《[WIP] ORBs》


 I. The Stream

    Apotheosis was trying his luck with stealth. He¡¯d always been intrigued by games that let you pick and choose abilities from a huge list, with no regard to what would actually be a viable build. Of course, more often than not, he¡¯d end up back at the drawing board, visiting the expensive re-roll NPC and adopting some top-tier build he¡¯d read about online. The latest ORBs rebalance, revision 7.0, was supposed to fix that age-old problem of having to min-max to achieve satisfying results in various situations. Time to see if it actually worked.


    First he reflexively looked to check his streaming stats on Twitch.


    Just to the left of his character¡¯s name was the viewer count for this stream: 1. He knew it was Ella, supporting him as usual, as she went about the daily grind of crafting with her insanely leveled character Sintari. She¡¯d been playing ORBs much longer than he had.


    Focus, he thought. At least get some good gameplay video.


    The Chtonik Keep loomed over him, an oily shadow just barely gleaming among its brethren in the dark of night. It might have been resplendent in the light, but the beauty of its walls and terraces, towers and spires was wasted in the darkness.


    He¡¯d planned for weeks to make this incursion into the Keep, and had been gathering Orbs to power his armor and spear for the attempt. Somewhere in there was an Epic Spear named Orthrus, after the monster that guarded it. The game¡¯s wiki said the spear had five enchantment sockets, five power sockets (where Orbs would be inserted to make the thing functional) and a passive boost to Piercing Damage, +10%. It was an unusually hard boss to fight in a relatively low level area, and the world of ORBs was huge, drawing high level players off to distant places, so there were only a scarce number of Orthruses floating around the markets, all of them selling for a hefty price.


    Going into it, Ape - everyone said his character¡¯s name was too long, so he just let them call him ¡®Ape¡¯, even though Apotheosis sounded really cool when you said it right - knew he couldn¡¯t take the fierce, two-headed demon dog Orthrus in a toe-to-toe fight at his current combat level of 50. But he also knew no streamer had ever attempted to steal the Epic Spear using Invisibility. If he pulled this off, he¡¯d be an instant headline.


    Whew, he breathed, wiping sweat off his brow before it seeped behind his VR display. I should invest in a headband. Alright, let¡¯s do this.


    In the region of Chtonia, it was always night-time, and a single gigantic spotlight pretended at the role of a moon, hanging far above from the deep cavern¡¯s ceiling. Ape edged toward the Chtonik Keep in a Stealth stance, crouched low and moving almost silently. He¡¯d had to remove his usual Plate Boots and wear some Enchanted Leather Moccasins instead. They were brown and hideous, not helped at all by the incongruous presence of Ley Wires lit up with the green energy of a Grasslands Orb to offer him Speed and Vitality. Ugly, but expensive, for Ape anyway.


    There were no guards outside the Keep, and its moat was dry. The area¡¯s habitual neglect from other players meant the wiki info on this place was a little lacking, but Ape had figured out that he could sneak into the lower levels by way of the dry moat bed, skipping the labyrinth of halls above. There was an open grate, barely concealed, that would give him access to an empty cellar. He¡¯d have to wing it from there.


    Ape dropped down into the moat and followed it around a corner to where the grate should be.


    Right there, as promised, he thought.


    Looking left, right, not believing it could be this easy, Ape slipped into the unsecured cellar. His avatar¡¯s feet splashed in the puddles left by the draining of the moat, and his feedback gear tried to approximate wetness by getting colder around his actual feet. It was almost as uncomfortable as the real thing.


    He crept toward the cellar door, still Stealthy, avoiding bones, pebbles and other detritus on the stone floor. Ape rested one hand on the slimy blocks of the wall, and gently pushed open the door. A mob had just walked by, a low level Skeleton Patroller with a measly combat level of 5. Its level and Health Points hovered over its iron-helmed skull, semi-transparent. He snuck out of the cellar to follow it and thrust his Silver Spear into it without hesitation.


    Critical! 4983, the luminous orange damage numbers read.


    The Skeleton Patroller rasped in an ethereal voice and threw its head back in anguish, bones crumpling to the damp floor in a pile, leaving its armor and sword behind. An obsessive part of him wanted to collect the loot, but it was so common as to be nearly worthless.


    Focus on the mission.


    Ape¡¯s Silver Spear wasn¡¯t too special, but he¡¯d brought this rather than something more rare due to its increased effectiveness against Undead. The night kingdom of Chtonia was predictably crawling with such things, and he was pretty sure he wouldn¡¯t need a fancier weapon this day. The spear¡¯s single Power Orb was a perfect silver sphere Sintari had refined for him, and he tapped it habitually to check its charge - 9,990/10,000. Naturally. He¡¯d barely even used it.


    As the Skeleton¡¯s remains faded away, a chime sounded and electric blue text appeared in the air above: Stealth XP + 30. Stealth up! Level 5. Ape tried not to look at the level number too long; he probably should have trained it up more before coming here¡­The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.


    But shoe-stringing this was kind of the point.


    Ape slew a few more Skeleton Patrollers for miniscule XP gain, and none of them had seen him Sneaking up. He rounded the next few corners and came upon a long, winding stair with dewy walls and torches burning with green flame. The sheen of a one-way barrier was just visible in the dim light. Once he entered, he¡¯d have to nab the Spear of Orthrus without being detected, and use his Recall Gem to teleport back to the nearest village. If the Orthrus boss caught him, well, his chances at winning were nil.


    Taking another deep breath, wiping his brow again, Apotheosis strode through the barrier and into the stairwell.


    Orthrus was asleep on a central dais in the cold, cavernous room below, curled up with its heads on its paws just like a real dog. Ape appreciated that the simulated fur rustled gently in the faint current of air blowing in from the stairwell. Orthrus snarled groggily as it dreamed, most likely of all the noobs it had and would ever consume, their virtual guts heavy in its large belly. High alcoves ran all along the circular wall, but none offered a place to hide. On the far side of the room stood a single statue, headless and one-armed, holding the Spear in its remaining hand. The Epic weapon gleamed in Ape¡¯s sight like a precious thing.


    Ape glanced at the Invis spell on the right of his Hud, and the eye tracker in his headset registered the command. His avatar became transparent, showing only a slight distortion of the air so he could see his own limbs and weapon.


    He snuck around to the right, hugging the wall, moving painfully slow. No sense rushing this. Orthrus showed no signs of detection.


    Keeping his cool was excruciating, the seconds dragging on as if he were experiencing a moment of shock or emergency. Finally he reached the statue that held the Spear, and he reached for it, heart racing.


    The chest-piece of his feedback gear vibrated violently as it registered an attack, and for a moment Ape was certain he¡¯d awoken the Orthrus. Then he saw his health drop to 10% as a huge Dragonslayer arrow pierced him through, its head sticking so far out of his body he could have craned his neck to lick it.


    That was a weird thought.


    Before he could turn toward the stairwell or claim the loot, a second arrow impaled him, his avatar¡¯s blood running freely down his apparently useless armor. He fell to the floor, feedback gear shaking his knees, then his side. Ape was in Bleed-out mode, with no one to Resuscitate him. How had anyone seen him? Must have been a Detection spell. Now his Invis was nullified by entering combat. He sighed, heart still pounding, and looked dejectedly toward the stairs.


    A bow-wielding Exfiltrator in ridiculously loud Diamond Plate Armor stood there, taking careful aim at Orthrus. He had knocked two of the long, thick arrows, and released them with a thwoop!


    Critical! 150,207


    Critical! 150,323


    Those were insane hits.


    The two-headed dog awoke just long enough to release a mournful howl, each of its skulls sprouting an arrow and streaming dark blood, and then it fell in a heap, one rear paw twitching as its life ended.


    ¡°You one-shot it?¡± Ape asked incredulously. His avatar¡¯s voice synthesizer garbled his voice, reflecting the pain of his injuries.


    The Exfiltrator flipped up his heavily stylized faceplate and grinned. Ape flicked his eyes upward and his killer¡¯s name was revealed - Deuces. It figured¡­


    Deuces stepped up to the corpse of Orthrus and skinned it. The pelt would be worth a small fortune to Ape, probably pocket change to this guy.


    ¡°How¡¯d you even know it had respawned?¡± Deuces asked, coming nearer.


    ¡°It, what? It¡¯s on a timer?¡± Ape asked stupidly.


    Deuces laughed. ¡°Noob.¡±


    ¡°I¡¯m not a noob,¡± Ape protested. ¡°I¡¯ve been playing for a year.¡± He was furious, but trying not to show it.


    Deuces laughed again, put a fist proudly to his chest and said, ¡°Alpha!¡±


    Seventeen stinking years? Ape balked. Even Sintari had only been playing for eight or so. Ape had always thought people would grow out of the game at some point.


    Deuces loomed over Apotheosis, looked down and said, ¡°Cool name bro,¡± and reached up to take the Orthrus Spear. It was glorious, shaft made of alternating gold and silver segments, with an ornate relief of Orthrus¡¯s two heads, their tongues lolling out of their mouths and melding together to form the foot-long head of the spear. Ape stared longingly as Deuces collapsed the spear into its sheathed form, just a single segment long so it could be stored on his belt.


    Deuces knelt next to him and Ape groaned, ¡°Nah man, come on¡­ You got the spear already.¡±


    Full loot drop in competitive online games had been outlawed as gambling and bullying several years before, but Foxhole, the developers of ORBs, were still allowed to include a partial drop. A player¡¯s killer could take his prey¡¯s Orbs right out of their slots, and from his inventory, but none of his weapons, armor, or other items. This essentially left a victim classless until he could be Resuscitated or respawn, and get new Orbs to power his gear. He¡¯d be able to defend himself to some degree, since all armor still had base stats, but any meaningful play would be effectively suspended until more Orbs had been slotted.


    ¡°Welcome to ORBs, bud,¡± Deuces said as he casually plucked the Orbs from each and every one of Ape¡¯s power and enchantment slots. The armor emptied, Deuces inspected the Silver Spear and whistled as he extracted its shining Orb.


    ¡°Nice work man, you do this?¡± he asked. Ape shook his head.


    ¡°It¡¯s a Sintari,¡± Ape said. ¡°Check the info.¡±


    ¡°Ah, too bad, I woulda brought you into the guild,¡± Deuces winked. He drew a shortsword from his side and let its blade extend. It was a nice piece, with the blacksmith stamp of NotHatori just above the hilt.


    Ape groaned again. Would the humiliation never cease?


    This was the other concession made to hardcore PVPers in the game. Besides being able to take all of their prey¡¯s Orbs, one¡¯s murderer also had the option to mutilate their opponent in the goriest ways possible. This had to have been Ape¡¯s worst stream ever.


    As Deuces began to methodically, joylessly, dismember Ape from fingers to toes, Sintari pinged Ape with a /whisper.


    ¡°That really sucks, man.¡±

 II. Sintari

    Walking home without any speed enhancement was excruciatingly slow.  Since any skill or magic not needed for basic survival was tied to a player¡¯s gear, most of Ape¡¯s abilities were currently greyed out, unavailable.  Without any Orbs on hand to replace what he¡¯d lost, he couldn¡¯t even summon his mount to make the trek back home. He¡¯d respawned in a small village not far from the Keep, and though he only needed to travel for a half an hour or so to reach the Gates of Chtonia, the walk was one of shame.


    His avatar¡¯s segmented armor looked like an insect drained of all color, or a mech suit painted only in primer.  He¡¯d get his custom colors and textures back when he reslotted Orbs into each piece. Ape tried to chin up. He had plenty of Orbs with which to recover, that wasn¡¯t the problem.  He¡¯d just had high hopes for this excursion, and to come so close, and then fail because of someone else, it was just depressing.


    Daydreaming of failure caused him to wander off the dark dirt road slightly, and he accidentally aggroed a Chirachnid that was in the process of laying eggs in its nest.  The thing charged, eight legs skittering on rocky ground, lion¡¯s face roaring. The monster looked worse than it really was - just another C5 mob like the Skeleton Patrollers.  Ape drew his Silver Spear and let it extend with a chink chink chink chink, swiped at the Chirachnid with its blade, and reduced the nasty thing to loot.


    Critical!  723, the luminous orange numbers read.


    ¡°Huh,¡± he breathed out loud, watching a small Orb the color of green apple candy roll away from the spider¡¯s corpse.  He hadn¡¯t seen a any peridot in almost a year, much less a Polished Peridot, already refined. It wasn¡¯t that peridot was rare - he¡¯d simply grown out of such low-level Orbs months before.  He picked it up. The spherical surface was rough compared to Sintari¡¯s work.


    Ape tapped the Orb - 261/450 units.  That much peridot wouldn¡¯t be enough to summon his mount, but better to have one Orb than none, so he slotted it into his Enchanted Leather Moccasins.  The footwear turned brown again, and its network of Ley Wires lit up with the green of the Peridot. Now he could move a little faster.


    When he reached Annum, the old city built around the Gates of Chtonia, it was as empty as ever - two noobs running a quest line, Smart NPCs peddling their wares at the various shops and hollering at the few passersby.


    Ape made his way into the heart of the city where the big Gate stood, tapped the stone blocks of its high arch, and selected his teleport destination, then stepped through as the Gate powered up.


    He emerged from null space into Xelt, a large city built on the side of a mountain in the region of Eolis.  Cities like this were safe zones, and Ape sighed in relief as he let his guard down. Eolis was a vibrant land, basking in eternal late Spring.  It was nice to be among green, growing things, and back out in the sunlight, which radiated its warmth through his feedback gear.


    Ape strolled down cobblestone paths toward the east end of town.  Most of Xelt¡¯s buildings were made of large limestone blocks, with wood-framed roofs and shingles of bluish clay.  A lot of the city¡¯s real estate was dedicated to player housing and shops, and one could spot these easily by the shining Ley Wires embedded into the seams between stone blocks.  Xelt¡¯s economy was healthy, and almost all of the Player Owned Structures were lit up and occupied.


    Sintari had her POS in the foundries district.  He hadn¡¯t told her he was coming to visit, but he knew she¡¯d be hard at work still, and wouldn¡¯t mind if he popped in.


    Ape admired the advanced particle simulation as the countless foundries of Xelt belched out black smoke that stained the entire district with soot.  Players with NasalJet gear would smell the acrid stench, which didn¡¯t sound too great to Ape, but he couldn¡¯t afford that kind of gear anyway.


    The Wires of Sintari¡¯s home shone more vibrantly than any other in the neighborhood, though the architecture of the place was Xelt standard; she hadn¡¯t customized it.  The enhanced brightness had to do with the massive bonuses in capacity and output her Orbs received from her status as a Master Refiner and Sculptor.


    Ape knocked on her front door and waited patiently.  Even for a friend, she wouldn¡¯t put down whatever she was working on until she came to a stopping point.


    Sintari was actually on the Foxhole payroll, in a way.  Though NPCs had evolved greatly since the old days, integrating the latest in chatbot tech and constantly improving AI, having human players willing to dedicate their days to providing content for other players was invaluable.  Sintari was talented enough that this had become a full time job for her.


    Ape reclined on the steps leading up to Sintari¡¯s door while he waited, and she finally answered after several minutes.


    ¡°Hey CJ,¡± she said, using his irl initials.  ¡°Come on in.¡±


    The front room, and in fact most of Sintari¡¯s place, was dedicated to her craft.  For someone so meticulous about her work, she seemed pretty sloppy, with stacks of materials, sketches, and blueprints littering every nook and cranny, arranged in no discernable order.  Somewhere in the back of the house was a bed she actually slept in when running refining jobs, so she could hear the job completion notifications and not have to set timers irl. The bed was the only surface not covered with the trappings of her trade.


    ¡°You in a hurry?¡± she asked.  He shook his head no. ¡°Cool, let me finish up then, you can hang around.¡±


    Ape watched as Sintari went back to work.  She had one of the coolest avatars he¡¯d ever seen.   Naturally the female mesh was beautiful, modelled to imitate a tall Scandinavian woman with a lithe form.  She¡¯d dyed the hair red and had it pulled back in four rows of braids. It was both amusing and strangely attractive that the avatar¡¯s form was largely hidden by leather straps and pouches and belts, laden with tools and Orbs.  She looked every bit the Master Sculptor.


    Sintari drew her Zbrush from its sheath and cycled through its optional tips to the one she wanted.  The brush would allow her to alter an object¡¯s mesh to change its appearance. In the case of Orbs, a complicated Artistic AI would determine dynamically if the end result was a net improvement in aesthetic quality, and adjust the Orb¡¯s stats accordingly.  On her work table was a small Levitation Stand with the Orb she was currently sculpting suspended in the air above it. The small mass of Rhodium¡­ Wait, Rhodium! He¡¯d never even seen it outside auction posts. His friend was finishing the finer details of a murderous-looking lion, roaring at some unseen threat.Love this novel? Read it on Royal Road to ensure the author gets credit.


    ¡°That¡¯s a job right?  You didn¡¯t just buy some Rhodium,¡± Ape asked.


    Sintari nodded absently.  She made most of her money Sculpting custom luxury decor for top-tier players who had little else to spend their gold on.  Altering an Orb¡¯s mesh was also a great way to store its value safely. Once the Orb¡¯s shape was made inconsistent with the standard spherical slots on all weapons and armor, it was no longer considered functional and couldn¡¯t be used to power or enchant gear, but it also couldn¡¯t be looted from a dead player.  Only through trade and craft could it be restored to a functional shape.


    At length Sintari sheathed her Zbrush and stepped back to consider her work.  The lighting in the small workroom shifted through several colors, intensities and points of origin as she invisibly adjusted settings to inspect the lion in different conditions.  Apparently satisfied, she brushed her hands off, needlessly, for there was no real dust here, and favored Ape with a smile.


    ¡°Hey,¡± she said, holding out a fist for him to bump.  ¡°Sucks about earlier. You almost had it.¡±


    Man her mocap gear must be premium, Ape thought.  Sintari¡¯s smile looked just as amazing as Ella¡¯s.


    ¡°Ape?¡±


    ¡°Yeah,¡± he said belatedly.  ¡°I guess it feels good my plan would have worked.  I¡¯ll have to take backup if I try it again.¡±


    ¡°Not me,¡± she laughed, holding her hands up defensively.  Her character had absolutely no combat skill. She was here purely for the industry.  She happened to glance down and caught her breath.


    ¡°Hey nice,¡± she said, bending to touch Ape¡¯s moccasins.


    ¡°Nice?¡± he chuckled.


    ¡°Huh?  Oh no they¡¯re hideous.  Yeah. No, it¡¯s the peridot.  Can I see?¡±


    He removed the footwear and handed them over, thankful for the simplicity of modern trade interfaces.


    She removed the Peridot Orb without asking and turned it over in her hands.  It had a hairline fracture on one side.


    ¡°That¡¯s why it maxes out at, what, 60%?¡± she said thoughtfully.  Good guess.


    ¡°Spider thing dropped it at 58%,¡± Ape said, impressed at her appraisal.


    ¡°It¡¯s perfect,¡± she said.  ¡°Can I have it?¡±


    ¡°Sure,¡± he said.  The number of precious and useful Orbs and items she¡¯d given him for free was beyond count at this point.  She could have all the peridot she wanted. ¡°What¡¯s it perfect for?¡±


    ¡°Lion¡¯s eyes,¡± she said, returning the moccasins and turning back to her worktable.  ¡°Client wanted something arresting and kind of creepy for the eye color, left it up to me.¡±  She started thinking out loud. ¡°I can patch up the fracture with Mist Essence and it¡¯ll look all smoky.¡±


    Sintari sliced the Peridot Orb in half with her Zbrush, bisecting the fracture so both halves would bear the imperfection.  She took a few pinches of Mist Essence from one of her many leather pouches and pressed it into the fractures, wiping away the excess with a thumb.  Then she scaled the halves down to the right size and fixed them in the lion¡¯s eye sockets. Immediately they lit up in a ghostly green and began to emit pale smoke.


    Sintari grinned with pleasure, stood back and studied the lion further, with a hand on one hip.


    ¡°What do you think?¡± she asked.  ¡°Is it done?¡±


    She¡¯d never asked his opinion of her art before.


    ¡°I mean, yeah.  It looks basically perfect,¡± Ape said.  He knew he didn¡¯t have her eye for beauty though - at least, not the artistic kind.


    ¡°Alright then,¡± she nodded once, and tapped the lion to finalize her edits.


    Immediately the earth beneath them shuddered.  There was a faint sensation of movement, barely perceptible.


    Ape and Sintari looked at each other in surprise.  There hadn¡¯t been anything in last quarter¡¯s patch notes about earthquakes, though it was a cool idea.


    ¡°What was that?¡± Ape asked.  Sintari shook her head. ¡°Let¡¯s look outside.¡±


    They weren¡¯t the only ones to check out their surroundings.  Everyone was peeking out at the streets and the sky. Nothing seemed amiss except that tiniest feeling of drift.  They stepped back into Sintari¡¯s house.


    A quest box had appeared over the lion sculpture.  It had an icon like the shadow of a treasure chest, with a gilded question mark in its center.  The text read:


    Congratulations!  You¡¯re the first to achieve the Secret Combination of Orbs!  We weren¡¯t sure if anyone ever would!


    Reward:


    ¡°They who seek will find their greatest challenge in the halls beneath a statue with a heart of gold.  Those who overcome shall be masters of the fate of all lands.¡±


    Rhodium Orb x 20


    Perfect Peridot Orb x 100


    Orb of Mist Essence x 500


    Golden Heart x 2


    Ape¡¯s jaw had dropped, and his low-budget, infrared scanner-based mocap gear translated the expression to his avatar.  Sintari laughed.


    ¡°We¡¯re rich!¡± she cried, slapping him on the back.


    ¡°You¡¯re already rich,¡± he said.  ¡°And we? You¡¯re the one who made the thing.¡±


    ¡°But you gave me the peridot; I never would have thought of it.  Besides, you¡¯re in my house, so we¡¯re considered a party. Check your inventory.¡±


    He did, and sure enough, half the loot was there.  He wondered about the Golden Hearts. They were purely decorative, and hadn¡¯t been part of the secret ingredients.  Included in their info was a recap of the quest reward log.


    ¡°Jeez it¡¯s good we¡¯re in a safe zone.  I can barely imagine losing this many orbs¡­¡± Ape said.


    ¡°Lost more once,¡± Sintari winked.  She moved to dismiss the quest box and retrieve the lion.  ¡°Probably why I don¡¯t leave the city much anymore, let Red Dog Guild do the hauling for me.¡±


    ¡°That quoted text though,¡± Ape mused.  ¡°It¡¯s listed as a reward. You think that means something?¡±


    ¡°Oh yeah, obviously,¡± Sintari said.  She rarely missed a beat. ¡°Sounds like we need to run around smashing some statues.  We¡¯ve opened up some kind of quest line. Never heard of anything like it though. Probably combat, so we¡¯re gonna need some help.¡±


    ¡°Well,¡± said Ape, ¡°lucky no one else knows about this, or else¡­¡±


    Sintari stiffened, looked up at him and clasped his arm firmly.


    ¡°Are you still streaming?¡± she rasped.


    Ape¡¯s heart sunk.  He glanced up at the cluster of status icons around his name and health.  The red dot for streaming was pulsing slowly, and his viewer count read, ¡®2¡¯.


    A /whisper faded into his hud from a familiar name.


    Thanks again bro, it read, with a little peace sign emoji.  It was from Deuces.

 III. Smashing Statues

    ¡°Hey don¡¯t feel bad,¡± Sintari said, giving him a look of pity. ¡°By the time we¡¯d gone around and smashed a couple hundred props, other people would have started noticing anyway. Besides, the quest might be locked to us; maybe no one else can complete it.¡±


    ¡°Yeah, but at least they wouldn¡¯t have had the clue,¡± Ape said. ¡°They wouldn¡¯t have known what to look for.¡± Sintari grimaced but didn¡¯t argue.


    Apotheosis had ended his stream and taken a seat to sulk on Sintari¡¯s couch, amidst the clutter. She sat down next to him, scooping materials and tools onto the floor carelessly. She seemed to be thinking of what to say as she leaned forward, elbows resting on her thighs. Ape¡¯s feedback gear translated her nearness into warmth, and he fought to keep calm. Now he wished he had NasalJet - the scent of her would be amazing.


    ¡°Whatever happens,¡± she said, ¡°we¡¯ve gotta get out there and smashing either way. Can¡¯t just leave it to them right?¡±


    She was right.


    ¡°Okay then. Let me reslot,¡± Ape said, digging in for some optimism.


    Sintari disappeared into a back room of the house while Ape accessed his global inventory. Only Orbs could be stored there, and one could access the storage from within any large city. This was considered a necessary privilege, since the Charge contained in Orbs was also the game¡¯s currency.


    He went about slotting Steel Orbs into his armor, and felt the familiar ease of movement return to his limbs. His arms and legs felt taxed from the artificial resistance created by his feedback gear.


    Ape looked toward the back of the house and the sounds of Sintari rummaging through various piles of things. After several spurts of searching she emerged with a gleaming warhammer. The four-foot haft of Electrum was topped with a Diamond head she¡¯d sculpted into the shape of leaping dolphins, the space between them filled with a relief of ocean waves. Ape smiled.


    ¡°Shut up,¡± she said, herself grinning at the gaudy weapon. ¡°I was like, eleven years old when I made it. Anyway, check the info, it¡¯s pretty sick.¡±


    A Bloody Porpoise - Legendary Warhammer


    Damage Boost: 100%  Rate: 1 Dmg: 8860


    DPS: 6202 Weight: 36 kg Special: Knockback


    ¡°Is that your Accuracy killing the DPS?¡± he asked. She nodded. ¡°You¡¯ve never swung the thing even once¡­?¡± She nodded again. Ape laughed. ¡°Still¡­ pretty sick. I couldn¡¯t swing it that fast. I never knew your Strength was so high.¡±


    ¡°Train it everyday to increase Carry Weight,¡± she explained. That, along with her high Dexterity, was the only reason she could get so much raw damage out of the hammer with practically no weapon skill. ¡°So you sticking with that Silver Spear, or you gonna grab your artifact one?¡±


    ¡°I¡¯ll probably grab the artifact, just in case we come across anything really nasty out there. It¡¯s an Orb hog, but I think we¡¯ve got some Charge to spare huh?¡±


    ¡°Yeah this might be fun, I can finally gain some combat skill,¡± Sintari beamed. She glanced at her various worktables littered with projects in progress. ¡°Have to come back and finish a few things later though.¡±


    ¡°You gonna armor up?¡± Ape asked. Sintari was still dressed in her crafter¡¯s gear.


    ¡°Nah,¡± she said. ¡°This stuff gives me some pretty good escape skills. Plus it¡¯s about on par with leather anyway, and it¡¯s more comfortable.¡± He¡¯d forgotten Sintari played in TextureGear. Was any of her gear not premium?


    The pair left Sintari¡¯s house and trekked across the city to Ape¡¯s place. His apartment was smaller, its Orbs glowed less brightly, but it was immaculately clean. His prized spear stood on its stand by the fireplace.


    Amalgamated Khopesh - Artifact Spear


    Damage Boost: 20% Rate: .8 Dmg: 6,000


    DPS: 7,500 Weight: 3 kg Special: Halves Rate when collapsed, Dmg reduced to 50%. +5% chance to interrupt.


    The dark wood haft was wrapped in purple and orange-dyed spirals of leather, and its head was actually a short sickle-sword of weathered bronze. Ape retrieved it and left his Silver Spear in its place. He slotted it with a Silver Orb for another few percent damage boost. He also changed back into his plate boots.


    Outside, they summoned their mounts, Ape¡¯s an oversized husky with spiked collars and anklets, Sintari¡¯s a squat gorilla she rode as if she were its backpack. The husky was the faster of the two, but the great ape could climb walls.


    They began their quest by taking various portals to all the areas they could think of that held notable or monumental statues. None of these turned out to be destructible, and offered no indication as to the makeup of their secret hearts. So far, no one else was out hunting


    ¡°Alright, where should we go next?¡± Sintari asked.


    ¡°Might as well start close to home,¡± Ape said. ¡°We can hit some of the goblin fortresses near Xelt. It¡¯ll be safer for you anyway to level your weapon skill in a green zone.¡±


    They made their back to Xelt and out of the city, since property there wasn¡¯t destructible, and headed toward one of the many goblin keeps in the hills beyond. Fortresses, mansions, and castles seemed most likely to contain statues worthy of their destructive consideration, so it was agreed they would focus on such locations. They both knew it would be like searching for a needle in a haystack, but there was no other option given their only clue.


    Ape knew it was silly, but roaring into Bargond¡¯s Keep to decimate an army of C10 goblins made him feel a little more on top of things again. Laughter was always the best medicine for the blues, and watching Sintari use her gaudy warhammer to send frantic mobs flying down hallways like ragdolls was hilarious.


    They also smashed every statue they came across.


    Voxel-based environments had long since become standard fare, and they had evolved light years beyond the cubes of the past. This meant it was now expected that the battlefield would be malleable, subject to a player¡¯s whims. Trenches and moats could be dug in PVP wars, cover could be erected and destroyed. Most people, however, never bothered smashing such things as lamps and statues.


    Leaving no stone unturned, Ape and Sintari rampaged their way to Bargond¡¯s throne room, and slew the fat old goblin in just a few hits. He roared at the sky, cursing unknown gods, and fell heavily to the stone floor, blood spreading in a pool beneath him.


    The wicked warlord Bargond the Elder has been slain, said the public quest¡¯s completion text. His many vassals will be forever indebted to you. The green hills of Gundheim are at peace once again!


    Ape wondered how many times the green hills of Gundheim had been freed from the goblin warlord. Certainly Bargond the Elder would soon return for another reign of terror.


    A gaggle of noobs had crowded by the invisible barrier to the throne room and were staring in shock.


    ¡°I can has some loot?¡± one shouted. The others laughed.


    ¡°It¡¯s garbage loot,¡± Sintari said to Ape. He nodded, and they tapped it and labeled it ¡®abandoned¡¯, so the noobs could divide it among themselves.If you stumble upon this tale on Amazon, it''s taken without the author''s consent. Report it.


    ¡°Merry Christmas,¡± Ape said.


    He and Sintari raided several other locations in similar fashion, clearing out the county of Gundheim and pressing on long after the grind became joyless. They did not come across the statue with a heart of gold.


    Finally she said, ¡°Hey my logout timer¡¯s coming up and I gotta finish up a few contracts Wanna head back?¡±


    Ape said yeah. ¡°I¡¯ve gotta eat, then I might as well start my timer early.¡±


    In a continued effort to protect hapless gamers from themselves, the world¡¯s governments had at last instituted a mandatory logout period of eight consecutive hours per day. This incidentally caused huge scheduling issues in space MMOs and survival games in particular, where, traditionally, POSes were vulnerable around the clock, but there was nothing for it. The more time people spent in VR, the greater the yearly death toll of people who couldn¡¯t stop themselves from playing long enough for self-care. Ape had always been in tune with his body¡¯s needs, so it was more of an inconvenience to him than a help, but he supposed it was worth it if it kept other people from getting hurt.


    The pair made their way back to Xelt, discussing plans for the next session.


    ¡°That was fun,¡± Ape said. ¡°I don¡¯t think we¡¯ve ever actually quested together before.¡±


    ¡°Yeah it was good,¡± Sintari smiled. ¡°You like, really toned irl? I¡¯m all sweaty from swinging my arms around.¡±


    Ape laughed. He was actually pretty swole, but he didn¡¯t say it.


    They parted ways at the city¡¯s gate, returning to their homes to recharge their Orbs and logout in safety, leaving their characters to read skill books for offline progression.


    They logged back in almost simultaneously, eight hours later, and text /whispered each other ¡®rdy¡¯. They met up by the Xelt¡¯s east gate and prepared to strike out further into the region of Eolis. There were still dozens of places to hunt in Eolis alone - in dark forests and bogs, in the mountains, and along rocky cliffs above the western sea. These were lands almost every player had quested through early in their career, except crafters like Sintari, so nearly all of it was familiar to Ape. He even remembered a few of the grander statues to be found in some of the region¡¯s castles.


    They were slogging through a bog infested with poisonous slimes when a player named Zaz PMed Ape.


    Dude, why aren¡¯t you streaming? Our guild keeps checking your channel but you¡¯re not there!! We wanna see what happens next¡­


    Ape told Sintari about the message and they mused over it.


    ¡°Think it¡¯s honest?¡± he asked. She wasn¡¯t sure. It could have just been a ploy to get him to reveal more about the mysterious quest. She herself had received dozens of messages offering contracts, commissions, and guild invites, and had ignored them.


    Ape checked on his Twitch channel for the first time since the previous day, and was astounded. Garbanzo Beings, Zaz''s guild, must have all followed him at once. His count was up by 80 people!


    "Nice!" Sintari congratulated him. "You gonna stream? Everyone''ll know where the statue isn''t..."


    "Thinking about it," he said.


    The clincher came when they reached the Slime Queen''s lair. A raid party of C15s was trashing the place, smashing not just the various ruined statues, but everything that wasn''t impermeable to damage. They seemed to be having a good time of it.


    "Cleared it out already," someone said in local chat. "But these guys didn''t listen to me either."


    "Looks like word got out," Sintari said. Ape sighed. "Might as well enjoy the new followers." She slapped him on the back. Right as usual.


    Moments after Ape started up the stream, his Twitch tab was bombarded with more comments than he could handle, and his viewer count was up to 92.


    Awesome!, Zaz wrote, We''ll keep in touch and let you know if we find anything. He shared a link to his own channel, and Ape opened it up in a sub-window on his hud to follow the guy. It appeared the Garbanzo Beings were farming statues on the border of Eolis and Suldia, the overcast, yet arid region that led to the massive caves of Chtonia.


    Hours of grinding passed, Sintari continuing to level her warhammer skill, and it seemed none of the Slime Royalty was in possession of the coveted statue. On the plus side, Ape was up to 108 followers.


    "You think Deuces let the word out?" Ape mused. "Or one of his guildies?"


    They were travelling along one of Eolis''s main roads, headed now for the Mountains of Greed, home of the greater goblins. Sintari had no answer, but she did have a suggestion.


    "Thinking we may need some help with all this competition about," she said. "Never was into guilds myself... But I do know a few guys who might join up. Or should we fold into a larger one? I doubt anyone would turn us down at this point."


    Ape had always enjoyed soloing the game, and joining a large group subject to someone else''s whims wasn''t too palatable. Now if he or Sintari were the guild master... that might be different. The prestige of completing the quest might be worth sharing the spoils.


    "Alright," he assented. "Message your guys."


    The first to answer the call was a player named TheRealSoul. They waited for him outside the high, crumbling tower of a goblin necromancer named Rothan the Sickly.


    TheRealSoul was a high-level Caster who''d been playing since Beta. His armored horse sauntered up the mountain path, Soul¡¯s flowing red robes trailing behind. He waved as he approached. Soul had the serene look of a wizened sorcerer, with a long white beard like a kung fu master. He carried a staff of gnarled wood that looked to have grown around a center core of Jadeite. A pair of Platinum prongs jutted up from the tip of the staff, and a red plasma danced between them. A floating orb of dwarvish make appeared to be Soul''s pet, and it followed at a distance, scanning the environment for threats.


    "Hey!" he greeted, surprisingly cheery compared to his avatar''s visage.


    "Thanks for coming," Ape said.


    "Man if there was ever a time to party up, it''s now," Soul laughed. "Freakin'' exploding voxels everywhere - people are going nuts."


    It was true. In just the last couple of hours, Ape had gained another hundred followers. Players were bombarding Foxhole''s Twitter account, demanding some disclosure about the secret quest. Why was its trigger so specific? Why wouldn''t it trigger for anyone else who combined Rhodium, Peridot, and Mist in the form of a lion, or any other shape for that matter? Foxhole had thus far not been forthcoming.


    ¡°So you think you got the lock on this quest?¡± Soul asked.


    ¡°Not at all,¡± Ape chuckled. ¡°We¡¯re just breaking everything we can.¡±


    ¡°Ha, well, let¡¯s do it then.¡±


    The three headed up toward Rothan¡¯s tower and confronted the two C20 Necromancer Apprentice mobs standing guard at its ruined entrance.


    Both necros raised their zombie minions to attack, and these were quickly dispatched by Soul¡¯s pet. The spherical golem was made of interlocking rings that rotated ceaselessly. It had a glass lens from which it fired blasts of red light.


    Critical! 10,870


    Critical! 11,033


    The zombies both burned into ash.


    Ape was duly impressed. Sintari, meanwhile, had closed the distance with the necros. They tried to fix her with twin beams of dark, life-siphoning energy, but she dodged and felled them both with a few AOE swipes of her hammer.


    Smash! 5024


    Smash! 4980


    Enjoy it now, Ape thought. It won¡¯t be so easy when we get to the nastier zones¡­


    Ape took the lead as they entered the tower. More necromantic minions fired withering bolts of black down upon them from above, but swiftly Soul¡¯s pet rose to dispatch them.


    The bulk of this location was underground, and there were lots of statues due to the dungeon¡¯s gothic styling. Ape led the way to a stair leading down into the mass of the mountain.


    A squad of C25 Dead Brutes greeted them at the entrance to the dungeon¡¯s first level, and Ape launched into his go-to combo, rolling in among the Brutes and spinning his spear around like a whirlwind. The AOE stunned each Brute long enough for him to distribute his follow-up seven strike sequence among them, slicing through skulls and bellies. A flurry of damage notifications exploded from the group and the Brutes died their second death.


    Soul was clapping. ¡°Nice, you make it look fun. Always gone caster myself.¡±


    The little party smashed dozens of identical statues of Rothan the Sickly (and he did look sickly) as they moved from floor to floor, but none offered any further secrets.


    They blitzed the rest of the dungeon handily and came to Rothan¡¯s laboratory, where he appeared to be working on some wicked Frankenstein monster. The C30 master necromancer screamed at the intrusion and immediately encased himself in defensive spells, raining particles and lighting up with various buffs and shields. Rothan was known to be particularly hard for a C30 boss, and showcased his hefty resistances as Sintari and Ape engaged him in melee. He fixed Ape with a life-siphon, black beam twisting with snakes of green and red, and Ape¡¯s HP began to fall slowly.


    Soul raised his Epic staff and his avatar bellowed in a strange language. From the fire between the Platinum prongs there came a beam of crimson light that cut Rothan clean in half, blasting him apart before the boss mob could even initiate his hit animation.


    Ultra! 94,985


    Rothan burned away into the aether, leaving behind a glowing pile of loot. Soul linked his staff in chat and grinned.


    Ether Attuned - Epic Staff


    Dmg Boost: 100% Rate: 1 Dmg: 18,997


    DPS: 18,997 Weight: 9


    Special: Ability - Death Beam - Consume the Orb in the staff¡¯s Ammo slot with a minimum Charge of 25,000. Target below your combat level takes 500% Dmg. If target is not killed, it gains Death Curse with a timer of 60s. Cooldown 1 hr.


    ¡°It was worth showing off,¡± Soul said. Now that they were out of combat, he took a moment to re-slot the staff.


    ¡°You¡¯re hired,¡± said Ape.