''ve held to... Were dangling right above the steep drop.. no ground to climb down to, no turning back - as there were no more thick enough natural "ropes" that could possibly support my own weight. Instead of getting up, I had ended up going even further down.. So there I was, dangling from the cliff, clinging to the roots of a tree surrounded by large clumps of dirt, looking like a bunch of potatoes plucked fresh from the ground.. Hesitant to move, hesitant to blink, to breathe and move even a muscle.. I was beneath the ledge I''ve woken up on.. now the edge of the cliff seemed even further away.


    A minute passed, then another.. eventually I''ve felt my muscles hurt a bit.. There was no way other than up.. so I started climbing, feeling sweat dripping down my neck. Every movement made my whole body flare in pain.. the earthquake had more of an impact on my body than I thought at first. From the dirt and dried blood, I couldn''t tell that I was covered in humongous bruises all over... more bruised flesh than unbruised.. Now though, the pain notified me on my condition, but gritting my teeth I moved up... little by little... until my palm pressed upon the flat ground.. pulling the tired aching body over the edge.. to safety... finally. Face down, I lied there breathing heavily - sand and dirt clinging to my dried lips. I didn''t care.. only pain kept me awake at this point, my head spun and I felt nauseous... seems like another concussion took place during the quake.


    ".. well.. in the grand scheme of things.. what is an another loose screw?" - I laughed like an idiot, dirt was blown away from the laughter, swirling away or sticking to my exposed teeth and gums. The whole situation was crazy.. this place was crazy.. seemed like I was finally going crazy as well.


    My thoughts replayed the quake over and over and over again, like a video on repeat - even if I tried to brush the thought away, it just kept coming back. The roaring inside my head was what sent shivers down my spine... the black sun.. was it real? Was it the cause of the earthquake? If so.. it was a power so great, it made my whole body numb.. it was immeasurable to someone like me...


    "So the dream is real or?" - I couldn''t help but wonder... if I was to think of rules of this world as you''d usually think about lore in a game where nothing is told directly, I would eventually come up with a decent theory.. But now.. HOW?? How could that place be real, it was but a dream.. a dream that followed me every night from the day..


    ".. no.. it didn''t start abruptly after the fight with the toaders... whispering - it was there before. It solidified, slowly.." - I''ve regained my breath and pushed myself up, spitting dirt out.. which was rather hard to do, as my throat was dry. I straightened up and looked into the sky, then around me..


    "How am I supposed to get back?" - The scenery was completely different... forget the gargantuan tower-mountain.. Craters, sinkholes and canyons littered everything in sight.. mountains covered a part of the view.. getting smaller the further from the "tower" they got..


    I touched the right side of my torso in hesitation, there was pain, but also something else. My stomach felt cold, the feeling of being pulled still fresh in my memory, it faded, but remained... a slight tug.. that felt like numb toothache. It was hard to ignore, but manageable..


    I sat down on the trunk of a felled tree, looking downwards onto my shadow. Under my feet, the ground was rough and uneven, moss littered the exposed ground in small patches here and there... completely different sight to the lush green forest.. chaotic land of ruin, somehow I thought this look was more appropriate for this harsh world.. My fingers slid across the rough edges of the bark, which was covered in dozens of cuts and scrapes. Even if I''d find my own marking on the tree, it would serve no purpose.. I''d not be able to tell the direction it originally pointed at.. there was something else that could at least somewhat help me with finding my way back.. the sun... though I didn''t know the time, I would be able to somewhat say if I was facing east or west. As the shadow passed a marking on the ground, I knew that my "home" was the opposite direction from the tower.. Even considering the fact that during the quake I was flung around, still I couldn''t have been thrown away too far.. A dozen meters or so wasn''t enough to completely shatter all hopes of finding a way back.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    ...


    The other side of the newly formed mountain wasn''t as steep, it was more of a slope.. nevertheless, getting through all the felled forest was rather time consuming, there was no straight path, no solid flat ground.... so before I knew it.. darkness already started setting in.. Despite the abundance of firewood.. to my own shame.. I wasn''t able to light even a small fire..


    As the darkness covered everything in sight, I stopped my attempts and sat, curled into a ball next to a failed campfire, with my back to the thick tree trunk. My eyes stared into the darkness, trying to travel during the night was akin to suicide.. even during daylight, just walking down the hillside was already hard enough.. In the dark - there was no telling where the next sinkhole, fissure or canyon would be..


    I struggled to keep myself awake, but eventually - my mind drifted and I was sound asleep.


    I was so exhausted and battered, that there were no dreams, only darkness... that''s what I wish would happen...however, despite all my hopes... it was there. The dream. The roaring darkness of a black sun and the barren lands around me. All the same as always. The sound didn''t bother me anymore, so I simply sat down and waited for it to end. There was no meaning in trying to walk through the plains, through the world of gray and black.. It had no end, it was consistent in that regard.. waling through it felt like walking on a treadmill, stuck in the same spot... I sat, resting... In the mean time, the only thing I could do is think and stare at my own arms, feet and take a good look at the condition of my body in this dream.


    "So I have a body... and I am naked." - I brushed my arms along my chest, all the scars were there... though the bruises weren''t.. it seemed a tiny bit too realistic to be.. well.. a dream. However I''d rather believe that it was a dream.. otherwise.. things were going to be strange. If it was real.. where was I? Why was I naked? Was it a parallel world? My own subconsciousness? Really, too confusing to understand and comprehend the situation. As a dream it was a lot easier to accept.


    "If this land is of any meaning.. Does the fact that it''s charred mean I''ve burned my life away? So the black sun might be the cause? My own fear or something? ... " - Looking for a meaning in a thing that could be meaningless, best way to kill time.. I was sitting in the middle of the endless black plains.. fiddling my thumbs and trying to come up with any symbolic meaning to the whole dream. For the moment the whole thing was rather edgy.. Blackness in a black black.. something for a fifteen-year old kid obsessed with.. emmm.. stuff..


    "This shit could have too many meanings... really nearly everything can be explained by it.." - I giggled at the stupidity of my attempts.


    "Charred lands ... my previously healthy body fucked up by the cancer.. ehh.. which is the black sun.. or considering it being cancer.. the chemo fucked me up to get rid of it.." - I frowned. - "Nah.. it''s still there, the black tentacle shit... and I''m completely fine.. I''ve seen my lungs a few.. months ago, they were rather.. um.. clean..."


    Somehow my own conclusion didn''t seem very... convincing. If there was a relapse in the time I was here, in this world.. well... I''d be fucked really..


    "Nah.. that''s just paranoia speaking.." - I tried to calm myself down, but the sound similar to a helicopter flying made me jump up.. It wasn''t the usual roaring, but I couldn''t see the source anywhere... The sound was completely out of place.. I turned around.. and suddenly all became dark.


    ...


    I popped my head up in surprise, the awakening from the dream was sudden. All around me was just darkness - the night was still young and I couldn''t even tell where my own arms were. Something was making this loud vibrating noise, moving into the distance. The direction was the same as I was going - though in the silence, I could tell that there wasn''t just one source of it.. there were many of them, echoing in the night. The sound wasn''t at all calming me down.. on the contrary - it made me nervous.. previously the forest was quiet... This.. was out of the ordinary..


    "Maybe it''s a good thing I didn''t make a fire..." - I reached in front of myself, fingers brushing through the nearby dirt, looking for a stick. It was there when I fell asleep. Finally I found it, a crooked branch - hard enough to serve as a club for a few swings at the very least.


    ...


    I''ve set out had the light only started to reveal the area previously shrouded by darkness. My stride wasn''t all that sure, as I hesitated to take each and every step. The area seemed completely unfamiliar, however I knew that I was going in the right direction. How, you might ask. Well.. now and then the felled trees would reveal the familiar markings on their bark. I''ve seen three for the last three hours... meaning that at least I wasn''t going in a completely wrong direction. Still - the terrain was a huge problem..


    "Damn.." - I looked down the edge of the long fissure in the ground.. As far as I could see- there was darkness in it.. not even a sign of a bottom to it.. It stretched far to both my right and left - like an immensely long scar.. the dark line wandered off into the distance.


    Then I stepped over it.


    "At this rate it might not take that long to get home.." - Despite the anticipation of returning to the hut, I had a bad feeling in my gut regarding the noise that I''ve heard this night...

 Chapter 25: Naively overlooked problematic encounter

    Clawing my way though the felled trees, bushes and other debris, I was steadily making my way to the base. At least, where I beileved it was located at.. I was rather fortunate that I didn''t have many hills and newly formed mountain ridges in the area. Despite looking destroyed, the road to my "camp" was situated in a valley between multiple mountain formations.


    "It really looks like the land was turned inside out.." - I climbed over a pile of dirt and stone, size of a small house.. I wasn''t able to ignore the smell of blood when I made it to the bottom.. crushed by rocks were a few carcasses of animals.. considering the talons it had - my guess would be that it was a tree-dweller. The poor lizard was crushed so bad, that the small piece of it''s leg was the only thing remaining of it... guts and blood were mixed with sand and dirt, making a crimson dried spot.


    "I guess you guys were hit the worst.. considering you live so high up.." - I poked the claw with the toe of my right foot a few times. A gush of fresh air blew the smell of iron away, brushing my face with the cool touch. It felt nice for once, but there was no time to enjoy such small things. Placing the piece of wood that served as my makeshift weapon at the moment, I took another step, carefully placing my foot - not to slice the sole open on another sharp piece of shattered stone.


    It was awkward to wander through the changed landscape - as some of the trees remained intact.. some areas seemed untouched- only slightly tilted, which was obvious by the angle of the trees - which were a bit slanted. Some were - on the other hand, utterly unrecognizable. Sharp stones lining the surface of the ground as sharp blades, line after line.. I tried to avoid dangerous terrain like that - one misstep and your head would be cut open like a cabbage.


    ...


    I was closing in on my house, it wasn''t just a wild guess though. Within the chunks and piles of dirt and stone, along the uprooted trees, I found pieces of rope lying around, along with spikes. My heart raced - I was indeed happy to see the destroyed traps.. even though it was a sad waste of resources and hard work.. they were signaling me.. like landing lights for a plane. Home was near. I rushed through the bushes that were residing on a slightly raised platform in front of me - these were the bushes I used for my atatl, my fingers gently brushed against the familiar plant before I dove right through it.


    "Shiieee..." - My voice rang out as I was barely able to grab a branch with my left hand, hanging with only my left foot on the ground.. the rest of my body was dangerously swinging above a steep crater in the ground.. My heart raced as I looked in front of me with mad eyes... The crater wasn''t that deep to be honest, still.. I didn''t enjoy the thought of dropping down nine meters.. onto jagged broken up stones.. I pulled myself back and stood straight. Cold sweat trickled down my spine, that was one clutch play on my part..


    "...that''s the pond?" - I looked at the crater, which was more of a sinkhole to be honest - twenty meters in diameter an uneven circular shape.. Water was dripping down one of the walls diagonally from the place I was standing.. like a small waterfall - though it wasn''t flowing over the top.. but right through the solid stone. A crack, no.. rather a tube was going through the rocks..


    I narrowed my eyes and tried to look into the distance over the crater - my arm still clenched the branch of the bush tightly. I could make out a smaller circle there.. and some reeds.. the fucking pond was still intact.. even after such a quake.


    "It was probably located on solid plate of really hard rock.."- I guessed.. similar to how some of the forest remained standing - the pond was still standing.. though there was no water in it, as the small stream of water flowing along the wall - well.. it WAS the ponds contents.


    Two questions popped into my head right away... one - was the pond creature still there.. the other - most important at the moment.. if the pond was there... Where was my hut? I looked around from the spot I stood at..


    Around sixty percent of the sinkhole was right at the spot where my base of operations was located... A painful feeling was going from my stomach and clumped right into my throat. It hurt to swallow, as if I had a knife stuck in my neck.. I saw the thatch.. I saw scattered wood.. Down below, along the stones and water.. at the bottom of the crater lay my home.. my blood and sweat wasted by the fucking quake.. everything destroyed.


    "So the last months.. were in vain?" - My body trembled from anger.. this wasn''t my fuck up.. but I''ve lost everything I''ve collected, everything I''ve hunted.. I was so naive to believe that my shabby hut would survive the quake powerful enough to lift whole mountains up.. - "Right! Maybe I can scavenge some of the supplies I had preparing, at least the meat can last me a day or two..."


    Agonizing seconds passed as I sat on the edge looking for meat down below... Something was off.. the hut was there, the bed was along the debris... but.. despite it all being littered along the ground... there was no meat. None. I''ve had nearly a months worth of stashed supplied drying.. but all I could see were the squashed paper-leaf stems.. still inside the basket I kept them in. All of the meat was gone... not even a random piece of jerky on the ground...The author''s content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.


    "Did the.. did the toads loot my camp while I was gone?" - My head dropped down, but a slight scraping sound made me look with widely opened eyes at the source. Slowly.. very slowly.. my body started to move away from the spot I stood at..


    "Nope.." - I gulped.. I really wished I didn''t get the answer for so many of my questions..


    "Nope! NOPE! NOPE!" - My shaking legs were shuffling away at the sight of a creature crawling out from the cracks.. It had a thick greenish tentacle clasped in its mandibles... pulling it out through the crack in the stone it got out of. Metallic black body had a slight greenishly blue hue to it.. Its four long limbs were tightly snagging to the stones, moving in rapid succession, so fast that I could hardly follow... and I followed.. my eyes filled with terror at the sight of the long slender body.


    "A giant nope.." - In my mind I was wimping... I wasn''t afraid of bugs.. but if a cockroach suddenly flies - you run like a bitch.. and at the sight of a wasp-like thing the size of a car... you get the fuck out crying like a little girl silently.. I did exactly so.. not turning and watching more of them getting out from some cracks in the ground.. it was a mystery how these giant bodies fit through these cracks, but I did not give a fuck at that time.


    "slowly.." - I backed away, back into the bushes.. until I couldn''t see the giant bugs any more..


    "Take the meat, take the resources, take the pond monster.." - I ran through the terrain like a madman, muttering to myself inside of my mind... I rushed full speed away from the creatures, to the right.. I sliced my foot on a sharp stone and pierced my toe with a piece of wood.. but I kept running like a madman.. The pond monster was either killed off, not getting away from the creatures, or was only snipped a bit.. at the time I wasn''t thinking about that..


    ...


    If I were to recall this moment - I was afraid and in utter panic. Though later I had the time to think about the whole ordeal with the quake and why the creatures were pulling pieces of Pondy from below. It all made perfect sense, the pond and the nearly circular tunnels dug through solid stone. I mean, if I knew what was coming I''d move away too, for slightly different reasons..


    ...


    I ran for a minute, for two.. I didn''t stop running after twenty minutes, nor after half an hour! My feet were bloody from all the cuts and piercing wounds! I ignored the pain as I ran up a mound of debris, and ignored it again as I rolled down it after slipping on a round piece of stone because of the blood! My lungs were on fire.. no.. fire didn''t hurt as much. The taste of metal spread through my mouth at every breath, but I couldn''t stop.. I ran fast past the tree covered by paper-leaf roots, crushed a nearly decomposed skull as I stepped on it.. feeling the bone shards sliding right into my sole. I ran until through my racing heart I heard the croaking screams and nearly crushed into a toader that jumped from behind a small pile of stones. We only hit shoulders, making us both lose balance and fall to the ground..


    "GHaah! HAAH.." - My breaths were more like wailing of a dying animal, and the toad looked at me with eyes full of panic as it shakingly scrambled and on all fours started to shuffle away, standing up and then running away.. Through my own heartbeat thundering in my eardrums, I heard the sound.. Datadadadadadda.. - it was like wheels of a train going full speed thumping on a slightly bumpy road. I felt a strong gush of wind when my hearing was deafened by the grand explosion of the moving wings.. The black figure zoomed right past me after the toad..


    "NO.." - that''s right.. there were more of the sounds during the night going in all directions.. I could feel the vibrations of the sound made by the flying creature.. and felt another vibration approaching from behind.. My fingers clenched a stone..


    I had little hope that the creature would ignore me and just zoom right past me.. just like the other one did.. so in a desperate attempt to save my life.. at the thought that I wouldn''t be able to run from that.. accompanied by the wailing sounds of a toad caught in the distance... I fought back.. I rotated my body and seeing the rapidly enlarging black spot, I''ve swung the stone at it. Crushing it right between the faceted eyes of its ugly wasp face.


    I could hear a loud crack.. but I didn''t know if it was the exoskeleton of the bug, or my own bones breaking and cracking... the only thing I understood.. was that standing in the way of a creature this big, moving at such speeds.. was fucking suicidal.. The hit of the truck seemed like a light bump, as air was hit right out of me when the huge slender body crashed into my own.. My feet couldn''t feel the ground below, as the momentum carried me along with the bug.. As we rolled through the ground I understood that the creature, even though the head was severed, was moving.. and what''s more.. it moved its lower body in a rather obvious motion. Screaming I stirred and whirled, trying to free myself from under the weight of its heavy body before it stung me. I felt my skin rip on the sharp spikes covering the limbs of the creature, but that was worth... all was worth if I could avoid the stinger..


    I was halfway out from under the bug, when it became a lot heavier.. so that I couldn''t move an inch... I saw the slightly tilting head of the wasp stare right at me as it stepped over the dead body of its kin.. The mandibles moved in a chewing motion and I could see the long antennae move in my direction.


    "Please.." - I could feel tears well up deep inside my head, my heart raced in panic. This was the end.. I could feel a stinger size of a dagger pierce trough my thigh, and something flowing right into my muscle.. and then.. the world turned red from pain.. I couldn''t move... paralyzed by pain from the venom.. I hoped that it would end soon.. but.. but it didn''t...

 Chapter 26: Paralyzed pt.1

    When I think about a sting from a wasp, irritation, slight pain and swelling come to mind, as .. well.. usually that''s what is expected to happen afterward. Nothing I could imagine would ever compare to this sensation, to the pain flaring so strong, that I could see nothing but red, so radiant - that my body had frozen in a single arching spasm, unable to move even a muscle. I was trying to scream, both my mind and body were screaming in agony, but nearly nothing came out.. and whatever did, was silenced by the thundering of wings.. As you guessed it - I wasn''t eaten.. I was being carried to the place of my demise.


    I lost track of time, of sanity... only the feeling of my bones being made out of molten iron, and my veins filled with sulfuric acid, each inch of muscle pierced by a thousand jagged, rotating needles, connected to an electrical grid.. Imagine someone stabbing you in the same spot, over and over.. that, but three or four times worse.. all over your body.


    Pain like that should have already caused death from shock.. or maybe at least my heart exploding from it beating too fast.. that''s what I thought.. I hoped it would happen.. it didn''t.. my heart was beating slowly, calmly.. as of I was meditating, my mind didn''t blank out from pain.. this was the worst kind of sedation I''ve ever received.


    The flaring red came to a stop, well.. rather it subsided and calmed down.. I was breathing, I was still alive.. and there was no sign of the bug from earlier, however.. well - my eyes were the only thing I could really move.. I felt paralyzed from my nose down.. not that I didn''t feel my body, I did feel the saliva dripping from my open mouth. Needless to say, I wasn''t able to swallow at all.


    It was rather dark around, but considering my eyes were used to the darkness, I would guess that I''ve been in here for at least half an hour. Above me was a stone ceiling, which looked like it was formed naturally, not with the use of any tools. The dark surface of the stone was covered in some gray moss or something like that.. it was covering it in a thin layer, taking up all of the rounded spherical ceiling, and moving down its uneven walls. I could barely make out half of the surroundings from the position I was in.. one move of the neck- even that was impossible. The air seemed a bit humid and warm, though the feeling of comfort was the least of my concern now..


    What did concern me, was the fact that I wasn''t alone in this "cave". I was able to catch a glimpse of a body that lay right on the opposite side from me. Even though my eyes hurt from the strain, I could make out just the greyish color of the skin..


    "That''s right... there was a toader.." - I thought to myself, waiting for the paralysis to air out. Somehow... even though the poison didn''t hurt or even make me feel discomfort, I was still in the same state. Then, the wasps returned.. I could hear the screeching footsteps, clawing on the stone getting closer and closer.. moving past my body.. and dropping another toader into this cave.


    I felt doomed.. when it came to sentient beings, humans or whatever.. I''d guess there was a chance of mistake, mishap in their plan, stupidity.. but.. nature is scary. Nothing happened without a reason, nothing was armed like it was without a reason... and insects.. group insect of all of the creatures, were efficient..


    "There''s only one reason why an insect would drag a body to its hideout.. food.. but not for the big ones.." - Images of documentaries and short clips had popped up inside of my head, rushing like a sped up movie.. A guy that went by the name of Coyote took a sting from a tarantula hawk on camera, but even though the pain I felt was on a different scale.. The wasp - the way I believed it to act was the same.. I looked at the dark irises of the toader that was just thrown to the ground next to me. It was like looking in a mirror.. the same fear was radiating from the eyes of the grey, warted creature. Its mouth was spread open by the wasp that had just arrived.. its spiky claws opened the mouth gently, not even drawing the tiniest amount of blood. The mandibles were moving up and around as the creature stared at the defenseless and loomed closer. I couldn''t take my eyes off of the toad.. but then, my head was grabbed by the hard, spiky claws and made to face the gargantuan bug.. up close the wasp was not even slightly less terrifying.. the faceted eyes were getting closer, its shell was shiny during the daylight, but now it was simply pitch-black.. I heard the mandibles munching, as well as its long and sharp tongue swirl around them, as if cleaning ... I wanted to look away, but no matter how I tried.. nothing happened - I was not in control of my own body..the wasp was..This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it


    I could feel the hooked hard claws touch my lips and carefully make their way into my mouth.. I felt how they scraped on my teeth, as the wasp had opened my mouth, slowly - not to accidentally break the jaw open. It was handling me with utmost care.. but all I could look at - were the mandibles and the copper colored tongue, that was moving between them and getting thicker.. The disgusting sound of scraping of chitin rang in my ears, the rustling of the claws inside my mouth, as they moved my tongue, was deafening.. My heart would race if it could.. but even that... was out of the control of my body. The bug inched closer and closer.. I shut my eyes closed.. I couldn''t look at it any longer, but this wasn''t the best decision. I could feel the touch of the creature even better now, to my own horror.. and I could tell that it''s open mandibles were just a few centimeters away from my face.. Even though it didn''t radiate any heat, it was the same feeling like someone putting a finger really close to your skin between the eyes.. Then.. I felt something drip into my wide open mouth.. just a drop - it was liquid and sweet, crazy sweet to be honest.. It was like sugary, oily water, mixed with honey.. however just a second later the feeling of something else touching the tongue made me scream in terror.. It wasn''t necessary to see what it was to guess.. the swollen tongue was going inside of my own mouth, sharp and covered in the sweet oily substance.. I would gag if I could, I would throw up if I could.. but it was in control.. and it continued to slide the thick tongue deeper, sliding on the surface of my own tongue, like a sled on a road. If I''d have to choose a scale for the thing sliding inside my mouth, I could easily shout "banana for scale" and be a hundred percent right.. It was as thick.. and THAT.. moved inside my mouth, touching the cheeks, the top of the mouth and the...the teeth with its sharp end, as if studying and looking around.. It was the most disturbingly disgusting french kiss in my life.. it didn''t hurry at all...


    " Get it over with.." - I kept my eyes shut, trying to think about anything else but what was happening now.. didn''t work at all.. The tongue of the wasp moved towards my throat, waving and pushing.. until I felt my throat contract and the tongue move under the pressure it was making.. IT made me start swallowing... and the tongue of the wasp, like a tentacle - went on with its task.. moving into my throat and down.. There was no gag reflex, it just went right in, moving and controlling my body as it pleased.. one of the hind claws went on to feel my stomach.. and I felt the long tongue of the creature approach its destination. All I could hear was the loud slushing noise, like someone was loudly chewing.. I felt the oily, honey-like substance drip from my mouth, moving along the patchy hair of my beard and onto the chest.


    Then.. it started.. Contracting and thickening in waves, the tongue started pumping.. I guess force-feeding would be the closest thing to this.. but to me.. it felt like reverse throwing up. By the shape of the things that were going into my stomach along with the liquid.. I could tell that they were eggs. They weren''t all that large.. just the size of a marble.. somehow strange considering the size of the bug... but there were quite a lot of them.. I counted over thirty...focusing on the numbers, trying to deafen out the feeling and the sounds by screaming in my mind..


    I wasn''t able to tell when it all stopped.. But my head was placed back on the soft moss.. which was just the surface of the wasps nest.. And I laid there.. staring at the ceiling.. ignoring the sounds that came all around me. I didn''t see the stones, I didn''t want to.. only the darkness..


    The wasps left.. but I could feel the occasional twitching inside of my stomach.. the eggs were going to hatch sooner or later..


    ...

 Chapter 27: Paralyzed pt.2

    It''s been nearly four hours after the wasp had deep-throated the hell out of me and pumped my stomach full of eggs. I still couldn''t move, though something else I''ve noticed.. Well.. considering I''ve been paralyzed, I thought that the contents of my bladder and bowel would find their way out.. but I didn''t soil myself. Grand fucking achievement.. but reason behind this had escaped me.. it had to be due to either the way the poison affected by nervous system and body.. or the "honey" that filled me up to my throat along with the offspring of the bugs.. Which, by the way, isn''t an overestimation, my stomach was bulging like after a few hours in an all you can eat buffet.


    I tried to move my neck - to no success, the same went for the other parts of my body. Unable to lift even a finger.. not even move an eyebrow.. all that was left under my control seemed to be the eyelids, and the eyes..


    "Its agonizing to wait for death like that..." - What''s worse - I doubted that my death would come quickly. Somehow.. I was afraid, but not terrified.. I''ve burned out, tired of the maddening fear.. like one would be tired of sprinting..a person could feel terror for only so long. Like jump-scares - after a few hours you stop giving a fuck about fear and start paying attention to other things.. Right now, I paid attention to the lack of any sounds... it was quiet, which had me realize - there was no whispering...


    "If you think about it... there was no sign of the whispers other than the dream.. what''s up with that.." - I hated the whispers, but now that I''ve been stuck waiting for my demise from being eaten by some maggots, their presence was rather tempting. I tried recalling everything I knew about the sound.. not the most pleasant way to spend the time..


    "Its annoying, its present in the dream... I definitely heard it when the quake began.." - Was there anything else? I really had a feeling that I forgot something. Don''t get me wrong, I had great memory, it just refused to cooperate properly.. Instead of the dreams and facts connected to them, I''d remember the play-through of the second not bright souls game using a ladle as a weapon.. really of great use right now!


    Then I remembered.. my eyes shifted towards the toad that was still looking at me with the murky tired eyes - laying on its side after the wasps did the same thing to him.


    "During the fight... that time.. it wasn''t only the sound.. I saw everything nearly the same as in the dream... black.. " - I had no idea how being colorblind was of any use, but I tried recalling the feeling. If only it was this easy to do... Of course I couldn''t remember, a "feeling" isn''t something that I could just outright fucking remember. Annoyed, I''ve closed my eyes, but then, as I was going through my memories of the dream... suddenly.. I recalled that there was.. well most probably.. there was no mark on my hand, not like I was certain. That could mean nothing, but at the same time - it could mean everything. At the very least I had to cling to the idea that the mark could magically save my ass in this situation.. otherwise.. I was fucked.


    Besides.. all I had to do was sleep, that''s exactly the thing I could do. Which appeared to be quite a lot harder to do in the situation than it seemed to me at first. With the panting of quiet breaths all around, as well as the feeling of being stuffed with nearly three dozens twitching eggs.. wasn''t the best for attempting to force yourself to sleep. So I had to close my eyes and use the method I came upon when trying out inducing lucid dreams, one that I found useful to fall asleep at least, that was the only use for this bullshit technique.. - somehow the black dream was the only thing that I was sure about - and the only hope I had.. to fall asleep I''d have to be calm, but, despite the unnaturally even heart rate and my breathing - that was happening without my consent, my mind was far from calm. It was anything BUT calm... So I began... imagining a set of stairs going down, with me being on top of them, descending step by step.. slowly, like I was retarded.. trying to kill out any lingering thoughts as I did.


    "One..."


    "Two.. " - all the sound around me began to fade, or so I told so to myself.


    ...


    "Twelve" - that''s where self-hypnosis was up, I didn''t hear a thing. Of course it wasn''t a real thing, just mere self persuasion. However if you try hard enough, you can make yourself believe most interesting shit, like tooth fairy, or the big bearded guy in the sky.. or that your life matters. Ah.. the good old lies..


    "Thirteen"


    Only paying attention to the heartbeat and the breathing, I''ve been going down the flight of stairs for a while. Sooner or later my mind would force shut-down and I''d fall asleep. That''s how it usually worked. Slow steps, no thoughts and sound of breathing and the thuds of the heartbeat - super effective version of counting sheep. I felt sleep being right there, somewhere three or four steps further down. My invisible foot rose as I made another step..Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.


    "Wh.. aagh!" - my eyes popped open from the pain that catapulted me back the fuck from the sweet dreams. Something... bit my stomach.. from the inside.


    "Oh shitshitshit.. Why so soon?" - Really, not even seven hours had passed and the eggs were already hatching? I looked at the toad next to me, its eyes trembling from the same pain that soon waved over me. Its stomach looked like something was wriggling around in it.. bloated and stretched, I could see the thrusting of the worm-like larva inside.. That meant that the same was happening to me.. and it did..


    Feeling of larva, the size of a thumb, violently wriggle inside your gut, scraping on the stomach walls was far from pleasant.. their small, segmented bodies rolling around as the tiny mandibles cut away at the flesh. The thing though.. there were over thirty of them, and slowly they were ALL chewing on the stomach walls! I would scream and roll around in pain if I had the option, I would stick my hand into my throat to force myself to vomit, but.. I didn''t have that luxury.. I was still - with the exception of my eyes.. paralyzed.


    Pain wasn''t that great when compared to the agony which I was facing when injected with the wasp poison, but pain wasn''t what terrified. Being eaten alive, not being able to do a thing, struggle, having no choice - that was terrifying.. that.. and seeing what was happening to the toader in front of me..


    I couldn''t take my eyes off of the sight of his stomach moving in waves, like dozens of fingers were stretching the skin on his belly, wriggling, moving.. The terror and pain in the eyes of the toad was the only sign of the nightmare that it went through.. There were no screams, no thrashing - silent, nearly nonexistent breathing, calm - unfit for the situation.. it.. all of us were going through..


    The feeling of dozens of small mandibles ripping my flesh bit by bit, eating at me, consuming my body and blood.. penetrated my whole being.. I felt it all too good.. I could tell which larva was taking a bite, and which was already pulling the flesh out- to rip a bigger chunk off.. Despite that, I was still looking at the toad in horror.. unblinking.. looking into my own nearest future..


    The larva were digging through the flesh of the toad... I could see the tiny blackish heads mounted on the fat worm-like torsos'' stretch the gray skin of the toad, cleaning it of the remaining flesh and gnawing on the lower layer of its hide.. slowly.. .. slowly more and more black bumps protruded from the round belly of the silently suffering creature. It looked like the skin was covered with dozens of black warts, shiny and growing larger by the second, moving from right.. to left.. as the younglings of the wasps made wriggled their way out.. Finally the skin gave out.. it ripped, letting the larva through.. the tiny monsters didn''t hurry, they were chewing on the flaps of the skin almost in unison.. but that took only a brief moment..


    Pain in my own stomach became sharper, suddenly there were a lot more movement inside.. the larva thrashed like eels on a hot pan, wriggling and scratching on the stomach and my innards violently.. but I could only.. keep watching.. keep watching the dying toader..


    These monsters crawled out of the tunnels they dug inside of the body, being covered in blood and yellowish secretion, as well as the honey that filled our stomachs.. The black gaping holes they made didn''t bleed much, keeping open.. revealing the flash that was dug through like some old piece of wood.. The holes looked like cells of a hive, separated by thin lines of flesh and skin.. If there was light, I''d probably be able to see the whole route they made, right into the stomach, where other larva were still wriggling, or digging in other directions.


    The ones that dug out.. they crawled out of these black wounds, slowly - the fat thumb-sized larva wriggled out one by one, crawling on the surface of the skin... some of them immediately went right back into the holes, from which other larva started to come out.. some moved in, some moved out, some simply poked their blood-covered black heads out..


    I could see that some of the larva didn''t find their way out... and kept digging from the stomach, under the skin.. making their way up the body.. The ones that came out of the holes and left, were faster to get up, to the face of the toader.. I didn''t understand their rush to get to it''s head.. but as three of these vile creatures started to clump over the eyes of the toad...I understood that they were just after the food they enjoyed.. Blood poured , covering the pale, fat bodies of the larva as their small bumps for feet pushed them inside of the eye socket.. until none of them remained outside.. the whole bunch was wriggling under the half-opened eyelid, their bodies curling up into a ball, as if they were making an eye out of themselves.. though I knew that it wasn''t the case.. the gluttonous creatures were simply eating every single piece of the eye.. cleaning each other .. I could hear the tiny mandibles scratch on the skull of the toad, as they made their way to the back side of its eye-socket..having completely devoured the eyeball.. their secretions, were flowing out of the gaping black hole in the head of the creature, like tears it couldn''t shed...


    What was the worst part of this sight? I could still see the chest of the toad rise and fall at the same monotone intervals, calmly.. it was.. still.. alive.


    Somehow.. there was no more thrashing inside of my stomach, but I couldn''t look down far enough.. to tell if it was because the larva had dug their way out.


    My mind tensed as I felt something slowly slide on my forehead.. I immediately clenched my eyes shut, as if that.. could help..

 Not a Chapter

    Ok, I found out that it''s impossible to write a chapter in public transportation from a phone.. so the chapter will be posted in the evening when I''m finally free.


    In the mean time, I figured I''d throw in some ideas and shtuff.


    Firstly- I figured that the main trait of the main character (the good visual memory for videos) is something I can include YOU lot in.


    So if you want - you can share links to a youtube video here OR if you want to be sneaky about it- pm me. That way it probably will be trully random - plus that''s my appreciation for reading my scribbles.This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it


    Second-I was surprised to first see our novel on the main page. (At first I thought someone used the same cover..) .. and then I found us climbing higher in the "popular this week" .. all the way up to page 5.. you know, close to the cool ppl :D


    I''d never rate my work that high (a 3 max), so it''s fucking amazing you ppl like this novel.


    Lastly- well, other than trying to come up with suitable rewards for ppl that helped me improve this with their advice, I can only chat atm.. *wink wink* talktomeIhavenofriends

 Chapter 28: F*ck the larva

    I could feel my eyelids tremble as I pushed them together with all the power I had in my body. Somehow calmly giving up to die didn''t seem like the course of action I was ever going to take.. well - unless dying was what I wanted. I was going to die on my own terms, having made a conscious decision on that. Seconds passed as I felt more weight on my forehead, slightly wet, some slimy substance was sliding over it..


    "Doesn''t really feel like a larva.." - My eyes slowly opened, as I tried to look around to the most of my ability. This, however, wasn''t necessary.. one look above me gave the answer right away.. a strand of the material that the "nest" was made of, detached itself from the wall and was now residing on my face. I would give out a sigh of relief, but my breathing was still something I could not control.


    "The thrashing stopped though.." - Indeed, the thrashing inside of my stomach stopped...for a brief moment.. As after a slight delay, the larva became active again.. their efforts doubled ... more aggressive. I jinxed it..


    My mind went blank for a brief moment, as I felt the worms moving around my stomach.. the difference? They weren''t eating with the same slow and patient tempo, they were agitated by something.. and that - made their actions hurt a whole lot more. I felt the larva rapidly rush up the stomach, trying to go through the esophagus, all at the same time.. a few made it through - but ultimately, a number of them got stuck, clogging the esophagus with their bodies, which apparently had tiny spikes on them.. I could feel them trying to wriggle through, more larva pushing up and causing the clogged ones to scrape the tube and get stuck even harder.. That''s when the larva spread out and started chewing, ripping flesh and trying to claw their way out of my belly..some made their way out towards the natural exit, as I felt them becoming impatient and starting to dig their way through the walls of my intestines. My whole belly seemed to be wriggling, as if a spawn of Shub-Niggurath was trying to find it''s way through, digging out with its branch-like tentacles..


    The larva made their way through the walls of my stomach - wriggling into my abdomen. It was like a dozen slimy fingers running along my insides, making their way around the organs and trying to find the way out.. I could feel the tiny stub-like feet attach themselves as they crawled along the inner side of my abdominal muscles.. I dreaded what came next, as it was the same fate as the toader... they began their way to the surface - gnawing on the muscles and wriggling right through the fibers, ripping them apart.


    The other larva, which had been lucky not to get stuck in the esophagus... made their way up my throat, and now - were crawling right into my mouth. I immediately felt the sweet taste of the honey they were covered it.. right now.. it was revolting, as the oily spawns were wriggling along my tongue, their bodies moving in a wave pattern, brushing along the taste buds, making me scream in my mind - unable to do anything... Their small heads popped between the teeth and forcibly opened my mouth.. there were a bit too many of them, as I felt my lips stretch as all of them rushed right out.. In horror I looked down - seeing the pale bodies pop out of my own mouth like multiple tentacles. They were covered in the feeding liquid.. which was colored red due to the blood that got mixed into it, small bubbles of air and tiny pieces of my own flesh lined both the worms, as well as the whole inside of my mouth.. I could feel the minced meat that was made out of myself on my tongue.. The larva popped out all at once.. scattering and sliding all over my face, dropping lower.. ever so slowly.. their wriggling bodies were moving slowly...


    Their friends, still trapped inside of my body, seemed to go completely crazy and started chewing through everything withing their reach.. I could feel the worms bite through the abdominal muscles.. mete centimeters away from the skin... but all of them were becoming even slower - as if they were tired, out of energy.. It was then.. that my vision shifted.. and a cold feeling spread through my whole body, like someone pouring liquid nitrogen right through my veins..Reading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there.


    I could feel something happening, something moving inside of me.. not the worms, it was akin to a liquid that poured right through my body.. I could sense it - I could feel its shape. It was dark and intangible, and it was coming out of the tiny bodies of larva, which were getting weaker by the second. The feeling was bizarre, a new type of high..


    The larva were dying, and this.. this inky, ghostly substance..it was pouring somewhere inside of me.. spreading right through every fiber of my body, running along both my veins, bones and nerves at the same time.. It was more pleasurable than anything I''ve felt, or done, or been done to. Wave after wave of pleasure was spreading through my body, making even my scalp tingle.. indescribable all consuming euphoria.. I was on the peak of pleasure and it wasn''t going down at all..


    God knows how long it lasted, as I blacked out in the middle of it... But.. I woke up.. and my eyes weren''t eaten.. and I couldn''t feel any maggots chewing though me.. only my racing heartbeat and elevated breathing..


    " I''M BREATHING?!" - The realization struck me with a force of a sledgehammer... I could breathe on my own accord, I could breathe faster, or slower.. exhale and inhale.. that meant - the paralysis wasn''t permanent.. it wasn''t irreversible.. I nearly laughed, slowly understanding why it went like this ...


    "Paper-leaf.." - my chest was twitching from laughter.. though it was just me exhaling loudly in short outbursts..


    "It''s probably the fucking fungus in my blood... FUCK YOU WASPS! I already have a parasite inside of me!" - For whatever reason- the fungus had killed off the creatures that ate the contaminated flesh, which drank and swam in the vile blood.. and they died.. even the ones lying on the ground beside my head.. were dead - curled up and burly, looking more like ugly potatoes... they died and I survived this torture and was alive..


    "So there are dead bugs inside of me now.." - the thought wasn''t that pleasant.. though the score was still in my favor.. I didn''t bleed to death.. once again - thanks to the fungus... I didn''t feel much pain.. Rotting bodies of the larva could kill me withing a short time, but.. but I didn''t even feel the ones that were digging through my abs.. I breathed larger breaths and felt.. nothing out of ordinary. Minor aching, but I didn''t feel like there were dead bugs floating in honey within my guts.. Everything seemed.. well - solid.


    "I have a fungus inside of me. Hah.. Should I shout Waaagh!?" - the aftereffects of the pleasure made my mood too optimistic and .. good.. too good for the situation I was in.. As .. even though I survived and could breathe.. I was still within the breeding chamber of the wasps... right next to the chewed up body of a toad, covered in banana sized larva.. Not the right time to be laughing in glee within your mind..


    Especially considering that another toader was just thrown on the ground into the cave.. Three wasps entered it.. two had toads with them, and the last one.. well - it started plucking the fattened larva off of the body of the toader.. or I''d rather say off of the mostly digested remains of the creature and moved them into a sort of a basket, or a nest, fixed on it''s back.. where the wings should have been. I could hear the skittering motions of the wasps, as one of them loomed over me, touching my skin with its antennae. I steadied my breathing as much as I could, but I could do jack-shit about my racing heart.. it continued looking at me with curiosity for a few moments..


    "Leave.. please leave.." - I begged silently - looking into the faceted eyes of the creature.. If it could sense that something was off with me... I didn''t want to think what could happen then..


    The giant wasp moved away from me, scraping the stone floor with it''s hard long feet.... then I felt hard mandibles clench my shin and start pulling my body, stone floor brushed along my back...

 Chapter 29: Murky eyes

    I could feel myself being moved, sharp mandibles digging right into my skin. The back of my head was being dragged over the sand and stones on the ground, making it sound like the rubbing of sandpaper over. My long messy hair acted as a mop and collected a whole bunch stones and moss-like material along the way.. Somehow, I wasn''t being dragged towards the exit from the cave, but, on the contrary, to the far wall - where the new "hosts" were positioned. Slight anxiety faded just to allow for another wave of worry wash over me..


    The wasp started rotating my body and laying me down beside the live toaders, placing my arms along my body, as they''ve got stuck in some weird position when it was rolling me towards the wall. It was careful not to break anything.. destroying my body seemed to be the privilege of the young larva... Then the wasp simply left me alone and gone cleaning up the mess larva left after themselves, leaving towards the other part of the cave.


    I closed my eyes for a second calming myself down, then opened them right away.. Slight surprise was reflected in my eyes.. I repeated the process of closing and opening my eyes a few extra times.. just to make sure that what I was seeing was real. As for what I saw .. well.. something unreal and crazy.. The whole black substance inside of my body thing.. I could tell it was there, not even that - I could see the amorphous mass inside of me... though I couldn''t grasp its size..


    My brain didn''t process it.. even though it was "inside" of the body.. it didn''t have definite size - it was like peeking through a screen.. looking at an object without any measure of scale... It could be an ant-sized mountain, or a mountain-sized ant.. bizarre and strange.. though it was certainly there.. right inside of my chest, a curled up ball of black string..with black liquid swirling inside of it..


    " Ok.. if that''s not magic.. call me Lucy.. " - I was utterly confused, somewhat agitated .. but mostly - curious. I looked at the same spot with my eyes open.. even though I couldn''t see it when looking directly, there was still the same sort of a radiant outline.. like a highlight that I could notice with the corner of my eye. I couldn''t stop "looking" at its movements, slow and flowing - it was mesmerizing. My curiosity got the best of me and made me try to look a the toads to the left.. well.. not at them.. away from them unfocusing my vision, trying to notice the outline. Which worked.. in the spot where my vision became blurry, I saw something similar to what was inside of my chest..


    Though - I soon figured out that you can just relax your eyes, making your vision blurry - which allows you to look straight and still see the contrast of light and dark that outlines the black swirling mass.


    "They''ve had the same thing inside of them as me.." - Same - not the exact word that should have been used. Where their swirlies looked like they were a bundle of snakes made of smoke, mine felt like a few strings tied into a knot .. that''s where my mind started coming up with different sorts of ideas.. well, rather tried different concepts - looking for something that could match.. something that could provide even a semblance of an explanation.. Souls, humanity, exp, anything.. first things that popped into my mind really... Next was mana - of course it wasn''t the cliche blue color...I wasn''t judging though.


    "Ok.. So.. is this IT?" - I somehow got my hopes up, thinking that this could very well be the "ability", the "skill" that would change everything.. well.. if you forget the fact that I''m a cheaper and less funny version of Mr.Pool.. Even though I didn''t bleed to death from being turned into worm food, my fingers didn''t grow back ..


    The issue.. the main issue.. the most damned obvious main issue.. still remained.. I was laying on the damp and warm stone floor, unable to move nearly anything.. even though I COULD breathe. That - was somehow strange.. before - the only thing that I could control were the eyes. I couldn''t really understand it completely, however I had some ideas.. which unfortunately had to wait..


    ...it was feeding time..


    "I didn''t even have enough time to miss you.." - I was looking in the darkness at the figure of a giant wasp - which seemed contoured right over the pitch dark fog. It was so full of the.. inky stuff.. that the highlight it radiated was easily seen. In comparison to the toader.. it seemed so much more.. deeper.. darker.. bigger.. even without exact measurements this much was really obvious. I really have to get my synonym game up, ninety percent of what I was able to make out in this cave void of light, was ..black.


    The sharp claws made their way to my mouth.. and once again.. the dreadful event happened all over.. in the exact same fashion... Disgust, pain, pleasure.. and before I could think of a way to escape, for a way to more.. it would repeat itself..


    Again..


    And again..


    And again..


    ...


    My bloodshot eyes were looking at the stone ceiling.. I wasn''t sleeping any more, not for a while anyway.. It was sixteen feeding cycles so far.. even though I thought that the wasps would figure something out and dispose of the thing that was killing their young.. they fucking didn''t.. which made me angry, not just angry.. I hated them with all my soul - or something like that, I couldn''t tell of I was mad or simply grumpy. The wasps were mind-rapingly retarded.. thoughtless creatures working on pure instinct, meaning they do what they usually do.. over and fucking over again.. Inbred shit-brain bastard.. I am killing off everything you put in me! Notice it already! You use the same host over and over again, dispose of the trash or something.. the wasps were persistent as all hell.. or they thought I was a fresh body every time.


    I hated the toads for dying so easily.. they were lucky that their suffering ended within a few hours.. Leaving me there waiting for the wasps to move my body to an empty spot, clean up and start laying eggs inside my stomach once more... I doubted that my mind was intact at this point, whispers turned to murmurs and faded into nothingness... whispers which were the only thing accompanying me in the silence.. I was truly getting lonely..


    What''s worse.. even though there was so much hope for the black swirly thing inside me.. nothing changed.. not a single damn thing.. The swirlies inside of toads seemed as pathetic, the swirlies in the wasps were as menacing, my own.. Didn''t change at all.. though with all the looking at them.. I finally figured it out, the reason my lungs were under my own control.. It was where the swirlies floated, a lot of them actually..


    As I thought of breathing, even without an audible thought, the movement changed, making my body obey and move along.. Yep, I wasn''t controlling my body.. I was in fact completely paralyzed from head to toe.. Its just that I''ve been "breathing" consciously because of the black thing inside.. The same went for my eyes.. and considering just how much time had passed from the moment I was stung.. I guessed the damage was permanent.. of course.. there was the possibility of me figuring out how to make my body move using the swirly-swirl.. though that had to wait until after the "dinner" to think again.


    "Hello there" - I stared right into the eyes of the wasp, in my mind I was cheerfully smiling as I greeted the creature. I really wanted to burn every single one of them, rip them apart and exterminate each specimen of their kin, from the tiniest egg to the last feeder.. and this particular one, I''d crush inch by inch - making sure it survived long enough to see me feast on its insides.. just to make a point you know.. Small droplets of sweat were sliding down my forehead, along the patchy beard and over my neck. Despite my hatred for the creatures, that tortured me to the point I started doubting my own sanity, I could do utterly nothing.. well..almost - I focused on every other sensation other than the bitter-sweet taste and the feeling of the giant insect tongue waving around in my mouth and throat.. ignoring the feeling of these living marbles going down my esophagus..


    "And again.. you''re a sloppy kisser" ..


    ...


    I didn''t notice when I drifted into sleep, time had little power over me.. if I had to guess, I''d say I was awake for quite long.. I think it was when the number of feeding cycles climbed over the twenties that my mind gave out and decided to shut down. Oh the sleep, it was so good to be out of that damp warm cave filled to the brim with death and decay..


    I was laying on the charred ground within the dream, it was dry and dusty.. here my body was still able to move, unlike in reality, so I sat up - staring at the dark swirling sun. I looked pathetic, on the verge of giving up..I touched my face, feeling the dry, cracked skin, the blackish swollen eyes, that looked as if I colored them with pur-map.. my half-dead eyes showed little but the hate, my expressions could change.. but the eyes.. they showed that I understood the rules..


    The tendrils in the sky were fear-inducing.. Just as the insects that had been menacing, the sun seemed to get a deeper feeling to it.. really, why would it even get even more overwhelming than it was.. It was truly making me feel afraid for some reason... a simple fear..


    ".. please.." - I stared at the thing in the sky, pleading, begging in my thoughts. Somehow, this hulking giant blob in the sky.. was the only thing that I could ask for anything..


    " HELP ME! Anything.. the very smallest thing.. " - I shouted, straining my throat inside of the dream, thundering the words..I was rather quiet compared to the usual sound of the "star".. My scream turned into a barely audible whisper at the end of the phrase - fading into silence just as abruptly, getting lost in the nothingness.. however, a change occurred.. it began to rain.. Inside of this black space it began to rain.. droplets, which looked like someone was splashing ink, landed on my face, landed on the ground.. and... I woke up.


    I could feel the slight difference immediately.. No, I didn''t simply jump up and rush the hell away from the hive.. I felt the burning feeling spreading over my chest, small needles piercing and charring me inside-out. I looked at the swirling mass inside of my chest, there could really be no other perpetrator. Even though it still looked as pathetic as before, I could tell the difference.. there was more of the black string-like tendrils, which was something I wasn''t able to feel from the swirling mass of other creatures.. I could feel it reach somewhere else, as if a tube was going right from it.. somewhere. It could be going into the dream, it could go anywhere for all I cared.. An umbilical cord connecting real and unreal... I only felt it because.. drop by drop.. the dark matter was dripping into the thin coil which I was able to see...


    The swirling mass seemed to stretch, as if something was pushing on it from the inside...then it slowly started to produce smoke. Light and nearly transparent, like diluted gray paint flowing in a glass of water..the smoke clouded around the tendril covered clump of darkness - increasing in volume.. spreading over my whole body.. I didn''t like how it was going, nor the feeling... The smoke hurt, and not a little bit.. It was burning like all hell, feeling like acid running though my body. I didn''t withstand it, in my mind I was yelling it to stop. The feeling was so much worse than the larva eating though my flesh, or chomping on my insides..


    I stopped it similarly to how you stop coughing.. forcing myself to hold it in.. I really don''t get how it worked out like that.. but it did.. and just as coughing - every spasm of the string-like clump in my chest made me exhale some tiny speck of smoke as I failed to hold it in. With it fuming out, pain rushed through.. dissolving and fading over the next few seconds.


    "This.. this is new.." - I was panting, sweating all over, trying to get used to the feeling of holding IT in. I could tell that it wasn''t just me or the toads.. everything around emanated a slight black glow.. like it was thinly painted with the glow.. Despite the pain.. this was the seeming light and the possible chance.


    "If this isn''t mana.. call me Ann.." - I''ve regained my composure..closing the heavy eyelids for a moment.. the whole new hope made my mood a lot better. Though the feeling of wasps claws on my face worsened the whole deal.. Another cycle..again.


    ...


    It took me three "feeding" cycles to figure out where to begin with this mana thing... For one - I could hold it inside, letting it swirl inside of the thin tangled up strings. I could also release it, making my body hurt from the worst burning sensation ever.. But all that wasn''t of that much help.. I''ve already had enough sources of pain, but I kept releasing and stopping the flow.. getting used to the sensations, as well as trying to figure the mana out - understand how it works. For one, it was like discovering a new sense.. yep.. I could "touch" myself when releasing the smoke.. not with the smoke itself, but with something else radiating from it..


    "It''s all just too complicated.." - It was indeed. All of the new feelings combined, they provided so much information, that I couldn''t process it properly. I felt retarded - it was like jumping into a game with impossibly complicated controls, without any clue whatsoever what or how to do anything.


    ...


    It took me five more cycles to understand something rather important. I looked at the tangled strings of darkness in my chest, looked at them for hours and hours, as I was fed, or torn from the inside by the wriggling baby wasps - my eyes, closed or opened weren''t looking away, anxious to miss any smallest detail.. I''ve seen the wriggle of the tiny, nearly invisible tentacles towards the larva that have died inside of me. I''ve seen them being consumed as pure pleasure was going through my whole body.. then, they dissolved.. I didn''t get the whole pleasure ordeal, but pleasure was a good incentive to go on doing whatever you were doing.. or it was a trap.. who knows..


    "The small tentacles that appear.. for some reason, unlike the swirly swirls.. they disappear.. and there must certainly be a reason for that." - That''s what had been on my mind for the whole time. There had to be a trick to why the strings were still right there.


    When I finally noticed that the strings were emanating the smallest amounts of smoke, barely visible.. Miniscule as the amount was - it was what kept the strings there.. And no matter how I tried - that wasn''t something I''d be able to stop with force of will, well.. rather I wasn''t able to.. even for the sake of experiment. I was getting closer to the answers, and prayed that fate would allow me to get them before fucking me up once again. A few more cycles, all that I asked for.. Indeed I was waiting for something worse to happen any moment..


    And..


    It didn''t.. Nothing worse happened for the next three feeding cycles... I was alive and my progress was making me even more worried and anxious.


    ...


    During the feeding time for the larva, or rather.. during the feeding time for me.. I''ve seen the thin tendrils move, branch out and start growing toward the "food". As it happened, I kept pouring more smoke out, which kept the tendrils intact even after the larva were consumed completely.. not only the larva, but the thin tentacles were wrapped around my stomach as a net, sucking the dark glow right out of the honey which filled me to the brim.This novel is published on a different platform. Support the original author by finding the official source.


    Of course I didn''t know how to control my stomach, and the whole array of string-like tentacles reaching from my chest downwards would be wasted.. if I didn''t come up with the most ridiculous idea that actually worked.. somewhat..


    I already knew that I could open up the "tap" or close it. That was what I''ve been doing this whole time, duh. However, I tried to make the smoke fume out of a particular spot, from a particular side. You can see where it is going. I was using the jet-like bursts of "smoke" to move the thin and long tendrils.. Idea seems easy, though there''s a couple of issues there.. for one - the smoke itself hurt like crazy.. all other three reasons are the same as first one.. a jet of smoke is nearly enough to make me scream.


    "Why does everything has to hurt like a bitch?" - My panting was getting harder as I''ve been pulling and spreading the strings around. If only I knew that I''d ultimately come to a dead end.. as when I''ve been able to make an elliptical sphere netting from my chest to my stomach..


    I couldn''t pull the tendrils further..It simply didn''t work.. they just refused to move any further. All of this effort was wasted.. as I''ve noticed the net I''ve been building start dissolving even despite the thin smoke I''ve been pushing into it.. I was left right where I was before..


    I was on the edge, and I exploded in anger.. I''ve made all of the smoke just rush out, like an almost clear mist filling every crevice of my body, allowing it to do whatever the hell it was going to do as I yelled angrily inside my mind. I could feel the thin smoke move through me, burning, making every muscle ache, making every cell scream. I was trying to thrash, trying to move with all my strength to no success. My mind was enraged, and I yelled at my own body to move.. I yelled at the smoke to do something.. I yelled at myself to move even a finger ..


    ..


    I stopped abruptly.. I felt my nail scratch on the rock below it and break a nail off, causing blood to slowly pour out.. sharp pain attracted my attention immediately.


    ...


    It hit me like a truck.. It was really that easy? My body ached, but I kept letting the thin smoke out.. going for a couple of minutes as I tried to command it once more. It didn''t work though.. I calmed my breath and tried to do the same to my mind, still agitated from the anger outburst. I thought of my body as it was in the dream.. I didn''t think of lifting a finger there, I didn''t try to lift a finger .. I just did.


    I felt like something pulled on the smoke as my finger lifted..completely in unison with the intent.


    "So that''s how it is.." - It wasn''t my mind directly moving my body.. nor was it my mind directly making the smoke move.. the mental image of myself, my imaginary dream form.. my consciousness.. call it what ever the fuck you want. I moved with it, and as if there were strings attached from it to the smoke in my body.. the body followed.. Think of the body as of a puppet and yourself as a puppeteer...


    I lifted my hand, feeling it tremble a bit.. I felt quite weak, but.. but it moved! Despite the pain, I was happy! I was able to move my hand.. no.. all of my body. Everything that I''ve had smoke in.. It was hard though.. My body seemed heavy and slugglish - as if I was too small and weak to pull my own body. Every movement was really slow and straining.. I was out of breath in just a few moments.. However, I finally figured out that emitting the smallest specks of thin smoke was enough for me to pull on, in order to move. There was no doubt, that, with time, I would be able to regain control over my body.. eventually..


    I forced the smoke back, closing the "tap" and sealing it inside of the strings. Only the small specks of blackish smoke were radiating from the strings, like a slight glow of darkness. It was a strange sight.. well, I didn''t have the time to appreciate it.. The wasps rushed in, pushing themselves into the cave with a slight buzz. They began their usual checking of the "hosts", moving the corpses out of the cave - probably either eating the remains, or dumping them somewhere.


    Right now it was dinner time.. once more. Another wasp arrived moments later and went on to feed the bodies, me being one of them... buzzing faded into the distance as my mind was filled with the wet sound of the wasp pushing its tongue into my throat and heavy feeling of the wasp caviar going into my stomach along with the honey.. I was barely able to move even a hand, I had to wait.. learn to walk, and then.. then I''m going to make my escape..


    ...


    The black plains of my dream had changed the way they looked.. It was still raining.. well - the small drizzle of occasional black drops could be considered a rain.. Main point - ashen ground became muddy, like someone spilled a whole tanker of oil over the area. It covered my soles, stretching and clinging to my feet - as if the black liquid tried to climb.. There were more and more facts pointing out the connection between the dream and real world.. Truth - that I didn''t have.. assumptions - yes, not truth.


    "Give me some more!" - I raised my voice, hearing it echoing through the empty planes.. odd considering the sound had nowhere to bounce off of.. Though that''s not the point.. the rain became stronger for a brief moment, as if the sun responded to my request without a moment of hesitation.. I was grateful - mostly because I thought that with more mana going through the body, I''d be able to achieve my goal sooner.


    Covered in the black sludge, I stood with my face looking up into the gray sky, unblinking as I listened to the whispers spreading right into my mind, I felt the whispers dig into my skin and move right through my body, flowing deep inside of my very core.


    ...


    You could think that once I regained any semblance of an ability to move, I''d crawl right out and live happily ever after.. but truth be told, it wasn''t all that simple and easy.. I remained at the same cave for god only knows how many days, even after learning that I am able to move my body using the smoke of mana.


    After the feeder wasp left once more, and I was somewhat alone, not counting the toaders about to become worm food, I tried standing up. Somehow, my wobbling feet were able to hold me standing as I pulled my body up.. my movements were unbearably slow and what didn''t help - was the amount of strength it sucked out of me just to keep such movement up. It was like trying to move with heavy weights on each limb. I had time, hours for myself.. I knew that much after the time I''ve spent in this system.


    Holding myself straight by holding to the wall, I''ve stood half bent, near a toader as my arm reached towards my mouth. Of course, now that I''ve gotten used to the disgusting tongue of the wasp waving around while jammed into my throat, it had been really hard to make myself throw up manually. I managed to do so with some persistence.. Round marbles of the wasp eggs littered the floor along with the sticky bitter-sweet honey..


    "Fuck you.." - My wobbling foot landed on the round surface of the eggs, squashing them, spreading the sticky insides of the larva over the floor. It was the first cycle that I''ve skipped.. I wasn''t going to allow these creatures to torment me and eat on my insides.. The fingers on my left arm twitched occasionally..


    For the first time in.. however long I''ve been in this cave.. I''ve stepped out of it, having made my way to the exit on the shaky legs, which were barely able to hold my own weight.


    ...


    I''ve peeked over the edge of the cave... I regretted it.. my whole body stiffened as I looked up, down and back up again... I was standing on a stone edge, and wherever I looked, it was the same picture all over... A giant sphere with small openings in it, an even bigger cave system.. somewhere up above was a single light opening.. and I had literally zero possibility to climb up to exit through it.. Dozens and dozens of wasps moved around this complex maze, my feet nearly lost all the strength...


    "H.. how am I supposed to leave?" - I could try to scale the wall, risking to fall from great heights and break every single bone, making a nice splat on the stones below.. And the wasps were never going to let me simply climb unobstructed.. There was no way to reach the top of the cave, but I already couldn''t stand being here.. I looked at the moving swarm below me, seeing them drag some toads and lizards somewhere, probably to lay even more eggs.. for a moment I thought about jumping down, head down... at least such a death would be on my own terms..


    I didn''t - I went back into the cave which was my home already.. moving along the wall, I''ve studied the interior of the cave, looking for anything, any way out.. My fingers brushed a layer of long yellowish strands of moss-like material out of the way, uncovering a crack in the wall. Pulling my body up and into the crack was a rather hard task, which left me breathless as I''ve started to crawl through the crack.. inch by inch - moving through the narrow space, until it started to grow.. Soon I''ve been able to sit up, ten or so meters inside of the wall.. before me was a dead end.. a small open pocket inside the wall, with small cracks lining the gray stone floor, walls and the ceiling.. It looked like it could all come down on me at any moment..


    It seemed safe for now, which was good enough for me.. a tiny safe haven. Even in this situation I didn''t feel completely desperate.. I wasn''t going to give up .. if I wanted to, I''d jump from the ledge and pancake myself all over the bottom of the cave.. Right now there was no need for fear.. the only thing I needed- was sleep. My heavy eyelids closed, making me flow right into the dream...


    ...


    As usual, I stood there alone, looking at the black swirling mass of darkness in the sky.. The black sun made me tremble from the inside, it made me afraid.. but why?


    Why was I afraid of the sun? It didn''t do anything to intimidate me. It didn''t hurt me did it? It wasn''t even that scary to begin with.. So then, why was I afraid of it?


    "If you think of it.. I.. made myself move a finger.. when I wanted to move it a little.. Indeed it moved a little.. I wanted the tiniest amount of help from you.." - My eyes were burning with determination, I would go against the fear.. simple as that.. - "I wanted it and you gave it to me.. or did I simply take it?"


    My right arm stretched in front of my eyes, covering the black wriggling gigantic mass in the sky.


    Then I closed my fist.. feeling the wriggling tentacles brush against my skin.. the small sphere didn''t hurt, it was just that - a tiny clump of dark tentacles that emanated a feeling of fear and dread.. It was almost enough to make me laugh.. just the thought that this tiny shrimp seemed to be a gigantic black sun, roaring in the sky.. What was roars and eerie whispers, became just silent and obedient squeaking..


    It wasn''t a sun, wasn''t a god.. it was the black energy that took my fear and molded itself using it.. Now.. now I was in control of it.. No.. the black glob was me. Not some demonic entity eager to take control of me... it was simply me.. My grip tightened as I felt the tentacles dissolve under my grasp.


    There was no more black sun in the sky, just a light-gray sky and black muddy ground as far as eyes could see.


    I felt heat inside of my chest, warm pleasant sensation - like a second heartbeat. I knew something was happening, so I decided to wake up and take a look what was going on..


    ...


    The dark strands inside of my chest broke down, exploding like a balloon. Making the black ink swirl inside of me the same within the toads, the same as the wasps - rushing and pulsing with smoke.. Waving rapidly as it changed its shape, seemingly looking for a suitable form. There was no pain any-more.. just the slight tingling sensation inside.. at first the flow looked random and uneven, but steadily it began moving a lot calmer.


    My thoughts and observations were interrupted by a loud sound.. my body reacted immediately by starting to tremble slightly and sending a chill down my spine..


    I''ve heard the wasp buzz suddenly towards the wall - angrily clacking its mandibles, it was agitated, even furious for some reason. I''ve seen the black smoke spread even out of its body, as the steady flow of mana in its upper segment of the torso began expanding and pulsating - like a heart beating rapidly. The claws began to scratch on the stone fissure in the wall, trying to get deeper.. I could hear the small pieces being torn out.. It took me a few seconds to realize it was coming after me, it noticed ME..


    "It sees me..NOW?" - There was no way to tell I was inside of here.. They didn''t mind me before, so considering the latest changes.. I understood that the wasp saw my black swirly just as I saw its.. I''ve been able to see the wasps and they were now able to see me.. That wasn''t what I hoped for at all..


    "They didn''t mind me when the flow was thin as a string.." - well wooptydoo motherfucker.. you popped the cherry of the string and fucked it all up... Before, the string-like clump was tiny, pathetic and easy to miss.. the smoke so thin and diluted that even I myself had some trouble seeing it...


    "Less.. less smoke.." - Of course I needed to stop the flow, push it back inside and hold it there.. to appear smaller.. so small the wasps wouldn''t be able to see it.. I''ve done something similar when I''ve been holding the smoke inside the string-like clump, so the general idea was in my head. Execution was, however a different thing.. If holding smoke was as easy as holding a cough in.. THIS was like gulping a whole gallon of gasoline and trying to hold it in.. without throwing up..


    The ink shrank within my body, the smoke became a bit lighter.. diluting from the blackish into pale, nearly transparent gray. My fingers that were tightly gripping on the stone wall, as I tried to push myself against it - became weak.. Less smoke meant less control.. you get the idea.. My hands slipped as I didn''t readjust my efforts accordingly to the changed weight of the body, at least that''s what it felt like... my body becoming tenfold heavy.. Falling right into the wall opposite of me, face-first.. a slight crack resonated in my skull.. The nose started bleeding - though I didn''t feel it break...


    ...


    The wasp stopped, I didn''t dare to move.. only the sound of its antennae brushing on the inside of the crack were getting to me.. I''ve felt blood slowly dripping over my mustache and the lips. The wasp seemed unsure as to what just happened, I was unsure that it would buy the act of me disappearing.. thus all of us remained still..


    Five minutes passed, and the buzzing of the wings in the distance was like a roaring applause of success for me.. I was ignored.. Something made me uncomfortable as all hell... the nose was itching from the inside like someone was putting ground pepper spoon-fulls at a time into it..


    "..." - There are a few things that are hard to ignore, an itching nose is one of the worst.. My hand was moving so slow towards the nose, that it looked like a tortoise leisurely walking towards the sunset.. and the sunset was my nose... At this rate.. it would take me at least an hour to scratch it...


    I was lucky though.. I didn''t want to find out what the wasp was capable of.


    ...


    "AWWW YISSS..." - an hour passed, my trembling arm was finally scratching the nose. Yes, it took an hour to simply raise an arm and scratch the motherfucker.. But over the time of agonizing itching, sure over-dramatization, nevertheless, I''d been thinking over the fact that my nose healed just a bit too rapidly. The sudden healing was the source of the itch.. The only change I could come up with - was the fact that the smoke spreading out from the now string-like core.. well.. it could be barely called smoke.. it was more like the shadow of the hot air flowing up from a lit candle.. more like ripples in the air, rather than smoke.. so the more diluted my mana was - more healing seemed to be done...


    Of course I''ve thought that it was strange.. as before, I didn''t seem to have the smoke inside of me.. but that was just a stupid thought. This very fact proved otherwise - for one, I''ve been only able to See the swirlies when the fight with the toaders was going on.. but.. it didn''t mean I didn''t already have it inside of me. Ultimately, so far - all of the creatures I''ve been able to look at, had it. Well.. This wasn''t really surprising, if mana was a natural thing, then - all of the creatures should have it, no?


    "I can''t move far right now" -I thought, slowly pushing myself away from the wall my face was resting at. I pushed just a speck more of the smoke, just to move a bit faster.


    "The buzzers are still working in the cave.." - I could hear their feet scratch the stone floors, I could tell this sound apart from a thousand others.. with my eyes shut and eardrums pierced.. Slight chill spread over my body whenever I heard it.. I did have reasons to dislike it...


    "I should at least get some rest.." - In truth I was eager to return to the dream, just to see how it changed.. I did ruin a huge part of it, which was the star.. As I closed my eyes, I thought about going to the dream..and felt myself falling towards the umbilical cord..I was going to open my eyes, but curiosity took me over and I allowed it to happen.. only to find myself inside of the dream again. Somehow I''ve made going into that place a habit..


    ...


    The ground was covered in the black water right up to my shin. The sky was gray as ever, and I was the only thing that stood out.


    I raised my palm up and my eyes stared into the mark on it. It was there, the same mark as in reality, circle with multitude of lines making an intricate pattern. Considering everything that happened so far, I''ve felt a bit confident.. well- cocky really. The whole black tentacle thing was mine to take from the beginning and I was just afraid of the new feeling to let it grow on me. Only thing I had to do - was ask, then take it.. Who would''ve thought that you can get answers by asking questions?


    "Just what the fuck are you?" - I tried to sound confident as my voice rang out into the emptiness. Low rumbling sound signified me being right, a question would be somewhat answered if asked correctly.. Though I really would rather see a manual, or at least a written explanation.. Not a two stories high cube that had risen out of the ground.. the black water slowly dripped off of it, revealing the smooth surface.. smooth everywhere but one spot.. leveled with the mark on my hand, the cube had the same mark, though it had a more mechanical feel to it, the segments looked movable, some lines went deeper, some protruded.. The dark-silvery disc remained still, unmoving.. I was a bit disappointed that it didn''t go spinning and revealing something that was hidden inside.


    "So is that a keyhole?" - It really looked like one to me. I stepped closer to it and pushed on the metal.. Needless to say - it didn''t budge in the slightest.. feeling cold to the touch.


    I looked around myself and wished for the water to flow.. it did, swirling into a general direction I thought of.. so.. I could try to do something more daring..


    "Should I really be trying to push my mana into the lock?" - I felt my heart-rate elevate even within the dream.. My murky eyes looked at the lock, anticipation and uncertainty radiating from my expression.


    ...

 Chapter 30: The Lock

    My outstretched arm was trembling slightly - which was understandable, as I was standing in a dream world, that''s somehow not a dream, has a connection to the real world, as well as being the only thing that apparently allowed me to move right now. Nevertheless - nothing bad happened in this place as of yet.. and besides the sun that was no more, the giant obelisk that was standing right in front of me ... well - there was literally nothing. Some mana-sludge on the floor and gray skies don''t count..


    " Really now.. " - I hesitated, so much actually that I''ve felt my stomach turn, like I had the larva dance around in it..


    "Don''t pussy out!" - I told myself as cold sweat poured down my face.. this dream is really too real.. - "Whatever is behind this.. it is valuable.. I mean look at the box.. it''s a safe vault.."


    I gulped as I felt my chest get cold. I wished for the mana to flow right towards the lock, like you would wish for your own hand to lift. The action seemed natural, I didn''t quite command the mana, nor did it follow my orders, in essence it felt like a part of my body, or.. considering it wasn''t quite the physical world - part of my mind. The black oily substance started pulling towards a single point, eventually flowing upwards - forming a sort of a column. Just like a fountain would make a vertical flow of water, it moved slow, however.


    "Damn-ass-shitgobbling-whores-crack... I''m fucking doing this!" - Saying my last goodbyes to the world, I''ve moved the black column right towards the lock. Like an oversized tentacle it waved approaching the intricate silvery disc.. and it stopped right after touching the metallic surface. I didn''t feel that kind of nervous in a long time.. really - that was some retarded cherry-popping lock-virginity kind of nervousness..


    I pushed my d... black mass of mana into the lock, slowly making my way through the labyrinth of crevices. As I did that - the world seemed to feel the attempt and it rumbled slightly, as if dozens of gears were in motion somewhere below the surface.


    The inside of the lock was a real maze.. the mana, moved along very slow... until the noise rang..


    At first I thought that the lock opened, however it didn''t move.. It didn''t even budge, it rang like mad. Ever heard a red-hot spoon being pushed into dry ice? Imagine a thousand of those ringing at the same time at different tones.. The back-side of my hand, the place where the mark was painted on, flared up - nearly blinding me by the sudden light. It was either a sign of me almost opening the lock, or the sign of it breaking.. so I thought... never lucky though..


    The mark on my hand suddenly faded and turned to black, glowing dark - absorbing the already lacking light.. Then my arm simply inflated like a balloon that someone pumped full of water. It was bubbling unevenly, as if someone shoved spheres right under my skin.. and OF fucking COURSE.. it hurt.. badly enough for me to wake up from the dream, unable to even pull out the black tentacle from the lock..


    Waking up never felt that good, mostly due to the fact that for a change - there was no pain.. just a slight itch in my right arm. I exhaled, feeling relieved. I really seemed to have been able to press the quick-load button and revert the slight fuck-up.. The pain from my arm swelling to the size of half my body - not there.This story has been unlawfully obtained without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.


    I sat there, slightly panting.. my breaths were hushed within the small confined space, muffled by the light sizzle. . .


    . . .


    " ... "


    I immediately looked at the source of the sound, at my right arm. Even in the darkness of the cave I could feel the tiny streams of smoke rise up from my forearm.. multiple places at that. It didn''t hurt, but the darker spots that felt like cracked coal didn''t promise anything good.. especially as they slowly grew larger..


    " The healing should take care of that. . ." - nope. As ten seconds passed, there was no sign of the amazing healing fungus working. In the mean time - the charred spots grew to the size of a thumb nail.. I could clearly hear the ringing popping sound as cracks opened on the spot where my flesh was previously. My mind raced as I''ve tried to think of something .. I''ve touched the charred smoking flesh, feeling that it didn''t just grow on the surface.. it grew spherically, with the center being somewhere below the skin.. I didn''t want to know what would happen when it gets to the bone, or crawls up my arm and consumes everything.. as I''ve seen it - the flesh was rapidly being destroyed..


    "Cut it off.." - Great plan! I didn''t have anything to cut or chop with.. and losing the only fully functional arm, was like dying..


    "Then cut them out.. " - My worried eyes stared at the spots, there was no stone sharp enough to cut with.. My forearm moved closer to my face.. My breathing became rapid and uneven.. the amount of fucks per second ringing in my head rose up to three digit numbers..


    My eyes closed, making wrinkles appear all over my face as I grimaced.. then opened my mouth. I bit into my forearm, trying to gnaw off the charred piece of flesh.. Did you ever try to bite yourself really hard? The brain somehow prevents you from biting hard enough to damage yourself, even though you could totally bite your own finger off.. My teeth sank into my skin, pushing it harder and harder, but other than pain I didn''t accomplish anything, chewing on the skin with all the force I could muster...


    "Just.. fucking.. DO IT!" -The head was the only part of the body I had control over without the need of mana, however.. now.. I needed it. I released subtle amounts of mana smoke, pulling my jaws close shut with a single thought.. Metallic taste of sticky blood immediately washed over my mouth. I could feel some muscle and charred flesh on my tongue... I spat it out, forcing myself not to scream from the pain... at this point my hand was already shaking, trembling..


    "DO IT!" - I yelled at myself once more.. Feeling of ripping flesh and dripping blood went on for the next few minutes. Seven times in total.. I ripped the charred flesh before it could grow too large, I ripped it out along with a whole layer of flesh which surrounded it.. My face, the whole arm, chest, legs, stomach and the floor below me was covered in blood, sticky blood.. Smell of iron dug deep into my brain as I felt my body becoming cold from the blood-loss.. My head rang and spun at the same time..my arm was laying motionless on the floor like a piece of cloth.. I cut down the flow of mana, the fucking fungus had to start working some time soon... or there will be no host to live off of..


    I couldn''t feel the arm any-more.. neither did I feel my lips, toes or the other arm.. But I didn''t die. It was proof enough that the fungus did its fucking best to save the body.. I didn''t lose consciousness.. I''ve been laying on the stone floor, covered in my own blood, with chunks of smoking flesh, that slowly charred, surrounding me.. My eyes stared into the wall coldly.. When the fungus healed me enough, I started feeling the pain from the wounds, the dull stabbing pain all over my forearm, nevertheless I didn''t look down even for a second.. I just stared at the wall... for the next three hours I remained that way..