《The Helmet Hero.../villian》 oh boy. A man in a white tank top and blue jeans sits in his little shop waiting for his next customer. He is fit but not a jock. He inspects his wares, he usually sells submachine guns with other small handguns and weapons. Recently though he recieved some money from a friend. 2,000 dollars to be exact. He used it to make some bigger investments to his store, he was (in his head) on his way to becoming one of the best gun stores in the U.S.A.! Thats when a local gangmember stormed into his shop with a handgun. The bastard had wanted to grab all his best guns and run for it! Prick! The man reaches for the handgun stored under his desk in case of emergencies, but the gangster notices and panics. He raises his gun and, well, Unfortunatley this was the end for a promising youth just starting on his road to fame. sort of. I woke up to see an empty space as far as the eye can see in all directions. and a beefy (yet stubby) little man staring at me. He had a ginger beard and a big boisterous smile. "I like you. I think I''LL revive you this time... Finally I get to revive someone I actually like!" "what?" Then he was gone, and so was the white space. Now there was only suffocating dark. I start falling. and falling and falling *clunk!* "oww!" "wait why doesnt it hurt? ... And why do I feel so heavy?" I start looking around me and see a cave with no dinstinct features except for in being wet, gray, and dark. stalagtites stuck out of the cave at various angles. I look down upon myself and see only a breastplate, metal boots, and gountlets.If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation. "um okay?" I say Or at least I try to, all I really do is vibrate. Odd. I poke my finger between my gounlet and breastplate and my finger cuts through nothing but air. I pick myself up and shuffle over to a puddle nearby to see my reflection. the water is dirty and its dark but I can still make out what looks to be five floating peices of armor. all the same as before with the exception of a simple iron helmet with goatlike horns on it. and a pair of shoulder plates that are simple and round that fit between my helmet and breastplate quite nicely. oh okay. Now you may be thinking "why would this poor fool not be screaming his head off or crying? like a normal person?" well thats because he frankly isnt normal. You think a guy who just got a gangmember threaten him with a pistol, then proceed to try and take out a gun and shoot him in the balls will start crying or acting hysterical when he simply got reincarnated? Wrong. I can already tell this has to be like a light novel or something if I just met God and tuned into armor. No need to panic! he scans the room again to see if he spots any exits. He notices two different tunnels leading down below him. There is no difference between them so he heads down the right one. after about 30 second of walking a large white bat screeches and flys toward the armor. He instinctively shoots his gountlet out in a hook, knocking the bat monster down. now that he can see the bat he notices its blood red eyes and sharp ass teeth as well as its veiny wings. He goes in for a stomp but the bat reacts fast and shoots up like a bullet towards his face. before he can react to the suprise attack the bat bites into his helmet dentind and shredding the weak iron. The pain was impossible. litteraly he had no nerves, but he still felt it. It was like getting a drill and drilling his head in five places at once. In a sudden rage he hooks with his left on the bat with increased force and speed. the bat rams into the wall and in a burst of speed he pumelled the bat while it was cornered. I took 57 ora''s and 26 punches before the armor notices the bat isnt moving. he lookes down at the white goop and frowns internally. that was harder that it should have been. It was just a bat. Yet it crushed its helmet with ease. suddenly, a horn from his helmet extends to the goop and launches into it. Before it could react the goop was gone and his helmet felt... Better! fixed maybe. But also different, he looked around and noticed that he suddenly had night vision. well now it can see its surroundings thats nice at least. it enters the next room to see... a fuckin bat. dumb, doggo, and dumber. When he realized the bat was asleep he crouched low like in assassin''s creed and slowly moved around to circle the bat. When he was off to its side he lost his footing on a ledge and stumbled slightly. How had he missed that? A huge ravine like crack ran through the floor. It was wide enough to fit either 2 chubby humans or 3 fit ones and as long as an alligator. Slowly, he stepped away from the ravine and continued his sneak attack, the only sound being the bats breathing, the sound of dripping water, and the soft ¡°clink¡± of metal on stone. Once he was behind the bat however he stood up and sprinted towards it with his right hand raised in a fist. As he ran, and the bat panicked he threw a hook towards it, knocking it to the floor. He ran over and pummeled it some more, and sat down as his helmet horn drained the bat. Suddenly it was like he could sense vibrations in the air...He exclaimed (mentally) ¡°aha¡± while pounding his fist in his palm. ¡°I can absorb abilities!¡± ¡°Or body parts?¡± as he thought this he reached up to his helmet/head and felt around until he noticed a pair of small bats ears on the top of his head next to his horns. ¡°But can I control it?¡± Then he focused on where he felt his ears and willed them to disappear. Slowly they seemed to melt back into his head. For a couple of minutes he repeated the process of summoning his ears and then destroying them before he got the hang of it. ¡°Hey maybe this won¡¯t be so bad! If I just kill a few hundred humans maybe I could turn into one!¡± he joked dryly. That¡¯s when he noticed the vibrations. They seemed to ram into him surprising him slightly. He wouldn¡¯t have needed his ears to feel THAT. A wave of bats floods into the room hitting him like a truck. After getting knocked down they bit and clawed at him raking his chest with their claw like nails. Panicking he sprinted into the closest exit, the ravine. He sprinted then dolphin dived into the ravine losing sight fairly quickly. Then he fell. ¡°Oh hey it¡¯s the groun-¡± Stolen from its original source, this story is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings. *CRASH* He slammed into the ground like a cannonball before his pieces exploded into every direction. As he gathered himself together he heard dog-like whines coming from in front of him. He looked to see a extremely large pitch black dire-wolf laying on his side staring at him. It was sickly thin and had deep purple eyes. It¡¯s ears where lowered in a pout. He looked around the place and saw a cave well lit by the entrance a room away. He walked over to the deadly pitch black razor toothed beast demon¡­ and gave it a light pat on the head. ¡°I¡¯ll call you shadow!¡± he thought. Shadow looked baffled at his behavior. ¡°I¡¯ll come back and feed Shadow later, He looks sick. I feel kinda bad for it.¡± thinking this he walked into the room. The next thing he knew he was hiding behind a boulder. [Hey, why are we here again?] [To kill the wolf that lives here and make some extra cash idiot! If we can get iron equipment we¡¯ll be set for the dungeon in the forest.] [Oh yeah, so how tough are these dire wolf guys?] [Tough, they can easily hold a goliath on their backs while running. That¡¯s why some prefer to raise domestic breeds as mules or steeds.] [Ah, that makes sense] [But if we can catch it asleep or even just off guard and land a good hit, even once we can probably knock it out.] [probab-] This was all he needed to hear. They weren¡¯t strong and they were coming to kill shadow! ¡°I¡¯ll protect you doggo!¡± he thought as he rammed into the smart one with his shoulder like a quarterback. The man was sent flying and one of his horns cut him deeply in the side. The dumb one pulled out his sword to confront the 6 foot tall floating armor set. [The hell?] The armor sprinted towards him next with his fist raised. He swung his sword at his wide open side but the sword only made a dent in the iron plates. The metal plated fist rocketed toward him and sent him flying into a stalactite getting impaled in the process. It took just ten seconds but a adventurer died that day, right next to his unconscious comrade. He picked up the bodies and walked back into the wolfs room. He dropped the dead one in front of shadow and took the other to the corner. Then he waited. [huh!?] he woke up with a start. Then he wished he hadn¡¯t. A 6 foot tall set of iron armor was sitting there next to a sleeping dire wolf. [Hello? Who are you what do you want with me?] The armor waved his hand the the universal gesture for ¡®hello¡¯. Then he made the word town in sign language. [oh, um once your out of this cave it should be about 2 miles east from here¡­ are you a monster?] It nodded thoughtfully. Then it reached out it¡¯s hand, gripped the adventurers head and twisted. haha funy Joek! He stood up to his full height and walked over to the wolf. It seemed to be doing better, but it was still skinny as hell. Damn this guy looks like a plate of bbq ribs. Well I guess it¡¯s¡­ Hunting time! This is a fantasy world right? I wonder if they have guns, I mean I¡¯ve been in brawls but I¡¯m not muhammad. Do orcs taste good? Dragon probably would. Wait a second¡­ DRAGON?! Holy shit! Can you imagine the bullets I could make with dragon scales?! If they¡¯re like they are in movies, they could easily pierce a tank! Oh boy, Oh BOY! If you were to enter the cave at this moment you would see a 6 foot tall suit of armor jumping up and down next to a plate of furry ribs, seemingly excited to eat his meal. This would be comical if not for the fact that two human corpses were laid out on the floor right beside the ribs, making it seem it had a particular taste for human meat. Calming down he walked slowly out into the sunlight step, by step, until he was fully engulfed in beautiful yellow rays of sunlight poorly reflected off of his rusty iron plates. The warmth spread through his non-existent spine slowly until it reached his imaginary head. Love what you''re reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on. As he rejoiced in this glorious feeling he scanned his surroundings from the entrance. He was surrounded in pine and deep green. A pine forest that was so dark you couldn¡¯t see 6 feet in front of you, along with a small plume of smoke to the west and a mountain range to the east. In front of him behind the forest a small lake of deep, deep blue stood, tranquil in every sense of the word. The forest seemed large but not so much that he could not see aspect of the land around it. He walked down to sea level and started to traverse the forest. He extended the bat ears and looked out for any strange vibrations. After a short spell of walking he caught a unusually loud vibration. Slowly he crouched down and hid behind a tree, poking his helmet out his horns extending to the sky. He noticed a small buck feeding on grass a couple meters away. Slowly once again he inched away from the tree and got in pouncing position, he looked like an olympic sprinter. Three, two, one¡­ He burst out of the brush and collided with the buck. It wasn¡¯t very muscular so it could not quite escape in time. He clamped his hand around the buck and used his other to plunge into the throat of the animal. It slowly slumped over as the glimmer in its brightly colored eyes dimmed to an business like gray. He picked it up and brought it to the lair. He repeated this a few times until he had a good stack of food for doggo. Adventure time!(trademarked by cartoon network, I had no part of the process in making reviewing or funding this product. I have absolutely no affiliation with cartoon network.co Thank you). Jk (1/1/19) He started heading towards the plume of smoke. As he approached he could hear the bustling of people and the sound of wagons on dirt. He reached a clearing and stepped out of the brush to find a large wooden village in the distance. As well as a group of patrolling guards.