《New World: The Tales of Everything that is Wonderful》 Cursing a Goddess in the New World - Edited ¡±AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH¡­¡­ Ah¡­?¡± Heart racing, I peeked through one eye, expecting to see the semi-truck that was speeding towards me just a moment ago. ¡®What the-- Where am I?¡¯ Instead of facing certain death, I found myself standing in the middle of a bustlingmarket that stretched all the way to a pair of stone gates in the far distance. What happened? My ears were still ringing from the truck''s horn... ¡°...Mommy? Why is that person yelling?¡± A child wearing a bright red robe was staring at me, tilting his head slightly to the side. ¡°Shhh. Don¡¯t look at people like him.¡± The child was pulled away by his mother and the two quickly disappeared into the crowd. ¡°¡­¡­¡± My head began pounding as I tried to figure out what was going on. ¡®The last thing I remember¡­. Oh yeah, there was that girl who started to cross the street even though the signal light was clearly red... didn¡¯t she see the huge truck coming?I pushed her out of the way on impulse but¡­¡± I pinched myself on the cheek to check if I was dreaming. ¡®Maybe this the afterlife?¡¯ I slapped myself a few more times, and decided that it was probably best to ask someone to help me understand the situation. But who to ask? All of the people here were dressed strangely. One man was clad in silver armor slinging a gigantic sword on his back, and another was wearing a ripped vest that revealed bulging muscles large enough to put Mike Tyson to shame. There were also women dressed in full body robes of various colors, and others who wore light armor with a sword hanging from their belt. Upon looking closer, some of these people had sharp, elongated ears and an elegant jawline that would rival the efforts of the finest plastic surgeon in Korea. ''...Elves?'' Some people even had bushy tails, animal ears, or paws. ¡®If this isn''t an illusion, it feels like I stepped into a different world or something.¡¯ With mixed feelings, I cautiously approached a middle-aged shopkeeper who was selling exotic fruits that I had never seen before. Bald men who wear aprons are usually nice, right? ¡°E-excuse me, sir. Sorry to bother you, but could you tell me where we are?¡± The man looked at me suspiciously and crossed his bushy eyebrows, forming an impressively perfect V. ¡°You lost, boy? Where are your parents?¡± ¡®Boy? I¡¯m 21 though¡­¡¯ ¡°My name¡¯s Sen and I¡¯m from a nation called Korea. Have you heard of it before?¡± ¡°¡­Never heard of anywhere like that. Kid, if you¡¯re playing some kind of make-believe game with your friends, then scram. This uncle¡¯s busy and I¡¯ve got no time to play with you, aight?¡± It was as I thought. If it really wasn''t just a hallucinationduring the last few seconds of my life, then this may bethe dream of countless people the current generation. The possibilities of epic, exciting adventures with a promise of romance blossoming during one¡¯s travels. An opportunity to live a second life in a new world! ¡®I wonder if I¡¯m going to get diarrhea from eating the food here¡­¡¯ I was never good at adapting to foreign diets. I shook my head, deciding to worry about this issue later. ''What usually happens in these cases again? I probably run into a teacher who teaches me how to fight, or I go to the adventurer''s guild to get a class.... Oh! Maybe I''ll run into a really pretty girl--" ¡°KYAAAAAAAAAAA!¡± My train of thought was cut short by a shrill scream behind me. ''...pretty girl?'' ¡°Run! Adragon¡¯s coming!¡± ¡°Help! I don¡¯t want to die!¡± ¡°To the castle! The soldiers will save us!¡± Thousands of panicked people and shopkeepers began to flee through the narrow street and a chorus of screams filled the air. ''Ah, I should''ve known this was coming.'' Beads of sweat poured like rain from my face as a deep, resounding voice rumbledfrom the skies. ¡°MMMMmmm¡­ I smelt a delicious amount of mana a moment ago.¡± A tremendous gale of wind blasted the area as a black dragon emerged above, spanning the length of an large apartment complex. ¡°Kid, get a move on!¡± The shopkeeper yelled as he grabbed my arm and pulled me in the direction of the fleeing crowd. ¡°QUICKLY!¡± ¡°EVERYONE, MOVE MOVE MOVE!¡± ¡°SOMEONE PLEASE HELP MY SON!¡± My ears perked up. Looking behind, there was the collapsed figure of a child lying in the middle of the street and covered in dirt stains. His red clothes seemed oddly familiar... ¡®Shit. Shit. Shit. Why is no one helping him?¡¯This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road. If you spot it on Amazon, please report it. I wrenched my arm away from the shopkeeper as hard as I could and dashed towards the child. ¡®I¡¯m definitely going to die this time. Keuk¡ª¡® The idea of being crunched to death in the dragon¡¯s jaws sent shivers down my spine. ¡®Just a few more meters¡­ Yes!¡¯ I grabbed the child and ducked under one of the tables in front of the nearest stall. Fuck, why did it have to be a dragon? Why couldn''t I fight a dumb slime as my first enemy? In my previous world, the final boss of every monster I faced in games was always a dragon. A monster of god-like strength and almost infinite vitality. Harbor of the ultimate magics and tactics. I was screwed. ¡°Oi, wake up!¡± I whispered while shaking the child¡¯s shoulders. There was no way that I could run fast enough carrying him. ¡®Tch, he¡¯s out cold. No choice then.¡¯ Leaving the child behind, I emerged alone and began sprinting in the direction of the fleeing crowd. ¡°Hey you, stupid lizard! Try to catch me!¡± ¡®What am I doing? Ack¡­ Saving two people in two worlds is not so bad though. I¡¯m sure I¡¯ll be rewarded in the afterlife.¡¯ ¡°LIZARD? I AM A BLACK DRAGON WHO HAS LIVED OVER 2000 YEARS. DIE, FOOLISH HUMAN.¡± ----------------------------------------------------------- ¡ºDragon¡¯s Roar¡»has been cast. - All stats have been temporarily reduced by 10 - Max health and mana have been reduced by 25% - Your rate of stamina recovery will fall by 25% - You are immobilized for 10 seconds ------------------------------------------------------------ ¡®Eh?¡¯ I was frozen on the spot in a running pose with the message popped up in front of me. ¡°¡ºDragon¡¯s Roar¡»...You¡¯re kidding me, right?¡± Glaring with hostility, the dragon breathed in deeply and fired a duplex-sized fireball at me. I could feel the heat roasting my back like a baked potato. ¡°¡ºCobalt Shield¡»!¡± A voice cried out behind me and a shield of watersuddenly materialized between me and the fireball. Boom! The fire and water collided to form a tremendous amount of pressurized steam, and I was sent flying into a nearby stall, breaking the wooden frame holding up the store sign. ¡°Keueuk¡ª¡° My mouth tasted like iron and my back felt like it was on fire. The steam alone had probably meltedmost of the skin off my back, and there was no doubt in my mind that I''d soon die of anemia or fluid loss. ¡®I¡¯ve got to escape.¡¯ I tried to will my arms to push against the dirt but it was hopeless. I had probably popped a shoulder, given that it just hung loosely without moving.My vision began to blur. In the midst of screams and gusts of wind, a strong commanding voice resonated from a blurry figure in the distance. ¡°Medic, take the boy! Units 1 and 2, take the vanguard! Units 3 through 5, prepare offensive magic and target the dragon¡¯s eyes! Priests, support the vanguard!¡± As my vision turned black, I felt a pair of strong arms lift me up. * * * Oh, hey there. ¡®Eh? Who are you?¡¯ My name is Lilianna. You can call me Lily. Hmm¡­ I guess to you I''d be a goddess. ¡®Then¡­ am I dead?¡¯ No, you¡¯re just sleeping. You¡¯ll wake up soon. ¡®Ah, I see. That¡¯s good.¡¯ ¡­ ¡®Could you please tell me what¡¯s going on? Where was I?¡¯ Well¡­ that''s a long story. To be honest, this is kind of embarrassing. I was going on a vacation to Earth, you see, but I was preparing last minute so the body I created wasn¡¯t working very well. ¡®¡­¡¯ My eyes were particularly crappy, but I didn''t care becauseI was just so happy to be on vacation. However... I couldn¡¯t see colors properly, so I didn''t see the red light. ¡®So you¡¯re saying¡­¡¯ Yeah, I was the one you saved, although I wouldn¡¯t have really died. ¡®¡­¡¯ Anyway, I felt really bad, so I transferred your mind and soul into an artificial body in the world you just experienced. ¡®Artificial body?¡¯ Oh, don¡¯t worry. It¡¯s like any other body, but I didn¡¯t have much time before the transfer so it might be a little different from your original. ¡®Ack¡­ Can you bring me back to my world?¡¯ Sorry, but there¡¯s a rule that a soul that¡¯s left a body can¡¯t inhabit another one in same world. Your original body¡¯s completely useless now anyway. It¡¯s so bad that I get nauseated looking at it. And I¡¯ve seen a lot of zombie movies. ¡®¡­But¡ª'' Ah, seems like you¡¯re going to wake up now. Good luck in the new world and have fuuuuun~! * * * I blinked twice and found myself lying down on a cot inside a green tent. ¡®What the hell¡­ was that a dream?¡¯ I got up and looked around. There were hundreds of patients lying on cots just like mine, and a few people dressed in white robes were walking around talking to them. It reminded me of an army hospital. ------------------------------------------------------------ Large Medical Tent (Capacity: 500/500) - Increases HP and MP recovery rate by 300% ------------------------------------------------------------ In the middle of the room was a floating notification window. I guess this world is similar to my world¡¯s MMORPGs. If that¡¯s the case, then¡­ ¡°Menu! Options! Status! Uh¡­ Status Window!¡± ------------------------------------------------------------ Sen Arkfield, Level 1 Race: Human | Class: None HP: 15 | MP: 15 STR: 10 | DEX: 10 | INT: 10 | WIS: 10 | LUK: 10 A completely average human being. Blessed by the Goddess Lilianna. - Large Medical Tent grants you a 300% faster HP and MP recovery rate ------------------------------------------------------------ ¡°Ha¡­ so it really is like that.¡± It also seemed that my body had fully recovered from earlier. If only something like healing magic or items existed in my old world, the cost of medical treatments would be plummet and people of all income levels would be able to live full lives without worrying about their health! I caught the attention of one of the white-robed females walking around. ¡°Excuse me, what happened to the dragon?¡± Ba-dump. Wait a second, this womanwas gorgeous! Facial features were 10/10, and although her body washidden by the robes, the subtle curves in the fabric foretold that it was 12/10! Moreover, her eyes were a rich babyblue that exuded charm, and her bright smile would be able to melt anybody¡¯s heart in the middle of a blizzard. ¡°There¡¯s nothing to worry about. The King¡¯s Personal Guard came as fast as they could and fought off the dragon bravely. What¡¯s your name? Mine¡¯s Evelyn.¡± ¡°Oh uh¡­ it¡¯s Sen. Sen Arkfield.¡± My heart was going to burst. I¡¯d been single all my life. Since I failed to get into a good university straight after high school, I had studied for the National College Placement Exam for two years while working full time at a convenience store to support my independence. To secure a stable job for the future, getting into a good university was vital Every hour of my day was spent either studying or working... but now, I truly appreciated this opportunity to explore a new life! ¡®Goddess Lily, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Until now, I had doubted you and thought that my luck was bad. But now I finally see the silver lining!¡¯ Evelyn smiled even brighter, which I didn¡¯t even know was possible. ''She''s the true goddess here!'' My eyes started burning as if they were staring at the sun itself. Evelyn gently grasped my hands and led me towards the tent exit. ¡°Come with me, Sen. Were your parents with you when the dragon came? I can try to help you find them.¡± Despite currently experiencing one of the happiest moments of my life, there was something that had bothered me until now. ¡°I-I don¡¯t have any parents here. Also, I¡¯m 21 years old... why are you treating me like a child?¡± Evelyn gave me a slightly puzzled look. ¡°Eh? You can''t be any older than 12. Are you okay, Sen?¡± Also confused, I looked at her blankly and was about to comment, but then noticed something as we passed by the washroom. I immediately froze, not recognizing the person that was reflected in the washroom mirror. Instead of my jet black hair, it had completely turned white. My eyes were a deep shade of emerald instead of my original murky brown. But more importantly, I had shrunk about 40 cm. I looked like I was 10 years old! ...It¡¯s like any other body, but I didn¡¯t have much time before the transfer so it might be a little different from your original. I was horrified as I recalled Lily¡¯s words in the dream. ¡®No way.¡¯ Unable to find an excuse to explain my situation, I decided that my best bet was to run away and collect my thoughts. ¡°A-hahahaha, that was a joke! I know where my parents are, and I can find them on my own. Thank you for your help!¡± ¡°Wait a minute¡ª¡° Pulling myself away, I dashed out the tent cursing Lily. ¡®Uuuuu¡­ My chance to be with a beautiful woman. But who would want to be with a 10 year old? I will never forget this. Lilyyyyyy!¡¯ Starving and Making Friends in the New World Gururururu. My stomach protested loudly as I roamed through the streets, helplessly exposed to the heat of the unrelenting sun. Once in a while, someone would glance over at me pitifully, probably because I was wearing clothes riddled with tears and holes. Although my body had fully recovered from the previous encounter with the dragon, my t-shirt and jeans were left in tatters. For me, however, these holes were a blessing because they offered ventilation and relief from the sweltering heat. ¡®I would kill for some Korean BBQ and ice-cold coke right now.¡¯ Drool began to form at the ends of my mouth as I imagined the sizzle of pork belly and slices of garlic over a charcoal grill. Wrapped in a fresh lettuce leaf and flavoured with a bit of hot pepper paste, it was the ultimate product of thousands of years of Korean cooking. Washed down with a can of ice-cold coke, it would truly be a tear-inducing taste of unification between historic and modern foods. Of course, I was curious as to what kinds of food there were in the new world I was in, but there was one huge problem. Money! I shuddered as I recalled begging for a free meal a few minutes ago. ... ¡°Please, ma¡¯am. I haven¡¯t eaten in over a day. Anything will do!¡± I bowed 90 degrees at the waist to demonstrate my sincerity to the restaurant owner, a fierce-looking blonde woman wearing a beige blouse. The restaurant had an old, tavern vibe to it, with wooden tables and chairs strewn about the dining area. Countless floating particles of dust were illuminated in the air by streaks of sunlight that squeezedthrough the murky windows. ¡°Sorry kid, there¡¯s no such thing as a free meal. I would hire you as a temporary waiter, but it''s probably not a good idea¡­¡± The owner looked anxiously behind her at some of her older female customers, who seemed to be whispering to each other while staring at me like hungry predators. ¡°Look that pale skin under those ragged clothes!¡± ¡°I bet he would look so cute in my son¡¯s old garments! They¡¯ve been just sitting in my basement for years after all¡­¡± ¡°Maybe if I fed him some food I could take him home?¡± A cold sweat ran down my spine as I caught a few of the women¡¯s whispers. ¡®Are there morals in this world?¡¯ ¡°I-I see, thank you for the offer, but I¡¯m fine! Sorry for the bother!¡± I hastily retreated from the restaurant. * * * ¡®Arggggg! So hungry!¡¯ In frustration, I kicked a stray pebble as hard as I could down the street. As someone who had been forcefully transported to a new world by a goddess after saving her, it was completely unfair. ¡®If this was a light novel or manga, I¡¯d probably start off the basic equipment for an adventurer and a few pieces of gold at least!¡¯ I cursed my own bad luck and continued to trudge along, wondering what to do. The only important thing I had figured out during my wandering was that I was in the capital city of Sharia, one of the nine kingdoms in the continent. At the city''s centre was a lavishly constructed marble castle where the King resided, and one could see hundreds of armed soldiers patrolling the royal grounds. The castle courtyard by itself easily spanned the size of a large residential block. Moreover, fenced in by stone walls and a tall white gate spanning 10 meters in height and width, the castle had an aura of authority and grandeur! Upon leaving the castle gates, there was a main road that stretched all the way tothe city''s northern gate. This road also served asthe city¡¯s biggest market strip! A prosperous commercial area where every item or equipment could be found! Merchants from all over the continent travelled to this spot to trade with the local residents and adventurers. However, after the dragon''s attack,there were signs of heavy reconstruction all around as labourers worked tirelessly to rebuild stalls, replace burnt walls, and lug debris away. There was significant damage as far as the eye could see. ¡®I wonder if I should ask to be hired as a labourer.¡¯ Even though my current body wouldn''t be able to do any heavy lifting, I could easily help out with repainting or assisting the workers. While pondering this possibility, I glimpsed a congregation of people gathered around a wooden sign with hundreds of sheets of paper pinned on top of one another. Curious, I maneuvered my way through the crowd and managed to emerge in front of the sign. The title of the sign said ''Questing Board''. My heart leapt with joy. Quests! They were the centrepieceof fantasy-like gamesthat led adventurerson ajourney towards becoming heroes or kings! Awide range of tasks were posted on the board that varied from demon subjugation to washing dishes, and each quest was listed under a level of difficulty of F to C. However, most of the attention in the crowd seemed to be directed towards one particular quest. Ting! --------------------------------------------- Goblin Subjugation [Rank E, Emergency KingdomQuest]. As a result of the black dragon¡¯s fierce attack on the kingdom, goblins have taken advantage of the chaos to raid merchant carts leaving and entering the city! We welcome adventurers of all classes and levels to help eliminate the goblins who have taken residence in the forest. Since the situation needs to be handled immediately, new adventurers will be given basic equipment and all meals during the quest¡¯s duration will be provided. Restrictions: None. Rewards: 100 EXP, rusty sword, adventurer¡¯s tunic, 10 gold. Would you like to accept this quest? Y / NThis tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere. ---------------------------------------------- ¡®Ohhhh. This is my chance!¡¯ Not only was it a fantastic opportunity to get my hands on equipment, but it also provided me with free meals and money to boot. Without hesitation, I accepted the quest on the HUD. ---------------------------------------------- You have accepted the quest. Please proceed to the ¡®West City Gates¡¯ for further instructions. Time until quest begins: 00:04:48. ---------------------------------------------- ¡°Keuk¡ª¡° I had less than 5 minutes remaining, and I didn¡¯t even know where west was. To my relief, a red arrow labelled ¡®West City Gates¡¯ appeared in my vision to my left. With whatever energy I had left in my body, I squeezed through the crowd and sprinted in the direction of the arrow. * * * I arrived at the gates sweating and panting profuselyjust as the mini HUD in the top right corner of my eye hit 00:00:00. About 40 people were gathered there for the quest, but save for a few soldiers clad in armor, noneof them looked impressive or confident. Some were wearing tatteredclothes like me, and others glanced hesitantly at one another with worried and slightly fearful looks. The average age of the crowd was probably around 20. One of the soldiers, presumably the commander, climbed atop a wooden crate to address the crowd. ¡°Welcome, everyone. As you know, the goblins in these parts have been quite troublesome for our city¡¯s trade recently. We need you to dispatch them as quickly as possible. Naturally, we of the Royal Army will be your commanding officers. After distributing supplies and equipment, we will head out immediately.¡± The solders began to hand out a sack and a sword to each person. ¡°If you are injured during the battle, retreat to camp and our medical team will assist you in your recovery. Also, please understand that as this is a quest of the Sharia Kingdom, all loot and drops obtained during the quest are property of the Kingdom. Anyone who disobeys will be persecuted accordingly.¡± A few murmurs of dissent were heard among the crowd, but quickly dissipated upon hearing the threat of law. A burly soldier handed me a sword and supplies while giving mea look of amusement. I didn¡¯t pay it any mind, because there were much more important matters at hand. ¡®FOOD!¡¯ My sack contained a loose tunic decorated with an emblem of a red lion sewn onto the chest pocket, two loaves of bread and a small gourd of water. Tearing into the first loaf, happiness filled my heart despite how stale and tasteless it was. I washed the first few bites down with water and laughed joyfully inside as it trickled down my parched throat. Within seconds, I had devoured the first loaf. ¡®Ah, this is what it means to be alive.¡¯ Just as I was about to consume the second, I felt a small tug on the back of my shirt. Turning around, there was a boy who looked younger than 5 years old looking at the loaf of breadhungrily. His clothes were in no better shape than mine, but I could see numerous bruises and cuts through the tears in his shirt. An internal struggle erupted in my mind between the knights of hunger and the angels of empathy. ¡®We have suffered humiliation and starvation for far too long. To avoid the dishonorof begging for food ever again, we will fight for this loaf of bread!¡¯ ¡®Dear knights, we understand your pain and we express our deepest condolences. However, please have heart for this poor boy! He has suffered just as much as you have, if notworse!¡¯ ¡®B-but¡ª¡® ¡®Will your fear of dishonor overpower your sense of justice?¡¯ ¡®Uuuuuuu¡­ Okay! Take it!¡¯ Tears streamed through the eye slits of the knights¡¯ helmets as they gave in. ¡°Fwa¡­ Okay, here you go.¡± I begrudgingly gave up the bread. The boy''seyes immediately lit up and he flasheda wide, toothygrin. Without a word, he ran towards a group of raggedly dressed children who stared at him with awe. ¡°Tch, I hope we get more food later.¡± I murmured under my breath but felt warm and fuzzy inside. Void of physical sustenance, sure, but at least it felt nice. As I tossed my t-shirt aside and slipped on the tunic provided in the sack, the commander took a spot on the wooden crate again. ¡°Everyone, please gather your belongings and follow me. We will now be heading for the goblin camp. It will be approximately six hours until we arrive.¡± The crowd of adventurers hastily picked up their swords and followed the Royal Army soldiers out of the city. * * * ¡°Identify!¡± Following suit with the other adventurers, I held up my sword and yelled ¡°Identify!¡± Ting! ---------------------------------------------- Rusty Sword ? - 3-5 damage per swing Durability: 2/5 Equipment Requirements: None A beginner¡¯s sword that¡¯s been kept in storage for way too long. ---------------------------------------------- My first thought was that it was a crappy sword. My second thought was hope that it might be a decent sword for a beginner. ¡°This is the shittiest sword I¡¯ve ever seen. What, am I supposed to f*** the goblins with this?¡± This comment came from the black haired teenager next to me. His build was lean and he was wearing the same adventurer¡¯s tunic I was. He was balancing the sword on his nose by the flat side of the blade as he walked, lazily looking forward as if he was bored. The brawny man in front of us, also wearing the tunic, turned his head and eyed the teenager amusingly. ¡°Bwahahahaha! Just be glad they¡¯re even paying us 10 gold at the end of this. Last time, they didn¡¯t even give 5, the stingy bastards!¡± ¡°Ehhhh, seriously? Adventuring sure is a pain. Wish I could just spend every day sleeping instead of having to drag my ass out here.¡± ¡°You¡¯re in the springtime of your youth! Bwahahahahaha! Don¡¯t you have any aspirations like becoming Pirate King and finding Two Piece?¡± ¡°Tch.¡± With a look of displeasure, the black haired youth didn¡¯t comment. ¡°How about you, lad?¡± The man shifted his attention to me. ¡°E-eh, I don¡¯t have any big aspirations or anything like that. I just want to help others¡­ I guess?¡± ¡®I mean, I¡¯ve never really thought about it seriously after I got to this world¡­¡¯ ¡°Fueee, I guess we know who¡¯s going to die first today.¡± The teenager glanced my way with a bored lookbefore looking up, where the sun was still blazing high in the sky. ¡°Aye, that¡¯s a dangerous attitude, lad. Take this uncle¡¯s advice and fend for yourself, you hear? Bwahahahaha!¡± No longer looking at me, the man faced forward where the outline of a forest started to appear beyond the hills in the distance. Embarrassed by my own words, I chose to stay quiet for the remainder of the hike. * * * It was approaching sunsetby the time we reached the edge of the forest. The commander raised his hand to signal the halt, and turned to face the group of weary adventurers. ¡°We¡¯ll be resting here until the sun completely sets. The goblin camp is 30 minutes away, but their range of detection is limited. However, please do not step foot into the forest no matter the circumstance.¡± Almost everybody dropped to the ground in exhaustion at the commander¡¯s statement, and started to complain amongst themselves. ¡°Man, that was some serious heat.¡± ¡°You¡¯ve got that right. I never knew carrying a sword was so tiring!¡± I, too, dropped like a stone once I heard we were taking a rest. While the others were complaining, I saw the black haired teen and brawny uncle sitting a little bit awaysfrom everyone else. Groaning about my poor legs, I got up and hobbled towards them. ¡°¡­What do you think is the best way to take down goblins?¡± ¡°Bwahaha! It¡¯s easy if you bash their heads in first. They¡¯re slippery bastards when it comes to a knife fight, but their heads are nicely wide and soft. Bwahahahaha!¡± The uncle¡¯s hearty laughs began to grow on me. ¡°Is it okay if I join you guys?¡± I asked timidly, wondering if I was intruding on their discussion. ¡°No problem! Bwahahahaha!¡± The uncle beamed while the youth looked bored. ''Knife fight... was it?'' As I took a seat on the ground, it started to dawn on me that I might haveseverely underestimated the task ahead of me, and I began to feel quite nervous. ¡°To be honest¡­ this is the first time I¡¯ve gone adventuring. I... have no idea what I¡¯m doing.¡± I hung my head while admitting this. ¡°Bwahahaha! We all have a first time, lad. Some of us do this for the glory, others do it because they have to. All you need is the strength to swing your sword and know when to run away.¡± My spirits sank even further. The closest thing to sword-fighting that I¡¯d done was swinging a badminton racket during high-school. It seemed so simple in games. Swing a few times and get experience points. But it couldn¡¯t possibly be that simple, especially after the discussion I had just heard. There was a very real possibility that I could die, and despite this I had thoughtlessly accepted an E-rank quest because it seemed so convenient at the time. Ba-dump. I also recalled the words I said during our hike. ''Help... others...'' Each word was painfully naive. Ba-dump. ¡®Help others my ass. I can¡¯t do anything except run away.¡¯ It was like this back in my original world, too. I had boldly decided that I¡¯d get into a good university and secure a well-paying job, despite having failed the National College Entrance Exam once already and not having set a definitive plan to make my decision a reality. Instead, I convinced myself that I was studying as hard as I could, while continuing to fully indulge in my hobbies and games for hours at a time every day. ¡®I haven¡¯t changed at all. I was just deluding myself.¡¯ Ba-dump. I closed my eyes as shame and sorrowenveloped my mind. Ba-dump. ¡°Tch. Grab your sword.¡± ¡°Eh?¡± I looked up blankly at the youth. He shot me a look of annoyance as he stood up. ¡°I¡¯m going to teach you the basics, since you look like you don¡¯t know how to fight. I don¡¯t know where you came from nor why you decided to come on this kind of quest, but you said you were going to help people, right? This is how you¡¯re going to do that. Grab your sword.¡± ¡°T-that was stupid of me to say. There¡¯s no way¡ª¡° ¡°Yeah, you¡¯re stupid. But weren¡¯t you the idiot who gave a child your bread even though you were starving yourself? If there¡¯s any idiot who can help people, there¡¯s no better idiot than you. The only way you can move forward is to learn and improve, isn''t it? Train every day, until you sweat blood and tears. Now, grab your sword!¡± ¡°Bwahahaha! This is a great idea!¡± ¡®I can¡­ change?¡¯ A sliver of hope entered my thoughts. ''Yes... even though I had deluded myself in the past, wasn''t there always an opportunity to change and become the person I wanted to be?This new world is my chance, isn''t it? To prove to myself that I''m not weak? I''m not going to waste my life again!'' Ishuffled to my feet and grippedmy sword with newfound heart. ¡°Yes, teacher! Thank you, teacher!¡± ¡°¡­It¡¯s Ray.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°My name, it¡¯s Ray.¡± ¡°Bwahahahaha! And I¡¯m Bricks! Let me join in on the fun!¡± ¡°Let¡¯s begin!¡± ¡°...Yes! Ray-nim!¡± The First Battle in the New World! Whoosh. As the sunset basked the land in a soft, orange glow, time seemed to slow and the world grew silent. Whoosh. The only sound that could be heard was the swinging of a single sword. Whoosh. A lone figure, casting a great shadow of the legendary warrior that he would become, trained his sword arts at the edge of a great forest. Whoosh. With dampened clothes and sweat streaming down his face, his eyes were full of¡ª *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- You have learned ¡ºCompletely Useless Slash¡»! - 100% chance to miss. - Even if, by some luck of god, you hit the intended target, damage will be reduced to 0. Popularized in the performance arts, this sword art has been passed down through generations of actors for use in live action plays. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡°¡­¡­¡± ¡°Hey¡­ you¡¯re an idiot, right? I mean, I said before that you were an idiot but this is beyond the levels of regular idiocy. Only a really hopeless idiot would gain this kind of sword skill, right? Right?¡± ¡°Bwahahaha! At least the lad can swing a sword now.¡± ¡°No, no. At this rate he¡¯s going to end up as a goblin sex slave performing ¡®sword¡¯ arts for them. Maybe we should teach him contraceptive techniques instead?¡± With Ray and Bricks as my teachers, I was determined to get stronger in this world. ¡®Don¡¯t give up! Fight!¡¯ I gritted my teeth and swung my sword for the 267th time. * * * ¡°Lads, let¡¯s dance with the goblins tonight. If we survive the fight, drinks are on me tomorrow! Bwahahaha!¡± ¡°Shhh. We¡¯re almost there.¡± Our commanding officer shot Bricks a warning look. The expedition team was divided into five combat units, each led by a Royal Army soldier. Ray, Bricks and I were assigned to the 4th unit, which was tasked with launching a sneak attack on the goblins while they were confronting the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd units. The 5th unit headed deeper into the forest to catch any goblins that would try and escape from the conflict. Hidden and in position, we could see around 30 goblins lazing around a bonfire, feasting merrily on skewered chunks of roasted meat and taking big swigs of ale from various jugs strewn about the camp. Without a trace of hair anywhere on their bodies, their faces were wrinkled and oblong, as if someone had resized an old man¡¯s head to have a 1:2 aspect ratio, and proceeded to photoshop it onto the festering body of a green dwarf. Beside the bonfire were stacks upon stacks of wooden crates, which presumably contained the stolen merchant goods. I noted that each goblin carried a small dagger in their loincloths. ¡®It feels a little cheap ambushing them, but I¡¯m not gonna complain.¡¯ Indeed; while our forces had ample time to carefully craft a clever strategy, the goblins would have only seconds to respond to our attack. The ultimate advantage in a battle! To preserve this edge, we had slipped into our spot quietly while making use of ¡®sneak powder¡¯, an item that granted basic stealth temporarily. I was glad. With pointed ears as large as half of their head in diameter, it wouldn¡¯t have surprised me if the goblins had a heightened sense of hearing. It was difficult waiting patiently though¡­ their meat skewers smelt delicious. Gururururu. ¡­ Everyone in my unit gawked at me with incredulity. ¡®Whoops.¡¯ All of the goblins quickly shuffled to their feet and grabbed their daggers, looking curiously in the direction of our unit. Thankfully, the three units on the opposite side of the goblin camp took advantage of this distractionto emerge from theirhiding spot, and charged towards the enemies from behind. ¡°Huuuuuumansss!¡± The ugliest goblin of the bunch noticed this ambush and leapt towards the nearest attacker, dextrously twisting its body to evade the untrained swings of the adventurer¡¯s sword and sinking its dagger into the abdomen of its victim. As the adventurer retreated in pain, his comrades dispatched the goblin mercilessly with simultaneous swings of eight swords. There was no way that the goblin could escape. The other goblins also leapt to confront the attackers, giving us the cue to begin our assault. Our CO gave the order. ¡°CHAAAAAAARGE!¡± ----------------------------------------------------- ¡ºCommanding Shout¡» boosts the morale of allied forces by 20% - Damage will temporarily increase by 10% ----------------------------------------------------- Roaring, our unit burst forth from the bushes. A surge of adrenaline invigorated my body and eliminated any nervousness I had. ¡®That one.¡¯Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions. I targeted a short goblin whose back was exposed as it confronted an adventurer from the front. Sensing danger, the goblin hissed and swiped widely with its dagger to disengage the adventurer, swiftly turning to face me. ¡°¡ºCompletely Useless Slash¡»!¡± The goblin instinctively put up a guard. As expected, however, I missed marvellously and a large shadow appeared behind the goblin. ¡°Nice assist! Bwahahahaha!¡± Kusha. The goblin¡¯s head was cleaved in two by a brawny man brandishing a bloody sword. *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- You have leveled up! ----------------------------------------------------- ¡°Bricks! Behind you!¡± ¡°Tch, you guys are wasting your energy yelling like that.¡± Ray appeared from behind the goblin who was preparing to backstab Bricks. Swish. A silver line appeared along its neck as the goblin¡¯s eyes widened, unable to understand why it couldn¡¯t move. The head slid off its shoulders and landed on the ground with a thud. Surrounded, the remaining 20 goblins were forced into a desperate situation, and they all came to the same conclusion. ¡®We have to break through at the weakest link!¡¯ My feet turned ice cold as all of them broke free from their assailants and charged towards me. ¡®Why me?!¡¯ I turned around to flee when all of the blood drained from my face. In front of me was a massive, troll-like goblin preparing to hit me with a club the size of a small tree. ¡®T-this must be the chief, huh.¡¯ Prior to entering the forest, the Royal Army soldiers briefed us that the camp was home to at least 31 grunt-level goblins and 1 chief goblin at level 20, who frequently took ¡®bathroom¡¯ breaks with the female goblins away from camp. The original plan was to wait until the chief showed up, but that had been royally screwed by me and my hungry stomach. ¡®Move. MOVE!¡¯ Using my willpower to force my frozen legs to move, I dodge rolled to the right, narrowly missing the incoming strike. Kapow! The force of the club smashing the ground was enough to generate a blast of wind that sent me tumbling rapidly and colliding with a tree. ¡®Ow ow ow. Get up, get up!¡¯ I had to keep moving, although I probably broke a rib or two. It was painful to breathe. Thankfully, the chief goblin¡¯s attack had also cut off the goblins¡¯ retreat path and sent many of them flying. The battle was definitely in our favor. Unfortunately, however, for some cruel reason the chief had decided that I was its prime target. Hunkering over me like a sadistic buffoon, it raised its club to deal the final blow. I couldn¡¯t get up to move out of the way. My ankle probably twisted during the tumble. Ba-dump. ¡®Is this the end? After I finally found the motivation to do something with my life, was this all that it amounted to?¡¯ Everything around me seemed to move in slow motion as I closed my eyes for the inevitable. ¡®Well, at least I found some good friends in the end.¡¯ KAPOW! ¡­ ¡­ Continuing to close my eyes, I wondered why the hit hadn¡¯t come yet. ¡°Oi, oi. Lad, are you just going to take a hit like that? Bwahahaha!¡± ¡°Tch, grow some balls already, will you?¡± ¡®?!¡¯ Ray and Bricks were holding the chief¡¯s massive club at bay with their swords. ¡®Guys!¡¯ ¡°What are you doing? Grab your sword and slay this son of a bitch!¡± Tears welled up in my eyes. ¡®Thank you¡­ truly¡­¡¯ ¡°AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!¡± I summoned every last drop of strength I had and gripped my sword with bloody hands, ignoring the throbbing pain that coursed throughout my entire body. ¡°NOW!¡± Both Ray and Bricks simultaneously increased the output of force they were applying on the club and flung it upwards, causing the chief goblin to momentarily lose balance. ¡°AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!¡± Screaming, I dashed forwards and raised my sword, pouring all of my energy into the final skill I had attained after swinging the sword 4000 times. A dark green aura erupted from my body and travelled through my arms into the sword, illuminating the blade in a brilliant green light. "¡ºArc Slash¡»!¡± Sssssssssing. A bright green line was drawn from the chief goblin¡¯s right shoulder all the way to the left side of its waist. Thud. *Ting ----------------------------------------------------- You have leveled up! You have leveled up! You have leveled up! You have leveled up! You have leveled up! You have leveled up! You have leveled up! You have leveled up! For reaching level 10, you are now able to select a class! You have leveled up! For defeating a monster at least 10 levels greater than yours, +10 ability points gained! For demonstrating tremendous willpower and strength in the face of adversity, you have gained the skill ¡ºResolute Will¡»! For defeating the chief goblin, you have gained the title ¡®Goblin Hunter¡¯! ----------------------------------------------------- * * * ¡°Ahhh, I can¡¯t wait to go home.¡± One of the adventurers commented as she stretched her arms and laid down on the grass. After the remaining goblins had been taken care of, the adventurers helped each other return to the edge of the forest to camp for the night. Bricks carried me on his back, which sucked because my broken ribs shifted a little every time he laughed with a ¡°Bwahahahaha!¡±. None of us died in the fight, but there were plenty of injured to be treated by medics. ¡®Status Window!¡¯ ----------------------------------------------------- Sene Arkfield, Level 11 Race: Human | Class: None | Title: Goblin Hunter HP: 2/70 | MP: 10/30 STR: 23 (+3) | DEX: 22 (+2) | INT: 20 | WIS: 20 | LUK: 20 - 15 additional ability points available for distribution. - Your title grants +3 STR and +2 DEX - Blessed by the Goddess Lilianna. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡®Ow ow... Hmm, I should probably ask around before I use those ability points.¡¯ Knowledgeable and proper distribution of these points were probably important. I had no idea what the blessing was for, but I was going ask Lily if she ever appeared in my dreams again. Laying me down on the ground carefully, Bricks grabbed the attention of a female medic with an arm band decorated with a green herb-like plant. The medic was wearing brown cargo pants that cut off at the knees, and I could see that each pocket was bulging with bandages, herbs and various plants of different colors. From her belt hung knives and tools of all shapes and sizes, including one that looked like a big, black pill-shaped squeeze ball. Her torso was bound at the chest by several bindings of white cloth, exposing a silky smooth stomach that could rival thatof Korea¡¯s cosmetic models. She coolly surveyed my body. ¡°Hey kid, the name¡¯s Claire. You seem to be in rough shape¡­ this should help.¡± Producing everything from her pockets like a magician, she threw a couple red and green herbs in with a handful of blue berries into a small mortar and began to crush everything together with a pestle. To my horror, she grabbed the black pill from her waist and squeezed out a cloudy, viscous liquid into the bowl as well. Unable to lift a finger, Claire applied the now murky brown paste onto my wounds with frightening speed, and bound my chest in a large bandage. ----------------------------------------------------- - 54 HP has been restored! - Bandage increases HP recovery rate by 200%! ----------------------------------------------------- The pain in my chest and legs immediately dulled, and I found that I could stand up again. ¡®This is really amazing. I wonder how these things work?¡¯ ¡°Could you teach me how to do that?¡± ¡°Ha, wait a few years and enroll in the ShariaAcademy Hospital. The training takes ten years though. Anyways--" Claire got up and headed towards another injured adventurer. ¡°Later.¡± As I watched her leave, Bricks slapped my back. Hard. ¡®Keuk¡ªI don¡¯t think my ribs are completely healed yet.¡¯ ¡°Bwahahaha! Want to become a medic now?¡± ¡°An idiot like him, a medic? Is the world going to end tomorrow?¡± A black haired teenager approached us. ¡°Ray!¡± ¡°Ugh, get that disgustingly happy look off your face. It¡¯s giving me cancer.¡± ¡°What¡¯s happening now?¡± ¡°We¡¯re all camping here for the night. Those shitty soldiers are looting the goblin camp and should be here soon. Tch, here they come.¡± The Royal Army soldiers walked out of the forest path with large carriages carrying the stolen merchant crates. Strangely, these vehicles seemed to move by themselves despite having no visible engine nor an animal to power them. When they stopped, several sets of tiny shadows jumped out of the wheels and quickly climbed to the roof of the carriage, disappearing out of sight. Upon closer inspection, I saw that the inner surface of each wheel was grooved at set intervals to allow for a powerful set of tiny legs to apply tremendous centripetal force! Yes, vehicles in this world were powered by a race called HAMsters, short for Huge-Ass-Mother****ing Monsters. In reality, individuals of this race were no bigger than 15 cm, and could easily be mistaken for their animal relatives, if not for their robust arms and thighs. They possessed high strength and ridiculous stamina, enabling a team of HAMsters to power a standard carriage for up to 24 hours! As such, they were valued highly for their transportation capabilities. All I could do, however, was wonder they would taste good fried or broiled. Gurururu. ¡°Bwahahahaha! There¡¯s the devil stomach that almost ruined the entire operation!¡± My face started to grow hot. ¡°A-all¡¯s well that ends well, right? Ahhh¡­ I¡¯m sorry.¡± I hung my head and glanced around, expecting angry glares. Surprisingly, everyone was beaming. ¡°Bring out the celebratory feast! Bwahahahaha!¡± ¡°Feast! Feast! Feast! Feast!¡± The adventurers all around began to chant and the Royal Army soldiers hastened to unload a few boxes from one of the carriages. ¡°Eh? We get to eat?¡± My eyes widened at the giant pig beingskewered and placed over the large campfire. ¡°Bwahahahaha! This is the entire reason I came. They promised us a free meal, remember? There¡¯s always a huge feast after a kingdom quest. You, soldier! Bring us three beers!¡± ¡°Kids shouldn¡¯t drink¡ª¡± Ray began to protest, but Bricks just laughed it off. ¡°A man¡¯s gotta drink when a man¡¯s gotta drink! Bwahahaha!¡± The soldier brought us three jugs of beer the size of soccer balls. ¡°Now, KUMBAE!¡± ¡°KUMBAE!!!!¡± Both adventurers and soldiers alike lifted their jugs high into the air, as the flames of the campfire danced in the night air. And just like that, my first day in the new world passed. While it was intense and all sorts of crazy things happened, I thought to myself that a life like this wasn¡¯t so bad. ¡®I wonder if this pig¡¯s going to give me diarrhea tomorrow¡­¡¯ It did. No One鈥檚 Got Time to Cook in the New World! ¡°Help me¡ªcough, cough¡ªSen¡­¡± Ray collapsed onto his knees, coughing up blood. ¡®How did this happen.¡¯ A frail, elderly man was sprawled across the floor, limp and motionless. ¡®Why.¡¯ Foam formed at the ends of Bricks'' mouth as his eyes bulged from their sockets. ¡®Make it stop.¡¯ Hands shaking, I continued to cut the tomatoes. * * * FLASHBACK BEGIN * * * Kacha. The West City Gates opened, allowing the exhausted adventurers to stumble into the city with sighs of relief. *Trring! ----------------------------------------------------- Goblin Subjugation [Rank E, Emergency Kingdom Quest] ¨C Complete. - 100 EXP earned. - 10 gold earned. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡°Bwahahaha! How does it feel, lad? The first quest is always a memorable one.¡± I gazed up at the blue sky. Going to a different world, encountering a dragon, meeting a goddess, and fighting goblins alongside comrades¡­ it all felt so surreal. There were still so many things that I still didn¡¯t understand. But, I couldn¡¯t help but grin. ¡°I feel great!¡± I had resolved to live my life to the fullest here, without regrets. ¡°Bwahahahaha!¡± ¡°Ugh, keep it down will you? Some of us have a hangover here.¡± Ray closed his eyes with a pained expression as he massaged his forehead with his palm. There were murmurs of agreement among the adventurers. Yesterday¡¯s celebratory feast had gone late into the evening, and some of the adventurers, including Ray, hadchallenged Bricks to a drinking competition. That night, the legend of the Bwahahaha drinking demon was born. * * * ¡°My Goddess. Something terrible has happened!¡± A winged messenger hurriedly arrived at the Temple of Lilianna and kneeled on the marble floor. In front of her was a divine woman of unparalleled beauty, skin radiant with a golden tan and flowing hair the color of sand. Lily''s silky white dress contoured around her body elegantly, and a golden band was wrapped around her torso just below her breasts, accentuating herdelicate curves. Shewas aggressively mashing buttons on a PS10 controller. ¡°My Goddess¡ª¡° ¡°Gimme a second!¡± ¡°But my Goddess¡ª¡° ¡°ARGGGGG, why in the world did the developers make it so that the final piece for the ultimate weapon is won through a bird race mini-game? Mind you, a bird race that is ONLY winnable if you do it perfectly?!¡± ¡°¡­¡± ¡°Fueeee. So what did you want, Alex?¡± ¡°The Festival of the Gods is tomorrow, but the hired event organizer forgot to make dinner plans!¡± ¡°So?¡± ¡°So, as the Goddess of Food and Leisure, please help us.¡± ¡°¡­¡± ¡°¡­I¡¯ll help you beat the bird race.¡± ¡°Deal.¡± ¡°¡­¡­¡± * * * ¡°¡­Eh? You¡¯re a blacksmith, Bricks?¡± ¡°Bwahahaha! Didn¡¯t I mention it before? I have to head back to the workshop, but you lads can come visit me anytime. I¡¯ll give you some good deals.¡± After giving us a warm, crushing bear hug (which Ray desperately tried to avoid) and directions to his workshop, Bricks departed with a wave. Yawning, Ray watched Bricks¡¯ withdrawing figure. ¡°Hey Sen, what are your plans? You mentioned that you¡¯re from an eastern continent across the sea, right?¡± ¡°Y-yeah¡­ I¡¯m not really sure, to be honest. Everything¡¯s been so hectic since I came here that I haven¡¯t had a chance to think about it.¡± ¡®I suppose I should probably look for a class, since I¡¯ve reached level 10. Maybe if I¡¯m lucky, I¡¯ll find a special or hidden class? Ohhh, what if I get a hero class?!¡¯ The idea was electrifying. ¡°Hmm. From that stupid look of yours, I bet you¡¯re going to look for a class without even knowing where to go. An idiot like you will probably fall for that scam asking you to buy an expensive magic potion to get the ¡®Hero¡¯ or ¡®Pirate King¡¯ class, and end up becoming a debt-bound s*x slave for some duke somewhere.¡±Love what you''re reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on. ¡°H-haha¡­hahahaha, no I wouldn¡¯t!¡± ¡®I probably would.¡¯ Ray sighed. ¡°Actually, I have something to ask you. Would you like to work with me? I run a freelance questing business and I could use a partner these days. Solo questing¡¯s not as profitable as it used to be.¡± ¡°I-I¡¯d probably just bring you down though.¡± ¡°Tch, stop it with that crap and say yes. I know you want to.¡± ¡°¡­Ray!¡± ¡°Stop that too. I¡¯m getting goosebumps.¡± * * * ¡°Oi gramps, I¡¯m back.¡± ¡°Heh, you¡¯ve got some nerve showing your face again, boy. Your rent¡¯s late by 3 months.¡± We entered a small, dilapidated bar, a stark contrast to the vibrant commercial district that we were just in. The wooden floor creaked as we walked towards the dimly lit counter. If I were to describe the place, it would be ¡®eerie as f***¡¯. Two empty booths occupied the lobby, and a collection of old, dusty bottles sat on the tables with red liquid dripping out of one that tipped over. At the back wall was a rickety shelf that held all sorts of colorful jars of various shapes and sizes, like the ones used to trap ghosts in the movies. To top it off, a ghoul-like elderly man sat on one of the counter stools with a mischievous grin on his face and one arm propped on the counter, matching the bar¡¯s creepy atmosphere perfectly. I would have passed him off for an undead, if not for his piercing blue eyes that were full of life. Ray looked at him quizzically. ¡°Ah? I paid you last week.¡± ¡°That only covered the previous 3 months of rent you didn¡¯t pay me. You still owe me 3 months worth.¡± ¡°Tch, so stingy. I¡¯ve got a promising new hire, so we¡¯ll be able to get something for you soon.¡± Ray motioned at me with his thumb. The old man eyed me curiously. ¡°I¡¯m Brann, the owner of this bar. What¡¯s your name, boy?¡± ¡°S-sen, sir.¡± ¡°Hahahaha, ¡®sir¡¯ you say! Boy, I like your attitude a lot more than that useless buffoon over there who can¡¯t even pay his rent on time.¡± Brann¡¯s laugh raised a small cloud of dust from the counter. Ray glared. ¡°Tch, shut up you damn geezer.¡± ¡°Hahaha!¡± ¡®I wonder what their relationship is¡­¡¯ Despite the insults and name-calling, their words didn¡¯t seem hostile at all. Sighing, Ray dropped 5 gold coins on the counter and walked towards the door at the back of the room, motioning for me to follow. ¡°Consider this a down payment for that rent. Also, get us some food, will you?¡± ¡°You got it. Two regulars coming right up.¡± Ray stepped through the door, and Brann walked to the back of the counter to prepare something that I couldn¡¯t see. I rushed to catch up to Ray, but Brann caught me with a serious look before I could leave. ¡°Take care of him, won¡¯t you?¡± Confused, I nodded and went through the back door. ¡®Ray seems perfectly capable of taking care of himself though.¡¯ From the back room, a set of stairs led up to Ray¡¯s office. It was a completely different atmosphere than the bar below. A wide open room that looked out into the city from a balcony! Both the Western District and castle were visible from here. The floors of the office were hardwood and the walls were a greyish white. Numerous shelves and cabinets lined these walls. Four three-seater sofas, all of which could be reclined to become queen-sized beds, were placed along edges of a large, square table. The office gave off a surprisingly modern vibe, but I wasn¡¯t complaining. I threw myself onto a sofa, comforted by the smell of leather that reminded me of home. ¡°Let¡¯s rest here for a while and head out in the afternoon. I¡¯ll help you find a class so that you¡¯ll be more useful for our work.¡± Ray jumped onto the sofa opposite the central table, placing his hands behind his head. I wholeheartedly agreed to this plan. ¡®This might be a good time to ask him some questions about this world.¡¯ ¡°Say¡­ can I ask you a few questions?¡± ¡°¡­¡± ¡°Ray?¡± I glanced over, and saw a balloon-sized snot bubble extending from Ray¡¯s nose, inflating and deflating with every breath. ¡®He fell asleep instantly!¡¯ * * * After eating the lunch Brann made for us, Ray and I headed towards the Adventurer¡¯s Hall for my class aptitude test. According to Ray, the test would calculate the best possible class based on my talents and latent potential using a complex algorithm only understood by the Gods. Moreover, it would be best for me to allocate my extra ability points after I selected a class, since different classes would benefit from different attributes. ¡°For example, a warrior-type class would benefit most from STR and DEX, while a mage-type would be best improving INT and WIS.¡± ¡°What¡¯s your class, Ray?¡± ¡°I¡¯m a Magic Swordsman. Ah, we¡¯re here.¡± My first impression of the Adventurer¡¯s Hall was¡­ ¡®Huge!¡¯ From the outside, it looked more like a small castle than a building. The door itself was at least 15 meters high and 10 meters wide, and on either side of the doors were large, yellow banners that exhibited the same red lion emblem that was sewn on our tunics. Fwoosh! With a small push, the doors flung open wide. ¡°Whoooooaaa!¡± An open space atrium larger than the main chapel of a cathedral was visible from the entrance. On the first floor, thousands of adventurers of various races were gathered, some looking for new party members and others discussing high rank quests. The second floor was a large balcony that stretched from the left side of the room to the right in the shape of a U, and seemed to be a socializing area that had tables set up so that adventurers could leisurely chat and eat while watching the people below. The entire back wall was a magic circle with a giant HUD displaying all sorts of quests. Unlike the quest board that I had seen before which only went to C rank difficulty, this HUD had quests ranging all the way to A, as well as some that were even listed as S or SS. Ignoring my gaping mouth, Ray walked me over to the left side of the atrium where there were semi-windowed terminals through which adventurers could talk with an administrator. ¡°Heya, this guy needs to do a class aptitude test.¡± Ray motioned to me. The administrator, a busty and brunette elf woman wearing pointed glasses, nodded. ¡°Certainly. That will be 2 gold. Please step forward, new adventurer.¡± I approached the terminal and shelled out the gold. ¡°Good. Now, please swallow this pill and do NOT chew. It will feel unpleasant for a moment, but it won¡¯t hurt. Your test results should be sent directly to you via HUD.¡± The administrator handed me a pill that looked like one of those booger-flavoured jelly beans that your friends give you as a prank. Despite its weird appearance, I took it. Nothing happened for a while. ¡®?!¡¯ Suddenly, my brain felt as if it was being prodded by a slimy tendril, which then squirmed its way inside as if to nest itself in there. It seemed to be sapping my energy as well, but I bore throughit. ¡®I want a good class!¡¯ *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- Aptitude Test Results: Sen Arkfield, Level 12 - Recommended Class: Hobo Would you like to change to this class? Y / N ----------------------------------------------------- ¡°¡­¡­¡­¡­¡­..¡± ¡®Hobo.¡¯ The word echoed in my head. ''Hobo... Hobo... Hobo....'' I felt like I was falling into an abyss. Falling¡­ Falling¡­¡­ Falling¡­¡­¡­. ----------------------------------------------------- Splat ----------------------------------------------------- ¡®Splat?¡¯ ----------------------------------------------------- Teehee~ I was just fooling around! xP. Did you miss me? I¡¯ll give you a great class, but in exchange, you have to do something for me! - Goddess Lily ----------------------------------------------------- ¡®I respectfully decline!¡¯ *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- You have become eligible to obtain the hidden class: ¡®World Chef¡¯. Would you like to change to this class? Y / N You are unable to refuse due to Goddess Liliana¡¯s intervention. Congratulations! You have attained the hidden class ¡®World Chef¡¯. Your stats have been redistributed. You have gained the stat ¡®Flavour¡¯! Please view Status Window for further details. You have learned ¡ºCooking Blade¡». ¡ºResolute Will¡»has changed to ¡ºChef¡¯s Resolve¡». Please view Skill Window for further details. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡®¡­¡¯ ¡°What class did you get?¡± ¡°¡­a cook.¡± ¡°¡­¡± *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- Dinner Plans for the Festival of the Gods [Rank C, Emergency Goddess Quest] The Festival of the Gods is a gathering of the heavenly beings to celebrate the creation of the world. Unfortunately, an emergency in the Heavenly Realms necessitates a brave chef to make enough food for 250 Gods and Goddesses by tomorrow morning! Goddess Lilianna will grant you a temporary skill for the duration of this quest. Requirements: Class - World Chef Temporary Skill: ¡ºCreate Ingredients¡» - Allows the user to summon an unlimited amount of any ingredient - Leftover ingredients will disappear upon the quest¡¯s completion Rewards: - Hidden Class - World Chef (Already granted) - 4000 EXP - 1000 Gold Would you like to accept the quest? Y / N You are unable to refuse due to Goddess Liliana¡¯s intervention. Quest accepted! You have learned ¡ºCreate Ingredients¡»! ----------------------------------------------------- To Be Continued¡­ No One鈥檚 Got Time to Cook in the New World! (Part 2) Summary of the previous chapter: A crisis has befallen the Heavenly Realm. The Festival of the Gods is left without a dinner menu! Fulfilling her role as Goddess of Food and Leisure, the beautiful and generous Lily bestows a powerful class onto our heroic protagonist, Sen Arkfield, who is determined to save the day by cooking¡ª ¡®Who¡¯s determined to do what now? Don¡¯t go deciding that on your own, you selfish Goddess!¡¯ ¡­ *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- Dinner Plans for the Festival of the Gods - Quest Information Updated! Penalties Upon Quest Failure: - Death by Chinese Water Torture. - Ah, your friend will probably die too. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡®Keuk¡ª¡® ¡°Curse you, Lily!!!!!!!¡± With a deep breath, I began to explain the situation to Ray. * * * ¡°¡­And so, that¡¯s what''s going on.¡± Ray and I were sitting at a table on the second floor balcony of the Adventurer¡¯s Hall with dark expressions on our faces. I tried to be optimistic. ¡°O-on the bright side, if we complete this quest we can celebrate all we want with that 1000 gold.¡± ¡°¡­¡± ¡°A-and we can probably cover the rent too.¡± ¡°Do you know how to cook?¡± ¡°......No.¡± There was a long pause as we contemplated the meaning of life, the universe, and everything. Was there some way that we could use the power of 42 to destroy that Goddess and restore balance to the world? ¡°Well, it was nice knowing you, Sen.¡± Ray casually got up from his chair and started to walk away. Before he made it two steps, I latched onto his arm with tears streaming down my face. ¡°Ray, don¡¯t leave me, I don¡¯t want to die! You¡¯ll die too if we don¡¯t do this!¡± He tried to pry me away using his foot, but I clung on desperately. ¡°I¡¯m not spending the last day of my life cooking with an idiot! Let me go, I need to experience manhood at least once before I die!¡± ¡°Bwahahaha! What¡¯s going on with you lads?¡± A friendly figure walked up the stairs onto the second floor. No longer wearing the adventurer¡¯s tunic, he was dressed in a dark-grey linen shirt with a black apron overtop. ¡°Bricks! Why are you here?¡± ¡°I came to pick up some smithing requests, bwahaha! Work¡¯s slowed down since the morning. Can I help you lads with anything?¡± ¡°You came at a great time. Let me tell you about our predicament¡­¡° And so, I recounted everything that had happened since we came to the Hall. The number of people at our table with darkened expressions increased by one. ¡­ Bricks was the one to break the silence. ¡°Lad, check your status and skill windows. Maybe there¡¯s something that can help you.¡± ¡®Ah, right. Status Window. Skill Window.¡¯ ----------------------------------------------------- Sene Arkfield, Level 11 Race: Human | Class: World Chef | Title: Goblin Hunter HP: 55/55 | MP: 125/125 | FLV: 0 STR: 18 (+3) | DEX: 82 (+2) | INT: 80 | WIS: 15 | LUK: 15 - FLV (flavour) is gained through cooking delicious meals. It improves the taste of your food relative to how high this stat is. - Your title grants +3 STR and +2 DEX. - Blessed by the Goddess Lilianna. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡ºCompletely Useless Slash¡» [Active ¨C No MP] - A complete waste of space on the skill list. ¡ºArc Slash¡» [Active ¨C Special MP] - A powerful slash created by stubbornly swinging a sword without rest. In exchange for all of the user¡¯s remaining mana, increases output exponentially. ¡ºCooking Blade¡»[Active ¨C 20 MP] - The blade of a chef is said to be sharp enough to split the ocean. This technique allows you to cut any ingredient. ¡ºChef¡¯s Resolve¡»[Passive] - Anything you cook with all of your heart and soul will taste delicious. It has to! ¡ºCreate Ingredients¡»[Active ¨C Unlimited Uses During Quest] - A godly technique that allows for the acquisition of ingredients without actually having to go get them. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡°¡ºCreate Ingredients¡»¡­ is it? Do either of you guys know what Gods and Goddesses eat?¡± ¡°Tch, how would I know?¡± ¡°Wouldn¡¯t it be okay if you made anything? Bwahahaha!¡± ¡°Eh, then could this actually just be an easy quest? I can just create a bunch of fresh vegetables and throw it together like a salad, right?¡± ¡°Ohh, you¡¯re right, hahaha!¡± ¡°Right? Bwahahaha!¡± The atmosphere lightened and the three of us laughed loudly, attracting the stares of other people in our vicinity. ¡°Huhu~ I couldn¡¯t help but overhear your interesting conversation. I don¡¯t mean to be a thorn in your side, but you guys are completely wrong.¡± ¡®Who?¡¯ The angelic voice came from a lady robed in white, whose gorgeous facial features looked very familiar. Those baby blue eyes! That bright smile that melts your heart! Evelyn, my true goddess had descended! She had taken care of me yesterday in the medical tent after the dragon attack. With that white robe she was wearing, she was probably some sort of healer, pure at heart and kind to a fault. ¡°Oh Ray baby~ Why did you run away that other night? Did this older sister do anything to scare you?¡± ¡®EH?¡¯ Mouse agape, I slowly turned my head to look at Ray, who was scowling at her. ¡°Tch, annoying.¡±Unlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon. ¡°U-uunnnn~ As always, yourcold, emotionless eyes are the best <3!¡± Hey, hey, I swear I just saw a ¡®<3¡¯ physically come out from her mouth just now. "Go away, you perv." ¡°Ahnnn~ this kind of play is good too¡­¡± Her breathing noticeably quickened and I could feel my face growing red at her sexy expression. ¡®T-this isn¡¯t right. This shouldn¡¯t be happening! Give me back my pure goddess!¡¯ I decided to interject. ¡°W-what did you mean that we¡¯re completely wrong?¡± ¡°Mmm right, ahem¡ª¡° Evelyn seemed to collect herself a little bit. ¡°It¡¯s common knowledge among us priestesses that Gods and Goddesses only consume one thing during the Festival of the Gods. Born in the core of a volcano in a distant land and protected in an almost divine grade protective shell, it is said that this meat is the jewel of meats¡­ the king of kings! The only people to have said to been able to acquire this enigma are emperors and legendary adventurers level 6000 and above. Yes. They are none other than¡­ the DRAGON BALLS!¡± Is she a magician? She¡¯s a magician, right? I swear I just saw lightning flash behind her at the last statement. ¡±The cooking method has been said to be lost for centuries, but luckily for you boys, I have it all up here due to a divine prophesy.¡± Evelyn pointed at her head. ¡°Ray baby~ If you go on a date with me later today¡ª¡° ¡°Rejected.¡± ¡°Ahn?~ But don¡¯t you¡ª¡° ¡°Absolutely not.¡± ¡°Fueeeee¡­¡± I took this moment to interject. ¡°M-miss Evelyn, would you please teach me the cooking method? I would be in your debt once more.¡± It seemed she had recognized me from yesterday, because her eyes widened slightly. ¡°You are¡­¡± * * * About an hour later, Ray, Bricks, Evelyn, and I stood inside Brann¡¯s old bar with fierce eyes. Bricks came to help out, and Evelyn was determined to save her beloved ¡®Ray baby¡¯. Ray and I had our lives on the line. It was decided that Ray and Bricks would assist in the cooking, while Evelyn would guide it and I would follow her instructions as acting chef. Upon hearing that he might get a chance to taste Dragon Balls, Brann willingly let us use his kitchen, and even volunteered to be the first taster. A cool breeze made its way into the bar as I raised my arms. ¡°¡ºCreate Ingredients¡», DRAGON BALLS!¡± From the center of the bar, a small, yellow magic circle appeared and grew at a frightening velocity. It then expanded vertically, forming hundreds of layers of circles and lines arranged in a complex, 3D cylinder. Countless illegible symbols and characters floated within and pulsated with light. Suuuuuuuuu. With a blinding flash, the magic circle disappeared, replaced with two mini-cooper-sized, scaly, black, pear-shaped balls that were attached at the apex like a pair of cherries. It almost looked like¡ª ¡®¡­Ah, I see now. Testicles. These are literally Dragon Testicles.¡¯ ¡°Now Sen, use whatever broken chef skill you have to peel the scales off the Dragon Balls.¡± I did as Evelyn instructed using ¡ºCooking Blade¡». With Brann¡¯s kitchen knife augmented with my skill, the scales cut like butter despite being only second in hardness to diamond, and soon we were able to peel them off the steaming flesh underneath. All of the men in the room subconsciously grabbed their own balls as if to check if they were intact. A sweet, sickly aroma filled the room as the true dragon balls were revealed. Inside the perfect jello-like spheres of glowing orange, there were hundreds of winged tadpole-like creatures wriggling around while using their wings to propel them forward. Dragon Essence! Brann lit the stove and produced four large woks as I raised my arms for the second time. ¡°¡ºCreate Ingredients¡», Tomatoes, Onions, Garlic, Basil, Parsley, Sugar, Salt, Black Pepper!¡± The counter was suddenly overcrowded with vegetables and spices that almost reached the ceiling. A few of them tumbled onto the ground. I understood from Evelyn¡¯s instructions what we were making. It was a popular dish in the western culture, although I didn¡¯t have much care for it myself. I was more of a rice person. Spaghetti and Meatballs! Evelyn told me to cut the vegetables while instructing the other men to fish the Dragon Essence out of the Dragon Balls. The wings and tail of the squirming Dragon Essence could be chopped off and served raw as the garnish and noodles respectively, while the head could be grilled into juicy meatballs. What they didn¡¯t expect, however¡­ * * * FLASHBACK END * * * ¡°Help me¡ªcough, cough¡ªSen¡­¡± Ray collapsed onto his knees, coughing up blood. ¡®How did this happen.¡¯ A frail, elderly man was sprawled across the floor, limp and motionless. ¡®Why.¡¯ Foam formed at the ends of Bricks'' mouth as his eyes bulged from their sockets. ¡®Make it stop.¡¯ Hands shaking, I continued to cut the tomatoes. Hundreds of the violent Dragon Essence were flying in the air watching me without moving, as if they were mesmerized by the slow chopping motion of my kitchen knife. *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- Through repetitive cutting, you have learned the skill ¡ºMesmerizing Cooking¡»! - Charms those watching you cook. Charmed monsters are immobilized while the skill is active. ----------------------------------------------------- Evelyn frantically monopolized on this opportunity to cast healing spells on the three fallen men who had been defeated by the Dragon Essence. ¡®What should we do? These things are no joke¡­¡¯ Not only was it impossible to cut through the Dragon Essence skin, but they were also terrifyingly strong with an individual level of 40. They seemed to attack by squirting a high-speed blob of white goop that exploded on impact. To make things worse, a single puncture of the Dragon Balls had caused every single Dragon Essence to escape at once, leaving behind a steaming ball of orange jello. It was a terrifying scene as hundreds of the worm-like creatures squirmed through a tiny gap to escape. I could use ¡ºCooking Blade¡» to dismember a couple of the Essences with the mana I had left, but I didn¡¯t have enough to cut through all of them. Moreover, if I stopped cooking, the squirming bastards would no doubt be broken from their trance and turn violent again. Stopped cooking¡­ stopped cooking¡­ Wait, if I was using ¡ºCooking Blade¡», wouldn¡¯t it count as cooking? Even so, it was impossible to keep it up with my mana regeneration rate. I seemed to recover 1 MP every 5 seconds with my improved INT stat, which meant that I needed to increase my regeneration rate by at least a hundred-fold to kill them all. Unless¡­ To test my theory, I grabbed a fresh tomato and began to peel the skin off while approaching the nearest enemy. ¡°¡ºCooking Blade¡»!¡± I immediately returned to peeling my tomato after slicing off the tail and wings of the Dragon Essence in one fluid motion, breathing a sigh of relief when the others didn¡¯t start bombarding me with attacks. ¡®It works!¡¯ ¡ºCooking Blade¡»only used 20 MP, which meant that I was able to use it once every 100 seconds. There were about 400 Dragon Essences that had been freed from the Dragon Balls, which meant that it would take me approximately 40000 seconds to beat them all, or just about 11 hours in total. I grimaced after doing the calculations in my head, but there was nothing to be done. Proceeding in this fashion, I cut down the Dragon Essences one by one while peeling and dicing the tomatoes and onions. Upon recovering, Ray and Brann began to stir-fry the dismembered essence heads with the vegetables and spices. Bricks brought out his smithing hammer and made the tomato sauce by crushing them to bits and then simmering them over medium heat. Evelyn helped prepare 250 plates of noodles and garnish, and even had to run to nearby shops to purchase more plates as the bar didn¡¯t have enough. *Ting! ----------------------------------------------------- You have cooked a plate of ¡®Dragon Semen¡¯! - +55 FLV Truly, a legendary dish that is worthy of the Gods and Goddesses of the Heavenly Realm. ----------------------------------------------------- You have cooked a plate of ¡®Dragon Semen¡¯! - +55 FLV ----------------------------------------------------- You have cooked a plate of ¡®Dragon Semen¡¯! - +55 FLV ----------------------------------------------------- Sweat glistened on our foreheads as we worked. Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate, add sauce and vegetables, garnish with wings. This repetitive process continued late into the night without any breaks, because a single moment of hesitation could spell death. * * * ¡°Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate, add sauce and vegetables, garnish with wings. Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate, add sauce and vegetables, garnish with wings. Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate, add sauce and vegetables, garnish with wings. Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate, add sauce and vegetables, garnish with wings¡­¡± As the sun began to rise above the horizon, passerbys of Brann¡¯s bar would quicken their pace upon hearing a strange chant that permeated the walls. Moreover, a sickly aroma wafted through the windows, and accusatory rumors would spread like wildfire throughout the day regarding the shady nature of this bar. *Trrrring! ----------------------------------------------------- Dinner Plans for the Festival of the Gods [Rank C, Emergency Goddess Quest] - Complete. - 4000 EXP earned. - You have leveled up! - You have leveled up! - You have leveled up! ¡­ - 1000 gold earned. - For having over 1000 FLV, you have attained the title ¡®Novice Foodie¡¯. - For having over 2000 FLV, you have attained the title ¡®Basic Foodie¡¯. - For having over 5000 FLV, you have attained the title ¡®Hopeless Foodie¡¯. - For having over 10000 FLV, you have attained the title ¡®Orgasmic Foodie¡¯. - ¡ºCreate Ingredients¡» has been revoked due to completion of the quest. ----------------------------------------------------- ¡°Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate, add sauce and vegetables, garnish with wings. Peel, slice, ¡ºCooking Blade¡», stir-fry, make sauce, put tails on plate¡ª¡° ¡°Sen. Seeeeen. Sen!¡± Evelyn shook me by the shoulders, snapping me out of my trance. The 250 plates of spaghetti were gone, as were the leftover ingredients and Dragon Balls. The men were out cold on the wooden floor. ¡°¡­Is it finally¡­ over?¡± ¡°Seems like it. Good work!¡± She beamed as she ruffled my hair, and I could feel my face grow warmer. ¡®Ah¡­ if only she was always like this¡­¡¯ Pouncing on the KO-ed Ray, she gave a loud ¡°Kyaaaaa, Ray baby~¡±, upon which a leg shot out and kicked her flying out the bar door. ¡°Tch. So loud and annoying. Lemme sleep.¡± ¡°Bwahahaha! It¡¯s good to be young!¡± Bricks looked at the ceiling with a wide hearty grin. Brann, however, looked defeated. ¡°Fueee¡­. I didn¡¯t get to taste those magnificent Dragon Balls after all.¡± ¡°Oi geezer, did you really want to eat that thing? Just go to a gentleman¡¯s bar if you¡¯re that interested.¡± ¡°Hah? You¡¯re fifty years too young to say that kind of thing to me. Learn your place, you parasitic child. Better yet, move out as soon as possible and learn how to pay your rent on time in the real world.¡± ¡°Tch, we¡¯ve got enough to pay your damn rent, you old sack of potatoes. Right, Sen?¡± ¡°Pfft.¡± ¡°Sen?¡± ¡°Pff-hahahahahaha!¡± ¡°Oi, oi, I think he¡¯s finally gone crazy.¡± ¡°Hahahaha¡ªsorry¡ªhaha¡­ I¡¯m just glad I have such good friends like you guys.¡± I plopped to the ground with a little puff of dust and laid back, arms and legs stretched out. ¡°You know? I was scared and lonely when I first got here. I didn¡¯t know what to do or where to go, and there seemed to be trouble everywhere I went.¡± I gave a little chuckle at the memory of drunk Ray collapsing during the celebratory feast and Bricks laughing behind him with a victorious pose. ¡°But you guys helped me through it all, thick and thin, even if we didn¡¯t know each other very well. I can¡¯t thank you all enough for what you¡¯ve done for me.¡° I reached for the ceiling with one of my hands and clenched it into a fist. ¡°I¡¯ll do my best to become stronger and help you too.¡± ¡°Idiot, why are you going all sentimental on us now? We¡¯re already brothers, aren¡¯t we?¡± ¡°Bwahaha! He¡¯s right, lad. It¡¯s the morning, but what say we head over to the bar and have a celebratory drink among brothers? It¡¯s on you today! Bwahahaha!¡± ¡°Tch. What a pain in the ass, I want to sleep.¡± ¡°Bwahahaha! Don¡¯t be a little baby, real men prioritize drink over sleep.¡± Bricks got up and lifted Ray in a shoulder-carry, walking towards the door. ¡°Boy, let¡¯s go!¡± ¡°Ray baby~ I¡¯m going too! <3¡± Shuffling to my feet, I could feel a warm, comfy feeling spreading in my chest. With these guys, I truly felt at home. ¡°Coming!¡± * * * ¡®That ¡ºCreate Ingredients¡» technique was really useful though¡­ I wonder if I¡¯ll ever get a power like that. I can¡¯t believe that it can just materialize ingredients out of thin air.¡¯ A certain black dragon in a distant land cried that night. Who Says a Cardboard Box Cant Be a Home in the New World? Ratatatata. The metal cage secured to a large wagon rattled as it rolled through the North City Gates. It was merely one of the thousands of vehicles that passed these gates into the capital city every day, but the thick, green drapes over the cage aroused the suspicion of the Royal Army guards. ¡°Halt!¡± A pair of small fox ears weakly perked up at the soldier¡¯s command. It had been several days since the caravan had left the previous town, and the little fox girl inside had not heard a single voice aside her captors¡¯ since then. She felt a tingle of hope when the drape was pulled off, but that quickly turned to pain whenshe was blinded by sunlight, having been in the dark for so long. After a few seconds, a husky voice shouted from atop the gate. ¡°Is there a problem down there?¡± ¡°No sir! It appears to be an import of chickens, sir!¡± Blinking rapidly to readjust to the brightness, the girl could barely make out the outline of a soldier inspecting the chickens in the metal cage, but she could only do so through the slits between the wooden boards of the wagon¡¯s fake floor. ¡®Help me! I¡¯m inside the wagon!¡¯ She wanted to scream, but her parched throat was unable to make a sound. She wanted to bang on the walls, but there wasn''t enough energy left in her arms. Helpless, all the girl could do was let her tears fall silently as the darkness fell once again. * * * A couple days had passed since we placated that selfish Goddess of mine and finished the rank C quest. Inspired by our night of incessant cooking, Bricks went back to his workshop to make cooking utensils and equipment, and has been busy profiting ever since. Evelyn, on the other hand, returned to the Church to resume her roles as a priestess. I had hoped that it wouldn¡¯t be long before I got to see her again, but I didn¡¯t have to worry. She attempted to sneak into the office every night to see her ¡®Ray baby¡¯. As for Ray and I, we were able to pay off outstanding rent for the office with the quest rewards, leaving us to split the 900 gold we had left over after the wild celebration we had at the local tavern. Blessed with the small fortune of 450 gold each, Ray decided to put our questing business on hold for a short while. I didn¡¯t really mind, because it gave me a chance to finally sit down and understand this world a bit better. I was currently in the Great Library reading a book called ¡°Sharia for Idiots¡±. ¡®¡­Sharia is a southern kingdom of the seventh continent, bordered by the Kingdom of Moraine to the West, the Dalarian Empire to the East and North, and the Naros Sea to the south... Its origins are unknown, but it is clear that the kingdom began at the capital city, Hespharia, a large coastal city that has boasted some of the greatest economic successes of this century¡­ The current king is His Majesty Travis Luther Nvisolt II, who inherited the throne from his father, the late King Travis Luther Nvisolt I. ¡­To the west of Hespharia is the Great Elduin Forest, beyond which lies the great city of learning and research, Ellanoire, which boasts a population and level of cultural development on par with that of the capital. To the north and east of the capital are primarily farmland and forest¡­ smaller cities and villages are littered about the countryside like tumors... a great mountain ridge separates the Kingdom of Sharia from the Dalarian Empire.¡¯ This made it clear that the world I was in was just as big, if not bigger, than my original world. Excited about the prospect of adventuring around the world at some point, I made some stat allocations on my status window. ----------------------------------------------------- Sene Arkfield, Level 25 Race: Human | Class: World Chef | Title: Orgasmic Foodie HP: 240/240 | MP: 450/450 | FLV: 13885 STR: 25 | DEX: 130 (20) | INT: 130 (20) | WIS: 15 | LUK: 15 - FLV (flavour) is gained through cooking delicious meals. It improves the taste of your food relative to how high this stat is. - Your title grants +20 DEX, +20 INT. - Your title grants your cooking 0.00001% chance to induce an orgasm. - Blessed by the Goddess Lilianna. ----------------------------------------------------- With the completion of the rank C quest, I had gained an astonishing amount of 14 levels. I couldn¡¯t tell if level 25 was decent or not, but I did discover the command ¡®analyze x¡¯ late last night, which would allow me to see the level of people and monsters from now on.Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more. I distributed my ability points with an emphasis on DEX and INT, which were obviously the key stats associated with my class, and added an extra 10 STR because of Ray¡¯s explanation for attribute: STR (Strength): Raw physical power. Increases HP. Affects attack damage, deadlifting ability, sexual endurance, etc¡­ DEX (Dexterity): Agility and manipulation of limbs. Affects precision, accuracy, attack rate, running speed, etc¡­ INT (Intelligence): Ability to use mana. Increases MP. Does not actually affect intelligence. A stupid person will still remain a stupid person. Affects magic damage, casting range, etc¡­ WIS (Wisdom): Ability to manipulate mana. Affects magic casting rate, magic amplification, etc¡­ LUK (Luck): Ability to cheat the system. Affects critical attack chance, spells with % effects, etc¡­ Moreover, with the new influx of titles I gained as a chef, I was able to freely choose what title I wanted to use by commanding the HUD with my thoughts. Despite having such an embarrassing name, ¡®Orgasmic Foodie¡¯ gave the highest stats. The major drawback was that it also gave me an effect that I seriously didn¡¯t want to have happen. Just imagining accidentally causing Brann or Bricks to have a¡­ ¡­ I shuddered, solemnly swearing never to cook for another male. ¡®Now that I have a job and class, I should probably think about getting my own place¡­¡¯ For two days, I had slept in the office with Ray. The sofas were surprisingly comfortable, and I felt safe. Evelyn¡¯s midnight ambushes were always prevented, made sure by hundreds of makeshift mines that were planted on the balcony floor. There was even a decent washroom complete with a bathtub, flushing toilet, and a booby-trapped window with steel reinforced bars. The closet was wide and spacious, perfect for storing clothing and equipment, and set to explode upon encountering Evelyn¡¯s heat signature. As hospitable and accommodating as Ray was, I absolutely did not want to overstay my welcome. ¡®I should go check out some homes at the real estate agency that Bricks told me about yesterday.¡¯ * * * Flames licked the walls of her room as smoke filled her tiny lungs. Screaming filled the air, and it took the child a few seconds to realize that it was her mouth that was doing so. As the house groaned, a sharp crack appeared in the support beams above. In the corner of an eye, there was a rush of movement and a familiar scent of Lilacs that calmed her, if but for a moment. The window shattered into a thousand shards of glistening rubies. The child sputtered as she saw them cut her mother¡¯s face and felt a mist disperse onto her own. Streaks of moonlight illuminated the beautiful face of the woman whom she loved and who loved her. The warmth of her body dulled the chilling screams around her. Crackling tinder of the village homes overlaid with the shrieks of banshees and the clings and clangs of metal. Ssssssssing. A thin, black metal erupted from her mother¡¯s bosom as the child¡¯s eyes grew wide. Kind eyes looked down, as if to tell the child that everything was okay. As the mother and child collapsed, the village was bathed in a sea of fire, and the true monster stood, staring at the child with frozen eyes of grey. A new, stronger scream was heard. AHHHHHH¡ª ¡°AHHHHHHH¡ªkeuk... cough¡­¡° ¡°Grr¡­ Shut up, you damn bitch.¡± ¡°Calm down Joel, it¡¯s just a chil¡ª¡° Thwack. The woman¡¯s retort was cut short, and whimpering was heard from outside the wagon instead. ¡°¡­You were saying?¡± Silence followed. The secret door to the inner compartment of the wagon opened with two clicks, blinding the child with sunlight again, though it wasn''t as bad this time. A pair of hairy arms grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her out into a rocky alleyway in the middle of two tall apartment complexes. A new female voice was heard, cold and domineering. ¡°Do you have the goods?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve got ¡®er right ¡®ere. You got the gold?¡± With a jingle, a small sack was thrown near the child¡¯s feet. ¡°Oi, that¡¯s not the amoun¡¯ we talked ¡®bout¡­¡± Two masterfully thrown daggers sunk themselves into the carotid and femoral arteries in an instant, causing the fingers grabbing the child¡¯s shoulders to slacken. Thud. ¡°Your partner is dead. That gold should be enough for yourself, yes?¡± The man''s partnerwas ghostly pale in the face, but she managed to nod meekly. She quickly snatched the sack of gold from the cobblestones and blended in with the crowd in the Central District. Looking at the little girl who was desperately trying to crawl away with whatever strength she had left, the remaining woman in the alleyway chuckled evilly. ¡°Hey you! State your business. What are you doing in here?¡± Four armored soldiers patrolling the area appeared at one end of the alleyway with hands on their swordhilts, which glowed a dark blue. ¡°Tch. Level 350s¡­ knights, huh.¡± The woman glanced briefly at the child, who managed to squeeze herself in a small cardboard box, and muttered under her breath. ¡°I¡¯ll be back for you.¡± * * * I finally reached the real estate agency in the Central District. It was a very simple box of a building with the agency name scrawled in calligraphy above the main door. Suuuuuuuuu. ¡°Welcome to Happy Hespharia Real Estate, how can I help you?¡± A short, chubby man wearing a tailored business suit greeted me at the entrance while flashing a smile with his razor sharp teeth. He had two small horns sticking out from either side of his head in a demon-like fashion, and a thin, snaking, black tail that ended with a three-pronged trident. ¡°¡­I¡¯m looking for a home that doesn¡¯t cost too much but still has the basic amenities.¡± ¡°Of course, not a problem. Please follow me.¡± Leading me to the middle of the large, empty room that made up the entirety of the building, the devil realtor snapped his fingers. A white tablet poofed into existencein front of me, which he told me to put my hand on. ¡°This device will allow me to project an artificial image in your mind that your brain will interpret as an external input.¡± ¡°Uhh¡­ okay?¡± I hesitantly put my hand on the tablet, which glowed for a second before flying up to my head and giving it a hard ¡®Smack!¡¯ ¡®Bastard!¡¯ Snap. With another snap of the devil¡¯s fingers, a complex magic circle encompassed the entire room and created a ? sized hologram of a villa by the sea. ¡°5000 gold, seashore mansion in the Southern District. Easy access to the shipyard and Redlight District.¡± ¡°Hmm¡­ it¡¯s too expensive and big. I would likesomething simpler. Huh? W-what redlight¡ª¡° Snap. ¡°100 gold, broom closet underneath the stairs of a house owned by the ¡®Pudleys¡¯. Used to be the childhood home for a famous mage. The doorbell rings ¡®You¡¯re a Wizard, Fatty¡¯.¡± ¡°Uh... won¡¯t you get in trouble with the copyright office for this?¡± Snap. ¡°500 gold, bachelor suite on the 15th floor of an apartment complex in the Southern District. There¡¯s blood dripping from the ceiling, but that¡¯s been there forever. You can collect the blood and sell it to the vampires in the city.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll pass. Wait¡­ is that a mirror at the back wall? Oi, are you seeing this? Isn¡¯t that woman walking away from the mirror towards our reflections even though there¡¯s nothing actually in front of us?¡± Snap. ¡°1 gold, cardboard box in the Central District.¡± ¡°Hey, are you making fun of¡ª wait a moment. Can you freeze this image?¡± Snap. The hologram, which was depicting a live scene in the middle of a busy market, displayed a small cardboard box laid on its side in the alleyway, containing the figure of a collapsed child. To be continued¡­