《***ABANDONED***It Was the Best of Slimes, It Was the Worst of Slimes》 Chapter One: I wish I was British Seven hundred thirty four¡­.seven hundred thirty-five...seven hundred thirty-six¡­.seven hundred thirty-seven I counted to myself. I stopped to wipe the sweat from my face and ended up covering my forehead with dirt instead. It was warm this spring, hitting the upper 90s(about 32 C to those of the metric inclination) in Florida not unusual but definitely uncomfortable. I reached over to grab my water bottle and took a long swig of tepid water with a delightful sulfur aftertaste...Florida water sucks. "Hardy! Are you not done yet? I pay you by the hour, but that doesn''t mean you can milk it!", screamed Mr. Jenkins. "When I was your age I wasn''t afraid of hard work!" "Yes sir, Mr. Jenkins!", I yelled looking up out the ditch with my brown eyes. "I''ll put my nose to the grindstone and start pulling myself up by my bootstraps!" "Damn smartass millennials," he grumbled as he stomped off. To be honest I''m not sure someone who is over three hundred pounds can do anything other than stomp. I sincerely doubt Mr. Jenkins has worked a single day in his life unless spending his family''s money and eating himself into an early grave count. I''ve seen the man put Velveeta cheeses on his pizza, the fact that he hasn''t keeled over yet blows my mind. Cheap bastard wouldn''t even pay for a backhoe to dig this ditch across his property. Instead, he chose to hire an "underprivileged youth" to do the job for him. I''ve been digging this damn ditch daily after school and on weekends since the ground thawed. I thought I would have put on extra muscle by now, but exercise and limited diet do not combine to build bulk. Stamina I had plenty of, as well as the ability to concentrate on a task no matter how boring(High School for the WIN!). I needed the money though, graduation was soon and the privilege of being a ward of the state would end and I would be out on my own. Then all this great countries opportunities would be open to me...a high school educated orphan. Orphans here, unlike those who live in England, don''t receive invitations to magic schools, float away on giant peaches housing bugs, or win ownership of a chocolate factory. A whole lifetime of ditch digging vistas lay before me...ooh, can you feel the excitement? Looking out across the acres of well-manicured lawn contemplating how far I had dug so far, I pushed my hair away with the backof my hand from my face, smearing sweat and mud on my pale skin. The lawn stretched from the house out to the main road, about a football field in length. The actual road itself was blocked off by a small wooded area to prevent others from seeing the house and blocking the sound. I had made it three-fourths of the way to the road so far which considering the ditch was half my height at 3ft was phenomenal progress in my opinion. I should finish before graduation, despite what Jenkins thought. I grabbed hold of the shovel with both hands and jammed it into the mound of dirt, I''m sick of counting shovel fulls, maybe I should switch to singing? "You load sixteen tons and what do ya get? Another day older and deeper in"...CLANG! Clang was not the next line in that song from what I remember. Looking down into the ditch a small glitter of gold sparkled through the brown mud. My first thought was that Mr. Jenkins didn''t bother to label where the water and sewage pipes were and I had hit one of those. Throwing the shovel out of the ditch, I bent down and wiped away mud slowly revealing a bronze object about 10 by 5 by 5 inches. Its base was round and tapered up into something resembling a gravy boat with a handle on one end and a spout on the other. On top a rounded cap was stuck fast, resisting my admittedly weak efforts to open it up. I gave it a good shake and heard nothing rattle or thump within. Now I could ask Mr. Jenkins about it, but as soon as I did that he would have grabbed it out my hands and I would never see it again. As the man was not hurting for money I decided to keep it from him. Maybe I could sell it to an antique dealer, and every little bit would help after graduation even if it was only a couple of dollars.This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere. Checking my watch, and seeing it was time for my work day to end I climbed out of the ditch and placed the gravy boat in my lunch bag. I then gathered up my shovel and throwing it into the wheelbarrow and took them back to the shed. I had to make sure everything was clean and ready for work the next day because Jenkins only paid me when I was digging, not when I was prepping or closing down for the day... I mentioned he was cheap right? I walked past the front porch and waved at Mr. Jenkins, who didn''t acknowledge my existence other than to look down at his watch and write the time down on a piece of paper. He would probably deduct the time it took for him to yell at me from today''s hours...jackass. Walking down the long driveway, I came to the main road and began the hour-long hike back to the orphanage where I lived. I was used to the walk, and almost on autopilot drifted further in the roadside pull off as cars rushed past not even needing to adjust my balance as the air pushed me from behind. My thoughts drifted to the gravy boat in my bag, trying to estimate it''s worth. Would it be better to take it to the pawn shop or the antique store in town? The pawn shop would buy it for sure no questions asked, but at a huge markdown. I''m not sure about the antique store, they might need it appraised. Not to mention they might question where I got it, worried that I might have stolen it. I''d try and clean it up after I got back to my room, with a little spit and polish I would probably get a bit more out of the sale. With those thoughts filling my head I arrived at the halfway house/orphanage I called home. It was a dump, but considering it housed a bunch of orphaned kids you couldn''t expect much. I had to make sure that the gravy boat was hidden, damn kids here would steal the gold filling out of your mouth if you were a heavy enough sleeper. Stopping first in the laundry room I swiped some socks belonging to Milo Stevens. A complete cock goblin and thug, anything I could do to screw him over brought me a little joy. He had been in the orphanage almost as long as I had, and while I lacked any outstanding talents or abilities that would entice adoption or fostering, he was skilled in intimidation, sadism, cruelty and being an all around asshole to prevent anyone from wanting him. It''s funny we were both in the same boat, me because I was average and him because he was a sociopathic Neanderthal. Creeping up the stairs I stealthily walked past his room and unlocking my door and into my own. It wasn¡¯t much, but it was home for most of my teenage years. A bed with a worn sunken mattress took up the right side wall. I had splurged and bought some more comfortable bedding to replace the harsh sheets there when I moved in. On the walls I had plastered the wall with pictures of castles, vast forests, and fantastic ruins ripped from travel magazines. I liked to stare at them and imagine I was someplace magical, that there was something mysterious and wild out there...despite what my life showed to be the case. A wobbly desk stood under the window facing out toward the street. Chipped and scarred from years of abuse before I had taken ownership it was serviceable. I set my bag under the bed I grabbed a change of clothes, a towel, and some soap and headed out to the shower. After a quick shower and a change of clothes, I felt more human. I made sure to fill a small bucket with water from the bathroom sink and took it back to my room. Closing the door and locking it behind me I sat down at my worn desk adjusting my weight as I leaned against it to prevent it from wobbling underneath my arms. I reached under the bed and dragged out the bag and pulled out the gravy boat. Taking the time I carefully picked off the dirt and clay from the gravy boat. After cleaning it somewhat I couldn''t find any details or decoration. It was smooth and I''m pretty sure made out of brass. Taking Milo''s sock and the water from the bucket I began to thoroughly clean the boat. Even though I was tired from a long day at work I put effort into scrubbing off the tarnish and remaining dirt, trying to get it looking as new as possible. Polishing the boat(not a euphemism) caused smoke to lightly than ever thicker began to come out of the spout. The smoke, a dark purple color, quickly filled up the room obscuring my vision and causing me to hack and cough. I started to panic and grabbed my wet towel from my shower and began to beat at the origin of the smoke, hoping to put out the fire or whatever it was. With a flick of the towel, I heard a quick snap and a sharp retort. ¡°God¡¯s dammit, stop whipping me with that thing! It hurts you son of a goat lover.¡± Chapter Two: If you Rub it She will Come! I dropped the wet towel in shock. Coughing in confusion I waved the smoke away from my face, causing a small whirlwind in front of me, out of which appeared a woman¡¯s face. A pale blue in color it was surrounded by a sweep of purple hair. Glowing green eyes stared at me in anger, as the smoke slowly dissipated. She was wearing a purple genie outfit, just like I Dream of Genie minus the stupid hat. She had a set of wicked looking nails, and not the fake press on nails but closer to the rake your face with my claws type. ¡°Don¡¯t you know it¡¯s rude to strike a lady, especially a guest invited into your room?¡±, She smiled at me like a predator which was easy as her mouth was full of sharp teeth. ¡°Cat got your tongue boy? Never had a lady appear out of a lamp in your bedroom? I¡¯m happy to be your first, you can call me Merielle.¡± ¡°Gravy Boat¡±, I croaked not taking my eyes away from her. She was gorgeous in an alien eat your face off sort of way. I think my brain blue screened. ¡°Gravy Boat?¡± ¡°Uh, never mind my brain just vomited up something random¡±, hopefully covering up my mistake. ¡°Oh, well then, let¡¯s get down to business then. Standard rules apply, one No wishing for more wishes, two no wishing for unlimited power, three all wishes are final no refunds. What¡¯s your first one?¡± I was going through information overload and didn¡¯t know where to start processing what was said. I guess the gravy boat could be a lamp, but it would be a better-looking gravy boat in my opinion and that¡¯s not saying much. OK she¡¯s a genie, wishes, pretty standard rules. My quick acceptance of the situation may seem strange, but it makes sense. Either I just rubbed a genie lamp and now have 3 wishes or I¡¯m crazy and am I hallucinating/dreaming a genie. If I¡¯m insane not much I can do but go with the ride, or it¡¯s real. Either way I might as well move forward, fighting it won¡¯t do a damn thing. OK, so what do I remember about stories involving genies...they are portrayed by either hot chicks, Robin Williams, or are going to screw me over. While this genie is pretty hot, I¡¯m going to assume this isn¡¯t an anim¨¦ and she wants to be my sex slave. Robin Williams is dead, and this genie isn¡¯t funny so that¡¯s probably out. I should go under the assumption that she will screw me over. So if I wish for a billion dollars she will give it to me in pennies and I will be buried alive ¡°Quick question, are questions allowed?¡± ¡°Certainly¡± ¡°What consists of a wish? If I ask for a grapefruit does that count, or do I have to say I wish for a grapefruit?¡± ¡°You have to say I wish for a grapefruit¡±, she said handing me a grapefruit. ¡°Wish one down and simple at that, how refreshing. People usually ask for wealth or a harem, I¡¯m glad you are thinking healthy if not wisely.¡± ¡°Hell¡¯s Bells! So it¡¯s going to be like that then, going the lawyer route?¡± ¡°Absolutely not! Only Devils can take that class. I¡¯m a politician, much higher Charisma stat.¡± OK, so I need to shut my mouth and think this through. Less chance of me making a mistake and getting another citrus fruit. Did I want a harem? Not really, seems like more work than pleasure to me. I would also have to wish for wealth because not much fun having a harem living on the streets in refrigerator boxes. Do I want wealth? I¡¯ve seen with Mr. Jenkins that wealth doesn¡¯t bring happiness, but it does provide unlimited Velveeta, not something I want. I could wish for happiness, but then I will probably be struck dumb and end up a drooling mental patient happily staring at the floor in an asylum. Whatever I do I will have to be specific about the wish to avoid negative consequences. So what did I want, what was my life missing? Well I had no control, no real future available to me. I wanted opportunity not fettered by my birth. I want control over who I am and who I will be. I wanted a long life so I could spend it growing. I wanted magic, not the dreary average that my life has been up to now. OK so what would allow me all that, but leave me the flexibility to rules lawyer the hell out of my wish. How to turn the game back on her and get what I want.This book''s true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience. A game, that was it. A game would allow me to make the rules limit the variables, prevent as many twists as possible. Best bet would be to go the role-playing route, allows for magic, long-lived races like elves, and she did mention something like classes. I wanted real flexibility going, so a skill-based route would be best. ¡°OK, I will need time to think up my next two wishes. However, I want some privacy, I don¡¯t want to make a mistake while thinking aloud and end up with another grapefruit.¡± ¡°As you wish boy, just give me a rub when you are ready. I¡¯ve got all eternity and a huge Netflix queue to get through.¡±, she smirked as she dissolved into purple smoke and flowed back into the grav...lamp. All right, so let¡¯s get down to it. I want a skill based system, that allows learning without having to be taught by another person or books alone. There needed to be a help system, so I could get explanations of the spells, stats, skills, etc. There needs to be magic both the wizard type and the cleric type. I wanted many races other than humans. Now I need to stack the deck a little in my favor. I want to understand all languages written, spoken, and signed. I don¡¯t want there to be any mistakes due to language. I want to have the longest lifespan possible, to give me plenty of time to learn. Hell, while I¡¯m at it let¡¯s do the whole unable to truly die thing like in video games. That should cover the first wish, I think for the second one I will ask for an out if things go bad. To be returned to the exact point and time I placed me world transplant wish. I spent all night going over my option eventually writing down a list of items to present to the genie. I want to be transplanted into a world of magic with the following characteristics:
  1. World will have a skill based system, said system will allow for learning via personal experience as well as through teaching and books.
  2. A help system like mechanic will be available to provide explanations of various world mechanics when queried.
  3. Magic in the world must allow for various types both arcane and divine
  4. World must have various races other than human to include elves, dwarves, gnomes, halflings, orcs, inter species mixes, and others.
  5. In this world I will understand all written, spoken, and signed languages
  6. I will have the longest lifespan available.
  7. A save system like video games
I can¡¯t think of anything else so it¡¯s now or never. I reached for the lamp and rubbed it vigorously, watching as purple smoke spiraled out of the spout and formed into the Merielle. ¡°I was right in the middle of Stranger Things season 2, this better be good! Are you finally ready to make your wishes boy?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve prepared a list for my first wish. I¡¯m assuming it will not be beyond your abilities?¡± Merielle grabbed the list from my hand and began to review it. Her lips pursed as she read, going over each item in turn. She set the list down on the desk and began to tap her index finger against her lips in thought. ¡°It¡¯s not beyond my abilities, but I¡¯m not sure it counts as just one wish. There are many items on this list, just going by the numbered items alone I could be justified in saying there are seven wishes.¡± ¡°No way 7 wishes, they are interconnected! The world based items are parameters for the world. The character specifics are also parameters for a single wish. Just because I¡¯m specific doesn¡¯t mean you can cheat me out of my wishes!¡± ¡°Hmm, here is what I will do. I can do all this with your remaining two wishes, but after that we are done, that¡¯s my final offer. I like you kid, but I do have to get back to my Netflix queue.¡± Having it counts as two wishes was not what I wanted. I would be out the safety wish, but do I want to come back to all this. A crappy life with no real opportunities. I¡¯m pretty sure I covered by bases well enough with the list to not be overly screwed by Merielle. What the hell, I¡¯ve got nothing of worth to lose! ¡°Deal! So how do we do this?¡± ¡°Simple, say that you wish to use your remaining wishes to fulfill the items on the provided list.¡± Grabbing the list in my hand I reviewed it one more time, then took a deep breath. ¡°I wish to use my remaining wishes to fulfill the items provided on the list.¡± ¡°As you wish!¡± Chapter 3: Well this is an Unexpected Turn of Events. After she spoke her last words everything went dark, like inky no hint of light blackness. The sudden lack of light was followed by the feeling of being stretched. At first, it was a pleasant sensation, like stretching after waking up in the morning. Then it started to feel like the dull burning pain you get when you try and touch your toes with your hands. That swiftly changed to feeling like my extremities were being ripped from their sockets, followed by the body shuddering shock of my arms and legs actually being ripped out of their sockets. I howled in pain as the muscles in my body started to pull apart, tendons snapping as they disconnected from my joints, muscles shredding as the pulling continued. Suddenly the pain changed, the force stretching and pulling reversed and I felt myself being compressed and crushed. It felt as if I was a hunk of clay, and a child was molding and rolling me into a ball. New painful sensations of pressure followed by the snapping of my bones entered my consciousness. The snapped bones stabbed into my organs as the pressure continued. The bones themselves began being ground down being mashed into the pulp that was once my organs, and all the while I remained conscious and aware of each piece of destruction and accompanying pain. And then it was over.
Welcome to Edelas! Body reconfiguration has been completed per specified parameters. Analysis of prior skill and abilities has been finalized and integration with new body has been completed where possible. Have a nice day, sucker!
That hurt a lot, I mean there doesn''t exist words in the English language to truly express how bad that was. I was still mentally wallowing in how painful my previous experience was I didn''t even bother to read the large blue box taking up a third of my vision. I think mistakes were made, yeah I''m almost certain I''m going to get screwed I thought as I read the text. After I fully read the text the box disappeared from in front of me. My vision cleared I looked at my surroundings. There seemed to be a soft green glow in the area that illuminated my surroundings. I was lying on the ground, which was covered in dirt, pebbles, and an assortment of rocks. In front and behind me a path extended, lit enough that I could see a good distance before everything became dark. To my sides of the path I was on, there were rock walls, giving off little sparkles in the dull green light, as granite does in the sunlight. At the base of the walls were large mushrooms some of which were larger than I was. The ceiling of the tunnel was high enough that the green glow gave way to darkness. Random sounds, that I could feel in my body as if I was holding a speaker up to my chest, came farther along each direction in the tunnel. The sounds themselves were not loud and did not seem near to me but it was disconcerting. The faint trickling of water was coming from the walls of the tunnel, probably water traveling down the rocks and providing the only source of liquid for the mushrooms to grow. The fact that I could hear so much, beyond what I remember from my previous body made me think I may be some sort of elf or other race with superior hearing. I decided to get up and explore my immediate surroundings and get a good look at where and who I was, but there was a problem. My body wouldn''t respond, attempt to move my neck, arms, legs anything really beyond my eyes didn''t seem to work. Just my luck, I thought. I arrive in a place of magic and adventure a quadriplegic. I was destined to die lying on the floor of a tunnel either from dehydration and starvation, or being eaten by some roving monster. I remembered part of my wish was a help system. I tried to call out the word help, but no sound came out. Now even more worried I tried to think a command. Help
For more information on a specific command state HELP command-name Abilities Character Sheet Equipment Inventory Save Settings Skills Spells Status Time
Ok, at least that worked. If I''m paralyzed or something that should be a status. Let''s try that command first. Status
Current Character Status
Freaked Out - User doesn''t know what the hell is going on causing him to cry like a little girl who had her sucker stolen. Man Up!
That''s rude, anyone in their right mind would be upset after going through that torture and finding themselves unable to move.
New Title Achieved: Whiny Bitch - Some people are people of action, others would rather spend their time bitching and moaning about how unfair life is. Guess which one you are?
Fantastic, stuck alone in the dark, paralyzed with only a jackass to keep me company. Ok, so still can''t move but it doesn''t look like it''s a status affliction. Maybe the Character Sheet may clear things up. Character Sheet
Name Marcus Hardy Race Slime Class NA
Titles Whiny Bitch
Mental
Intelligence Wisdom Concentration Mana Mana Regeneration
80 5 42 790 42/Minute
Physical
Strength Dexterity Constitution HP Health Regeneration
5 5 25 50 15/Minute
Social
Charisma Beauty Luck Social Bonus
5 0* 5 0%
Resistances
Air --------------------------------------------- .5% Water -------------------------------------------- .5% Earth -------------------------------------------- .5% Fire -------------------------------------------- .5% Acid ------------------------------------------ 52.5% Light ---------------------------------------------------- .5% Dark ---------------------------------------------------- .5% Magic ---------------------------------------------------- .5% Poison -------------------------------------------------- 2.5% Mental --------------------------------------------------- .5%
Abilities Skills
Cunning Linguist High School Graduate 299/500
Gelatinous Body Ditch Digger 100/500
Slimy
Acid Touch
If I could scream I would trust me I tried for about 5 minutes but no sound came out and screaming in your head isn''t remotely cathartic. I''m screwed, like bend me over the counter forget the lube say thank you to the large man named Bubba screwed. Somewhere I messed up on my wishlist because slime was not an outcome I had considered. I knew Merielle had to follow the list, but apparently, I''m not as smart as I thought though looking at my stats perhaps I should say I''m not as wise as I thought. All right, as much as I would like to continue to wallow in my own self-pity let''s see what I''ve gotten myself into. Help Slime
Slime
You are a slime. A gooey, amorphous blob of acid. You are a queasy oily shade of green that just about everything finds repugnant. While capable of living indefinitely most rarely do as they are murdered happily by every sentient and most monsters. You are a paragon of your race as you actually have a mind, while your compatriots are basically stomachs attached to a rudimentary nervous system. You have a number of natural abilities as a slime which include: Gelatinous Body, Slimy, and Acid Touch.
So I did get exactly what I asked for. I requested a long-lived raced and I got one, in fact, if one of my other items on the list didn''t get messed up I am immortal. Immortality stuck as an intelligent blob of acid which currently seems to lack any perks. Maybe my abilities will make up somewhat, for this. Abilities
Cunning Linguist
There exists no language you cannot speak or read...well since you have no mouth the speaking thing might pose a challenge.
Gelatinous Body
You are a mass of quivering jelly shaped like a teardrop. Piercing and Slashing weapons do 1/3 their normal damage. You can also mold your body to a diameter/width of 5cm.
Slimy
You are slimy and slippery, grabbing hold of you is extremely difficult.
Acid Touch - Current Damage 12(Con/2)
You know that slick slippery stuff covering your entire being, it''s acidic. No hugs for you. Bonus it causes damage. Damage is equivalent to your Constitution/2. You are immune to your own nastiness, and receive a 50% boost to acid resistance
Wishlist item fulfilled, I can at least understand other languages.If I''m a slime and have no mouth, then it stands to reason I have no ears either. How am I hearing the noises around me without ears? If I''m acidic, but also able to hold a shape, then I must have some sort of membrane holding my insides inside and preventing me from forming a puddle of goo on the floor. So if I''m surrounded by a membrane and an ear essentially works by air vibrations impacting a membrane and the brain translating those signals into a recognizable sound, does that mean that the sounds I''m hearing are simply vibrations impacting my membrane and being translated by my mind? How much control do I have over my outer membrane? Assuming from the description I can eat then the membrane must be semi-permeable otherwise I''d be full of rocks and dirt by now. So the fact that I''m not full of trash makes me think that my membrane can at least allow the passage of objects which is most likely done by instinct, but since I''m intelligent can I control what I ingest? If I''m capable of fine control of my membrane enough to mold my body and ingest only certain items can I manipulate it in other ways? A speaker is a membrane that vibrates causing sound, can I vibrate my membrane (giggity) and produce sound as well? Can I talk without a mouth then? Right now it might be hard, trying to move my body the old way doesn''t seem to have worked out. How do slimes even move, do I extend a pseudopod and creep forward? Do I roll around like a ball? I concentrated for a bit, attempting to reach out with my body as if crawling forward. I watched as a single thick pseudopod stretched out in front of me reaching a small distance away. I continued to focus and tried to flow toward the extension moving my mass from one part of my body to the extended part, and in a rush, my body flowed into the extension moving me forward. I practiced for a bit, until moving about didn''t require concentration on my part and became instinctual. It wasn''t a fast way to travel, but when you are a slime you have to work with what you have. Knowing that with concentration I was able to manipulate my body, I tried something different. Concentrating on a portion of my membrane I tried to move it quickly in place, essentially vibrating it in a hope to produce a sound. After several minutes I had succeeded in producing a humming sound, with a small amount of variation. I''d also succeeded in giving myself a massive headache in the process. Considering my current progress I felt it was good enough for now and I needed a break and returned to reviewing my character sheet.Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences. First let''s see about intelligence. It was one of my highest stats and it was curious about what it exactly did. I didn''t feel any more intelligent than before, but it was so far beyond most of my stats Help Intelligence
Intelligence - 80 (Base 5+High School Graduate Level Bonuses(20(Unskilled Levels Total Bonus)+25(Apprentice Levels Total Bonus)+30(Journeyman Levels Total Bonus))
Intelligence represents both intellectual capacity. This determines your mana and how quickly you learn new things. Intelligence directly impacts spell damage. It can increase via magic items and skill increases. As with all attribute stats there is no limit to the amount of Intelligence someone can have.
High School education is apparently worth something. If the base if 5 intelligence and there is no upper limit where does that put me in regards to the rest of the intelligent population? I''m I a genius, a moron, average? Help High SchoolGraduate
High School Graduate - Level 299(Journeyman)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Intelligence Attribute 2 Concentration Attribute 3
You graduated high school, well almost.While not impressive in your formal life you now know regarding science, mathematics etc. that surpasses knowledge available the primitive screwheads who currently inhabit this world. Twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington not included.
At least the help system has good taste in movies. Four years in high schooldidn''t make me a genius, I am SHOCKED. It improved my intelligence and concentration but the big bonus is that my knowledge of science and math is beyond the majority of this world''s population. That''s not saying they aren''t intelligent, it''s just their knowledge is in different areas. I''m confused about the attribute system. This skill obviously impacted intelligence, but did the second attribute impact Concentration? Help Concentration
Concentration -42 (Base 5+High School Graduate Level Bonuses(10(Unskilled Levels Total Bonus)+12(Apprentice Levels Total Bonus)+15(Journeyman Levels Total Bonus))
Concentration is your ability to focus on a task. Lack of concentration leads you to jump between subjects like a raccoon on crystal meth. This impacts your mana regeneration. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Concentration someone can have.
A skills second attribute is divided in half, and I''m assuming if it had a third attribute it would be divided by a third. How many attributes can a skill have? Can it have no attributes? Help Attributes
Attributes are grouped into 3 categories Mental, Physical, and Social. Mental includes Intelligence, Wisdom, and Concentration. Physical includes Strength, Dexterity, and Constitution. Social includes Charisma, Luck, and Beauty. For more information think HELP and the individual attribute
Well, that''s not that helpful at all. I decided to take the rest of the time to quickly review the rest of the stats and items on my character sheet. Only two things stood out one of which was that I was apparently never going to get anything in the Beauty stat due to my race, Not really all that upsetting as I''m used to Charisma and the like being dump stats, only losers choose bards. The other item was the save command:
Save
You can save your current state and location. At any time or upon death you can reload and try again. You OP slave scumming bastard.
It looks like there is only one save space, so I have to be careful to save often and preferably not in a spot that would have me die over and over again due to poor planning. I''ve played a few games that my poor planning made me have to start from the beginning losing hours of progress. This was worse as there was no starting over, either I spend eternity reliving the same death or...die permanently. I quickly saved now while I had the chance. Using the setting function I put my HP and Mana at the very top of my screen and added a combat log and status log to the right of my screen minimized so it wouldn''t be a distraction. Now it''s time to explore! Character Sheet:
Name Marcus Hardy Race Slime Class NA
Titles Whiny Bitch
Mental
Intelligence Wisdom Concentration Mana Mana Regeneration
80 5 42 790 42/Minute
Physical
Strength Dexterity Constitution HP Health Regeneration
5 5 25 50 15/Minute
Social
Charisma Beauty Luck Social Bonus
5 0* 5 0%
Resistances
Air ------------------------------------------- .5% Water ------------------------------------------- .5% Earth ------------------------------------------ .5% Fire ------------------------------------------- .5% Acid ---------------------------------------- 52.5% Light --------------------------------------------------- .5% Dark --------------------------------------------------- .5% Magic --------------------------------------------------- .5% Poison ------------------------------------------------- 2.5% Mental -------------------------------------------------- .5%
Abilities Skills
Cunning Linguist High School Graduate 299/500
Gelatinous Body Ditch Digger 100/500
Slimy
Acid Touch
Slime
You are a slime. A gooey, amorphous blob of acid. You are a queasy oily shade of green that just about everything finds repugnant. While capable of living indefinitely most rarely do as they are murdered happily by every sentient and most monsters. You are a paragon of your race as you actually have a mind, while your compatriots are basically stomachs attached to a rudimentary nervous system. You have a number of natural abilities as a slime which include: Gelatinous Body, Slimy, and Acid Touch.
Save
You can save your current state and location. At any time or upon death you can reload and try again. You OP slave scumming bastard.
Cunning Linguist
There exists no language you cannot speak or read...well since you have no mouth the speaking thing might pose a challenge.
Gelatinous Body
You are a mass of quivering jelly shaped like a teardrop. Piercing and Slashing weapons do 1/3 their normal damage. You can also mold your body to a diameter/width of 5cm.
Slimy
You are slimy and slippery, grabbing hold of you is extremely difficult.
Acid Touch - Current Damage 12(Con/2)
You know that slick slippery stuff covering your entire being, it''s acidic. No hugs for you. Bonus it causes damage. Damage is equivalent to your Constitution/2. You are immune to your own nastiness, and receive a 50% boost to acid resistance
Intelligence - 80 (Base 5+High School Graduate Level Bonuses(20(Unskilled Levels Total Bonus)+25(Apprentice Levels Total Bonus)+30(Journeyman Levels Total Bonus))
Intelligence represents both intellectual capacity. This determines your mana and how quickly you learn new things. Intelligence directly impacts spell damage. It can increase via magic items and skill increases. As with all statsthere is no limit to the amount of Intelligence someone can have.
Wisdom
Wisdom is your ability to make good choices. Often referred to as common sense. Wisdom helps you avoid making poor decisions such as trying to outsmart an ageless magic being of unbelievable cosmic power utilizing a high school education and a few hours of thought. This impacts your mana regeneration and provides .1% resistance to all magical effects per point. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Wisdom someone can have.
Concentration -42 (Base 5+High School Graduate Level Bonuses(10(Unskilled Levels Total Bonus)+12(Apprentice Levels Total Bonus)+15(Journeyman Levels Total Bonus))
Concentration is your ability to focus on a task. Lack of concentration leads you to jump between subjects like a raccoon on crystal meth. This impacts your mana regeneration. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Concentration someone can have.
Strength
Strength is what determines if you will be He-Man or Girly-Man. It impacts the max weight you can carry and not be encumbered(Str * 5=Number of Kilograms.) It also impacts health regeneration. Certain skills utilize this stat to determine the damage caused. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Strength someone can have.
Dexterity
Dexterity is utilized in skills to determine your ranged attack damage, ability to avoid damage, your ability to finely manipulate objects, and your speed. It can increase via magic items or skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Dexterity someone can have.
Constitution - 25 (Base 5+Ditch Digger Level Bonuses(20(Unskilled level Bonus)
This is your ability to take damage, withstand negative physical effects, and in your case actually cause damage. HP is twice your Constitution score. It also plays a role in health regeneration. Constitution provides a .1% bonus per point to Acid and Poison resistance. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Constitution someone can have.
Charisma
Through the power of your personality, you can influence others. Charisma along with the other social stats are used to determine your social bonus. Charisma will directly impact skills that rely on communication with others. it can increase via magic items or skill increases.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Charisma someone can have.
Luck
Luck is what gives you that little extra edge. It makes the difference between winning the lotto and losing. It determines the quality of loot drops and can influence all skills and spells. How it does so is known only to the gods.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Luck someone can have.
Beauty
Beauty, the ability to influence others based on your physical appearance. Pretty people have it easier in life their very appearance influencing others actions toward them positively. You, on the other hand, are a disgusting ball of acidic snot.As with all stats there is no limit to the amount of Beauty someone can have.
Social Bonus
The average of your charisma and beauty stats this bonus influences all your interactions with others. This can provide bonuses when selling or buying equipment, etc. As you are ugly and cannot speak you get nothing in this stat. Sucks to be you.
Health Regeneration
Amount of health you regenerate per minute. Determined by the average of your Strength and Constitution score rounded down.
Mana Regeneration
Amount of mana you regenerate per minute. Determined by the average of your Wisdom and Concentration score rounded down.
Ditch Digger - Level 100(Apprentice)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Constitution Attribute 2 Attribute3
A skill often used as an example of the least skilled and poor of society. Your vast experience in unskilled manual labor has transferred over, not sure what good it will do you without hands but that''s your problem, not mine.
High School Graduate - Level 299(Journeyman)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Intelligence Attribute 2 Concentration Attribute3
You graduated high school, well almost.While not impressive in your formal life you now know regarding science, mathematics etc. that surpasses knowledge available the primitivescrewheadswho currently inhabit this world. Twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington not included.
Chapter 4: I will NOM all the things! I oozed my way over toward the mushrooms that were up against the walls of the tunnel. The walls themselves did appear to be of some sort of granite material and the flashes of the crystal within the material shone even more as I came closer. Stopping I turned around and looked back, but the light that was with me in the middle of the tunnel had followed me. Looking about I couldn¡¯t see anything external that would be the source of the light, no fairy or glowing light orb. Focusing on extending a portion of my body farther away than I had before I was able to finally see a portion of myself. My body glistened wetly in the green glow that appeared to emanate from my body. It looks like I was bioluminescent as well as acidic and amorphous. I¡¯d take any advantage I could get right now, but I could see how it would pose a problem if I ever needed to be stealthy. I would have to investigate later, but right now I needed a distraction of the world around me to help ignore my current bodily situation. I moved closer to the mushroom to get a clearer view. They all seemed to be of the same type, the only difference appeared to be the size. Some were smaller than me by half, while others dwarfed me appearing as tall as trees to my mind. The mushroom caps were a dark color moving toward a lighter on the top. The edge of the cap had a melted appearance with parts of it resembling dripping wax. The stem of the mushroom was a lighter color as well. Exact colors were difficult to determine due to my glow giving everything a green cast. The cap could have been black, blue or red for all I could tell. I reached out an arm and gave one of the smaller mushrooms a push, not sure if disturbing them would cause a reaction or do nothing. In this case, it did nothing just moved a tiny bit and stayed rooted to the soil. Well here goes nothing...SAVE. I enveloped the mushroom. It had a bland, almost waxy consistency.
Candlemaker Mushroom 1/03
The Candlemaker Mushroom is a common mushroom often found underground. Named after the dripping wax look it has several alchemical uses. While not poisonous, it has no nutritional value.
  1. The Candlemaker Mushroom can burn for an extended period of time and can be used as a light source.
  2. ???
  3. ???
Skill Unlock: Gourmet!
Gourmet - Level 1(Unskilled)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Constitution Attribute 2 NA Attribute 3 NA
While others follow the look but don¡¯t touch philosophy of observation you prefer a more hands or stomach on approach. By ingesting items you will learn more about the item or object. Items that are not readily susceptible to your acid will have a countdown listed until they are digested. A higher your skill will allow you to learn more about the item you have ingested.
Whoa, I must NOM all the things! I wonder if the skill increases for every item I eat? I quickly ate 10 more mushrooms and checked my skill.
Gourmet - Level 2(Unskilled)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Constitution Attribute 2 NA Attribute 3 NA
While others follow the look but don¡¯t touch philosophy of observation you prefer a more hands or stomach on approach. By ingesting items you will learn more about the item or object. Items that are not readily susceptible to your acid will have a countdown listed until they are digested. A higher your skill will allow you to learn more about the item you have ingested.
So a point every 10 items ingested? If that is true I could power level the hell out of this skill, though that seemed way too easy. Well the mushrooms weren¡¯t going anywhere and are pretty common so I will come back to that, but for now back to exploration. Since neither direction looked more promising than the next I chose at random and oozed down the tunnel, but remained close to the tunnel edge to use the mushrooms as camouflage. I oozed down the tunnel I practiced making sounds with my membrane. Various blats and blurts echoed down the tunnel as I focused on changing the pitch of the sounds I could make. I blame my intense focus on improving my communication abilities, and not because I¡¯m a complete Derp that I didn¡¯t notice the snake until it bit me. Granite Snake Deals 5 Piercing Damage You are poisoned Damage - 2/HP per second for 20 Seconds. An icy chill ran through my body, followed by sharp painful contractions flowing through my body. It most definitely sucked, it sucked large hairy monkey balls. That¡¯s 45 damage total and that is with the ? less damage from piercing and my poison resist! Granite Snake takes 12 Acid Damage The snake itself was huge compared to me. It¡¯s head was larger than my entire body and it¡¯s scales glittered like granite in my green light. It opened its mouth to hiss at me, in preparation for another bite. I needed to solve this problem quick because dying required me being bit again and I could easily deal without feeling that pain. Well there¡¯s only one option that will stop him from biting me again. LEEERRROOOYYY JEEENNNKKIIINNNSS!!! With a lurch I oozed into its mouth and down its gullet. He can¡¯t bite me when I¡¯m inside, and my acid resistance should help with any digestive acid. Granite Snake takes 12 Acid Damage 2 HP Poison Damage Granite Snake takes 12 Acid Damage 2 HP Poison Damage No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!!!! Now that I was inside my focus was staying inside the snake as it was doing its best to puke me up. Luckily I was naturally slippery and his throat muscles couldn¡¯t get a good grip. Granite Snake takes -12 Acid Damage -2 HP Poison Damage Granite Snake takes -12 Acid Damage -2 HP Poison Damage Granite Snake takes -12 Acid Damage -2 HP Poison Damage Granite Snake takes -12 Acid Damage -2 HP Poison Damage Granite Snake takes -12 Acid Damage -2 HP Poison Damage Granite Snake - Killed - 10:00 Minutes until digestion complete Bit off more than you could chew! Haha...the silence was resounding. No one appreciates a good joke - 2 HP Poison Damage +4 HP per minute/10 minute Food Healing Bonus That was new, I wonder if I didn¡¯t get healed from the mushroom because it had no nutritional value. Well at that rate I should be totally healed by the time I was done eating him. So I just sat and ate as apparently I had 10 minutes to spare. Granite snake tastes like chicken dropped in dirt, not appetizing in the slightest.
Granite Snake 1/03
Granite snakes are indigenous to underground areas or locations with abnormally high concentrations of Earth Mana. The snake''s scales are infused with earth mana offering increased armor rating and resistance to air, fire, and earth effects.
  1. Scales of the Granite Snake can be utilized in minor stone skin potions
  2. ???
  3. ???
I can check Alchemy off on the magic world stereotype list. I wonder if it increased my Gourmet skill?
Gourmet - Level 3(Unskilled)
PrerequisiteReading on Amazon or a pirate site? This novel is from Royal Road. Support the author by reading it there. NA Attribute 1 Constitution Attribute 2 NA Attribute 3 NA
While others follow the look but don¡¯t touch philosophy of observation you prefer a more hands or stomach on approach. By ingesting items you will learn more about the item or object. Items that are not readily susceptible to your acid will have a countdown listed until they are digested. A higher your skill will allow you to learn more about the item you have ingested.
Eating something new gives me one skill point, eating the same thing again gives me diminishing returns. I¡¯ll have to keep testing to see how it scales. With a sigh I turned to mushrooms and began to eat. Character Sheet:
Name Marcus Hardy Race Slime Class NA
Titles Whiny Bitch
Mental
Intelligence Wisdom Concentration Mana Mana Regeneration
80 5 42 790 42/Minute
Physical
Strength Dexterity Constitution HP Health Regeneration
5 5 25 50 15/Minute
Social
Charisma Beauty Luck Social Bonus
5 0* 5 0%
Resistances
Air ------------------------------------------- .5% Water ------------------------------------------- .5% Earth ------------------------------------------ .5% Fire ------------------------------------------- .5% Acid ---------------------------------------- 52.5% Light --------------------------------------------------- .5% Dark --------------------------------------------------- .5% Magic --------------------------------------------------- .5% Poison ------------------------------------------------- 2.5% Mental -------------------------------------------------- .5%
Abilities Skills
Cunning Linguist High School Graduate 299/500
Gelatinous Body Ditch Digger 100/500
Slimy Gourmet 3/500
Acid Touch
Slime
You are a slime. A gooey, amorphous blob of acid. You are a queasy oily shade of green that just about everything finds repugnant. While capable of living indefinitely most rarely do as they are murdered happily by every sentient and most monsters. You are a paragon of your race as you actually have a mind, while your compatriots are basically stomachs attached to a rudimentary nervous system. You have a number of natural abilities as a slime which include: Gelatinous Body, Slimy, and Acid Touch.
Save
You can save your current state and location. At any time or upon death you can reload and try again. You OP slave scumming bastard.
Cunning Linguist
There exists no language you cannot speak or read...well since you have no mouth the speaking thing might pose a challenge.
Gelatinous Body
You are a mass of quivering jelly shaped like a teardrop. Piercing and Slashing weapons do 1/3 their normal damage. You can also mold your body to a diameter/width of 5cm.
Slimy
You are slimy and slippery, grabbing hold of you is extremely difficult.
Acid Touch - Current Damage 12(Con/2)
You know that slick slippery stuff covering your entire being, it''s acidic. No hugs for you. Bonus it causes damage. Damage is equivalent to your Constitution/2. You are immune to your own nastiness, and receive a 50% boost to acid resistance
Intelligence- 80 (Base 5+High School Graduate Level Bonuses(20(Unskilled Levels Total Bonus)+25(Apprentice Levels Total Bonus)+30(Journeyman Levels Total Bonus))
Intelligence represents both intellectual capacity. This determines your mana and how quickly you learn new things. Intelligence directly impacts spell damage. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.Aswithall statsthere is no limit to the amount of Intelligence someone can have.
Wisdom
Wisdom is your ability to make good choices. Often referred to as common sense. Wisdom helps you avoid making poor decisions such as trying to outsmart an ageless magic being of unbelievable cosmic power utilizing a high school education and a few hours of thought. This impacts your mana regeneration and provides .1% resistance to all magical effects per point. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Wisdom someone can have.
Concentration -42 (Base 5+High School Graduate Level Bonuses(10(Unskilled Levels Total Bonus)+12(Apprentice Levels Total Bonus)+15(Journeyman Levels Total Bonus))
Concentration is your ability to focus on a task. Lack of concentration leads you to jump between subjects like a raccoon on crystal meth. This impacts your mana regeneration. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Concentration someone can have.
Strength
Strength is what determines if you will be He-Man or Girly-Man. It impacts the max weight you can carry and not be encumbered(Str * 5=Number of Kilograms.) It also impacts health regeneration. Certain skills utilize this stat to determine the damage caused. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Strength someone can have.
Dexterity
Dexterity is utilized in skills to determine your ranged attack damage, ability to avoid damage, your ability to finely manipulate objects, and your speed. It can increase via magic items or skill increases.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Dexterity someone can have.
Constitution - 25 (Base 5+Ditch Digger Level Bonuses(20(Unskilled level Bonus)
This is your ability to take damage, withstand negative physical effects, and in your case actually cause damage. HP is twice your Constitution score. It also plays a role in health regeneration. Constitution provides a .1% bonus per point to Acid and Poison resistance. It can increase via magic items and skill increases.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Constitution someone can have.
Charisma
Through the power of your personality, you can influence others. Charisma along with the other social stats are used to determine your social bonus. Charisma will directly impact skills that rely on communication with others. it can increase via magic items or skill increases.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Charisma someone can have.
Luck
Luck is what gives you that little extra edge. It makes the difference between winning the lotto and losing. It determines the quality of loot drops and can influence all skills and spells. How it does so is known only to the gods.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Luck someone can have.
Beauty
Beauty, the ability to influence others based on your physical appearance. Pretty people have it easier in life their very appearance influencing others actions toward them positively. You, on the other hand, are a disgusting ball of acidic snot.As with allstatsthere is no limit to the amount of Beauty someone can have.
Social Bonus
The average of your charisma and beauty stats this bonus influences all your interactions with others. This can provide bonuses when selling or buying equipment, etc. As you are ugly and cannot speak you get nothing in this stat. Sucks to be you.
Health Regeneration
Amount of health you regenerate per minute. Determined by the average of your Strength and Constitution score rounded down.
Mana Regeneration
Amount of mana you regenerate per minute. Determined by the average of your Wisdom and Concentration score rounded down.
Ditch Digger - Level 100(Apprentice)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Constitution Attribute 2 Attribute 3
A skill often used as an example of the least skilled and poor of society. Your vast experience in unskilled manual labor has transferred over, not sure what good it will do you without hands but that''s your problem, not mine.
High School Graduate - Level 299(Journeyman)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Intelligence Attribute 2 Concentration Attribute 3
You graduated high school, well almost.While not impressive in your formal life you now know regarding science, mathematics etc. that surpasses knowledge available the primitive screwheads who currently inhabit this world. Twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington not included.
Gourmet - Level 3(Unskilled)
Prerequisite NA Attribute 1 Constitution Attribute 2 NA Attribute3 NA
While others follow the look but don¡¯t touch philosophy of observation you prefer a more hands or stomach on approach. By ingesting items you will learn more about the item or object. Items that are not readily susceptible to your acid will have a countdown listed until they are digested. A higher your skill will allow you to learn more about the item you have ingested.