《An Unhinged Author》 Chapter 0 - Well shit... (I''m not very good at setting up a story, so this might be short and I will be inconsistent with chapter updates. Also this is kind of a info dump) ~POV of Kent~ Some things don''t change, like my awe and admiration for whatever created the stars, and well, space. Space was always an interesting subject for me since I didn''t know much about, which is the basis for all human interests in research. If we don''t know about it, we might fear it, so we research it to get rid of that fear, while others research because they thirst for knowledge in general. Great minds all started from 0, and built itself up from 0, kind of like how the brain named itself the, "brain". But when we grasp that knowledge, we lose interest, which is why I like to repeat the saying, "Ignorance is bliss". It was very true for many occasions, so I, myself, keep myself in the dark with varying subjects since I like to savour that feeling of ''thirst'' that many have when they want to know about something. It might seem unorthodox for some, but it just works, so I do it. That''s also why in some stories that people create, the god is always disappointing in some way, since we put the existence of god on a pedastool, we would have expectations that the god would be magnificent and awe inspiring. Then when a character meets god, they become full of doubt which is reasonable, and are disappointed. So, that''s why the saying, "Ignorance is bliss", works in a lot of ways. So when I was murdered, and met god, that spark or ''thirst'' disappeared in a unfulfilling way. You see, the god that I met was a bit out of control, and just was what you would call, ''lazy'', since even though he or ''it'' created existence, it was out of whim and decided to do another thing out of whim which was kind a double edged sword for god, well in the metaphorical way. Apparently, since he can do absolutely anything, that also means that he could create something stronger than himself that even he couldn''t destroy with his power of being able to do anything, and that is what he did and created the "Protagonist System".This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there. The "Author System" was kind of like an A.I. that he created out of whim as I was saying earlier. The "Author System" picked random beings that would now be able to become more powerful than god in an instant, but that is if they wanted to, and if they didn''t want this power they could give it to someone else or kill themselves so they have a fresh start and forget everything. Many did this after becoming bored of the power they gained. Actually all of them did this after becoming bored, and then the A.I. would pick a new author, kind of like in one story where a dragon would pick the kings that would rule the kingdom. But instead of picking who were worthy, the A.I. was doing this randomly so it''s more like the dragon has a chance where it would pick a sadistic peasant and noone could do anything about it. Of course, I''m not a sadistic peasant, but a guy who''s more like a NEET, but not completely, since I did have a job, which was online gambling, you can say all you want about gambling not being a job but I don''t care. You can also see that I was a very lucky person up until I was murdered as you probably already realised. So I was pretty good at gambling on purely luck based games so it could be considered a job, and I was able to live just from my apartment. You could say that I was kind of normal since I never got in fights, or did anything a sadistic peasant would do. I also had a little hobby which was my little novel, whereIjust did whatever I wanted, and enacted some of the worst sins and acts a human could do, but I did it in that story. So I was pretty surprised when I opened my door to get my order of chinese food and instead of my order, I got a knife to the gut, well actually it was 26 stabs. You might be wondering why I know that number, but that''s just because my fat protected me from being stabbed in the vital parts so I bled to death instead of being stabbed in the heart or something like that. Also, all of the stuff about the A.I. and the system was told to me by god, so it could be a lie but I don''t really care since now I can be a NEET with powers strong enough to kill god. I plan on living in a forest, with my apartment, and I also plan on connecting everything technological to the internet and electricity plants on Earth so I can surf the internet while also being on a completely different planet. Chapter 1 - At least I have internet... (I have now decided that all chapters will be short since I will only be using this to exercise my imagination and to be productive when I''m bored, also everything will be written in "Present Tense".) God kind of just got gigantic in an instant, which surprised me at first, actually, who am I kidding I was surprised the whole time since he grabbed me and than threw me out into space and then suddenly I found myself in a room that looked like it was completely trashed. Wait, this looks like a literal example of, "it looks like a bomb went off in here". *Quiet Sobbing* My thought proccess was interrupted by the sound of someone quietly crying. When I tried to turn my head to see where the sound was coming from, I was surprised to notice that not only was there some guy in black clothing near the door holding a woman who I think sleeping, but also there was another baby right next to me. When I try to talk to the guy in black clothing, no words came out, only high pitched gibberish. Kent: "Oogagooa" WHAT.THE.ACTUAL.FUCK...I, of course had to recollect my thoughts as I of now am a baby that pees and shits it''s diapers then cries as if it was crying out for help to help clean it''s terrible messes that it, itself is responsible for. Disappointment, that is the emotion that filled me. I was disappointed in a lot of things at the moment, but most of all, that "All powerful God" has turned me into a baby, most of the disappointment was now directed towards that god. Now that I''ve recollected my thoughts, I decided to look at the guy who I tried to speak with but was met with extreme failure. There was an obvious look of shock on his face, which I did not know the cause of, as if he could hear my thoughts or something. Guy in black clothing: "H-h-how did I not know there w-was a-a-another. Oh my goodness, fate has hidden another child from all, even Voldemort did not know of another." WHAT, FUCKING VOLDEMORT WAS HERE. This means multiple things have happened since God threw me into the mysterious but beautiful place that is space. One of those things being that I''ve been thrown into the Harry Potter world, this is amazing! And I just finished the movies too, this is too good to be true, HA! Ok, so another thing is that either me or that other baby is probably the chosen one, or more correctly, his accidental horcrux. But from the way that guy who is probably Snape said that I was hidden from Voldemort by fate itself, probably means the other baby is Harry Potter.Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere. Fuck, well whatever, I don''t like attention anyways. Probably Snape: "Curious, this one has a wound too, however did that happen, maybe this one wasn''t actually hidden quite enough." Fuck off you piece of shit god, you''re probably listening on my thoughts at the moment, fucking do something to me. I dare ya! *ssssss* Kent: "WAAAAAAAAAA!" MOTHERFUCKER, he actually did it! He fucking sizzled my wound, and damn it hurts. I wonder how Harry was able to fucking handle this little shitstain of a scar everytime it hurt. Wait, maybe it just hurts this much because this little bitch of a god made it hurt more than possible. This god is quite the bitc-*BANG*FUCK! He just fucking made something explode. As I look around to see what this bi-wait, what thisthing has exploded, I notice that nothing was on fire and it looked like Snape wasn''t shocked or has even noticed that loud bang. Oh wait, I almost forgot that he isliterallygod, so it makes sense that he would make me hear an explosion instead of making something spontaneously combust. What a di-godda-motherfucker I can''t use curse words directed towards him or that g word without him doing some shit. Ok now that fiasco has ended without anyone being hurt except me, I notice that Snape has picked up Harry and is in the process of making me float with a levitation charm and kind of carrying me towards the exit to this house where the story of the boy who lived starts. Well I might as well surf the internet while I''m a baby for now, wait shit, I almost forgot that I''m in the 80''ties, the internet wasn''t even invented at this point in time, so how the fuck would I surf the internet? Brain storm ti-wait I''m such a fucking idiot, actually no, this is the fault of that god who dropped me here and overwhelmed me with a bunch of good stuff. I can edit reality, or rewrite it but then this story would be called RE:Write, so I''ll just call it editing. So I can just turn my soul into a soul computer so I can just surf the internet of my world, but how do I edit stuff? Oh, I guess that either I got a really good hunch or god just gave me an epiphany. *High pitched wine* Oh fuck! That hurt real bad, I guess it wouldn''t be so good for your soul to suddenly become a fucking soul computer connected to the entirety of an internet that is possibly in a different reality. But hey, at least I get to look at memes when I''m bored which is cool and then I could look up spells to practice, cuz who doesn''t want to experience the whole thing of learning spells from Harry Potter. Fucking I will disagree with whoever wouldn''t want to learn spells through work, that''s where the real spirit is! But I will not fight with them since that would be stupid. *Proceeding to go to Jfunny and look at memes* Kent: "*giggle*" Snape: "This one is very energetic and doesn''t seem to be fazed very much at all, I should tell Dumbledore to see what he thinks of this." Oh shit, I probably shouldn''t be energetic and unfazed, I guess a baby would be crying or seem to be fazed by the fact that the one who took care of them was murdered in front of them. Well whatever, now onto what I was laughing at was a picture of two people robbing a bank with pikacu masks and has the caption of "Wow, payda 2 is getting weird". I mean, how would that not be funny since payda 2 does have some weird masks. Chapter 2 - Time skip with a bit of exposition and before Hogwarts October 31st 1981 I never really read the books, so I guess I could read the books when I''m bored. Actually, it would be better than watching the movies again since I would get more details, and I would''ve known that book Hagrid was a lot bigger than movie Hagrid. Book Hagrid was even able to hold both of us with one hand while flying through the sky on a bike towards where I can only assume to be Dumbledore and McGonagall who are in front of the Dursley''s house. Then I noticed that we were probably closing in on the house since Hagrid was lowering the height of the bike and we were dropping at a comfortable pace, not like dropping down the side of a building without a parachute, but it was more like we were dropping slightly slower than someone dropping down a building with a parachute. It was so comfortable that I was actually tired and Harry was sleeping soundly, I wonder why I''m not sleeping and he''s not the one that isn''t sleeping. But I could just be tired because I''m a baby that needs sleep. But I guess since he was the one that witnessed the murder of our parents or at least our mother in person, or in baby, while I only watched the movie and saw some poor movie effects of our mother dying. But it could be due to god literally fucking throwing me into space and causing me to become the brother of Harry! At this point, we''re about to land and then Hagrid stops the levitation charm which causes the bike to fall normally, or the most normal a giant motorcycle can fall. Straight away the bike hits the ground and a few cracks slither out from underneath the wheels from where the wheels hit the ground, possibly because Hagrid is fucking half giant or Hagrid being half giant coupled with the giant bike. I''m guessing Hagrid wasn''t expecting the ground to crack from under him as he cursed a little and then decided to leave it there. (I''m also going to leave those cracks there for later when tension probably needs to be lifted) Both of them, McGonagall and Dumbledore notice that there were two bundles of blankets and McGonagall immediately assumed that Hagrid took something from the house since I guess literally noone knew there was another child. McGonagall: "Hagrid, what did you take from their house!?" Hagrid: "Calm down Ms. McGonagall. There was another child with Harry in the house, Snape told me this one was a bit strange though, since this one was also scarred." Dumbledore: "Scarred? What do you mean, why would they have scars, Hagrid?" Hagrid: "I don''t know either, but Snape says it could be from when Vol-I mean You-know-who attacked them and Lily protected them..." Dumbledore: "..." McGonagall: "..." Hagrid: "..." It all of a sudden got awkward and silent between the the three of them, or they''re feeling conflicted with something, but whatever it is, I don''t really care since I''m just a baby. I should probably act like a baby too but that just seems weird, and I don''t have any experience acting like a baby since I''ve never had that fetish or did that kind of play, nor did I know or have anyone to do that kind of stuff with. I''ll just sleep a lot, that''s much easier. There''s that feeling again, that feeling of gaining an epiphany, but this time it feels more like it''s exploding out from inside of my head instead of something entering my head. Maybe, just maybe, God isn''t such a bad guy. *DING* Oh now you understand. Since you''ve finally given me somewhat of a compliment, and have realised my greatness, I shall gift you with pure talent for everything, from walking, breathing, and even gaining energy from rest, to activating the most powerful spells and making new ones, to concocting the most useful and powerful potions. Also you can make new potions. That is straight up overpowered, ok, so you''re actually pretty nice, that is what I finally realise... ... ... Damnit, so you aren''t such an easy person to make happy, you pr-wait that would be bad since I could lose my new talents. My though process is again interrupted by Dumbledore placing the bundles of rags that we are in and then placing a letter in between the both of us. That is what was supposed to happen but because the letter was bigger and I was smaller than Harry, the letter was covering my vision, so that''s kind of annoying. So I''ll just let time go by while I sleep, for abooouuut 16 hours every 24 hours, might be too much but the Dursley''s wouldn''t care since that''s one less child of the their freak siblings, well in their eyes since I could be called godly by anyone who knew of my powers.
About 10 years later Aunt Petun-bitch wakes both Harry and me up with her knocking while screeching with her obnoxious and loud voice seething with poison comparable to the witch of the west from that movie I watched with my parents when was younger. Well, I was 99% sleeping as I made it so when I sleep, my consciousness always go into a pocket dimension I made where I have my ideal body, which is a trap and has a big penis, I did that penis part on a whim. Of course I got up quicker than Harry and so I flicked one of the few toys we had at his forehead to completely wake him up so the both of us wouldn''t get in trouble, the effected worked quickly and Harry was up on top of his feet in 2 seconds getting ready to throw the toy back with an innocent smile on his face. We were what some might call the best friends to eachother, as I never had a friend mostly due to the fact that I was bullied for my body and Harry was bullied by Dudley and our uncle and aunt. So it just kind of worked out like that. Harry was the first one to leave, why I didn''t go out first was because I had trouble getting out since I was 2 heads taller than Harry, which is due to my constant sleeping. I never realised how bad it was to be tall in a small room, as I always banged my head and my neck was sore most of the mornings. I could totally use my editing to get rid of the soreness or make my body more durable, but I believe the past is what makes a person, and a few other philosophical sayings. I''ve always wanted to be the good guy that always indirectly spits in the face of poisonous people, but the internet just kind of corrupted me into the me that swears a lot and thinks of some nasty plots for some people that annoy me or poisonous people. Aunt Petun-bitch: "Get a move on you two!" Poisonous people like her are my favorite for brewing some nasty plots. One time I used a levitation charm, without a wand of course, to make her skirt float up which filled Dudley''s vision probably with something disgusting, as I imagine since everything about her rubs me the wrong way. Of course I lifted the charm before she noticed and now I think Dudley is mentally scarred which of course brings grief to Aunt Petun-bitch and Uncle Ver-min. Noone knows about me using magic since I used my editing, which kind of defeats the purpose of one of my used philosophical sayings, but I only use it when I want. I also hid the fact that I use magic because I want to get my letter at the same time as Harry so it brings double the trouble for them, mostly because of all the letters that they''ll have to pick up if they don''t allow me or Harry to open and read the letters. Dudley also wasn''t really able to pick on Harry as much since I was always hanging out with him, and because I''m taller than both of them so I was a bit intimidating to him, but that''s just my guess that I made with a little bit of editing. My body, was of course a bit stronger than Harry since I wanted to be super fit as I never was in my old life due to my overeating, so while Harry is slender, I''m slim. But sometimes I really work Dudley up so sometimes when I''m sleeping, he''ll pull on my long man ponytail, which is like almost the only thing that hurts that he does to me. Oh yeah, I have a pony tail since I made my body a little feminine due to tastes, but I am straight, just I want to be cute, so I made my hair grow about 2.5 times the speed of Harry but it ends at a 1 foot length, it might be too much but whatever. So you could say I''m a bit of trap since I also have some effeminate features. (This might not be the end of my obvious expositions during chapters so be ready) While Harry had bright green eyes which emphasized his innocense and energy while I have pale green eyes that have nothing to do with my personality and I just did that because it looks nice. well maybe paleness can be translated into sleepyness or acting like a sloth but I don''t know.The narrative has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the infringement. Uncle Ver-min: "Comb your hair you mess of a boy and you should get your hair cut unless I have to pull it off you!" Uncle Ver-min does his usual morning insults to our hair, first time I heard that when my haircut was made the way I like it, I put glue into his hair gel container, of course he blamed it on the both us since he had to vent out his anger and didn''t give us a meal for 3 lunch times and 3 dinner times, but I had to feed my brother and myself so I made pieces of their food disappear and appear in my hands and then gave them to Harry since I''m still hiding the fact I can use magic from him. After reading the first few chapters in boredom of the Harry Potter books, I realised that he was supposed to only demand and not demand and insult only once a week. But now it happens every morning, and he doesn''t enforce what he say''s since I guess he thinks that he''s being watched by those "freaks". I quite liked spoiling Harry since it brought a feeling happiness and fulfilment that I never experienced in my past life, it was really nice I tell you, I guess this is why some parents like to spoil their children. So a few times he was able to catch on the fact that I was doing something strange. But I don''t think he knows that it''s magic specifically, it''ll be a mess when he realises that I was able to use magic at such a young age but that''s ok. Thankfully to the absurd amount of talent given to me by God, I''m able to make some pretty good meals, meals that are much better than Aunt Petun-bitch''s meals that she''s made only a couple times and then we started cooking. Everyone in the house, or those three, knows that I''m good at cooking so they force everything onto me. Thankfully, my innocent and kind brother lifts about half of the burden and hoists onto himself to carry which I think is what every parent wants to see, isn''t it? But I guess I''m not really a parent, but a brother that spoils his sibling. Geez, now that I think about, I''ve really changed ever since I became the brother of Harry, or actually ever had a sibling. I never stopped to think that having a sibling would be so good and would bring you a ton of happiness. Man, I''ve changed. Harry: "Kent get ready, we''re going to the zoo." Kent: "Oh really? Maybe you''ll get to see the lions, or even hear their mighty roars! Rooaar! " Harry: "*Giggling*" Uncle Ver-min yelling in from outside: "You two get over here, get inside the car before I drag you inside!" Heh, this is such a pure situation, and it''s fun, I really don''t want this to end. But soon we''ll have to go to Hogwarts and then the light situations like this will disappear soon after, ugh I might as well savour these things as much as I can.
A few minutes later We''re walking through the zoo looking at the animals, while Dudley is being obnoxious by doing his, "Oooooh"s and "Awwww"s which I never thought could be annoying when coming from a child, but everything he does just makes me annoyed for some reason. But Harry is doing his best not do anything that could cause those three to notice him, and I, of course being the loving brother I am pat his head and make it even more messy to get him to calm down and enjoy what he''s seeing. Of course we saw multiple other animals, like the badger, the eagle, and a snake. One thing I didn''t very enjoy was seeing that he was able to talk to the snake but that was remedied by how pure Harry''s complete awe was, not a single bit was covered in the arrogance and cunningness of a Slytherin or the evil of Voldemort which is where he gains this ability from. Then Dudley punches Harry out of the way and I caught Harry stopping him from hitting the hard and cold ground of the reptile house, of course then Harry is filled with anger and instinctively uses pure magic to make the window disappear. Dudley immediately falls in and the snake quickly escapes by slithering around which scared everyone in the reptile house away.
A few months later The same punishment that was given to Harry in the book and in the movie is instead given to the both of us. The summer was quite hot since the both of us where in the cupboard, but luckily we were let out early summer, of course we did leave a few times when I put some silence charms in their rooms so they wouldn''t even be able to hear an explosion right outside their door, and we, or I, took some food and some cold drinks that we could just throw away the rest of after finishing up. The nights were always the best time to be out since those three were always asleep. But when we were able to leave, Dudley''s gang came around and we went into "hiding". We just relaxed in a hidden room I made with my bare hands, with only a bit of magic to keep the place clean, well more like a hidden basement. I had also made another refidgerator, as I was saying a long time ago, the amount talents given to me are overpowered. I''m very sure that Harry knows that I can do very strange things and even normal things with extreme efficiency and even do them pretty good, an example would be the food I make and the glorious basement I made with my bare hands and a bit of magic. ... ... *CLINK* Oh, it''s finally here, the letter, or more to be exact, our letters. Uncle Ver-min: "Harry, get the letter" Kent: "No Harry, I''ll get it." I''m just gonna keep my letter and then give Harry''s letter, then give the normal letter to Uncle Ver-min, it should at least build up the letters in the chimney and the explode them out and force them onto that little island. Well it should be an island but I don''t know if the movie stayed true to the book. As I grab my letter, which I know since it has my name on it, I send it into my pocket dimension, and then pick up the other letters normally. As I''m walking back into the supperroom, I start laughing, but not like the maniacle way but more like the celebration kind. Kent: "Harry, you got a letter!" Aunt Petun-bitch, Uncle Ver-min, Dudley, and Harry: "WHAT!? Harry: "What? Who would write to me?" Uncle Ver-min: "Who would!?" He yells as he runs at me grabbing for the letter. Dudley: "Let me see it!" Aunt Petun-bitch: "*Gasp*" I dodge Uncle Ver-min''s desperate yet hilarious attempts to snatch the letter from my hands. When I reached Harry, I gave him the letter straight away, which he started to open immediately. Uncle yelled at me and then at Harry to not open the letter, of course his yelling made Harry hesitate and that gave time for Ver-min to snatch the letter away from Harry. Harry: "Wait! Give my letter back!" Uncle Ver-min: "NO! The both of you shall get back inside that cupboard or so help me!" He was obviously angry, well the both of them were, but I just grab Harry''s arm and bring him back with me to the cupboard, and so I start my process of calming Harry down since he''s very mad at Ver-min for taking his letter and not allowing him to read it, kind of childish but whatever, it''s nothing a loving brother can''t solve. But, as we reach the cupboard we hear Ver-min telling Dudely to get out as well. Uncle Ver-min: "Dudley, you should go as well." Dudley: "WHAT!? NO, just let me see the letter as well!" Uncle Ver-min: "Dudley, out, now!" We see Dudley sullenly walking out the room with his head hanging and hands balled up, well with how fat his fingers are, it looks more like a small loaf of bread. The thought of Dudley with small loaves for hands make me chuckle a bit. Dudley: "This is all your fault! Kent: "Oh is it?" Dudley: "Uaah!" Dudley''s weak attempt to land a hit on me is foddered by me sidestepping and him missing completely. After almost completely losing his balance as well, he regains his balance and then proceeds to throw a picture of himself with a smug smile looking at the camera. Oh the irony, throwing away his happiness away in a sense, but that has nothing to do with the current situation. Of course I''m not gonna fight back since that would give a reason for him to get me and possibly even Harry in trouble. But I realise I don''t have to fight back even a little bit as Dudley runs away and up the stairs. When I turn back around to go back to the cupboard, I see him looking past me in shock. Of course I turn only to see a piece of cloth stuck to the wall, it seems to be a velvet red or dark red color and I realise where it''s from, fucking Dudley''s jacket. Ah shit, well I can just repair that but Harry''s pure magic might be getting stronger, he was literally able to rip a piece of Dudley''s shirt off with neither of us noticing except Harry. It''s one thing to make a window disappear, while ripping a piece of someone''s jacket off or any kind of clothing is a different thing, and he doesn''t even have a wand nor has he learned any incantations or charms, just emotion. I wave Harry to get inside the cupboard which he obey''s, he''s such a good brother, and then I proceed to repair the jacket by editing my soul again. then . Although this is from a completely different media that is about 8,550 miles away, it should work since he ''edited''. Oh what the hell are you doing, this is the most absurd way of repairing things, you just got an ability from a completely reality that has nothing to do with Harry Potter or even Europe itself just to repair the jacket of someone that annoys you in every single way! Be quiet, this will andis going to work, if not, I will force you to make it work in the way you made everything. WAIT! Why are you using the word ''hell''! Why would you use a word that religions literally hated because it would disrespectyou? Shut up, just like you found out, I''m nothing like the gods that religions depicted, anyways I''m just using english because you understand it the most. Can you use other languages? Totally, I''ll use Hjubnum. Vfamju kokulum. What the actual fuck does that even mean!? Well, it''s a curse word, and if I were to translate it into english, it would be 2,431,708 words, or curse words. You dick. You just used the most terrible two worded curses that I''ve ever heard anyone say, and it''s even worse because it''s not even english, and you know that if you use curse words in a different language that it''s instantly amplified. Why does that make sense... I don''t know either. ... So my stan just appears right next to me and then touches the piece of clothing which causes the rag to quickly float up the stairs. Well that''s one problem solved by something completely off this reality, I wonder what else I''ll do for seemingly small problems. *BAM* Uncle Ver-min: "The both of you will be in Dudley''s second room from now on." Harry: "What!?" Harry was genuinely suprised and was happy but also at the same time, suspicious of Uncle Ver-min. Kent: "Does this have something to do with the letter?" I of course knew it was because of the letter since I know the future, partially... Uncle Ver-min just glares at me and doesn''t answer my question. A smile creeps up on my face which causes his face to turn a even darker shade of pink, seems like I''m angering him *Internal laughter*. ... ... Multiple small fights, or struggles, to get Harry''s letter happened, and I already had one. I was waiting for Harry to notice the hogwarts letter I grabbed and put in his bed, since I got a bit bored of seeing Harry, Dudley, and even Uncle Ver-min wrestling after a while. Good thing this will be over soon enough or I would have already died. ... ARRGH! Damnit, Harry is thinking so much and thinking of plans to get the letter that he hasn''t noticed the letter I put under his pillow, but if I were to give him the letter, he would know that I had it for some time and that I was deliberately not giving it to him. Then he would be mad at me and I can''t think of anything worse than that other than him ignoring me or even insulting me the rest of our lives! Good thing today is the day the letter explode out from the chimney, so I made sure that I was out in the hall so when Harry is thrown out into the hallway I can catch him safely. I may have also multiplied some of the letters so instead of there being thirty - forty letters, there are 60 something letters. There''s going to be a big explosion. You might be wondering why I can do magic like multiplying the letters without being called out by the ministry but that''s because what I''m using isn''t magic, just reality bending powers. Also with my reality bending powers I made the letters explode much earl- *FWOOPFWOOPFWOOP* There they are! Harry is doing his usual struggle of trying to grab the letters as Uncle Ver-min grabs him and throws him out into the letter which I casually catch him in. Before Harry can register what''s happening as he can see that letters are still flying down the chimney, I stuff a letter down his pocket. I just hope that he notices it. ... ... "Ay my boy Hagrid''s back" my thoughts were when I heard and sensed him outside the shack of a house we were in. Looks like the all time favorite "You''re a wizard Harry." line is going to be recided by Hagridin person.