《What the luck!》 Chapter 1 - Face planting Robert Frost was standing in the queue at the local ice cream shop, after having been rejected at yet another job interview he decided that he would have a stroll on the beach while eating an ice cream, all by his lonesome. Standing 1.75m tall, with light brown hair and eyes; average and forgettable is how those that can remember him would describe him. The problem for Robert was his personality, people didn¡¯t like him, and he had never been able to figure out exactly why; ¡®sure he had been a dick to people from time to time sure, but what the hell, people do stupid things when they get drunk!¡¯ Is what he always claimed in defense to himself though, ¡®at least now he had stopped drinking and smoking... so things should be getting better from now on right?¡¯ he thought as he started walking on the beach. He certainly felt healthier than he used to. Walking down the beach he enjoyed the fresh and salty sea air on his face and in his lungs, finding yet another reason to continue his prohibition of cigarettes. As Robert was being thankful for the greatness of life, ice cream is awesome; a blue screen pops up in front of him ruining his brilliant mood.
Damned earthlings, I have made mistakes in the way I guided life on planet earth, I go on holiday for a couple of millennia and look at this shit! I don''t like you human bastards. Thus I will be kicking you out into the mortal plane, where hopefully you bastards will die. Farewell. Hope you die. Earth is going be awesome without you trashes. I¡¯d kill you all but you aren¡¯t worth the bad karma.
¡®Well shit¡¯, Robert thought as space warped around him and he found himself in the middle of what appeared to be an Amazonian forest. He was standing on a small island protruding out of the swamp-ish hell that he was surrounded by. No solid ground as far as his eyes could see, only trees, a magnificent variety of trees, some tree roots even formed small makeshift islands around the base of the trees, and others had roots randomly spreading out in all directions popping up randomly from the water. ¡°...sigh, thanks god... asshole.¡± Inhaling the stale, pungent, forest air and almost vomiting; Robert cursed at himself for not having cigarettes on him. He continued eating his ice cream as he observed the environment more closely until...
Welcome to the mortal plane rejected earthlings. You will be receiving a randomized gift in order to increase your chances of survival and assimilation into the mortal plane. Do not despair; all living things have a chance at ascension in the mortal plane. You just need to be luckier than any of you are. Mortal plane administrator XXVI. PS. What did you do for Earth¡¯s god to hate you so much? He was mumbling something about his pets all being killed?
Gift package received!
Gifts package opened:
1. Random Skill 2. Random Elemental Affinity +++++ Bonus Gift +++++ 3. Random Race
Applying gifts...
Status
Name: Robert Frost Level: 1
Race: Halfling Class: -
Fame: 0 Infamy: 0
Health: 10/10
Mana: 36/36
Stamina: 100%
Stats
Strength: 3 Intelligence: 18
Vitality: 5 Wisdom: 15
Agility: 4 Charm: 4
Dexterity: 4 Luck: 7
Distributable Stats: 5
Elemental Affinities
Life
Skills
Observe Respawn
Life Affinity
The life affinity grants access to all life magic related abilities. Increases life span drastically. Natural health regeneration is increases drastically.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Observe F 1 0%
Allows the user to gain information about anything by staring directly at it and activating the skill. Information given is determined by skill level.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Respawn SSS 1 0%
Grants the holder the ability to respawn after dying. Holder respawns to random location. Level and stats are reset depending on level of skill.
Racial characteristics
Halflings have very long life spans. Bonus to intelligence and wisdom. Magic related skills gain double experience.
¡°Well that is some earth shattering luck right there... my luck is only seven though...¡± as Robert inspects all the blue screens there is a sudden flash of light, blinding him, when he regains his vision everything around him seems larger, including his clothes... realizing that he is exactly half of his previous glorious 1.75m, a bountiful 0.875m tall, Robert breaks down into tears. While experiencing an earth shattering bout of depression, Robert voluntarily regurgitates his delicious ice cream in order to taste the greatness of it after it mixed with stomach acid, he definitely did not vomit. On his knees panting, Robert ponders the meaning of life. In the divine plane, in a grand hall with a huge round table surrounded by numerous God¡¯s who have gathered for the fun of a mass migration into the mortal plane. Currently the atmosphere isn¡¯t as predicted though because of a certain new, vomiting, Halfling. ¡°WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SKILL? EVEN WE CAN¡¯T KILL HIM!¡± a blood red draconian roars at an elfish woman, otherwise known as Mortal plane administrator XXVI, on the other side of the table who is furiously fidgeting whilst looking extremely awkward. ¡°For a mass transfer of this nature there is a certain amount of karmic luck which is normally distributed across the entire transferred population but... their previous god specifically requested for them to be unlucky; so I could only concentrate the luck into one gift package, which was randomly distributed...¡± she trails off after trying to justify herself. ¡°WHAT DO YOU MEAN KILL HIM? HE IS ONE OF MY KIN! HAHAHAHA¡± a Halfling god, swinging a bottle of liquor half his size around, laughs his ass off while being happy about the windfall his species just gained, an undying Halfling with one of the rarest affinities. The draconian could only fume in his rage watching the ¡®ex-human¡¯ that received a skill with a SSS level that even he doesn¡¯t have. Robert, finally having composed himself, started analyzing his current circumstances. He is weak and he is short. Two physical traits which are not welcome in a forest filled with swamps. Especially considering how deep the water of the swamp is... and how short he is. Lamenting his fate he starts considering his options, he could kill himself? If what the respawn skill says he should simply respawn somewhere else. Disregarding this idea because of the unreliable nature of the skill, he could end up in worse and worse locations... Robert ends up left with only one option, which is magic, figuring it should exist considering everything else that has happened. Robert thinks about all the fantasy novels he has read through the years, and comes to the conclusion that the only real option and strand of hope he has is that meditation would somehow solve his current crisis. Robert tears of the sleeves of his long sleeve shirt, wearing it as a robe, since all of his clothes are completely oversized for him now. He makes a makeshift meditation mat to sit on out of the rest of his clothes and tries to meditate. Closing his eyes he tries to ¡®commune with the elements¡¯ with no results, he tries to ¡®become one with the world¡¯ with no effect, he tries to ¡®sense the dao¡¯ with no outcome. Frowning, he remembers his life affinity, he tries to meditate once again but this time he simply imagines all that represents life to him, plants, animals, nature, all the biological processes he can possibly remember. He imagines all the billions of single celled organisms in the air, water, and earth. He imagines all the interrelationships and dependencies that all life has with and on each other. The more he contemplates life while meditating, the closer his connection with the life elemental essence in the world he becomes until after while he falls into a trance like state. After a couple of hours of deep meditation Robert is jolted awake, the moment he awakens he experiences a mind rending headache before promptly passing out. At day break the next day Robert is rudely awoken by a loud repeating thwacking sound. Sitting up and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, Robert observes his surroundings. Promptly Robert jumps up and gets into a defensive stance with his Halfling fists held up before his chin, staring at an alligator the size of a bus ramming into an invisible shied between him and it, realizing he is being a complete fool he relaxes his posture, and observes the shield that is protecting him, now that the alligator is ramming it, it became visible, it is a transparent dome with a tinge or blue covering his little island. Only now does he notice the blue windows in the corner of his vision, he immediately focuses on them after realizing that he is safe.
Meditation learned!
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Meditation C 1 74%
Skill user enters a trance-like state in which the user gains a greater understanding of the element focused on. Can spontaneously learn new skills related to element focused on. Chance of learning a skill increases with the skill level of meditation. Consumers 3 mana per hour.
Mend learned!
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Mend E 1 0%
Basic healing spell of the Life element. Healer must be contact with target of spell. Heals health at the cost of mana in a 1:5 ratio. Ratio improves with the level of the skill.
¡®I am going to be a healer? But... who am I supposed to heal?¡¯ Robert looked on in disgust at his new spell. ¡®Should¡¯ve expected that... I could try and heal the alligator? And tame him?¡¯ Robert thought to himself. Slowly Robert made his way over to the bus sized alligator that was still mindless charging into the shield making the thwacking sound. As he got to the edge he stretched out his hand, poking the snout of the alligator with his index finger, and said ¡°Mend!¡±, pouring 5 mana into the spell, a green light flashed around the alligator. The alligator paused momentarily, it was in this small pause that the entire shield around Robert¡¯s little paradise island shattered leaving him completely unprotected. The alligator immediately noticed this and charged forward, opening its giant maw preparing to bite down on Robert. Robert jumped to the side dodging the head of the alligator by a hair, the alligators jaw shut down with an audible SMACK which resounded through the forest, sending birds flying. A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. Robert at this moment knew the situation wasn¡¯t good, he couldn¡¯t run with his little stump legs, he had no way to get away from this huge reptile. Robert quickly makes the decision that the only place with relative safety would be on top of the alligator. Robert jumped and grabbed onto one of the protrusions on the back of the alligator, and tried to pull himself up. The alligator feeling the actions of Robert swung its tail around hitting Robert on the back, a resounding crunch rang out as Robert lower spine was shattered. Pain shooting up his back Robert clung onto the protrusion for dear life, pouring 20mana into the Mend spell; healing him. Fighting a losing battle against blacking out, Robert noticed that although the pain is gone, he didn¡¯t regain control of his legs, he was still paralyzed in his legs. The alligator charged straight into the swamp and dove down under the water, feeling the that Robert still clung onto it¡¯s back it started rolling over, diving out of the water, and just in general thrashing around, all the while Robert was flinging around and holding on for dear life. Breaking down trees and charging into other alligators that were looking at the comical display, the alligator continued in the hope of throwing off the Halfling. Robert still clinging on for dear life, after having been water boarded, swung around like a rag doll, and had more bones broken than he cared to count from the alligator charging around and bumping into everything possible, it was a miracle that he still managed clung onto it this long. Realizing that he would die soon, Robert thought of his last straw of hope, he reached out into the space surrounding him with his life affinity to the life essence in the air in the hopes of finding a way for him to survive. As he did so he noticed an enormous amount of life essence clumped together inside of the alligator, the alligator was literally filled to the brim with the stuff. As Robert tugged on the alligator¡¯s life essence with his mind it literally flooded his into body the moment he touched it, it was as if flood gates was opened. As the life essence flooded Robert, healing him off all his broken bones, cuts, etc. even his spine started mending itself and he soon regained control over his legs. While Robert was being healed the alligator soon became lethargic, moving around slower and slower as time passed. The alligator was later just swimming floating while propelling itself forward with its tail at a very slow speed. As the life essence flooded Robert¡¯s body, once he was healed he started feeling full, his face turning red, and his body temperature was sky rocketing, Robert immediately diverted the flood of life essence spewing out of the alligator into the air. Robert drained the life essence of the alligator into the surroundings until the alligator came to a complete stand still. Robert was now floating on the corpse of the alligator, looking at the surroundings, Robert was shocked to find that he was completely surround by alligators, he could see fish moving around under the water, and he could see birds flying in a circle a couple of meters above him. Figuring that they were probably attracted by the freed life essence he quickly starts trying to figure out a way out of his certain death predicament. Soon he came to the conclusion that he was definitely going to die, he could try and jump onto another alligator but he would end up in the same situation once again. Thinking about all the game like elements he thought that perhaps if his respawn ability was true, he could die. But then he would possibly end up in another similar situation, figuring he needs time he thought about trying to bring the corpse of the alligator along with him when he dies, which would provide him with food while he tries to learn a way to survive. Poking the alligator with his index finger he says ¡°Loot¡± and amazingly nothing happens. Looking at his surroundings again, he notices that the excess life essence in the air was getting thinner and thinner as the creatures passed through it, as if they were absorbing it by simply touching it. Figuring he has at most a couple of minutes before they turn their attention to him he once again tries to think of games, ¡°HELP!¡± and nothing happens. Figuring he had no other options he decides to simply ride alligators while draining them of life essence until a different option presents itself. Robert spots the largest of the alligators and waits for it to pass by close enough to him, the moment it does he does a superman dive onto its back. Robert doesn¡¯t immediately activate life drain in the hopes that he might be able to ride the alligator out of the forest or to dry land at the very least. The moment Robert lands on the alligator even larger than the previous one, it immediately dives under water and stops. ¡®What the fuck is this!¡¯ Robert yells out in his head as he quickly runs out of breath, he activates life drain in the hopes that it can provide him with oxygen preventing his inevitable death. To his disappointment it doesn¡¯t, and to his disgust it feels as if the alligator is convulsing as if laughing at him. Soon his vision starts turning black, deciding that he has no other option he releases and swims up to get fresh air; before he makes it to the surface another alligator rushes from the side and clamps down on him with its humongous jaws, killing him instantly. In the peaceful darkness Robert found himself in, seconds turned to minutes and minutes to hours... then after a couple of what he could only guess to be days a blue screen disturbed his peace.
Respawning... Removing experience and stat gains... Constructing new mortal body... Spawning to random location...
In a flash of blinding light, Robert found himself standing on an empty cliff protruding from a rock face hundreds of meters off the ground, looking over the world. He was dressed in a basic short sleeve white robe, with basic sandals made out of thick yarn. ¡°Fuck!¡± is all Robert could bring himself to say as he realized he was stuck perched on the cliff; sure he was happy the Respawn skill was real... but... Noticing the flashing blue screens in the corner of his vision he focuses on them...
Life Drain learned!
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Life Drain A 2 15%
Drain the life essence from the target. Must be in contact with target. If contact with target is lost while performing life drain, the spell will rebound, damaging user for 95% of HP.
You have died.
¡®I¡¯ll have to be careful on what I use life drain in the future... I was lucky with the alligator¡¯ Robert thought casually. ¡®What to do, what to do...¡¯ looking off into the distance Robert notices smoke rising from a deforested area. ¡°A town!¡± Robert exclaims as he notices the buildings at the base of the smoke. ¡°HAHAHAHA I think I¡¯ll give a blessing to that alligator! HAHAHAHA¡± laughs the Blood red Draconian, feeling a lot happier after seeing Robert¡¯s miserable end. ¡°Life drain... he managed to learn life drain by himself... A-rank...¡± mumbles a stereotypical wizard, long grey beard, a staff, robes, and a pointed hat. ¡°HAHAHAHA LOOK AT WHERE HE SPAWNED¡± the draconian laughingly yells out once again after Robert respawned on the cliff. Even though it felt like days between dying and respawning for Robert, it was actually instantaneously... ¡°HMPH HMPH HMPH, doesn¡¯t matter, he is undying, let him fail a couple of times, he¡¯s got all the time in the world.¡± the Halfling god mutters, annoyed at the happy mood of the draconian. ¡°I¡¯d like to formally nominate him as my champion.¡± the Halfling God says, his voice heard by all as if the declaration was powered by the laws of the world. Silence is all that answers the Halfling. Until... ¡°I too would like to nominate him to be my champion.¡± the stereotypical wizard states, earning a furious stare from the Halfling. Not a second passed then... ¡°Me too!¡± Me too!¡± Me too!¡± Me too!¡± The voices of numerous gods echo out, the draconian¡¯s eyes were growing wider and wider, aghast at the thought of the Halfling receiving blessings from all these gods. ¡°DENIED¡± an overbearing voice echoes out, the word knocking the wind out of all present. Silence pervades as the atmosphere becomes tense. ¡°Leave him be, warn your people to beware of angering him, the consequences I think you can imagine.¡± Silence reigns over the Gods sitting around the round table. ¡°Tch¡± the blood red draconian clicks his tongue he realizes the meaning behind the words just said... Two days have passed since Robert spotted the Town off in the distance, the hunger and thirst was starting to get to him. Early in the mornings he can lick the rocks, satiating his thirst with a bit of dew... but he hasn¡¯t found any solutions to his hunger. Coming to the conclusion that he is going either going to die of thirst, but if he manages to lick enough rocks he might achieve starving to death... figuring that he either has to find a more reliable solution to his thirst and a source of food or he simply has to dive down head first from the cliff. Sitting down in on the cold rock floor he starts meditating again, this time he focuses on imagining everything he knows about the physiological processes that occur after ingesting food and water, how the food is broken down by the hydrochloric acid in the stomach, how some of the water is absorbed through the stomach lining, how after the food is broken down it enters the small intestine, how the molecules gets absorbed into the blood stream in the small intestine, etc., etc. he once again enters a trance like state while growing closer to the Life element. Robert is once again jolted awake out of his, he experiences another mind rending headache before passing out again. As he is blacking out he thinks ¡®I seriously have to find a way to stop this from happening¡¯. When he wakes up it is still dark, and ice cold. The wind is billowing so loudly that he can¡¯t even hear himself screaming, frustrated, he notices the flashing blue screens in the corner of his vision, focusing on them he sees...
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Meditation C 2 45%
Skill user enters a trance-like state in which the user gains a greater understanding of the element focused on. Can spontaneously learn new skills related to element focused on. Chance of learning a skill increases with skill level of meditation. Consumers 3 mana per hour.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Mend E 2 0%
Basic healing spell of the Life element. Healer must be contact with target of spell. Heals health at the cost of mana in a 1:4.9 ratio. Ratio improves with the level of the skill.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Life Drain A 2 73%
Drain the life essence from the target. Must be in contact with target. If contact with target is lost while performing life drain, the spell will rebound, damaging user for 95% of HP.
Regeneration learned!
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Regeneration A 1 0%
Buffs the target of the spell for 48 hours with 400% health points regeneration. Must be in contact with target. Consumes 5mana.
As Robert finished reading the notifications a severe pain hits him in the gut, ¡®ughh, what the hell is this, it feels like I¡¯m digesting myself!¡¯ Robert thinks to himself. Groaning only to irritate his extremely sensitive dried out throat, mouth, and tongue. He blinks in surprise only to feel his eyes burning, ¡¯it feels as if my eyes-lids are made out of sand paper!¡¯. ¡®FUCK THIS¡¯ Robert screams out in his mind, crawling over to the edge of the cliff he doesn¡¯t stop until he is free falling head first straight down. Taking a moment to enjoy the freedom of free falling, Robert smiles to himself as he considers he thinks about the past couple of days, ¡®Please be a better respawn... please.¡¯ Robert prays to himself. With a deafening crunch Robert¡¯s head burst like a water melon. His entire body changed into a meat patty. After a couple of days of peace in the endless darkness...
Respawning... Removing experience and stat gains... Constructing new mortal body... Spawning to random location...
Chapter 2 - Home Invasion Waking up dazed and confused, I am alive... again. All around me are lush shrubberies, ancient trees stretching into the sky hundreds of meters, the fresh floral smell of the forest please my sense of smell. Observing the air around me I can notice the protective dome is covering me once again. Looking directly in front of me, beyond the protective dome, about 5 meters off the ground there is a deep indentation in the tree trunk, a perfect hiding spot for a Halfling! For a second I consider that perhaps Respawn isn¡¯t a total bastard of a skill. Weighing my options between a protective dome with a timer in the middle of the forest floor or a sneaky hiding spot meters off the forest floor, I make the logical choice and dash in the direction of the tree. Squirreling my way up the tree trunk by grabbing onto the rough bark I quickly make my way up to the tree-cave, taking note of the fact that this respawn so far has the most promising environment I swear to myself that I¡¯m going to make it count. Making myself comfortable on the dry leaves that cover the floor of my new home, which is about 1.5m deep and 1 meter around, the floor sinking a bit deeper than the entrance. Lying on my back I make the decision to learn as much about the blue screens I¡¯ve seen before doing anything else. I start by opening my status menu...
Status
Name: Robert Frost Level: 1
Race: Halfling Class: -
Health: 10/10
Mana: 36/36
Stamina: 100%
Stats
Strength: 3 Intelligence: 18
Vitality: 5 Wisdom: 15
Agility: 4 Charm: 4
Dexterity: 4 Luck: 7
Distributable Stats: 5
Elemental Affinities
- Life
Skills
- Observe - Respawn - Meditation - Mend - Life Drain - Regeneration
Alright... there a couple things to take note of, I don¡¯t have a class, I have 5 ¡®distributable stats¡¯, and my race is ¡®Halfling¡¯. Everything is more or less self explanatory, I want to try and survive in the forest or at the very least stay alive long enough in order to escape and make it to society, fingers crossed I¡¯m not thousands of miles away from society. Survival in a forest is all about stealth, and stealth is all about controlling your body to a very minute degree in order to be able to perfectly control where and how each step is taken, so for now I¡¯ll place all 5 distributable stats into dexterity. Next I should review all of my skills, gaining a greater understanding of them can only be beneficial...
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Observe F 1 0%
Allows the user to gain information about anything by staring directly at it and activating the skill. Information given is determined by skill level.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Respawn SSS 1 20%
Grants the holder the ability to respawn after dying. Holder respawns to random location. Level and stats are reset depending on level of skill.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Meditation C 1 74%
Skill user enters a trance-like state in which the user gains a greater understanding of the element focused on. Can spontaneously learn new skills related to element focused on. Chance of learning a skill increases with the skill level of meditation. Consumers 3 mana per hour.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Mend E 2 0%
Basic healing spell of the Life element. Healer must be contact with target of spell. Heals health at the cost of mana in a 1:4.9 ratio. Ratio improves with the level of the skill.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Life Drain A 2 15%
Drain the life essence from the target. Must be in contact with target. If contact with target is lost while performing life drain, the spell will rebound, damaging user for 95% of HP.
Skill Name: Skill Rank: Skill Level: Skill Experience:
Regeneration A 1 0%
Buffs the target of the spell for 48 hours with 400% health points regeneration. Must be in contact with target. Costs 5mana to cast.
Regeneration... I¡¯ll have to keep this spell active on myself at all time from now on, couldn¡¯t hurt. I immediately cast Regeneration on myself, a green light flashes around me and then sinks into me. I feel more energetic and exuberant as well, I literally feel more alive; it seems the regeneration spell has some unmentioned side effects, whether this is related to health regeneration in general or a direct result of the regeneration spell will need further investigation. Life Drain, my only killing spell, I¡¯m a bit conflicted about, if used in the correct circumstances it can be considered a cheat of all cheats but... those are some very narrow circumstances. First I have to find out if it is possible for the spell to fail, for example by using it on a target whose level is too high; would I receive the 95% damage? Then there is the excess life essence that I can¡¯t absorb which I have to set free into the air which attracts other wild beasts as happened in the swamp, I¡¯ll either find a different destination for the excess life essence or I¡¯ll have to secure an escape route before using the spell which can¡¯t be blocked by the beasts. Perhaps I could channel the life essence into plants? I¡¯ll have to try this later... Mend... eh... basic heal, can¡¯t even fix a broken back. It can probably fix scratches and cuts, I¡¯m not sure to what extent it can heal but I¡¯m definitely not going to start inuring myself like some fool to find out the exact limits... eventually ending up with a broken arm that I can¡¯t heal... in the middle of a forest full of unknown dangers. No thank you. At least it can fill up my hp preventing me from dying right? Meditation has been good to me, it isn¡¯t ideal considering that it makes me enter a trance like state which I can¡¯t exit before my mana is completely drained resulting in a mind rending headache after which I pass out. The positives outweigh the negatives though considering it helped me learn Mend and Regeneration. If I can find a way to exit the trance like state before I am completely drained from mana it would be ideal. Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author. Respawn... respawn... respawn... I love and hate this skill. It looks like I get 10% experience per death which means it is capable of leveling up which means that there is a small, minute possibility of me controlling the spawn points in the distant future but... getting the necessary amount of experience in the skill to achieve that doesn¡¯t look like it is going to be a walk in the park. Observe? I completely overlooked this skill from the start... I look at my tree-cave wall and say ¡®observe¡¯ in my mind, immediately the word ¡®tree¡¯ appears in my mind, that¡¯s it. ¡°TREE? TREE!?¡± flabbergasted at the degree of detail provided by the skill I notice that I gained 1% experience in observe for observing the so called ¡®tree¡¯, I decide that I should observe everything around me as much as possible from now on; perhaps if the skill level of Observe reaches a high enough level the skill could end up being useful. Crawling closer to the exit of my humble abode, I peak outside and start using observe on everything. I get no useful information at all. I start thinking of what my future plans should be, should I try and survive in the forest for a while before trying to find society? It seems like the logical choice considering I¡¯m level one, and I¡¯m a healer... but at the same time am I capable of surviving in the forest? Considering this it also seems like the logical choice for me to get the hell out of here as fast as possible. I decide to make the tree-cave my base camp, and survive here until I am either chased away by something or I believe I am strong enough to get out of the forest. If I want to survive here I¡¯ll have to hunt for meat, and gather plants for my other needed nutrients, and learn more about the forest in general. Gathering plants will have to wait until my Observe skill gets to a high enough level to tell me whether or not a plant is edible or not, I could also watch what the herbivores are eating and eat what they eat. For hunting I can only use traps... the problem is that I don¡¯t have any fancy hunting knowledge of some crazy traps made out of shoelaces... and I don¡¯t even have shoelaces. The only real traps I could come up with are pit fall traps, with either sharp sticks at the bottom or I could simply trap the animals in the pit and jump onto them and drain their life essence in the same way I did with the alligator, if I could secure an escape route out of the tunnel after this I could probably attract even more creatures into the pit with the excess life essence. Digging a hole which is large enough for whatever creatures live around here could be a problem though, especially considering that I¡¯m not even a meter tall. I could also try lifting a large rock high up into a tree and wait for an animal to pass by under me, and then drop the rock onto its head, simple right? Maybe I could make a lift system with some vines and pull a larger rock up, maybe I could make a simple noose out of said vines, connect it to a large rock high up in the tree, throw the noose around the neck of an animal and then kick the rock of, hanging the animal? Wait, no... This is getting overly complicated; first I¡¯ll try the simple plan of dropping rocks onto animals from my comfortable and safe tree-cave. I¡¯ll look around for some vines, maybe making a net or something and set up some more complicated traps in the future. For now I have too little information about the surrounding dangers to spend any prolonged time outside of my tree-cave. Looking around the on the forest floor I spot a conspicuous rock at the base of the tree trunk my tree-cave is in that is about size that I think I¡¯m capable of carrying with my meager amount of stats in strength. Looking around for any movements, listening for any animals, I hear and see nothing. Squirreling down the tree trunk I slip halfway down and fall flat on my ass, pain shooting up my spine, I fight the urge to scream an unrepeatable string of curses which I manage to fight down to simply muttering a single of whispered curse. The wind carries a whispered ¡®fuck¡¯ through the forest. I pounce in the direction of the rock still mindful of the surroundings. Finally reaching the rock, I have completed half of my adventure; I turn back with the rock under one arm I struggle back up the tree. Finally reaching the safety of my humble little abode I fall on my back into my dried leaf bed and release a breath I didn¡¯t notice I had been holding in. Admiringly I look at my bountiful harvest, a rock roughly the size of my head. Completely oval on one side and completely flat on the other side, even slightly indented. Before I could use the Observe skill on my prized rock I feel a very slight vibration in my tree-cave floor. Again and again I feel the vibration, getting stronger and stronger with each successive vibration. Then I start hearing snapping and rustling sounds along with the vibrations, almost as if... it is a huge creature getting closer and closer, the vibrations I¡¯ve been hearing are its heavy steps on the forest floor... I shiver in terror at the thought of a creature big enough to cause vibrations that travel this far from its massive weight, all the while I¡¯m still not even able to see a shadow as I peak in the direction of the sounds from my little tree-cave. I try and breath as little as possible while staying as still as possible in hope that the monstrosity would simply pass by my little home and leave me be... much to my disappointment it didn¡¯t. As I shiver while staring at the huge shadow crashing through shrubberies and small trees while narrowly avoiding the ancient trees, the shadow comes into full view. A Mammoth at least 7 meters tall, thick lush fur covering its entire body, tusks at least 3 meters long, a trunk hanging from its face almost reaching the forest floor, eyes larger than my head staring straight at me who is peeking out of my tree-cave. Without think too much about it I use Observe on the creature... ¡®Mammoth¡¯... wow thank you observe, you just saved me. Heading straight in my direction, the monstrosity slows to a stop a couple of meters of my tree, I have been frozen in pure terror since the moment I saw the entirety that is this monstrosity; so I just stare straight at it with a dull look in my eyes. It looks almost as if the creature is amused at my terror as it angles its head to the left while staring at me, almost as if it is pondering what the cure little creature is in front of it. The creature¡¯s trunk that has a girth greater than my entire body slowly lifts up and moves in my direction, it is at this moment that I regain control of my senses and reverse crab-walk back up against the back wall of my tree-cave. Staring at the monstrous trunk moving closer and closer I start wondering what my next spawn point is going to be like... The trunk stops centimeters from my face then sniffs... with a wet smack my head is sucked up into one of the nostrils of the trunk. Gagging at the disgusting smell and wet sensation on my face from the insides of the nostril I grab the trunk and tear out my head while furiously thinking of a way to get this creature to leave me alone, then a thought hits me... aren¡¯t mammoth¡¯s herbivores? Elephants are so... shouldn¡¯t mammoths also be? As I regain some of my previously lost mental faculties in the face of the giant creature; I think of a way I can show it that I am friendly... after all I can¡¯t exactly jump onto it and use life drain on it. That would end up in much the same way the situation ended up with the alligators, and I don¡¯t want to lose my safe little tree-cave, the first relatively safe place outside of the protective shields I¡¯ve had access to since I came to this world. Though I am questioning the degree of safety my tree-cave can provide me with my new found knowledge of the creatures that call this forest home. After making the decision that I have to make friendly with the creature, which by all indications wasn¡¯t being aggressive towards me. I cast regeneration on it to see what happens. A green light envelops the Mammoth then sinks into it. The Mammoth¡¯s trunk freezes immediately, it stares straight at me eyes wide open. ¡°Don¡¯t eat me... please?¡± I say while staring at the shocked Mammoth, the creature stares back at me for a second before slowly backing away, all the while keeping its eyes on me. It then turns around and literally sprints away in the direction it came from. The last thing I see is its tail wagging... Staring in the direction the Mammoth disappeared into I consider the possibility that the mammoth was maybe... a child? The tusks were a bit short? At this moment my rock decides to start moving. Chapter 3 - Blue Blood Staring at my pet rock that happens to be a turtle I contemplate whether to officially adopt him into my household or to feast on his organs and drink his blood. I''m leaning to option number two considering my chances of acquiring a second pet rock whose organs I can feast on and whose blood I can drink. Twisting the pet rock''s head around and getting goose bumps as a result of the gruesome crunch I bite its rough skin between front teeth in order to create a small hole from which I can start tearing its head off. In a similar fashion to opening a bag of chips, instead it is a turtle and it is filled with blue blood, wait blue blood? Contemplating whether or not blue blood is poisonous I bite the headless neck of the pet rock and hold its body above my head and start sucking. More and more blood floods into my mouth and I swallow as fast as I can. Promptly throwing the pet rock onto the ground before vomiting a mix of half digested pet rock food and blue blood, excuse me, voluntarily regurgitating the delicious pet rock vomit and blood in order to savour the taste before spitting it out in a similar fashion to taste-testing a finely aged wine. Lying in a puddle of my vomit whilst hyperventilating, I come to the conclusion that I ingested something poisonous, blue blood is definitely poisonous. Making a mental list of the best possible actions to take in a scenario as precarious as this unique situation that has the highest probability of increasing my chances of survival I promptly pass out and completely forget about the list. I wake up to someone stabbing me in the stomach. I try screaming while flailing my arms around in order to defend myself from this son of a bitch bastard that stabs sleeping people only unceremoniously shit myself and voluntarily regurgitate the left over contents in my stomach, which is mostly stomach acid that immediately starts burning my throat and nose. I am still crawling and flailing my arms around my splashing around in the vomit and excrement only to discover that there isn¡¯t anybody here, a bit too late as I fall out of my humble abode and belly flop on the solid earth interspersed with roots and rocks. Might as well, my humble abode isn¡¯t all that habitable any longer. Tainted with a desecrated corpse of a tortoise, copious amounts of vomit and diarrhoea, I¡¯d much rather simply respawn once again. As I come to my senses I realise that I am sick, very sick. Nausea, diarrhoea, abdominal pain, and... Definitely a fever, I think as I start feeling cold and shivering like a newborn lamb. I¡¯m definitely not cold because I am soaked in all kinds of bodily fluids. How the hell did this happen? Is the blue blood poisonous as well as being the home to nasty little pathogen bastards? I cast mend on myself using half of my mana, relief washes over my like a spring breeze. STAB. Half-way through my relief moan I am treated to even more intense gut pain. Adopting the trusty old foetal position while making dying sounds I continuously heal myself. Apparently mend can¡¯t cure the poison or infection only the effects. Shit world. Before I manage to die from dehydration, which would release me from my suffering, I hear the all too familiar vibrations of a terrifying juvenile mammoth heading my way. I roll over in order to peek in the direction of my unwelcome visitor, wait... visitors? As the mammoth comes into view I see 3 figures casually standing on top of its head, their happy and content facial expressions morph into ones of complete and utter disgust as they spot me. Elves, it turns out, aren¡¯t a sympathetic, supportive, and kind-hearted people. No, they are uncaring, psychopathic bastards with no humanity in them. ¡°Demon spawn! How dare you taint our pristine forest with your filth!¡± is what I¡¯m assuming he/she screeches considering I don¡¯t understand any of what it is saying. He/she makes some random gestures with her/his arms saying something incomprehensible after which the tree starts growing branches that immediately surrounds me, lifts me up and hold me right in front of these extremely effeminate beings. Another branch extends out of my previously humble but now tainted abode holding the remains of one desecrated tortoise corpse. The 2 two adult elves pale upon seeing the state of the tortoise... the little one of the 3 literally goes bat shit crazy. It screeches like a cat getting a haircut with belt sander. Did I kill a little girl¡¯s pet turtle? One of the adults immediately restrains the raging little one with a bear bug while giving me the death stare. After a short conversation between the two adults the one that cast the wood manipulations spell on me takes action again. Here I am, impaled against the tree. He took his time with me, the end results of his praiseworthy efforts are two roots through my feet, two roots through my knee caps, two roots through my hands, and one root through my groin. IT WAS JUST A TURTLE. I am never casting regeneration on myself again. Stupid spell lasts 48 hours. The spell stopped me from bleeding out and regenerated my lost blood preventing me from dying due to shock caused by blood loss. Never mind impaling me on a tree, this elf son of a bitch had to somehow modify my tainted previously humble abode so as to allow a slow trickle of the vomit and excrement to drip out onto my head in slow and constant rhythm. Worst respawn ever, including all possible future respawns. I don¡¯t know how many hours I lasted but they were not pleasant and do not want to discuss how I managed to drown instead of waiting for dehydration to take my pitiful life. Relishing in the peace and quiet of the endless void I dread the idea of going back to hell...
Respawning... Removing experience and stat gains...This novel''s true home is a different platform. Support the author by finding it there. Constructing new mortal body... Spawning to random location...
Waking up dazed and confused, I am alive... again. It is different from the previous respawns in that I can hear voices... a lot of voices. Cautiously opening my eyes I see people, a lot of people. They seem to be wearing clothes from earth, full of blood and mud. I think they might just be some of my fellow inhabitants originating from earth. They have completely surrounded me and are looking at me as if I¡¯m some extraterrestrial species. I gingerly stand up and pat the dust of my basic white robe. ¡°Hello?¡± I say in English which brings forth another round of hushed whispered, I¡¯m pretty sure I heard an ¡°It speaks¡±. ¡°Are you guys from earth?¡± I ask to no one in particular... a little boy about 5 years old replies with a very pretentious ¡°What is it to you where we are from Mr. Shining bubble?¡± followed by a collective silence from all parties involved. It takes a while for my internal GPS to recalculate and a start formulating a mature and calm response... ¡°I¡¯m not a shining bubble, you are a shining bubble! Your mom is a shining bubble!¡± ¡°What did you say about my mom!?¡± Hearing the shining bubble insult his mother the 5 year old immediately charges forward and starts punching the bubble that doesn¡¯t know its place. Watching the dumpling going psycho on the shield I thought to be transparent, I poked the shield with my index finger and it instantly shattered. Resulting in a little urchin instantly face planting at my feet. Fighting the urge to laugh and loosing, I near instantly burst out laughing uproariously at the little fool. Face red as a tomato the little urchin slowly gets up, pats the dust off of his clothes and then lifts his head to face me, for the first time in my life I see true rage. The face of Asura, he is going to kill me. Slowly I start stepping back from the little wild animal, almost in sync as I back up he matches me, each time I take a step back he takes a step forward. Oh, and the little 7 year old urchin wild animal is... taller than me. I could hear the shuffling of feat as the people behind me opened a path as I continued backing up until it I was outside of the encirclement with the wild urchin still doing his creepy slow walk in my direction. ¡°Your mom is a shining bubble!¡± I landed a perfect metaphorical uppercut before turning around and skipping away, doing my best self satisfied laugh possible. The crowd of earth¡¯s ex-inhabitants having had their minds dulled because of the fantastical world over the last couple of days since they were transported here just stood there unsure of what to do the entire time... until they heard what can only described as the sound of a cat being gutted with a dull rusted butter knife. When they finally came to their senses they could only see what appeared to be a hobbit lackadaisically skipping away while being chased by a 5 year old urchin in level 9000 berserker mode. As I skip away from the berserker mode chipmunk I observe the environment around me, which appears to be some form of a refugee camp. I see tents everywhere along with the normal air of hopelessness and despair. Here and there I spot a couple of people who don¡¯t look like they are experiencing the apocalypse. It seems a refugee camp has been built for the Earthlings on an open grass field outside of a city as I can see a gigantic wall at least 25 meters tall in the distance, judging by the size of the people on the wall, unless they are some type of giant or Halfling like I am my guess should be somewhat accurate. As the screeching stops behind me I turn around to see the little fellow is finally out of breath... still chasing after me at the speed of a brisk walk. It would appear I pushed the wrong button and thoroughly enraged him. Patiently waiting for the little fool I sit down on a nearby patch of comfortable looking grass... well grass that hasn¡¯t been stomped into a muddy mash. As the exhausted fellow finally arrives near me he falls in my general direction with a fist stretched out. Naturally he misses and just lies there, experiencing what appears to be an existential crisis of apocalyptic proportions. Tentatively I ask ¡°Why so sensitive?¡± He lifts his head from the ground and stares at me like I am the one that slaughtered his entire family, which is a guess that is unfortunately probably quite close to the truth considering that no one is behind him, ¡°What are you? Why can you speak English?¡± apparently he managed to quell his rage just tiny bit... ¡°Obviously I¡¯m a human just like you and well... about 1 in 10 people on Earth, well from Earth, can speak English so I just happen to be one of the ones of that one in 10. I just happen to have been transformed into a Halfling by a random gift package, obviously. Why so sensitive?¡± He stares at me for a while then he starts crying! What the fuck is this! ¡°Stop stop stop, I don¡¯t care why you are so sensitive! Just stop crying!¡± He starts crying even more! Remembering a jolly mammoth who betrayed me by ratting out on my awesome tree cave to the bastard elves I stretch out my hand and poke him in the face with my index finger whilst saying ¡°Regeneration¡±, casting regeneration on him. The moment I cast Regeneration it is as if a nuclear silence bomb exploded. Not only does the little fool go completely silent, even the people in the surrounding area go quiet. Most of the people had already been staring at us from the moment the little fool started crying but now they all seem to be frozen as well. Shattering the silence the little rat yells ¡°Teach me!¡± little bastard can¡¯t even say please. ¡°Please?¡± I stare down at him for a bit to which he responds ¡°Please?¡± ¡°Sure! But there isn¡¯t a lot I can teach to be honest, only one skill I can think of. Show me your status.¡± I would be happy to distract this little shit face from crying again, I hate crying children. ¡°How?¡± he answers warily... even going so far as giving me a suspicious look! This is what I get for trying to be a helpful person. ¡°I don¡¯t know; say ¡®show Robert frost status¡¯ or something.¡± I say with a bit of annoyance. The little fool says it out load and it works... the system is surprisingly simple.
Status
Name:Jeremy HeartLevel: 1
Race: HumanClass:-
Health:8/8
Mana:22/22
Stamina:5%
Stats
Strength:3Intelligence:11
Vitality:4Wisdom:12
Agility:2Charm:6
Dexterity:5Luck:6
Distributable Stats: 5
Elemental Affinities
- Fire
Skills
- Observe - Growth
¡°Hoho, you are a clever little fool aren¡¯t you. Fire though, it could work.¡± Formulating my plan of action I just hope it is possible to teach meditation to the little fool. He is too young to have had any meaningful education though his intelligence and wisdoms indicates he is quite smart, it could work. ¡°What I am going to try and teach you is a skill I discovered all on my own.¡± I wait patiently for him to praise my ingenuity... nothing. ¡°It is called meditation and I think it has something to do with the knowledge we gained from our lives on earth, I have an affinity for the life element so when I meditated on what I knew about biology I gained some nifty skills. You have an affinity for the fire element thus you should meditate while contemplating everything you know about fire.¡± I once again wait for praise... only to receive none. As I look around I that quite a number of people have gathered round and were listening to my little speech, some of whom have shining eyes while some of them look like they have been fed some blue blood. I guess they are probably people who do not have an affinity. The ones with the shining eyes quickly turn around and seem to be going back to their tents to meditate. It is quite hot here, I¡¯m getting all sweaty. It feels like I am standing front of an over... and now it feels like I am standing in front of a camp fire, and now it feels like I am standing next to a FUCKING RIVER OF LAVA. Finally I notice a red glow around the little rat bastard, and soil under him also has a red shine to it. All of a sudden Flames burst out of him completely engulfing me turning me to ash instantaneously. Floating around in the endless blissful darkness I think back to my unfortunate ending in a heavenly respawn point. Was that enlightenment? Was the kid one of those little geniuses that were doing the high school curriculum in the womb? Well hopefully some of the people who heard what I said about meditation survived giving fellow inhabitants from Earth a better chance at survival. At the very least I hope it makes their lives easier than my experience in this word thus far...