《Dive Deep》 Chapter One Chapter One I inspected the battlefield, the catchy victory music that announced the end of combat was fading, leaving the clearing silent, save for the occasional twitter of the small birds that hid in the trees and shrubs. I saw several fallen robed figures and two piles of ash, Laurel was nowhere to be seen and Nathan lay on the ground, clutching the intricate dagger that had felled him with a terrified look in his eyes. Above him his death timer was running out, giving him at best another ten minutes of life. ¡°Don''t let me die, Joe. Not like this. Not in a fricken video game.¡± He gasped. I searched my bags over and over, knowing full well that Laurel had all of the healing potions. ¡°I-I''m sorry Nate. Spaz had all the healing...¡± The immediate feeling that every ounce of blood just rushed out of me, caused me to sway a bit, but I fought it down, knowing that If I were to save him, I''d need to focus. The battle had ended, and the cultists that snatched Laurel got away, I rummaged through the pockets of the fallen, hoping that one of them would have a healing item. AHA! A low/mid-level bandage. This might stabilize him! Rushing back to Nathan, I cut away his clothes to inspect the damage, and my heart sunk again. The dagger was serrated. If I pulled it out, it would finish his death timer. (I think I might have a solution.) Jerking my head up, hope swelled in my chest as the voice spoke directly into his mind. ¡°Chen! What you got?¡± (Mister Stone is going to die. I can¡¯t stop that, but I''ve been researching the code alterations, and where I see stubs for resurrection, I get an encrypted mess of code. I got it mostly decrypted, but all I found was this one audio file, which said: ¡°To find life anew, seek you the Goddess, and you will find clarity¡±) ¡°What the fuck, Chen. How is that going to help?¡± (I''m going to hack the resurrection code and bring it back online. His body is OK, the pods you''re all in really are repurposed stasis pods. As soon as he passes, I''m going to turn the stasis feature back on.) ¡°You can do that? Why not do it now?¡± (Because if he dies here, you get a body to resurrect. If I turn it on, he''s logged out and he''ll die in the real world. Ain''t no rez here. We gotta keep this on the down-low, though, lest my hi-jinx be discovered. That might cause a system-wide security issue. Trust me, you don''t want that.) ¡°What would happen?¡± (First thing, would be a reaction to sever all connections to the world...) Ah. How stupid of me. Connections. Like me. ¡°Yeah. OK. I get it. Down-low.¡± I admit that I cried as I held him in my arms. Nathan was (is!) my best buddy. We grew up together, faced all of the same troubles together, and overcame them together. As his last breath passed, he uttered one final message to me. ¡°You better bring me back, asshole.¡± I smiled bitterly, the tears and snot flowing freely. I held him tight for a moment, then lay him flat once more. ¡°I will. I promise.¡± *** I should have known something was wrong when Laurel''s physical therapist was the one to get us into the Infinita launch event. I mean every gamer worth his salt in Cascadia, hell, The United States of North America, or pretty much any country on this planet of ours would have sold a kidney to get into.This text was taken from Royal Road. Help the author by reading the original version there. Jumping onto the opportunity, my buddy Nate and I met Laurel at her PT''s office. Let''s just say when we woke up from our surprise surgeries, we were beyond the point of no return. On one hand, we were medically violated, having had illegal implants put into our freaking brains! (Yeah, yeah. Those implants are needed for you to perform your job. Just because your nation considers them to be illicit hacking tools, doesn''t mean they''re not useful for other things, like keeping you alive, or Miss Pendergrass''s therapy.) So that disembodied voice is Chen. He''s our handler, he works for ******* and they... (Sorry Mr. Garcia, I''m going to have to censor you. Company policy.) Dammit ...sorry about that. On the other hand, we now had access to the net 24/7 as if we were wearing Castgoggles. Then again, on the other other hand ¨Cthat''s three now, right? ¨C there''s a Chinese guy in our heads now, giving us direction and advice. I suppose that''s a good thing, considering the circumstances. (And considering your atrocious math skills, I''d guess you were ''Murican) ¡­In hindsight, I should have realized that things were going a bit pear-shaped when CLARA, the Artificial Intelligence that controls, well, basically the entirety of the Democratic process in our small country went missing. (That wasn''t us, by the way.) For a cloud-based, AI of her complexity to simply vanish without a trace seemed impossible. The immediate result of the void she left behind, was that the daily local and weekly provincial votes could no longer be done live via the Castnet, and forced the powers that be to scramble to find a solution and keep the populous from losing it. They weren''t very successful. OK, the voting system was saved by bringing back CLARA version C. She was quirky, and not nearly as intelligent as the version we had. but she got the job done. But keeping the citizenry calm didn''t go so well. It was a pretty hairy time for a while there. Looking back, it seems an obvious distraction tactic. When the four thousand players were taken into The Facility, a huge unmarked cement building tucked away in the Cascades and inserted into the game, the press was too busy to give more than token coverage. And when people started dying ¨Ca lot of people¨C there was near silence about it. ...Well, not page one stuff, anyway. Now, when I say inserted, I mean inserted. The details had been held secret to the public, All except the phrase ¡°Deep Dive¡±. It seems the technology for complete mental transference into a game had finally been realized. We had each been met by three technical bots, who ushered us into small cubicles, and with such speed and efficiency that we had no real chance to object, stripped and prepared us for insertion into what appeared to me, old prewar medical stasis pods that they used to rescue the injured during the Second War of Independence. At that point, I found myself in a vast room, empty of decor save for a line of large arched wooden doors along one wall, wearing a simple outfit consisting of a roughspun tunic, pants, belt and sandals of varying shades of bleh. The other players, similarly equipped, milled around excitedly chatting among each other. Jose? Nate? Where are you? Laurel''s voice spoke through the implant. I spun around, scanning for my lovely girl, and although she was taller than most, and her springy ginger locks normally stuck out, the crowd was simply too large. Here, babe. Meet you guys at the furthest left door. Roger that, Joe. Nathan''s voice piped in smugly. As I made my way through the crowd, I noticed that I could smell the room, it''s occupants perspiring in excitement and the lack of deodorants made for quite a spicy scent. No doubt it would become quite funky after a few hours. I finally reached my destination, quite impressed with the details the game designers have gone through to ensure complete immersion. *** A booming voice broadcast out of thin air, immediately causing the room to quiet, and look for its source. ¡°Welcome to the opening event of Infinita, and we here at InfiniCorp are very pleased to have you here!¡± The crowd cheered and clapped with enthusiasm for the disembodied voice. ¡°We ask that everyone invoke their console now.¡± The light dimmed and soon a sea of holographic windows popped up, casting neon blue light throughout the room, followed by a susurrus of whispers. ¡°You may have noticed that your appearances aren''t the avatars you pre-designed. We have, in accordance with the Honesty in Internet Activity act, disabled avatars, and provided your legal persona in its place.¡± A grumbling from the crowd rose momentarily then silenced as the voice spoke again. ¡°If you''re going to participate as a party, please be sure to add your friends before entering the game, as the doors you see here send individuals to random locations in game, but parties go as a group. Once in game, you''ll find a starter kit nearby. One final thing before we open the gates: Everything is real, anything is possible. Welcome to Infinita!¡± The doors creaked and groaned, opening wide to reveal swirling energy filling their frames. A shiver of excitement passed through the room, as people started passing through the gates both solo and in groups. Joe. You group us, I want you to be the leader, Nathan urged. I pulled open the menu again and found the grouping menu. Tapping the appropriate icons, I sent Laurel and Nate group requests, both of which were immediately accepted. As I approached the door, I saw them standing there grinning. ¡°You kids excited yet?¡± I grinned back at them, and pulled Laurel into my arms, delivering a quick buss on the lips. Laurel''s face twitched, pulling into a brief grimace, which she quickly got under control. ¡°Woo! I can''t believe how realistic that felt.¡± ¡°That''s my Spaz.¡± I goosed her and spun her around towards the door. ¡°Let''s become legends.¡± Chapter Two Chapter Two At almost six feet tall, Laurel literally stood out from the crowd, what with her willowy form and her wild spray of curly ginger hair, but what really stood out was her smile. It was so bright that sometimes, I forgot everything else around me. It was not always the case, though. When we first met, she was antisocial and withdrawn. If she hadn''t come into my shop, I don''t think she would have ever given me a second thought. I''m nothing special to look at, but what I do have is humor, and that seemed to do the trick. When she returned the next day, I managed to score a lunch date. We went to a bistro that overlooked the Willamette River, and I was a bit surprised that she insisted that we eat outdoors, as it was a bit chilly. The wine we shared helped with the chill, and despite my best wordplay and sharpened wit, she would not break. Oh, she got the jokes, and I could tell she followed my repartee without a pause, indeed she could return it as fast as I could serve it. However, she would sit there, her face a mask of detached amusement, if it weren''t for her beautiful smiles, I might have just given up. I''ll be honest. It hurt my pride. I normally have rooms laughing. It''s kind of my thing, you know? But despite how poorly I thought things were going, she always suggested another date. At one point I had even wondered if she was asexual. I mean, I know it happens, but most people have gene therapy to fix it shortly after puberty. Turns out that wasn''t the case. After a month or so of dinner dates, walks in the park and/or holos, we were in downtown McMinnville for the yearly UFO festival. The streets bustled with manic energy, and the city had spent quite a lot on augment artists, so the sky was full of holographic alien spacecraft, and stall vendors were all sorts of alien life that only existed when viewed through Castgoggles. That''s when it happened. Laurel had been leaning over to inspect some handmade jewelry laid out in precise rows on a woven woolen blanket, when someone bumped her quite rudely, causing her to windmill and as if in slow motion, fall into the street. My utterly random ability to snatch falling things out of the air kicked in, causing me to step into the street momentarily, directly into the path of a double-decker tour bus filled to the brim with bulbous headed aliens, swing an arm around her waist ¨C surprisingly light! ¨C and spin us both back out of harm¡¯s way. I stood there, my arm around her waist, as she gaped in amazement at not only her fall, but almost immediate rescue from imminent danger. Sensing my moment, I pulled her in for a kiss. Now, this moment stays with me like no other. Our lips met, hers soft and mine, well, I don''t really have a point of reference, but I like to assume that I''m passable. She stiffened up, and I thought ¡°Oh shit, did I just fuck this up?¡±. Then the spasms started, her legs buckled, and had I not been holding her, she would have fallen to the ground, her arms flailed and head jerked, as if she had Saint Vitus''s Dance. I slowly lowered her to the ground before tapping my goggles and shouting ¡°Clara! Call 911!¡± The AI had placed the call nanoseconds after the command had escaped my lips, and had inbound EMT''s within minutes, landing nearby, the robotic ambulance dilated open, accepted us gently and whisked us away to the closest emergency facility. It could have been minutes, but it certainly felt like hours, I sat staring in silence in the bright white waiting room, with its pervasive antiseptic scent, uninteresting magazines and crowd of tired and injured people. Eventually an orderly came out to meet me. ¡°Sir, Miss Pendergrass has asked me to give you this.¡± He handed a folded piece of paper over, and headed back. I opened the note, which read: Jose, You should probably go. -L Now, I had no idea what was going on in her mind, but there was no way that I was going to just leave. So I sat there, for another whole eternity, maybe even an eternity-and-a-half, until she finally emerged, looking slightly deflated and more than slightly unhappy. She noticed me, as I rose from my seat, and looked away, trying to scoot past me. ¡°Laurel. Stop. I''m sorry!¡± I snagged her arm in passing This did indeed stop her, right in her tracks. She looked at me in confusion. ¡°Yeah, I''m sorry, really really, utterly and infinitely sorry. I thought it would be OK...¡± I trailed off, desperately trying to find my words. ¡°For what?" She said, in a half-mumble. ¡°Ah, er... kissing you? I thought it was the right moment. I''m so sorry. I didn''t take your feelings into consideration...¡± Laurel''s laugh rang out, her face illuminated with one of her dazzling smiles, which drew attention from the others who sat more-or-less patiently for service. She closed the distance between us and kissed me, hard. A beat later, she began twitching, albeit significantly less than last time. She broke the kiss and rested her forehead on mine. ¡°I have a condition. I have to avoid extremes of emotion, or I spaz out. The doctors dosed me with Diazepam. It calms the tremors a lot. But ...I have an uncommon reaction to it as well.¡± Pulling away, she stared with fiery intensity, eyes fully dilated. Confused, I felt myself drawn into her eyes. ¡°Y-yeah?¡± ¡°I''ll explain back at my place.¡± Her breath caught in her throat, as she pulled me towards the door. A stupid smile broke out on my face as she led me out, ¡°Yes. Yes, you will.¡± *** The portal delivered the three of us to a clearing in a wooded thicket, a fragrant breeze brought the scent of lavender and honeysuckle to our noses, and the light of the setting sun gave a warm golden look to everything. ¡°Bingo Bongo!¡± Nathan shouted, pointing at three crates laying on the ground, a scroll was stuck to the top of one of the crates with a plain iron dagger. ¡°Woo hoo, loot!¡± Laurel did a little hop of joy. I rolled my eyes. ¡°Calm down, kids. This is our starter equipment¡±. Nathan dashed to the crates, jerked out the dagger, and squinted at the paper. ¡°Hey, it''s a FAQ! LOL.¡± ¡°Lol? Wha?¡± Laurel peeked over his shoulder, which was no mean feat, as Nathan was minuscule compared to her, at a mere five and a half feet tall. She laughed as she inspected it. ¡°You can scroll the scroll!¡± She touched it and wiggled it up and down the face of the paper, making the print follow, making record scratching sounds. Nate handed it to Laurel, who grinned and began scanning the page with interest. He then inspected the boxes (OK team. Here''s how we do things. Any time you see an interesting object, NPC or effect, you call out for me, and I copy the code. Got it?)A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation. I nodded to myself ¡°Got it.¡± ¡°Hey hey! ''ow do I look guv?¡± Nathan strutted around wearing a dark green quilted jerkin that he had pulled from his crate. ¡°Like a very bad ren faire attendee. What else you got in there?¡± I gestured to his crate. ¡°Oh, ah. Let''s see...¡± He started pulling things out of the crate and dropping them on the ground. ¡°Ahm, a book titled Practical thievery and you, by a Mr. Joachin Behinyou, OOH! A matching bomber helmet, apparently,¡± He picked it up quickly and slipped on the leather hat, mugging for Laurel and I, ¡°A raggedy cloth belt, and three, no, four pouches to put on it.¡± He slipped the pouches on his belt before cinching it over his small pot belly. I opened and looked into my crate with interest, ¡°What ¡®bout you, babe?¡± Laurel''s squeal of delight tore my attention from my new gear. She did a pirouette in her new robe, a pale blue affair, made of rough wool. She shimmied about, withdrawing her arms into the robe, and with a surprisingly deft move, shucked off her pants and tunic that were underneath, and kicked them to the side. Grinning, I pulled my attention away from the delectable derriere that swayed from side to side, as she examined the contents of her crate, and onto my own. Inside was a suede jerkin studded with iron rings, A belt, like Nathan''s, a small hatchet, and, ¡­. a large pot lid. Yeah. A large pot lid, suitable for covering cooking pots with, and a dagger similar to the one that held the scroll to the crate. ¡°Nate, catch!¡± I lobbed him the dagger, which he deftly caught and tucked into his belt. ¡°Dual wield, yo.¡± ¡°Affirmative, boss.¡± ¡°Spaz, you get anything interesting?¡± ¡°Two books. Potions and poisons by Al Kemmy and Sorcery: A Primer by A. Kadabra, ...oh! And some empty bottles.¡± ¡°Any weapons?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Just as well, I don¡¯t want you fighting. I want you supporting. Study those books.¡± ¡°Yes, boss!¡± She chirped, and flipped through the book on sorcery, wandering to the comforting shade of a nearby tree to read. ¡°Nate!¡± I turned, looking for my diminutive friend. ¡°Here!¡± he replied, and as he did so, faded into view. My eyebrows shot up. ¡°Nice!¡± He grinned with manic energy ¡°I know! I¡¯m just glad I won¡¯t have to depend on this sad sack of shit to be a good rogue,¡± he gestured at himself flamboyantly, pausing for a sexy pose. ¡°I know you have the skills, bro. We¡¯ve been doing this for years.¡± ¡°I¡¯m feelin¡¯ a need for range. You have anything for me?¡± he asked, peeking in my crate. ¡°I got nothin¡¯. You gonna have to wait till we find a vendor or grab some rocks.¡± Nathan scowled and scratched his belly lazily as he looked around. ¡°Meh. Beggars can¡¯t be choosers, I guess.¡± He sighed ¡°Imma sneak around, get the hang of this and scout the area, maybe find some nice throwing rocks.¡± *** By the time Nate returned from skulking about, my stomach had told me that it was time to eat. Meandering towards Laurel, I rubbed my stomach, and felt it gurgle impatiently at me. ¡°Babe, I¡¯m getting hungry. You guys wanna log and go hit a pizza joint? Nathan heard this and shouted ¡°Pizza! Hells to the yes, boss!¡± Laurel was engrossed in reading, thoughtfully chewing the end of one of her ginger curls. She suddenly realized I had spoken to her. ¡°Uh, what?¡± She released her grip on her hair, letting it spring back into place ¡°Pizza. Hungry.¡± Nate chimed in ¡°Pizza! Pizza!¡± ¡°Oh! Um. Sure.¡± She dog eared her place in the book and stood, adjusting her robe. ¡°Houston, we have a problem.¡± Nate said with an ominous tone of voice. I blinked twice and turned towards him, ¡°beg pardon?¡± ¡°I can¡¯t find the log out button.¡± Nathan was swiping left and right through his interface, his tone, moving from ominous to distinctly worried. Sure enough, I could not find it either. This caused me to pause, and chew my lip, as I sometimes did when things went off-script. ¡°Chen, you have any idea?¡± (I was on it the moment Nathan mentioned it. Hang tight, please.) I let loose a sigh of relief, ¡°OK, Chen. Do your thing.¡± (He¡¯s right. I know I saw it in the briefing room, when everyone was poking around the menus.) ¡°Well shit. What are we going to do about food? Sleep?¡± Nathan shouted crossly. (You a boy scout?) I nudged Nathan with my improv shield, ¡°Nate. Take it down a notch. Chen¡¯s right. We need food and shelter now. Did you spot any place we can use for shelter?¡± ¡°Yeah, I guess. I saw a cave in the hill to the south. Not too far off. You can almost see it from here.¡± ¡°What about food?¡± Laurel said, stowing her book into a belt pouch. Shrugging my shoulders, I looked to the sky, ¡°We might be able to eat whatever is living in the cave. It¡¯s gotta be our starter dungeon.¡± Nathan scowled, ¡°Better be infested with pizza monsters.¡± *** Although We had not gone more than eight feet into the cave, it had gotten too dark to see ¡°Hmm.¡± I had not considered this. The usual deal was torches that never seemed to burn out or magical glowing crystals ¡°Alright. Everyone out.¡± I ushered the others back out into the light. Squinting at the sun, I realized that I had no idea how fast time flowed in game. Most games compressed time, so that casual players could still partake in events that took place at certain times. ¡°Nate.¡± ¡°Boss.¡± ¡°You notice if time is sped up?¡± Nathan looked at the sky. And hemmed to himself. ¡°Don¡¯t think so. We¡¯ve been here a while now, and I haven¡¯t noticed anything. I think we¡¯re 1:1 here.¡± ¡°Great! So we have a few hours before the sun sets. So, let¡¯s get a fire going, and try to explore that cave.¡± ¡°Spaz, do you have anything in that book about light spells?¡± Laurel sprung to attention and pulled out her spellbook, ¡°let me see¡± She flipped through the book slowly, ¡°Is that an illusion or conjuration?¡± Nate pointed to our mage-in-training ¡°Could be either. I¡¯ve seen it as both in various games. Also check fire spells, sometimes you get those¡± I snapped my fingers, ¡°You¡¯re right. The torch spell.¡± Nathan looked smug ¡°what can I say, I know my shit.¡± Laurel frowned, ¡°get a room, you two ¡­. ah! Eureka!¡± I rubbed my palms together and grinned ¡°Ok. What we got.¡± Laurel tugged on a curl as she read from the book ¡°It says Spirit Lamp 0 of 2¡± She tapped the wood-block drawing of a lamp that dominated the page. Her eyes lit up. ¡°Woo! It¡¯s a button. I got a popup.¡± Nathan peeked at her book, and frowned. ¡°I can¡¯t see it, what¡¯s it say?¡± ¡°Are you sure you want to learn this spell? Yes/No¡± She looked torn. ¡°looks like I only get two spells, should I learn it?¡± Pursing my lips, I thought for a moment and sighed, ¡°Yeah, do it. Choose something offensive with the second one, though.¡± Laurel tapped the invisible button and dropped her book with a squeak of surprise. Her hands made arcane gestures and a pale peach glow traced her hands movements. With a hollow echo, she uttered ¡°Spiritus Lucerna¡± A glowing orb of pale blue fire sprung into existence between her extended hands, then drifted upwards settling in above and behind her right shoulder. ¡°That was surreal. It was like I was on rails! My hands did the motions on their own.¡± ¡°Cool. Now let¡¯s go explore that cave while that spell lasts.¡± Nathan gestured to the cave with his eyes. *** An hour later, the three of us sat around the campfire that we had set up in the rear of the cave, staring at the fire. Laurel¡¯s stomach growled loudly, ¡°Slimes. Just slimes. Giant rats I¡¯d have been okay with.¡± ¡°Yeah, that¡¯d be like nutria or guinea pigs.¡± Nathan moaned. ¡°Aw man! Now I want guinea-kebabs¡± I sighed, the scent of sizzling meat wafting through my imagination drove me to distraction. ¡°I¡¯ll say one thing; Portland¡¯s street food is the best.¡± Nathan looked glumly into the fire. ¡°You got that right.¡± We all sighed gloomily. Laurel fingered a bright blue, egg-shaped stone she found in the cave after the first swarm of slimes. ¡°Joe, this is kinda weirding me out. We¡¯re stuck in this game. What if we can¡¯t ever get out?¡± ¡°Ah, don¡¯t worry, babe. It¡¯s gotta be a bug, I¡¯m sure it¡¯ll be straightened out pronto.¡± I squeezed her shoulder and pulled her closer. Nate stood and stretched, yawning. ¡°I¡¯mma hit the hay.¡± ¡°Yeah. Go ahead. You too, babe. I¡¯ll keep watch.¡± I nudged Laurel gently, making her sway gently. She blinked sleepily and nodded. ¡°Yeah OK. G¡¯night¡± She curled up by the fire and quickly fell asleep, a peaceful look on her face. I smiled, looking at the two of them, snoozing around the fire. I admit, I was somewhat worried about the lack of a logout function. Maybe there was a stability issue that was making logout risky. But no reason to worry the others. Well. Better safe than sorry. *** The morning broke with the sound of overly enthusiastic songbirds going at it full blast. ¡°Good morning, sunshine.¡± Nathan said, tossing a pine cone at my head. ¡°Ah. Yeah. ¡®morning, Nate. I must have fallen asleep.¡± I rolled to my feet and dusted the leaves and dirt off of me. ¡°Where¡¯s spaz?¡± He jerked a thumb behind him. ¡°Taking a leak.¡± Sure enough, Laurel came out of the brush, adjusting her robe. Her face brightened, as she saw me. ¡°Hi sweetie. What¡¯s our plan for today?¡± ¡°Well, I think since we are temporarily stuck here, we need to up our foraging and camping game, or we¡¯re gonna be really hungry and tired, our performance will really suffer if that happens.¡± Nathan nodded. ¡°The man has a point. I was an Eagle Scout, so I suppose¡­¡± He drew out the last word as he looked around. ¡°Ok you two. Go kill some more slimes while I hustle us up some food. ¡°Wait, Nate. I can probably gather edible plants with a skill in my alchemy skill tree.¡± Nathan paused a half-beat. ¡°Er, herbalism? Or gathering?¡± Laurel beamed. ¡°Both actually. Only one pip in each, but I have them.¡± ¡°Good. Boss, change of plan. You try and make our camp a little more livable while we¡¯re gone.¡± I nodded. It was a solid plan. ¡°Don¡¯t go too far, I want to be able to get to you If I hear fighting.¡± The two of them gave me sloppy salutes and headed into the trees. Returning the salute, I looked at the hatchet that dangled on my belt and peered at the nearby trees. ¡°Hmm. Better get on it.¡± Chapter three

Chapter Three

Eight years ago Although the sun had gone down well over an hour ago, the temperature was almost unbearable. I took another hard look at the daunting mountain of boxes that sat on the unfolded shipper unit, in the front lawn of my family¡¯s new house. I knew that we could afford robotic movers, but my old man was stubborn. He insisted that a little hard work now and then did a person some good. ¡°Hmm, better get on it.¡± I rolled up my sleeves and began staging the boxes into separate piles for each room. I knew my father would be home in a few hours, but if I got a significant portion of it done, my old man might throw me some coin. I flopped to the lawn in exhaustion. The grass was itchy but comfortable and I found that the breeze had picked up, which suited me nicely. A voice came from over the hedge that divided our property from the house next to us, ¡°Hey, you the new neighbor?¡± I sat and squinted in the direction of the voice, ¡°I guess so.¡± ¡°Good enough for me, ¡­trampoline launch!¡± He whooped and came flying over the hedge, and rolled to a stop, arms and legs splayed widely nearby. The boy was smaller than me, and was what mothers would call ¡®husky¡¯. He appeared a little worse for the wear and raised a thumb at me, ¡°I¡¯m OK!¡± I laughed at his antics, ¡°My name is Jose, what¡¯s yours?¡¯ He grinned, ¡°Nate. Pleased ta meetcha!¡± His arm flopped down and he groaned in pain as he stood, dusting the grass from himself as he rose. And that was how my closest friendship began: acrobatically. *** The present After a solid half-hour of chopping, my axe proficiency managed to rise five points, and all I had to show for it was a smallish stack of mangled wood. Sigh. I suppose that will do for firewood. I had hoped to craft some simple viking chairs, like the ones I saw at the SCA¡¯s Cascadian wargame back in ¡¯76, which was just two simple pieces of lumber fitted together, however I had expected too much from the crafting system, I would have to do everything, no shortcuts! Since I didn¡¯t have any real tools, I was limited in my products. Since the area in front of the cave was a little sandy, I had little trouble getting small and medium sized rocks to build a proper firepit. As I rolled the last stone into place, I loaded some of the wood into it, and stacked the rest just inside the cave mouth so it could dry. The underbrush rustled and Laurel appeared, tears streaming down her cheeks. I dashed towards her, arms outstretched, ¡°what happened?¡± Laurel smiled as she rubbed the tears away with the backs of her hands. ¡°Killer Onions!¡± She raised her other hand and held aloft four onion plants by the stems, except where the roots ought to be, were strangely muscular little human legs, ¡°They sprayed me when I tore off their arms.¡± I blinked twice, trying to make sense of it.This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author''s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon. ¡°You ¡­tore off their arms?¡± She looked at me like I was crazy, ¡°Well yeah, they ambushed me while I was collecting herbs.¡± ¡°¡­but their arms?¡± ¡°They had weapons! I don¡¯t! Plus they look like they¡¯d be delicious grilled.¡± I looked at the onions again and nodded. She had a point. Grilled onions were pretty good. Hopefully Nathan would return with some rabbits or something. ¡°Fair enough. What else did you get?¡± I peered at her bulging pouches ¡°Oh, some healing herbs and some spices. The herbs are really weak, but If I use them with some other stuff, I can make a low level healing potion. The spices are a bit weird though.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°Ah, just chew on one, you¡¯ll understand.¡± She reached into her pouch and pulled out a handful of herbs, and held them out for me. Curious, I took one and gave it a sniff. My eyebrows shot up in surprise. I stuck in into my mouth and chewed it gently. The distinct flavor of bubblegum filled my mouth, so weird! Laurel grinned widely as she saw my expression, ¡°I know, right!?¡± ¡°Bubble gum!¡¯ OK that¡¯s cool, but¡­ I can¡¯t imagine using it to flavor anything.¡± ¡°That¡¯s where you¡¯re wrong. Taste this,¡± she held out a second herb for me. ¡°That¡¯s the healing herb.¡± I took it and bit down, and immediately spit it out, desperately trying to scrape the taste off of my tongue with my fingers. ¡°Gah,¡± I said desperate to clear this flavor out of my mouth. Laurel handed me a second bubblegum herb, which I chewed vigorously. Unsurprisingly, its pleasant flavor dulled the awfulness that was the healing herbs flavor and eventually replaced it. ¡°I¡¯m going to use it to remove the nasty flavor of healing potions. I got the idea from the way pharmacies flavor medicine for children.¡± She grinned, her excitement growing. ¡°You are one smart cookie, you know that?¡± I pulled her in for a bubblegum flavored kiss, which she drew out for a deliciously long time. ¡°I know. I wasn¡¯t always a model, you know?¡± She winked and looked at my handiwork, ¡°We have a while before sundown, so I¡¯ll let you get back to it.¡± She pulled the pouch off her belt and handed it to me. ¡°Can you lay these out to dry? I¡¯m going back for more.¡± She dropped the Killer Onions near the firepit and headed back to the field she was harvesting in. I looked at the pouch and thought about what I¡¯d need to do that properly. Hm. I¡¯d want a rack of some sort, or a large cloth maybe. Neither of which I happened to have. I had my starter tunic, but I¡¯d need it later, I¡¯m sure¡­ ¡°Ah!¡± I had a bright idea! I took a second look at the trees around me. There were trees that resembled willows with long thin branches nearby. I had ignored them at first, because I didn¡¯t think they would make very good firewood, but for this¡­. An hour later, I had stripped several trees bare of limbs and had taken the bark off in long strips. From the new materials, I had been creating a sort of woven wicker mat, tied together with the strips of bark. As I finished my handiwork, I received a system message informing me that my handcraft skill had gone up by ten points. Cool! I¡¯d be able to make better things down the road, for sure! I set my mind to making a second item, a wicker backpack! It would basically be a basket with some braided bark ropes to slip my arms through. If the guys were going to be taking advantage of the craftsman skills, I reckoned that we¡¯d be needing it since we only had four slot inventories provided by the game. Those four slots would be used to store treasure and important things, so they wouldn¡¯t be dropped by accident. As the day stretched on, I lit the fire with some tinder and a spark from some flint and my hatchet. As the fire grew in strength, Laurel and Nathan returned, both loaded down with the results of their labor. ¡°Whatcha got there?¡± ¡°Rabbits and a wild bird!¡± ¡°¡­How?¡± I asked, baffled by the amazing haul. ¡°Stealth, baby!¡± Nate crowed. ¡°They never saw me coming.¡± ¡°Good Job!¡± I clapped him on the back and turned my attention to the beautiful one. ¡°How about you, sweetie?¡± Laurel held out four more Killer Onions and another bulging pouch. ¡°More onions, herbs, and some wild potatoes!¡± ¡°I think we have a meal here guys!¡± I took the spoils from them and laid them on the drying mat I had made. ¡°Ah I¡¯ll be right back!¡± Nathan exclaimed, dashing back into the woods. ¡°Better hurry, we¡¯re losing daylight!¡± Laurel shouted after him. ¡°Ya!¡± He replied as he disappeared. *** As I had just prepared the rabbits for cooking and thoroughly mangled the pelts in the process, sadly, Nathan returned from his excursion and pulled out a big wad of clay, about a foot wide. ¡°What¡¯s that for? Crafting?¡± I asked, curious. ¡°Nah! For the potatoes! He took a handful of clay in one hand and one of the small potatoes in the other and began covering it with clay. Once it was covered in a thick layer of clay, he dropped in the ashes at the edge of the fire. ¡°Aha! Baked potatoes!¡± Laurel said, as she realized his thought process. ¡°Those scouting days are paying off, Nate.! He flushed in excitement, ¡°If I had a trap, I could get us some fish from the river where I got the clay¡­¡± Nathan¡¯s eyes lit upon the backpack I had crafted, then down to the mat. ¡°Joe? Can you make me one of those? And maybe add an inverted funnel to the mouth? Because you basically made a fish trap there.¡± Nice! We¡¯re eating fish tomorrow! ¡°I¡¯ll do it first thing in the morning.¡± As the three of us ate our fill of herb-roasted rabbits, a wild bird, with sides of onions and baked potatoes, we settled down for the night. Chapter four Day three Despite having improved the sleeping arrangements, I woke with an aching back. I sat up and blinked my bleary eyes, somewhat perplexed that these little things had been captured so accurately by the game. Nate was poking around the ashes of the now-cold firepit with a stick. Seeing me rouse, he grinned, ¡°Hey boss. Just checking to see if there were any of those baked potatoes left over from last night.¡± I nodded and grunted as I stood and looked around. ¡°We have to get stuff accomplished today, or we¡¯ll be behind the curve.¡± ¡°Yeah, you¡¯re right. We aced our starter dungeon, picked up some skills, but we need to get to a city. There¡¯s got to be an adventurer¡¯s guild or something with quests.¡± What can I say? The man is right. Quests would surely be the most efficient way to level up, as well as build social points with the NPC¡¯s. I gently roused Laurel with a foot to the rump. She, as usual just grunted and ignored me. A second, less gentle nudge rocked her body slightly. To this, she responded by grunting louder and flailing an arm in my general direction. I winked at Nate and jerked a finger at Laurel, ¡°Who wants coffee?¡± Like magic, Laurel sprung upright with a smile, ¡°Did someone say coffee?¡± I snickered, ¡°Yeah, I said it, but we¡¯re still stuck in a game.¡± ¡°You bastard!¡± Laurel pouted and crossed her arms. ¡°But we¡¯re going to pack up and find some at the closest inn. Promise.¡± Nate added. She stood, wobbly, ¡°Ya better.¡± ¡°Yes, love. First thing.¡± I helped her to her feet and began packing our things into the backpack I had made the day before. ¡°Hey, did I give you a second batch of herbs to dry last night?¡± I cocked my head in recollection, ¡°Pretty sure you didn¡¯t. We just ate and slept.¡± ¡°Yeah, I didn¡¯t think so, but the pouch I had them in is empty now.¡± She felt around in the pouch, ¡°Ah! Except for my lucky stone,¡± She held up the egg-shaped stone we found when clearing out the slimes. ¡°I dunno, babe. Maybe they expired?¡± ¡°Hmm,¡± She inspected the stone carefully and pursed her lips. ¡°Was it always so porous? I remember it as being smooth.¡± ¡°Chen, are you awake?¡± Laurel asked sweetly. (Am now. What¡¯s up?) ¡°Analyze this item please?¡± (What, the rock?) ¡°Please.¡± (Nice catch! That¡¯s not a rock at all.) ¡°Well, what the heck is it then?¡± (I¡¯ll show you.) A console window popped up in front of Laurel.
GEL CORE RARITY: RARE DURABILITY: 3/3 Hunger: 0/10 Thirst: 10/10 This Gel core was found in a slime colony. It has been fed on low-level healing herbs, it has bonded with Laurel. It is dehydrated. If it is not immersed in water soon, it will die.
¡°Ooh! Water! Nate, do we have a container to use?¡± she stroked the stone in her hand. ¡°Nate looked around briefly, ¡°No, not really. I was using a big folded leaf as a cup, but I threw it into the fire after I was finished.¡± ¡°Where was that stream you found?¡± She asked, her voice getting more impatient. Nate hooked a thumb behind him, ¡°Like five minutes that way.¡± ¡°Well,¡± she said thoughtfully, ¡°there¡¯s water in the cave.¡± I had finished packing all the things that would fit into the backpack, and slung it on, ¡°But that would mean clearing it again, and that would take hours. We¡¯re going to the stream. If we¡¯re going to find a town, we have to follow the water.¡± Nathan nodded, ¡°Where there¡¯s water, there¡¯s life.¡± ¡°OK! Lessgo,¡± Laurel nodded, as she continued to stroke the stone, ¡°C¡¯mon little guy, let¡¯s get you a drink of water.¡± *** As Nathan signaled us with a bird call, I put my arm out to slow Laurel, who looked up in confusion. ¡°What is it?¡± I squinted into the distance, but couldn¡¯t see anything. A few moments later, Nathan faded into view. ¡°There was trouble ahead at the stream, looks like some players passed through.¡± I ran my hand over my two-days¡¯ worth of whiskers I had accumulated, ¡°Anyone still around?¡± ¡°Pretty sure everyone¡¯s gone,¡± Nathan gestured, ¡°Let¡¯s take it slow, just in case.¡± I nodded, caution was never a bad thing. Nathan faded from sight again and went ahead. After giving him a few moments to get ahead of us, Laurel and I continued forward. As the stream came into view, the sight of a melee was apparent. Two bears had either attacked or been attacked and been killed. Looking at the wounds, I noticed that they had been made by weapons.
You have gained the Perception skill. Current rank: F (001/500)
A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation. ¡°Yeah. Either some players came through here or we have some armed roaming humanoids nearby. Nathan nodded, ¡°Did you see the footprints? Barefoot, might be human.¡± He was right, although I couldn¡¯t tell for sure. We hadn¡¯t seen any demihumans yet, so there was no way to be sure. Laurel had hiked up her robe and tucked it into her belt as she waded into the water. The sight of her thighs never ceases to be a matter of interest to me. ¡°Ooh!¡± Laurel exclaimed as the Gel core started absorbing water. A moment later, goo started to extrude from the pores on the rock until it seemed as if it were the nucleus of an apple-sized, red-hued slime. ¡°You¡¯re so cute! I¡¯m going to name you Ringo.¡± ¡°Ringo? Really?¡± Nathan scoffed, as he attempted to skin one of the bears. ¡°Why not? It means Apple in Japanese, and it looks like an apple! ¡­kinda.¡± She held it in her arms and snuggled it. A window popped up in front of her.
Ringo Lv. 1 Red Gel HP 2/2 SP 2/2 STR 1 INT 0 DEX 3 END 1 CHA 15 LUK 10 SKILLS: Healing slime Rank F (001/500) Ringo¡¯s abilities have been influenced by the food it was fed as it hatched. It can dissolve and eat any organic material but prefers healing herbs. Although non-intelligent, it seems to understand simple commands from its owner. It has bonded with Laurel Pendergrass
Grinning, I moved my attention to the bears. If it had been demihumans or local hunters, wouldn¡¯t they have taken the corpses? If not that, at least skinned them and taken some of the meat? Something didn¡¯t add up. ¡°Guys, this had to be players.¡± ¡°Yeah, who else would hunt and not take the spoils?¡± Nate piped in. ¡°Noobs,¡± I said, shaking my head in annoyance. ¡°I got this,¡± Nathan said, as he managed to skin the first one with little difficulty. Boy Scouts wasn¡¯t so nerdy after all, was it?¡± I laughed. ¡°No. It¡¯s still nerdy. Useful, but nerdy. Nate harrumphed at me but continued to disassemble the bear into his inventory. ¡°Let¡¯s get moving guys. These bears are going to attract scavengers soon.¡± Nathan waded into the water and rinsed the gore from himself, ¡°Yeah. I need to see civilization.¡± ¡°C¡¯mon, Spaz, we gotta get to town,¡± I scooped several handfuls of water into my mouth, grateful for the cold, freshness of it, then kissed Laurel briefly. ¡°Lessgo.¡± *** Finally, after hours of trekking, the signs of the city began peeking through the trees. It seemed every bit of a medieval walled city, down to the lightly armored guards who stood lazily by the city gated, armed with spears. ¡°You wanted civilization, you got civilization.¡± I opened my console briefly and added the city to my map. I reached over and tickled Laurel¡¯s gel, and was pleasantly surprised to find out that it was not slimy, but rather like a squishy latex toy. It leaned into my tickle, and my finger penetrated its membrane briefly, then pulled away. ¡°That¡¯s how it gets to know you. It takes a little taste.,¡± Laurel said, rubbing its lightly as she walked. ¡°I hope we don¡¯t have to pay to enter,¡± Nate patted his purse, ¡°I¡¯m skint¡± ¡°Well, I see a few stands outside the walls, I suppose we could sell something to them if we need to.¡± *** The three of us (four if you count Ringo) finally made it to the gate, where two guards made half-hearted attempts to stand at attention. ¡°Do you have anything to declare?¡± ¡°Nothing but some furs and herbs to sell.¡± ¡°IDs please.¡± We looked at each other briefly and turned back to the guards. ¡°Sorry, we don¡¯t have one yet.¡± One of the guards sighed, went to his guard post and retrieved a stone slate. ¡°We need to check your identity then, please place your hand on the slate.¡± The first guard said, gesturing to the plate his partner held. I nodded. I expected some sort of security, so this wasn¡¯t a big deal. I placed my hand on it, unsure of what to expect. ¡°Very good, nxt please,¡± The guard turned the slate to Nathan and Laurel who both took their turns with no obvious reaction. ¡°Excellent. It¡¯s good to see that you¡¯re law-abiding, please remain so, or you¡¯ll be dealt with strictly.¡± If you want to sell furs, head to the end of Market Street and talk to Henning, he gives the best prices. ¡°Is there an adventurer¡¯s guild in town?¡± Nathan asked. The guard nodded, ¡°It¡¯s the big building in the plaza. You can¡¯t miss it. ¡°How about a coffeehouse?¡± Laurel added. The guard stood silently for a moment, ¡°I¡¯m not sure what you mean.¡± Laurel sulked, ¡°I guess that means no coffee in game.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, hon. Maybe they have a nice tavern we can relax in once we get some cash.¡± That brightened her up somewhat. ¡°Well, that¡¯s something. Shall we hit the guild first?¡± I nodded. Getting quests equaled getting money, of which we had none. Nathan rubbed his nose, deep in thought. ¡°Spaz, were you going to use those herbs or sell ¡®em?¡± ¡°About half and half, I imagined some would level up my crafting, the rest would pay for the other crafting materials.¡± ¡°Well wait on that till after we visit the guild. Oftentimes starter quests involve collecting herbs and other menial tasks. You might have completed a quest ahead of time, and not known it.¡± ¡°Nice!¡± She fistpumped the air. As we made our way into the city, it was pretty obvious what was what, as the signs were designed so that illiterate people would still be able to understand them. The street opened up into a large plaza, displaying a large tree that dominated the canter of it. Below its branches were arranged benches so that people could relax under its shade. ¡°How pretty!¡± Laurel said in admiration. I noticed a large building, three stories tall that had to be the Adventurer¡¯s Guild. It¡¯s marble steps and columns gave it a very stately feeling. We headed inside and saw that there was a long counter of receptionists who were serving adventurers. On the far end of the counter, was a caged teller, who was apparently paying out quest rewards. ¡°OK guys, Let¡¯s inspect our data, before we register, in case there¡¯ some sort of choices we need to make.¡± We pulled our respective consoles up, and had a look at our stats:
Jose Garcia CLASS: Warrior | Level 1 STR 15 INT 13 DEX 12 END 13 CHA 16 LUK12 HP 25 STA 10 SKILLS: One-handed axe: Rank F (035/500) | Shield use: Rank F (001/500) Perception: Rank F (002/500) | Survival: Rank F (015/500) Handcrafting: Rank F (035/500) | Cooking: Rank F (015/500) TALENTS: Leadership: Rank F (002/500) | Mapping: Rank F (065/500) Indomitable Rank E (001/500)
Laurel Pendergrass CLASS: Magic-user | Level 1 STR 6 INT 18 DEX 15 END 10 CHA 20 LUK 10 HP 10 MP15 SKILLS: Magic use Rank F (020/500)| Alchemy: Rank F (080/500) Herbalism Rank F (095/500 | Unarmed combat Rank F (030/500) Gathering Rank F (095/500)| TALENTS: Beast training Rank F (020/500)|Hardworking Rank D (025/500) Spells: 1/2 Spirit lamp (003/500) MP 1 | Unassigned
Nathan Ballard CLASS: Rogue | Level 1 STR 10 INT 12 DEX 18 END 11 CHA 12 LUK 15 HP 15 STA 15 SKILLS: Daggers Rank F (020/500) | Dual wield (020/500) Stealth Rank F (100/500) | Ambush (010/500) Hunting Rank F (020/500) | Tracking (010/500) Archery Rank F (001/200) | Talents: Smooth Talker Rank D(005/500)
¡°Smooth talker?¡± I asked. Nathan laughed. ¡°I know my way around a word.¡± ¡°Yeah, yeah.¡± ¡°You haven¡¯t chosen your second spell yet?¡± I asked, ¡°Well, I didn¡¯t want to make the wrong choice, I thought I¡¯d choose according to the need.¡± Nathan nodded in agreement, ¡°True, but your skills get exp like everything else, if you don¡¯t use it, it doesn¡¯t get better.¡± ¡°You know, Nate, with your skillset you¡¯d make an awesome ranger,¡± I suggested. ¡°Yeah, but I really love stealth and traps and all that.¡± ¡° I completely understand. OK, let¡¯s get in line.¡± I got in the shortest line, and the others followed suit. *** The lady behind the desk was dressed in a neatly designed uniform that all the other tellers wore, it gave off a businesslike atmosphere while showcasing their feminine beauty in a respectable way. She folded her hands and smiled. ¡°How can I help you today, Mister¡­¡± She looked at the paperwork I had filled out, ¡°Garcia.¡± ¡°Ah, well I¡¯d like to join the guild, but I¡¯m not very well educated about it. If you wouldn¡¯t mind, please start from the ground up.¡± She nodded and examined his paperwork in more detail. ¡°It seems you¡¯re a warrior. I see some advanced class potential in your talents, but we¡¯ll have to see how they play out.¡± She closed my folder and rested her hands on it. ¡°OK. We are the Adventurer¡¯s guild. We are sponsored by all the governments in the world, so there¡¯s no fee to join. As members of the guild, you have access to guild stores at any branch of the Guild, where you can buy basic sundries to support you as you travel. As you complete the quests that you see there¡­¡± She leaned around him and pointed to a large board covered in requests,¡± ¡­ you gain a certain amount of points that give you your guild ranking. The higher your ranking, the harder the quests you can accept. Much like your skills, quests are rated at F, which is the lowest to SSS, which is the highest. As of now, you are good to accept grade F quests. You could technically take higher level ones, but the danger rises along with the rank. You are not allowed to take a rank 2 levels higher than you are. Is that clear so far? I nodded, ¡°Yes Ma¡¯am.¡± ¡°Excellent. This is the fine print. The Guild can force you to take a quest in the event of an emergency. You cannot refuse them in that instance. Do you understand?¡± I nodded again, ¡°Yes Ma¡¯am. I am on board.¡± She smiled and pulled out a thick scroll from her desk, and a silver-tipped quill pen. ¡°Then sign here please,¡± she unrolled the scroll and pointed to a line at the bottom. Not being a fool, I took the time to read the scroll. It had, in fact, retold the details exactly as she had presented them, so I took the pen and signed it. ¡°If you have questions or concerns, please feel free to contact any of us.¡± I nodded and rose from my seat, and headed to the quest board, wondering what sort of things the others had learned from their guild worker. Chapter five The quest board was divided into two sections; the first was official guild quests which were written on small index-card sized sheets of vellum, written in impeccably elegant handwriting, while the second was quests that were put up by individuals, which were generally on cheap paper, and oftentimes hard to read as the questgiver might well be semi-literate at best. The players who were milling about seemed for the most part, to ignore the unofficial quests. ¡°Aw, geeze,¡± Laurel said, turning her head. Curious, I had a look, and saw a trio of men who had just entered the guild and were headed to take a spot in the queue to see a guild attendant. That in itself was not interesting, What was unusual was that save for their helmets, they were completely nude!
Your perception skill has raised by 1! (003/500)
Man! I don¡¯t want to skill up from seeing that! But as if drawn to him, my eyes moved to another man who didn¡¯t seem the slightest bit surprised that was holding what appeared to be an eyeball made of energy that was aimed at the trio. A moment later, four guards stormed in, weapons drawn. The leader of them scowled and shouted, ¡°You are disturbing the peace. Submit or face the consequences!¡± The three men grinned at each other and turned to the guards, taking quasi-martial poses. ¡°Nude force Alpha will never surrender!¡± The guards nodded and within a few seconds had struck them down. ¡°Damn,¡± I shook my head in amazement. There are always idiots in online games. That fourth person who had been spectating deactivated whatever it was he was doing, and wandered outside, apparently happy with the outcome. ¡°Damned ViewTubers.¡± Nathan said as he approached the board. ¡°Yeah, anything to make a buck I suppose,¡± I noticed Laurel becoming super still, which I recognized as the start of a seizure. I pulled her to me and held her tightly. A few moments later, she relaxed somewhat and kissed me on the neck as she whispered, ¡°thank you.¡± ¡°Well guys,¡± I Began, ¡°Did your guild rep offer any interesting info?¡± Nathan shook his head, ¡°Not me, but I am honestly surprised at the AI this game has, she was really sharp.¡± ¡°Ah, no. I think she wasn¡¯t an NPC,¡± Laurel noted. My eyebrows rose, ¡°No?¡± She shook her head emphatically, ¡°Pretty sure she is an employee of the game.¡± ¡°How did you come to that conclusion?¡± Nathan said, crossing his arms. ¡°Ah, ok. Remember when we asked the guard about a coffeehouse? He got real still when we asked him something unexpected, right?¡± I nodded, she was right! ¡°And when I was in my interview, my attendant was very professional and intelligent, but I noticed her eyes dilated in reaction to me, as well as a few other tells,¡± Laurel grinned, ¡°She was attracted to me! Clearly she was trying to hide it, but I could tell.¡±Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site. ¡°You go, Ladykiller,¡± Nathan socked her on the shoulder gently. Laurel grinned, ¡°Who da best?¡± Nate and I replied, ¡°You da best!¡± ¡°Ah!¡± I plucked a quest from the board which read ¡®Goblin subjugation¡¯. ¡°I found our first quest!¡± Laurel and Nathan both got a pop-up when I took the quest, which shared it with them.
Goblin Subjugation Rank F The goblins have been raiding local farms and small villages, they must be stopped Rewards for this quest are dependent on the number of goblins subjugated. (waypoint added to map)
¡°Cool,¡± Nathan nodded. ¡°Yeah, but let¡¯s sell off and regear.¡± Laurel said, reaching down and feeling her belt pouch¡¯s fullness. ¡°The end of market street right?¡± I asked. ¡°Yeah, let¡¯s go.¡± Nathan said, striding to the swinging doors that led out to the bright morning traffic and exiting. *** The merchant, Henning was nearly in tears as Nate relayed a historic tale of sacrifice and heroism that revolved around the bear pelts he had produced from his inventory. It was indeed a privilege to see a master huckster ply his art. Even I got a little misty eyed when he solemnly explained how his father finally,after years of planning,got his revenge on these bears for killing his mother, but tragically died in the process, necessitating the sale of the pelts to cover the funeral expenses. It was unbearably emotional. It was also 100% bullshit, very moving bullshit, but bullshit nevertheless. At this point, the merchant wanted to adopt Nathan as his own son, but Nathan sadly had to reject his offer, but not before accepting more than triple the original offer for the pelts. With sad goodbyes, and promises to return, Nathan led us back to the plaza, with us fully equipped and a jingle in our pockets. Nathan grinned, ¡°Like I said, I know my way around a word.¡± At that, we all started laughing. *** I had been chatting with Laurel about the adventurer¡¯s guild when it dawned on me, I had no idea what the name of the town was! I didn¡¯t expect a sign that read ¡®Welcome to _______¡¯ or anything, but you know, the NPC¡¯s could have at least mentioned it, right? Argh. OK. Anyway. We had been traveling for about a day and a half and had set up camp as nightfall was creeping up on us. (Guys.) Laurel brightened, ¡°Chen! What¡¯s the word?¡± (I have ¡­news) ¡°That almost sounds like you omitted the word ¡®bad¡¯, Chen,¡± Nathan said as he dug into a piece of mutton. (That¡¯s because I did.) ¡°Oh shit. What¡¯s up?¡± My attention now fully on him, my hands stilled, the piece of wood I had been whittling now forgotten. (There has been some ¡­accidents. Some players have died. It¡¯s being covered up, but it¡¯s my job to know things.) ¡°Well, do you know what happened?¡± I asked. (As far as I can tell, when people die, they¡¯re forced logged out, but since the log out function has been disabled, the players in the pods have gone brain-dead. They¡¯re completely blank. If it weren¡¯t for the pods themselves, they¡¯d just have ¡­stopped.) ¡°If we die in game, we¡¯re going to really die?¡± Laurel plopped down onto the grass. Shit. Those three idiots who were running around naked really died for a video stunt. ¡°We need to tell people!¡± Laurel jumped to her feet, looking frantic. (NO. You don¡¯t. How are you going to explain how you know this information? If you bring any part of what we¡¯re doing into public knowledge, the company will pull your plug for secrecy.) ¡°Holy shit, did you just threaten our lives, Chen?¡± I asked, shocked. (It wouldn¡¯t be me, Jose. I have people above me too, you know. And if they think the situation has gone sideways, they might send someone for me as well.) I sat, unable to comprehend the gravity of our situation. We were, for all intents and purposes, really in a foreign world that is full of monsters that want to kill us, with the bonus of potentially being the targets of other players who want an easy kill. And that was not good news. Our campsite had gone completely quiet, save for the sound of the crackling fire. I sat there, staring at the fire long after it had died into the wee hours of the morning. Suddenly my body refused to move, in fact, it was almost as if time had stopped. I couldn¡¯t even move my eyes, yet I remained conscious through some indeterminate amount of time. Then a pop-up window appeared in front of my eyes.
System update in progress. Please be patient while the update loads¡­
Chapter six An eternity later, I regained control of my body. The others were sleeping, so I guess they didn¡¯t notice. ¡°Maybe they fixed the logout issue!¡± I opened the menu, and to my great disappointment, saw that not only was the logout button still missing, the UI had been not-so-subtly changed, it now only had the basic character sheet that I was used to, and the inventory system. Much to my surprise, they had reduced the number of inventory slots down to just one that sat in the corner of the character sheet. The goods I had been storing in it up to that point spilled to the ground around me. Luckily, when we had geared up in town, we had the foresight to buy some large leather rucksacks for increased carrying capacity. Cursing, I began to gather up the gear that had spilled around me in a circle. Having managed to just barely pack my things away, a wave of tiredness overtook my body. I guess I had pushed myself too much. I nudged Nathan with my toe, rolling him onto his back. ¡°Wha?¡± he asked blearily. ¡°Your watch.¡± I said, yawning. He sat up with surprising speed and rubbed his eyes, ¡°On it.¡± We high fived, and I laid down in his bedroll. A few winks would clear my mind. *** The smell of bacon roused me from my slumber. Laurels¡¯ silhouette in front of the fire made me smile. ¡°Who decided bacon was important to bring? That person deserves a raise,¡± I stretched lazily and took a place beside Laurel, who kissed my cheek and continued frying the pork she had shaved from the ham she had purchased the day before. ¡°You know that was me.¡± ¡°You get a raise." She swayed and bumped me with her hip as she cooked. ¡°Find me coffee and we¡¯ll be even,¡± she grinned.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it. ¡°Say, where did Nate go?" I asked, finally noticing that he was nowhere to be seen. ¡°Ah,¡± She replied, ¡°He said he was going to scout the area out before we took off for the day.¡± ¡°Good man. Say, did you notice the update?¡± I asked as I shook the sand out of my boots before sliding them on. ¡°Now that you mention it, I did have kind of an issue with my inventory,¡± she replied. ¡°Yeah, I was awake for the update. It was super weird. Did you notice anything different other than the inventory thing?¡± ¡°Now that you mention it, things seem a bit more.¡± ¡°A bit more what?¡± I asked. ¡°More everything! Just generally more intense. Just wait till you taste this!¡± She turned and offered me a wooden plate of. Bacon and fried potatoes. I accepted the food gratefully, and sat. The bacon looked amazing. Perfectly cooked, somewhat caramelized, and the potatoes a beautiful brown, dripping with the bacon grease they were cooked in. I glanced at Laurel who looked on with an expectant grin and nodded. I took a bite of bacon and groaned in pleasure. ¡°That is amaz-za-zing.¡± I rolled my eyes as I savored the flavor and textures that exploded in my mouth. ¡°Try the potatoes.¡± She said, her smile even larger now. Glancing from her to the potatoes and back, I plucked one from its resting place and popped it into my mouth. Again, the flavor exploded in my mouth. ¡°I can tell they were cooked in bacon fat!¡± I was amazed. Previously, food would just taste like the food itself, without any crossover from the pan¡¯s previous foods. ¡°Pretty cool, right?¡± ¡°You damned right. I wonder what else was changed. Kinda wish there were patch notes.¡± I quickly began devouring the bacon and potatoes. A few minutes later, Nate came busting out of the brush with a wild look in his eyes. ¡°Guys! You¡¯re never gonna guess what¡¯s going on with the goblins, they¡¯re on the move! ¡°A warband?¡± I asked, shocked. ¡°The goblins?¡± Laurel stated, her eyes squinting in confusion. ¡°Naw. They¡¯re literally moving. All of them as far as I can tell. They¡¯ve packed up and are coming this way. They¡¯ll be here in an hour at most.¡± ¡°Well, it¡¯s a good thing they didn¡¯t see you,¡± Laurel said, passing a plate to him. ¡°Well. You see¡­ They totally saw me. The update must have changed the way stealth works." ¡°At least you made it out alive,¡± I said as I tried to dislodge a bit of bacon from my teeth with a fingernail. ¡°About that¡­,¡± He began. I raised an eyebrow. ¡°They don¡¯t seem to be violent. In fact, one of the sub-chieftains took the trouble to warn me about a big wandering monster nearby,¡± he continued as he started demolishing his bacon, ¡°Wow this is good stuff!¡± Laurel tittered and returned to her cooking. ¡°How do you think this¡¯ll affect our guild quest?¡± I asked Nathan. He shrugged his shoulders and continued wolfing down his food, ¡°No idea man. But these guys seem pretty non-violent. I¡¯m not about killing innocent people.¡± ¡°I feel ya, bud. We¡¯ll wait till they arrive and have a talk with them. Hopefully we can keep this peaceful. I don¡¯t wanna die today,¡± Nathan shivered, ¡°No joke.¡± Chapter seven Thanks to Nathan¡¯s warning, Laurel and I had prepared ourselves for visitors. We had packed our things and had them hidden nearby so that we could snag them on the way out if they had to flee. This would, after all, be our first contact with demi-humans. Nathan sprang to his feet his sharp ears alerting him to the approaching villagers ¡°They¡¯re here! I¡¯ll go ahead. Play it cool, guys.¡± He dashed into the forest to meet them and passed out of sight. Laurel squeezed my forearm and whispered, ¡°This is so exciting!¡± ¡°Honey,¡± I enquired, ¡°Have you chosen a combat magic spell yet?¡± Laurel shook her head, bouncing her springy ginger locks. ¡°No, but I am considering water elemental spells.¡± I nodded. ¡°Any particular reason?¡± She pulled Ringo from somewhere in her robe and held him up. ¡°I wanted to be able to keep this guy hydrated. Ah, but Water magic is pretty handy too! You get some healing magic, anti-debuff spells a basic ranged attack, you know, the normal. But if I specialize in it, I can move up to Ice magic, and with that, I get cold damage, and if I shape the ice right, I can apply piercing, slashing and blunt damage flavors.¡± I was astonished. I had no idea she had put so much thought into it. I suppose I oughtn¡¯t be so surprised, she had an advanced degree in math, and while she wasn¡¯t a full-time gamer like Nate and myself, she really applied herself in everything she did. Nathan returned, walking beside a green-skinned man whose main characteristics seemed to be knobby knees, elbows, and pointy ears, dressed in shabby clothes, but despite this, managed to radiate charisma and leadership in his every move. ¡°Hey, guys!¡± Nathan shouted, waving. ¡°This is the Chief.¡± I waved back to them and smiled. Nathan spoke to the Goblin chief in short bursts of a guttural language. The chief grinned, nodding. ¡°Nate, did you learn goblin?¡± He grinned as they finally reached the campsite, ¡°Yeah. It¡¯s kind of like Klingon.¡± The chief said something directed at me and looked on expectantly but realized that only Nathan could communicate with him. He half-turned and motioned towards the group of goblins that had been following them. One goblin, a thin female, wielding a staff that had been decorated with feathers and painted with bright paint in concentric circles, ran to his side, nearly tripping over her staff as she did so. Panting, she said something in her language and raised her staff. Laurel perked up and casually began putting me in between them with a step backward and to the left. But the Goblins didn¡¯t seem to notice, as the staff glowed briefly, and a halo of glittery gold sparkles fell over the Goblin chief¡¯s head. ¡°Much better,¡± He said, nodding. ¡°Thank you, Trixa.¡± The other goblin blushed a deeper shade of green, and shuffled her feet, as she looked away. She mumbled something incomprehensible and ran back to the crowd that was filling the campsite. ¡°That¡¯s adorable,¡± Laurel whispered as the girl fled to the safety of her companions. I grinned. Yeah, it was utterly adorable. That chief is setting up flags. ¡°So,¡± I began, ¡°Why are you guys moving your village?¡± The chief nodded, his golden earrings glittered as they swayed. ¡°It happened last night,¡± he leaned in and whispered confidentially, ¡°our traditional home became too uninhabitable for us. We couldn¡¯t stand it anymore, so we¡¯ve decided that it¡¯s time to rejoin the other people.¡± ¡°Uninhabitable?¡± I asked. ¡°I¡¯m not sure about it myself, it has always been like it is, but¡­¡± He looked into the middle distance and sighed. ¡°But¡­¡± I prompted A system message popped up:You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.
Congratulations! The Goblin chieftain, Ragweed likes you! (15/200) Your conversation skill has risen! (3/200)
The chieftain took a step back and gaped at the floating system message. ¡°The gods have spoken to you!¡± ¡°Wait, you can see that?¡± I swiped the popup away. ¡°Yes! You must be very holy! Will you join us? We are headed to Crowton.¡± Laurel leaned in and whispered, ¡°That¡¯s where the guild is.¡± I held out a hand, which was quickly taken and squeezed tight. ¡°Of course we¡¯ll accompany you.¡±
You have gained the title ¡°Friend of the Goblins¡± You will be looked upon well by other goblinoid species. You have gained the title ¡°Diplomat¡± Your charisma related skills will gain an additional 20% experience.
*** As we traveled back to the city, we found that the goblins were a lot smarter than we had expected. In fact, despite their shabby outerwear, their weapons were cunningly crafted, and they had a significant set of skills involving alchemy and gathering, which Laurel took great advantage of. We finally broke out of the forest and out onto the wide fields of wheat that surrounded the town. The goblins began setting up large tents along the tree line while the chief and the small shaman girl, Trixa followed us to the gates. ¡°Halt!¡± Guard A shouted, ¡°What¡¯s the meaning of this?¡± he was echoed by Guard B, who sounded somewhat less confident about the matter than Guard A. I smiled, making sure to show all of my teeth, ¡°I completed the goblin subjugation quest. I¡¯m here to turn it in.¡± Chief Ragweed winked at me, ¡°Yes. We¡¯ll talk with the lord of the city after he turns it in to his guild. During the two-day walk back to town, (What was a day-and-half trip became two because of the number of people involved.) The chief and I had come to the agreement that the city would be a bit more understanding of the sight of a few hundred Goblins if he (the Chief) would come in alone with my party to negotiate the terms of assimilation. I had wondered how the update had affected the game and was pretty sure that the AI had a major upgrade. I was having trouble imagining these Goblins as anything less than actual people. I mean, they certainly had feelings, I guess. So, what makes the emotions a meat person any less legitimate than the emotions of an electron person? As we made our way to the guild, a voice rang out, ¡°Lookie what we have here boys! Some goblins in our pretty town.¡± Four figures emerged from the shadows of a nearby alley. The leader was clearly a player, as he pulled out a weapon from his inventory screen. His clothes were a mishmash of various styles, and his eyes were those that Jose knew intimately; the eyes of a bully with a bit of power. The others who emerged with him had the same look in their eyes. ¡°And here I thought I¡¯d have to go into the forest to kill some greenskins,¡± One of the thugs said with a dangerous look in his squinty eyes. ¡°Gentlemen, These goblins are a quest turn-in. We¡¯d appreciate it if you¡¯d move on before there¡¯s any trouble. The leader looked surprised, ¡°What are you going to do about it?¡± He thumbed the edge of his sword, checking its sharpness. ¡°No, really. I want to know. Tell you what. We¡¯re going to kill these greenies, and then we¡¯re gonna take that sexy woman of yours for a good time. Let her know what a real man feels like.¡± He looked at his companions who chuckled at his wit. ¡°What you think boys? A pretty thing like that deserves to be treated real good, right?¡± He sneered. The group closed in on them, trying to encircle us. ¡°I don¡¯t know, I¡¯m curious to see how that little greenie performs,¡± A third one said, eyeing Trixa. The rest of them laughed loudly. Man, I don¡¯t need this. I messaged to the group. ¡°Already on it. I¡¯m gonna shut the mouth up. You guys focus on the thuglettes. Nathan messaged. I glanced around and noted that Nathan had somehow slipped away from the group unseen and was for sure stealthing his way up to the leader¡¯s back. I glanced to Laurel who nodded at me and put away Ringo, who she had been cuddling. I¡¯m sure these assholes think it¡¯s just a game, and a little PK is normal. I sent. (And you¡¯re not going to say a damned thing to them about it. Take out the trash, guys. They¡¯re not going to show any mercy, so you shouldn¡¯t either.) Dammit, Chen, I know, but I don¡¯t have to like it. I replied Suddenly, Laurel raised a hand and loosed a water ball at one of the thugs who had been eyeing her. He took the hit on the shoulder and spun to the ground, howling in pain. ¡°Holy shit, that hurt! Something¡¯s wrong.¡± He said, struggling to his feet. ¡°Get that bitch!¡± The leader shouted, pointing his sword at her. On his command, the others turned towards Laurel. And started advancing. The leader of this gang of rapey PKers took a stone from a pouch on his belt and stroked it along his blade. The blade¡¯s edge twinkled slightly in the light. Just as he was satisfied with the sharpening, Nathan¡¯s arm reached around his neck and pulled him backward, so he could stab him in-between his ribs. A gurgling sound escaped as blood-flecked foam escaped his lips and he fell to the cobblestone street, still. A second water ball hissed past me and bowled over another thug, who could only pathetically squeak in pain. This caused their morale to break, and they fell over each other to get away. With shouts of ¡°You¡¯ll regret this!¡± ¡°How clich¨¦. You only ever hear that is in old Korean dramas.¡± Laurel smirked as she watched them flee. Chief Ragweed waved to the thugs as they beat feet, then turned to me and asked, ¡°You sure you should let them go? They¡¯ll come back around to bite you eventually. I grimaced, then nodded. ¡°They don¡¯t know that they can really die now.¡± He cocked his head and squinted at me, ¡°I don¡¯t follow.¡± ¡°Ah, you see, they¡¯re like us. The gods speak to them.¡± ¡°Must be evil gods.¡± I nodded. ¡°You might be right.¡± Chapter eight I saw eyes peering at us from all around, and was suddenly all-too-aware that we had just killed someone. Someone who was now laying in the middle of the street, "Uh, guys. Let''s get a move on before we get some unwanted attention." Laurel tugged on my sleeve and pointed in the guild''s direction. I nodded. the gazes from the doorways and windows didn''t particularly look upset, but eventually, the town guards would show up, and it would behoove us to not be present. "Yeah," I nudged Nate, who looked a bit shaken now that the excitement had ended. He squatted down and quickly frisked the body down, palming what valuables he found into his pouches, undid the man''s belt, claiming the sword and sheath and with a farewell kick to the head, he strode off towards the guild with the rest of us following closely behind. *** Ragweed stood in the main room of the guild, taking it all in. He tugged on one of his long green ears and looked at me, "Is this place always like this?'' I had to say no, it was not, as the once efficient and peaceful guild office was now a chaotic frenzy. One lone woman with short wavy auburn hair that was held back with a hairband in her late teens, stood behind the counter, weathering the irate shouts from the adventurers that no longer waited peacably in line for their turn. Sighing, I gestured to everyone that they should wait here, and closed in on the crowd at the counter. To my surprise, I realized that the woman wasn''t wearing the guild uniform. I leaned over the counter a bit and saw that on the floor, lay the guild employees who I had seen on our previous visit, as still as marionettes with their strings cut, but with no obvious wounds. The woman looked at me and shook her head. "I didn''t do this! I just came in the back entry to deliver breakfast, and everyone was like this. Then those guys..." She glanced at the adventurers who were clamoring for her attention. I nodded. "I got this." I leaned towards her and scooped her up under her armpits, and hoisted her up and over the counter. I then sat her on the ground in front of me and hooked her chin with a finger to bring her eyes towards mine, She blushed furiously as her eyes met mine. "What''s your name?" "Ah," her voice tremored "Beatrice." "OK, Beatrice, go to my friends there, and we''re going to go to the lord''s manor. I''ll take care of these schmucks." She nodded quickly, avoiding my eyes again, and joined Laurel and the others. "OK, you knuckleheads. Stop harassing the woman. She doesn''t work here. If you bothered to look, the employees seem to be down there." I pointed to the floor behind the counter. (Laurel, ask her about her job and hobbies.)Enjoying the story? Show your support by reading it on the official site. Uh, ok. Why? (Because I can read her code. It would be weird if you knew without asking, right?) Right. I tried to ignore the chatter between our handler and Laurel, and focused on the crowd that was becoming more and more unruly as time passed. *** Once I had gotten the mob at least partially calmed down, we headed back outside. The corpse of our assailant had been loaded into a cart and was being pushed away by a person wearing a black robe. From my vantage, I could not manage to get a good look at him. Just as well, I supposed. I wanted to be done with that whole thing. After asking around, we had learned the location of the Lord''s manor, and casually made our way there. As we walked I snickered as I heard Beatrice whisper to Laurel, "What''s a schmuck?" *** SIX MONTHS AGO Laurel was away at her physical therapist for her weekly session, so Nathan had decided to grace me with his presence. (and pizza) We sat there in my condo, which overlooked Portland enjoying the pizza. The large bay window that offered that spectacular view of the Willamette river had opaqued, and become the backdrop for the holotank. As we watched a comedy panel show, the lights dimmed the standard 15% as a commercial came on: The tank was filled with an overhead drone shot that sailed over vast mountains and forests. Suddenly a red dragon burst from the trees, its roar shook the room, with just enough subsonic vibration to instill a touch of fear. The POV swing around dizzyingly, and two heavily armored griffins were closing in on the dragon, who seemingly, had not noticed them yet. The griffins dived, their bodies protected from view by the sunlight that streamed golden from behind them. As they slowly crept through the shot, hurtling towards their target, The armored figures that rode the feathered and muscled incarnations of wrath into combat could be seen, One was myself, and the other was Nathan, digitally added by the holotank. The scene cut back and forth from the dragon, to the griffin riders until the moment where the lances would strike, building tension. Then a deep throb of bass shook the room as the scene faded to black
INIFNITA THE WORLD''S FIRST COMPLETE DEEP DIVE VRMMO YOUR NEW LIFE AWAITS
Both of us leaped to our feet and glanced at each other before shouting "NERD BONAR!" To the heavens. "Oh my god, Joe. Do you know what this means? A deep dive game? and a VRMMO to boot?" I nodded in excitement, The technology for VRMMO''s had been available for a few years now, but a deep dive? That was a horse of a whole other flavor. I wonder how they''ll pull it off? "It means we''re going to be famous!" "You god-damned right it does! The invincible duo will get in there and make the most viral of videos, and find the tastiest of treasures to sell for the sickest amounts!" Nathan danced around in glee. "Dolla dolla bill, y''all," I took his arm and danced with him. "Wait," Nathan paused. "How are we going to get into the opening event? If we don''t get in on that, some other caster like Dorkshire will claim all the early viewers. I frowned. "They''d have to have some sort of contest or something right?" I replied. "That''s like winning the lottery, we need a surefire solution." "You have a point..." *** The six of us arrived at the ornate gates of the Lord''s manor, and to absolutely no-one''s surprise, were confronted by four well-armed and armored guards. "Halt! Identify yourselves, and state your reason for your visit." The first guard, clearly the leader, as he held more decorative pips on his brightly polished steel gorget, drew his sword and leveled it at me. Chapter nine Staring at the point of the broadsword that was pointing at me, I gently reached out and pushed the sword to the side. "That won''t be neccisary. We''re here for two reasons. One, There''s been some sort of ..thing at the Adventurers guild. They really need some guards there. Like, right now." The captain squinted his eyes at me and pursed his lips for a moment beforee looking at one of his guards, and gestured with his head, spurring two of them into action. They picked up shields that were leaned against the guard shack by the gate and headed in the direction of the plaza. "And the second thing?" He said, sheathing his sword and crossing his arms. I stepped to the side and gestured at Ragweed and Trixa, who stood proudly and nodded to the Captain. "I completed the goblin subjugation quest. They now want to be citizens." He blinked twice and looked at the goblins, then back to me. "Just these two?" "...A bit more." "How many more?" The captain scratched his salt-and-pepper beard thoughtfully.The author''s content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. "Uh," I said brightly, "...all of them." Ragweed nodded, "The entire village. Our shamans had a vision telling us to reunite with the people." I cleared my throat, "Yeah, so they''re all here. In the fields outside the city, making camp." The captain looked alarmed, so I raised my hands to calm him. "No, no. It''s not like that. Ragweed here," I gestured to the Goblin chief, "is their leader. He''s here to reassure you that they''re peaceful. He''s your hostage until the rest of his tribe can integrate with the city." Suddenly a thought sprang to mind. "Oh shit! We need to get back to the goblins! The players might start attacking them." "Spaz! You and Nate get out there now! I''ll help the captain prepare." Laurel hiked up her robe and sped off, but was quickly outrun by Nathan. As the two of them left, I turned to the Captain of the guard, "Can you please send some guards out there to protect the goblins?" I asked. The captain of the guard frowned, "Son, that''s the strangest thing I''ve ever heard a man say to me." I balled my fists in frustration, "C''mon man. These are new tax-paying citizes out there, we need to protect them!" A light lit within his eyes, and he grinned. "We have to help them!" He turned to the rest of his guards and pointed to a chubby faced guard, who clearly seemed to be on the low end of the totem pole. "You, gather ten guards and get out there, now!" The guard threw a salute, shouted "Yes sir!" and passed through the footgate in the main gate. The Captain turned towards Ragweed and smiled, "Let''s go meet Lord Bauhaus." Ragweed nodded and rested his hand on Trixa''s shoulder, "Let''s" I shook the Captain of the guard''s hand, "I''ll return to collect the quest reward later, I have to catch up with my friends." "Good day!" The Captain called out to me as I left and led the two goblins through the gate, and towards the mansion. *** Chapter ten I ran after the guys, pushing myself to the limit. I just barely saw the springy ginger hair of Laurel ahead of me in the distance. A popup obscured my vision momentarily
Congratulations! You''ve gained the Running skill! (001/200)
I swiped it out of the way, and almost fell over a merchant''s cart that rolled into my path. I dove over it and rolled, tumbling back to my feet, not stopping. A second popup activated
Congratulations! You''ve gained the Acrobatics skill! (005/200)
GODDAMMIT! These popups are gonna kill me! I swiped the second one away, and managed to avoid any mishaps, and sped through the main gate. and streaked down the road towards the goblin encampment. It seemed that a few players had discovered the goblins already, Nathan and Laurel had managed to place themselves between them. A large man wielding a war club, who was clearly a professional sportsball player of some sort in the past looked down at Laurel (which was a feat in of itself, as she was right around six feet tall!) "Hey lady, those goblins are here in the newbie zone. They''re fair game." Laurel looked worried, "No, we brought them here for a quest! They''re moving into the city!" The tall man tapped his club against his shoulder in frustration. "Look, lady, first of all, that''s the lamest excuse I''ve ever heard. Secondly, who ever heard of a quest like that? Especially at low level? I don''t believe in PK, so unless you move that admittedly fine ass of yours, I''m going to smack you down on the way to those green stacks of experience behind you." I arrived, chugging along, my stamina nearly completely drained and took a place beside Laurel and Nathan, who had drawn a dagger but held it out of sight, behind his back. I rested my hands on my knees and panted.The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation. "She, -woof!- She''s telling the truth, Look behind you, some guards are coming to keep the peace." The large man craned his head around and saw eleven guards charging this way, their chain armor jingling as the rings bounced against each other. "Dammit," he whispered under his breath, He looked back at Laurel, "Where did you get the quest?" "The guild," She replied, obviouslyrelieved that the unnamed man wasn''t willing to start a fight with thetown guard hoofing it this way. "Tsk," He muttered, "That place is a madhouse, I''m not about to go there right now." I fell on my rump, exhausted. from the exertion. I stared at Laurel and Nathan. They didn''t seem at all phased by the running. "Say," I began, "Did you guys skill up from the run here?" "What? No. Why would we?" Nathan asked, sheathing his weapon as the trouble wandered away, annoyed. "Because I did. several times. I even got new skills, Acrobatics and running." "Woo! How''d that happen?" Nathan asked as Laurel headed towards the approaching guards. "I had to do a running dive over a merchant''s cart. I landed on my feet and kept running." I flopped back on the grass, " I was really pushing it too. (Mister Garcia. I''m pretty sure that''s because of your indomitable talent.) "Yeah?" I sat up after a moment, "You have any details?" (Well your character was pinging the network pretty hard when you went all-out, Especially when you got that new skill. I''ll analyze the data and get back with you.) Nathan held an arm out for me, which I took and pulled myself to my feet with his assitance. "Thanks, bud. I''m glad we got here in time." A popup opened in front of each of us:
Congratulations! You have cleared the quest GOBLIN SUBJUGATION Quest parameters have changed, adjusting reward... You have leveled up! You have leveled up! Please receive your Quest reward from Lord Bauhaus
Nice! The Lord must have spoken with Ragweed and accepted the offer. "Hot damn! Two levels! Whoever saw that kind of reward from a rank f quest?" Nathan crowed." "Spaz!" I shouted, "We gotta go back to the Lord''s place." "Sec!" she replied, speaking to the guards that had now gathered in front of her. She gestured to the temporary encampment that the goblins had begun setting up. As she finished, she waved to the guards who headed to speak with the goblin villagers. She trotted back to us and hung her arms around my neck. "Sup, you level three badass, goin my way?" She waggled her eyebrows at me suggestively. I kissed her. I found that many of her statements usually end on in a kiss. Not complaining. Nope. "Lets go turn in this quest, you lovebirds." Nate nudged me and headed back to the gate. Laurel stuck her tongue out at him, "Spoilsport." Chapter eleven Chapter 11 We managed to skirt the hullabaloo that had sprung up around the guild and made our way back to Lord Bauhaus¡¯s manor. ¡°What do you suppose the reward is?¡± Nathan said, frowning. ¡°I reckon a bit of money, this is just a rank F quest, after all,¡± I replied, as the sturdy gates came into view. ¡°I dunno,¡± Laurel started, ¡°It said the parameters changed, and I really feel like it suddenly got more¡­¡± ¡°more?¡± Nate interjected. ¡°¡­Just more! You know, this seems more impactful to the overall storyline than a simple ¡®kill x baddies¡¯ quest.¡± He nodded. ¡°You¡¯re not wrong.I think we may have just gotten I good with the lord.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s rarely a bad thing¡± I reached out and took her hand, giving it a squeeze. ¡°And here we are, ladies and gentlemen,¡± Nathan said, waving to the guard who was posted at the gate. The guard snapped to attention, ¡°Lord Bauhaus is expecting you,¡± He opened the gate and ushered us inside. A butler met us at the front door, and quickly buttled us inside. (is that even a word?) As we were quickly and efficiently guided though the opulent and richly decorated hallways, we found ourselves in a study filled with leather-bound tomes and racks of scrolls. Behind a large, beautifully carved desk, sat Lord Bauhaus and Chief Ragweed, who had pulled up a chair beside him. They were staring at a map on the desk, which upon further inspection, proved to be a map of the province.Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences. Lord Bauhaus stood and smiled, ¡°Welcome to my manor. I suppose you¡¯re here to claim your reward?¡± ¡°Were it not for the need of common adventurers such as ourselves, we would just do it out of loyalty for the state,¡± Laurel uttered with a slight curtsey. Lord Bauhaus smiled and waved dismissively, ¡°No-one should ever work without gain.¡± I quickly accepted the hand that the lord extended, and gave it a solid pump, ¡°We gratefully accept your generosity.¡± ¡°Nonsense, you earned every bit of this,¡± He withdrew a bulging pouch of coins and let it drop to the desk with a satisfying clink. He also pulled a small sheaf of wrapped documents from his desk and handed it to me, ¡°Since the guild is, ah, indisposed for the time being, I¡¯d like to offer you this as well, considering the aplomb you showed when completing the request, as well as the ingenuity to bring these new citizens to me, He smiled at the Chieftain who winked at me cheekily and took a sip of tea. ¡°Well Gentlemen, --and lady, We need to discus how we can enhance the infrastructure of the town to accommodate everyone¡­¡± ¡°Ah! This is my stage!¡± Nathan perked up. ¡°Beg pardon?¡± The lord asked with anintrigued look. ¡°Oh! I¡¯m a civil engineer. It¡¯s my specialty.¡± Chieftain Ragweed¡¯s eyes opened wide, ¡°I¡¯m an engineer too! What a coincidence!¡± It was my turn to be surprised, as I had not a single clue that the Goblins were at all technically inclined. In fact, I had assumed that they were rather primitive, based on their clothing. I guess I didn¡¯t look too close at the things the villagers had brought along with them. ¡°OK Nate, why don¡¯t you hang around and help these guys. The two of us will go back to that Inn with the bird on the sign we saw on the way here,¡± I bowed respectfully, and left, with Laurel in tow. Nathan nodded, "I got this, guys. See you tonight." As we closed the door behind us, leaving Nate to flex his brain at the situation, Laurel whispered, ¡°What was the paperwork?¡± I had been wondering that myself, so I untied the string that held it together, and gasped. The paperwork had tuned out to be nothing less than¡­ Chapter twelve ¡°Is that a¡­¡± Laurel said, peering at the sheaf of papers. ¡°¡­A deed,¡± I said, flipping through the pages. ¡°A deed!¡± Laurel squealed, ¡°A deed to what?¡± ¡°A house.¡± ¡°Come on, let¡¯s go look at it!¡± Laurel grabbed my arm, bouncing in excitement. ¡°Calm down, spaz. It isn¡¯t going anywhere. We can wait for Nate to get back from his meeting.¡± ¡°Aww,¡± she whined at me. ¡°But we can go to the inn and have some food and drink, how does that sound?¡± I said, playing on her weakness of a nice bottle of wine. ¡°Muu. OK. Let¡¯s go,¡± She flounced away cutely, headed back to the central plaza. *** Three bottles in, Laurel was quite drunk. I was amazed at the accuracy of the buzz that the alcohol had given me. Clearly Laurel approved. She eyed the remains of the roast that sat before us. She took the knife that lay beside it and carved off a large piece and began gnawing on it with a contented look on her face. Laurel¡¯s jaw dropped as a look of realization took hold.Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere. ¡°We need desserts! Lots of them!¡± ¡°OK, babe. We¡¯ll order some,¡± I snagged the meat she had been working on from her now greasy hand. ¡°You don¡¯t get it! This is a game. I can¡¯t get fat!¡± ¡°OK OK!¡± Relax! ¡°Cake! NOW!¡± She staggered to her feet, and cast her eyes around the room. The eyes of the other patrons cast disgusted looks at Laurel who was quickly becoming a nuisance. I stood, and pulled her back to her seat, where she struggled weakly to stand again. ¡°Excuse me ma¡¯am, Can we get some cake and pie here?¡± I waved at the waitress who had been leaning out of the kitchen, watching the situation develop. She ducked back into the kitchen and returned shortly with a platter of desserts. Laurel¡¯s eyes lit with hungry lust, and shoved a handful of cake into her mouth. As she devoured the confection, tears began flowing down into the cake she was shoveling into her mouth. ¡°Mnnmnnn mnnnmm mnnnm¡± She said around the mouthful (and then some) of cake. I took a napkin and began wiping her face clean of the meal she had been overindulging in. ¡°It¡¯s so damned good,¡± She said reaching for the pie with one hand, and grabbing a fork with the other. I was a bit shocked. I knew she got a little rowdy (and more than a little horny) after a bit of wine, but was shocked at this depraved woman, ravenously consuming cake, pie and anything else that caught her eye. ¡°What¡¯s got you in a frenzy, Spaz?¡± I asked ¡°I can¡¯t get fat! This is a game! For so long, I¡¯ve had to restrain myself. Finally I can let go.¡± She slurred as she leaned back against the chair and sniffed loudly, rubbing the back of her hand against her nose. ¡°Woo! How long has that been bottled up?¡± I leaned in and kissed her tears away, the saltiness mixed with the sweetness of the frosting that had recently covered her face. She laughed, and pulled me in for a proper kiss. Her tongue hungry for mine. ¡°Too long.¡± Chapter thirteen Six years ago. The lights were pouring down hell-like heat, causing Laurel to sweat profusely in the dress she had just been sewn into, a lovely deep-blue taffeta number with embedded micro-holoprojectors that caused a swirl of galaxies to hover just over the material and swirl whenever she took a step. She thought that this time it was something people would actually wear, and that was nice. Often, she was used as a canvas for ...underwhelming designers that got a lucky break early on. She stood in the queue, two back, a full head taller than the others, her alabaster skin, sprinkled with a few freckles was magnified by her wild spray of ginger locks, pulled into a forty five degree angled ponytail which made it look like a curly ginger rooster''s tail, caused her to stand out from the rest. As she patiently waited her turn, she scanned the audience. She knew it was bad form to acknowledge them, as it was standard operating procedure to do your catwalk, throw a few poses at the end, and make your way back so the next could do thiers, all the while oblivious to the people around you. The disconnect helped you focus. She knew that. However, she looked around, and saw a few sets of lustful eyes that were focused intensely on her. This, not unsurprisingly, turned her on, and the familiar tingles made her smile slightly as her nipples rose in response. She had, much to her disappointment, a huge void in her love life. Her job kept her extremely busy, and because of that, she remained single. She would be going solo tonight, as usual. What Laurel didn''t know, was that she was the target of hate from (to put kindly) a few spiteful bitches. They saw the attention she got from the men, and it infuriated them. After a long string of awards and easily won contests, They snapped. Today they would teach her a harsh lesson on life. A figure in black wearing a holographic mask of an Oni, stepped out from behind a curtain, wielding a club.'' Unseen by the audience, and unnoticed by most of the models, the armed figure rushed up behind Laurel and struck her on the head with his club. Stunned, her eyes rolled, and she staggered forward, somehow managing to stay standing, as blood flowed into her eyes. The second blow knocked her to the ground with a scream of pain as she culred up in the fetal position. The audience erupted into chaos, people were donning thier castgoggles to call for help, while others donned them to record the assault, and yet others fled the scene. A third blow stopped Laurel''s feeble attempts to stand. Oddly, she remained concious througout it all. She lay there twitching, as the club smashed her skull sening bone fragments into her grey matter. As she lay there, unable to move, save for the uncontrolled spasming that was her brain desperately trying to move her body, she heard a voice asshe sank into blissful unconcious which said, "That''ll teach you to be so high and mighty." *** A few years of reconstructive surgeries and delicate brainwork, returned her to more-or-less the same state as she was before the assault, except or one thing. She had no fine motor control. She would quake and spasm whenever she saw movement or heard anything above a certain level of loudness. This left her alone in her apartment, where the solitude would let her have a halfway normal life. A few months later, she had received a call from her doctor''s nurse. In this call, she was informed that there was an option that would resolve her lingering damage. A very illegal option, but an option nonetheless. It took all of three seconds for her to make the descision. One week later Laurel''s wheelchair dutifully guided her through the winding streets of Shanghai, down dark alleyways. Her castgoggles projected her path ahead of her, and translated half-caught mutterings from the natives as she went further and further down that rabbit hole.This narrative has been purloined without the author''s approval. Report any appearances on Amazon. At the end of her journey, A security camera hung above a simple unmarked door, with not so much as a door handle thjat took up most of the wall that was the end of the narrow alley that she had traversed to get there. A few moments later, it opened and a young chinese man smiled at her. "Miss Pendegrass. I''m pleased to finally meet you. Come on in." Laurel studied the man briefly. His face was a cool emotionless mask, he could be considered handsome, given the proper outfitting. As it was, he was wearing immaculately clean and pressed green surgical scrubs. She paused a moment, but urged her wheelchair to take her inside. The doctor, who had never named himself, sat behind a simple desk with a small object the size andshape of a quails'' egg that was sitting on a small display pedestal made of lucite. This object was the reason she had taken a hop around the world. It was a nano egg, An artificial shell containing a black goo of nanomachines, which would diassemble the shell and use its material (and themselves) to construct the needed implant. The legality of this implant in Cascadia was most definately not in question. Following the Dallas Nano outbreak, which had devoured most of that small town in the west side of the Salem Megacomplex beore the nessicary amount of deactivating reagent could be brought into play, nanomachines had ben outright banned. Not only did this implant use nanomachines, it was also a live connection to the castnet. This was also highly illegal, since the terrorist group Outbreak managed to hack the livecast implants over the net, killing thousands of innocent people whose only crime was wanting to have the newest and shiniest technology, they too were banned. Luckily, after implantation, there would be no visible evidence of it, and the implant itself was composed of fabricated organic matter that could not be seen on normal scanner unless you knew what you were looking for. The implantation was the easy part. A simple insertion of the egg, and it would do the rest, even the healing of the wound. The process took less than an hour, thanks to the robotic surgeon that had performed the procedure with the utmost precision and speed. She was back on the hop to Seattle an hour later with the address of a physical thrapist that would help her train the implant that would eventually give her full, normal control of her body. It was a few years later, that the sessions had finally given Laurel a more-or-less normal life again. However, A model has a limited shelf-life, and her aggressors had grown in popularity since she had been forced out of her industry, she found that no-one would hire her. She had been blacklisted. Lucky for her, she had inherited a condo in the swanky section of Seattle, and had managed to save quite a lot of money from her modeling work, which was invested wisely. She would, barring an act of god, never need to worry about money. *** Three years ago Laurel entered the shop, and a little bell, --an acual, honest-to-goodness analog bell!-- rang, announcing her entry into the little game shop. Its walls were covered with cheap holo posters of Comic book covers and advertisements or games of various types. As she browsed through the aisles, she was pleasantly surprised to see not only a wide selection of board games, but modern AR games that would be played through CLARA, as well old-fashioned board games! This was apparently quite the niche shop. At the counter was a short, dark skinned man, with a thin, well groomed and shaped moustache, short line-beard and intelligent eyes and a cheeky smile that highlighted his well deined dimples. --clearly a latino of some derivation. He stopped for a moment and did a double take as he saw her. He was exactly her type, and her body started to react to him. With great effort, she managed to calm down, lest she lose control and have a seizure. She managed to clear herself of emotion. The clerk smiled widely, as Laurel approached the counter. "Excuse me," She began, somewhat nervous, "I''m interested in a game that can be played solo or with a group." The man perked up, "What kind of game? Fantasy? Sci-fi? Retro? AR?" Laurel paused, on the verge of panicking. This had been the first real outing in a few months, and her anxiety levels were soaring. She focused, glad that anxiety was not a trigger for her seizures. "Ah," she said brightly. The man, whose nametag she had finally managed to notice, read ''Jose'' leaped to the rescue, "Who is it for? You? Your kids?" "Ah," she managed to repeat herself, "I don''t have kids." "Well, do you like board games?" He pressed "Y-yes. Do you have a recommendation?" "Why yes I do! It just so happens that I''m receiving a few really rare games tomorrow that just happen to meet your requirements. Would you like to come in tomorrow afternoon and have a look at them?" Jose asked, his dimples in full effect. Laurel knew at that point that this man would be hers by hook or by crook. She just had to go slow, in case he might get scared off by her ...condition. Chapter fourteen It was well into the night when Nathan stumbled into the Inn. He scanned the crowd and finally spied us. ¡°Hey buddy! Over here!¡± I waved him towards our booth. Nathan grinned and slid in beside me. ¡°Wow, spaz. You look like you were buried under a mountain of cake crumbs.¡± Laurel mumbled something incredibly crude involving Nathan, his mother, a goat and a liter of lube. I was quite proud of her. Nate laughed in response and nodded. ¡°Yeah, she was a freak like that.¡± Laurel moaned, utterly stuffed. Her eyes had a half-comatose glaze. I pushed her shoulder, and she tilted, slowly going horizontal. ¡°She¡¯s got the cake sleepies,¡± I grinned She mumbled something and sighed loudly ¡°¡­And pie. And turkey. And roast.¡± She made a satisfied sound and closed her eyes, almost instantly asleep. ¡°Well, now that Miss Sunshine is out, how¡¯d your day go?¡± I asked. ¡°It was a bit more complicated than I thought it would be, but I set in motion a plan to upgrade the city significantly, while preventing ghettoization of the lower income areas.¡± I blinked. ¡°That seems pretty high level conversations for NPC¡¯s, Nate.¡± Nathan nodded and flagged the waitress down, calling for mead. ¡°You¡¯re 100% right. I swear it¡¯s like they were learning on the fly. By the time we were done, I¡¯m sure they were on my level.¡± My eyebrows shot up, ¡°That¡¯s pretty impressive.¡± ¡°I know, right?¡± Nate happily took the flagon from the waitress that approached and took a deep pull. He smiled. ¡°This is really good!¡± ¡°Slow down, champ. You¡¯ll really get drunk.¡± This time Nathan¡¯s eyebrows rose, half in surprise, half in curiosity. ¡°You don¡¯t say.¡± ¡°I do say. Get that down you, and we¡¯ll take some food to our new place.¡± I pointed my chin at the recumbent Laurel, ¡°Help me get her up.¡±You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version. Nathan drained his vessel and slammed it down with a loud ¡®Ah!¡¯ ¡°Yes boss.¡± Nathan nodded as he slipped food into his inventory surreptitiously. I managed to get Laurel on my back with the help of my dependable companion, Nathan, we trudged to the location of our new home. *** As wewalked through town, the golden lights of candles and lanterns escaped through windows, faintly illuminating the areas that filled the spaces between the street lamps which attracted halos of moths that battered at them with desperate, relentless passion. The cool evening breeze fluttered my clothing, cooling my alchohol-heated skin pleasantly. It was almost as if we were ack in the real world, returning from a pub crawl. Nathan stopped and cocked his head. "Wait. Hold up." Nathan hissed. Turning, I saw him cock his head, and squint in concentration. "What''s up? "Shh." He held his finger to his lips and listened carefully. After a few minutes, he faded from sight and whispered, "Be right back." Hmm. I wonder what could have gotten him spooked like that. I looked around and saw only a stray alleycat pad silently across the street, off on adventures of its own knowing. Laurel squirmed against me, her breath a warm contrast against the cool night air tickled nape of my neck. A few minutes later Nate reappeared, "Let''s get moving." I nodded, and bounced Laurel up to get a better purchase on her thighs, "What was it?" Nate walked beside me, pursing his lips, "Ah, probably nothing." "You sure?" "Well, I heard a conversation from inside one of the houses, It leveled up my perception, so I thought it might be important." "What was it then?" "A housewife was talking to her husband, who is apparently a city guard." They were talking about the goblins, then moved on to us." I paused, "Us?" "Well, not us specifically. Players." "Wait, what? NPC''s arent supposed to be able to recognize that we''re players." "It''s not that simple. They can see our menus and popups. And they noticed a distinct difference in behavior between NPC''s and players," Nathan said as we walked. "There''s more, right?" "Well the wife then relayed a story from one of the neighbors. Apparently a player barged in and started breaking all of her pottery, looking for coins." I laughed, "Really? A Zelda reference?" "Ah, yeah, but then she said something about players.... being cursed or insane or something. I think it might be best if we try to blend in with the locals." I nodded, "I agree. I had already found a setting in the HUD that lets me shut off notification popups. They almost killed me today! I''ll have spaz set it when she wakes up." "Good idea." We finally arrived at the location on the map, it was a fairly ordinary looking brownstone surrounded by a seven foot-tall stone wall which was secured by a wrought iron gate. Behind the gate an elderly man with a large curled moustache in a shabby looking waistcoat sat in a chair that sat in a meager looking shed, intended to keep the rain off of him. I kicked the gate lightly, "Open up. We''re home." The old man sprang to his feet, straightened his clothes to no real effect, and cleared his throat. "Ah you must be the new Master," He fumbled with a ring of keys the he produced from within his coat. "That''s us, and as you can see, the mistress of the house nees to lay down," I gestured to Laurel, who lay over my shoulders oblvious to her surroundings. The man crowed as he held up the key he had been looking for, which he inserted into the gate, which clanked loudly, allowing him to swing it open. "Welcome home, masters." Chapter fifteen Our new place was quite nice. it was a four floor brownstone with a full basement. I couldn''t even imagine how much the rent on such a place would be in Portland. Surely not less than a thousand Cass, which would be damn near three thousand US dollars a month. You know, this deep dive is starting to look more and more attractive to me. Nathan had claimed the third floor as his, which was fine as far as I was concerned. When Laurel and I arrived, I hauled her up to the second floor, and immediately passed out as soon as I found a bed to flop her onto. (Thank goodness she''s not terribly heavy, plus my STR stat definately helped in that regard.) The next morning, I woke to a light knocking on the bedroom door. "Sir?" My eyes slowly opened, and I looked over to see that I was alone. Laurel must have woekn early and gone exploring. The bedroom door opened, and a girl leaned in and peered at me. "Sir?" I looked at her, frowning for a moment, as I struggled to place her. Aha! I knew! I sent a PM to the party. Babe, who was that girl we rescued from the guild? Uhm... Laurel replied. Her name is Beatrice. Nathan interjected. Thanks. "Good morning, Beatrice. Do you mind if I ask what you''re doing here?" Beatrice opened the door further and entered, revealing a maids'' uniform. "My father and I were hired by the city Lord as staff. He''s the groundskeeper, and I''m in charge of Maidery." She curtsied and shook her head as she remembered something. "Oh! I''m here to tell you breakfast is ready. Come down when you''ve prepared." She curtsied again, clearly unused to it, and left, the door closing behind her. I nodded and took stock of my state. My clothes stank from the previous days excitement and I certainly didn''t help the matter. I was definately whiffy. I ran my left hand over my chin and felt a solid few days of stubble scratching back at it. Well, it couldn''t be helped. I''d clean up after breakfast. I wandered down the left hand side of the large stairs that followed the walls, like arms hugging the room reaching the ground floor, I followed the sound of the others to the dining room. Laurel and Nathan had squared off against each other, and were working on plates of thickly sliced, streaky bacon. The scent was heavenly.Stolen content alert: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences. "Hey guys, I see the breakfast of champions is on the menu." Both of them grunted in agreement and continued devouring their breakfast. "Beatrice, can I get some of that?" "Sorry, master. They have it all, the larder is low. I was going to buy some sundries this afternoon." I sighed, "Bring me whatever there is then. Just, ah. Not quite so much." That statement earned me glares from the others, but I ignored them and sat at the head of the table. "Did you two explore the house?" Laurel nodded enthusiastically and mumbled around a large slice of bacon as Beatrice returned with a plate of cheese, a heel of crusty bread and a small pot of butter. "Thank you, Beatrice." She blushed and retreated to the kitchen, her tray clutched to her chest. Nate elbowed me and snickered as he started working on his final piece of bacon. "I think she''s weak to attention from men." "Psht. Sure she''s cute, but I have the best here," I jerked my head towards Laurel who leaned in and gave me a greasy, bacon-flavored kiss. "You sweet talker," *** The three of us had left Beatrice with a pouch of money and a list of things that we''d like to keep around the house (clearly bacon was on the list) which she cheerfully accepted. While the place (I hesitate to call it a mansion, but it''s pretty nice) was nice, apparently some of the household items had been sold to pay the estate taxes. So there were quite a few empty rooms that needed to be redecorated. Nate had spent a few hours sketching out how he wanted to decorate his part of the house, and I shouldn''t have been surprised at how good his plans were, as he was a civil engineer back in the real world, so had a good sense of asthetics. As we entered the shopping district, Laurel brought to my attention that the NPC''s were acting strangely. Since Nathan''s discovery the previous night, we had agreed that shutting off pop-up notifications was for the best, and this, I thought, was exactly why. A group of three players were cruising through the marketplace, clearly looking for trouble. It was clear that they were players, because they had the mix-and-match equipment look that new players have when they find a decent drop but it does not match thier outfit. The group suddenly stopped and one of them pointed to another player, a young man, in his early twenties that had much the same piecemeal style who was inspecting the wares of a street vendor with care. Confident that we didn''t stand out from the crowd, because we had purchased our outfits from a merchant, which helped us blend in. Laurel elbowed me, as the group made a beeline towards the other player, who was oblivious to thier approach. "Oh shit, they''re going to PK him." Nathan said, glancing my way. "We gotta stop them. They don''t know that it''s real." Laurel said, storming off towards the lone player. I sighed heavily, she was right. We couldn''t just let a murder take place in front of us. I trotted over to the lone man andstood beside him, pretending to look at the wares as well. "Excuse me," I began. "Hi! Are you a player?" He replied. "Yes, but Im trying to warn you about a group of people approaching with weapons drawn. If you want to take off, my goup will block them." "What?" He started to glance back, but I grabbed his shoulder. "Don''t. I don''t want them to realize they''ve been spotted." He looked me in the eyes an nodded, "Thanks." He took a bottle of something from the display and handed the merchant few coins and turned to leave. I''m behind them.Nate messaged. Good man.I replied. I turned, and saw the group approach, then veer off to follow the young man. I took this moment to step in front of them. "Gentlemen. I think you need to reconsider what you''re about to do." This earned me their full attentions. "If you don''t want to play with us too, you better get out of the way." The lead man said, pointing his sword at me. I smiled and nodded, "There''s something you don''t know..." Chapter Sixteen The leader of the PK group looked at me like I was an idiot. ¡°Really, tough guy?¡± He said sarcastically, ¡°What would that be?¡± I grinned even wider and held up three fingers ¡°Well, for starters, you¡¯re surrounded.¡± I folded my index finger in, ¡°Secondly, This s a no PVP zone,¡± I folded in my ring finger and proudly showed him the remaining finger If you¡¯re feeling froggy, then jump. I¡¯ll be more than happy to smash you down In fact, I invite you to do so, because Smashing assholes is one of my favorite things.¡± Laurel giggled, and I cast a dirty glare her way, which made her laugh even harder. I¡¯m in position Good job, Nate. Think you can OHK him? Not sure, but he¡¯ll be under the stunned and bleeding debuff if I don¡¯t Think you can piss him off enough to initiate PK? I think he¡¯s too chickenshit to start it without a surprise attack. Laurel piped in. I winked at Laurel who grinned and nodded. I leaned towards the man and gave what I hoped was an intimidating glare. ¡°What¡¯s it going to be, chump? You lost your surprise advantage. Got the cajones to step up like a man?¡± I made a point to look at Laurel, who had fully focused her mana, and ready to cast, off behind the mouth, where I assumed Nate was stealtEnjoying the story? Show your support by reading it on the official site. hed, and at a few other places where the imaginary backup would be hiding. The mouth ¨CI decided that was his name from now on¡ªscowled and muttered something vulgar under his breath. ¡°Just you wait, Mr. Hero. You¡¯ll be outside the safe zone eventually. I¡¯ll get you then. That¡¯s a promise.¡± The Mouth turned and left, his two companions showed a solid mixture of intimidation and confusion, and after a moment of hesitation, quickly followed him out of sight. Oh thank Gygax, I thought I was gonna piss myself.. I sent with a distinct sigh of relief. Nathan laughed loudly, which caused him to fade into view. Laurel craned her head around, ¡°Did that guy beat feet?¡± I scanned the crowd as well, ¡°Yeah, don¡¯t blame him either.¡± Nate slapped me on the shoulder, and leered at me. ¡°My man! I didn¡¯t think you had that in you. Hell, I¡¯da run too.¡± I ruffled my hair and rubbed my eyes. ¡°Man, this whole situation has me stressed. It¡¯s like we¡¯re being forced to become killers.¡± Laurel wrapped her arms around my neck, gave me a firm kiss, and then rested her forehead against mine, our gazes locked. ¡°That¡¯s because you¡¯re a good, moral man. Which is also why I love you. So, we¡¯ll just keep our killing to monsters, right?¡± She said, nodding, which forced me to nod as well. ¡°Well, Spaz,¡± Nathan interjected, ¡°self-defense is a whole other thing.¡± Laurel straightened up and put her hands on her hips, ¡°I know. If someone fucks with my man,¡± She reached over and grabbed one of my buttocks roughly, ¡°I¡¯mma get brutal.¡± I grinned. ¡°Yeah, it¡¯s fair to say we¡¯d protect each other, but¡­¡± The two of them turned to caf¨¦ me directly. And simultaneously said ¡°Buuut?¡± ¡°¡­I have some feelings about some of the nonhuman NPC¡¯s. The Goblins, for example. They¡¯re pretty cool people. ¡­Is it weird that I think of them as people?¡± Laurel shook her head, making her curly hair wave back and forth. ¡°No, sweetie! After that update¡­ Something changed. Something fundamental.¡± Nathan chewed his lip thoughtfully. ¡°I hadn¡¯t put much thought into it myself. But I think our decision to keep the PC stuff on the down-low was a good choice. Let¡¯s keep a low profile and just try to ride this thing out.¡± I nodded at them and threw an arm over their shoulders. ¡°Sounds like an excellent plan.¡± Little did I know that there were forces in play that did not care for our ¡°keep it safe¡± attitude.